"Of something after death"

Draco pulled out his homework as he tried to explain the situation better to Hermione. "Well, they knew he wasn't in the common room by then, but they didn't know if he'd grabbed one of the students." Just then, Harry staggered into the classroom and sat down near Tracey. He looked like he hadn't had any sleep, Draco noted, but Hermione quickly took his attention away from Harry.

"I don't understand," Hermione said, arranging her desk. "How do they not know who was in the common room? They couldn't do a head count? Or have some sort of - I don't know, a magical alarm system?"

"Apparently not," Tracey cut in. "I heard they didn't even let them get back to bed until 2 am -"

"What happened?" Harry asked sleepily.

But Pansy was the one to cut in, eager to tell the story. "Didn't you hear? Rodolphus Lestrange tried to break into the Gryffindor dormitories last night," she whispered, her voice full of shock and just a touch of glee.

"They had to evacuate the dormitory," Tracey said quietly, turning to Harry. That seemed to wake him up. "They weren't even sure that he wasn't in the castle 'til this morning."

"Are the Gryffindors all right?" Harry asked, a little sharply. "Did they find all of them?"

"Well, that's what I was telling Hermione when you came in," Draco tried to explain to him. "They weren't able to do a full head count until 2 am -"

"Which is awful," Hermione whispered. "If one of them had been hurt - or worse -"

"But no one was," Tracey reminded her.

"This time -"

"The real question is," Pansy cut in, "what was he doing, trying to get into the Gryffindor dorms anyways?"

"It's not that big of a secret," Tracey said, yawning. "Remember?" She looked at Hermione, and then back to Harry, who also looked confused. "The trial? They had a write up on it when he escaped -"

Draco frowned. "They wouldn't have heard about it," he reminded Tracey. "Remember, Hermione grew up in the muggle world -"

"Yeah, I'm just surprised Harry hadn't," Tracey confessed. "It was such a huge deal. He tried to kill Frank Longbottom," she explained to Harry and Hermione. "He's the chief auror -"

"Yeah, I know who he is," Harry said, finally speaking. "But what does that have to do with - oh. You mean Neville?"

Tracey shrugged. "It'd make sense. I heard he really had it out for the Longbottoms, though no one ever knew why - Draco, did your aunt -"

"No," Draco said sharply, cutting her off before she could say anything further. Not that he actually knew anything. Lestrange was never to be mentioned in the Black or Malfoy households.

"I'll explain later," he told Hermione abruptly in response to her questioning look. The Gryffindors were starting to filter in to the Transfiguration classroom, looking none too happy in the early morning.

"Still, I'm not sure why he'd want to kill Longbottom's son now," Tracey said thoughtfully. "I heard he's not even that great at magic. He probably wanted to go for Potter -"

"Shh," Hermione said angrily. Tracey blinked, and the girl gestured towards the Gryffindors. Draco looked up and accidentally met Longbottom's eyes; the Gryffindor flushed red and looked down at the ground.

Hermione looked over at Longbottom too. "That wasn't necessary," she told Tracey crossly. "He's not too bad -"

The doors to the classroom opened with a creak. Silence spread like a wave as McGonagall made her way wordlessly through the desks to reach the front of the room. She eyed them all with an unreadable glint in her eye. For once, no one really made a sound as they got their homework out of their bags.

Draco couldn't put his finger on it, but there was something wrong in the air.

"Ginny!" Ron yelled at her from across the room amongst the noise of Gryffindor common room. "Oi, Gin-"

"I'm coming, Ron," Ginny threw back at him over her shoulder, trying to at least put a smile on her face. It'd been a week since Harry had slipped her the message in the library about finding some stupid map - how, she didn't know - but she still hadn't had a chance to get out of Gryffindor. She was bursting with anxiety since then, cooped up like some animal in the tower. Most Gryffindors had refused to leave except when necessary. Fia looked alright in class, but they never had a chance to talk except in Potions.

"Yes?" She said, biting back the cutting edge in her voice as she marched over to her brother.

"Oh, hey Ginny," Charles Potter said, flashing a smile at her. The lout was idiotic enough to think she still avoided him because she had some sort of crush.

"Mum had something she wanted me to give you." Ron asked, craning his head up instead of actually standing to talk to her.

"Oh," Ginny said in surprise. "What was it?"

"I dunno, it was in the care package this morning."

"Where's that?" Ginny asked with a small sigh.

"Upstairs. It's on my trunk, you can just grab it."

Ginny could have strangled her brother in frustration. "Couldn't you just go get it?" she asked, trying to reason with him. "It's a little weird, going into the guys' dormitory."

"Merlin, Gin, don't you see we're busy?" Ron said, turning away from her. "Just go grab the package." He moved his chess piece. "There. Checkmate!" he cried triumphantly.

"Only because your sister was distracting us," Charles replied petulantly, his charm disappearing as fast as it came. "Come on. I wanna study up on Defense so I'm prepared the next time that Death Eater breaks in. Not like Longbottom's going to be much help."

Ginny rolled her eyes as the two boys broke open their textbooks - the first time this year, likely, she thought sourly. As if Lestrange could be defeated by some idiotic spell in a third year textbook. But the two didn't notice her sudden change in demeanor, and soon got distracted by talk of the last Quidditch match anyways. She turned around towards the boy's staircase. Might as well see what the fuss was about the package. Lost in her thoughts, she didn't realize she'd walked into Longbottom.

"Hi, Ginny," he said quietly, his face a little red. "I can walk you upstairs, if you want," he offered slowly. "I know which trunk is Ron's."

She would have made a snide comment about her brother if she wasn't aware of the need to keep her thoughts secret. "Thanks," she replied with a sigh. "I appreciate that."

"Yeah, no worries," he mumbled. "I was going to head to bed anyways."

"Hey," she said, cringing a little. "You shouldn't listen to them -"

"Them, or everyone?" Neville shrugged awkwardly as they went up the stairs. "Don't worry, my dad thinks the same."

"I'm sure he doesn't..." But her tone was halfhearted, and she knew it. Even amongst Light families the only Longbottom son was a bit of a joke. "It'll get better," she told him as they paused on the landing of the third years' dorm, more determined this time. "You'll see. Lots of wizards get better later on - hell, I heard Merlin failed a few classes his first year -"

"It's okay, Ginny. Seriously. Here, come on." He opened the door, sounding way too resigned. "Ron's trunk is over there." Though Ginny could have guessed that - Ron's things were strewn all over the floor, just like at home.

Frowning, she walked over to his bed, forgetting all about Longbottom for a second. She cautiously picked up one of the robes that'd been left on top of the trunk and regretted it. Didn't Ron use the laundry?

Finally, she found the package. It'd already been ripped apart, and the homemade sweets their mum had sent was scattered across the bed. But Ginny suddenly smiled when she saw an untouched box with her name on it in her mum's loopy script. Something could -

They were oranges. Small, bright oranges - really, they smelled quite nice, but that wasn't the point. Ginny didn't even read the note. It was the same each time, and anyways, who needed it written out why she only got oranges. At least they'd moved on from Madame Berry's Magically Slimming whatever they were. Merlin. She'd puked every time.

She scowled as she angrily walked out of the boys' room, only to nearly get hit by the door as Seamus and Dean walked in. "Hey, Gin," Seamus told her, with a smirking leer that made her want to pull a blanket over herself. Instead she settled for trying not to run to her room, and instead felt like a fucking coward for not saying anything at all.

Harry frowned as he paced around the hallways leading out of the common room again. If only he knew who had found him and taken him to Madame Pomfrey... but it'd raise too many questions now to go an ask her. Why didn't I just ask her then? Idiot...

He rubbed the side of his head, feeling a headache coming on. Now that he'd gotten a routine down once more, he was training each night again. He should get back to it. This whole thing was a lost cause anyways. And Sirius had pointed him towards some helpful books to read the last time they'd spoken - well, spoken and not spoken. Sirius hadn't said a word about his outburst those weeks ago, which made it all the more worse.

"Harry?" He jumped, ready to deny any and all responsibility for whatever someone wanted to accuse him of, when he saw Fia move next to him.

"Oh. Hi," he said, a little awkwardly, trying his best to look innocent. "What's up?"

She looked down the dark - and, even for Slytherin, admittedly creepy - hallway and back at him. "... what are you doing?"

"Um, nothing," he said, leaning back against the wall and jumping again as he nearly fell into a torch. "I mean - um - I just wanted to go for a walk. What are you doing, anyways?" he said, changing course. Not that that ever worked with Fia, he realized after a moment of mild stupidity, and cringed.

"Hermione said you'd wandered down here," Fia said, a little quiet. He was surprised she didn't press him on the topic until she finally said the reason for her visit. "I talked to father."

"Oh," Harry said awkwardly. "I - um - yeah... so you know about Christmas, then?"

Fia nodded.

"Well, it'll be fun here," he told her with a forced smile, trying to cheer her up. "Plenty of students stay for the holidays. And Hogwarts is basically like home -"

"Not really," she said dully. He barely caught what she said with her voice so quiet.

"Well, screw that," Harry said after a pause. "We'll have fun down here then. The dormitories are only for us Slytherins. And besides, they'll catch Lestrange soon. And then they'll stop watching the house." Again, he added reflexively.

"Yeah," she agreed halfheartedly. "I'm gonna go to bed," Fia said abruptly. "Night."

"Night," Harry said after her, but she didn't respond. He took a moment, and then turned back to the dark hallway with newfound determination. Training could wait.

Sirius nearly missed the mirror heating up. He'd been out on the edge of the staircase, watching Rhia put the tree up with Kreacher and Narcissa's help. It was a lonely Christmas without the children running about - but...

The mirror interrupted his thoughts, and he struggled for a second to fish it out of his pocket. Sirius went back into the library so he could sit down.

"Harry?"

The boy's face appeared as a flicker at first, but then the image sharpened.

"Hi, Sirius," Harry said quietly. It looked like he was in his room at school, the books still strewn over the desk. With a smile, Sirius noted that Harry had had a growth spurt that fall - he'd have to tell Rhia later. And some of the open books were what he'd recommended to him.

"How is school going?" Sirius prodded, when Harry didn't say anything more. There didn't seem to be a particular reason Harry was calling, which was - well, better than it had been in months. Harry'd barely used it second year, and if he'd had a way to check in on him without alerting someone's suspicions, he would have.

"Fine," he replied with a shrug. "Okay. Professor Snape taught us some interesting potions this week before break started."

"Ah." Sirius tried to think of something that would get Harry to talk more. "Fia seems to be enjoying herself over break," he told the boy.

"Oh," Harry said with a surprised smile. "She is?"

"Yes, she was telling me about your games in the common room," he told his charge. "I'm sorry you couldn't come home, but she couldn't stop talking about how much fun it is. And how you're tutoring her, of course. She was really excited about that - "

"It wasn't anything big," Harry said hastily, sounding a bit guilty. "Just small stuff. Magical theory and -"

"Harry, it's fine," Sirius told him with a laugh. "I wouldn't have given you those books if I wasn't okay with you - both of you - learning that."

"But you said to be careful with it...?"

"I mean, don't go telling the teachers what you're learning. But it's not illegal," Sirius reassured him. "You're learning theory, not dark magic."

"Oh," Harry repeated. "Um -" Sirius let him think of the words to say. "Oh." He frowned. "Sirius - can - can I ask you something...?"

"Of course." Sirius' brain scrambled, trying to think of what Harry might want to ask. He'd already called that morning to ask if there'd been any news about Lily. Every other morning, really. He would have done anything to ease the disappointment out of the boy's eyes.

"Why... why did you join the Death Eaters?" Harry blurted out.

Sirius took a breath. To be honest, he'd been expecting the question for a while now. Once he'd learned that not only had Fia gotten ahold of the diary, but that Harry had as well - and that they knew who was in it.

"For family - no, I -" Sirius hesitated a bit. "I wasn't forced," he told him at last, remembering his brother, laying at death's door. "But we were at war, and I felt it was the right decision to make."

"But you didn't join until after you left school...? I mean, Draco said his dad had joined while still at Hogwarts," Harry added.

"Draco shouldn't have said anything," Sirius said with a frown. "Lucius - well, never mind about all that. But yes, he did join during school. There were quite a few who did. But no, I didn't." He saw the next question on Harry's face. "It didn't feel right at the time. Circumstances changed, after."

"With my mother?"

"Not precisely, no." Sirius tried to find the right words, trying his best to remember how little Harry knew about the situation. Merlin, Lily hadn't even told him Potter was his father. He shifted course. "Why are you asking?"

"I - um." Harry took a deep breath. "Do I have to - do I have to join?" His voice quieted to barely a whisper.

"Merlin -" Sirius' brain scrambled for a moment. "Harry, no. You're a third year. Even if you wanted to make a decision like that right now, I wouldn't let you."

Harry looked a little surprised at that, which tore into Sirius. "You wouldn't...? But Potter - and Draco said his father -"

"Harry - Merlin, ignore what Draco says. That's his parents, not yours. And ignore what Potter is doing." Sirius paused, trying to remember that Harry wasn't the person he should be mad at. He closed his eyes for a moment. "Harry," he repeated, more calm this time. "You should be focusing on school right now, not worrying about a war that isn't even going on. You're too young to be picking sides or what have you. And -"

"But then why are you training me?" Harry cut in. "Why did To - why are you giving me these books?"

Sirius pretended not to catch Harry's slip. "Because you should be in the position to make a choice when it comes time to, Harry." His gaze was unwavering. "I won't pretend you won't ever have to make a choice - but when you do, make sure you have options. Make sure you have the power to make the choice you want to make, not because someone is forcing you into it. They'll try to force you, don't doubt that. But that doesn't mean you have to do what they want."

"And what about what you want me to do?" Harry asked, his voice still wavering.

Sirius hesitated. "I won't pretend you don't know which side I'm on, Harry, but you will always have a place here."

Harry didn't say anything, so Sirius tried to prod him gently a bit further. "Harry - is there any other reason you're asking these questions?"

"No," Harry said, but his brightness didn't fool Sirius. "Thanks - thank you, Sirius," he said. "I really appreciate it."

"Of course, Harry," Sirius told him. "Just give me a call - I'll be around the house for the next few weeks."

The mirror shut down after Harry said his goodbyes once more. But Sirius stayed in his chair for a moment more, ruminating on what Harry had and hadn't said. Oh, Sirius did believe he was concerned over what he was learning - and Sirius kicked himself for not checking the book over more carefully to see precisely what might have worried him, but what was done was done, and it was a very good book to cover intermediate theory - and he was likely concerned over the pressure to join a side. Sirius had been, at least, though he'd been in Gryffindor at that age... but Harry showed such promise. An unusual strength, even for his age, and even if he couldn't quite place his affinity...

"Is Harry well?" Rhia asked from her spot in the doorway.

"Yes," Sirius said, a little surprised by his wife's welcome interruption. "Yes, yes he is," he repeated, more firmly this time.

"You're troubled, though." Rhia told him.

"A bit," Sirius confessed frankly. "After the events of the diary - well, he's better than he was last year, but he still won't tell me what happened."

"He's a teenager," Rhia informed him, shrugging. "They rarely do. Did you, at that age?"

"He's barely a teenager!" Sirius protested lightheartedly. "I don't know." He shook his head, turning more serious. "Were we really that sheltered? It never seemed that crazed at Hogwarts when we were there... Even with the war going on."

"No, not at Hogwarts." Rhia paused. "There were attacks going on - but outside. We were sheltered. It's taken a different tone, the war now."

"Funny," Sirius said dryly. "I was under the impression the war was over."

"Yes," Rhia said, but she wasn't really responding to him. His wife walked over to the windows, looking down at the streets below. "They're still watching," she said abruptly.

"Let them," Sirius told her, not moving from his chair. "We're not doing anything wrong."

"Then why wouldn't they let Fia and Draco home for Christmas?" Rhia said angrily, yanking the curtains closed. She started to pace like a trapped animal. "You didn't tell them, did you? Or Harry?" she asked suddenly, worry overtaking the anger.

"What good would that do?" Sirius asked quietly. "Better to let them think there was still a choice involved. And if Fia knew - after what Dumbledore did last year -"

"Yes, of course," Rhia said, beginning to pace again. "She's doing better, though," she said dully. "I just feel useless..."

"It'll be over soon." Sirius tried to reassure her, but felt out of his depth. Rhia was usually the one who calmed him down, not the other way around.

"Of course." Rhia shook her head, and walked over to the table, blindly leafing through a few of the parchments lying there. The order that came from Longbottom she avoided like a hot fire. "Do you think Dumbledore knows?" she asked.

"I don't know," Sirius admitted, getting up to join his wife. "Longbottom clearly knows something, otherwise he wouldn't have ordered that the children be kept at Hogwarts." His hands traced the cruel curl of the letters on the page. "For their safety, of course." He snorted. Fia and Draco's names stood out as if written in blood.

"Won't Bellatrix tell you why?" Rhia asked, her hand moving to grasp his.

"No," Sirius told her unwillingly. "I don't believe she can."

"Does it bother you?" Rhia asked abruptly. "The Dark Lord, using them as pawns?"

Sirius looked at their hands entwined on the table. "Is he?" he asked, but talking mostly to himself. "Dumbledore does - well, he does with every student who walks through those doors."

Rhia sighed. "I just wish I knew what He had told Fia last year," she confessed. "She never said a word to me about it."

"Well, she's not practicing Dark magic in her rooms yet," Sirius reminded her. "We would have known."

"Draco's started learning," Rhia whispered. "When do you think...?"

"I think what we talked about is still fine," Sirius told her. "By fourth year, she'll be ready for more advanced magic. I've already given her books to study on theory while she's at Hogwarts."

"It wouldn't be a problem if they actually taught them properly," Rhia said with a frown. "But - still - the diary didn't bother you...?"

Sirius pursed his lips. "What would we have done?" he asked her. "I can only question the Dark Lord so far. At a certain point, we have to have faith."

"Faith," Rhia echoed. "Well, nothing is perfect," she said quietly, though whether she was trying to reassure him or herself more, Sirius couldn't tell.

Ginny whistled to herself as she wandered through the library, trying to look as aimless as possible. Thankfully she'd lost her brother and Potter as soon as she mentioned the word library. Ugh. She felt like an idiot. She'd been so excited at the chance to return to Hogwarts a few days sooner that she hadn't paid attention to how they'd return to Hogwarts sooner, and her mum's face when she thought Ginny wanted to go with Potter... ugh.

Outside, the snow was building against the windows. It was rather quiet in the library. Madame Pince wasn't at her desk yet, though a few of the older students were studying at the tables. No one spared a glance for her - though if anything, that made her more paranoid. Easier to get lost in a crowd. That was what she liked about the Gryffindor.

She ducked into one of the darker corners as soon as she was able. The Hogwarts library was a grand space, but a labyrinth, leading one down twists and turns until you lost yourself utterly. As she turned down one of the paths, the light seemed to dim - though whether that was her imagination or the time getting later, she wasn't sure.

Finally, she found the bookcase that had seemed so promising before break. Harry had only shown her the map briefly before she'd had to leave that night, but something - interest? curiosity? - drove her further. Or, maybe, just the knowledge that she could be tracked. But if she knew how - could she stop it?

Her fingers traced the spine of one book briefly. Most of the titles flew over her head. It wasn't quite the restricted section, but neither was it an area where second years typically roamed.

Ginny jumped as a shiver went down her back - but when she looked around, no one was there. She gulped, trying to calm her suddenly racing heart. It was just the flickering lights. Nothing more. No one was there.

Still, she grabbed a few of the books that looked promising and tried her best to calmly walk over to one of the tables, turning around the corner -

"Oh, hi Ginny," Neville said.

Ginny nearly jumped out of her skin. "Oh - um, hi." She took a deep breath when she realized it was just Neville.

"What - what are you doing here?" Neville's usual nervousness was surprisingly reassuring.

"Oh. Just reading up about something McGonagall mentioned in class," Ginny said, blanking for a moment. "It was a little boring just being in the common room all day. What - did you come back early...?" she asked, trying to find something to say.

Neville stood there a bit awkwardly. "Yeah, something like that," he said, ducking his head. "Sorry, I should - I have to get a book, for - for, um, homework..."

"Right, of course," Ginny replied quickly, grateful he wasn't sticking around. She let him squeeze past her, and turned around to go to the table, burying herself in the reading in the hours until dinner.

"Hermione?"

The witch in question was curled up deeply in one of the common room's emerald armchairs and currently enthralled in a book.

"Mhm?" Hermione answered, not looking up.

"Good book?" Tracey asked, eyebrow raised. When the witch didn't really respond, she flopped onto a couch nearby. "Hermioneeeee," she whined jokingly. "I'm bored. Come on, you've been reading for ages."

She nearly laughed when Hermione did look up slightly at that, but the girl continued to ignore her. But it only took another minute for the witch to crack.

"Fine," Hermione said with a yawn. "I'm done with the chapter anyways. So why are you bothering me?" But she smiled at Tracey.

"Oh, you love me," Tracey said with a grin. "Admit it." She pouted when Hermione rolled her eyes instead. "So, whatcha reading? It's only the first week of classes, you can't have that much work already."

"Oh." Hermione glanced down. "Nothing much. Just - well, some reading up on magical adoptions." She tried to keep her voice light.

"Oh." Tracey didn't say anything for a moment, and then swung herself up to a sitting position. She tried not to sound too serious or too light, and kind of failed at both. "You - because your... what happened this summer?" She winced internally as soon as the words came out of her mouth.

"Yeah," Hermione said awkwardly. She fidgeted a bit in her seat.

"I - well, there's not too much to them," Tracey said with a shrug. "It's a mix of simple magic and actual law. Once the parents accept the kid, it'll be legal and their magic will recognize them. No one's actually done that much work on the subject, I think." She'd only searched once or a thousand times, anyways.

"Right..." Hermione said gingerly.

Tracey bit her lip. "So," she said suddenly, trying to break the tension. "What did you think of the essay for History?"

"Not too bad," Hermione said automatically. "I mean, I'm nearly done with it," she said, going back. "I just need to read up a little on Aquinas' Summa Theologica, but it'll be done after that. And then Ptolemy, of course -"

Tracey zoned out a bit as Hermione went on. One of her favorite things to do was delve into a subject - not that it was a bad thing, but there was a reason Snape had called her the brightest witch of their generation. Tracey's star, in comparison, shined just a little dimmer. Though she knew it was a little mean, Tracey did take just the smallest satisfaction in remembering Hermione wasn't perfect in every area. Well, for now, she amended, thinking back to how social Hermione had become since their first year. Tracey grinned a little. She's really going to be a force to be reckoned with.

" - so anyways, once that's done, I'll have the essay complete. I know Binns didn't ask for it, but the philosophy behind the church culture of the thirteenth century is just so fascinating," Hermione said, smiling deeply. "Oh - I'm so sorry," she added sheepishly, as the clock struck the hour. "I didn't realize the time! Here - let's go hang out in the dorm." She picked herself up, slipping the book into her bag.

Tracey yawned, following. Not that she minded in the slightest.