(I own nothing!)

I set down the last scalpel and look around the room. The Captain had gotten a job moving cattle from one town to the other daily. The herds had been too big and the trail too long to move safely over that distance. Jayne, Zoe, Wash and the Captain would move the cattle from town to town every day on Serenity and I would help out at the local clinic while everyone else did something, what I'm not exactly sure, and most likely wouldn't care if I did since I already had a job. They already had a doctor, but it was better than sitting around doing nothing or going shopping with Kaylee and Inara. *Shudder*

"Simon, are you done yet?" I smile at Tom, the small town's resident doctor.

"Yes." He's a sweet man, always willing to help with anything and not too bad looking. His skin is pale from working away from the sun's glare, his hair is blonde, his eyes a vivid olive green and he's the same height as me.

"You are going to be leaving soon?" I nod.

"Yes, the Captain only has two days left in the contract and then back to the black." I'm going to miss working here, with the wide open space, but I find myself missing the hum of the engine and the gentle sway of the floor under my feet.

Pulling myself out of my thoughts, I notice Tom shift uncomfortably.

"Something wrong?"

"N-No, well maybe, yes? I don't know." He stutters not looking me in the face.

"Tom, you okay?" I'm starting to get worried.

"Simon I was-" He stopped to clear his throat. "Simon…"

"Yes?" He was wringing his hands and still refused to look me in the eye.

"Simon…" He took a deep breath and his next words freeze me in my tracks.

Later that day I find myself staring at my dinner and trying to pay attention to the conversation. But it is hard because my mind keeps wandering to Tom. What in the world had I been thinking?

"Doc, something wrong?" I lift my head to see Mal looking at me expectantly.

"No."

"Really? Because you haven't eaten anything."

"Well more for us then." Jayne says reaching for my plate before Mal smacks his hand and glares at him, then turns back to look at me.

"Nothing's wrong, Captain, just not really hungry." He seems to accept this answer because he turns back to his dinner, but I can still feel his eyes on me. There is silence at the table before a thought hits me.

"Captain?"

"Yes, Doc?"

"Will you have any need for me tomorrow?" He stares at me looking for what I might be getting at.

"Yeah, Doc, we need a pansy-assed core-boy to help us move cattle." Jayne snarls at me. Mal smacks him again and gives him the 'I will throw you out the airlock if you keep this up' look.

"No, I can't think of any reason that we would need you."

"Good." I take a sip of water, stand and begin to clear my dishes.

"Do you mind my asking as to why it's good that we don't need you? You planning on running off on us Doc?" Mal asks with a smile on his face.

"No." I hear them go back to eating and I contemplate not telling them. It is my business but I don't want to give the captain any more reasons to hit me. "I won't be here for dinner tomorrow night."

"And why is that?"

"Because… I have a date." The sound of both food and drink being expelled from the crew's mouths tells me that my having a date is right up there with Jayne getting a sex change on the possibility scale.

"You have a what?" I hear Mal choke out, trying to regain his breath.

"I have date." I finally turn to look at them and they stare like hypnotized lemmings at me. All in all it is kind of creepy.

"Why, Captain, is it so strange that the good doctor should have a date?" I smile at Book, he is the only one taking this well. He was a good friend. "Do you have a problem with slys?" Okay, never mind, I hate him.

I hadn't exactly told anyone that particular fact about myself. Except Book, of course, because I thought he could keep his big mouth shut!

"No, Shepherd, I ain't got a problem with the Doc going off on a date. Be it a man or not." Mal levels a look at Book, daring him to give him a lecture.

River asks, "Are you sure, Captain? What if they fall in love, we move into a little cottage and there'll be singing animals and flowers. Everyone will randomly burst into song and dance." Everyone turns to stare at River.

"Kaylee, what exactly have you been letting River do when you watch her? Never mind, I really don't want to know." I sigh rubbing my temples. "Anyway, I haven't even gone on the date yet. It might not work out."

"But it might and then everyone who missed their chance will spend the rest of their lives alone and miserable and hating themselves for missing their one chance at true happiness, forever doomed to be apart because they are too thick-headed to get off their ass, take a risk and stop being such a wimp!"

"Okay, that was really specific." Wash said eyeing River.

"So who's the lucky boy?" I smile at Inara. Finally, someone who's not acting psycho.

"Tom. He is the doctor here in town. He'll be picking me up tomorrow night at five to go to dinner."

"What's he like?" Kaylee pipes in.

"It doesn't really matter since we will be meeting him tomorrow night." I jerk as Mal speaks for the first time in several minutes. "He's going to be picking the Doc up from here so ya'll will get your chance to bug him. Right, Doc?"

"Right…" I won't get to go on the date since Tom will go running for the hills the second he meets them. Shit.

"BOOB!" River screams, causing us to jump.

"Now what have I done?" I groan.

"Not you." She says glaring. "But you're stupid, too."

"Thanks." I mutter stalking out of the room thinking about my date tomorrow.

The next day isn't eventful but tension is dancing in the air as the time for my date draws closer. Inara helps me pick out something to wear, Kaylee bugs me all day about Tom and the Shepherd gives me the 'keep all your buttons buttoned' lecture while trying not to let me know that's what he is doing. I don't think I have ever been so embarrassed in my life.

I stand in the infirmary. I'm not cleaning or doing any sort of work, I am just standing there tugging at my clothes. I'm wearing a simple light blue shirt unbuttoned at the neck, black vest and black slacks.

I glance at the clock on the wall. Five minutes till Tom is supposed to pick me up. Walking out of the infirmary, I slip past the kitchen where the crew is talking of playing poker. Once I am clear of the kitchen, I run to the cargo bay as quietly as I can.

I haven't been on a date in years, but I remember the meet-the-parents part and I that had hated it. But I know one thing, it was nothing compared to what would happen if Tom has to meet the crew.

I am only a few feet from the door when a stray thought wafts across my mind.

If I leave now I might be able to catch Tom at the clinic and not have to have him meet the rest of the residents of the nut house.

Shit. I'm not supposed to think that. And only a few seconds later I hear my brat sister's voice.

"CAPTAIN! SIMON'S TRYING TO SNEAK OUT WITHOUT US MEETING HIS DATE!"

River, you stupid brat.

I hear the sound of pounding footsteps behind me. I run for the door and almost have it open when a hand lands on it forcing it shut again. Rats.

"You're leaving already, Doc?" I turn to see a slightly out of breath Malcolm Reynolds. "Nice try."

I glare at him. "I got a wave from Tom asking me to meet him at the clinic."

"Really? That's not a very gentlemanly thing to do this close to your date. Wash, did we get any waves today for the Doc?"

"No, sir, we didn't." I turn my evil eye on Wash and give him the 'we are no longer friends' look. He smiles and mouths 'sorry' with no conviction.

"Well, then we'll all have to wait for him to show up, won't we?"

"Yes, sir, I think that's the best idea you've had all day," Zoe says. I would have glared at her but one: she still had her gun and two: there was a knock on the door. I moved to open it but Mal beat me to it, throwing open the door.

There on the other side stood Tom, a bouquet of roses in one hand and a shy smile on his face.

"Hi."

"Hi." I try to smile back but the form of an overly nosy Captain gets in the way.

"Hello," Tom stutters, faced with an intimidating Malcolm Reynolds. "Who are you?"

"It's rude to ask someone's name before telling them your own." Tom blushes at the scolding. "My name is Captain Malcolm Reynolds," Mal says in what I think is supposed to be a greeting, but sounds more like a threat.

"My name's Tom. It's a pleasure to meet you." He holds out his hand but Mal ignores it.

"The pleasure is all yours. Now what do you want?"

"Uh- I'm here to pick up Simon for our date? Is he here?"

"I'm here." I call forcing my way past Mal before he gives Tom a heart attack from fright. Tom stares at me and I blush.

"Wow. I mean, you look great."

"You mean he hasn't looked good any other time you've seen him?" Mal, I could just shoot you.

"No!"

"So he looks horrible any other time?"

"No he- I mean yes-he always looks good just- he- um-"

"Are those for me?" I cut in before Mal can give Tom an ulcer from worry.

"Yes!" Tom nearly shouts, happy to be discussing something that he understands. He hands me the flowers as I mentally curse every Reynolds I can think of and since I only know the one, it's a short list.

"They're beautiful, thank you." I smile at him and he relaxes a little. "River, why don't you go put these in some water?" I ask, handing them to my sister who is still glaring at Tom.

"Why do I have to?" She asks in a whisper.

"Because I'm scared to leave Tom alone with the Captain or anyone else on this crew for longer than .001 of a nanosecond," I hiss back. She takes the roses.

"You're going to regret this."

"I already do," I mutter. Turning back, I find Mal circling Tom, like a lion would a hurt gazelle before it delivers the killing blow.

"Tom?" Both men jump at the sound of my voice. "Shouldn't we be going?"

"Y-Yes, we should," Tom stutters as we head for the door.

"Oh, can't you stay a little longer? I mean, we only just got to know you." Mal smiles.

"No, if we stay any longer we'll lose our reservations," I say smiling back at Mal.

"We don't have-" I pinch the skin on the back of Tom's arm. "H- He's right, we have to get going."

I all but drag Tom out of the ship.

"What did I do to piss off the captain?" Tom asks as we walk to the restaurant.

"You didn't do anything wrong, there's just something wrong with him," I mutter as we vanish into the night.

I stare at the door that the Doc and that boy walked out of.

"How long are they going to be gone?" I snarl turning to look at Zoe.

"Sir, they've only been gone fifteen minutes. Since most dates last at least an hour, my guess is a while," she replies, rolling her eyes. "Captain, why are you so worried?"

"What do we really know about this boy? I only met him for three minutes before he dragged Simon off for their 'date'. Do you know anything about him?"

"No, I don't know him," Zoe said, watching me as I pace the length of the cargo bay door. "And, sir?"

"Yes."

"You're wrong about who was doing the dragging. I think Simon was worried that you'd scare off his date. You weren't being the most charming man to him."

"Charming? I thought Mal was going to shoot the boy!" Wash said from his place on the floor. He was attempting to beat both Kaylee and River at checkers at the same time.

"I was worried! As I just said we don't know the boy and we just let him walk off with our medic, who might I add, is a wanted fugitive? So excuse me for being a little worried."

"Captain Daddy's right, he could be a serial killer who's going to take Simon in to his basement and hack him into small pieces."

I stare at River.

"Thank you, River, that makes us all feel so much better," Wash says, rolling his eyes as he takes one of Kaylee's kings.

"Or worse, he could make a salesperson disguised as a doctor," River says, a look of fear on her face. She jumps the rest of Wash's pieces, winning the game and sticks out her tongue.

"Now everybody stop," Book says, looking up from his bible. "We should be happy for Simon. He spends all his time cooped up in that infirmary. He deserves a night out. And he deserves the right to his privacy."

We all look at our feet slightly ashamed. He did deserve a night out, but why couldn't he do that with one of us with him, one of us with a nice big gun strapped to their hip.

"Anyway," Book continued. "I already ran a background check on the man. Apart from a few minor bar fights and murders, he's completely clean."

I choked on my own spit.

"WHAT?" We stare at the Shepherd.

"I'm kidding. The man is completely clean. Well, I wasn't kidding about the bar fights."

"Shepherd, don't joke about the safety of my crew. I was about to go out there and shoot the bastard. Then I would have to explain to the feds that I shot him because our Shepherd has a sense of humor." I growled.

"Well, the look on your face was pretty funny, Captain."

"Wash, don't you have a ship to fly?"

"We're not flying right now, Captain."

"Then go find something to do that isn't bothering me! Now git!" I shooed them out.

"This is going to be a long wait." I sigh, sitting down on the steps and staring at the door.

The date is going well. We were eating at a nice restaurant and he is as sweet as any person could be without turning into a pile of sugar. But even as he tells me about what drew him to me and asks about my past, I feel a hole. Not just a hole, but something missing, something important. There isn't any sarcasm or crude jokes, no cursing under his breath when something goes wrong with our order and he doesn't smile at the little details like… Oh, bloody hell. I am not thinking about the captain while on my date!

I will have fun and not think about crude, rugged, ship captains in suspenders and long brown coats.

"Where the hell is he? He is past his curfew!" I snarl, once again pacing the length of the floor, Wash had muttered something about me wearing holes in the floor before I ordered him to help the Shepherd in the kitchen.

"We have a curfew, sir?" I glare at her, well, not her, more like the smirk happily situated on her lips.

"We do now." I glare at the clock as it seems to slow down just to spite me. Doc is in for an earful when he gets back.

I sit there sipping wine that for once is actually the vintage that the bottle says it is. Ah, the things you miss after living out in the black. Tom sits across from me, talking about surgeries he's done and some of his patients. I find myself wondering why we aren't talking about guns, smuggling jobs or telling funny and mostly inappropriate stories.

I drain my glass and as he refills it, I begin to think about how soft his hands look. They look like they haven't worked a day in their life and they look…girly.

I am losing my mind.

"Sir, calm down. Doc will be back soon, you'll realize you worried for nothing, and then we can get some sleep."

She is right, things are going to be fine. The Doc will come home and we will leave this planet the first chance we get.

Unless River was right about the ax murderer thing. The very unhelpful voice in the back of my head adds.

Oh, hell.

We sway on the dance floor. My hands are on his shoulders, and his on my waist. I wouldn't have to stand on the balls of my feet to be eye level during a screaming fight.

I look at him as we sway and about as slow as a speeding train everything wrong with this man hits me… or everything not wrong with him. His eyes aren't blue enough and I don't become lost in them. His hair is so blonde it looks gaudy. He is wearing a tie and his pants look way too loose for him, he is wearing green instead of brown and doesn't have suspenders on. He speaks like a robot without an accent and he doesn't speak Chinese. And when he speaks, he lacks authority.

And this is getting way out of hand.

I am about to start pulling my hair out by the roots.

Where in the world is that boy? And then every place I didn't want to find him assaults my mind.

I growl at the door in warning that there would be consequences if he didn't walk through it soon.

We walk back to Serenity. Tom, ever the gentleman, had paid the tab. He holds my hand and my arm feels oddly stretched trying to hold on. As Serenity comes into view, I think about our date and try to view it as anything but completely and utterly wrong. I try to think of something about the date that I can't find a problem with. The food was lacking spices, the restaurant felt dead without any bright Kaylee smiles and well, it just wasn't for me.

As we stop outside the door to my home, Tom turns to me. I look into his eyes and I see what should have been mirrored in my own. Love.

He leans forward and gives me a kiss. It is a good kiss, but it didn't make my heart flutter, it is unheated and he doesn't take control. I try; I try to pour myself into the kiss.

I want him to be the right one. Maybe I could do it; maybe I could live here and be happy. But only a core pansy could live here and I realize that I no longer was part of that world. I'm not part of the Rim world either. I am part of Serenity.

He pulls away.

"I'm sorry."

"I know. I really wish that it was me, Simon. You're the most amazing man I have ever met." He cups my face, stroking my cheek. "I hope he knows how lucky he is." I blush and try not to cry at the look of hurt on his face that he's trying to hide.

"I'm so sorry." But this time he just smiles.

"Just…Just promise me you'll be happy with him."

"I will." He leans forward and kisses me one more time before letting go completely.

"I would have kicked myself for the rest of my life if I didn't get one last kiss." He smiles and turns away, slowly fading into the dark.

I sigh and open the door.

"WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN?" I jump and turn to see the entire crew in their PJ's glaring at me.

"What are you all doing up?" I stare at them.

"The Captain was so worried about you that he kept us up."

"I wasn't worried." The crew gawked as Mal walked in, the picture of calm. "You guys should get to bed; I need you up and ready in the morning for takeoff."

"It is morning," Wash snarled, stomping with the rest of the crew to their respective bunks.

"How was your date?" I looked at Mal. Everything fit; everything that had been missing found its way back. The eyes, the hands and those damn suspenders.

"It went… well, let's just say there won't be any second dates." I smile and head for my bunk. "Goodnight, Captain."

"Goodnight, Simon." I am almost out of the room when he calls my name again.

"Simon?"

"Yes?"

"Two days from now we're having a meet for the next job on Horris and you're going to have to go with us."

"Sure I'll go."

"I wasn't asking." I smile as he turns and walks toward his bunk.

'There's no place else I can be since I found Serenity'

'Or Malcolm Reynolds.'