The journey into civilization took a bit longer than expected, but eventually, after taking nearly every mode of transportation known to man because you wanted to feel some semblance of normal after the week you had, you finally found yourself standing outside the door to your sister's quiet Chicago suburban home. It only occurred to you as your fist was centimeters from the oak stained wood, when you happened to catch the position of the hour and minute hands on your watch, that it was nearing midnight on a weekday. You were sure your sister and her husband had work in the morning, the kids were probably still out of school, on break for the holidays, but you assumed it was way past their bedtime. If you knocked, the dogs would most likely go nuts, waking the entire house, leaving everyone less than thrilled about your arrival...but on the other hand, you were exhausted. Your shoes were soaked through with slush from the ground and squelched uncomfortably every time you took a step, your cheeks stung from the wind whipping ice and snow at them, you were pretty sure the ends of your hair had icicles hanging from them where they stuck out from underneath your Purgatory National Park beanie, and it didn't help that your muscles were still sore from the night before. You leaned forward to rest your forehead against the cold wood of the front door with a soft groan as you adjusted your duffle bag on your shoulder. Somehow it hadn't even occurred to you to find a hotel for the night. You weren't really sure what you were thinking.

"You, unfortunately, were not." The voice startled you, to say the least. You jumped, barely managing to hold in a small squeak at the back of your throat. Your first instinct was to reach for the sidearm on your belt that you clearly did not have with you, but regardless, your hand went to where it was usually kept anyway as you turned around to place your back to the front door, while your eyes wildly scanned the yard and up and down the street. The voice spoke again, sounding like it was coming from directly behind you, or more accurately, from inside your own head. But it was more than that, it was like a miniscule vibration at the back of your skull. "You really think I would let someone sneak up on us while you are over here self-loathing over your lack of preparations? Come on Nicole, who do you think I am?" You knew the question was rhetorical, but it didn't stop your mind from literally going a mile a minute to try and come up with a logical answer. And then when you finally resigned to the fact that you were actually going insane, the voice spoke up again. "Oh, Relax. It is just me." And then it clicked and the world felt like it tipped 45 degrees on its axis and you had to steady yourself with a hand to the railing on the porch. You weren't sure how you knew it was her, but the odd familiarity in itself should have been enough.

"The w- you, you're the...you can...talk?" You probably looked insane talking to yourself, crazy-eyed and identical in resemblance to a drowned rat, but frankly, you couldn't care less...the wolf, The Wolf, was literally having a conversation with you. With words. You had so many questions, beginning with how, why, when-.

"Yes, I have the ability to commu-"

"Since when?! How?! Do you have a name?" You found yourself whisper-yelling to the wind as it whipped through the quiet neighborhood, taking your voice with it. The wolf sighed at your lack of poise and you were startled to find that you actually felt it, more than heard it.

"I go by many names."

"Right...makes sense, you're probably older than-" dirt. You were going to say dirt. God, Nicole, that's probably insulting to a literal ancient-

"But you may call me Ana."

"Ana, okay…" Honestly, you expected something a lot more complicated, but Ana...it fit. Somehow, when you thought of the wolf, Ana just seemed right.

"You have many questions. I can show you the answers, but perhaps you should get inside first." Good idea, you thought. "Oh, and Jim is coming down the stairs with a Glock 22. I would suggest knocking before it is aimed at your face."

Oh...oh.

"What?!" As the words registered, you turned in a panic, your duffle bag falling to the porch with a loud thump, not keen on getting shot by your brother-in-law/chief of police/previous mentor. You raised your fist to the door just as a light in the hall turned on, followed by the porch light and the sound of locks sliding open. You could just barely make out an exchange of whispered words, but the two voices were too low and you couldn't make out what was being said through the thick wood of the door. Too late to knock, you took a step back just as the door opened and revealed Jim, with his police registered firearm in his right hand, aimed low, wearing a plaid pair of boxers and a white t-shirt, hair unkempt and matted from sleep on one side. And just a step behind him, your sister, a plastic kid-sized baseball bat raised over her head, wide-eyed and a little shocked, a purple robe thrown haphazardly over a tank top and sleep shorts.

"Mini Haught?" "Nic?"

You grimaced. It was the middle of the night, you probably scared the absolute shit out of them, and now you felt bad.

"Surprise?" You barely got the word out of your mouth before Hailey was throwing the bat down and pushing Jim out of the way so she could throw herself at you in an attempt to wrap her arms around your shoulders in a hug, despite you still being drenched from the rain. As a reflex, your first instinct was to tense up. You were still sore, the cold was starting to seep past the wolf's - Ana's barriers, and honestly, you just weren't used to being held or touched, at least not by her. The last time you hugged your sister was...your parent's funeral...right after you left in the middle of the prayer. Had it really been that long?

Guilt seeped into the cracks of your heart that never properly healed after you ran from the only family you had left, in an attempt to protect them. You'd be lying if you said you didn't tear up when Hailey realized you weren't hugging her back and only tightened her hold on you. You hadn't planned on this being an emotional reunion, but you couldn't deny the hitch in your breath when you finally relaxed into the embrace and wrapped your arms around your sister, allowing your head to rest against her shoulder. She smelled just like you remembered: home, but now with a touch of baby powder and formula - which you weren't entirely sure about where that was coming from - and... something else slightly familiar, something that brought up memories from your first year with the Chicago Police Department when you had helped deliver a baby on the side of the highway. The thought slipped away though as Ana chose then to interrupt the moment with a "This is nice..." Although, you had to agree, and found yourself smiling into the side of Hailey's neck as your entire body began to warm.

"Alright, let's get you two inside, you're going to freeze if you stand out here any longer." Hailey laughed, but Jim was right. They were standing there in their pajamas, which really weren't fit for the winter. Not that your jeans, sweatshirt, and light jacket were any better, but you had other non-human means as well.

"Smart man." Ana agreed. You rolled your eyes as you stepped back, out of your sister's arms, and murmured, 'shut up' so low you were sure Hailey nor Jim heard. Hailey followed Jim into the house and they both waited for you just inside the door and out of the cold as you picked up your duffle from where it fell previously and went to join them.

"You know, you do not have to say things out loud for me to hear them. I can hear you just fine when you say it in your head."

"This is so fucking weird."

"So is talking to yourself. Now, stop doing that with your face, you look constipated." You hadn't been aware that you were doing anything with your face, but as soon as you consciously relaxed the muscles in your cheeks, you realized that yes, you were smiling like a complete weirdo with a secret to keep and the subtlety of a dragon in Times Square.

Hailey and Jim led you quietly through the foyer, where you politely toed out of your boots, removed your beanie from your head, and left your jacket on a hook by the door, and into the kitchen. They insisted you take a seat at the table while Jim put the kettle on the stove for tea and Hailey practically swaddled you in the softest blanket you had ever felt. It felt a good kind of weird to have your sister take care of you and if you were being honest, the cold that had seemingly took up residence in your bones seemed to have warmed significantly. You couldn't help but laugh at the situation as a whole, despite the spread of warmth through your chest at the gesture.

"What's so funny?" Hailey asked, taking a seat in the empty chair to your left, her own blanket tightly wrapped around her shoulders.

"You're just such a mom." Jim snorted and Hailey feigned offence with a mock gasp and a hand to her heart, but she was smiling and her eyes lit up, so it didn't really have the intended effect she was going for.

"Hey, someone has to take the responsibility. It certainly isn't this one." Hailey quipped, hooking her thumb over her shoulder, gesturing to the back of Jim's head as he removed the steaming kettle from the stove top and poured out three mugs full of freshly brewed tea.

"She's pointing at me, isn't she?" Hailey immediately dropped her hand back to the table just as Jim went to look back over his shoulder. You let out an airy chuckle before replying.

"Oh, one hundred percent, but I gotta give you props for the tea."

As he turned around, a mug in each hand, Jim was smiling wide. "Thank you! I knew I always liked you." He sent a wink in your direction as he set your mug down in front of you. You wrapped your hands around it immediately, soaking up as much of the heat as possible.

Following Jim with your gaze, you squinted your eyes and tilted your head skeptically. "Did you though?"

Jim shrugged. "I mean, not when you were kicking my ass straight out of the academy, but I guess you grew on me."

You barked out a laugh and turned to Hailey who had just brought her mug to her lips. "Hear that, Hailey? I grew on him." Hailey snorted into her mug, nearly sending hot tea straight into her lap as she rolled her eyes.

"You have that effect on people, it's annoying. Way to boost her ego, J. You're going to give her an even bigger head."

You were smiling into your mug as the conversation died down into a comfortable silence, the only sound coming from Jim as he stirred sugar into his cup. As the silence stretched on, Ana became more and more comfortable with the people across from you and you couldn't help when your smile grew impossibly larger.

You broke the silence to whisper out into the quiet of the early morning, "I missed this."

"We missed you." Hailey punctuated her statement by placing her hand over your knee and it came to a surprise to you when you didn't flinch away from the touch. If you let yourself, you could cry. Right there in your sister's kitchen, you could've let it all out. You missed her terribly, and yeah that was your fault, but you were there now, after years of keeping yourself at a distance. Ana even seemed to like them, or she at least liked that you liked them and the fact that they brought you so much joy.

The three of you had settled into your respective chairs around the table, silently sipping at your tea and just genuinely enjoying the others company without words. With the quiet of the house, you could hear the dogs somewhere upstairs, you presumed locked away in your sister's and Jim's room, the kids were silent, surely sleeping, but you did pick up on something a little odd and it made you pause with your hand halfway to bringing your tea to your lips again. No one else seemed to pick up on it, so you figured it was simply your over-sensitive hearing picking up something from outside the walls of the house and chose to ignore it.

It wasn't until Jim set down his mug, turned to you, and started to ask you something that you heard it again, this time clearer, grabbing Ana's attention. Your ears pricked up and you tried to focus enough to identify something that you thought should've been an obvious sound, but it was so out of place, you thought surely you were mistaken.

"Hold on, sorry I don't mean to interrupt...do you guys have a TV on or something upstairs?"

Hailey looked to Jim, shaking her head as Jim shrugged and answered for the both of them, "I don't think so, why?"

"Never mind, I thought I just heard-" you were cut off by the unmistakable wail of a newborn.

It only confused you more when Jim jumped out of his chair so quick that he nearly knocked his mug over and exclaimed, "Oh! I've got her. I'll right back..." seemingly oblivious to your ignorance.

As Jim climbed the stairs two at a time, you turned to Hailey, obvious confusion written all over your face. "A baby?" you asked. She didn't say anything, suddenly finding a small chip in the wood of her kitchen table the most interesting thing in the world and it was her lack of confirmation that sent a pang straight through your heart and down into your lungs, your breath catching in your throat.

You had to clear your throat when just a few minutes later, Jim brought down a tiny bundle of light blue blankets with yellow giraffes on them and asked if you wanted to hold her, your niece. You opened your mouth to respond, but found yourself speechless at how small she was and how perfect she looked, with hair as fire red as yours, brown eyes wide and curious.

When your other niece and your nephew were born, you didn't allow yourself to hold them, terrified to allow yourself that privilege, terrified to tinge their innocence with the curse living just under your skin. That same fear was present even now, years later, even after you managed to control it for the most part. Somewhere inside you, you knew you wouldn't hurt her, you knew Ana wouldn't hurt her, but there were still the images of the young woman you did hurt floating around at the back of your head - her death had been written down as an animal attack and it was, but the CPD didn't know that animal was you.

Ana was strangely quiet through the whole ordeal, but you could feel the pull in your chest, her want to hold the baby and to protect her. In a way, it was similar to the way she was with you.

"It's okay, Nic. You can hold her." At Hailey's words, you looked up, hoping the hurt in your eyes wasn't too obvious, or that the early hours of the morning and your exhaustion masked it somewhat. You didn't want to think about all the opportunities she had to tell you she was expecting and you didn't want to call her out about it in front of Jim, who clearly didn't know she hadn't told you.

So instead, you choked out, "what's her name?" as Jim carefully placed her in your arms.

You were distracted by the sense of content coming from Ana and the warmth in your chest, so much so that you didn't catch on to what Hailey had said at first in response to your question. It took you nearly a minute, you were sure, before the name came at you like the Maglev, you standing in the middle of the tracks, your feet cemented to the ground.

"Rayleigh." Your head snapped up so fast you were sure you gave yourself whiplash, or maybe you were just dizzy from the situation as a whole, but Hailey was nodding her head and she had a sad regretful smile on her face, an unsaid apology, as she continued. "She looks exactly like you did when you were born, even if she has Jim's nose, she's strong and stubborn and that hair...the name fit."

You still couldn't manage words, so you looked down at the bundle in your arms as an excuse to hide the tears building in the corners of your eyes and whispered to your niece while Jim said something about setting up a bed and Hailey took the opportunity to get a bottle ready. By the time she was finished though, Rayleigh had fallen asleep again, your finger grasped tightly in her tiny fist.

"Look at that, who knew mini Haught was a baby whisperer." It was Jim who broke the silence and when he bent down to relieve you, Ana nearly cried out in protest. You had to bite your tongue to prevent any sound from escaping past your lips and if anything happened to make it out, you covered it up by clearing your throat. "I made up the couch for you for now. There aren't any sheets on the guest bed upstairs."

You had to tear your eyes away from the baby as Jim tucked her into his chest, but when you responded, you managed a steady voice and what you hoped looked like a grateful smile. "The couch is perfect. Thanks, Jim."

"Make yourself at home. If you're hungry, you can eat whatever you can find."

"I actually think I'm just going to pass out, if that's ok?" If Jim caught on to your sudden shift in attitude, he didn't say anything.

"Of course! We're just going to head back upstairs and feed her. You're good down here by yourself?"

"I'll be fine, thank you." The three of you bid each other a goodnight and it wasn't until the light in the foyer blinked off that you released a labored sigh and eventually removed yourself from your spot at the table to take the three empty mugs to the sink and washed them, just for something to do with your hands. It didn't take as long as you would have liked and soon, you were abandoning the sink to go take up residence on the couch, where you found a pillow and a folded blanket on one of the arms.

The couch wasn't as lumpy as you had anticipated, but your thoughts were running rampant and you couldn't stop twisting and turning long enough to actually fall asleep. It seemed like as soon as your brain quieted down, the sun was rising and shooting its beams through the light curtains over the windows and into your eyes and then the kids were running down the stairs and all thoughts of sleep were quickly forgotten. Ana hadn't said a word the entire rest of the night. Maybe she was letting you stew in your thoughts alone or maybe she just didn't have anything to say. You knew she felt the betrayal just as much as you did.

You put on a fake smile in the bathroom before Hailey made it down the stairs and for breakfast you made waffles with fruit and bacon you found in the freezer for everyone. You even squeezed fresh orange juice and made coffee. It got your mind off of things and maybe waffles were the only thing you vaguely knew how to make. Turns out following waffle mix box instructions and throwing a cookie sheet full of meat in the oven for 15 or so minutes weren't very difficult tasks.

The kids had a lot to say when they discovered you in the kitchen that morning, and even more to say once they knew you were staying for a bit. They wanted you to go sledding with them and build snow people in the backyard and then drink so much hot chocolate and eat so many cookies you felt sick, and they made promises to show you their Christmas gifts and everything you never knew you missed because you were too busy hiding. And if you spent the entire day holed up in your niece and nephew's rooms playing with Legos and doing puzzles on the floor instead of talking to your sister, you didn't acknowledge it.

The next day went on in pretty much the same way, until it didn't.

You and the kids were playing in the backyard with the dogs, throwing snowballs and making snow forts until the cold was too much for them and you shooed them inside with the promise of hot chocolate and sandwiches for lunch. The kids were still removing their boots and snowpants while you put the kettle on to boil water. You barely had a few minutes reprieve though before Ana picked up on the sound of footsteps coming down the stairs. You followed them with your ears into the foyer and didn't bother lifting your head when they entered into the kitchen.

"You're avoiding me."

She caught you at the island, making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, ten pieces of bread all laid out with five of them in the process of being smothered in creamy peanut butter.

"No, I'm not."

"Liar," Ana decided to throw in.

"Shut up."

"You are."

"Am not."

"Yes, you are, but I don't blame you." If your eyes could stare holes through solid objects, you're sure the countertop would have burst into smithereens by that point. Hailey sighed. "Nic-"

"I have to tell you something. Before you say anything else..."

"Now? Really?"

Actually, you had planned on sitting Hailey down after dinner one night and telling her everything Ewan had told you, but now that the thought was in your head, yes...now would have to do, considering the words had already left your mouth in an unfortunate case of word vomit. She probably thought you were still mad over the fact that she didn't tell you about Rayleigh, and yeah, you kind of were, but she wasn't the only one that was keeping a secret.

"Okay…"

"You should probably sit down." She did. Right there, across from you at the island.

You spread jelly onto the bread while you told her everything, starting from the beginning, all the while keeping a close ear out for any small feet on the carpeted floor of the living room. The TV was on so you didn't bother worrying about the kids overhearing. You told her how you were bit, you told her about your father, about your mother, about your brother and how he really died (you were slightly surprised when she knew of him at all, even though you shouldn't have been). You told her about The Order and how you were handling it. You told her about Ana.

And after you stress ate the five peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and you just stood there watching your sister for any indication that she had even heard any of that, the only thing that came out of her mouth was a 'huh…' as she got up from the bar stool and made her way to the fridge, pulling out a full bottle of red wine, uncorked it like a pro and didn't even bother grabbing a glass before she gulped down a few mouthfuls like it was water from the tap. So, it wasn't your fault when you bristled and your hands balled into fists on the countertop. You weren't sure what you were expecting, but that 100% was not it.

"Really, Hailey?" You scoffed. "Look, I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but at least I didn't hide the fact that I was pregnant from my sister. I mean, come on, she's practically the spitting image of me for Christ's sake."

You should've kept your mouth shut, you really should have, but you couldn't help yourself, and like usual, once you started something, you had to finish it. But like all Haught's, so did your sister.

"At least I don't hide from the only family I have left and play in the woods all day." Hailey brought the bottle back to her lips and tipped it back while you tried to wrap your head around what just came out of her mouth. It was a low blow, but maybe that was what she was going for. She probably felt lied to and she didn't know how else to deal with it.

"That's not fair."

"No?"

"That's my job, I don't really have a choice-"

"So quitting the force and moving to an entirely different country wasn't your choice? Not using the days off they give you to come home so I can see my sister more than once every few years isn't your choice?" You could feel the fire in your gut roaring and it took everything in you to keep your voice calm.

"I have to use those days for other things, Hailey…"

"Wolf things?" The way she spit out the word 'wolf' set you on edge and Ana growled deep in the back of your throat, but still you kept your voice a stoic calm.

"Is that a problem?"

"It is when you're avoiding us because of it, Nicole!" And there it was, the straw that broke the camel's back, if you will. Her words felt like a physical blow to your gut and you had to grip hard to the edge of the counter to keep upright. As she raised the bottle in her hand to her lips for the third time, your voice rang out in a desperate plea for something akin to forgiveness.

"Would you rather they be dead because of me?! Because I've killed before, Hailey, and I don't think I could live with myself if anything happened to those kids because of me. Or you, or Jim, or-" Your words cut out only as your voice broke and so many tears clouded your vision that your sister was nothing more than a blur in front of you. Your chest ached and you were uncomfortable, but you couldn't take the words back now that they were out there. Only after you had finished did your sister finally set the half empty bottle of wine back onto the counter.

"Is that why you haven't… oh, Nicky." Hailey made to go around the island, probably with the intention of hugging you or something equally as unwanted. You instinctively backed up as far as you could into the counter at your back, all the while your head shaking back and forth, telling her not to take another step closer no matter how bad your heart or Ana may have needed the contact.

It was a weak attempt and she had already halted her advances toward you, but you managed to croak out a quiet, "don't".

"Nicole," she pleaded, gentle. You were the wild animal trapped in a corner (again) and she was the supposed threat only trying to help, but you wouldn't (or couldn't) let her.

"No, I need to- I'll be back later." It took everything in you, but you made your legs move past your sister and you felt her eyes on you the entire way out the front door. You didn't look back and you didn't bother grabbing your jacket or your boots. She didn't even try to stop you until the door was already closing and she managed to slip a panicked, "Nicole, wait!" out into the cold air just before the door clicked shut.

You didn't really have a plan, you had nowhere to go, so you just started walking and before you even realized it, your phone was pressed to your ear and you were speaking into it.

"I need you to say something completely stupid, but oddly helpful in a way that shouldn't make sense."

"Hi to you too, Haught."

"Wy…" you sighed.

"I take it your sister didn't take the whole Big Bad Wolf thing that well?"

"You could say that."

"So, are we talking about it or not talking about it?"

"I told her everything."

"Ok, looks like we're talking about it."

"No. Wynonna, I told her everything." There was a long pause on the other line, so long you had to check to make sure you hadn't accidentally ended the call, but the seconds were still ticking up and there was still a picture of Wynonna's drooling face staring back at you on the screen. Then there was a lot of loud shuffling and footsteps and voices you couldn't make out and then you could hear wind pick up in the background and Wynonna was speaking again.

"Even about the-"

"Yes...in one way or another." She whistled long and low and took another pause.

"And then what…?"

"And then I left." Which sounded completely childish now that you had said it out loud and to another person.

"Wait, why? Did she threaten to call the police or something? Cuz you kinda are the police. And so is her husband, if I remember correctly..."

"No, she didn't- No. She was just looking at me with those eyes and I couldn't- I don't know." You really didn't know.

"Are you spiraling? You're not really making any sense here Nicole. Do I need to drag your ass back to Hell to-?"

"No. No dragging anyone back to anywhere, I just- Just talk to me."

"About what?"

"Literally anything: Tell me what you had for breakfast, where are you, what are you looking at, how's that love life of yours- wait, never mind, not that. Literally anything but that."

"My love life, huh? You must really be desperate. Look, talking isn't really my thing, I'm more of a drink about it type of person. As soon as you get back we can crack open the bottle of that shit collecting dust in the bottom drawer of your nightstand. But you know who just loves talking? Waverly. Here she is." She must've started handing the phone over halfway through her sentence because there was a lot of rustling hushed whispers and in the middle of it all you heard her yell, clear as day, "Oh, and happy birthday!"

"What? Wynonna, wait!" Except, it wasn't Wynonna who answered.

"Um, hello?" It was Waverly, and you could picture the crease in her forehead as she said it, confused. Your heart jumped at the thought of her, at home on the couch, probably with a book in her lap that Wynonna had rudely interrupted her from reading.

"Uh...hi." Wow, what a way with words, Haught.

"Who is this?"

"She really just threw the phone at you huh?" You sighed. Of course she did. That was Wynonna for you.

Sometime between the time it took Wynonna to decide to hand the phone to someone else and the time it took you to realize that someone else was Waverly, you had made it back to your sister's house. You hadn't walked that far, barely to the end of the block, before you turned around. But you weren't ready to go back inside and face her yet, despite the snow seeping into your socks, so you settled for sitting at the end of the driveway, in nothing but a t-shirt and a pair of Chicago PD sweatpants Hailey let you borrow from Jim.

"More or less. Sorry, your contact name is literally just the pig and full moon emoji…which is like the highest form of love, coming from Wynonna, but it doesn't help me any."

"Really? The moon didn't give it away?" It took her a few seconds, but that brain of hers was something else and she caught up quick.

"...Nicole?"

"Hi."

"Hey." Her tone was breathy and you could've sworn she sounded every bit nervous as you felt, but she paused and quickly recovered with, "So, it's your birthday?"

"I guess it is," you laughed and it was the first time you felt like you could breathe since you left the house.

Before you knew it, the sun was dipping below the houses on the opposite side of the street and the two of you had talked through dinner and into the evening. It wasn't until Waverly had to pause several times in a row to yawn that you finally called it a night and headed back inside with what felt like a burden of weight lifted from your chest. You said goodnight with promises of talking again soon, promises you intended to keep because you genuinely enjoyed talking to Waverly about nothing, but seemingly everything at the same time, and the thought made you giddy and warmed something deep inside you.

As you walked into the house, your intention was to head straight for the bathroom to brush your teeth and head upstairs to say goodnight to the kids if they weren't already asleep, but instead, you found yourself face to face with Hailey, changed into her pajamas, her hair up and make up off. She looked tired. She didn't let you get very far before she was wrapping her arms around your frame and spewing apologies.

"Before you run away again, I need you to know that how I handled that...whole..thing... was completely wrong."

"Hailey, it's fine-" You were tired so you tried to stop her from saying whatever sappy shit was about to come out of her mouth, but she let go of you in favor of giving you a look that said she needed to do this, she needed you to hear what she had to say. It shut you up in an instant and she continued.

"No, it's not fine. I wasn't weirded out or disgusted, and I know that was probably how it felt to you, but I just didn't know how to process it all. It's still a lot to process." She paused. You probably knew more than anyone that it was a hell of a lot to process. Shit, you were still trying to process it all. "I can see why you would keep something like that from me. I get it. I mean, fuck, I didn't even tell you I was pregnant, Nicky, and I should have. I'm your sister, she's your niece. We named her after you. I am so sorry.

I should have been there for you back then. I should have seen what you were going through, or at least noticed you were going through something. I'm your older sister, that's kinda my job and I royally screwed that up. But I know now, and I learn from my mistakes. I'm here, Nic, whenever you need me, for whatever. Even if that whatever is wolf stuff- No, especially if that whatever is wolf stuff. I don't think I understand a lot of it, but I'd be willing to, with some help."

Before your sister could get another word in, you pulled her in for a hug and pretended it wasn't the first you initiated in years as quiet tears stained both your cheeks.

"I didn't let you see it, that's not your fault," you whispered into her hair. She pulled out of the embrace at your words and shook her head.

"But I didn't pay attention, and that is my fault."

"You didn't know what to pay attention to, " you shrugged. "We both screwed up. I should've told you, I'm sorry..."

"I'm sorry too."

"No more secrets?" You asked, ready to spill any amount of beans it would take to get your relationship with your sister back.

"None, Peanut." She didn't know it, but the nickname your father gave you coming from her mended a part of you you didn't know was torn and the relief that spread through your chest was nearly overwhelming. At the first sight of fresh tears, Hailey smiled up at you and in an attempt to move the conversation on, cleared her throat, "Now, come on, I made popcorn and found M&M's and skittles from Halloween." You made a retching noise at the back of your throat, but didn't protest further when she grabbed your hand and dragged you into the kitchen behind her.

"I hated when Dad used to do that," you laughed, using your free hand to wipe away any remnants of tears left on your cheeks.

"Yeah, but I'm feeling nostalgic, The Mummy is on, and I definitely didn't leave you a birthday present on the bed in the guest room that you're not allowed to open until we've watched a young Brendan Fraser run through the desert for the 100th time. Well, I'll be watching young Brendan Fraser, you can watch Rachel Weisz or whoever." And disgusting as it was, the two of you watched The Mummy on the couch and ate the entire bowl of popcorn with skittles and M&M's mixed into it. Every time you grabbed a handful with a little of each, you thought of Friday nights with your dad and Hailey on the couch in the basement, working your way through his collection of DVDs. You felt a part of yourself that you nearly forgot about start to feel whole again and Ana let you enjoy the moment, just you and Hailey. You both ended up falling asleep before Imhotep took over the villagers though and later (much later), when Jim finally got home from working a double shift at the station downtown, you followed him up the stairs as he carried Hailey to bed, said your goodnights, and collapsed onto the guest room bed, nearly crushing a small, flat box under the weight of your body. You assumed it was the gift Hailey mentioned and picked it up. The box wasn't wrapped, just a simple medal box no bigger than your hand, engraved with the initials LC.

Lily Caine, you assumed.

Just thinking her name sent a wave of guilt through your heart and a brick of lead straight to your gut.

With shaky hands, you carefully pried the lid of the box open. Inside was a handwritten note, in Hailey's perfect script, that read:

She would have wanted you to have this. Happy birthday, Nic.

I meant what I said- I'm here and I'm not going anywhere. We're your family, we have to stick together.

I love you,

Hailey

You ran your fingers over the words as you read it over and over and over, until you memorized every word and believed them. Hailey was in your life with the intention of sticking around. She accepted you and she trusted you.

If a few tears fell from your eye, only Ana knew anything about it.

You removed the note carefully, not wanting to crease it, and placed it on the bed beside you. Underneath the note was a black velvet bag, cinched at the top with a golden strand of rope. You untied the knot slowly, not entirely sure of what you would find when you reached into the bag. Your heart was very nearly beating straight out of your chest and you had to remind yourself to breathe, Nicole to get a proper amount of oxygen into your lungs. It proved to be futile though. When you reached your hand inside the bag, you found yourself holding four things: a photograph, a pair of dog tags, what looked like a very old coin, and a pocket-sized leatherbound journal with frayed edges and a worn cover.

The photograph grabbed your attention first. The color was faded and it was well worn around the edges, but the picture was clear as day. You found yourself staring at your family, complete and stuck in a time over two and a half decades in the past. Your mother was stood with Hailey planted on her hip, the both of them smiling wide, Hailey showing off a gap in between her two front teeth. Your father stood to her left, in his fatigues, clean-shaven with hair the same auburn shade as yours. He had one of his arms wrapped around your mother's shoulders, his other hand resting on the shoulder of a young man. The boy had slight stubble on his chin, and shaggy unkempt hair on his head, no older than 18.

Seeing him hurt. He was so young and happy and he was taken away far too soon, by someone who never had the right.

You had to admit though, Ewan was right. You had the same eyes, the same dimpled grin, the same hair.

In his arms laid a small bundle, nearly completely hidden beneath a yellow blanket, but you couldn't miss the tuft of red hair sticking out if you tried. Your heart ached for a brother you never knew and a family you only thought you knew.

The picture was so worn, it was nearly see-through and through the tears that had built up in your eyes, you noticed black ink on the reverse side of the photo. Upon flipping it over, you found your mother's handwriting, scrawled diagonally across the back.

January 23, 1990

Lake Michigan, Ry's 18th

Kade, Lily, Ryan, Hailey, Nicole

And suddenly you had a name to the face you wish you had been given the chance to know.

Ryan Haught.

You didn't think you could take much else. You were exhausted, your heart and your head hurt. It had been a long day and the night wasn't faring any better, it seemed. With a promise to yourself to look closer at the remaining objects left behind by your mother in the morning, you sent off a quick text to Dolls with an attachment of the picture, front and back.

[Haught (4:19)]: See if this helps Jeremy at all.

[Haught (4:19)]: Send me what you find.

Sleep took over soon after you hit send and honestly, you weren't surprised when you didn't wake up until after noon the next day. And only then, it was because your phone chirped six times in quick succession and you found one text from Dolls, an email notification, and four more texts from an unknown number. You had half a mind to ignore them all and go back to bed, but last night's events rushed to the forefront of your mind and you were suddenly wide awake.

The text from Dolls was nothing more than a confirmation that he got your messages and would do everything he could to get any information about your brother. You assumed the email was exactly that and didn't think that moment was the best time to read through it - you at least needed coffee before falling down that rabbit hole. The scene of blood pooling into the cracks of the cabin floor was still too fresh, especially now that you knew who it belonged to.

The four remaining messages however were something you could easily deal with.

[Unknown Number (12:43)]: Hey, I hope this isn't weird, but after yesterday I just thought that maybe it would be easier if I had your number!

[Unknown Number (12:43)]: It's Waverly by the way!

[Unknown Number (12:43)]: Waverly Earp.

[Unknown Number (12:44)]: Wynonna's sister.

You laughed. It was easy and genuine and it bubbled out of you like a shaken soft drink after removing the cap. It was exactly what you needed.

[Nicole Haught (12:47)]: Wynonna has a sister?

[Waves (12:47)]: Funny.

[Nicole Haught (12:48)]: I know.

[Nicole Haught (12:49)]: Totally not weird, by the way.

[Waves (12:49)]: You sure?

[Nicole Haught (12:49)]: Positive.

[Nicole Haught (12:51)]: And I wanted to thank you.

[Nicole Haught (12:52)]: For the other day.

[Waves (12:52)]: Don't mention it.

[Waves (12:52)]: I had fun talking to you.

[Nic (12:53)]: Yeah? I had fun talking to you too, Wave.

You and Waverly went back and forth all afternoon like teenagers. She even facetimed you after dinner under the pretense of sore thumbs and tired eyes, which you knew were blatant lies, but you couldn't bring yourself to care. Back at the cabin, you had watched her work well into the morning hours, sitting in front of a computer screen, typing away frantically, and only calling it quits when she literally couldn't keep her head up any longer. Not that you were complaining. You could've talked nonsense with her all night. Actually, you almost got away with it, but sometime after your debate about whether egg is pronounced with a long or short 'e' and sometime before your disagreement was resolved about whether shooting half of a 5-hour energy would give you two and a half hours of max energy or five hours of half-assed energy, Wynonna showed up.

You agreed to disagree about the whole egg thing, but Waverly argued that it literally states on the bottle that if you drink only half, it would result in five hours of half the amount of energy you would get compared to drinking the entire shot. You knew that, but Waverly got so passionate about arguments she knew she could win that you couldn't help but feed into it a little bit. The two of you got so into it though, that Wynonna finally had to step in and eventually hung up on you and you didn't hear back from Waverly until the following afternoon by text, stating that Wynonna hid her phone in the tampon box under the sink. You may or may not have sent Wynonna a lovely message that simply contained two short words, to which she replied with the middle finger emoji.