BOOOOOM!
A black wall was blown apart by Keldeo's Focus Blast.
No matter what we say or do,
Keldeo activated his Secret Sword and swung it, causing the screen to burst.
It's never up to me and you,
Victini rose into the air, his ears glowing with the power of V-Create.
We smile now and sing a cheer!
Keldeo and Santa Paws screamed in horror as huge burst of dark purple energy erupted in front of them.
Ghost Pony Rider roared.
Kyurem and Cryogonal the Critics both screamed as a zombie Lucario with a chainsaw appeared on their TV.
Keldeo screamed in horror, but sprayed himself with water to snap out of it.
Imperator Justinian was seated behind a desk in his study, with Keldeo standing on the other side.
The show must go on!
"FORESHADOWING!" Munna exclaimed.
"NO SHIP, SHERCLOCK!" the Intoxiquer shouted.
"SPOILERS!" Zorua exclaimed.
The show must go on!
Jack Storm sprung awake in shock.
Matthais Unidostres and BrickBrony1894 bro-hoofed.
Meloetta sat down with Madoka the Fennekin and Damian the Meloetta on either side of her.
A Greninja stood ominously next to a Lucario with red Aura.
Keldeo and Ryan the Lucario fought on a cliff top, Secret Sword and Bone Rush clashing over and over.
Never fear . . .
Button Mash and Sweetie Belle bonked heads as they tried playing Wonderbolt Free Fliers.
Keldeo burst out of the ice encasing him in an explosion of light.
The show! Will! Go! On!
Keldeo reared up on his hind legs, his expression serious and his Secret Sword raised and glowing brightly.
Keldeo the Critic
Season 4 Episode 4: Goodbye Pikachu, I'll miss you byTheShinyEevee
tinyurl: oy4yksg
"It's me, Keldeo the Critic. I review it so you don't have to . . ." Keldeo said glumly.
Keldeo scowled and said "More like, I read it so you didn't have to! and you don't wanna read this one! I mean, when I reviewed Pikachu's Girlfriend by Father Hulk, I thought I had seen the laziest, most stupid, most illogical fanfic that was ever written . . . well, okay, Vegeta at Jubilife was way worse, but that was a crossover troll fic. Look, the point I'm trying to make here is that Pikachu's Girlfriend was bad and I didn't think I'd ever find something worse."
"So, anyway, then I found this fanfic."
Goodbye Pikachu, I'll miss you
By: TheShinyEevee
Me, ash, Serena, Clemont and Bonnie are walking in the woods, it's very late and everyone's getting tired, we stop to sleep for the night, I wake up alone, I look around and find a note from ash saying ive been abandoned, How could he do this to me? Why did he do that? Doesn't he love me? I guess I'll find out by reading this book. CHAPTER 5 RELEASED!
"Now, I wasn't expecting a masterpiece. I just thought it would be like a retelling of Pikachu's Goodbye only in the Kalos region during Pokemon XY. I figured it would be just something quick to look at, maybe they'll be a few sweet moments, just something nice."
Keldeo's eyes widened, "But what I saw . . . Oh my gosh. . ."
"Well, we start off the story from Pikachu's point of view."
Me, Ash, Serena, Clemont and Bonnie were walking in the woods, it was getting pretty late out but Ash was anxious to get to Santalune city for his first gym battle, I've been traveling with him for so long but I never understood the concept of gym battles.
"WOW! The first sentence of the fanfic and it already fails! Not even Pikachu's Girlfriend started out with as little clue as this fanfic! How does Pikachu not understand the concept of gym battles? That's like having Yugi Moto not knowing how or why you shuffle a deck of card, or having Slappy the Slap Happy Squirrel not understanding the point of slapstick! You got the first detail about your main character completely wrong!"
"So, our heroes stop to make camp as they usually do."
Bonnie had nothing to do so she just pet us and fed us, at some point Bonnie whispered something, she said," I'm gonna miss you." I didn't understand why she said it but I didn't question it.
"Alright, now we have the beginnings of a plot. Bonnie seems to know what's going on. Maybe she'll play a big role in this story!" Keldeo said excitedly.
Lex Luthor: "WRONG!"
Keldeo pouted.
After 30 minutes of setting up, everyone was tired enough to sleep for a year, so we all settled down into are sleeping bags and went to bed, except for me and dedenne of course, dedenne fell asleep in Bonnie's purse and I fell asleep next to Ash.
In the morning I woke up and no one was there except for me, even all of the stuff was gone, I had no clue what was happening but I knew it was something, I looked around and found a note under a small rock, it's a good thing Ash thought me to read or I wouldn't have known anything,
Keldeo huffed and turned away, "Alright. Fine. Sure. Ash taught Pikachu how to read. Okay. If you say that's what happened, then who am I to argue. All is well. Carry on. Whatever."
the note went like this:
Dear Pikachu,
Im sorry but I had to abandon you, don't come looking for me, it is for your own good.
Ill miss you,
Ash Ketchum
Keldeo was filled with wide eyed intrigue. "Okay, this is actually kind of cryptic. I wonder what the problem could be? What is it? I gotta know!"
"Okay, so in the next scene we have . . . Pikachu catching up with Ash? That fast? Really?"
I found his footprints and ran toward them as fast as possible, in about and hour I saw ash, but no one else was with him, I ran up to him and yelled,"PIIIKAAAA."
He then looked back shocked," Pikachu, I told you not to follow me."
"Pika?" I said in confusion.
"Go back Pikachu, now."
I didn't listen to him, instead I ran up closer to him and jumped on his shoulder. "Pikachu! No." He said, then he pushed me off and said," I'm sorry, I have to do this." Then he took out a pokeball, I didn't understand why because I knew I could beat Froakie and Fletchling easily but then I noticed a lightning bolt sticker on it, this was my pokeball."I'm sorry Pikachu but I have to do this, Pikachu return." Then the pokeball opened and a red light shot out of it, it was so fast I couldn't dodge it and just like that, in the pokeball I go.
I tried to shake out but all I did was move the pokeball. After that Ash said," I'm sorry Pikachu, but I have to do this, it's for your own good." Then he threw the pokeball and I went flying, I could tell where I landed, I landed in between 2 branches and I was stuck, I tried to force the pokeball out because I knew the force when it hit the ground would open it for sure, after 5 hours of non stop doing this I gave up and fell asleep.
Keldeo sighed, "Okay, I hate to pick on every little bit, but bad fanfiction has to be understood if it's not to be repeated. . . which I'm pretty sure this fanfic is gonna do a lot of anyway. What's with all the time skips? How does Pikachu even know how much time has passed? In there a clock in that Pokeball or something?"
Then out of nowhere, probably around 6 hours into my sleep I fel. The ball shaking, it automatically woke up, then the ball fell out of the tree hit something and landed on the ground, I heard a female voice say," OWWWWWWW!?"
"Okay, so Pikachu seems to have just a met another character. I wonder who."
Im walking in the woods, it's just me and fenniken, I've just started my Kalos journey and I plan on going to many more regions after, I'm on my way to Santalune city for something they banned a long time ago, they finally brought back Pokemon contests, I had a plan and everything, I was gonna sign up as a coordinator and as a Pokemon trainer, so I would go to a town with a Pokemon contest, dominate, win and take on the gym, I knew it wouldn't be that easy but that's how I always dreamt of it going down like that.
Keldeo blinked. "Huh? What happened? Did we just change point of view to some random character? I mean, this is the next chapter, and there's nothing wrong with changing view points to show another character's side of the story. But the problem here is that the story doesn't say that the point of view changed. All that we needed was this:"
Myra's POV
"There! Was that so hard?!" Keldeo exclaimed.
I turned around to my fenniken, it was a male which I didn't quite like, I was planning on only catching females,
"Well that's kinda sexist."
but i wasn't gonna go on and abandon it, that would be cruel to just abandon a Pokemon like that, I had a bond with it I knew I could never have with any other Pokemon so I couldn't just trade it away either,
Keldeo smiled a bit. "Well, that's actually kind of sweet."
I would just have to deal with it, I couldn't think of any names so I just called it Fen.
Keldeo frowned and tossed his hooves in desperation, "Well that sure killed it!"
"So yeah, the Pokeball lands on her head and she ends up releasing Pikachu. But I can't help but wonder, how well did Ash think this threw when he tossed the Pokeball in a random direction. I mean, Pikachu got lucky here. He could've been stuck in that Pokeball for a long time. But then again Pokemon pop out of Pokeball themselves all the time in the Anime, like Chespin and Psyduck, so maybe I'm just over-thinking about this."
I picked it up and pushed down the button, it opened and revealed a Pikachu that was crying? I wonder what could have happened to it?
"So then we switch back to Pikachu's point of view without any notice. Annoying," Keldeo commented.
Yes, I'm finally out of my pokeball, I need to get to ash... After crying for 10 minutes with emotional support from this fenniken and it's trainer, I run away from them as fast as possible, with the fenniken and it's trainer screaming at me to not run away and ignoring it as much as possible,
"Yeah, imagine having someone cry for 10 straight minutes and then suddenly running away at top speed. Who is he, Spongebob Squarepants?"
I'm off to Santalune city, but where is Santalune city, and how do I get there?
I look around but I don't see any signs pointing to the city, but maybe that girl was going there, I just had to find out. I ran back to where I found them and surprisingly, they were still there. I ran up to the fenniken and talked to it," Hey... Where are you guys going?"
"Oh, Santalune cities where we're off to."
"Mind if I come along fenniken?"
"It's her choice not mine, and please, call me fen."
"Well, how do I ask her?"
"Allow me," Fen then turned to his trainer, he tugged at her jeans and she turned around, then fen pointed at me, then at the path ahead.
"Are you saying you want this Pikachu to come with us?" D***, right on the tip of my nose.
"Why is Pikachu swearing? Just why?" Keldeo moaned, "And that sentence didn't even make any sense. Right on the tip of his nose? What's on the tip of his nose? What's he talking about, I don't even-."
Then Fen nodded." Okay... Off we go." and with that we were off.
"Okay, so the adventure begins, I guess. But first, we get what has to be the worst author's note you will ever see."
AUTHORS COMMENTS
YES IM FINALLY UPDATING THIS STORY, BEING 2 CHAPTERS OFF FROM THE END I THOUGHT ID TRY AND FINISH IT ALREADY AND GET THE WHOLE STORY UP FOR YOU, THANKS FOR BEING PATIENT, AND NO IM NOT CANCELLING THIS STORY, THIS IS MY MOST POPULAR
Keldeo tried in vain to hold in his laughter. "This is you most popular- AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
AND IM SURE ALOT OF YOU HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR A WHILE FOR A CHAPTER, BUT I JUST FINISHED READING A STORY THAT HAS BEEN CLIFFHANGERED ALOT LONGER THEN THIS STORY, IT IS JUNE 4TH TODAY, IN 15 DAYS, THE STORY I JUST FINISHED READING WILL HAVE BEEN LEFT ON A CLIFFHANGER FOR... WAIT FOR IT... WAIT FOR IT... THREE YEARS, REDICULOUS RIGHT, ANYWAY THE STORY IS CALLED PILOT LIGHT, IT IS A POKEMON STORY THAT IS VERY INTERESTING, SO GO READ IT, AND WHEN YOU'RE DONE, LET'S TRY ANY GET THE WRITER TO CONTINUE, IT'S AN AMAZING STORY.
"Wow. I don't think I ever had another fanfic advertised to me within a fanfic," Keldeo said in shock, "I mean, how do you advertise another story inside a story? It just seems so wrong! Imagine if people did that somewhere else!"
Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash and Rarity are crying hysterically about Tank's hibernation.
Twilight Sparkle: Look, everypony, I know how hard it is to say goodbye—
Rainbow Dash: It's alright.
Applejack: You think she's done or just getting a third wind?
Twilight Sparkle: I don't know... Rainbow Dash? Are you okay?
Rainbow Dash: I think so. I feel better. Really, I do. Thanks, everypony. I don't know what I'd do without you.
Rainbow starts tearing up again as she turns to look at Tank.
Rainbow Dash: Or him... Oh, Tank... I'm sure gonna miss you. . . .
Pinkie Pie suddenly smiles widely and turns to break the Fourth Wall.
Pinkie Pie:Ya know, this reminds me of an episode of another show where someone leaves! It's Summertime Blues from the Littlest Petshop TV show!
All the ponies stare at Pinkie Pie in utter shock.
Pinkie Pie: KA-CHING!
Suddenly, Ghost Pony Rider flew through the cloud wall and clamped his jaws on Pinkie Pie's tail, dragging her out of the house with him as she screamed.
"And another thing," Keldeo said, "I checked that other story out out, and it actually is a pretty good fanfic. Too bad I'm not reviewing Pilot Light by Tashojiri. That's a good fanfic. I'm reading this mess. And another thing, why is the author's note in all caps? It's like being yelled at by Princess Luna!"
I wrote the paragraph before, when I started working on it.
"And here's another weird sentence that's just . . . wonky."
WITHOUT FURTHER ADO, CHAPTER 4 OF GOODBYE PIKACHU, I'LL MISS YOU.
"WHICH I AM SAYING IN THE ROYAL CANTERLOT VOICE!" Keldeo shouted as loud as he could. He then started coughing and breathing heavily from the exertion.
We were sitting on a bench in Santalune city, waiting for ash, it had been 3 days since he abandoned me and not just a pokemon contest was coming up, but a tournament as well, so I knew he would stay here for the tournament, since the other cities were alot longer then 3 day walks. Anyway, I was sitting next to Myra as sad as ever since I'd been abandoned, and Fen was on Myra's lap, actually looking pretty excited.'What are you so happy about huh? What's so cool? I don't see anything cool,' I said to the Fenniken who was happy as ever on Myra's lap.
'Wow, way to be a buzz kill, I'm just excited about the contest tommorrow,' he replied, actually sounding pretty mad.
'Well what about the tournament, isn't that today?' I asked the now mad Fenniken I knew as Fen.
'No, I was actually pretty excited when I found out about it, you know, ready to fight,' replied Fen,'But Myra said we would only be attending it, not actually competing.'
'Well what are we waiting for?' I asked,' It's starting any minute now and Ash mi-'
'Wow, all I ever hear coming out your mouth is this Ash guy, isn't he the one that abandoned you? Why would you wanna see him?' Fen said, cutting me off completely.
'Yes, he did abandon me, but that doesn't mean that he's... Uh... Not still my trainer?' I replied, very unsure of myself.
'Thats exactly what it means, look, if someone abandons their Pokemon, it's not theirs anymore, it's the wilds,' Fen replied, with what I have to say is actually some wise stuff.
"Oh, if only I knew what you 2 were saying," Myra said, out of nowhere. I then got up and started walking to where I thought was the tournament dome, Myra got up and started following me, and so did Fen.
'Where are you going?' Fen asked.
'To find Ash,' I said,'Even if he had abandoned me, He's still my trainer.'
"Is this the author's best attempt at giving Fen some character? Is that really the author's best effort? I mean, he likes contests and battles, and he has an innate sense of wisdom . . ." Keldeo looked thoughtful for a moment. "You know, that actually sounds interesting. If the story actually went more in depth about Fen, then maybe-WAIT A MINUTE!"
Keldeo's eye were wide as he was hit with a sudden realization. "There are no Pokemon Contests in the Kalos region! There are Pokemon Showcases, but those are completely different! So either the author is calling Showcases Contests by mistake, or the author just didn't do the research."
"So Pikachu finally finds Ash who is. . . performing in the Contest?"
I was bored, Since I couldn't see or hear anything from the contest, So I decided to uncover my ears and turn around, It was the final round. Then I saw who I had been looking for.
I found Ash.
Ash was battling with the other Pokemon he had caught from the Kalos region
Keldeo shrugged, "Well, yeah, Ash has entered Pokemon Contests before in Diamond and Pearl, but why is he entering them in the Kalos region for?"
"Well, since Ash didn't even bother to tell Pikachu why Ash released him, you can imagine that he'd be more than a little upset."
I watched through the whole battle, That he had somehow managed to win without me.
Your not supposed to just Abandon a Pokemon Ash, Your supposed to Love and Care for them, Battle with them, Not throw them away like their some wild animal. I am done with all the waiting, I want my revenge!
I quickly lept down from where we were sitting, Jumping on the tops of empty seats left over by people who had already left. I finally reached the ground of the stadium when I heard Myra yell something at me, What it was, I don't know... Did I care, Heck no.
I charged up a Thunderbolt, and hit it right next to Ash, As if to give him my attention, Then I lept at him,
Pikachu Punch!
"I love that meme!" Keldeo said with a smile.
When I collided with him he fell on the floor, As I continued to repeatedly scratch his face I didn't care anymore, About anything.
When I was done I had only just realized what I had done, I had hurt my friend... My best Friend, And I didn't even care how hurt he got while I was doing it. I was a monster... I quickly looked around, at the still hundreds of People and Pokemon who occupied the stadium, Then I looked at Ash, Who I had knocked unconscious.
"Wait a minute, how did you knock him unconscious? Your Thunderbolt didn't hit him, and all you did was scratch his face up a bit, which makes no sense, because you don't even know Scratch!"
I quickly ran out of the stadium, Some tears slipping out of my eyes.
Keldeo gave a sympathetic look and said, "Well, if it makes you feel any better Pikachu, none of this would have happened if Ash had just EXPLAINED!"
"So Pikachu runs and hides, feeling guilty about his emotional outburst."
He was in the hospital right now... Because of me... At least, I think he is.
Even if he wasn't, He would still be hurt.
"Calm down Pikachu, a few scratches aren't gonna kill him. And I'm pretty sure Ash will figure he kind of deserved it, depending on what the reason was for all this."
I heard someone calling for me... A female voice, Must be Myra.
I didn't get up, Or move, Or anything... I continued to cry until she found me, and picked me up. I didn't struggle to get out, Because, Someone to help me out is what I needed.
Keldeo looked pacified at this. "Myra may be light in the character development department, but we did get her dreams, aspirations, quirks, and values; albeit a little condensed. And we see her doing all she can to help Pikachu, a strange Pokemon she only just met. Yeah, Myra is a very good person. I'm glad to have her in this story. Maybe this is a sign that the story will get better."
Lex Luthor: "WRONG!"
Keldeo face hoofed.
She didn't talk the whole walk to wherever we were going, And Fen was in his Pokeball.
After 30 minutes of walking, With the only noise being Myra's shoes hitting the ground every time she took a step, And me sobbing, We arrived at our destination, And this is the last place I had wanted to go today... She probably knew that too... We had arrived at the hospital.
"Hey, hold on, why is Ash in the hospital?" Keldeo asked in confusion, "All Pikachu did was scratch his face! What, did Pikachu turn him into Two-Face? Is Meowth gonna come in and make him flip a coin to decide whether to shoot him or not?"
When we walked in she had walked over to the desk, and asked to see Ash. Of course the lady there was confused when she noticed me sobbing in Myra's hands, But she just let it go and directed Me and Myra to Ash's room.
"I don't ask questions. I only work here," Keldeo said sarcastically.
Ash was there, He was awake, and was still bleeding like crazy... He had probably lost a lot of blood since what happened, Since it did happen a few hours ago.
Keldeo had an incredulous look on his face, "Bleeding like cra- What is going on? The story said that all Pikachu did was scratch Ash's face, so how did he loose so much blood? Is the Pikachu Punch really that powerful? Come on, no one could scratch someone up that badly in such a short amount of time! And Pikachu doesn't even know Scratch! And why is he still bleeding! He's in a hospital! Shouldn't the doctors have fixed him up by now? Shouldn't he at least have a bandage on his face?"
Ash began to speak,"Hey, Pika-Chu."
He was definitely weak, If he struggled to say Pikachu.
Ash Continued,"P-P-Pikachu... I'm sor-ry for abandonin-g you Pikachu... I ne-ver shou-ld have."
"But why did you do it!" Keldeo shouted, "You're wounded in the hospital because of it, now is probably a good time to explain why!"
He's struggling more now... Could this mean something?
"Th-The doctors said... I would be f-f-f-fine in a couple of weeks."
I really hurt him that bad, Huh?
"You tell me," Keldeo said grumpily.
"S-So Pikachu... If you w-ant to go w-w-with this girl... Then pl-please do... If you st-ill want to co-me with m-e, Then ple-ase come to m-e."
Keldeo tapped his chin with his forehoof, "Okay, so I guess Pikachu has to choose. The girl who helped him when he was completely abandoned and betrayed, or the one who abandoned him and betrayed him without explaining why. I wonder who he's gonna pick?"
Portal 2 Announcer: "Sarcasm Self-Test Complete."
So now I have to make a Decision... I love Ash, I had been with him for years now... And because of that Pokemon that we saw from the first day of our Journey... He would stay 10 until he dies... And Myra... Myra helped me in my time of need, Even after I attacked Ash, She helped me calm down by patting my head during the walk... Ash... Abandoned me... Myra... Helped me... I know Who I'm going to pick.
I slowly make my way onto Myra's Shoulder, Showing Ash I had picked her...
Ash smiled,"You have a good time buddy... Ju-st know... I'll always love you..."
I couldn't help but shed a few tears... After that, Myra walked away, With me on her shoulder.
"Okay, so, yeah, we all saw that coming. But what bothers me is that all this could have been avoided if Ash explained why he did what he did. And if Pikachu really is leaving, then it will never be resolved! WE don't even know why Ash did what he did! Why did he do it!? Answer me, story! ANSWER ME!"
Ash's POV
Keldeo's eyes lit up. "Wow! The author actually acknowledged that we had a change in point of view! The author figured it out, guys! It's a miracle!"
I just lied to Pikachu... I lied about what was going to happen to me... I know he would've picked the girl... Because I'm pretty sure she helped him... After I abandoned him... And now, I'm paying the price... I have lost too much blood is what the doctor really said... And something was going to happen to me... But I didn't know what.
Beep
Beep
Beep
Beep
Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep
"He DIED!?" Keldeo exclaimed, "Are you for real!? This is almost comical. Like, it's a parody or something and shouldn't be taken seriously. Only it is taken seriously, and you should cry because of it."
"I mean, what, he gets a few scratches on his face and it kills him? Who is he? Silver Surfer on the NES?! And the author fails to realize that there are these things called 'blood transfusions,' unless we're supposed to assume that they didn't have his blood type on hand, which still wouldn't matter because there's no way he could have lost that much blood form a few scratches on his face. I mean, it makes no sense!"
Keldeo dug his hooves into the ground. "And you know what makes this even worse? We didn't even find out why Ash abandoned Pikachu in the first place. Yeah, that's right. That's the end of the story! That's the end!"
Keldeo stomped angrily and said, "Well you know what? I'm glad that's the end. This fanfic is stupid. It's stupid because it's-."
*Chapter 6*: Epilogue Part 1
WELCOME TO THE EPILOGUE OF Goodbye Pikachu, I hope you enjoy it!
Keldeo face hoofed hard. "Oh, please NO!"
Keldeo sighed and said, "Okay. Two part epilogue. Fine. I mean, maybe we'll finally find out why Ash abandoned Pikachu. . . or where Clemont, Bonnie, and Serena went! Anyway, it's not like this story can get any worse."
Epilogue part 1- What happened next?
Is this what death feels like... Pain all over... Nothing else... I heard a Voice...
"Ash," The voice began,"You have died... As all human's die... They are brought here, To heaven... If they are good humans... They get to stay... If they are bad... Then it is my choice on what to do with them... And I have decided your fate."
"Okay, I'm guessing this is Arceus. . ." Keldeo said slowly.
What's gonna happen to me?
"Ash, You have been both bad and good,
"Just like everyone else in all of Creation," Keldeo said with a nod.
You will not be sent to Giratina's hells,
"Giratina is not the devil! Did you even watch Giratina vs the Sky Warrior?" Keldeo exclaimed.
But you also will not stay here, In my heaven's... You will be brought back to your world..."
I-I get to live again?!
"But... You... Like some others... Will be turned into a Pokemon..."
Wait... What?
Keldeo sighed again, "Well, okay, it's basically a horrible version of Kevin and Buizel. But humans turning into Pokemon is probably kinda common in fanfiction. Nothing horrible here."
"The transformation is already complete... You will live as a Female Bulbasuar..."
FEMALE?!
"I have left you with a present as well... I hope you enjoy your gift."
Everything went black
Keldeo chuckled, "I must have read that wrong. I thought it said 'Female Bulbasaur.' But that would be totally insane-."
I woke up in some field, With 2 Pokemon looking at me... A Pikachu and a Fenniken, I didn't know who they were but I did listen on there conversation.
'What do you think it is?' The Fenniken said, A male's voice being used.
'It's a Bulbasuar,' The also male Pikachu began,'They're grass types, And Ash had one too, Just... It was Male, Not Female...'
I smiled, I was with Pikachu.
Keldeo tilted his head and nodded, "Mm-hmm, okay, so I didn't read it wrong, Ash turned into a female Bulbasaur, yeah, huh, no, it's good, it's very good, very good—You-you do a good job, you do a g-g-good job, TheShinyEevee, you know, you did good. I just so love it—everything, all the characters and everything about it was so good. . ."
Keldeo's began breathing heavily and his voice became harsher with a slight growl, "I just love it, it's so good. I just love your work, it's so good—everything; I love it! A combination species and gender swap…"
Keldeo suddenly went into his Resolute Form with a flash and brandished his Secret Sword, "YOU MANIAC! YOU DID IT! YOU BLEW IT UP! YOU-!"
Keldeo suddenly froze, he powered down his Secret Sword, and returned back to his ordinary form.
"Not worth it," Keldeo said calmly, "I mean. . . what am I supposed to say to this? I mean, this is total garbage. This is even worse than those old fanfics where Pikachu turns into a human girl. At least those were made when people were unsure of Pikachu gender and thought that he could have been a girl. But this fanfic deliberately takes a male character and turns him into a girl just to have one of the creepiest, most perverted romances since Friendship is Witchcraft! May the author's computer blow up!"
Suddenly the girl from the hospital came into view, She walked up to me.
"Hi girl... Wanna be one of my Pokemon?" She said.
This was the girl I left Pikachu with, Pikachu's new trainer... If I said yes, I could possibly be with Pikachu for a long time.
I slowly nodded as she bent down, A Pokeball in hand... "Okay... Get ready."
She lightly tapped the Pokeball on my head... And just like that, I was now her Pokemon, Able to be with Pikachu forever... And even communicate with him, This is all I could ever ask for. I guess abandoning Pikachu somehow turned out good in the end...
"But WHY!? Why'd you do it in the first place! what big, grand, huge, important reason did you have to create this terrible, awful, horrible story?!" Keldeo practically begged.
And the only real reason I abandoned him was because I didn't want them to capture Pikachu... I had just heard early in my journey, From Professor Oak, That before he gave Pikachu to me, He had some problems with 2 Raichu, I didn't really know why they were hassling him... But it turns out they had followed me on my whole journey, Weird right? Any way... I didn't want them to take Pikachu, So I released him...
Keldeo went dead silent. Then he said softly, "That's the exact same thing Team Rocket does. . . If you didn't release Pikachu because Team Rocket was following you, why did you decide to that because of a pair of stupid Raichu who are evil just because they're evil? You've battled Legendary Pokemon! Remember Tobias?! You seriously couldn't defeat two Raichus with alllllll your Pokemon? I mean. . . the only reason I'm not at all frustrated about this horribly lazy explanation right now is because the gender swap completely disconnected me from this story."
3 Month's later...
Ash's POV
It has been 3 month's since I had woken up as a Bulbasuar... A female at that.
"Why did that need to happen? WHY? And it's not even for PikaShipping! No, it's. . . ugh, just read it!"
The team had grown a little bit bigger, From just us 3, To 7 of us. Me, Pikachu, Fen, Waterfall the Female Marshtomp, Flame the Female Tepig, Elise the Female Emolga, And the one my instincts made me fall in love with, Leaf the Male Chikorita.
Leaf had been abandoned by his trainer... And we found out around A couple of days after we found Elise, That she was once a human, Who had died, Just like me, And She had abandoned Leaf.
Keldeo's jaw dropped to the ground.
"WHAT IN THE NAME OF BISCUITS IN EVEN GOING ON RIGHT NOW?! Does Arceus go around turning dead people into Pokemon? And what the hay are the odds of them finding another Pokemon that was a human? And was Elise a male before this? I wouldn't be surprised, this fanfic is so terrifyingly creepy."
A few minutes after that, I told Pikachu, That I was Ash, He didn't believe me at first, But after I persuaded him, Which took 2 weeks to do, He gave me a world of hurt... And I wasn't surprised at that.
I had evolved around a month ago, It was actually when Pikachu was attacking me, It didn't help me at all, Just gave him more time to hurt me... For keeping this a secret.
"Masochistic transgender- WHO WAS THIS MADE FOR!?" Keldeo exclaimed, "It's not for true Pokemon fans, it's incredibly insulting! It's not for Pokemon haters, it's terribly written and stupid! It's not even for those perverted Pokeshippers! I mean, the author is like:"
TheShinnyEevee: "Hey, hey, hey; did you perverts come here to see Ash and Pikachu together? . . . . . Well, *Dolphin Noise* you! I put Ash with some random Chikorita! There! Now I've alienated EVERYONE!"
Keldeo shrugged, "I'm done. It's just really dumb. It's bad. I just. . . stopped caring. They actually have eggs and. . .ugh, it's just. . ."
Keldeo stopped to think for a moment, and then said, "I can't really get upset about this story anymore because of how completely random and nonsensical it is. There's really no point to all this. Stuff happens for no reason and is not explained well. This was written without a single care, so why should I care?"
"Well, at least now the story is over. And this story is stupid. It's stupid because-."
*Chapter 8*: HALLOWEEN SPECIAL P1 SURPRISE fo y'all!
Happy Halloweek, Now here's the 1st part of a 2 part Halloween special for Goodbye Pikachu! The first part really isn't that spooky, That's why it's being released before Halloween.
"Oh, GOSH! JUST END!" Keldeo exclaimed.
Ash's POV
Me and Pikachu were talking, Talking about our mates, Leaf the Male Chikorita and Elise the Female Emolga. I'm glad Pikachu finally got over the fact that I was his trainer, and I abandoned him, and I kept that fact from his for such a long time.
Anyways, Elise was with Myra, who had gone and adventured away from our campsite. Leaf was taking care of our Young One, Yes, I had her... Veronica. It was actually just 3 weeks ago. It was an amazing experience. Hard... Painful and agonizing... but amazing.
"I hate this author so much!" Keldeo growled out, "Of all the sick twisted things to think of, I swear that gender swapping is the worst."
Pikachu explained to me yesterday that Pokémon don't really do anything on Halloween, Their trainers get candy and the trainers share it with their Pokémon. Of course, I hadn't done anything like that, Since I was never really into Halloween. It was a little too... Mainstream.
"I have no idea what that means. . ."
Fen and Flame were... I cant believe I'm about to say this, As usual... ******* each other.
They so desperately wanted a young one to call their own, It made me so sad to see them resorting to constant sex to try and get what they want.
"CURSE THIS STUPID STORY! I QUIT!" Keldeo practically roared, "I QUIT! I can't take it anymore! This story was rated K+! K+! The rating is a complete lie! I refuse to read one more sentence of this pile of garbage! This story doesn't deserve to get a full review! It's just. . . just. . .just so stupid! It's stupid because confusing. It's stupid because it's creepy. And it's stupid because its a psychotic middle finger to the entire Pokemon franchise! I mean, what kind of mind would think up a story like this. Ash could have come back as a normal male Pokemon. Or even better, he could have just not died from a couple of scratches! Myra, Pikachu, Fen, and Ash. . . and the rest of the heroes who mysteriously vanished, could have joined forces and fought the evil Raichus. But nope! Instead we got trash. Just total, total, trash! No wait, staring at garbage would be a better experience than this!"
Keldeo nodded and said, "And after taking a peek at TheShinnyEevee's author's page, it is quite possible that this person really is legitimately insane. She's completely insane! I'll say no more. Go and see the gibberish she wrote on her author's page for yourself if you want. I'm Keldeo the Critic, and I review it so you don't have to. You're welcome!" Keldeo then quickly left.
The End
Credits
Superman Returns
Animaniacs
Yu-Gi-Oh
Portal 2
Spongebob Squarepants: Sailor Mouth
Special Thanks
Bulbapedia
Mandopony