CPOV

I love my sister, I really do. But the one time I get the courage to kiss Ana, she goes and interrupts it! I knew I should have locked them out of the apartment for just maybe a minute. Walking out to the kitchen hand in hand we spot Mia, Kate, and Elliot. As the girls ambush Ana for hugs, Elliot and I pat each other on the back.

"Have you made a move yet bro," Elliot whispers. I look at him with shocked eyes. "Oh come on now Christian. A blind man could see you like Ana. What's holding you back from making a move? Was she okay after the break in the other night?"

"How did you know about that?"

"Bro, Mom and Gail are practically sisters. Word travels."

"She was fine just a little shaken. I let her decide on what to do with them."

"Clever move." Mia soon comes to give me a hug also.

"So Mia, what have you brought for us to watch tonight?"

"The Breakfast Club and Breakfast at Tiffany's," she states with eagerness.

"Ah man, now I'm craving breakfast for dinner," Kate comments.

"That actually does sound great. Shall we make some food between movies?"

"Yes," the trio says together, causing us all to laugh. While Mia pops in the movie, Ana snuggles into my arms. As the movie plays, I can hardly focus on it. All I am really thinking of is Ana. I'm still looking into Issac and his friend John and where they are, but have had no such luck. They flew under the radar a few years ago, but I'm not giving up on finding them. Looking down at Ana, I know I want to give her the world. I know it's a little early to think of Christmas gifts, but I think I know the perfect one.

Once the first movie is over, we all get up and ready the kitchen. I don't want to bother Gail so Ana and I make the meal.

"Would anyone like wine," I ask. Everyone accepts. As I pour up the liquid, the elevator arrives and out walks Luke, with his discarded shirt in his hand. We all eye him suspiciously and watch as he turns beet red.

"Well, this is kind of weird," Luke mumbles causing us to burst into laughter.

"Luke this is my brother Elliot and his wife Kate."

"Pleasure to meet you Mr. and Mrs. Grey," he states professionally.

"Oh God don't call us that please! Elliot and Kate will be fine," Kate comments. He chuckles and then spots Mia and reddens again.

"And that is my sister Mia."

"Very nice to meet you Ms. Grey."

"Mia please," she quietly comments. Holy shit! My sister might actually be shy! "Why are you shirtless?"

"I was out for a run and, um, got hot." He can't take his eyes off her. I feel Ana's hand lace between mine. I look down into her hopeful eyes as she looks back at Luke and Mia.

"Luke we were going to have some wine and breakfast for dinner before we watch The Breakfast Club. Would you like to join us?"

"Oh no I couldn't. I'd hate to interrupt the party."

"Please," Mia begs. It doesn't take long before he complies. He runs off to shower while Ana and I cook. As we do, I can see us doing this together, up at night making meals, in our own happy bubble. I'm so off in my daydream, I almost burn the bacon. Soon Luke comes back out and we enjoy pancakes, bacon, rolls, and hash browns. We all converse easily and Luke tells us more stories from his days in the Army. I notice out of the corner of my eye Ana grimaces at her wine.

"What's wrong," I ask with the concern evident in my voice.

"It doesn't taste very good," she mouths as she scrunches up her nose. I chuckle before I kiss it.

"It's an acquired taste." I wink and watch as she blushes, chews on her bottom lip, and lays her head against my arm.

After we have wined, dined, and laughed, we call it a night. Kate, Mia, and Elliot stay over since they've been drinking. Kate and Elliot take Ana's room while Luke offers his room to Mia for the night while he sleeps in the living room. Right before Ana and I head off to bed, I see Mia and Luke kiss each other on the cheek. A tiny twinge of envy goes through me. I try to push it from my mind as I head in behind Ana into my bedroom, but as she goes to brush her teeth, it builds in me. I've changed into my pajama bottoms and am sitting on my bed staring at my floor. Why can't I let Ana be that close to me? Why can't I be a normal man without insecurities? We're obviously friends but, would she ever want more? Why can't I make a move? Can I see myself in a relationship again? Probably not. Jealousy can easily blacken a person's heart and turn them against one another. But Ana would understand. But I need to let her go. I'll still provide every need she has but I can't be with her romantically. She deserves to have a husband who she can have kids with and grow old together. As for me: I know the rest of my life will be spent alone, saving women for as long as it takes. I'm snapped out of my world of misery when Ana snakes her arms around my center from behind me. I have no shirt on still, but I can feel her soft skin of her cheek rest on my bare shoulder. I suddenly feel it, like a liquid being injected into my blood. She places her lips gently on one of my scars and I feel warmth, concern, and love seep through my skin. My head rises as she continues kissing my scars and the tears fall from my eyes to the floor. This beauty, this angel, this beacon of light, this goddess can withstand to touch my marred skin. She doesn't find me repulsive at all. My wonderful, beautiful, innocent Ana can touch my scars and send a ray of healing through me. After she kisses all the ones on my back, I turn to see her. She cups my face, tear stains on her face too, and she gently kisses my eyes. I take a deep breath and feel as if all the fear, anger, frustration, and confusion about my insecurities, dissipate. My eyes bore into hers. I sometimes feel that our eyes say more than we verbally communicate.

"The women I dated weren't allowed to touch my chest or my back. I would always wear a shirt when we..." I feel her face heat under my palm and I love the feeling. "No matter how hard I would try to hide it, somehow they would end up seeing my chest or back and it would disgust them. Shallow I know, but people are afraid of things they don't understand. I was always self-conscious of my scars. Once they would become disgusted by me, it would eat away at the confidence I had. I can show confidence in about everything I do but my insecurities still haunt me Ana. Seeing Elliot and Kate, and just now Mia and Luke causes me to feel like I'm not worthy of love. There are times when I feel I will never be able to have a normal life with a woman who loves the needy and over attached man I am. I've tried for so long to accept who I am, scars and all. But the jealousy, self-loathing, and self-doubt still comes back. I want to feel wanted by a woman, to feel needed, to feel loved. But I'm afraid of opening up myself to someone for them to just see me as I truly am, both on the inside and out."

"Christian, you are loved by so many people, more than you could possibly know. Despite the scars that mark you, we all have scars, some are visible and some aren't. If, the women you're interested in pursuing, don't accept you for who you are, all in all, then she's a waste of time. I wish I could guarantee you will find the perfect woman to complete you, but I can't. But I can guarantee you this, you have more compassion, love, heart, kindness, and strength in one finger than most people do in their whole heart. Any woman in their right mind would love to love you. It's so simple to do so." I look at her lips and see they're trembling, like she's on the verge of saying something, but she instead rests her head against mine while my remaining tears flow. But they're not tears of sadness. My heart is overflowing with what she has said. She doesn't see me as a clingy and over-bearing guy. She sees me as a man with a heart of gold, something to be obtained. Her hand softly glides down my face, on my neck, and down to rest right above my heart. Her touch sends another surge of the healing feeling I felt before, like she's washing away my pain. I smile to myself from the feeling. After we wipe away each others tears, I kiss her eyes too and hold her close to me. After we've lain down for a while in each others embrace, she has fallen asleep. I know this is my only chance. I barely kiss the corner of her mouth. Her lips feel as soft as I thought. As I pull back, I see her smile in her sleep and mouth my name. I lie back down, pulling her closer and fall asleep once again with a smile plastered on my face.

I feel the bed move from around me. I peak one eye open and see it's not time to get up. Ana rises from the bed and walks over to the bathroom. I breath a sigh of relief. In a minute or so, I feel the bed dip once again. I don't move even when I feel her hair tickle my nose. I then feel soft, feather-like skin against my lips. I almost believe I imagined it until it gets the slightest bit harder and I full-on feel her glorious lips against mine. I kiss her back gingerly and can almost feel the heat coming off her beautiful face. She breaks the kiss, so I whisper her name, feigning sleep. She nuzzles into my neck and I can feel her smile against my skin. It matches the smile on my face.