Joe's Note: After spending some time doing more comprehensive outlining of the future of this story, I'm finally back. While obviously we're going to end up merging our way into the canon events of the first game at a minimum, I wanted to figure out what - if anything - I wanted to accomplish between now and then before I went any further with this story. Spoiler alert: I figured it out. From here, we're going to get one final chapter to wrap up things in this particular time frame and then skip ahead one year for Chapter 16. We'll be spending only a brief period in 2182; Chapter 17 will bring us ahead into 2183 and cover the Marauder arriving at Eden Prime in response to the colony's frantic distress call…
Dedications & Thanks: To Nicholas, Alexander, Howard, Alonsis2, Connor, MJ, Daniel, Christopher, Janne, Eric, DireSquirrel, Joseph, mpop, RileyWestfall, bloodylord, Luke, Zachary, Marc, Ziryo, Elliot, Crusifikz70, Timothy, Leigh, Jason, Chris, George, Koby, Ken, Dimitria, William, Invernos, Paul, Pat, Joel, Kentucky Fried Dragon, Warren, Mitch, and Jess for sponsoring me on , and making it easier for me to spend more of my time writing. Additional thanks go to the incomparable LogicalPremise for his amazing set of references covering many untouched facets of the Mass Effect universe, as well as listening to me ramble about ideas for the future of this story.

"You're wearing my jumpsuit? That's an… interesting… fashion choice."

"Correction: it was your jumpsuit, Mira. It's mine now."

Miranda let out a soft snort as she glanced over at Luciana, watching as the asari turned back and forth, admiring her reflection in the mirror. While the brunette still wasn't entirely sold on a proposal that quite frankly seemed too good to be true, she'd decided to spend the night with the woman… which was to say that they had spent hours talking before eventually falling asleep together, as opposed to how Kelly Chambers 'spent the night' with any alien that showed her the slightest bit of attention. Given the almost nine centuries of age difference, they actually had surprising amount of things in common, even if the asari's sense of humor wasn't quite to Miranda's taste. If anything was going to make her say no to Luciana's offer, it would probably be the prospect of spending the rest of her life listening to terrible puns.

Or possibly the rest of Luciana's life; between her age and Miranda's genetic enhancements, they weren't sure which of them had the greater life expectancy at this point.

Wasn't 'terrible puns' a bit redundant? Were there actually any good puns?

Come morning, Miranda had decided to take a risk and order Luciana's underling to retrieve her belongings from the shuttle that she'd arrived on Omega in. Thankfully Asteria - as she'd later learned the massive asari was named - had seemed more amused than offended by her presumption, delivering a plate of steak and eggs along with Luciana's more traditionally asari breakfast before offering a mocking little bow and wandering off to fulfill Miranda's request. She'd returned by the end of their meal with a slender, limping Sylléktria named Pelesa, the pair laden with literally everything in the shuttle that hadn't been welded down.

Finding her clothing and toiletries in that mess had taken a bit of work, but that had only made the almost sinfully long shower that had followed even more enjoyable for Miranda. Apparently, Luciana hadn't been idle during that time, raiding the brunette's bags and emerging after her own time in the bathroom wearing… "You wouldn't be wrong. It's certainly never going to fit me properly again."

Her preening came to an abrupt stop and Luciana peered back over her shoulder at Miranda with a distinctly hurt expression on her face. "…are you calling me fat?"

"Since there's nobody else around to hear me say this and ruin my carefully cultivated image… Luciana, you're currently twenty pounds of ass in a ten pound sack. Likewise with your breasts. As close as I supposedly am to perfection - or at least my father's idea of it - you have a figure that makes me look like a twelve-year-old gymnast in comparison and that outfit was never meant to contain it." The corner of Miranda's mouth quirked upward at the distinctly pleased expression she received in return; even if she eventually decided for some reason that the woman's offer wasn't worth taking, building a cordial relationship with the leader of one of the strongest powers in known space could prove beneficial. "That said, it's a very good look for you. I'm surprised you're willing to wear something with a Cerberus logo on it, though. Two of them, even."

Her peculiar teal biotics erupted around Luciana's hand as she made a pulling motion, summoning her cloak to her and swinging it onto her shoulders. It settled into place perfectly over the white marks that adorned each shoulder of the black and orange jumpsuit while doing absolutely nothing to disrupt the view of the asari's deep cleavage. Pulling the hood up until it covered her eyes, Luciana gave herself a final once over in the mirror before spinning around and extending a hand to Miranda. "Would you be willing to serve as my seeing-eye human for the morning, or should I summon Asteria?"

Reaching out, Miranda took the woman's hand cautiously and then stiffened as she was bombarded by images: walking through cities with predominantly asari architecture that still showed distinctly alien influence, moving amongst asari of every shape and size clad in purple, gold, and white. Interacting with a Prothean beacon to summon a green-tinged hologram of what looked like a Collector but Miranda instinctively knew to be a true prothean. Spending time relaxing on the veranda of a seaside home, surrounded by… they would be her step-children and step-grandchildren if she took Luciana's offer, wouldn't they? Sitting at an ornate desk while poring over files that documented herself and dozens of other sentient beings in exhaustive detail. With a gasp, Miranda wrenched her hand out of Luciana's and stumbled back, staring at the woman with wide eyes. "What… what was that?"

Luciana returned Miranda's wide-eyed look of surprise for a few seconds before throwing her head back and laughing loudly. Taking a step forward, she brushed her fingers over Miranda's tentatively, eliciting another brief flash of imagery before grinning widely. "That was you proving yourself to be even more magnificent than I could have anticipated. Protheans were capable of something akin to what you would call psychometry; they possessed an experiential exchange system based on physical touch. Mánteis like myself have inherited that ability from our aithntars."

"Experiential exchange system?" Miranda brushed her fingers over the back of Luciana's hand hesitantly, closing her eyes so that the flash of images didn't disorient her this time. This time, she was gifted with a view of her own face through Luciana's eyes, her own eyes closed and an expression of almost childlike wonder on her face. Pulling away, she did her best to smooth her face into a more serious and thoughtful expression as she rolled that information around in her head. "So essentially you're capable of melding in a completely separate way from how the rest of your species melds?"

Shaking her head, Luciana summoned a pair of gloves with her biotics, tugging them on before reaching up to adjust her hood until it covered her eyes once more. "Closer to linking or bonding at best, but distinctly different from either. Much less invasive and it's generally an unidirectional exchange unless we deliberately choose to reciprocate knowledge. But you? Your mind is so strong that you're managing to instinctively latch onto the connection and follow it back into my own mind. I imagine that it's a disorienting barrage of images for you..?" She paused, waiting for Miranda to nod her assent before continuing. "It always is at first. With time and practice, you might be able to learn to purposefully read any Mántis who touches you." Grinning widely, Luciana took Miranda's hand and interlaced their fingers. "And you wonder why I chose you?"

Miranda peered down at their joined hands before pulling away, looping her arm through Luciana's before slipping her hand back into the asari's. "It'll be easier to guide you this way. And to answer your question, I believe it was chiefly because of my biotics, my eyes, and my ass, although you did take a number of others factors into consideration." Luciana leaned back a bit at that, pointedly staring down at Miranda's ass and smirking. "I have no idea what you see in it, especially compared to your own figure… but I suppose the appreciation is flattering nonetheless. Oh, and for the record? Sir Mix-a-Lot wasn't actually a knight. That was just his stage name."

"Truly?"

"I'm quite certain."

"How profoundly disappointing. I would have found a way to properly recognize his achievements."

"…he wrote a song about women with big butts."

"He promoted the appreciation of fine female forms."

Well, technically she wasn't wrong…

"I just realized something. Alyona-"

"Harry? I realize that our relationship has just entered previously unknown territory and all, but it's still not appropriate to talk about other women when you're in bed. 'Other women' simply includes one less woman than it did yesterday."

"Seeing as how you two are lying on my arms right now… Epee, would you be a dear and swat Luna upside the head for me?" Harry watched as Epipsychidion reached across his body hesitantly, swatting the side of Luna's head and earning a soft huff from the blonde. "Thank you. Now, as I was saying? Alyona. You were out and about longer than I was yesterday; did Aria talk you into reversing my transfiguration before you apparated back here with Luciana and Epee?" Luna slowly shook her head, a curious expression on her face. "Because I obviously didn't it before coming back here, and you and I may very well be the only two people in existence at this point who can. Which means that the poor woman is still stuck as a platypus."

Rolling off of Harry, Luna let the sheets slip down to pool around her waist as she rose into a sitting position, stretching languidly before finally nodding her acquiescence. "It would be rather rude of us to leave her like that, especially if we're going to pack up and follow Epee back to Óasi. I'll do that after Luciana stops by to introduce us to Miranda… which I hope is soon, because she's got rather extensive medical training and I'm pretty sure that you have a cracked pelvis, Harry." Leaning over, she retrieved her wand from the bedside table and waved it over his body in a complex pattern. Epipsychidion let out a gasp of surprise as a faintly glowing rendition of Harry's skeleton rose up out of his body, mostly bluish-white with two angry red streaks marring his right ilium. "I stand corrected. She rode you so hard that she cracked your pelvis twice."

Well, that explained the persistent burning pain in his hips, Harry mused. It was actually a fairly evenly distributed pain, which left him surprised that he didn't have matching fractures on the opposite side, especially given the cause of the injury. Reaching up, he forced his own magic into the construct and took control of it, enlarging the model to get a better look at the damage to his pelvis before eventually dispelling it with a flick of his fingers. "I'm not even going to ask who Miranda is or why Luciana is going to bring her here, but do we really have to wait until then to treat this? I've had worse, but it's not exactly the most pleasant feeling in the world."

"Miranda Lawson. Luna mentioned her last night just after Luciana left; this one still finds your 'legilimency' discomfiting and so she would prefer to provide the details rather than hear about how Luna picked through her leader's mind." Epipsychidion gingerly shifted so that she was no longer lying halfway atop Harry, remaining tucked under his right arm and twining a leg around his as she rested her cheek on his shoulder. It was a little surprising how comfortable they were together, Harry mused, what with his reluctance to make the jump to a polyamorous relationship combined with Epipsychidion's rustiness when it came to both physical and emotional intimacy. What didn't surprise him at all was that despite the asari's desire to take things slowly, it hadn't taken Luna more than fifteen minutes to peel Epipsychidion out of her armor and end up with her head between a pair of toned blue thighs.

By the time Luna finally let Epipsychidion catch her breath, Harry had come to the conclusion that the bell couldn't exactly be unwrung and decided to just… go with things for once in his life. Not being the largest person in the bed had definitely been a bit weird - Epipsychidion had roughly as many inches on him as Harry did on Luna - but it hadn't been a bad weird. Just weird. Well, her quickly aborted attempt to turn him into the little spoon while cuddling between rounds of sex had been a bad weird, but they'd laughed it off and moved on easily enough. And… wait. She was speaking. Harry shook his head to clear it of idle thoughts before offering Epipsychidion an apologetic smile. "I'm sorry, I was a million miles away. Can you start over for me?"

Despite the handful of similarities to Hermione that Harry had already noticed, Epipsychidion thankfully lacked the vague sense of condescension that the brunette exuded when it came to exchanges of knowledge, offering him a faint smile before fulfilling his request. "Miranda is a Cerberus operative and the singularly most genetically modified human known to exist at present. Frightfully intelligent even by Sylléktrion standards, the holder of multiple doctorates spanning a variety of medical and scientific disciplines, and the third most powerful human biotic on record. The head of Cerberus and Miranda's father are currently engaged in a convoluted, long-term plan to deceive Miranda and keep her subservient and bound to the organization. Luciana planned to expose their duplicity in an effort to sway Miranda into joining the Sylléktries."

Leaning across Harry's body, Luna gently trailed her fingers over Epipsychidion's crest as the asari spoke, following the patterns of flickering light backward and waiting until the older woman was finished before offering her two knuts. "I'm looking forward to meeting her because she's a bit of a boff; seeing her reaction to magic is going to be hilarious. And she's got a nice arse… for a human woman at least."

Harry blinked at that, turning away from Epipsychidion's bemused face to peer up at Luna curiously. "When you say something like that, you do remember that you're a human woman, right? And that most of the women you've tried to get me to sleep with are humans too?"

"Yes and now that I've discovered the existence of asari, I have higher standards for the arses than I used to. It's called personal growth and self-improvement, Harry."

While he was pretty sure that wasn't actually self-improvement in the least, Harry was even more sure that Luna was having him on and so he shook his head in amusement rather than take the bait. Then something occurred to him and he frowned, glancing from Luna to Epipsychidion and back. "Wait a minute. If I'm not supposed to bring up Alyona in bed because she's another woman, why are you allowed to talk about-"

"Nobody here wants to sleep with Miranda. It's a totally different situation."

"I don't want to sleep with Alyona!"

"Who said anything about you?"

"If that's the case, then why are we allowed to talk about Luciana?"

"…you've got me there."

Harry chuckled, leaning up so that he could give Luna a peck on the lips and then wincing as his hip protested the fairly minute movement. "Well now that we've settled that, can you get up and dig out some Skele-Gro for me? Even if modern medicine has caught up enough to fix me as quickly as magic can, I'd really much rather meet Luciana's new flame with some pants on." A strange, harsh blatting noise filled the apartment and while Harry had never heard it before - Krína and Aria had both entered without asking, and Luna had apparated Luciana and Epipsychidion directly into their apartment - he had a sinking suspicion that he knew exactly what it meant. "Of course they're here. Luna? Epee? Not exactly up for running around at the moment."

Pushing up off the bed, Epipsychidion let out a faint squeak and brought a hand up to catch the sliding sheet, pinning it to her chest before it could slip too far down. It was an entirely unnecessary attempt at modesty given what they'd been up to for the past… what, half a day, give or take an hour or two? But while the modesty was unnecessary, her move brought home a very salient problem: none of them were exactly dressed for guests at the moment. Not that he could really do anything about it at the moment - how had he not noticed how much pain he was in before now? - but Epipsychidion and Luna… actually, Luna didn't seem to mind her state of undress at all. Rising from the bed without a care, she casually crossed the room heedless of her nudity, stopping in front of the door and studying the glowing circle that hovered in the middle of it. It took her a few seconds to figure out how to manipulate the electronic locking mechanism, and then the door opened with a hiss to reveal the exact two visitors that Luna had predicted. "You must be Miranda. I saw a great many things about you in Luciana's head, most of them good. Tell me, has she talked you into letting her eat your ass yet?"

"…you know such charming people, Luciana." Several inches taller than Luna, Miranda could easily peer over the top of the blonde's head, her eyes widening in surprise as she took in the sight of a covered - but still quite obviously naked - Harry and Epipsychidion on the bed. Her eyes narrowed and she slowly turned to stare at Luciana, her voice becoming drier than one of Hagrid's rock cakes. "Dear Fornax Forum, I never thought this would happen to me, but…"

Luciana raised her hands in surrender before pointing one finger at Luna. "I have absolutely no idea what's going on here, but I'm reasonably certain that she's the one to blame for it."

Rolling her eyes, Luna grabbed Miranda by the wrist and tugged, dragging the taller woman through the doorway and then across the apartment to where Harry and Epipsychidion were waiting. "If you could both get your minds out of the gutter, I would appreciate it. Poor Harry is injured and since Miranda has extensive medical training, we decided to wait until you two arrived rather than trying to take him somewhere for treatment."

That statement seemed to catch Miranda's attention, the bemused smirk on her face falling away in favor of a more serious expression. "What happened? It can't be too serious if you were willing to wait until-"

"It turns out that Epee has been suppressing certain urges for so long that when she finally gave in for the first time since the Glorious Revolution, she rode Harry so hard that she broke his hip." Releasing Miranda's wrist, Luna moved to sit on the bed beside Epipsychidion, rubbing the asari's crests gently as she shot Miranda a wink. "I mean, I'm hardly innocent here: shagged Harry twice myself, and was a terribly wicked influence on poor innocent Epee. But she's the one who rode him five separate times and the one who was atop him when the actual injury occurred, so I believe the blame is technically hers?"

"I repeat: charming." Miranda shook her head as she activated her omni-tool, circling around the bed to stand at Harry's left before leaning in and scanning him. She frowned as she waved the device back and forth, generating a holographic readout that - save for the orange tinge - was shockingly similar to the one that Luna had created using magic. "Interestingly enough, she's not wrong. Two stress fractures to the right ilium. You must be in incredible pain right now." Harry shrugged lackadaisically; he'd had worse. Miranda shook her head before shutting down her omni-tool and turning to look at Luciana. "Since I'm assuming that it's my job to fix this, I'm going to need you to send Asteria back to our room to retrieve some equipment for me. And while we wait for her to deliver it, we're going to discuss your idea of sticking me with this pair of Luddites until I can bring them into the twenty-second century and exactly what an appropriate additional fee for such a service might be…"