AN: Look who updated semiregularly for once. I'm really sorry how long it's been. Thanks for the reviews, leave some more. There's some drama in this one enjoy.. Sorry it's so fucking long I wasn't paying attention haha ANYONE WANT TO BE MY SMUT BETA? Or teach me how I can't write it for shit...

Four years is a long time to go without touching, kissing, or one on one time and Carlos and I were making up for lost time. He sucked on my neck leaving more hickeys on top of the older ones. I bit my lip in frustration as his mouth latched onto this spot where my neck and shoulder met, he still knew what I liked. I circled one of his pecks with my thumb and brushed my fingers down the trail of hair on his stomach. He pressed his body on top of mine, he undid my bra with eavesdropping on the floor. My hand found the bulge in his boxers and I ran my fingertips over the tight fabric, causing him to whine.

"Riley s-stop."

I let out a breathy chuckled and continued teasing me. "Nope."

His rough fingertips pulled at the hem of my underwear and he mimicked my actions, making my breath hitch.

"Quit."

He smirked and looped one finger around the elastic and tugged. I felt myself blush and my stomach flip.

"Car-" My complaint was cut off by the chime of my phone. Someone wanted to video chat with me. I glanced over and saw James' picture. "Fuck, Carlos."

He looked up from my neck where his face was hidden. "Mmm?"

"It's James he wants to FaceTime."

He shrugged and started kissing down my stomach. "Ignore 'em.

I sat up and tugged my shirt on, smoothed my hair down the best I could. I accepted the chat and was greeted by James.

"H-Hey." I said shakily as Carlos froze, his hands were on my hips.

"Hey Riley. You looked flushed, did you just get back from the gym."

I decided accepting his lie would be easier. "Yeah, how's the shoot going."

James was looking over his shoulder and shaking his head and smiling. He turned back to me. "Fine, I'll be home soon."

"Good I miss y-you." I bit my lip as Carlos nipped at my hipbone.

"You okay?"

"Yeah, just a stomachache."

He frowned. "You're not eating are you?"

I shrugged, to be honest, I hadn't really been hungry the past few days. "A little Kelly's been making sure I do."

"So have you been seen Carlos?" He spat his name with hatred.

I froze and Carlos tensed. "No I saw him the other when I was getting coffee but we didn't talk."

"Good."

I rolled my eyes and watched as the angry melted off his face and he winked. He was smiling at someone out of frame again. "Thanks, hey babe I gotta go."

I nodded, curling my fingers as Carlos kissed back up torso and chest. "Okay love you."

He was laughing at someone in the background. "Bye."

He hung up and Carlos pressed his mouth to mine. "You're so hot."

"We could've been caught. He would've killed you." I said trying to ignore the vibe I had gotten from James.

"As if." He snorted as he kissed me again. "You're not in the mood anymore are you?"

I shrugged. Carlos and I hadn't gone further than hand jobs and touching but I was starting to loose my strength when it came to him. "N-not really."

Carlos pulled me onto his lap. "What's wrong baby?"

"I'm cheating on him. H-He's been trying to get me to do what I do with you for years and I said no. But it's been a few months and were already gone further." I sniffled. "E-everytime I leave the house to see you he looks so sad. He doesn't even a-ask anymore."

"Look, maybe James isn't enough anymore." He whispered. "It could've been anyone I just happened to come back around. Do you want a few more days to think about what you want?"

I nodded hugged him. "T-thank you."

"No problem. I'm going go to okay?"

I kissed him and smiled. "See ya Carlos."

He got dressed and left. I stared at the ceiling and sighed, guilt filled my stomach. I was cheating on James with Carlos, the man who used to beat me. What kind of a basketcase did that make me? James was the sweetest guy and was a great boyfriend but he just didn't make me feel the way Carlos did. He made me feel strong and sexy and James was kind of an ass an made me feel like a child. I got out of bed and found my clothes and got in my car.

"Hey Kelly, it's Riley." I said as I pulled out of the driveway balancing my phone between my ear shoulder. "Can I come in, I have song."

"Yeah the studio's free until 3, is it new or old."

"New I mean really new, it just popped in my head."

"Okay I'll let Gustavo know. See you soon."

I hung up and continued humming what I had in my head. James' strange behavior still in my mind, he seemed so happy. Maybe I wasn't enough for him and we weren't enough each other. After making the short trip into LA I walked into the studio and smiled at Gustavo. It was just him, this was the way I liked it.

"Hey."

"So you want to record?"

I nodded, "Yeah it's choppy and not written out but I couldn't wait."

"Well, let's hear it."

I went into the booth. The same booth I had sung in almost 5 years ago when I sang Love The Way You Lie and got the shit beat out of me. I fixed my headphones and clear my throat.

"Story of my life searching for the right but it keeps avoiding me. Sorrow in my soul cause it seems that wrong really loves my company.."

All I've ever wanted was to find a guy who would treat me right but no matter how hard I try I always find myself drawn to the wrong person, Carlos.

"He's more than a man and this is more than love, the reason that the sky is blue. But the clouds are rolling in because to him I just can't be true. And I know that he knows I'm unfaithful and it kills him inside to know that I am happy with some other guy."

I held out that last note and exhaled, James was an amazing guy he saved me, protected me and made me feel better about myself. But Carlos was dark and mysterious, a fucking cliche I know but so true. James had to know something was up.

"And I don't want to do this anymore, I don't want to be the reason why every time I walk out the door I see him die a little more inside I don't want to hurt him anymore I don't want to take away his life I don't want to be a murderer."

I slipped off the headphones and stepped out. "I know it's not much but I can finish it."

"Are you seeing Carlos?"

I raised my eyebrows and sputtered. "Excuse me?"

Gustavo stared at me and bluntly repeated his question. "Are you seeing Carlos?"

"N-not like as a boyfriend but y-yeah."

Gustavo looked uncomfortable, he was never in my personal life unless I wasn't eating or needed help finding inspiration for a song. "Look, do what you want but if he makes you uncomfortable or hurts you let me know okay?"

I shrugged. "Thanks, so I'll finish the song tonight?"

He nodded. "See you tomorrow."

After packing up my things and driving home I spent the rest of the day working on my song and texting Logan, Kendall and Carlos. I was curled up watching Mean Girls and looked down at my phone when it buzzed. James was calling me and relief washed over me like a tidal wave. Maybe I choose him, maybe I would choose the right one.

"Hey, baby." I whispered.

"H-Hey Char y-you coming back you left something." His voice was slurred and full of lust.

Tears instantly pricked my eyes. I knew what was going on, Carlos would come home just like this.

"James you- Charlotte." I stammered as tears started falling. Charlotte was a model who James met last year. She was tall and thin and gorgeous. I always felt ugly compared to her. "W-Why?"

"Ri? Fucking s-shit." He groaned he fumbled with the phone and the line went dead.

I dropped the phone and covered my mouth. I let out a muffled sob into my hands. He cheated, he fucking cheated on me. James was supposed to be the good one the right one. I shut my eyes and felt my heart sink into my stomach. He was the one, he was the only one that made sense. He wasn't going to hurt me again. Carlos was it, he's the one.

AN: So team Ciley or Jiley? See you soon!