Sorry for the longer update time- I'm pretty sure it's the longest yet for this story, and I'm kind of bummed it took almost a week and a half this time, though I guess that's not very long. College has been keeping me busy with annoying things like essays and tests, so I've had less time :( Plus I went to a bunch of random events in the evenings this week (I won a section of a Harry Potter trivia contest) and I got to spend time with my family over both weekends so I didn't write much then. Normally I just camp out in my dorm room and have more time to write on the weekends, but these weekends were more fun, even if I didn't write much. So life's been busier than usual.
This story reached 100 reviews! I've never even gotten close to 100 reviews on any of my other stories and I love how some of you guys review practically every chapter. As usual, thanks to all my readers, favoriters and followers too. You all are awesome :)
Warning! Major spoilers for Avatar in this chapter (I really should've put that last chapter. There are spoilers for another movie, but revealing it would be a spoiler for this chapter). It should be obvious I don't own that (or Avengers or Disney or Peanuts) but I should probably put that disclaimer anyways. I don't think I have one in this fic yet, so here it is: I don't own any movie or comic strip that you would recognize!
This is sort of a filler chapter since a lot of it is the stuff that didn't fit in last chapter- and it ended up being pretty long.
Tony looks up from his breakfast and glances across the table at Loki. Instead of eating, Loki is plucking dry Cheerios out of his bowl and arranging them to make little pictures on the table. He makes a smiley face out of the cereal and then swipes a hand across them so they scatter slightly and don't resemble anything. Then he arranges them into a sort of blob that Tony can't make heads or tails of, and then some kind of animal.
It's a good thing Loki doesn't eat his cereal with milk, Tony thinks, because he suddenly flips his bowl upside down, spilling the contents. The Cheerios rain down on the tabletop and the spoon, upon landing, makes a loud clattering sound and sends a couple of the Cheerios flying. Loki giggles at the airborne Cheerios. He looks up at Tony, who's quirking an eyebrow, somewhat amused. Tony leans forward and flicks one of the Cheerios across the table at Loki.
"They're stars." Loki says, beginning to trace lines between the Cheerios with his finger as if making constellations. However, his tone is a bit more subdued than usual and his expression becomes nervous, as if Tony's suddenly going to lunge across the table at him.
Ever since their conversation under Loki's bed two nights ago, Tony's noticed that Loki's been acting more nervous around him. That nervousness had only increased after last night's incident while watching Avatar.
That had been a real screw-up on Tony's part. He'd thought Loki would like seeing another character like with blue skin- he'd reacted pretty well to Genie- but that hadn't been the effect Avatar had. If Loki had stuck around, he would have seen that Jake liked his blue avatar form more than his human form (admittedly part of that was because he could walk as an avatar whereas he was stuck in a wheelchair as a human). But Loki hadn't stuck around- he'd fled from the theatre convinced that Jake was hated for his blue form.
Tony had tried talking to him last night, after finding him crying under a table, but it had been clear that Loki had wanted some alone time. So Tony had left him alone after the failed attempt at talking to him.
He'd needed to comfort Loki during a nightmare last night, though. It had taken longer than normal and Loki hadn't leaned into his touch.
Loki has definitely been acting more nervous, Tony thinks again as he sips some coffee. It seems to be connected to their first conversation about Jotuns. Loki is clearly under the impression that it's natural to be hated for having blue skin, which was undoubtedly the reaction Asgardians had to his Jotun form.
So if Loki had seen more of the movie, he would have seen Jake actually prefer his blue avatar body over his usual body, which is what Tony had hoped Loki would take away from it. Maybe, Tony thinks, there's a way he can salvage the whole movie fiasco. Admittedly, he might end up totally spoiling it, but Loki doesn't seem to inclined to watch it anyways.
"You know," Tony says, sitting back in his seat slightly and making sure he has Loki's attention before continuing "In the movie last night, Jake actually chose to be in the blue form permanently. He was happier in that body." That was what he'd been hoping Loki would get out of the movie.
Loki laughs in disbelief- at least he hadn't flinched or screamed- and Tony speaks again., really hoping he's not screwing this whole situation up even more. But Loki really needs to understand this, Tony needs to make sure Loki gets the right message from the movie.
So he continues. "I'm serious. That's how it ends. Nobody hated him because he looked like that, and he was happier in that body." Okay, so he'd already said the part about Jake being happier in his blue body, but it doesn't hurt to repeat it. Loki hadn't gotten to the part where they'd shown that, after all. Admittedly, part of the reason Jake liked that body is that he didn't need a wheelchair in it.
"That's stupid." Loki mutters. Tony's not sure if he heard that right at first, since he's almost positive that this is the first time he's heard Loki say something's stupid. When Tony disagrees, Loki replies "Yes it is! That would never actually happen!"
Tony doesn't even bother pointing out that none of the movies they've watched have been at all realistic, since they featured talking animals, monsters, flying carpets... Actually, who knows, maybe they have flying carpets in Asgard.
"Okay, so it's going to be a while before we go to an alien planet and borrow the bodies of an alien race." Tony concedes, trying to lighten the mood a little, although he knows that's not what Loki meant when he said it would never happen. He quickly continues before Loki can reply. "But he wouldn't be hated for what he looked like."
"But they did hate him! They were all mad at him." Loki says, sounding confused and anxious at the same time as he picks Simba up from his spot on the table in front of the bowl and hugs him. There it is again. Tony had noticed last night that Loki seemed to think Jake was hated.
At least he's talking now though- last night, talking about it had seemed to be too much and watching it had definitely been too much. Perhaps the time in between last night and now made it easier to talk about the movie, when last night it had been too new? Tony's not sure, but he's glad they're talking, since the silence treatment he was getting yesterday didn't get them anywhere. After a bit, Loki speaks up as he strokes Simba. "They hated him and they beat him."
"What the hell?!" Tony exclaims, standing up out of his chair. Where had that come from? Loki looks at him worriedly, and Tony sits back down looking across the table at the god, hoping that didn't seem threatening, since Loki's already nervous enough.
Whoa there. Loki actually thinks Jake got beaten up in his blue form? Sadly, that probably shouldn't have surprised him, Tony thinks. That's probably what people in Asgard did to Loki.
Tony pinches the bridge of his nose and says "They did not beat him. Got that? It would have been horrible if they did."
"But they were mad." Loki says, as if that alone would justify it.
"They were more annoyed than mad. They didn't think he was ready to get up yet. But that's all they were- annoyed. Not mad. It had absolutely nothing to do with what he looked like." Tony offers as an explanation. Then, his tone becomes disgusted "And even if they were mad, it wouldn't give them any right to beat him."
Loki looks unconvinced. Does he think it's okay to hate someone for their skin color? Tony honestly wouldn't have pegged Loki as a racist, but... "How about this? If someone had, say, green skin, would people hate them? No, scratch that. Would people be justified in hating them?"
"Hulk-y has green skin." Loki answers. Tony hadn't even thought of that when he'd asked about green skin, he'd just made sure to pick a color other than blue. Loki nods to himself and continues. "Nobody hates him, nope nope nope. 'Cause he's a hero and people like heroes. Like you and Hulk."
"Actually, there are a fair number of people who dislike us." Tony mutters under his breath. It's rather surprising that Loki just assumed that people didn't hate the Hulk, Tony thinks. Then, to Loki, he asks "So if people hated Hulk for being green, would that be okay?"
Loki just shrugs, looking away, and Tony sighs.
"The answer is no, it wouldn't be okay." Tony fixes Loki with a look "Hating the Hulk for being green would be stupid, and nobody really hates Hulk because of what color he is." Admittedly, there are people who hate the Hulk because they think he's an uncontrollable monster, but Tony's definitely not going into that right now.
"There are people who hate others because of the color of their skin, but they're wrong to do so because there's no reason to hate someone for that." Tony takes another sip of coffee "We even have a term for those people: racist. People who hate someone for having, say, darker skin are racist. So why would it be any different because of any other color skin?"
Loki frowns in confusion and asks "So is 'racist' a bad thing?"
"Most people would say so. I personally think racist people are really stupid." Tony looks at Loki for a bit and says "Let's try this again. Would it be wrong to hate Hulk for being green?"
Loki bites his lip and cocks his head to the side. He slowly nods, though his expression is uncertain. Tony feels a small sense of satisfaction. At least they seem to be making some progress, since Loki seems to know the answer Tony wants to hear, even if he doesn't seem to get it. While that's not much, at least he hadn't said it would be okay to hurt the Hulk.
"Good. How about this- would it be okay to hate Jake- the guy in the movie last night- because of what he looked like? Or Genie?" Tony watches in dismay as Loki immediately answers that it would be okay. So much for making progress.
Tony sighs. How is he going to convince Loki that someone's appearance doesn't merit abuse? He'd been hoping Avatar would have a good effect, but it had quite the opposite. But there are other movies with that message, right?
Tony grins suddenly, knowing exactly what they're going to watch tonight.
If Tony's trying to make his life confusing, Loki thinks, he's doing a very good job. He's doing it too well, actually. He keeps saying strange things that are totally different from what everyone else says. It's like Tony takes everything he's ever known and turns it on its head so its the complete opposite of what makes sense.
Tony had started talking about the moving picture thing they'd watched last night, the one with the guy who'd had a hideous blue form. Loki hadn't wanted to talk about it, but Tony had kept going. Loki hadn't been able to help hearing Tony's words, and they made very little sense.
Loki had assumed that everything would be normal and make sense, that people would treat that blue guy like everyone treated him. But according to Tony, that wasn't the case. He'd said that the guy actually liked his weird blue body and chose to always look like that. Loki had thought Tony had been joking at first, but apparently he hadn't, which is so confusing. Why would that guy choose to look like a monster instead of staying in his normal-looking body?
Tony had said the guy- Jake, apparently- hadn't gotten a beating either. It's sort of relieving that Tony hadn't been watching Jake being punished for looking like that. The really weird part is Tony had acted like he wouldn't have wanted to see it. Admittedly, Loki thinks, he hadn't wanted to see it himself, but that's because it was too personal. Tony had also said that the scientists weren't mad at him, but even though they hadn't looked totally mad yet, they had looked annoyed and that always leads to anger. Besides, they had to hate him for looking like that.
But Tony had just said that that wasn't the case, either. So according to Tony, Jake liked his freaky blue form and wasn't hated or beaten for looking like a monster. It would be really nice if the world was actually like that. But Loki knows firsthand that it's not like that at all.
As if that's not confusing enough, Tony had said a while ago that Loki hadn't deserved to have his mouth sewn shut. Everything Tony's said has been the complete opposite of what Loki had always been told in Asgard. Loki groans. All this is making his head hurt.
Right now, Tony's giving him a strange look. He'd just asked whether it would be okay to hate Jake for being blue. The answer's pretty obviously yes (hating blue skin is natural) but Loki hadn't actually meant to say it out loud. Tony's acting like what he'd said was wrong.
Tony had said that hating the Hulk would be wrong, but that's kind of different because the Hulk's not demented, hideous blue creature, like Jake's other form in that moving picture, or Loki's own other form. Apparently there's some word, racist, that means hating people for their skin color or something. Which sounds like what Asgardians were like to him. But Tony made it sound like it was wrong, whereas everyone else knows it's right to hate Frost Giants.
Loki's not sure why Tony's giving him that you're wrong look, since he'd answered the questions correctly- people shouldn't hate the Hulk, but hating freaky blue people is common sense.
Tony looks at him with a strange, assessing gaze that makes Loki feel like Tony's rummaging through his thoughts. He ducks his head down towards Simba to avoid the the weird look those brown eyes are giving him. He starts arranging the circular things from his bowl again. He tries to make them look like a horse without much success. Close to a minute passes as Tony gives him that strange look.
"You know I don't hate you, right?" Tony asks suddenly, and Loki startles a bit. He looks up at Tony and blinks in surprise. He's not sure where that had come from and he doesn't know what to say in response. Tony doesn't seem to hate him now- he'd even said he doesn't hate him when asked- but this is the first time he's said it out of the blue.
Very slowly, Loki nods. Tony had just said so, after all. Right now it seems to be accurate, too, but that's probably going to change soon.
Tony's still giving him that assessing look. He suddenly gets up and moves around the table so he's next to Loki. Tony gently tilts Loki's head so they're making eye contact.
"I don't hate you, and what you look like isn't going to change that. I'm not racist." It's weird- Tony doesn't look like he's joking. "I'm not going to hate you for your powers, either." Tony continues. Loki frowns. He's not sure what his powers are, but it almost sounds like Tony's referring to his magic. But that's ridiculous.
"This isn't Asgard." Tony adds. "You're not going to be punished for those things, here. Got it?"
Loki starts to cry. What Tony's just said is way too good to be true. The idea of someone not caring about his magic or his horrible other form, of someone liking him despite those things, is too much to wrap his head around. Tony can't actually mean it. But he hasn't lied before, either, and he actually hasn't treated Loki any differently after finding out about his magic. Why does this have to be so confusing?!
Tony puts an arm around him and Loki relaxes slightly. He has no idea how long this crazy view of Tony's is going to last before Tony gives into common sense and starts being like everyone else. Even though Tony had just said he wouldn't hate or punish him for his magic or other form, Loki's not naive enough to believe it'll really be that way forever.
But it seems like he's just bought himself a bit more time of the amazing life he's had in Tony's tower, and Loki's going to take every moment of being inexplicably treated well that he can get.
Tony feels his eyelids starting to droop during their current movie viewing, which is Beauty and the Beast. Tony can't actually think of a movie that gives the moral of "don't judge others by their appearance" quite as well. (it also happens to be Bruce's favorite Disney movie, probably because both Beast and Hulk are misunderstood).
Admittedly, Beast doesn't look at all like a Frost Giant, but that might play in Tony's favor after the disaster with Avatar. Loki had reacted better to Genie than the Na'vi in Avatar, after all.
They'd spent the day in the lab, though nothing very eventful had occurred. Tony had finished designing some of the Hulkbuster weapons. Over the course of the day, Tony had noticed the green stuff around Loki's hands a couple times. Probably the most eventful thing that had happened was Loki making one of those other-Loki's and freaking out, and Tony having to calm him down.
Tony yawns as he stares at the screen, where Belle is singing her first song in the village, and his eyelids feel like they've turned to lead. Keeping his eyes open suddenly seems more difficult than fighting off a hoard of Doom-bots on his own. He's still really sleep-deprived, and his body decides that a nice, dark theatre would be a good place for an impromptu nap. Even with the sound of the movie and Loki bouncing and talking next to him, it's somehow easy to drift off within the first ten minutes of the film.
At first, everything is peaceful.
But then, he's back in Afghanistan, being forced under the water. His lungs fill with water and he can't breathe. His brain can't think about anything other than the lack of air as he struggles uselessly against the people holding him down. He spits out water when he's finally pulled out, but before he can regain his breath, they force him under again. The cables hooked up to the car battery that's powering the electromagnet in his chest shock him, only adding to the torture.
Tony wakes up screaming and thrashing around, not even noticing he's not in the cave. Someone's hand is on his shoulder. He flinches away from the touch and it doesn't return. His body is shaking and his breath comes out in short, quick gasps. For a while, his mind is solely occupied by the fact that he's struggling to breathe. Is he still underwater? No, he can't feel any water around him, and if he were underwater, he wouldn't be able to breathe at all. Okay, so he's not underwater, but is he still in Afghanistan?
As he sits there breathing rapidly, Tony hears Jarvis telling him to take slow, deep breaths. This can't be in Afghanistan- Jarvis wasn't there. Besides, there's a shot of Gaston playing on the screen in front of him. Jarvis' voice is soothing, and Tony slowly starts to calm down.
And then, Tony hears someone start singing softly, so softly he's not sure whether or not he's imagining it. Tony can't make out the words, but he's not sure if they're in another language or if he's just not making them out since the voice is so soft. The song itself is slow and peaceful, the sort of song people would imagine being in a pleasant dream.
Then, he feels someone touch him again. Two arms tentatively wrap around him and pull him into a hug, and the voice keeps singing softly. Tony's too tired to fight them off and his mind's still foggy with the remnants of the nightmare. Plus, his shaking body isn't exactly responding. For a couple minutes, Tony lays there, being comforted. There's a small part of him that sort of appreciates it, and he tries to squash that tiny part into oblivion.
Tony doesn't know how long it takes for his body to still and his breathing to even out, but eventually it happens. He tries to slip out from the embrace, but it tightens and he finds he's unable to. He growls in frustration. Who's hugging him, anyways? And why can't he get free? Somehow he can tell it's supposed to be a hug and not some kind of restraining hold, although it's currently acting like one.
He doesn't need anybody else to see him like this. Too many people have, already. In addition to Jarvis obviously seeing every incident he's had, Pepper had seen some of his nightmares back when they were still dating and she'd spend the night here. She always tried to talk to him about it and he always refused. Heck, even before Pepper, some of his one night stands had seen him having relatively minor nightmares (those night had always ended prematurely, and that was one of the reasons he'd stopped having one night stands).
Tony manages to turn his head around enough to see who's hugging him relentlessly. It's Loki. Of course. Tony feels incredibly stupid for not working that out earlier. Some genius he is, he thinks with an eye roll. Upon figuring out who it is, Tony relaxes marginally. Of all the people to see him like this, Loki's probably one of the best options. At least he understands what it's like to have nightmares, and Tony doubts Loki's going to think any less of him for it.
Loki continues to hug him and seems unaware that Tony's still trying to extract himself from the embrace. Or maybe Loki just doesn't care. He's still singing softly, and while Tony would never admit it out loud, something about the song itself is kind of nice.
"Can you let go of me?" Tony asks. It comes out a bit harsher than he intended, but he's still not happy with this whole situation. He really doesn't like being the one who's being comforted, either. Tony is still unable to wriggle out.
Loki stubbornly hangs on to him, to Tony´s annoyance. "No! I'm making you feel better. You hug me and it makes me feel better, so I'm hugging you. Hugs help!" Loki nods as if agreeing with himself and then continues singing the song where he'd left of.
"Well, I'm better now. Good job." Tony says. It's not really a lie- while he doesn't feel amazing, he does feel better now that he's no longer still in the grips of the nightmare. His shaking's subsided and his breathing's slowed down. He actually feels pretty normal now. Or rather, he would feel normal if Loki wasn't hugging him in that's probably supposed to be comforting but rubs Tony's pride the wrong way. Tony once again tries to slip out of the embrace. This time, Loki lets him, staring at him and fiddling with Simba's tail.
"I made you feel better, right?" Loki asks hopefully, though there's a faint note of something suspiciously like pride in his voice. "Like you do to me?"
If he says no, he's pretty sure Loki would start hugging him again, so Tony nods instead. Although being hugged in that reassuring way is something he's not exactly comfortable with, it's a rather refreshing change that Loki's not even suggesting he talk about the nightmare. At least for right now, Jarvis is remaining silent about the issue, undoubtedly because Loki is with them
After a brief period of silence, a sudden look of horror crosses Loki's face and he lets go of Tony. "Jarvis can't get hugs!" Loki says out of the blue, as if it's the biggest injustice in the world. To be honest, Tony's glad the attention's shifted to Jarvis instead of him.
"Indeed I cannot, Mr. Loki." Jarvis says, a touch of amusement in his voice. "I'm afraid that I'm not capable of giving them, either. You'll have to rely on Mr. Stark for that." He adds apologetically
Loki looks at the ceiling with wide eyes as he wrings his hands together. "Then how does Tony make you feel better when you're scared? You can't get hugs." Tony smirks slightly at how Loki automatically assumes he'd be making Jarvis feel better.
"That is hardly an issue, Mr. Loki." Jarvis says, with a tone that Tony can only describe as the verbal equivalent of an exasperated smile in his voice. Loki, however, doesn't get over the apparently great injustice of Jarvis not being able to receive hugs. The god actually goes over and hugs the nearest wall. Tony loses it at the sight of Loki hugging the wall. If Loki even notices Tony laughing, it doesn't seem to bother him. Meanwhile Jarvis tries to remind him that it doesn't matter and he'd never even been upset in the first place.
Still grinning, Tony gets up and gently pulls Loki away from the wall. "Jarvis doesn't need a hug, Snoopy."
"Everyone needs hugs." Loki says, looking at Tony like he's crazy. Then his voice lowers, and he mumbles "I never got any back there, except from... 'except from myself." Even Tony thinks that's sad, especially the mental image of Loki, scared and alone, having to hug himself because nobody else would. While Tony doesn't consider his childhood particularly great (thanks to his father, who only showed an interest in him because of his genius intellect), he at least has some memories of his mother hugging him when he was small. Tony puts an arm around Loki's shoulder and pulls him close. Tony's really not the hugging type, but with Loki it feels normal, probably because he's done it so many times to calm Loki down.
To ease Loki's mind, Jarvis says that Loki can sing to him instead of hugging him if the need ever arises, which leads Tony to ask what the song he'd been singing was.
"Oh, that!" Loki says excitedly, clapping his hands. "It's about horses running in the moonlight and I really like it!" He pauses and adds "I like horses too, but I didn't have one and nobody would let me ride theirs'. But sometimes I'd go to the barn, 'cause the horses were nicer to me. There's one right there." Loki points to the paused frame of Beauty and the Beast, which shows Belle riding a horse.
Tony tells Jarvis to start the movie again, and he watches Loki's reaction. Loki bounces, laughs, and talks as usual. He seems to love all the living objects (his favorites seem to be Mrs. Potts and Chip), but Tony's more of paying attention to his reaction to the Beast.
This movie is going way better than Avatar had. Loki almost seems a bit scared of the Beast at first (though the movie portrays him as meaner in the beginning), but like Belle and basically anyone watching the movie, he grows to like the Beast as the film progresses. Loki starts yelling at the villagers and Gaston when they go off to kill the Beast.
"You can't kill him!" Loki shouts, jumping out of his seat and flapping his hands. "He's nice!" To be honest, this is exactly how Tony was hoping Loki would react- that he'd realize that hating the Beast for his appearance is wrong.
"So he is," Tony starts, hoping he's not going to end up screwing this up. "But they don't know that, since they just look at him and assume he's a monster."
"But they're wrong! He's nice and Belle likes him but they're just gonna kill him?!" Clearly, Tony thinks, he should have shown Loki this before Avatar.
"Yes, they are wrong." Tony agrees. "It's wrong to hate anyone because of what they look like, even if they look like a beast, or if they have blue skin."
When Tony mentions blue skin, Loki just gives him another you're crazy look. But this movie is at least telling Tony that Loki understands on some level that it's wrong to hate someone based on their appearance. He hadn't been sure if Loki really understood that when asking whether it would be wrong to hate the Hulk for being green. But at least it seems he won't have to start from square one in getting Loki to understand that hating someone for their appearance is wrong.
However, whenever blue skin is added to the equation, it's like a switch has suddenly been thrown and it suddenly becomes okay to hate them. Tony's not sure how to convince Loki that blue skin isn't an exception to this. Avatar had been a flop at that, and while Aladdin had been slightly better with Genie, it still hadn't convinced him. What Loki can clearly see in Beast's situation- that it's wrong to hate him for his looks- he's unable to see in his own, or even Genie's or that Avatar guy's. Although it's not like one movie's going to solve all their problems.
Tony's already pretty satisfied with the effect that this movie has had, though, and it gets even better. By the end, when the Beast and all the servants transform back into people, Tony's sleep deprivation is once again taking over and he starts to nod off. But he's still alert enough to hear Loki murmur "Why didn't he stay all hairy? Belle still would've liked him."
He glances over at Loki to see the god's eyes are closed, and it's not long before he joins Loki in falling asleep in the theatre as the credits roll.
At some point during the night, Tony wakes up when he hears Loki having a nightmare next to him. Tony had been sleeping fitfully already, though at least he hadn't been having another nightmare like earlier tonight. He eventually calms the god down, but instead of staying up after it, Tony ends up falling asleep because he's still exhausted. In the morning, he wakes up to Loki running around the movie theatre playing some kind of game with Simba while Jarvis tries to quiet him down. Tony's feeling slightly more rested, but at least a small amount is more than nothing.
Tony's somewhat surprised- but glad- that Loki doesn't bring up his nightmare during Beauty and the Beast last night. Loki had acted like it was the most common thing in the world, and thus not even worth mentioning. Does Loki think everyone has those kinds of nightmares? Tony's not sure, but he doesn't bring it up. He just wants to forget about it.
Jarvis has been looking for therapists for Loki. He and Tony privately decided to tell them up front that Loki isn't from Earth so they won't take him thinking he's a citizen and find out that he's not. This way, they won't have to fake documents and possibly run into some issues when it becomes obvious that they're faked since Loki's not from Earth.
When Tony asks how it's going, Jarvis replies that he's found a few promising candidates and that he's called and emailed them. One has rejected them, and the other three haven't responded.
Tony and Loki continue to spend most of their waking hours in the lab, though that's nothing new for Tony. Over the next couple days, he starts building some of the electronics and weapons for the Hulkbuster suit.
Loki still spends a lot of time playing with Jarvis and Dum-E and drawing things like Disney characters, constellations, Dum-E, "Man of Iron" as Loki and Thor say, Peanuts characters and even some horses. Tony counts it as a good sign that Genie and Beast are included among the numerous drawings of other characters from movies they've watched- there are at least seven drawings of just Simba, as well as several of Simba with other characters. Loki's drawings all end up taped to the walls (or, for the constellation ones, the ceiling) of Loki's room. They certainly make his room more personalized; before, it never looked any different from any of the tower's other guest rooms.
Loki also works on Simba's Iron Man suit, and he finishes designing it after a couple days. It apparently hadn't even occurred to him that he would be able to make a real suit from the hologram, but when Tony tells him, Loki acts like it's the most amazing thing in the world. He starts jumping up and down, giving a somewhat unsettling mix between a scream of excitement and laughter.
When he calms down somewhat, Loki asks how to make the "glowy part," which Tony assumes means an arc reactor. Tony keeps switching between thinking he should just make a flashlight for it and thinking it would be fun go all out and make a very miniature arc reactor with only enough power to glow.
Eventually he decides to go all out. He makes it while Jarvis is cutting out pieces for both the Hulkbuster suit and Simba's Iron Man suit- it's a piece of cake compared to the first arc reactor he'd made (or even any of the others).
However, Loki hadn't designed the suit to actually snap around Simba, but Jarvis helps him fix it, designing a mini-briefcase that will automatically put the suit on Simba or remove it, much like the briefcases Tony has for some of his Iron Man suits.
After about another day, Simba's Iron Man suit is finally finished- Jarvis had painted it and everything. Loki puts Simba on the briefcase like Jarvis asks, telling the toy to stay still as if Simba were real. Tony had thought Loki had been over excited at the idea of making it, but that had been nothing compared to when Loki sees the mini briefcase snap the suit into place around Simba. He dashes around the room screaming like a kid on a sugar high.
Loki then proceeds to put Simba on the briefcase and watch in fascination as the suit is removed and put on again and again. Eventually, he leaves it on and carts Simba around while the toy's wearing the suit. He even sleeps with Simba still wearing the suit. Tony doesn't think cuddling a metal suit looks too comfortable, but Loki doesn't seem to mind. He seems to love the mini arc reactor, almost basking in whatever sensation he apparently gets out of them, and he definitely seems to appreciate the glow it provides during the night.
Tony spends a fun afternoon testing out the effects of one of the repulser prototype he's built in the weapons-testing room (he doesn't let Loki in, since Loki's not always predictable and he doesn't want to have to worry about Loki darting in the way of one of the blasts. Loki watches from the huge window between the room and the hall, but explosions don't seem to excite him as much as Simba's Iron Man suit).
Tony really loves this part of the process- it's second only to flying. Flying is still by far the most exhilarating overall, but blasting things is a great way to relieve stress.
He also finds the tracking bracelet he'd built for Loki a couple weeks ago among the clutter, and he ends up removing the tracking part and disguising it in a wristwatch with a leather band instead of that metal, cuff-like band he'd had before. Honestly, he should have done that in the beginning when Loki said he didn't like the metal band. Besides, the watch looks less conspicuous.
Nothing changes in the nightmare department, since Tony and Loki both still have them. However, Tony's started trying to go to bed again after comforting Loki or calming down himself, and Loki apparently does too, according to Jarvis. Tony switches back to hot chocolate for their post-nightmare sessions to avoid caffeine. It's sort of hard to fall asleep after nightmares, but at least they're making an effort now instead of just staying up the rest of the night and being very sleep-deprived.
Tony witnesses several other instances of Loki's powers. Loki still freaks out whenever an incident occurs. There are all the usual things (and it feels so weird for Tony to realize he thinks of odd energy around Loki's hands and intangible illusions of the god as normal) and Loki even changes the color of Simba's armor once, seemingly on accident. There's one new incident of something that hasn't happened before. During one of Loki's nightmares, while Loki's body temperature drops, ice actually begins to spread across his hand. Tony has a feeling both of those things have to do with being a Jotun.
Tony's reminded of his other job as the owner of Stark Industries when Pepper sends an incredibly long email detailing everything that's happened to the company in the last couple weeks. Making Pepper CEO hadn't made her stop doing this sort of thing. Tony sets Jarvis to reading it, but regrets it when Jarvis adds a bunch of things to his calendar that he doesn't want to deal with. There's some multi-day conference Jarvis keeps reminding him about that Tony really wants to get out of.
Finally they get a positive response from one of the therapists. Gwyneth Carlisle has worked with soldiers suffering from PTSD, as well as people suffering from a single traumatic event such as dealing with armed robbers. It's not exactly the same as Loki's situation and Tony's not sure how it will address the whole abuse issue, but at least she doesn't care that Loki's from Asgard.
However, it's about a forty five minute drive each way from the tower to where she works, mostly because New York traffic is terrible. Jarvis has a somewhat lengthy conversation with Gwyneth (apparently she doesn't notice he's not human) and then puts Tony on at his request. Loki's in the room but seems to be totally ignoring them.
Tony really wants her to just come to the tower, but apparently she has a patient before Loki. Tony is about to offer her money to reschedule that person, but apparently Jarvis mutes him and takes over. In retrospect, bribing her probably wouldn't have been a good idea, since she's already sort of breaking the rules by seeing Loki in the first place.
Jarvis at least gets it so she'll think about coming here for appointments, but they have to go there for the first one. Tony's not happy about the idea of losing so much time, but Jarvis seems to think it would be a good idea. Somehow Jarvis manages to talk him into it agreeing to go there.
All Tony can think is that this had better be worth the time.
So hopefully you enjoyed this. I'm a little worried it might have been boring though.
I figured it was time for Loki to see Tony having a nightmare. That was one of the things I was really looking forward to writing.
By the way, I totally named the therapist Gwyneth after the actress who plays Pepper. Plus it's a cool name.
So, next chapter is Loki's first therapy session. I'm not sure when I'll be able to update, since this week is probably going to be really busy. Hopefully it won't be too long. I want to keep updating in a week most of the time, even though I missed it this time.