Booth rubbed his eyes and the back of his neck. He realized he'd been reading the same page in Jacob Broadsky's file for the last 30 minutes. His mind kept wandering back to the only thing he really cared about. He checked his phone again. It had been a little over a week since he'd last talked to Bones, and he still didn't know what her plans were. He figured she'd have to make her decision soon one way or the other, and the wait was killing him.

Dr. Zarubin had left for South Africa in a hurry the day after visiting Booth, according to Booth's contact at Homeland Security. Booth smiled to himself. It was probably a good thing Paul hadn't called his bluff. He knew it was unlikely that he would've had enough probable cause to arrest Paul, but it seemed Paul didn't know that, and he had gotten the hell out of Dodge. An admission of guilt, right? So one problem was taken care of, but the bigger problem was yet to be resolved: what was Bones going to do?

Booth looked through the file again, and checked his phone for the fifteenth time in the last twenty minutes. Concentrating was impossible. All he could think about was why he hadn't heard from Bones. He'd decided he wasn't going to call her, though. He wasn't going to beg. If she wanted to talk to him, she had his number. He was going to be strong and not cave in to his emotions. He was a grown man, for Christ's sake, not some lovesick teenager.

"Fine!", he thought to himself. "Fine! If she wants to fly across the ocean just to dig in the dirt with the nutty professor, that's just fine! I'm over it. I'm moving on. She can do what she wants. It won't bother me…."

"Booth?" Bones stood in the doorway, shyly waiting to be invited in.

God, what a beautiful sight! He tried to stay calm even though his heart was pounding. "Hiya, Bones." He motioned for her to come in. Staring at the file folder on his desk, he inhaled deeply
to steady his nerves. "Come to say good-bye before your big move?"

Brennan shook her head and studied Bobblehead Bobbie for a minute. She seemed unusually fidgety. "Actually, it occurred to me that I haven't discussed this major decision with my partner. We've always discussed this sort of thing in the past. I don't want to do anything that would damage our partnership in case we ever decided to work together again."

Work together again? Maybe that was hopeful. Booth shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant.

"What's to discuss? You're in love with Paul, so off to South Africa, right? There's not much else to add to that."

"I do find Paul to be physically attractive, and he can be intellectually stimulating when he's not drinking."

"That's great, Bones. I'm happy for you." Booth felt like he was going to throw up.

"Paul's also extremely petulant and childish when he doesn't get what he wants. He's been pressuring me to add a sexual component to our relationship, and I don't want to do so. I've seen how work romances can go. I don't think it's a good idea since we'd be working so closely together, but he can't seem to grasp that concept. He doesn't take my objections seriously. If he doesn't respect my reasoning on that, he may not respect my opinions on other things."

"Well, you're a beautiful woman, Bones, so I can see his point of view, but I understand what you mean about relationships between co-workers. You're right. He should respect your wishes." Booth sighed. Damn it. What did that mean for him and Bones?

"Paul is also extremely unreliable. He was here and gone in 24 hours. He didn't even tell me he was leaving. We were supposed to meet for lunch to discuss my plans and instead I got a text saying he was in Amsterdam. Can you believe that, Booth? He's quite inconsiderate."

Jesus...how was he going to explain that? Booth was a bit embarrassed. "Yeah, well...Paul's an asshat, and I don't like the way he treats you, you know, manhandling you like he did at the lab. He came to see me for advice about moving your relationship into the having sex level…."

"He did?" Brennan was not amused, and she could imagine Booth wasn't either.

"Yeah, and it made me angry, so I kinda threatened to arrest him if he didn't leave the country." Booth shrugged like it was no big deal, but truth be told, he knew he wanted his jackass rival as far away from Bones as possible.

"What? Why? Can you even do that?" Brennan was shocked. "I can take care of myself, Booth. I don't need any alpha male theatrics from you. Did you think you needed to protect me from him?"

"Not really. I know you can take care of yourself. I was acting in the best interest of the country. We don't need any more sex perverts here than we already have."

"Oh." Brennan wasn't sure how she felt about that. She realized that she almost preferred Booth being territorial about her, even though it wasn't rational at all. Brennan shifted in her chair slightly. "What I really came to talk to you about was the argument we had in my office the other day. I want to tell you something."

Here it comes. "Okay...you know I hate it when you start with that statement." Booth wasn't sure he wanted the conversation to go in that direction. "I guess we should just let it go, right? Let bygones be bygones?"

"No, Booth, we shouldn't. We need to clean the atmosphere. I want to apologize."

He almost fell out of his chair. Bones was going to apologize? "You mean clear the air? We don't really need to do that. I don't think you need to apologize for anything you said. You were right about a lot of it."

"No...I mean about going to Maluku. I want to apologize for that. I should've told you that I needed to take a break to think things through after all the stress I'd been under with the Gravedigger case and the changing nature of our partnership.. I wanted to objectively consider my life and what our relationship meant to me. Instead, I made you think I was running away from you after all the years we worked together, and that must have hurt you. I think I'm to blame for the problems we have now, and I'm sorry for that."

"You were running away from me, and I know why." Booth tried to avoid eye contact with Bones, but her eyes drew him in. "I was desperate that night to tell you how I felt. You were right when you said I pounced on you. I knew I shouldn't have rushed you like that and I did it anyway. I've spent many nights regretting how I handled that situation. If I had taken a different approach it might not have put so much pressure on you. But it wouldn't have changed the fact that I love you."

"Maybe I was scared, Booth. Brennan paused a few seconds. "Maybe I still am. I don't know how to handle all of the intense emotions that occur in me when I'm around you."

"Bones…" Booth reached over to clasp her hand…."I never want you to be afraid of me. I just want you to be happy." He glanced at the file on his desk, and then looked out the window, again trying to avoiding eye contact. "I'm sorry about Hannah. I was unhappy about what I thought was the end of my relationship with you, and she was willing to cheer me up, so I let her do that. When I left her in Afghanistan, I was upset because I thought it was the end of that relationship, and I didn't know what would happen with you...if you even wanted to work with me again. Hannah said she wouldn't come to DC, so when she went to all the trouble to move here anyway, I kinda felt responsible for her happiness, you know? I had committed myself to her, and couldn't go back on my word…."

"I know you love her…." Brennan pulled her hand away.

"Loved her...you're right, Bones, I did love her. That's in the past, and I can't change that. But what I felt for her is a drop in the bucket compared to what I feel for you. There's no comparison. Do you believe that? It's true...absolutely 110 percent true."

She smiled and started to correct him about 110 percent but decided to let it slide. "Maybe what you felt for Hannah is what I initially felt for Paul. I did research on the physiology of sexual attraction and brain chemistry."

"Of course you did." Booth smiled and nodded. Who else but Bones would research love?

"What we both experienced is called infatuation. In the human mind it mimics love in the release of chemicals that stimulate sexual attraction, but for some reason a long term bond can't be formed or sustained between the partners."

"Well, infatuation can sure mess things up between people. It seems to lead them astray from where they really should be." Booth smiled faintly. "I really hate that it led me away from you. I hope someday you can forgive me for hurting you so badly."

"I hope so, too. I think I've already started to forgive you, although it may take some time." Brennan looked at Booth as if she was imploring him to understand. "I do want a relationship with you…."

"I want you to take all the time you need so you can be sure about a relationship with me. I guess if you need to take a year in Johannesburg to forgive me I'd understand that. I might not like it, but I want you to be sure about things between us…"

A/N: Sorry to end on a mini cliffhanger here, but my mind's inspiration was threatening to write a chapter the length of WAR AND PEACE …..and no one want to read anything that long. This is the natural break in the chapter. More soon...