Hi again,

Okay this is quite a long one- but hold out its a good one :)

xoxo

New years

And so the event of the year

The thing this whole week has been building up to is now upon us

And the only thing that is confusing/ clouding my mind is what to name me and Four

Yes we have kissed and this week we have spent so much time together, yet I still don't have a label for us

I bite the inside of my cheek as I watch Chris funnel the alcohol into the hip flasks to take round with us

Bonus of the night is that Aunt Cathy is in work all night- so it doesn't matter what time I make it in

Lack of curfew urges me even more into drinking than I was before

And with the nerves I want to drink more

I take a quick swig before handing the bottle back to Chris

Will is sat on the couch trying to find a decent channel to watch music on

'You two do realise that this is our first time pre drinking' He shouts over the back of the couch to us

I can't help but smile, no matter what happens tonight I get to enter the New Year with my two best friends next to me

Once a song is found we sit around my table, passing the drinks along having a quick laugh and catch up

The main reason pre drinks is happening is because we have all decided to walk- and with the weather still being below freezing unless me and Chris want to lose a boob a beer jacket is the only way

'So how come Al isn't hear' I ask pulling my legs up, still not prepared to put on my dress for the night for the fear of how cold it is outside

'Football gang are making their own way over '

I nod smiling, yet another good thing tonight- I won't have to shoot Al down

And thankfully the couple at the table are keeping it completely PG13 for me, nothing awkward

I smile standing and dancing- pulling Chris up with me

Making our own little dance party, yet another Idea to warm up

Before I know it Chris is pushing me towards the stairs to go and get dressed

I pout but make my way up

After our successful shopping trip I have more than enough things to choose from to wear tonight and while the staple little black dress is laid out on the bed I change my mind

Going into my wardrobe I pull out my new skin tight black jeans inlaid with leather and a small crop top with a lot of glittering things on

After a few seconds of searching I find the boots that I am looking for

Ankle length with buckles and a sizable heel and platform

I pull my hair from the curlers that Chris had out in them earlier

After running through with my fingers one I feel ready for the night

Smiling as I put a small amount of Red on my lips I head down, ready to make the horrible walk to Zeke's house

Taking an old Backpack we make Will carry the bottles and head out

I regret not taking a jacket five minutes into the walk

I didn't know that my belly button could get cold- but that is what it is

'Soooooo….' Will says trying to keep up with mine and Chris's brisk pace

He's the one wearing a shirt and a top under it, boy must be sweating

And I'm jealous

'So, what?' I say folding my arms, and regretting it instantly as my top comes up higher and my cold arms touch the bare skin

'You and Four' He smiles nudging me slightly and winking

I just stair and turn to Chris who has instantly started walking a little faster

'Bitch' I shout after her

'What about us?' I say getting defensive

Even I don't know what me and him are, or why are names fit together

Well if our names fit as well as our lips I'm happy

I smile to myself

'Was that a smile- god Tris you like him' He says nudging me yet again

'Okay, okay I like him so what' I pout slightly

'I think he likes you to' He says, pulling on a sober face

'What makes you think that? You hardly know him- like I hardly know him' I say, adding the doubt back to my head from when I first questioned why he would ever even like me

'Well I've been around Uriah's a lot lately, and he subtly tries to ask about you. Just stupid little things' I can't help but smile at that

I nudging him back and run to keep up with Chris

And in that second it dawned on me

Running in heels is a lot harder than expected

I laugh as my knees disagree with the movement

Once we reach Chris she stops, only a couple of feet away from our destination

Handing out the hipflasks

On the count of three we down the contents and stash them away back into our bags

We end up being late, but for some reason I think that just made the whole thing a little better

I'm starting to feel slightly tipsy and with the added heat of walking into a full room I feel my face suddenly flush

I scan the room for Four but can't seem to find him any where

However my eyes do land on Uriah stood by the entrance to the kitchen

Grabbing Chris's hand to make sure that she knew that I was on the move, and for her and Will to follow we make our way to the kitchen

Which unlike last time seems to be just a little bit busier

Smiling we push our way out the back door

Uriah knowing our moves makes his way out there before we get the chance to even get through most of the room

Once outside I am once again grateful for the fresh air

Stepping out I take a deep breath

'Why hello sexy' Uriah says winking at me and passing me a cup

I laugh and take the drink, taking a big gulp starting to feel thirsty

'Looks like a lot more people have turned up this time' I say

Now it's just me and Uriah talking now Chris and Will have now accepted it that time to start exploring each other

Looks like babysitting me is now not a priority

'Yer pretty much, it's getting a little crazy- however it is nice to see some faces that are familiar' He says tapping the edge of his cup to mine

I smile taking a sip, letting my eyes sweep the yard- still no sight of him

'You any good at throwing?' Uriah says placing down his empty cup

'Pretty good why'

'Beer pong' He grabs my arm and pulls me around the side of the house

As we are passing the window to the kitchen I see Four just stepping into the room, the temptation to just pull my arm away and run back nearly wins

But then logic takes over, Fours still going to be there after a game of beer pong

Uriah pushes his way to the front and demands attention- and that we play next

He leaves me for a second to go grab some beers, I convince him to pick up the bottle of Rum as well

Once back we set up the table

I have never played before but I feel like I have the skills for this

We fill half of the cups with beer, and the other with rum and coke

I'm not much of a beer drinker and there was no way I was getting the blame from Zeke about his younger brother getting way to drunk before I get chance to get drunk myself

The side door to the house opens and music begins to fill in

And thankfully the door stays open

I move better to a beat, I bounce on the balls of my feet trying to guess which cup to get the ball in

Landing my first ball on my first go

Everyone shouts, and I begin to feel the hype

And with that hype I begin to get cocky and that is where I began to fail

We were winning, I had only had to drink three drinks so far- but I also was the only one to land a ball

I jump up and down high fiving Uriah for landing yet another ball, and out the corner of my eye near the doorway I notice Four

But before I even get the chance to wave or say hi he left the room

I turn back smiling- this game was not over and when it was I was going to find him

However things in the game go worse, Uriah decide on a rum and coke- which did not agree with him

Leaving me table standing on my own- once a beer landed I couldn't not drink it

Peer pressure or something

I down the drink, placing down the cup

Acting like I wasn't getting more and drunk with each drink

I must have a goofy smile on my lips

We are down to two cups each and my wingman was still out for business

Safe to say I lost- but I put up a good fight

I stepped back out into the cool, standing a little uneasy

I pat Uriah on the back as he still continues to throw up in the bin and make my way back to our drinks

Pouring myself a weaker drink and heading back inside

I can't see anyone in the kitchen that I really want to stop and talk to

In the front room I catch will and Chris dancing- not wanting to interrupt I begin to walk around the room clockwise

Till I notice Al, who is looking considerably drunk

I turn back and right into Zeke's group, nearly knocking over some small girl

'Oh god- I am so sorry' I say grabbing for her, making sure she doesn't land on her arse

' Tris- Marlene- Tris, nice way to introduce yourself pip squeak' Zeke say laughing and pulling me into the circle properly

'So what did you do to my brother then?' He says winking

Making the group laugh

I feel myself blushing

'He just can't handle his alcohol' I say shrugging

Obtaining a laugh from the group again

That's when I notice four on the other side of the room

Stood talking to some guy, I smile excusing myself

I start to make my way across the room

However my luck seems to have ran out

Al corners me, in my not so quick thinking brain

Thanks Rum

I let myself get backed into a corner; I try not to look uncomfortable

'Fancy a dance' He says leaning in closer

Just a little to close

Next minuet a small body is pressed between up and pushing Al away from me

'I do big boy' A very cute voice says

Marlene starts to lead Al away from me

Whispering over her shoulder how I owe her

I make a heart shape with my hands and begin the search for Four yet again

He's not where I saw him before

After doing a lap of the downstairs I make my way up stairs

Some guys tries to stop me, but I nod at Zeke and he nods saying I was cool to go back

I don't know how he even got body guard type people to watch his house on parties like this

I begin looking around, finding a bathroom

What is clearly Uriah's mess of a room

Then I find him

Laying on Zeke's bed, one hand across his face

He sits up as he hears the door open, he looks angry at first but that anger evaporates when he realises it's me

'Hey' I say stepping into the room and closing the door behind me and leaning on it for balance

'Tris are you drunk' He says

Cocking his head a little to the side , like a cute puppy

Which in turn makes me laugh

If I was ever going to convince him that I am not drunk that was not the best response to give

He hands me over a glass

I take it, taking a small sip and quite happy to find that it was water

I go and sit next to him, lying on the bed waiting for him to lie down next to me

Once his head is on the pillow next to me I get the courage to say what I want to say

'I like you' I whisper

The music not so over bearing up hear

'What?' He says leaning on his side, watching me now

'I said I like you' I turn on my side

'Tris' He says, his voice going soft

'I'm just confused' I say leaning back, and staring at the ceiling again

'By what?' He stays in the same position

However to get the truth out I need to not look at him, because if I do whatever balls I have grown will shrivel up and die

'By you, one minuet it seems like you want me, the next it feels like you are avoiding me- it's confusing'

'Tris, I like you- I just don't know how to handle you' He says

This time flopping back onto the bed

'And that means'

We lay next to each other in silence for a few seconds

'Tris, you look so small land fragile- but you aren't, you are fierce and sometimes downright aggressive, and that confuses me. I don't know how to treat you, and I don't want to scare you off'

I smile at that

I have changed his mind, he no longer sees me as this small weak little girl

'Your aren't going to scare me off- like I said Four I like you'

He is silent for a moment longer, I then hear him gulp

Looking over I see he has his own hip flask

I smile, a small plan coming to mind

Being drunk has brought out something in me that I like

I snatch the flask from him, pulling it further back when he grabs for it

I shake my head and sit cross legged

'I've got a game'

He smiles a little and leans up on one arm

'Oh really- what is this game'

'I ask a question, if the answer is yes- you drink, if it's no you pass it to me' I say

'Okay but you are starting first' He says now not trying to take the flask from my hand

'Fine by me' I say

'Why do you like me' He askes

I smile deeper 'Only yes or no questions'

'Okay, okay- do you want to kiss me' He asks, watching my response

My heart beats a little faster

I tag a swig from the bottle and notice a little smirk on his lips

I pass the flask over, and over the course of the next five questions I build up the courage to ask the question I really want the answer for

I pass the flask back, leaving just enough for a drink in it

So if he says yes there is something to drink

'Do you want to go out with me' I ask

Feeling my heart beat faster, and to be honest feeling just a little bit like I want to throw up

A couple of second pass

And then he lifts the flask up to drink, we both seem scared by his response

I lean forward, pressing my lips against his

I can taste the vodka that still lingers on them

Maybe that's why I feel sick- switching from Rum to vodka

He pulls me closer, deepening the kiss

I'm more than happy to oblige, my heart is beating and a warmness is spreading from my stomach downwards

I sigh into the kiss, starting to feel the way that we are sat on the bed is a little awkward

I move one leg over his hips

In seconds his hands are on my hips, lifting me up and in his arms

I moan against his lips, feeling way to hot

All I wanted to do was take off my clothes, in fact itching to do it

I push Four back, and begin to lift my top up, but before the bottom of my bra is even shown I am flipped over on my back

My arms pinned above my head, a small gasp leaves my lips before Four places his on mine again

I squirm under him; the only contact I can feel is his hands over my wrists and his lips

But I want more

'Tris' He whispers pulling way, I look at him stilling the movements of my body and taking deep breaths

Fuck

I need to calm whatever is happening right now right away

'I think… I think we need to lay ground rules' I stop talking to lick my lips

Four nods, looking down at me

Before letting go he moves a little further down the bed that I wanted him to

But then again I can't complain- granted I only tried to take my top off

But with the alcohol coursing through me I don't think I would have stopped

'Okay I want to be straight up- also because I'm a little drunk I think saying this will be less embarrassing- Four, I'm a virgin'

Well that was bullshit- I was just as nervous telling him now as I was at thinking about it when sober

'That makes two of us Tris' He whispers, I watch him

How on god's green earth can this man still be a virgin

'What?'

'More shocked that I am' He smiles slightly

'Yes, have you seen you?' I gesture with my hands, and this time I get a real laugh

And its deep and husky and downright sexy – I feel a spark of lust creep back in

'Tris, It's not like I haven't dated- Just no one ever captivated my attention long enough'

'But I have?' I say it before I could even think about it

Sober Tris is going to have a few things to say to drunk Tris in the morning

'Yes' He says, the smile staying on his face

I feel myself blush- which seems stupid considering the position this man just had me in

'Okay ground rules- we need to keep things like that to a minimum….. for now' I say pointing to the bed we were had just been on

'I'd say done deal but'

'I know- how about we set stages' I say smiling

'You want to list the things we can do?' He questions, a crooked smile now on his lips

'Not list them, but if we are going to move slowly then we have to move with the step- there are things… other things than sex- that…. Erm….. we can both….. enjoy- when we feel comfortable with it'

Fuck what am I even doing

I shake my head, even to me that sounded stupid, we are only just dating

Yes I am accepting his gulp of a drink as an acceptance to be my boyfriend

I really hope sober Tris remembers this

He laughs again and I blush harder

'That's fine with me- what about dates' He's now moving closer

'What?'

'Well- I feel like I should take you on at least one date, before you start planning out our whole sex life' He laughs kissing my softly on the lips

I laugh

'Yes- I'd love a date'

I kiss him back, still a little cautious

'I'd say tomorrow but you seem a little drunk- a hangover will be unavoidable'

I laugh and kiss him again

I stand to stretch and say we should head back to the party when cheering and craziness happens

'Happy new year' He says

Stepping towards me, kissing me softly on the lips

So new Years- what did you guys think ?

xoxo

Sammy