I have kissed Peeta many times, real or not real? Real. Peeta has kissed me even more. Real, very real. I wasn't a good kisser, most likely, but I knew how to kiss Peeta. This kiss though made all other kisses fade. Did we ever really kiss? Was this our first one? It had to be. All kisses before it were there as practice, to build up to this one right now. I didn't know what was different, but it was. Maybe it was the fact that no one would ever be able to turn on the television and see a replay of it. Maybe it was because I truly initiated it, my rain soaked fingers finding purchase in his blond hair. Maybe it was because neither of us were about to die, and it was a kiss just so that it could be a kiss, and nothing else. The storm raged on outside, and I felt a sort of storm rage within me as well. I kissed him, and he kissed me back. Even after everything, I had this still.

Peeta's hands were at my waist, holding, pulling me closer. His lips were against mine, hard, and I wondered if when we finally parted (would we?) they'd be swollen. I pushed forward, and soon found that I had him against a wall. I wanted to laugh in triumph, but instead focused on the feeling of the small curls of his hair at the edge of his neck and the feeling of holding his bottom lip in between my two. His lips were soft and he was warm. I pushed harder into him, and my tongue flicked at his lip. His mouth opened, mine as well in response, and his hands found my bare skin underneath my soaked shirt. Goosebumps flew through my skin where he touched but his hands were warm upon me. I wondered fleetingly, if he was drawing before I came into his room unannounced like this, if he had his fingers stained with charcoal, if he was leaving sweeps of the charcoal upon my skin where he touched.

His hands found my lower back, and I gasped a bit in surprise. I put my mind back to the task at hand, and cupped his face with my one hand while the other was still buried in his hair. He needed a haircut, I realized, but moved that out of my head. I almost felt dizzy but I wasn't, almost felt lightheaded but was present in the situation. I was aware of everything around me, everything that was Peeta. I thought to back to how I used to every now and then felt a hunger when I kissed Peeta, one that felt like it'd never stop. That was foolish. This was not a hunger, this was a storm that raged more than the one outside, and one that couldn't be stopped

But it did stop. Peeta's hands found my wrists and he pulled me away for a bit. I opened my eyes and we stared at each other, grey finding blue in the dimly lit room. Our breath was short and we both leaned against each other panting. I didn't feel like myself, I felt like someone new. And I think I liked it, I liked feeling like this, overall just feeling. "Katniss." Peeta's voice was low and I wanted to kiss him again, to feel again and to hold him against me. He said my name again and I looked up to his eyes, not realizing that my eyes wandered to stare at his lips.

"What?" My voice was a whisper and low too, and maybe I should have blushed at it but I couldn't find it in me to.

"Why are you kissing me?" I looked and saw he was confused, and his eyes seemed to threaten to darken. Were they like that out of desire? Or was I pulling him into an episode?

I stepped a bit away from him, but his hands were still on my wrists and he clenched them and pulled me close to him again. "Do you not want me to?" I asked in a small voice, not looking up at him.

He chuckled, and I turned to look at him again. His eyes seemed light and there was a smirk on him, and I felt relief. He wasn't about to have an episode, at least yet. "I want to know why you're kissing me."

I scowled at him then. "Because I want to."

He brought a scowl to his face as well. He was trying to keep it playful, but I could see that there was a darkness trying to invade. He let go of my wrists though, and I rubbed them hoping that they'd not bruise. Peeta pushed off the wall a bit and away from me. "Katniss I just told you that I loved you and then you decide to jump into my window and kiss me. I need time to sort my head out, and so do you." He turned to look at me. "Just take some time to think about everything before you react for once, please? We don't need to kiss for cameras or anything anymore, and so every time you kiss me and don't mean it it's going to hurt. So just...think before you try and do that, alright?"

I shook my head. "I don't regret it. And I did think about it. I told you, I needed to think, and I did. I came up with the fact that I wanted to kiss you." I felt awkward talking about this. When was the last time I had to talk about something like this, about wanting to kiss someone? Never, right. Sure, I've felt it before, felt it a couple of times with Peeta, but I never had to voice it. I felt rather foolish having to put it in words, and wished he'd shut up and not want to talk about this all and just kiss me again.

"Well maybe you should have spent more time thinking about it." His voice was getting more cutting.

I fought a bit of anger. I understood where he was coming from, and how it was my fault. I haven't been the most thoughtful of his feelings in the past, truth be told. I fought the anger, but it was more anger towards myself, and how I've put a doubt in him. It was an anger towards the Capitol. I let myself think fleetingly about how this would all be if he was never hijacked, if he was rescued from the Capitol with mental and emotional bruises and scars, but his hands were able to wrap around me instead of my throat. No, I told myself. That is a dangerous path to think down. "I have thought about it, Peeta. I've wanted to kiss you for a while."

He cocked his head at me. "Really?"

I blushed. Finally, after everything of the night a blush formed upon me. Why did he need to talk about this? "There were a couple of times that I've wanted to kiss you, but I fought against it," I mumbled and looked away.

"Like when?"

I looked up and saw that he had a goofy smile on. I huffed. I didn't want to talk about this at all, and he knew it. "I don't know, a couple of times. In the forest on my birthday. I don't know, Peeta."

He looked as if he was going to step closer to me, but then his smile fell and he turned a bit away from me and sighed. "Well it's getting late. Are you staying over?"

Thunder boomed right as he asked that, as if to remind me of the pouring rain. I wanted to go back to my house and lay under my sheets in embarrassment, really. I don't know what I exactly expected to happen with the resolution that I wanted to kiss him, but talking wasn't on my agenda. I didn't want to face the rain or the storm though. So I nodded. "Yes. Let me borrow sleeping clothes." I wanted to regain some power, and demanded that a bit from him.

But he just shook his head with a smile back on and went to his dresser, handing me a pair of shorts and a tshirt. I went to the bathroom to wash up and change, and when I was back Peeta was already laying in bed. He was just in his boxers, probably on purpose. Probably trying to see if even though I climbed up a tree and jumped into his room to kiss him, if I'd say something about his almost nudity. I wanted to scoff, but held it in. I wouldn't let myself react.

I laid on my side of the bed and went under the covers. And then I thought about that. My side? When did it become my side of the bed? I tried to change it in my mind. I laid on the other side of the bed than Peeta. But this was the side I always slept on, no matter what bed we were on, honestly. I was overthinking things, and should probably just try to sleep.

We were on opposite sides again and as far apart as possible. Peeta made sure of that. I held in a growl. No, we were going to sleep on my terms. And I wanted to be close, to feel the warmth from his body and wake up and have his arms around me solidifying the fact that I was in fact just dreaming whatever nightmare came to my mind. Peeta's eyes were closed, so I moved closer to him quietly and wrapped my arms around his stomach. His hands were against his chest, so I put my head against them and shut my eyes. I could feel him tense slightly as he opened his eyes and looked down at me. "Katniss..." His voice sounded a bit strained, but he didn't look like he was close to a flashback.

"Don't worry Peeta, I thought long and hard about this," I said, mocking. A pause, and then he chuckled and I could feel his breath against my hair. His hands unwound from his chest and found their way around me. I pressed my face against his chest and suppressed a smile over my victory.

I fell asleep quick enough, apparently exhausted over the night. It was a long night though. My talk with Peeta alone could have made me tired enough, what with my escapades afterwards truly tired me out. Nightmares came and swirled through me, but upon waking I couldn't remember anything really, just flickers of blood and ash. Peeta's arms were still around me and he was still asleep. The sun was coming up, and I needed to get started on my day. I tried to make my way out of his embrace without waking him, but I felt him tense and hold me hard against hisself when I started to fidget.

"Where are you going?" He asked, his voice graveled from sleep.

"I have to get ready and go into town," I told him, trying to pull away.

His eyes were still closed and I felt him smile against my hair. "No. Stay."

And I was so comfortable in bed and with Peeta that all I did really want to do was stay. But I couldn't. I had to go into town. I had to work on the bakery for Peeta. "No. I'm going."

"Not if I don't let you." His arms tightened. I was a bit caught off guard from it all. It had been really so long since Peeta had been this playful and happy. I wondered if the tracker jacker venom really was finally making it's way out of him. Not fully of course, I never would let myself expect that. But maybe, laying the cards out on the table like we did yesterday helped. Or maybe it was a coincidence. I didn't know, but I didn't have time to think it over just laying here.

I pushed away from him and finally got out of his grasp. "Peeta, I have to shower and get ready." I sat on his bed and he looked up at me. "I'll come over when I'm done and we can have dinner together, alright?"

He smiled and put his hand on my shoulder. "Alright," he whispered, putting pressure on my shoulder. Confused, I bent down and he placed a quick kiss on my forehead. I sat back up and looked at him with a cocked eyebrow. He laughed. "I'll see you later tonight, Katniss."

The day seemed to go by fast enough. I was able to have a clear mind while I worked and concentrated only on whatever was in front of me, the foundation going up rather smoothly. When I went to lunch at Greasy Sae's, I was actually able to give her a response when she asked about Peeta. I told her that he was doing well, and she looked at me surprised since I said something besides a mumbled indirect answer. She smiled at me, and told me to tell him to come by for lunch with me sometime. I told him I'd pass the invitation on, although I really wasn't sure if I would. Peeta still didn't know what I was doing in the town, and I was sure how he'd take it yet. He still needed time, and taking him to Greasy Sae's would open up the questions of what I was doing.

My arms ached when I was going back home for the day. When I got to my house, I saw one of Haymitch's geese in my front yard eating my grass. I grumbled under my breath, and made my way over to the stupid creature to herd it back to Haymitch's. I wished that Buttercup could be trained like one of those dogs, and herd them. I almost started laughing to myself at the visual of that, but didn't as the goose almost bit me. "Watch it, you stupid goose," I muttered to it and started to get it to cross the street to Haymitch's. "You should be glad I don't shoot you and have you for dinner. You'd make an excellent main course you know."

"You're not going to be shooting any of my geese until I don't have any liquor to deal with their honkings. And when you do, I'm trusting Peeta to cook it and I'll be given the biggest portion." Haymitch was on his porch, and watched as I struggled with his goose.

I looked at him, angry. "Really? You're right there and just let me struggle with this feathered beast of yours and didn't help?"

He barked a laugh and took a drink from his liquor. "What, and miss out on the fun of watching you try to herd a goose like it was a sheep? You're really good at that, by the way. Maybe there's another hidden talent of yours." I shook my head and went to walk away. "How's the husband, sweetheart?"

That stopped me short. Husband? I turned to Haymitch. I think there was a permanent scowl on my face whenever I talked to him. "Dammit Haymitch, you of all people know that we didn't get married." He laughed again, and I got angrier and crossed my arms.

"Fine, what do you want me to tack on to him? Lover boy? Boyfriend? Fiance? You guys were engaged, after all."

I wondered what Haymitch would do if I wasn't around for him to poke fun at. Probably drown himself in his liquor and be pecked to death by those stupid geese. It'd be worth it almost not to come out of my house to give him that fate. "We're just friends," I told him sternly. "Call him Peeta."

"Friends, huh? Friends that kiss and hold hands and sleep in the same bed?"

I felt myself blush and I stuttered. "How did you know that?"

He smiled triumphantly. "I was guessing. But you proved me right."

I turned from him and ignored all of his continued laughter. "Goodbye, Haymitch."

As I showered and dressed, Haymitch's words were stuck in my head. What was Peeta to me? I didn't know. I didn't want to tack anything onto it. We went through the Hunger Games twice, we went through a war, we went through too much. And here we were. So I decided I wouldn't try and put a name on it. We just were. After dressing and getting my hair in a braid, I looked out my window and was happy to see that Haymitch was nowhere to be found. Did he just go out there when he knew I was coming home? I wanted to get mad at him and how much he poked fun at me, but I couldn't find it in me after it all. The three of us only had each other, and if him reaching out would be getting on my nerves, I'd just have to deal with it. I made my way over to Peeta's quickly and let myself in. There was food being prepared in the kitchen, but it was empty. "Peeta?" I called out, and heard a crash from upstairs in response. I felt my body chill instantly. I almost felt comfortable with the lack of episodes that Peeta has had over the past day or so, that the fact that one was happening right now caught me off guard. No running though. I sighed and put on a determined face as I made my way upstairs.

So I tried updating this late last night but it wouldn't show? Ugh stupid. Here's hoping it shows now :c

Terribly sorry about how long this took to get out! I've been scrambled in my mind as of late, as well as working hard at my AU. Also, there was a ficathon going on on lj that I did a good amount of prompts to, which maybe I'll post on here if people would be interested in a shorter form of my writing?

Anyway, let's talk about the movie quick! LOT'S OF FEELINGS that's all I can really say I guess without going into a really long rant. The first time I saw it I saw it by myself and afterwards I had to pace the mall for a half hour with all of my pent up nerves. It was so good though, right?

Thanks for sticking with me y'all, and reading and reviewing! We finally had them kiss yes! And this chapter is a bit more light than I usually right, so I guess enjoy? I don't know how much long this'll be, but not too much longer. So sorry about leaving it at that cliffhanger, but oops here's another haha. I'll try and update sooner than I got to updating this one, alright? :) Hope you have a great day etc etc~