Chapter 14

Can't Take it Back

The early morning of April 15th, 1912 was one of the longest morning's Clara Moore had ever endured. The ship had snapped in half and Lowe let them know the time when it finally succumbed to the icy cold Atlantic; 2:40 am. The screams was the worst of all, people crying for help; for the nearby lifeboats to return.

"Ladies," Lowe stood up in the boat, "We have to go back. I want to row over to the other boats to transport you all to the emptier ones and then I will go back for survivors."

Clara looked at Harold, "What can I do to help?"

Harold looked down at her, "We will need help rowing but if you are too tired, the boys and I can manage."

She nodded and moved over to where the oars were waiting to be taken up. The work was long and hard, and by the time they met up with the other boats, Clara's arms ached from the strain, but she never complained; not even once.

It took hours for them to finally get settled in other boats and Clara watched in silence as boat fourteen rowed back towards the wreckage, but it had become so quiet, no one had screamed in a very long time.

"When will this nightmare be over?" she whispered.

But no one answered her, he people in the boat were either too tired or too numb from shock to answer. Again, when boat fourteen returned, no one said much. There was movement to see what few had been pulled from the water, but no one in the immediate area recognized the passengers. It was another long couple of hours before the sun began to rise, Clara's eyes ached from exhaustion and she would have been content to fall asleep right there, at last, if a ship had not come into sight right there.

"It's the rescue ship!" someone shouted.

Clara turned in her seat to look towards the liner that was carefully sailing towards them. The ship was not nearly as big as the Titanic and in bold letters on the side it said "CARPATHIA," and people were looking over the side of the ship at the lifeboats below.

Ropes, ladders, and even nets with bags in them for small children began to be lowered down and slowly it came to be Clara's time to climb up the ladder. She clutched the sides of the rope ladder tightly and slowly she began to climb. Her legs screamed in agony with each step, they had been cramped up for so long in such a small space, that to put them through this much work without allowing them to stretch properly and wake up caused her a significant amount of pain.

"Mrs. Moore, oh thank God," she heard someone whisper as she made it over the side of the ship.

Small arms wrapped around her body and she found herself collapsing into the arms of a stewardess, "I've got ya miss, I've got ya."

Clara reached up and grabbed the straps of the girls apron, "Am I finally out of the lifeboat?" she asked quietly.

"Yes miss, you're going to be okay. It is okay."

Clara nodded and cast her glance back to the ladder as more people climbed up. Naomi and Hope were holding each other as they walked over to her. The stewardess who had been holding Clara, helped her get into a deck chair to sit, and the three women sat in silence for a long time. They were offered tea as they waited and blankets, which Clara took gratefully. When the boats had been divided up, Esther had moved to another boat so when she finally boarded the Carpathia she went directly over to Clara and sat with her. Every time someone climbed up that wasn't the men they loved, the three women grew more and more anxious but at last, a netting was brought up with a bag of three small children and the smallest boy stepped out, looking around wildly and confused, and Clara saw her boy.

The porcelin tea cup fell from her hands and shattered on the ships deck into a million pieces. Almost everyone looked up at the sound of the breaking china and they watched as Clara ran and fell to her knees as she pulled Benjamin into her arms.

"Mummy!" the child squealed in delight.

"Oh my sweet boy," she murmured, holding him as close to her as she could, "Oh you had me so worried."

"I'm sorry mummy," the boy said, "I tried ta find you but I got lost."

"I know little love," Clara quickly wiped the tears from her eyes, "I know."

People were climbing up from the boat now, this one had the fewest amount, so it was not long at all until Herbert Pittman climbed over the side of the ship. He looked around for Benjamin and then his eyes fell on the mother and son before him.

"Clara," he breathed.

Clara stared up at him and tears welled in her eyes. She stood to her full height and without thinking, she grabbed him by the hand, told Esther to take her son, and she pulled Herbert with her until they found a doorway into a quiet hall. In the darkness Clara pulled him to her and pushed her lips against his, with such a ferocity, that his hat fell off in the fumbling.

"Thank you," she said in between the kisses, "Thank you for keeping him safe."

Herbert's arms snaked around her waist as he held her tightly, their lips were still fused together and they did not think they would ever separate. The door however opened and the bright sunlight of April 15th streamed into the room and the two jumped apart almost instantly as people began to come through the door, being lead to dining rooms and places to rest.

"You two could have at least waited a moment before you jumped at each other."

Clara looked up to see Harold Lowe coming in with the groups of people and she threw her arms around him, "Thank you for everything you did last night."

"Of course Clara," he said and winked at Herbert, "You would have been proud, she helped to row for about forty-five minutes last night."

Herbert eyed Clara with pride, "Thank you Harold, truly."

"I better get back to Benjamin and see if the girls found their husbands," Clara pecked Harold on the cheek and then walked back out onto the deck.

Herbert followed close behind and by the time they made it to the others, Naomi was tightly embracing Robert and Hope was also in the arms of her husband, but there was no sign of David.

"Mummy!" Benjamin cried when he saw his mother again.

Clara walked over to him and picked her son up and held him tightly. She bit her lip and asked the question she had been avoiding, "Have you seen David?"

Robert pulled away from Naomi and sighed at the sight of Clara and David. "Clara, we tried to stay together," he began slowly, "But we got separated and," he shrugged, "James and I were rescued on the lifeboat that was upside down. We had to swim to it, but after we hit the water we lost David."

Clara felt her knees go weak at the words, she hated David and wanted nothing more but to leave, but the idea of him dead...floating in the water or at the bottom of the ocean with the Titanic, was bone chilling. She set Benjamin down and her knees began to shake.

"Ma'am, are you okay?" Esther asked gently.

Clara shook her head, "I...I need some air," was all she managed, despite the fact that they were outside.

She walked away from the others and down the deck and then her knees gave out and she collapsed.

Xx

A/N-Short chapter, I know. I have to work, but I am not running shift tonight so...I shall probably start the next one when I get home. Leave me love to read during my break! Love you guys, you're the best. Xo