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Chapter 13- Edward

I stayed in bed as Bella showered. Shifting, I pushed my face into the pillow and breathed deeply, taking in her lingering scent. I pulled the pillow to me, hugging it and praying that the day ahead would go as Alice had predicted. We were starting Bella's training, and it would be the first real test of her control. I clung to Alice's vision that Bella would prevail successfully.

I listened to the water of the shower, paying attention to how the sound slowed when it hit her body. Tightening my grip on the pillow, I tried to free myself of all the possessiveness coursing through me. I had seen Alice's visions, most ending well for Bella but there was always the possibility of failure and I wanted to protect her from it. I wanted to protect her from anything that would hurt her, even herself.

As the water turned off, I rolled over and tossed the pillow aside. It was almost time to go.

We all piled into Emmett's jeep with Emmett driving, Rose riding shot gun, and Alice, Jasper, Bella and I in the back. We had reserved four small cabins right outside the park in a secluded area. Carlisle was working, but he and Esme would join us later in the evening. Emmett turned his hat backwards and cranked the music up loud to show off his new stereo. Bella was seated next to me, her hand in mine; she had laid my hand down flat, and then slid her hand over mine. As her fingers moved across my palm I felt a tingling and I knew her shield was on me. We tried to tune out the blasting R&B with our thoughts.

How I loved these silent conversations, to be able to fully communicate without actually speaking was amazing, and it made me feel so connected to her.

She was letting her mind wander, imagining herself sitting next to me in a classroom full of students, and then at the movies. She pictured herself in a huge ballet studio surrounded by of group of dancers, she was dancing, but her fantasy didn't do her justice. When I watched her dance, her body moved so effortlessly and was beyond graceful. I could picture her in my head; I had been looking through the window when she was dancing to a Radiohead song- her hair down, wearing a simple leotard and yoga pants. She danced in a style that I had never seen, possibly modern dance, but whatever it was, it fit the music perfectly and it was breathtaking. I was still embarrassed at having been caught spying on her.

Bella looked over and leaned in to give me a kiss, and as I put my arm around her and kissed her back, her hand moved to my inner thigh.

Jasper scowled at us.

Hey! Don't even think about it. Do not start getting all worked up right now. Not while we are in the car. Tone down the sexy vibes.

"Sorry Jazz. I forgot.'' Bella giggled.

As we drove, Bella was using her gift again. She covered Jasper and then started throwing emotions around. She sent Rose into a fit of laughter, she made Emmett super paranoid- he almost turned the car around to go back home before Jasper could calm him down. She possessed something very powerful, and it was fascinating to watch her explore her gift. I would have to ask Carlisle if he ever found any information in his research of shields.

Bella started giggling again, her head buried in my chest, then looked at Alice who was trying not to laugh.

"Sorry Bella, That was not what I was looking for," Alice said.

I scanned Alice's thoughts. She was trying to foresee if anything would happen this weekend and she got a sneak peak at a private moment between herself and Jasper. I had to laugh.

"What's so funny?"Jasper inquired.

"You'll see." Alice replied.

The ride seemed to go by quickly. Every once in a while Bella would expand her shield and listen to my thoughts and everyone else's.

Wow, Edward. All the voices... How do you deal with it?

I've had ninety years to get used to it...

Emmett turned down the music for a moment and said, "Hey, Bell, We are getting close. I am going to keep my window down. Be prepared."

As the light human scent drifted through the window, Bella tightened her grip on my hand and I noticed her swallowing down the venom, but she kept her self composed, barely phased by it.

No more shield for you Edward. I don't want to waste my energy keeping it too far from me. I want to be focused for this.

I kissed her cheek and nodded in approval. Emmett parked the jeep, he and Rosalie headed out first. They checked out the area, scouting out locations and keeping an eye out for humans. After about ten minutes, Emmett's voice was in my head.

Edward, head north, about thirty miles.

We all walked at a human pace into the woods, but once we were out of sight from the road we ran to meet Emmett and Rosalie who were waiting for us in a small clearing.

"There's a hiking trail quite close by. Six humans will be making their way past here soon." Emmett said. "How are you feeling Bell?"

"I'm feeling good about this. I'm ready, but please keep close to me, just in case..." She stood tall, proud, and ready.

"Let's start walking. We have two minutes before we will be able to smell them," Alice said.

We walked toward the path and I knew Bella could smell them. Her grip on my hand was painful.

Emmett strolled over. "Feeling like you want a snack?"

Rosalie smacked him. "We are here to help her, not antagonize her."

Bella let go of my hand. "I'm fine."

She walked over to a large tree and peeked around the side. I could hear the thoughts of two humans and I moved closer to her. She took a breath and dug her nails into the trunk of the tree, scraping down and leaving large gouges. Jasper and Emmett had both moved to my side, ready to restrain her if necessary. She stopped breathing and her hands moved in a frenzy over the scrapings on the tree. She stopped and stepped away with a smile. She had carved her name in the tree trunk.

"You guys can relax now. I'm not going to eat them."

Jasper looked at me. She is doing good. Really good.

We wandered the forest staying fairly close to humans, but always out of their sight. Bella was maintaining her composure, the presence of a human was definitely affecting her, but she was determined to overcome her thirst. She stopped and looked up at me.

"Do you think we could take a break from this and maybe hunt? My throat is killing me." She looked so innocent, but bothered. My poor angel was hurting and I didn't like it.

"I don't see why not."

We ran far away from any trails, then out of the park all together. Emmett began to laugh.

"Yes! I can smell it. A grizzly. You want it Bell?" He asked.

"You go for it, Em. I know it's your favorite," she replied.

"But you have never tasted grizzly before. I bet you'll love it. It's a big one, it will fill you right up. Let's play for it. Paper, rock, scissors?" He asked.

"Sounds fair," she said then kissed me and quickly expanded her shield onto me.

I couldn't help it. I'm a cheater through and through. He is going to use scissors, then paper, paper.

I wanted her to win over Emmett. I wanted her sated. And... if I may, Emmett has always been a sore loser. Having him beaten by a girl would give me some good teasing material for later.

Emmett's scissors versus Bella's rock:

"Two out of three," Emmett said.

Emmett's paper versus Bella's scissors:

"I win." Bella said as she turned and winked at me.

"Hey, you cheated. You and your little shield, you are just as bad as Edward," whined Emmett.

"Let's race for it. Edward can't help me run," she offered.

"You are on," he replied and without another word they both took off. We all followed. Bella was right behind him, Emmett was darting in and out of trees and heavy brush trying to lose her, but she kept up with him. He stopped and looked back. There was a human scent and it was strong, someone must be close. I looked at Bella who was standing still with her hands balled into fists. She looked in the direction of the human and then ran the opposite way toward the bear. She was running so fast that by the time we caught up to her, she held the lifeless bear in her arms. Blood streamed down her lips and chin, her shirt was ripped right down the middle, and her left pant leg was shredded. I walked up to her.

"You amaze me," I said, leaning down to lick the blood away.

She shuddered and pulled away. "I did it. The scent was trying to rule me, but I wouldn't let it. I won't let it." She threw herself into my arms, and I looked down to see the bare skin of her stomach. As I placed my hands on her waist, she took a deep breath.

"Can we take a break? I want to be alone with you," she murmured, then looked up at me with an unmistakable look of arousal.

"Hold that thought. The others are coming."

Alice and Jasper ran up to us moments later; Emmett and Rosalie followed shortly after.

"Holy shit, Bell! You took it down and drained it in record time, I'm impressed. Oh, and nice shirt- is that from the bear or Edward?" Emmett laughed.

I stepped toward him, growling. "You jackass. You led her right to a human."

"Sorry, man, I didn't plan to. Who cares? She is holding her own just fine," he said.

Why don't you get to the cabin? You could help her get changed...

Alice came over and put her arm around Bella. "See, I told you that you would be fine, nothing to worry about. Carlisle and Esme should be here by now. Let's get to the cabins and let Bella get some new clothes on."

Alice and Bella ran together. I really enjoyed watching the two of them bond. Jasper and I ran behind them.

"She is doing great, Edward. I wish you could feel the conviction coming from her. It's inspiring..." he said.

She makes it look easy. Too easy... Am I the only one who has struggled so hard?

"It is hard for all of us, Jazz," I replied.

Were you reading her thoughts?

"No, she kept her shield in for the most part. Were you picking up any emotions from her?"

There was no major bloodlust. A little fear, a mass of relief once she restrained herself, and some other things... She is waiting for you and she is getting impatient. You two are taking the cabin at the far end. Have fun!

He laughed as he ran off. I ran to our cabin and knocked, when Bella opened the door the look in her eyes was one that I had never seen before. Her eyes were dark and frantic. She put her hands on my shoulders, and was shaking slightly. Before I knew what was happening, I heard the door slam and I was on the floor, Bella on top of me, straddling me. She ripped off my shirt and ran her tongue across my chest.

I need you

We tore off each other's clothes, and she took me on the floor with wild abandon, like an animal. It was the single most erotic experience of my existence, like nothing before in the meadow. It wasn't making love. It was raw. It was primal. Her thoughts consisted of one thing. Me... She hungered for my touch, she craved my body. It was pure desire and it was mutual. Afterward, we lay on the floor on our backs.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

I sat up and leaned over her, running my hand down her jaw. "You don't ever have to apologize for doing that to me. That was, wow, um... There are no words to describe that."

"It's just... I don't know what came over me. I feel like I attacked you." She put her hands on my chest, her soft fingers running down my rib cage.

"I suppose you did attack me," I said and grinned at her, "But I really didn't mind in the slightest." We broke into laughter; she wrapped her arms around me and became silent. She shifted her body to the side and I lay behind, spooning her. I couldn't help but marvel over how smooth her skin was and how good it felt when our bare skin met. I wasn't sure how much time had passed; it could have been minutes or hours. Feeling Bella this close to me was paradise, I could have laid there forever. It was as though she was an extension of me.

Usually, Bella lifted her shield when we were this close, but at this moment her mind was silent to me. She shifted her body leaving a tiny space between us. I felt an ache in my stomach, and I tried to pull her closer to me, but she hesitated.

"Bella, what's wrong?"

"When you're this close to me, I have a hard time keeping my shield to myself. I don't want you to know what I'm thinking about right now. I'm sorry." She moved again, creating more space in between us.

I slowly pulled myself back from her, and I couldn't help but feel slightly rejected. There was something that she didn't want me to know, and I had no business hearing the errant thoughts that filled her mind, yet I had never longed to read someone's mind so badly.

"It is all right, Bella. I understand." I gave her a quick peck on the cheek and stood up to get changed. Bella stood and we both looked to see a fresh set of clothes for each of us on the bed.

"Alice?" She asked.

"When it comes to clothes, it is always Alice. She is forever prepared to dress us all."

A knock sounded on the door.