A/N: Okay, so I kinda broke my promise about updating immediately if people reviewed - did I promise that? (I hope I didn't...) - but, hey, at least I updated, right? :D And, just to make up for it, I made it extra long. ;D Lmao. Soooooo wrong the way that came out. Eh, it's not like you kiddos are strangers to that, right? Haha. So, here ya go, eh! Lol.
P.S. Just to let you know, this has Naruto in it... aaaaand, well, a little extra something, too, but I won't spoil it up here. :P Sasuke and Naruto will NOT be making out, if that's what you people are hoping for. You really think I would make them do that after they just broke up? You really think I'd put that in there? -_-'
P.P.S. ...Honestly, for a minute, I considered putting it in there. :O But thank the Heavens above I had restraint! XD
Anyway, enough of my rambling; Enjoy! :)
F A T
Over the week, I seem to be gaining many more friends. I never really thought it was possible that my circle of friends would grow into something more substantial as such. I actually even thought I would be friendless at some point, but it wasn't that way at all. It went so much better than that. More people seemed to know who I was as the week went by. All thanks to Shion, Tayuya, and Kagura. Each day they seemed to be talking to someone new in the time that I would hang out with them. And each day they would find the time to introduce me. And Pein, since he hangs out with the lot of us as well.
Mind you, the people they acquainted themselves with weren't just popular people, but they were people from all walks of life and cliques and upbringings. And they were all nice to one another. Well, Shion and Tayuya were. Kagura was, at least, civil. One could easily tell from the look on her face that she didn't like people, especially different, odd people that Tayuya and Shion interacted with. I liked them. They were everyday normal people, but I guess Kagura wasn't a fan of that, considering how high her standards are of the way she views herself. And of the way she views the world, by the way she wrinkles her nose at even the slightest odd sense of behavior coming from anyone. I suppose she suspected everyone to be perfect in this world, or something, because it looked as though she was constantly disappointed. Especially when she was with Kiba. Like he didn't give her enough attention or something, which was stupid, considering he spent most of her time trying to please her, which only pissed her off. Who knew why?
Despite that, though, my life is coming together quite nicely. Although, I haven't gotten much homework done - since there rarely is any - I do seem to be building up quite the social life. Everyday my phone is being blown up by text messages, and, by the time I get to each and every single one, I have to respond to another text message in which I responded to earlier. Which, in exchange for all that of my social life, I have much less sleeping time to catch up on. It doesn't bother me. It wasn't like I ever got much sleep, anyway. I actually felt normal, like I was wanted, like I was loved. I finally felt like I was part of the in-crowd. I never knew what it felt like. I always wanted to know. It always seemed to me as though Sakura had it going pretty well in her life. I mean, I had it good as well, but she basically went out every night with her other friends, did stupid shit, went on dates, took road trips - everything. Yet she still had time to get good grades, maintain a healthy dosage of sleep, and have a steady supply of boyfriends all throughout her four years of school here. I never thought a thing like that was possible. Superhuman that my best friend was to handle all of that and not stress about it. Props to her for not crumbling over the excess stress of worrying about college, too.
If I were under that kind of pressure, I probably would have catapulted myself off a cliff if I ever got the chance. Which I doubt that I would do, considering how much I'm loving life right about now. I still can't seem to bring myself to believe it all. I think it's a dream. Is it a dream? I don't think so. I mean, it feels real and all, but, I don't know, it just doesn't exactly FEEL all too real. Maybe it's just the way everything's working out for me so easily. It feels like a prank.
However, the sheer reality of it all keeps me in check. Everything is real. Nothing is fake. Everything that I'm feeling, everything that I'm seeing, everything that I'm saying or thinking or anyone and everything I'm coming into contact with - it's all real. No matter what I want to think, or what keeps me thinking like that. I couldn't believe it. I can't even bring myself to believe that so many things have changed coming into this year so far, that I've actually stuck through with my purpose and goals in life and achieved them. Who knew it was all that simple? All I needed was dedication and a strong will of mind.
Now that I looked at myself in the mirror, I didn't see the Sasuke I hated anymore. I saw the Sasuke I strived to be, and, because of that Sasuke I deemed myself to be, I sometimes lost track of time in merely staring at the figure. Not because I'm beautiful or anything - although, I am becoming someone enough to be stared at for a certain amount of time - but because I'm finding something new and interesting to stare at each and every day. Whether it's the way my skin is looking now - no more oily-look for me! - or it's how skinny my fingers have gotten, I find myself fascinated for hours and hours, just staring. It makes me sound like a crazy conceited person obsessing about their looks daily, at every chance they got, I know, but, trust me, if one were as fat as I was, and they suddenly found the time in their life to step away from the junk food to lose weight, then they would know just exactly what I'm talking about. And the more I went to the gym, the more difference I saw in myself, the better I felt about myself. I had never felt as happy as I was now in my life. I was always happy, sure, but I wasn't exactly ecstatic about life. Now I was. I had more than just life to look forward to now. Everything I looked at was like a story to me, everyone I met weren't just people anymore - they were individuals with many different uniqueness to each and every character, each with a different color aura and personality about them. I wasn't as guarded about myself anymore. I actually talked to people now, instead of being the wallflower, like I usually was. And, hell, if I was really having a good day, sometimes I would initiate conversation with anyone. The anxiety that usually ailed me wasn't a problem with me as much anymore.
I mean, I'm not just helping myself to be a little more outgoing, Pein's also helping. Well, not so much as help, but push me to talk to people that I was scared of. Like, say, the gangsters that hang by the dumpsters - I don't know why they would hang there; maybe because it looks like a good place to murder someone or something, the dumpster smell would be a good place to cover up the smell of rotting corpses they've rid of is my guess - he helped me get through the initial fear of having to speak with them for a full minute, I figured that they were normal people just like I was. Just with different ideas and morals and with a VERY different way of dressing themselves - they were actually pretty cool guys. They just had really strong in-your-face kind of attitudes. But, hey, I didn't want to judge people anymore by the way they dressed or by the way they warded off people with their attitudes anymore - I wanted to dig deeper than to just scrape at the surface of it all. And, so far, I'm doing a pretty good job of it all. People have accepted me into their groups like one of their own - as well as Pein, of course; if anything, we come as a package deal.
Speaking of Pein, we've actually been hanging out a lot. Not with just other people or during lunch or just walking each other to class or anything, but out of school, too. And alone with one another as well. Not that it means anything or that I would like anything to happen! It is a nice thought, though, wondering about such things. But still! I don't even know if he rolls that way. The whole school knows that I'm, well, you know, driving on the other side of the road. And, every time, whether I'm talking to someone new or not, they always ask me the same question. Each and every one of them! They ask me if Pein and I are going out. All of them! Sure, they don't ask him, mostly because he's got the same strong personality as those gangsters, so they're kind of scared as to exactly WHAT he'll even think of saying or doing to them. Maybe the reason they ask is because he's the only guy I really hang out with most out of all the other boys I've met. The people I were friends with last year asked me the same question when I hung out with Shikamaru! Of course, I said no to their question, and, even so, they still continued to ask me unnecessary questions about him, and whether or not I knew what his preference was, but, in all reality...
I don't even know WHAT his sexual preference is! We talk a lot and stuff, a lot about stupid stuff, and other kinds of crap, but I don't even think he ever intends to go deeper than talking about intimate stuff or sexual preference or anything. He looks too much like the type of person who would avoid talking about that, and talking about feelings and sunshine and rainbows and shiny, happy, glittery stuff. I wouldn't talk about that, either, but I was gay - sometimes we were expected to talk about that shit. The thing is, though, I don't think he even knows I'm gay. I mean, at some point, I think he's heard some things, but I think he just brushes it off as rumors or meaningless gossip, or something because, if he knows and believes it, then he shows a pretty stable way of not showing he cares or that it doesn't bother him or anything. Maybe because I'm too much of a man for him to believe I'm gay...
...Yeah, I wouldn't believe myself to be a man either. Especially with the way I acted on the first day we met? That was a huge clue. Anybody watching from mo than a mile away would have pegged me as a fairy. Immediately. Hmm. Strange. Why hadn't he pointed any of my behavior out? I don't want him to, but anyone who noticed the oddest bit of behavior would've have been polite enough to ask the question, right? Unless he really didn't know. Or cared... Still strange, though.
Suddenly, there's a loud, rumbling, growling sound from outside my window, and I'm sucked out from my thoughts too quick. I turn to my window, pull the curtains open, and look down into the street.
Speak of the devil.
It's Pein. On a motorcycle? At my house? And on a Saturday? Confusion arises in me. What's he doing here?
I race down the stairs in a flash. My parents ask me what was the source of the cause. I don't respond as I yank the door open to find Pein with his fist raised to knock. He stunts his movement and grins, rubbing the back of his head sheepishly.
"Hey." He greets me, shyly. Almost as though he's afraid. I laugh at this. He jabs his thumb behind him, pointing at his motorcycle. "I hope I didn't cause too much disturbance of the force around here."
I shake my head, laughing.
"Nah, just broke a few windows, is all." I joke. He chuckles and swings his arms somewhat childishly, waiting. I stand there, waiting as well. I raise my eyebrow at him. He does the same. I laugh once more. "Did you want something?"
He raises both his eyebrows at me, suddenly incredulous.
"You serious? You're not inviting me in?"
"Do you really need an invite? You're not a vampire. You're welcome here all day, every day." I swing the door open all the way and signal his entrance. He rolls his eyes and steps in, muttering under his breath about vampires and night and something else I didn't catch.
I shut the door as he stands before my family, still swinging his arms kind of awkwardly, now just standing there, watching them. He waves just as awkward as he acts, smiling shyly. Huh, different attitude when around 'parental units,' as he would say. Goes mute, instead of all out with his claws out. Interesting. My family waves back at him, but they're less awkward about it. I push Pein gently, just to get him a little closer towards the closest human contact that I can get him to, which is my pregnant mother and father who are cuddling on the couch, and he sort of shies away, resisting quietly. I laugh.
"Pein, this is my mom, Mikoto Uchiha, and this is my dad, Fugaku Uchiha. Mom, Dad, this is Pein, one of my friends from school. The first friend I ever made." I say, all with a smile on my face as he awkwardly shakes their hands. Is he shaking? Scratch that! Is he sweating? Oh, man, this is pure gold! All right, don't laugh, Sasuke; it's not nice to laugh at other people. You used to be as awkward as that. Around EVERYONE. Agh, my troll brain - always finds a way to stunt my amusement.
Seriously, though... Why is Pein so nervous? Is he honestly scared of meeting parents? I mean, I remember acting like that when I first met Ino and Shikamaru's parents, but I got over it in the first couple of minutes. Maybe because he didn't expect them to be here - their car's in the garage, so the house looks pretty dead from the outside. Although, not from the inside, I'm noticing. The television set is on and the sound is pretty high. They got it on some foreign soap opera. Spanish, I assume. That's weird. What were my parents doing in order to leave it there? Okay, Sasuke, don't go there. Dangerous place, your mind is, friend.
"Hey, how are ya, buddy-boy?" My dad says, and it's strange to hear him say those words. Maybe because he's never used those words before on my friends, only on me. "Is that your bike out there?" Pein nods quickly. "How old is it?"
"Uh, I actually just got it yesterday. I actually just came over to show it to Sasuke. Thought he'd be interested in it... Sir." Aw, he was afraid! He was referring to my father as 'sir'! He didn't have to do that. Dad was always nice - he never blew a fuse or anything.
"Really? That's good. That's REALLY good." Dad suddenly gets up and opens the window curtains wider to get a better look at it. He chuckles in approval, and looks over at him. "Had me one of those when I was your age. I would go everywhere with it. Never quietly, but, man, it was fun. Took my lady out here on endless rides. Of course, though, it wasn't all fun and games..."
"Oh, yes, I wonder why, sweetheart. Got into an accident, didn't you?" My mother suddenly interjects, crossing her arms over her overgrown belly, eyebrows raised, obviously not at all fazed by the nostalgia my father was getting over the bike. Pein looked absolutely engrossed in the story that my father told, but it still didn't seem to wipe away the nervousness that pooled in his forehead. I leaned against the doorframe, watching this event with my arms crossed over my chest, amused.
Dad chuckled nervously.
"Right, well... Yeah. I got into an accident. Some idiots got me all riled up and challenged me to a race. Me, not being able to resist turning down the race - and free money - I took a chance. And I raced."
"Broke his arm and leg in doing that, though. Didn't you, hon?"
"W-Well, yeah, but I got the money, didn't I?"
"You did. But now, tell the boy - what did you spend it on?"
"...A new bike to replace my wrecked one."
"Uh-huh. And what were you supposed to spend it on?"
My dad was almost ashamed to answer this. And Pein? Pein looked like he didn't know what to do in this situation. He didn't know whether my dad was telling the story anymore, or just digging himself a deeper hole of trouble by my mom. He looked at me for help. I shrugged, chuckling quietly at his expressions, as though telling him to wait it out. He turns back to my parents who seem to be reliving in the past of the argument.
"But, babe, it was a lot of money! I wasn't about to spend it all on an engagement ring! That's what I gave you my grandmother's engagement ring for!"
"Oh, yeah, because buying a new bike is so much more important than getting an engagement ring for your fiancée when you know that your grandmother's ring didn't fit her!"
"Well, it's not my fault you've got chubby fingers! Blame your oldest son for that!" Ooh, now that wasn't a good thing to say. I know my father didn't mean that, but it was too late to take it back now. The fun of it all was over. Now I knew the time to leave. Right now.
"Okay, so the moral of the story is, 'Don't go racing, get into an accident, and spend all your prized winnings on replacing a wrecked bike when you know perfectly well that your fiancée is in need of a better fitting ring!'" Before anything else happens, I grab Pein's arm and race the hell out of there, before the real arguing starts. And, sure enough, it does start, just as soon as we close the door.
Now, to be honest, I'm not worried that they're arguing, because I know they'll be okay, and that their marriage will be fine and such. They have been arguing a lot, but it's because of my mother's raging hormones, that's all. Nothing more, nothing less. So, it's nothing to worry about. Except for, you know, the fact that my dad will be sleeping on the couch tonight.
Both Pein and I stare at each other as the arguing continues inside. I release his arm and let out a relieved whoosh of air. He does, too, then starts laughing. I do as well. Why do we laugh? Well, what else is there TO do? That's the only thing to do after something like that happens before your eyes. Especially when in front of a friend they haven't met.
For just about a minute, we laugh. Just that. We don't even hear the arguing anymore, but I'm sure it's still going on somewhere else around the house. Even so, I believe we're over it. Not entirely, but it's a step. In that instant, Pein seems to be doing all right as well. He lets out a few couple of quiet chuckles, and then he sighs in a somewhat relieving way. I watch him as he looks over at my house, then back at me, then back at the house. I smile slightly. He seems to be panicking inside at the sudden turn of events that he believed to have caused.
"Are they going to be all right? Do they usually fight like that when visit comes around?" I don't know what it was about his sudden panicky attitude, but it kind of looked cute on him. The way his silver eyes seemed to dart back and forth between me and the door behind the arguing. Maybe it's just because of the look on his face and the way he's acting, but, either way, it's interesting to watch him.
...I don't like him!
"They're fine. Mom's emotions are just a little more heightened these days. Even worse now that Dad brought up the motorcycle incident..." To this, he hangs his head in shame.
"I'm sorry about that. I didn't think my motorcycle would reopen old wounds and arguments. I honestly just came to show you my baby." He says, signaling towards his motorcycle. I laugh, shaking my head at him, crossing my arms over my chest, thoroughly impressed by the enormous bike he rode to my house in.
I approach the bike, and survey it entirely, deeming it respectable for my taste, despite that I knew nothing of bikes. Though, it was a gorgeous bike, indeed. Looked dangerous and all, but it was still a nice bike.
"I like it. It's your style. How much was it?" I touch the leather seat, feeling the leathery smoothness of the seat. He does the same, smiling. It's apparent that he's in love with this contraption of metal danger too much already. He rubs the bike, sighing contentedly.
"Just a month's worth of my allowance..." He answers, somewhat dreamily. I roll my eyes. Of course a boy like Pein would spend that much money on a bike. Any boy, actually. Except me, though. I very much preferred something small and second-handed, compared to the monstrosity of a vehicle he was hogging around. He looks at me, eyes shining brightly, suddenly excited. "You want to take a ride on it? I want you to be the first person of my friends to experience the vibration on this baby."
"Yeah, I think the whole neighborhood felt it firsthand." I joke, but he only smiles. He pats at the seat gently. He really wants me to be the first one of his friends to experience the dangerous situation of it all that was on joining him on a ride? Was he serious? But... What about... Didn't he have anyone other than me, more important than I was? Come on, he had to have let someone ride it before asking me to do so, right? Right? "Why me? What about a girlfriend? Your brother? Sister? Cousin? Uncle? Aunt? Parents? Anyone else rather than me? Someone you've known longer, maybe? You can't trust me not to crash it. I'll end up blowing it to smithereens, Pein. You honestly cannot let me - a clumsy stranger-type person, who you've only known for a week, nonetheless - ride with you."
"Nah, I don't believe you. I want you to take a ride on it, all right? I don't care if I've known you for a week. I feel as though I've known you longer than anyone else, you know?" Really? Did he really say that? That was impossible. But, I mean, we have been talking a lot more, and we have been hanging out a lot out of school lately, as well. And we've been texting a lot. So, I guess I kind of understood why he'd let me be the first to ride. Still, though, he wasn't supposed to be granting immediate permission for me to ride his motorcycle. I wasn't even sure if I wanted to ride it. Better yet, I hardly would seem to think that my parents would be right in their minds to let me. "All right, how about an exchange? In order that you don't feel guilty, you take me out to eat, you pay, and everything, and I'll let you ride it all day today. And any other day you feel like using it. Shit, I'll teach you how to drive it if you don't know how to. It's easy. All you gotta do is focus on the balance."
Ooh, no, I wasn't good at that whole balance thing. And did he just ask me out? Or was that all in my head? Nah, it was probably just a friendly invite. Not that it matters much. He's just a friend. I'm just a friend. I don't see him like that. He doesn't see me like that. Despite how nice he's being about letting me ride his hog. He was just nice was all.
Despite my protests, however, he pushes me onto the bike, and teaches me the way of the bike, on the way the pedal works, and the clutches and all that crap. Even so, I've forgotten it all. But he drills it into my head consistently, making sure that I understand perfectly on how to handle this monstrosity, so that it sticks and that I won't forget, despite how much I may want to. He makes very sure of that.
And then comes the time for me to turn it on and actually ride off into the road. Which I'm very much doubting to do so, but Pein keeps me on the bike, disregarding the dislike on my part that's growing for his stupid bike.
"Come on, Sasuke, nothing's going to happen. You'll be fine. Besides, I'm going to be sitting right behind you, so, in the case that you fuck things up -" I scowl at him. "I WILL take over. I won't risk our death."
"But you're already taunting Death by placing me in charge of the wheel!" I snap, irritated at just how calmly he was going to allow me to lead us to our fast and untimely death if he were to let me stay behind the wheel like this. He sighs. Not impatiently. But as though he were ready to prove a point. I wasn't going to listen. I start to get off the bike. However, he places his hand over mine, stunting the movement. My eyes immediately move towards the intimate human contact he's holding over me. I look back up at him, suddenly doubting what exactly his intentions and motivations are for riding his bike.
Then he's looking at me with those silver eyes, and I find myself lost in the spell of it all, which seems barbaric, since I promised myself not to do such a thing. Ever again. But I guess some things never change.
"Sasuke, this is a once in a lifetime experience. Either you take it, or lose it forever. I'm offering you gold here. Take a chance and risk everything, no matter how crazy it sounds." I want to speak against him and his words, but I'm frozen by the way he's looking at me. Much too seriously. He's probably going to end up having to force me to ride the bike. I wouldn't doubt that he wouldn't go along with doing that - he looks strong enough to carry me and force me to stay on the bike. Then I remember I'm much lighter than I used to be. Man, now I was really trying to get out from the way he was looking at me. I squirmed, but he kept a firm hand on my own. He towered over me, blocking any sign of escape. Darn. "Listen, I know that you're afraid to take risks. I've noticed. Since the first day that I asked you to skip, I knew. But, come on, there's a reason our paths crossed, right? Someone like me hanging out with you has to account for something."
I agreed to that. Slightly.
"Well, yeah, but what about my parents? I don't think they'd appreciate the idea of me riding on a motorcycle, you know?"
"So? You're already eighteen. You're basically a man already. You're entitled to do what you want now. Although, despite what I'm telling you, I don't advise you to disobey your parents. It's wrong, and it's immoral of me to even suggest the mere thought of it, but I've had different parents than you do. And, look, we're teenagers, we're entitled to making stupid mistakes. We were born to rebel against the hierarchy. You have to agree with me on that, right?" To be honest, as insulting as it was to my parents' power over me, I did agree with him. I didn't want to, but I did anyway. In fact, he made a whole lot of sense. Now, I didn't know what it was that made me agree. Maybe because, deep inside, I knew that I had to have some sort of power of my own actions, instead of being held up by my mom and dad's word. Or maybe it was the adrenaline rush that suddenly rises within me. Whether it's by his touch, or it's by the bike, I don't know. I now know what it is that I want to do, what I desire most out of all of this.
"Fine. I want to ride the bike." I tell him. He grins, then releases my hand to sit behind me. He's about ready to go. I don't know if I am, though. I have no idea where in the hell we're going, anyway. I turn my head to look at him. It's strange, having to turn my head and have his own face so close to my own. He doesn't seem to mind it, though. "So, um, where are we going again?"
"You're buying me lunch, remember? In exchange for learning how to ride the bike." He replies, and I nod, confirming. Yet I'm still not ready. He is. He grabs the clutch, and the engine roars to life, then, he wraps an arm around my waist - it feels strange to have him press so closely to me, and I'm sure he feels it, too; neither one of us are complaining, though - although, he keeps one hand on one clutch, right beside my hand.
And, just like that, he lets me take the wheel.
"We could have almost died! My gosh! I can't believe you let me do that!" I squeak as we step in through the doors of McDonald's. I'm shaking from the adrenaline rush, from the scare, from the cold air that hits me.
Pein merely chuckles.
"You did fine, Sasuke. So that car almost crushed us. Big deal. We're still alive, aren't we?" He jokes.
I smack his arm lightly.
"It's only because you took charge of the clutch that we didn't get crushed! It was a good thing you did... I'm never doing that ever again, though. Promise me you won't ever let me do that again, Pein, please. I still want to live..." I say and settle myself into a booth, mostly to calm my nerves. I'm still shaking from the scare. And the cold, of course. Geez, why is it so friggin' cold in here, anyway? I'm freezing my toes off here!
"Fine. I won't make you ride again. I promise." He holds up his right hand, as though swearing on it. He notices me shivering. "Are you cold or something?"
"Just a little. But I'm sure it's just because I scared the crap out of myself out there." I say, brushing off his concern.
"I highly doubt that, Princess. It is pretty cold. So, here." He proceeds to take off his red hoodie, and I clamor against the action. I argue that I'm not all that cold, when I know I really am. We both know. He insists, handing it to me, waiting for me to take it. I don't want to, despite my shivering.
Why? Well, you know why! Okay, maybe some of you do, and some of you don't, but, either way, I'll tell you. It just feels like we're on a date or something, but I keep trying to tell myself that this is not what it is. But I keep having doubts because, so far, he's touched me many more times than I can count. Not inappropriately or anything. Just, like, you know, touching my hand, wrapping his arm around my waist when we were on the bike - granted, I know he's supposed to do that, or he'll fall off the bike - and lending me his sweater, even if he's cold too. It could be all in my head or something, but it seems to me like he didn't just want to show me his bike and have me ride it firsthand. I believe there's something else behind it all. Like he planned this, or something. But I try to tell myself that he's just trying to be a good friend. Visiting me unannounced, letting me have a look and ride on his bike before anyone else, and hanging out at McDonald's was anything a good friend would do, right? Friends hung out at McDonald's. Alone. I'm sure, right? I wouldn't know entirely, since I've never been alone with just ONE friend, so excuse me if it sounds just a bit strange for me to be obsessing over this like a lunatic. It's a big deal for me, of course, mostly because this guy is just making me question all his motives, wondering whether or not he's straight. I'm being stupid, I know, but I'm totally paranoid about boys. I don't care if they're straight or not - I'm just utterly terrified of being alone with them. Just me, by myself, with no one to help me handle a situation like this.
Okay, no, whatever, Sasuke, just take the hoodie, and appreciate the gesture he's making out to you. No over analyzing anything today. Take it, take it, take it! Before he thinks you're retarded!
I take it, and, almost immediately, his scent overpowers my senses. I find myself inhaling. Deeply. For such a rebellious-acting, manlier-than-men kind of guy that Pein was, I never would have expected him to smell so good. Oh, God, no, Sasuke; don't do that! Man, I was such a freak... Slowly, I put on the hoodie and zip it up to my chin, avoiding his gaze - I really hope he didn't notice the freaky thing I did - and I suddenly felt warmer. I sigh contentedly. He raises an eyebrow at me.
"Better?" He asks. I nod. "Good. Now... Our deal? You're paying." He holds out his hand, waiting. I roll my eyes and stuff my hand in my pocket, taking out a twenty I didn't know I had in there. He takes it and is about to turn on his heel to go buy his meal, but he turns back to me. "Are you hungry? I'll buy. After all, it is YOUR treat, Sasuke."
I laugh and shake my head.
"All yours. Go crazy."
He pumps his fist lightly in victory, as though expecting my response, and turns away from me to go to the counter and order. I laugh quietly at his strange little attitude. Now, all right, I'm not going to lie, Pein is a nice guy. And he's cute. And he's a person that could entertain me for hours with his jokes and his personality. Maybe I'm looking too much into what he's doing and what he's saying, or just what he might be insinuating between everything he's saying, but I suppose I like him. Not like a crush yet, but kind of like a possibility. I know it's probably just my head playing tricks on me, but it's nice to dream about a possibility like him and I going out, right? Only in my daydreams, though, because experiencing the real thing would probably freak him out more than it would me. I mean, it's just -
"I'm sorry, did I hear right? Sasuke?" A voice calls out to me. A familiar voice. I know the voice, but I just can't place on just who exactly it belongs to. I turn to the source in which it came from. And I'm shocked.
It's Temari. But she's not alone. That mop of untidy blond hair is recognizable even after two months of trying not to think about the person to who it belongs to. However, the beard that he's sporting could almost make him unrecognizable. Still, his eyes are what I remember most of all. Other than that, he's changed a lot.
Everything that I had suppressed in my chest for the summer, every emotion, every fiber of my being, wants to unhinge from within me. I feel guilty. The old Sasuke comes rushing back, ready to surface at the sight of Naruto. I feel like running away. I didn't want to face him. I don't think I was ready. I don't think he was ready. He's angry with me. I'm pretty sure he is. I can almost feel it. Those cerulean eyes are not straying from my own. Even as much weight as I've lost, I believe he'd still recognize me. He does recognize me, though. The shock in his face shows it all. I'm afraid. What do I say? What can I say?
"Oh, I... Sorry. I thought you were someone else. You just... You look a lot like one of my old friends." Temari starts to say, and she's about to leave, but I get up from the booth too quickly. It's almost as though I'm going to attack her. But I'm not. I wouldn't.
"No, Temari, it's Sasuke. You weren't wrong." Naruto says, before I can. And his gaze toward me doesn't falter. He's judging me.
No, Sasuke! You aren't going to think like that anymore! You've changed, remember? I'm sure Naruto's changed too. He would never judge.
"Yeah, hi, Temari. Hi... Naruto." I smile weakly at him. Like that'll help. I don't think it does. He turns away too quickly to notice my smile.
"It's really you? No way... You lost weight! Wow!" Temari gushes as she rushes over to hug me. She starts to poke and prod at my face, at my arms, at my stomach, as if trying to make sure it's all real and she's not dreaming. "It's been a while. So, of course, you'd do something different to yourself! Oh, wow... How are you? How's school? What are you doing here?"
Questions. So many. And even more distracting it was to try to answer them when Naruto was standing behind Temari, standing awkwardly, waiting. I really wanted to let them be alone together. I was ruining what I supposed was their alone time. This just only made me feel worse. But I brush it off. Just for now. I turn back to Temari.
"Um, I'm good. School's going well. Better than ever, actually, but, um, it's nothing much of a major change." It was, but I wasn't going to tell her that with Naruto here. "And, well, I'm just here... Getting some food. With a friend." I wasn't about to clarify what kind of friend Pein was or anything.
"Ohhh, is it, like, a date or something?" She giggles.
Now, I don't know if she's doing this on purpose or anything, but, either way, from the way this conversation is taking a turn, I don't think Naruto really cares. Hmm. Well, fine. I don't either... Or, at least, I try not to.
"No. He's just a friend."
"Don't have time for boys, now that you're thin, or what, Sasuke?"
Stop asking those questions, please. Please, please, please.
"Still getting used to the new me, so, no. Um, do you want to sit?" Bad idea to invite them to sit with me, but I believe it was the only way to stray Temari away from those kind of questions. She sits. Naruto joins her. Somewhat sullenly. I know, Naruto, I know you don't want to be anywhere near me, but you don't have much of a choice right now. I scoot all the way into the booth, near the window, and away from Naruto. I look at Temari, trying to focus all my attention on her, but also trying not to keep them out of the loop as well. It was hard, considering he used to be my boyfriend and I shattered his heart into irreparable pieces. I pushed the very thought away from my mind. "So, um, how are you guys? What's been going on your lives? Anything new to report?"
Temari's face shone at the question. She giggled and shook Naruto's arm excitedly. He snickered at her behavior, so that loosened up his attitude quite well, which eased the tension that surrounded the table. Thank goodness, I thought I would be the one in charge of doing so.
"Well, you won't believe me, but... I'm pregnant!" She squeals, and, for that moment, I don't really believe her. She doesn't even look pregnant. She notices my confusion, though. "Oh, I'm only a couple of months pregnant, so it's okay that you don't believe it. I won't be showing for quite a while. Although, coming to McDonald's might be a big clue... But I do that everyday, so it's not much of a change!" She laughs.
All three of us do. And, for that moment - ONLY in that moment - do I feel like nothing's wrong with me, or with the world. At least, you know, just not with as many problems as I had additionally caused myself to mess with the world and its most gifted people. But I push the thought from my mind, reminding myself that I wasn't going to be that guy anymore. I wasn't going to be depressing, nor was I going to focus on the bad. I had to focus on the now and remain in the now. I had to stay happy, be happy like I promised myself and everyone else. A small hint of a smile still remained on my lips as the awkward atmosphere slowly returned. As well as Pein with his tray full of food. I could only suspect that he would spend most of my money - I didn't mind; after all, I did promise him food - and choose off the dollar menu.
He was busy looking his lips and salivating over the cheap deliciousness of a meal that would soon enter his mouth, so it was expected that he would be surprised by the additional people at the table. Not that he wasn't used to it - we were constantly surrounded by people we didn't know, in regard to the trio of girls always bringing unknowns - but, this time, he didn't know how to react to this, since it was out of school, and since he thought it was only going to be the two of us. Still, he could adapt.
Slowly, he slipped in beside me, casting wary glances toward Temari and Naruto. He smiled politely their way, waved somewhat awkwardly as a greeting, then looked down at his food, pointed at it as a silent offering as though to compensate for any other awkwardness he would bring. Temari giggled, shaking her head. Naruto merely shook his head.
"Hi, I'm Temari. This is Naruto. It's nice to meet you." They each shook hands, an entanglement of limbs amongst the table disrupted the force field of awkwardness around the table, which soon turned into bouts of laughter at the odd situation of their shaking of hands.
"I'm Pein. Nice to meet you, too." Pein says, chuckling. He takes a fry, and is about to eat it, but he stops. He looks down at his food, then looks over at me. "You want anything? There's a crapload of food here to fill up the whole restaurant, I'm sure. Take your pick. Seriously."
I shake my head, shaking my hands at the food, as though a pitiful way to repel it.
"No thanks. Don't want to awake the beast within." I reply, patting my stomach, despite the way it seems to be growling dangerously at me. All three of them hear it, even if the ambiance around here in the restaurant is pretty loud.
Pein rolls his eyes, mutters a 'yeah, whatever' at me, and hands me a carton of French fries, chicken nuggets, stuffs a second straw into his drink - to which I raise my eyebrows at; he only shrugs - and pushes it all the way over to me. Then he scarfs down the food he has on his tray without a second thought, not even noticing the way Temari is looking at him, then at me, or at the way I stare at him. That was very nice of him. Too nice of him. Which only rises her suspicion of whether or not I'm on a date with Pein. Which I clearly am not! I have to mind myself to keep sane...
She raises her eyebrows at me, smirking, that assumption burning holes from her eyes in through mine. I shake my head rapidly, and busy myself with my newly acquired food. But I feel as though that would be like accepting such an absurd assumption. I almost refrain from eating it, but I'm hungry. All the while avoiding her smug stare.
"All right, well, I'm going to get some food. Just watching him eat like that makes me feel like I haven't eaten since forever." Temari says and Naruto get up, so she can stand up from the booth. "I'll be right back. Naruto, do you want anything?" He shakes his head, and is about to sit down, but then the realization of being alone with me and Pein sinks in. It's too late, though. He slinks back into the booth. And he just remains quiet. Although it's obvious he wants to say something. Anything. I want to say something, too, but it's hard to think of anything. Especially if I still sort of had feelings for him. Barely there, but still there. I hardly think he would feel the same about me, though. There's no use obsessing over it, if the only thing I want is to be friends. Except... It's hard. But I had to say something. I couldn't just wait for him to say anything first. I had to take action nowadays.
"So, uhm... How've you been?" I ask. A good, safe question. I wasn't going to divulge any deeper into asking questions probing about his personal life or regarding that of his breakdown - I might be curious to know whether or not it was because of me, but I believe that might seem just a tad conceited of me to think a thing like that; it could probably be something else entirely. Either way, I'm sure he wouldn't have liked to talk about that.
He shrugs slightly.
"I've been alright. Been recording a lot more nowadays. On account of Temari, of course. We're doing a day-to-day update on her belly. It sounds dumb, but it's... It's interesting to see how much she grows in those hell-ish months." He replies, now settling himself into the booth more comfortably. He meets my eyes now, and those familiar orbs of endless blue suck me in once more. I bite a nugget to keep myself busy from remaining in a trance because of them. They don't stray, however. "What about you?"
"Well, like I said earlier, school's going better than usual. There's... Well, not a lot has been happening, but I'm sure something's bound to come up. Oh! My mom's getting bigger. She's about ready to pop any day now." I'm getting more and more comfortable by the second that I'm talking to him. Like when we were dating. But we're not anymore. I just have to keep reminding myself, and I have to restrain myself from doing or saying anything dangerous or stupid around him or Pein. Especially that of my and Naruto's past, since I don't think he knows about my sexuality. Or of the fact that we were once a thing. Crap, better not blow anything. I'm capable of doing a thing, so I have to constantly remind myself. Over and over again.
"Really?" He seems genuinely interested. "Wow. Do you know if it's going to be a boy or a girl?"
"No, she wants to be surprised."
"But what about all the baby clothes she's gotten? I'm sure she's gotten some by now, right?"
"Yeah, but she's gotten all yellow clothes. So, whether the baby is a boy or a girl, the color fits perfectly."
He leans back on the booth, suddenly crossing his arms over his chest.
"Smart woman, your mom is. How is she doing, by the way? Is she... Well, is she still sane?" He chuckles. I chuckle.
Pein chuckles.
Oh, God, I had almost forgotten he was here. I felt terrible, all of sudden. Just ignoring him like that? What kind of person was I? It wasn't like he cared whether or not he was included in the conversation - he looked happy enough eating his food without any distractions whatsoever - but I still had to string him into the conversation, somehow. I had to make him feel like he had a part in this conversation, despite that Naruto and I were talking with each other as though we were the only people left here on this planet. It was just like...
Nope. Wasn't going there. Reminding, reminding, reminding. Whoo, almost dug my own grave with that one.
"Actually, Pein, here, got her all riled up right before we came here. Right, Pein?" I nudge him gently, and it's as though he's been woken from a trance. He drops his burger at the action, then looks at me, suddenly confused. Then he remembers and nods at Naruto.
"Yeah, well, I wasn't the only one who caused it. My bike had a part in it." He shakes his head at the remembrance, then laughs, jabbing his thumb at me while looking at Naruto. "His parents were practically clawing at each other, so, you know, I'm just standing there, looking like an idiot. I don't know what to do. Sasuke doesn't know what to do. Until he just grabs my arm and drags me out of there. I'm pretty sure they were still arguing when we'd left..."
Naruto lets out a quiet snort, shaking his head incredulously at the idea of my parents arguing. They never argued in front of him, so maybe that's why he seemed so surprised to hear such an occurrence. But I don't think that's what baffled him...
"You came here riding on a bike? Did you ride on the expressway?" He asks, concerned, which throws me off a little.
"Yeah. Shit was scary. Sasuke almost made us crash. But, you know, it's okay - I had my hands on the clutch, so we were safe." Pein remarks. That doesn't soothe Naruto in the least. Why was he acting all panicky? And why was Pein saying all calm-like? That really didn't make the story better... It was actually making me a little scared to hear the story being told like that. I shivered at the remembrance and tugged Pein's hoodie onto my shoulders even tighter, as I bit into another nugget.
"You let Sasuke drive? That's... That's kind of dangerous, don't you think? How do you even know if the motorcycle was a smart choice to be riding on?"
"Of course it was going to be a smart choice to ride on. I've been riding bikes since I was sixteen. And, yeah, I let Sasuke drive. He wanted to learn." Now, Naruto was looking at me like I was the strangest person on the planet. I don't know why. I hadn't done anything wrong. Why was he so concerned about me, anyway? It wasn't like I belonged to him. Not anymore, at least.
I busied myself with taking a sip of Pein's shared drink, as to avoid his stare.
"Sasuke, I've got to talk to you." He suddenly says, and gets up from the booth. I stare at him in confusion, but he's waiting like his life depended on it.
So I have to ask Pein to scoot out. And he does so, without any complaints. Not that he would, or anything. I don't know where Naruto plans on taking me to talk to me, but it's terrifying. He just looks so serious as he steps outside. He paces for a while, but then he gets a hold of himself and looks at me. Then he starts to pace again. And looks at me once more. He squints at me, sizing me up. He looks inside through the window. I'm guessing he's looking for Temari or something, maybe Pein, but I don't know. He's acting strange. He acts even more strange when he finally speaks... Like an insane man. I'd like to say it nicely, but there's no nice way of putting it as such.
"Are you stupid, Sasuke? He's letting you drive the bike? That's dangerous! Do you know how many people die on riding motorcycles? I assure you that it's many. Why would you go out and put yourself and another at risk by doing that?" He starts to pace again. He starts to breathe heavily. Oh, man, he was going to blow. I had to find some way to calm him or something.
But I don't know how to anymore. And I can't seem to shake the main question surging through my head. Why did he care? It wasn't like I meant anything to him anymore, right? I was the one who messed up the relationship, so he was supposed to hate my guts. Not be concerned for my life like I wasn't.
"Hey, Naruto, calm down. Nothing happened. We were fine. Pein had everything under control. Like he said, he's been riding since he was sixteen." I say softly, not in a condescending voice. I try to control my own emotions, in an attempt to calm him.
But I guess doing so doesn't really calm him.
"That doesn't really help much if you're already lying in the middle of the road, dead, Sasuke!" He growls, then he shakes himself, as though shaking the image from his head. "I can't even dare to imagine what I would do..." He rests against the wall, suddenly tired, cradling his head in his palms. He sighed. "I wouldn't be able to live with the guilt if such a thing were to happen to you."
Guilt? Why would he live with the guilt if he wasn't the one who forced me into riding the bike? Unless he put himself at fault for the way I seemed to be acting on impulse nowadays. Maybe he thought that he was the main reason I got skinny. He was, in a way, but I was mostly doing that for my health. That of the guilt, though... Why did it matter so much to him? He wasn't supposed to be worried about me.
I crouched down beside him, and rested against the wall as well, watching him as his eyes suddenly seem to drift faraway. Thinking.
"Naruto, you shouldn't feel guilty. You didn't do anything in order for me to go riding on that bike. That was all on my own accord. You shouldn't be worrying about me anymore. I'm fine..." I murmur. I know it doesn't help him in any way, my saying this, but it's true. He shouldn't worry.
"But I'm not. I'm not fine. I wasn't fine when you broke my heart, and I'm still not fine, knowing that you're off doing stupid, reckless stunts that could get you killed. And then... You hanging out with metal-face doesn't soothe my consciousness of you being okay." He looks at me, measuring my expression. A mirthless laugh escapes his lips as he sees my pained expression. "I know, I know. I should hate you for messing up the best relationship I've ever had in my life, but... I can't help it. I can't hate you. I miss you, Sasuke. So much. I still care about you. I still love you... So, you know, just... Pardon me for being concerned about your well being." I'm speechless. What can I say to all that? I can't say anything remotely equal as to what he said. And I couldn't say that I felt the same way about him, either - I broke up with him, I was the one who said I didn't feel the same way about him as he felt about me, I was the evil, heartless ex. Damn, I was in a tough situation. As I parted my lips to speak, Naruto did the same as well. But the words came out of his mouth before they did out of mine. "Did you know I had a breakdown sometime in the week after you broke up with me?" I want to say yes, that Sakura told me, but I didn't think that would be the best of ideas. I shook my head, suddenly unsure of what he was about to tell me. Because whatever it was, I'm sure it was nothing good. He nodded, turning from me to look at his hands, to which I now realized were covered with faint scars. Scratches? "Yeah, well, you were part of the reason that I did. Not entirely, but... I think you should know why that happened to me."
I don't know if I wanted to know. What kind of person would I be if I wanted to know why he had his little episode? I didn't think it was a very appealing idea to tell me.
"No, Naruto, don't tell me, please. I don't think it's a very good idea. I don't want to -"
"I want you to know. It may not be the best idea to tell you, since it'll change your opinion of me vastly, but... You did say I never told you anything about me. And now I am." He takes a deep breath, mentally and physically preparing himself for the worse that is about to come. His hands clench into fists. The scars on his hands disappear for the briefest of moments, but make their appearance once more, once he relaxes. I can't bring myself to relax for what is to come, for what he's about to tell me. "You know how Itachi and I are kind of, like, well... How we don't exactly see eye to eye?" He murmurs. I nod. And I know now what he's about to tell me. Was it bad? Did I deserve to be told after what I'd done to him? But he doesn't refrain himself from telling me. He takes another deep breath, calming his nerves. He's shaking, I notice. "Well, back then - about a year or so ago its been, I think - we were friends. Really good friends. We did all kinds of shit together. We hung out practically every other day. I mean, we'd be hanging out everyday if, you know, if it were high school. Anyway... He brought in a close friend of his into the picture. Kisame. He was a nice kid. Really young, about your age, maybe older, a freshman. He was a lot like you, in many ways." For a moment, he stays quiet, remembering the kid, I bet. Then I see tears in his eyes. What had happened with this kid? With him?
I rub his back. I don't think it's the smartest thing to do, but it was the only way I knew how to express sympathy for someone without words. Of course, I knew how to express sympathy with words, but I don't know what's happened yet, enough to express myself.
"You don't have to tell me if it doesn't make you comfortable talking about it." I say. He shakes his head.
"I have to tell you. That way you'll know, that way you'll understand why Itachi hates me, that you should be the one to hate me instead of me hating you, of why you're not the worst person in the world, compared to me." He tells me. Then he composes himself yet again, staying strong against the tears that ail him. "Kisame hung out with us every chance that he got. We invited him over with us to, well, you know, do stupid shit. We were even more reckless than we are now. It was all fun and games for those couple of months. Until, well, we got a little too messed up one night. We were all wasted. Kisame was even more wasted, compared to us. Then, in that night, he did something a little... Different from what we'd ever expect from him. To me, at least. It was stupid on my part, though, to continue with any of it..." There were those tears building up again. He had to shake himself back to reality to keep them from coming out. He presses his hands onto his eyes, as if to rid himself of the wretched memories that are to come. "He kissed me that night. And I let him. I couldn't stop myself from letting him kiss me. I didn't even know he was like that. I wasn't like that either. I hadn't thought of doing that with him once... Yet I continued to kiss him. We went even further than that. I didn't know what I was doing. I wasn't even sure whether or not I felt about him the way he did for me. So... I told him I didn't feel what he felt for me. Then I left. For the next couple of days, we didn't speak. Itachi hadn't heard much of him either. He called him. Constantly. He never answered his phone. I got scared. I started to call him. I went over to his house. I..." He started to shake violently, and the tears started to come again. He didn't have to say anything else if the rest was too much to tell.
"Don't continue, Naruto. It's hurting you."
"Yeah, well, it hurt Kisame more when he drugged himself into oblivion, Sasuke." He snaps, the emotion taking over him completely. He's clenching his fists again. He slams his hand onto the concrete wall. I hear a sickening crack, and I know that he's broken something. It doesn't seem like he cares, though. He looks at me with tear-filled eyes, and I can feel his heart breaking. I'm watching him practically fall apart. His hand cups my face. I can't push it away. Either way, his hand falls. He looks sad. "Itachi and I went to his funeral. Separately. He knew that I was the one that caused his death. Kisame had told him what he had done, what we had done, what I didn't feel for him. Itachi and I got into a fight at that funeral. He absolutely hated me for that - he still does; it wouldn't be natural if he wasn't since Kisame was more of a best friend to him than I ever was - and I don't blame him. It was a horrible thing to do. I deserved what I got..."
I would have liked to say something against what he thought he deserved, but... I believed he did deserve it. How could he do that to someone? Lead someone on, make love to them, then tell them it was all a complete misunderstanding? That he didn't feel as strongly as they had felt for him? What... What kind of person was he exactly? I just... But I understood him, somehow. If anything, I compared myself to him. In the most twisted of ways. I wondered about our whole relationship. Did I play him like he played that Kisame kid? Did I lead him on, even if it meant utter humiliation to himself? It was stupid to compare our relationship like that to the death of someone. It wasn't right. But I couldn't help but wonder if Naruto and I were one in the same. Maybe we were. Just now was not the time to think about that.
I didn't know what I would say to him, though. How could I go about this? How would I be able to comfort him? How could I even swallow this information even now?
"You hate me just as much as Itachi does, don't you?" Naruto whispers shakily. I stare at him. He stares back, broken and angry at himself. I'd never seen these two emotions mesh together as roughly as his did. They looked odd on him.
In fact, he looked rather hopeless. I'd never seen him like that before as I did now. I thought he would be all rough and tough and 'fuck you, world' at everyone and everything. But he was human. There was no way he wouldn't experience these emotions as anyone ever did in everyday life. I was stupid to think he wouldn't.
I take his hand. Not as a pitiful past lover, or as a sign of wanting something more to happen between us yet again. But as a friend. I wanted to be friends.
"No, I don't." I reply. And I'm entirely truthful. "The past is the past. It sounds harsh, I know, and, yes, I may not have ever dealt with coping with someone's suicide, but I believe it helps not to think about it anymore. Don't guilt yourself into believing it was your fault. Maybe it was, maybe it wasn't. Who knows? He never said anything about it being your fault. Maybe it was something else entirely. Maybe he had problems at home. Maybe he just couldn't bear to go on with life anymore just... Well, just because. There are many dead end reasons. But, please, Naruto, stop blaming yourself and forget about it. Don't forget about him - keep him in your heart and in your prayers forever - but forget about the whole incident entirely. Pretend it never happened. Don't blame yourself anymore. No matter how much you think it's all your fault. Just think that it probably never wasn't." My words might sound heartless and stupid and totally selfish right now, I know. Still, I thought it was the most natural thing to do, right?
People died everyday. And, yes, people killed themselves willingly everyday as well. Why would anyone dwell on one person forever and blame themselves for the outcome that had occurred? It wasn't right to affect a person like that. It could leave some serious emotional scars on that affected person. Who knew if that affected person would end up killing themselves as well because of the overwhelming guilt? It wasn't fair to them.
I watch Naruto as he takes these words and their meanings in, letting them sink in. For a moment, he thinks. It has some effect on him, but he doesn't seem thoroughly convinced. He seems calmer, though.
"You may be right... But it doesn't stop Itachi from blaming me." He says, and he suddenly looks serious. Most traces of his tears are gone. I wipe at them with my free hand. He smiles faintly against the touch. "You remind me of him sometimes. Your brother. Despite the fact that you both are related - I mean, in the same way you two handle emotionally charged situations... He talked to me the same way you talked to me right now whenever I came to him with a problem. Reasonable and logical." He lets out a chuckle. "I miss him. He was a cool guy."
I smile now. He was okay. Because I helped. And because he compared me to my brother. Normally, it would bother me because, at first, I thought he was just a dick. I don't know why, and I still don't know. But now I saw him as a brother, as someone that I aspired to be someday. I was on my way, but just a little bit differently.
"I'll let him know." I murmur, relishing in the comfort his hand gave me. Not tingly feelings or anything. I am not going down that road with Naruto again. Not for a while, at least. Sure, I had feelings for him. That was just it. Nothing more, nothing less. I look at him. "I can't guarantee he'll return the exact response, but it's worth a try, right?"
He nods, giving my hand a firm squeeze.
"Right." He sighs, then turns toward the window of where Pein and Temari sit. He turns back to look at me. "I suppose you better head back inside. I'm sure metal-face is wondering where you ran off to. And I bet he's trying to figure out a way out of Temari's questioning about you two."
I laugh.
"Yeah... I wouldn't doubt she'd be doing that. She is pretty nosy." For a moment, we both chuckle. Then I realize we're still holding hands, and I realize everything he had said earlier about missing me, caring about me, and loving me. I wondered how he was taking all this. He was handling it pretty well if it seriously was bothering him. "Would it bother you at all if we WERE dating?"
Stupid question, but I believed it was a necessity. I thought he deemed it as so, too.
But he shrugs.
"It shouldn't. But, yeah, it kind of does. Don't let me stop you from dating him, though! If you want to date him, be my guest. It's your life."
"Oh, no, I didn't mean anything by it! I just... I was just curious, you know?"
He smirks now, as if he already knew.
"You're always curious... Besides, I don't really think metal-faces suit you." Then he releases my hand and nods towards McDonald's. "Go. And tell Temari we have to leave. I have a feeling I need to go to the hospital for my hand." He massages his hand lightly and winces, but still chuckles at my concerned expression. "Just go. I'm fine. They'll probably just tell me it's a sprain or something. Wrap it up, then send me off home. Simple. I'll keep you updated, all right? Don't worry about me. Go, go, go."
Keep me updated. Hmm. He was going to text me. Well, at least, I hoped he would. It would be nice to start texting again. As friends, though. I really would like to start over fresh. We dived in too deep, too far, the first time. I believe our relationship needed a second chance. A new chapter.
I leave and head inside to the cold of the restaurant once more. I pull Pein's hoodie against my shoulders even tighter. I approach the table and am not at all surprised to find them deep in conversation about music or something. And they're laughing. That's a good sign. I smile. Pein notices me immediately before Temari does. He frowns suddenly.
"Where were you? I had to finish off your food before it got cold." He looks guilty as his eyes loom over to observe where my food WAS. Wrappers remained in place of my once-there food. I didn't even mind. He looks at me and chuckles sheepishly. "I couldn't help it. You took long..."
"Actually, charge me as guilty, too." Temari laughs, then points to her belly. "Baby made me do it." They both start laughing. I laugh, too. I've been doing that a lot lately. Laughing.
"You can't blame the baby for eating my food! It went into YOUR mouth and into YOUR belly!"
"Yeah, but I'm sure it's the baby's fault for eating most of my food instead of me digesting it, which is the reason why I'm so hungry all the time now!" She giggles.
I roll my eyes, yet still laugh. Then I remember Naruto outside. I try to stray from the fact that he sort of broke his hand.
"Oh, Naruto wants to leave. He, uhm, well, he... He just wants to go."
"Agh, I'm not even done with my food." She whines, then flips her hand at the thought of that. "Bah, I'll make him stop by somewhere." She gets up from the booth. Pein does so, too. They hug each other. She kisses him on the cheek. "It was really nice meeting you, Pein. I hope I get to hear you play one of your songs someday."
Pein nods.
"Someday, yeah. When I'm a rockstar, babe, you'll be one of the first ones on my list for VIP tickets." He replies.
Temari grins.
"Awesome sauce." She kisses him on the cheek once more, then turns to me, hugs me really tightly, and kisses me both on the forehead and cheek. I blush slightly. "You look really good, Sasuke. Keep it up. Because I hope the next time I see you, you'll be sporting abs. And I want you flashing them to me every ten seconds as if you believe yourself to be Mike The Situation, all right?"
"All right. I'll try." I snort. She nods in confirmation to this, bids us both farewell once more, then leaves.
And Pein and I are alone again. It's not awkward anymore as I expected it to be. I slip in the booth, and he does the same. Surprisingly enough, he still has food on his tray. Did he order more, I wonder? Geez, the guy was a never ending pit. I watch as he eats. He offers, but I'm not hungry. Still. He shrugs and attacks his food once more. For mere minutes, I watch him eat. He mumbles some sentences to me about my friends and such and how nice Temari is and how much it sucks he didn't get to know much of Naruto and everything, all while spewing crumbs at me. But then... He gets quiet. Not entirely, but it seems as though it isn't the food that is making him quiet.
"And, uhm, I'm okay with you being gay, by the way." He suddenly says. He grins as I stare at him incredulously. Did Temari tell him about Naruto and I? Or was he looking out the window at us? Damn, I should've known he would have been watching. I have to be more careful about my ways around him. Whatever way he found out about me being gay - whether it be by Temari, or staring out the window as Naruto and I had our moment, or it was because of school - it didn't seem like he would tell me. He raises his hands up as I blush. "No judgement here, man! I love gay people! They're the foundation of our entertainment, you know?" I can't help but bark out a laugh at that. I never would have expected for the gay community to be his source of entertainment. I didn't even think I, myself, was entertaining. I suppose I was proved wrong. He dips his French fry into ketchup and bites it. "I practically live in the gay community, you know? My most closest friends are gay, my sister's gay, and I have had some pretty gay moments with my friends, so I think I'm more than okay with people being gay." He laughs as I roll my eyes at him.
And, to be honest, I felt more comfortable around him now. I felt my life was going in the right direction now. I was developing a renewed friendship with Naruto, I was getting thinner, I was gaining more and more friends each day, and I had the most understanding friend a person could have. Whatever else God had planned for me in the later future, I challenged him to knock me off my feet, if he could. Because whatever he had planned, I was sure, would not be able to mess my good streak.
A/N: So, yeah... now you know about Itachi and Naruto and Kisame. :o I really didn't want to make it too serious, but it's the way it came out. Sorry if it didn't appeal to your taste! D:
Review, please (if you'd like)!
- With much, much adored love, KK247 -