AN: After all the intense drama of the last few chapters I wanted to lighten things up a little bit. This chapter is a little bit of filler, but it's also important for the development of the Cartwills relationship, and actually it is pretty integral to how the story goes, so I hope you all enjoy. Don't worry though, it'll be back to being intense soon, lol. The story is def reaching the end stages now. I'm kind of doing a Safran, and regretting what I did to poor Karen in the prologue, but this whole story has been building up to that moment so I can't stop now! Oh and writing this story has got me annoyed again at how badly the Smash writers have always written Karen these past 2 seasons. It's not so hard to give her a little depth surely! Lol
"I was about 8 years old, and my mom took me to the Civic Center in Des Moines to watch the touring production of Les Mis. I was hooked. I spent the next few weeks standing in the mirror, wearing my dad's trenchcoat, pretending to be Eponine, and singing 'On My Own' at the top of my lungs. Drove my parents crazy!"
Derek laughed. "I bet you were the most adorable little Eponine ever."
They were sitting on the steps at South Street Seaport, eating fish and chips, and watching the world go by. Derek had told Jerry in no uncertain terms that they needed another week to prepare for the Hit List Broadway previews, that everyone was exhausted, not least Karen, and that they all needed a few days off. Jerry didn't fight him. Even he was savvy enough to know that opening on Broadway without Karen, having already gone through the drama of losing Kyle and Jimmy, would only harm the show. And besides, Hit List was already sold out 6 months in advance, so it's financial success wasn't an issue. He could take the hit.
Karen had told Derek that a break for everyone meant a break for him too. "When was the last time you took a proper break from the theater?" she asked him. "Actually took a day off?" "Probably my sister's wedding" he replied ... "10 years ago."
"Oh my god Derek!" Karen hit him on the arm in astonishment. "Okay, that settles it. Tomorrow you and I are going to be serious tourists. Visit everywhere in Manhattan ... except Times Square and Broadway or course!" she laughed. "Deal?"
"Deal!"
They had an early breakfast at a great little place in the East Village Ana and her went to all the time. Karen had then dragged Derek around MOMA, before they took the elevator up to the top of the Empire State Building. She'd then taken him to her fave sushi restaurant in Washington Square for lunch.
"Where do you want to go next?" she asked.
"You've been the perfect tour guide so far, so you choose!" Derek replied.
"Okay, how about we stroll through Greenwich, and then we can head downtown to South Street Seaport for some good old British fish and chips! I love it there."
"Sounds perfect" Derek said. So as they sat on the steps at South Street Seaport, he hadn't felt this content in a long time. Maybe ever. They had such easy conversation and banter, he and Karen. He'd loved today, and he was more in love with her than ever.
The spark between them was there, he knew that. But he also knew Karen wasn't ready for anything other than friendship. She'd made that clear enough. It sent a pang through his heart to know that she might never be ready, and even worse, that when she was ready to give her heart away to someone again, that someone might not be him.
"So how about you?" she said, resting her head on his shoulder, as she stole one of his chips. "Hey Miss Cartwright! I've got my eyes on you! ... how about me what?"
"When did you know your life was in the theater? I mean, I refuse to believe you came out of your mother's womb as the Dark Lord!"
Derek laughed. "Let me see. I think it was probably the day my mum caught me standing in front of the mirror, wearing my dad's trenchcoat, singing 'On My Own' at the top of my voice."
"Oh my god, you liar!" she laughed, playfully bashing him on the arm ... I've had a really great day Derek, thank you!" She kissed him on the cheek. It was all he could do not to pull her in for a passionate kiss. She was just so lovely.
She rested her head back on his shoulder again, and they sat in contented silence for a few minutes, watching the ferries coming in.
Karen was getting back to her old self again, much to Derek's relief. She still had moments where she went back into her shell, but he knew that it was going to take time. She'd actually taken herself off to see a shrink. Someone Bobby used, which made Derek chuckle, and she seemed to be helping her no end.
Karen had since opened up to Derek about Jimmy, and the more she told him about his life, his terrible upbringing, the more Derek felt pity, rather than anger. He could understand now why a dreamer like Karen, with such a good heart, could be so drawn to him ... be so eager to try and fix him. Even after everything that had happened, Derek knew that she still cared for him, and somehow felt a little bit responsible for him. That was never going to change.
He would never tell Karen this, but the night she nearly killed herself, after Ana had gone to bed, he'd gone over to Jimmy's place. He wasn't sure what he was going to do, but he was pretty sure it would involve beating the crap out of him. However, when he got there, he found the door ajar, and Jimmy and his stuff gone. The place was emptied out. He didn't know where Jimmy had gone, but he didn't care as long as it was far away from Karen. He'd told her that he'd heard Jimmy had moved away. She simply nodded, but he could see the relief in her eyes.
"You know" he said after a while. "It looks like my 'My Fair Lady' revival is finally back on. Jerry and Eileen reached an understanding, and Jerry's happy for Eileen to go it alone. Obviously his generosity has nothing at all to do with all the money Hit List is going to make him!" He rolled his eyes. Karen smiled. "He really is the worst!"
He looked over at Karen. "You'd make a perfect Eliza Doolittle, you know that?! The audience would eat you up!"
Her eyes lit up in excitement. "Oh my, you'd let me audition?! I used to dream of playing Eiza Doolittle when I was younger. I must have seen the movie about 50 times! ... I have to warn you though, my English accent is woeful!" she joked.
"Sweetheart, you probably won't even need to audition. Eileen loves you, and I, well ... you'd get my vote."
"I don't want any special favours Derek" Karen said.
"I know, and you won't get any. But don't forget, Hit List is going to turn you into a big Broadway star Karen. You need to prepare yourself for that. After opening night, mark my words, the offers will come pouring in. We'll be having to fight to get you!"
"Let's just wait and see shall we? Hit List hasn't even opened on Broadway yet!" she laughed. "I just want to take each day at a time."
"Of course darling" he replied.
They sat together, quietly chatting, until the winter sun went in, and they both realised how cold they were. "I know a great place around the corner" Derek said, "that does the best hot chocolates in the city. What do you say?"
"I say lead the way Mr Wills!" She smiled at him. He took her hand in his, and they carefully made their way back down the steps, arm in arm. He wished this day could go on forever.