A/N: Usual thanks to BellaMadonna and LittleClareStar for being such awesome betas. I couldn't do this without them. Thank you to Silver Sniper for pre-reading and reassuring me that this doesn't suck. ILY.
Thank you to RoseArcadia who made me a kick-ass blinkie!! Link to it is on my profile and on my Twilighted forum.
Disclaimer: SM owns Twilight, but Blindella is all mine.
Chapter 14 – Helplessly Hopelessly
I can stand with the weight of the world
On my shoulders
I can fight with the toughest of the tough
I can laugh in the face
Of all my insecurities
Anytime, anywhere, anything
I'm strong enough
But when you're holding me like this
I'm carelessly lost in your touch
I'm completely defenseless
Baby, it's almost too much
I'm helplessly, hopelessly, recklessly
Falling in love
Helplessly Hopelessly - Jessica Andrews
BPOV
My body was warm, and comfortable and just felt...safe. Edward's arms were tightly wrapped around me, our legs intertwined with my face buried in his chest. I inhaled his distinctive scent as I placed the arm that was not stuck between the mattress and my body around Edward's waist, pulling my body closer to his. His breathing was steady, his chest rising and falling evenly against mine as he slept.
Last night was probably the best night's rest I'd ever had. I had been hesitant to stay the night, unsure whether I would even be able to sleep next to someone else, even if it was Edward. I'd never slept beside anyone and I was so rigid in my sleep patterns. Of course, things with Edward were never as I expected. Despite being pinned to his body for the entire night, barely able to move, with our limbs tangled together, I'd never felt so at ease and secure and protected.
The previous day had been a whirlwind of emotions I hadn't expected. I'd been only slightly prepared for meeting Edward's father. Edward had provided me with a little bit of information about him in the past, but not nearly enough. I'd always known it was a sensitive subject and had never wanted to push him to talk about anything he wasn't ready to discuss with me.
When Carlisle had first introduced himself to me, I had felt that maybe Edward and Alice had been exaggerating. He'd seemed to be a more than perfect gentleman. Of course, that had lulled me into a false sense of security, so I had been completely unprepared for his outright disregard and disdain for Edward's talents and passion for music. It upset me to my core. I had no idea what came over me, but I found myself defending Edward and being completely out of line. I'd never spoken to an adult in such a manner before, especially not someone I had just met. I just couldn't help myself. Edward did not deserve to be treated that way, not by his father or anyone else. How a parent could dismiss outright their child's dreams was so beyond me.
When I'd gone to the bathroom, I'd heard their voices carrying and although I knew it was wrong to eaves drop, as soon as I heard my name uttered I couldn't help myself; I had to listen. It stung to hear what Edward's father said about me.... especially when he didn't even know anything about me. Edward immediately defended me and a sense of overwhelming pride and love filled me. I knew Edward didn't see me as a burden, but I had to ask him. I couldn't bear it if there was even the slightest possibility he saw me that way. I'd worked too hard for too long learning to be strong and independent and I refused to be seen that way.
I still didn't understand Edward's father's behavior, but it began to make a bit more sense after Edward's brief explanation to me last night.
Edward's confession that Carlisle was not his biological father was a complete shock to me. I never even expected that. It broke my heart that not only had Edward lost the father that shared his blood, he was losing the father who raised him. I vowed to myself last night that I would not let him lose any semblance of a relationship with his father, especially when he was still alive. I also vowed to help Edward find his biological dad. He deserved to know where he came from. I knew what it was like to live without parents; I couldn't let Edward feel that same pain.
Moving my arm from around his waist, I trailed my hand up the front of Edward's body until I found the curve of his jaw. Gently, I ran my fingers over the planes of his face, feeling every soft inch of skin mixed with the roughness of the stubble along his jaw. I caressed every line and crease that I'd memorized over the previous weeks. I committed to memory the way his eye-lids fluttered under my careful touch and the way his lips moved as I traced them lightly.
Tilting my head up slightly, my lips found their way to the edge of Edward's jaw. Tentatively, I began kissing my way across it and down his neck, loving the way his facial hair scratched at my sensitive lips. I brought my hand to rest on his lower back underneath his t-shirt and rubbed my fingers gently against his skin. It was so smooth and soft; I hadn't expected a boy's skin to be so soft. The muscles in his back contracted as he tightened his grip around me. He shifted his body, unintentionally rubbing a very hard part of his anatomy against a very sensitive area of mine. I gasped, stilling my lips against his neck.
"Mmm, morning Angel," Edward whispered, his voice thick and husky from the lack of use throughout the night. He chuckled softly, obviously knowing what he had just done to me.
"Sorry for waking you," I apologized as I continued kissing my way up his jaw, searching for his lips, not feeling sorry at all.
"I want to be woken up this way every morning," he mumbled, bringing his hand up, from its position on my lower back, to cup my cheek and bring my lips to his. He moved his lips gently and slowly across mine as his fingers found their way into my hair. I sighed against his mouth, parting my lips and slipping my tongue out to run across his lower lip. Immediately, his mouth opened. An uncontrollable moan escaped me as Edward massaged my tongue with his. I knew I would never ever get bored with kissing Edward. Every time was a completely new experience with completely new emotions consuming me.
Edward rolled us over so I was on my back while he hovered above me. Our lips never parted except to take shallow, needy breaths. I ran my hands up under Edward's shirt, rubbing my hands up and down the bare skin of his back. Abruptly, Edward removed his lips from mine, the heat of his body gone. I whimpered at the loss of contact.
"Just taking off my shirt, baby," he whispered before his lips were on mine again. I brought my hands back down onto his back before trailing my fingers around his sides and then hesitantly across his chest. I let myself explore the contours of his chest and abdomen as we kissed, feeling every muscle as it contracted and memorizing the way his skin felt under my finger tips. My fingers slid smoothly up to his neck, then I dragged them downwards, letting my nails scratch through the soft splattering of hair on his chest. He groaned as I made contact with his nipples. I gasped, my hands flying away from them in surprise.
Edward chuckled, stopping our kissing for a moment. "It felt good, you don't need to stop." His voice was thick and raspy and reverberated through my body causing me to shiver.
"Are you alright?" Edward asked, his hand moving softly up and down my bare leg. Goosebumps flared along my skin as his hand slowly slid underneath the t-shirt I was wearing.
"Yeah, I'm good," I whispered, nodding my head. "Really good," I moaned as his lips made contact with my neck and he kissed and nibbled his way up to my ear. He sucked gently on the skin, shooting intense tingles down on my spine.
"Bella?" he whispered in my ear, his breath hot as it fanned across the side of my face.
"Hmmm?" I responded, barely coherent, thanks to the sensation of his lips on my neck and the gentle touch of his fingers which were at this moment making slow circles up and down my thigh.
"As much as I love seeing you in my shirt, I want nothing more than to admire what's underneath it. Can I see you?" he asked softly, as he slowly began pushing the shirt up my legs. My heart pounded in my chest, nervous for him to see me in only my panties. I'd never been that exposed to him before. I nodded slowly, not trusting my voice. I wanted this, though. I wanted to feel our bare skin against each other. I wanted to be that close with him. The need was building up inside me, and lately it had started to become so intense it was almost unbearable.
The more intimate we were, the more overwhelming my feelings for Edward became. Every single touch from him made me feel special, wanted, loved. I had no idea if that's how he felt about me or not, but I could just feel it, deep inside of me. I knew he cared about me, that much was obvious, but we never talked about our feelings. I so badly wanted to tell him how I felt. But I just couldn't yet. I couldn't take the rejection or make him feel obligated to say it back. Our relationship was still so new. We'd only known each other for just over a month, even though it seemed like so much longer. I knew everything was moving so fast but it felt so natural, so perfect, that I didn't dare question it. I'd never been in love before, but that was the only way I could explain the intensity of the emotions I felt every time I was around Edward, or each time he cropped up in my thoughts. The circumstances I'd been dealt had made me thick skinned and strong. But with every touch, every kiss and every term of endearment Edward uttered, he cracked down the carefully constructed walls. I was helplessly, hopelessly, falling in love with him.
Swiftly, Edward pulled the shirt over my head and away from my body. The cool air rushed against my skin causing goose-bumps to flair across every inch of me.
"You're so perfect," Edward whispered, "every single part of you."
I felt my cheeks flame, not sure why I was embarrassed. I knew Edward would never lie to me. His voice was so full of need and admiration, it made me melt inside, emotions only Edward could make me feel, rushing through me like waves.
Edward shifted his body so he was hovering over me again and then all at once my skin was warm again, the heat of his body radiating off him and settling into me. His lips found mine again as he lowered his body so our chests were touching.
I gasped, pulling away from the kiss, nothing preparing me for the intensity and overwhelming feeling of having skin to skin contact with Edward like this. The soft hairs of his chest brushed against my breasts, causing my nipples to instantly harden. I had no idea it could feel like this. I had no idea just simply feeling his skin against mine would be this all-consuming. Instinctively, I wrapped my arms around him hugging him closer to me. The sound that fell from his lips was so... primal. Weeks ago it would have frightened me, but now, it spurred me on.
Without thinking, I wrapped my legs around his waist, pulling him down into me. We moaned simultaneously at the contact, only the thin barrier of our underwear between us.
I ground my hips against his, urging him to do the same. This was farther than we'd ever gone before, but I couldn't help it. I needed him.
"Bella are you sure-"
"I want you," I panted, not even bothered by my boldness. The sound that came out of his mouth was all the confirmation I needed that he wanted it too. I knew he was just worried about me, never wanting to feel like he was pushing me to do something I wasn't comfortable with.
He rubbed his body up and down mine, unrecognizable sounds escaping my lips each time he hit my most sensitive spot. It felt so good I didn't want to stop, but there was something else I wanted to do more.
I brought my hands up to his shoulders, pushing him gently, hinting to him that I wanted him to roll to his side. He understood immediately, pulling us both onto our sides, our bodies still pressed tightly together. Our lips met again as our hands traveled and explored each others bodies. Boldly, I brought my hands to the top of Edward's boxers, running the tips of my fingers against the soft skin of his abdomen and scratching my nails through the light trail of hair.
"Edward?" I asked, separating our lips again.
"Hmmm?" he groaned as his hand cupped my breast, his thumb moving softly back and forth against my responsive skin. I shivered, the sensation of his fingers exploring my body so overwhelming that it was almost too much to bear.
"I want to touch you," my voice so quiet, despite my confidence, I didn't know if he could even hear me. "Will you show me how?"
Every time Edward and I've been intimate, he never let me pleasure him, it was always about me. Not that I was complaining, but it wasn't fair to him. I wasn't sure why he wouldn't let me. It couldn't be comfortable having to walk around with something that hard in his pants. This morning, it was going to be all about Edward.
His breathing picked up and I think a whimper might have found it's way out of his mouth and something that sounded like 'oh my God'.
Edward moved my hand away from his stomach and just when I was about to protest, thinking he was yet again going to stop me from touching him, I felt the bed and Edward shifting next to me.
Quickly, he took my hand, his fingers sliding in between mine, the pads of his fingers resting against the inside of my palm.
Suddenly, I felt my hand come in contact with something that was simultaneously soft and hard. I gasped, obviously knowing exactly what it was I was touching. Even though our hands were connected, he let me explore his skin. I trailed my finger tips gently up and down him, eliciting quiet pants of rapid breaths from Edward. I hadn't expected it to feel so... soft, like silk pulled tightly over warm metal. I rested my forehead against his chest as he ran his fingers up and down the bare skin of my back. His breathing was heavy and I could feel his heart pounding against my forehead. He wrapped our hands around him and slowly, he started pumping our hands up and down, squeezing my hand and showing me just how much pressure to apply. I was in awe of the way his skin moved under my hand in perfect rhythm with the sounds coming from his mouth. Before I knew what was happening, he removed his hand from mine, letting me do all the work. The hand that had been caressing my back, now found its way into my hair. He played with the strands, tugging gently.
I continued to pump my hand up and down, just as Edward had showed me. I brought my hand up and over, my palm gently running across the head, a sticky substance coating my skin, before wrapping my fingers around him again. This elicited another primal growl from Edward, the sound coming from deep in his chest.
"Fuck, you have no idea how good that feels," he panted, the hand that was placed in my hair pulling gently so I would lift my head upwards. He pressed his lips to mine in a forceful, rough kiss, as his hips bucked against my hand. My heart beat faster and my confidence soared from his words. I was making him feel good.
He grunted against my mouth, his breathing fast and heavy, before abruptly pulling away. A long moan that sounded a lot like 'oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck'tumbled out of his lips as he placed his hand around mine, effectively stilling my movements. I felt him twitch underneath my hand and the warm sticky substance coated my fingers. I tried not to be grossed out, but the texture was overwhelming.
"Hold on a sec," Edward told me, sensing my discomfort. He shifted on the bed and suddenly my hand was covered with a cloth, my fingers being wiped clean. "I'm sorry about that."
"It's okay." It really was. It was more than okay. Imade Edward feel good. My body and heart was on the most beautiful kind of high.
As soon as our hands were clean, Edward pulled me to him, cuddling me to his chest. I shivered, I was still naked except for my tiny scraps of material that passed for underwear. Without having to ask, Edward pulled us back underneath the covers. I sighed in contentment from the warmth and feeling of Edward's skin and the silkiness of the sheets.
We lay in bed for a while longer, just cuddling, kissing and chatting about nothing in particular. Neither of us brought up the discussion from last night about Edward and his two fathers. Which was okay by me. I didn't want to ruin this perfect morning by talking about something that was so clearly stressful for Edward.
Eventually our stomachs demanded food so we had to get dressed and make our way into the kitchen. Edward made me breakfast before deciding it was probably a good idea to take me home. I reluctantly agreed, not wanting my time with Edward to end. Part of me was also dreading facing Emmett and Rosalie. I'm sure Emmett would demand answers to about 120 loaded questions as soon as I walked in the door. I hadn't told them I was staying the night at Edward's last night, though I was positive they knew where I was. Surprisingly, I never received a phone call from Emmett. I'm sure that was Rosalie's doing. I'm sure she yelled at him every time he tried to check on me. I loved her more than words could describe and would need to figure out a way to repay her.
:-:-:
"Well, well, well, look what the cat dragged in," Rose teased as I opened the front door. Edward had just dropped me off, walking me to the door and kissing me goodbye. The way he was always so reluctant to leave me made my heart stutter. He was so adorable and sweet.
I shrugged my shoulders as I made my way to the couch, touching the back of it before sitting down comfortably, a small smile splaying across my face.
"Well don't you just look radiant," she mused, her voice playful as I shrugged my shoulders again.
"So, how was dinner?" she asked, her voice suddenly next to me as she moved to sit closer to me on the couch.
I sighed. "It was good. A few unexpected turn of events, but overall it was nice."
"Unexpected turn of events?" Rose questioned, her voice unable to hide her curiosity.
I quickly gave Rose the run down of the previous night. I told her everything from my disappointment in Carlisle's out right disregard for Edward's feelings, to him not even being Edward's biological father. By the time I was done re-telling my tale, I was just as exhausted as I had been after living through it. Rosalie listened with patience, though I'm pretty sure she wanted to go hunt down Doctor Cullen and castrate him due to the accusations he made about me. I had to calm her down and tell her that Edward and I had talked about that and everything was okay...for now at least.
"So you decided to stay at Edward's last night I take it?" she asked and I could instantly hear the smile in her voice.
"We were both so exhausted. I didn't want to make him drive me all the way back here," I replied with a shrug of my shoulders.
"Uh huh, cause it's so far," she teased.
"How angry was Emmett?" I asked hesitantly, biting down on my lower lip.
"He wasn't angry per say, more like anxious and worried. You probably should have called us. But I get it: you're an adult and need your space. It's just hard for your brother to realize that you aren't some helpless little girl anymore."
"I know that. I probably should have called, but to be honest it didn't really occur to me. I was just so exhausted," I replied, sighing and leaning my head against the back of the couch.
"I know that. I told Em that you're a big girl and you can take care of yourself. You wouldn't believe what I had to do to keep him from driving over to Edward's."
I made a face, definitely not wanting to know what it is that she had to do to reign my brother in. "Yeah keep that to yourself. I do not need to know."
Rose laughed and I could practically envision her rolling her eyes at me.
"So... you stayed the night at Edward's...," she hedged, obviously looking for the dirty details of my night with him.
"Yes, it was very nice," I answered vaguely.
"Nice?"
I sighed exasperatedly. "What do you want, Rose? A play by play of the entire night and morning?"
"The night and the morning?" she asked, the tone of her voice a mix of surprise and teasing.
"Get your mind out of the gutter, Rose," I told her laughing.
"So you're telling me nothing happened?" she asked
"I didn't say that...," I hedged, feeling my cheeks warm as I thought back to this morning.
"Isabella Marie Swan! Spill it!"
"Rosalie, it's private!" I exclaimed. I loved Rosalie, and generally told her everything, but the physical intimacy that Edward and I shared, I wanted to keep between Edward and myself.
"Alright, alright," she relented, a disappointed sigh slipping from her lips. "Just remember, I'm here if you need anything."
I chewed on my lower lip for a moment, wondering how to bring up the question I'd been dying to ask for the last week or so. "Actually there was something...,"
"Oh?" Rosalie asked, her tone instantly switching from disappointment back to curiosity.
"I was wondering about...birth control...," I whispered, slightly embarrassed and unsure why. This was Rosalie I was talking to. Maybe I was just nervous about her reaction to the fact that I'd been thinking about sex. But, I was 22 years old after all. I have hormones just like everyone else. My hands fidgeted in my lap as I waited for Rosalie to speak.
"What about it?" she asked gently, obviously noticing how nervous I was.
"I don't know. I was just thinking maybe I should be on some kind of birth control... ya know... for the future."
"Have you and Edward been talking about having sex?"
"No!" I exclaimed, shaking my head. "No we haven't. But I have been thinking about it..."
"Don't be embarrassed, Bella. It's just me. You know that whatever we talk about stays between you and me," Rosalie assured me, and I knew that it would. The last thing she would want to do is have Emmett find out. He'd go ballistic, locking me away in a dungeon some where before ripping Edward's privates off. "I'm glad you're thinking about it and being responsible. Just call and make an appointment with your doctor. I'll go with you and we can ask about appropriate options for you."
I nodded my head, agreeing with Rose. That sounded like a good idea to me.
"You can ask her any questions you might have about sex to, ya know? I'm sure you have a a ton..."
"I do. I mean, of course I do! But I think that I might be more comfortable just asking you." I laughed, nodding my head. I wasn't completely naive, but still completely inexperienced. If someday Edward and I were going to take our intimate relationship even further, I wanted to be as prepared as possible. I also knew that I had to have the dreaded conversation with him about any past relationships. He'd still never brought it up and I was still too afraid to ask. I'm no idiot. I knew that he'd been with other girls and I was positive he wasn't a virgin. But, I was at war with myself. I wanted to know, because that was the responsible thing, but another part of me didn't want to know anything about his past relationships. I was too afraid that I didn't measure up to whatever he had in the past. I was afraid that he would eventually get tired of my inexperience. I was positive that bringing up any of his past relationships would cause him to automatically compare me to them, and I just couldn't handle that.
Shaking my head and clearing my thoughts, I brought myself back to the conversation with Rosalie.
"Thank you Rose, for everything. Really. I owe you big time for keeping Emmett under control."
She laughed in agreement. "Yeah ya do, but don't sweat it. I love you. He'll get used to you being an adult soon."
"I know he will," I sighed, thinking about how proud I was of Emmett and his restraint, "I need to get ready for work. I'm going out with Alice afterwards for coffee. Did you want to come? She wants me to help plan a birthday party for Edward."
"Sure that sounds like fun."
:-:-:
The few hours I spent at work were entirely uneventful. It was pretty much a typical afternoon filled with story-times and activities for the children.
Shelly had approached me about helping out at the Special Olympics held by one of the local elementary schools every summer. I'd helped out three previous summers and was very excited about doing it again. I had roped Rosalie and Emmett into helping the past and was already thinking of ways I could get Edward involved as well. I was so sure that he'd love it. I was hoping I could get him to put on a little concert for the kids. I knew they'd love that. It wasn't taking place until August, right before the kids went back to school, so there was still plenty of time to get other people involved and plan all the activities. I wondered if I could possibly get Alice and Jasper to help as well.
Rosalie picked me up from the library promptly and we headed over to Starbucks to meet with Alice.
Alice was her usual chipper self. I was somewhat scared to be around Alice when she had any amount of caffeine in her system. I couldn't imagine her having any more energy than she already did. Of course, she felt the need to apologize for her fathers action's and she told me how sorry her mother was too and that despite the situation she hoped I would come back again soon. I told Alice that everything was fine and that Edward and I had talked about it last night before we went to sleep. Alice was very happy to see that Edward finally explained to me the entire situation with their father. She seemed very relieved by that fact.
We chatted idly for a while, continuing to get to know each other. I told Alice and Rosalie about the Special Olympics and both were eager to participate in any way they could. I asked Alice if she thought Edward would be interested in helping and she said without a doubt he would. 'Don't you know by now Bella, that he would do anything you asked of him?' she had said, causing my heart to flutter quickly and a smile to stay plastered to my face.
It wasn't long till we had Edward's birthday party planned out. It wasn't going to be anything outrageous, just a small gathering of Edward's friends and family, held at Alice and Jasper's place. Alice was going to take care of all the decorations and the food, while my only job was to make sure Edward actually turned up. I didn't understand why he was so against having a birthday party, but Alice explained that he was always like that. He hated fusses being made over him. She didn't understand it either, however, it didn't really matter because Esme and Alice have always made a big deal about it regardless of how he felt.
I found myself getting very excited about it and I hoped that Edward would be to. The only thing that made me slightly nervous was the thought of what sort of present I should get him. I wanted it to be special and show him just how much I cared about him, since I didn't have the guts to tell him outright how I felt.
Once all the party details were ironed out, Rosalie and I headed home to get dinner started, so that Emmett's bear-like appetite could be satiated.
Thankfully, Emmett didn't give me too much trouble about staying the night at Edward's. Once again, I had Rosalie to thank for this. I was honestly very proud of Emmett for making such a conscious effort to trust me and to get to know Edward. I was so happy to see that they were becoming such good friends. Nothing made me happier than the possibility of Edward fitting in with our little family.
After dinner was finished, I headed into my room to relax, unwind and just be by myself. The last two days were incredibly overwhelming and exhausting. I picked up my violin, realizing that it had been several days since I'd been able to play it. Music had been floating around in my head for the better part of a week, reminding me of Edward, and I was anxious to play the notes out. I hadn't played much recently, so my fingers were a little stiff at first, but quickly fell into a natural pattern along the fingerboard, the bow moving lightly over the strings.
I'd always loved playing music, and easily lost myself in it. Learning to play had been my grandmother's idea. She wanted me to have something that I could feel confident about, a talent and a hobby. Much to my surprise, I had been a natural. I learned to play by ear, my music teacher incredibly skilled in working with the visually impaired. My grandmother sought this teacher out, paying her more money than was probably necessary. But it worked. I instantly fell in love with the instrument, and being a natural helped my self-esteem. I learned to play during a time where I was having difficulty dealing with my blindness and I had longed to just feel 'normal'. Thus, my grandmother came up with the brilliant idea for me to learn an instrument. I randomly through out the idea of a violin and within a week she had bought me one and signed me up for lessons. Growing up, I played in several concerts and recitals, but didn't do it so much anymore. Now, it served as something relaxing, something to get my mind off the rest of the world.
Suddenly, my thoughts and playing were interrupted by the shrill ringing of my cell phone. My instinct was to be annoyed, but then I recalled that very few people actually called me on the phone, two of which were currently in the living room of my house, and one I saw two hours ago. So that could only mean one other person...
"Hello, beautiful," Edward's voice crooned as I answered the phone. I simply couldn't help the smile that spread across my face just from the sound of his voice. "How was your day?"
"It was good. I went to coffee with your sister and Rosalie. We have some very special things planned for your birthday."
He groaned, "God, I can only imagine. I don't know why Alice likes to torture me like this."
"Oh stop, you big baby. It's going to be really fun. I, for one, am looking forward to it. Why wouldn't we want to celebrate the day you were brought into this world? I think it's definitely something to celebrate." I giggled and I could hear a small sigh escape his lips.
"Well, if you are excited about it, then so am I. As long as you're going to be there, that's all I need."
The line went silent for a moment, before Edward whispered ever so softly, "I missed you today."
My smile grew impossibly wider at his admission. "I missed you too"
We spent another couple minutes talking about our days and I told him about the Special Olympics. He seemed slightly nervous at first about helping out, but, just as Alice had predicted earlier, he said he would do anything for me and go anywhere I wanted him to go. My heart beat fast in my chest at this admission. Could it be that he felt the same intense emotions for me as I did for him? I was excited that he would be involved in something I was so passionate about and couldn't wait to start planning activities for us both to enjoy together.
It was beginning to look like Edward would be a permanent fixture in my life, for what I hoped was forever, and I couldn't even begin to articulate or get a grasp on the amount of happiness that gave me. Finally, the pieces of my life were starting to fall into place and it seemed finally worth living.
A/N: So what should Bella get Edward for his birthday? =)
p.s. Chapter 15 probably wont come a quickly. I graduate in 3 weeks and things are getting crazy. Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to read and review my little story. I appreciate it more than you all know.