Disclaimer: All rights reserved to Rick Riordan. I own nothing, but the plot.
This story discusses the themes of self-harm, anxiety, and depression. Trigger warning. Do not read if any of these things upset you. Trigger warning!
Criticism is appreciated, but please no hate. Please review and leave suggestions! Enjoy!
Nico's POV:
Percy and Nico had talked for hours, walking around the camp. They stopped on the beach and watched the sun as it rose. As the sky brightened, the camp started to wake up and start the activities of the day. The two were silent, not wanting to ruin the peace that sunrise brought. Nico was the first to break it.
"Well, I have to say, Percy, you really did lay it on me," Nico joked.
"Too much?" Percy asked, nervously.
"No- I mean- well, it was a lot, but I did say that I was willing to listen and I meant that. I am still willing to listen whenever you need me." Nico assured.
Nico thought back to months prior. When Percy asked him to lead the crew to the Doors of Death, he had done it because of his crush on Percy. He would have done anything for him. And he still would. But, not in a romantic kind of way. Nico wanted to be loyal to his friends.
"I appreciate that. It's nice to have someone to talk to." Percy emphasized the last couple of words. Not so subtly hinting that he thought Nico should do the same.
Nico rolled his eyes. "Oh, stop that."
"In all seriousness though, I really did appreciate it. Some of those things… I haven't even told Annabeth before. It gets…"
"Difficult?" Nico finished. "Like she doesn't understand?"
Percy looked at him with broken eyes. "I love her to pieces, but I know that what I can do scared her. It scared me. And it makes it easier to have another person to talk to. That's not my significant other."
"That's how I feel with Will." Confusion filled Percy's eyes. "I mean about the whole not understanding thing. What I can do, what I have done, that would scare him. I'm just not readying to come to terms with it."
Percy clapped Nico on the shoulder. "I know that, but you will have to face it eventually. But, you don't have to face it alone. You shouldn't be alone. Not anymore. We're here for you. We are your family."
"I know, Percy, I finally know that." A smile lit up Percy's face. He held out his arms.
"Hug it out?"
Nico scoffed. "Gods, Percy, I said I would listen to you, but showing PDA crosses a line. Especially since you aren't my type."
"You are going to pay for that one, di Angelo!" Percy threatened. He wrapped his arms around the son of Hades.
"Holy mother of Zeus, Jackson, let me go!" Nico demanded, squirming around. Percy had lifted him so his feet weren't touching the ground. "You are choking the life out of me. My soul is half-way to the Underworld."
Percy released his grip and set Nico back down, but was waiting for Nico to hug him back. Nico was already one step ahead. He kicked some sand into Percy's face. Percy backed away, blinking.
"Geez, Nico! Bring it on!" He raised his arms. Nico turned around with dread to see a wave towering over him.
"Shit-" the son of Hades was doused in ocean water. He shook his hair out, spluttering. "I hate you."
"Think fast." He grabbed a towel that had been left behind on a rock. Nico caught it and toweled his hair and face off.
Percy's POV:
Percy laughed loudly as he watched the water drip off Nico's clothes. "Hey, you should be thanking me. You won't have to shower today."
"Fuck off, Jackson." He started trudging up the sand dunes just as the Demeter cabin was approaching from a distance away.
"What's on the agenda for the Hades cabin today, Mr. Head Counselor? Would you like to duel the Poseidon cabin?" Percy asked.
"I have and can beat your ass, Jackson. In dueling and even on…" his statement was cut off.
He looked up to see Nico swaying, his eyes rolling in the back of his head. Even with his godly reflexes, Percy wasn't fast enough to catch the son of Hades before he fell backward into the sand.
"Oh my gods, Nico!" He lunged over, dropping to his knees in the sand. He felt for a pulse. It was slow and steady. He looked wildly around. "Hey!" he screamed at the Demeter cabin. They looked up. "Go get Will Solace!"
The senior counselors picked up on what was happening after seeing Nico's comatose body. They sent some younger campers to look for the son of Apollo. Percy looked back down to Nico. He had had no reason to pass out. He had ambrosia for his injuries. And the injuries that he did have shouldn't have caused him to pass out. Unless, Nico had cut himself last night. Percy pushed up his sleeves, but there were no cuts on his wrists. Percy wished he had more ambrosia to give to Nico, but he also didn't want the head healer chopping off his head for incinerating his boyfriend.
Percy was saved from making a decision by the arrival of Will Solace. He came sprinting over to Nico and Percy. He fell to his knees on the other side of Nico and started pulling out supplies from his bag.
"Percy, what the hell happened?" Will was fumbling. He was terrified that Nico was hurt. "Why is he all wet?"
"We were talking- I doused him with water- I don't know what happened! Did I hurt him?" Percy anxiously asked.
"No, this wasn't you." Will shined a light into his boyfriend's eyes. Will sat back on his haunches, looking quizzically at Nico. "He's asleep."
"Excuse me?" Percy asked, surprised.
Will looked up at Percy, amused. "He's asleep, not unconscious. It was like he was just too exhausted to do anything else and he just collapsed, asleep!"
"But, why? Has he ever done this before?"
Will shook his head. "Not to my knowledge. I have no idea what's going on."
"I can help with that." Both Percy and Will looked up to see who had spoken. They finally noticed the small crowd that had gathered around them. Clovis had been the one to speak up.
"Clovis? What are you doing out of your cabin?" Percy questioned.
"I had a dream that brought me here. I know why he passed out." Clovis claimed. The Demeter cabin dispersed, giving the boys some space.
"Okay, I'll bite. Why?" Will said.
"He was interfering in the dream world. He was using hypnokinesis. He was controlling dreams again." Clovis revealed. He started to fall asleep. Percy caught him, shaking him awake.
Will rubbed his forehead. "He shouldn't have tried to do that. His body wasn't ready to handle it. He needs to train before trying that again. Whose dream was he trying to control? His own?"
"He was trying to control mine," Percy piped as he set Clovis on the ground. Will looked up to Percy in confusion. "Long story short, I was having a nightmare and Nico came into to my cabin after hearing me call out. He entered into my dreams and got me out of my nightmare."
Will had started to look over Nico. "Why does he have bruises on his back and arm?"
"I accidentally judo-flipped him over a piece of armor." Percy mentioned.
Will looked stunned. "How does one go about accidentally judo-flipping people?"
"I was defending myself! I thought he was attacking me." Percy defended. "Anyway, after he woke me up, we started walking around the camp. We talked about my nightmare."
"He talked to you about Tartarus?" The son of Apollo sounded dismayed. Percy felt a stab of regret go through him. He didn't mean to hurt Will.
"I talked about my experiences and he just listened. He gave some advice, but didn't recount his experiences." Percy corrected.
"I guess I'm just surprised he talked about it at all. He usually does everything in his power to avoid discussion about it."
"Will, you have to… Tartarus… you can never truly understand the hardships and challenges he went through. That place almost drove him insane." Percy lamented.
All of a sudden, Clovis sat up quickly, causing Will and Percy to jump. "That's true. When I tried to get him out of nightmares, I saw the things that he saw. Even I had nightmares for weeks, and I only saw it for a couple of seconds." He fell back asleep.
Will hit the sand in frustration. "I just want to help him. I know that I told him that I will back off, and I will, but I want to be there for him as well. He doesn't have to face it alone."
"I hate to say this, but maybe that's exactly what he needs." Percy said. "He shouldn't have to, but he went through Tartarus alone. He has to learn to accept it alone as well."
Will sighed. "You're right. It's just difficult. I want to be able to understand."
Percy's eyes widened. "No, you don't. You have no idea how wonderful ignorance is. Especially about Tartarus. Trust me. You have to let him heal on his own and on his own time."
"Okay, okay. But, there must be something I can do? His nightmares are so bad that they interfere with his sleeping schedule. And he refuses to take sleeping draughts so unless I tip some over his evening drink…" Will suggested. Percy laughed.
"Poisoning your boyfriend? That will get you far." He paused. "With Annabeth and I, just being in the same room makes a world of difference. But, Nico is a different story. He had no one with him in Tartarus. I don't know how he can deal with his dreams."
Clovis woke again. "I can help with that too." His eyes opened. "When Nico was transporting the statute to camp, he passed through my dreamscape. Even in the past couple of months, he passed through without realizing it. He used to be able to control his dreams very easily. But, because he was so hurt and almost faded away, he lost the ability. Today, we know that he gained it back. At a cost. It exhausted him. He needs to retrain himself to learn how to control them. The reason he lost the ability is because he is dealing with so much PTSD, after repressing everything for so long. This is the aftermath."
"If he was getting so bad, why didn't you say anything?" Will put up his hand.
Clovis shrugged. "This is the first time I have remembered." His eyes fluttered shut.
Will sighed. "If he is exhausted, I am going to take the Lord of Darkness to catch up on his sleep." He stood up. He bent back down, picking up Nico. He threw him over his shoulder in a fireman's carry. "Thanks for your help, Percy."
"Anytime." Percy raised his hand in farewell.
He watched as the two boys disappeared over the ridge, towards Cabin 13. As he sat on the beach, Percy wondered the strange sight they would be. Son of Hades draped unconscious on his boyfriend's back. But, at this point, people probably got freaked out when they didn't see Nico unconscious.
Percy chuckled, turning towards Clovis, who was face down in the sand, snoring. He gently rolled Clovis over, so he wouldn't suffocate.
"Clovis," he said. "It's probably time for you to get back to your cabin."
Clovis merely yawned in response, making Percy yawn as well. Clovis opened his bleary eyes. "I'm just so comfortable. You can leave me here. Just open my backpack. I have a pillow and blanket in there."
Percy shook his head as he extracted the items. He handed them to Clovis, who turned over and continued snoring. Percy stood, heading to the dining pavilion. On his way, he ran into Annabeth.
"Annabeth, my darling!" He planted a kiss on her cheek.
"Yes, hello." She seemed distracted, peeking over the sand dunes. "What were you doing on the beach?"
He smiled. "I was talking to Nico. I had a nightmare and he helped me."
Her eyes lit up. "That's great! But, what did you do to him? Why did I see Will carrying him? And is that Clovis sleeping on the beach? What's going on?"
Percy kissed her on the lips, effectively shutting her up. "You ask too many questions too early in the morning. Let's go get breakfast, and I will tell you everything, okay?"
"But, you can't leave Clovis on the beach! It's the middle of the winter! He could be washed out to sea or stampeded."
"He asked me to leave him?" The statement came out more as a question. Annabeth shook her head and took his hand, leading him back to the beach.
"I swear to the gods, Percy. I don't know what you would do without me. I am 98% of your impulse control."
Percy smiled as she led him along. Yes, she is.