(Honeygrove Memorial Hospital: Intensive Care Unit)
After leaving Brooke's room, Peyton had left the hospital building and sat outside in the fresh air. For the past thirty minutes, Peyton had been lost in thought, contemplating what could possibly have possessed her to even consider asking Brooke what she'd been about to.
Eventually Peyton had come to the conclusion that being confined inside for so long was finally starting to get to her, after all what else could explain the sudden desire she'd had to say what she'd wanted.
As she sat outside now, Peyton felt awful. All she could keep thinking about was the pleading look Brooke had given her before she'd left, before she'd turned her back on her. What had she been thinking? Fair enough, she'd managed to stop herself from possibly making a huge mistake, but did she really need to abandon Brooke like she had? Peyton didn't think so.
For the last ten minutes Peyton had wanted more than anything to go back upstairs and make sure Brooke was ok, but something inside Peyton wouldn't let her. Fear.
What if Brooke was upset with her for leaving like she had? Since she'd woken up Brooke hadn't asked much of Peyton, in fact, all she'd asked is that Peyton stay with her. However, even that was only after Peyton had insisted on staying with Brooke when the others returned home.
Yet, here Peyton was, sitting alone outside the hospital as the evening drew in around her, failing once again to do the only thing that Brooke needed her to. Peyton wondered how she could be finding something so easy as just being around Brooke, so difficult.
Her and Brooke had been friends for ten years. They were comfortable around each other, never struggling to start a conversation because they just began naturally. So why was being around Brooke suddenly so hard for Peyton?
It's because Brooke could die, Peyton thought to herself.
Peyton shook her head from side to side in an attempt to rid that sudden insight. Brooke wasn't going to die, at least not any time soon Peyton hoped. Besides, she'd known about Brooke's cancer since yesterday, so why was it only now becoming such an issue?
Because now it's more real, Peyton thought.
Peyton shook her head once again, trying to stop her mind from continuing to wander down this track. However, as hard as Peyton tried, she couldn't because it was true.
Since Peyton had found out about the cancer following prom, Brooke had her struggles, but mostly she continued to be the same person that she has always been. Energetic. Impulsive. Witty.
As she thought about it now a startling realisation hit Peyton and she found it upsetting. If it had been anyone else upstairs, Peyton wouldn't be finding this so difficult because she'd know that once they were discharged that would be the end of it. That on leaving the hospital, they'd be able to move on with their life. However, for Brooke this wasn't the case. Once she left here she'd just move onto the next hospital, the next treatment in her fight for life.
Peyton finally understood what Brooke had been trying to explain to her earlier. Why she'd been so eager to leave the hospital and return home to Tree Hill. Brooke had only stayed because she knew that Peyton wanted her to, not because that's what she'd wanted for herself.
As she thought about this, Peyton couldn't help but feel a sudden surge of guilt. Perhaps there was something that she could do for Brooke once she was discharged to make up for it?
Suddenly without warning Peyton remembered one of her drawings.
People always leave.
When Brooke had told Peyton about her cancer she'd promised her that she wasn't going anywhere without a fight, that she'd do whatever she could to beat this. Brooke had promised Peyton that she wouldn't leave her.
As she recalled this Peyton stood from where she'd been sitting and made her way back into the hospital building. Brooke had made Peyton a promise, but in return Peyton had promised her that she wouldn't have to do this alone, that they'd do it together.
Peyton kicked herself inside as she made her way back towards Brooke's room. How could she have just left Brooke like that when she'd clearly wanted her to stay?
So much for promises, Peyton thought. This shouldn't be hard. In fact, Brooke had made this incredibly easy for everyone by continuing to be herself. The only person that was making this difficult for Peyton was herself.
She was the one who was over thinking things, who was focusing on what the future might hold instead of facing the present. She'd promised herself yesterday that she'd seize each day that she'd make the most of it. That she'd stop worrying about what might happen tomorrow.
Brooke wasn't, so why should she? Of course Brooke was scared about what the future could hold for her, she'd even admitted as much to Peyton.
"I guess what it all comes down to is that I'm scared Peyton." Brooke confessed. "It just seems like my whole life is slipping away from me and no matter how much I try to hold onto it, I can't… and if that's the case, then I want to enjoy as much of it as I can… whilst I can. I don't want to be stuck in a hospital, missing out on spending time with my friends and the people that I care about…"
The difference was that Brooke wasn't obsessing over it. She knew the possibilities but she'd face them when the time came, until then she just wanted to enjoy her life and continue to do the things that she normally does.
In that moment Peyton realised that she needed to follow Brooke's example. For the last thirty minutes she'd been sitting outside worrying about how Brooke would react to her leaving, worrying about Brooke and that she might lose her. However, what had she really achieved from it? Nothing.
As she realised this Peyton thought about what she'd missed whilst she'd been brooding outside and was surprised to find it was more than she gained.
When Peyton reached the door to Brooke's room, she paused outside momentarily to compose herself, her hand resting gently on the handle. After a minute, Peyton turned the handle slowly and opened the door as she entered the room.
Peyton was shocked to see Brooke sitting on the edge of her bed, an oxygen mask covering her face as she attempted to stand up from her current position. On noticing Peyton standing mouth agape at the doorway, Brooke looked towards her and spoke.
"P. Sawyer," Brooke said, her voice raspy from where she'd been intubated. "You're back."
"Brooke?" Peyton asked stepping into the room and closing the door, obviously still stunned.
"Yeah?" Brooke asked as she attempted to stand up from where she was sitting.
For a moment, Peyton stared at her in silence, confusion registering on her face. When she didn't say anything Brooke decided to continue.
"You know," Brooke said finally standing up and looking at Peyton. "It's not very fair to run out of the room during the middle of a conversation…especially when I can't shout after you because I have a stupid tube down my throat."
"I'm sorry," Peyton, said, her mind still struggling to take in the scene before her.
Peyton watched Brooke for a moment as she attempted to reach over to the chair positioned beside her bed with one hand.
"What are you doing?" Peyton managed to ask as her mind finally caught up with her eyes.
"Well," Brooke began matter of factly, still reaching for the chair. "I stopped being able to feel my ass about an hour ago so I'm getting out of bed for a bit."
Brooke paused for a moment before adding as an after thought, "In fact, now you're back, can you please help me?"
At Brooke's words Peyton sprung into action, darting across the room to take the hand that Brooke was offering to her.
"Oh God, I'm so sorry, of course I will, here" Peyton said as she wrapped Brooke's arm around her shoulders and led her towards the chair.
Peyton helped Brooke as she slowly lowered herself into the chair and sat down.
"Thanks," Brooke said once she was seated. "I was starting to worry that that if I stayed in bed any longer there'd be a permanent indentation of my ass in the mattress."
Peyton laughed as she stood leaning against the edge of Brooke's bed, watching her friend sit before her.
"Rightly so," Peyton said still laughing. "I mean, they'd probably lose a couple of patients in it once you've gone because it's so big."
"Hey," Brooke protested as she pointed towards Peyton and smiled. "You're starting to sound like Rachel."
"Rachel?" Peyton asked raising her eyebrow questioningly.
"Yeah," Brooke answered. "Rachel told me I had a huge ass too. She said I should see if they'll fix it for free when I have my operation on Wednesday."
Peyton seemed to consider it for a moment, watching Brooke closely and making a point of trying to get a glimpse of her butt.
"Maybe you should consider it," Peyton said jokingly causing Brooke to lean forward and hit her playfully on the arm.
"Shut up." she said laughing. "Where've you been anyway?"
"I just needed to clear my head," Peyton answered honestly. "You know, get some fresh air."
"Really?" Brooke asked, a grin spreading across her face. "I didn't think there was much in there to begin with?"
Peyton laughed good naturedly before next speaking.
"Does Dr. Stevens know you're out of bed?" Peyton asked her, watching Brooke closely for a response.
"Of course," Brooke lied, knowing that Peyton had easily seen through it by the look that suddenly appeared across her face.
"Brooke?" Peyton asked smiling.
Brooke sighed before answering.
"Ok, so he doesn't know." Brooke answered. "But I don't see what the big deal is, I mean if I can go home tomorrow why can't I sit out of bed?"
"Wait," Peyton said realising what Brooke had just said. "I thought he wouldn't let you leave until Tuesday?"
"Well," Brooke started tentatively. "I kind of convinced him to let me leave tomorrow morning instead…"
"You convinced him?" Peyton asked quietly.
"On the condition that he's happy for me to leave when he checks me in the morning." Brooke added knowing Peyton would be worried if she thought that she was being discharged before she was ready. "I know that you think I should stay, but Peyton it is seriously boring in here and…"
"Ok," Peyton interrupted her.
Brooke looked at Peyton hesitantly.
"Ok?" Brooke asked her puzzled. "So…you're not upset?"
"Of course not," Peyton said smiling. "The sooner we get out of here, the sooner we can sit in front of the TV all day binging on junk food. What's not to love about that?"
"Please don't mention food," Brooke said rubbing her stomach. "I haven't managed to eat anything since yesterday and I'm starving."
"You want me to get you something from the cafeteria?" Peyton asked her.
"The cafeteria?" Brooke asked making a disgusted face. "I think I'll pass."
"That's probably a good call." Peyton answered smiling.
For a moment the two of them sat in a comfortable silence, Brooke resting in the chair whilst Peyton rested on the edge of Brooke's bed.
"What were you going to ask me earlier?" Brooke asked after another minute had passed.
"Uh…it's was nothing really." Peyton answered avoiding Brooke's gaze.
"Peyton it didn't seem like nothing," Brooke disagreed. "I mean you said it wasn't anything bad, but if that's true then why won't you tell me?"
"Honestly Brooke, it's not important," Peyton answered. "It can wait."
Brooke watched Peyton closely for a moment as she continued to glance at the floor in front of her. Brooke knew that Peyton was lying to her, but she wasn't going to pull her up on it now, instead choosing to change the subject.
"I think I want to have pinese tomorrow." Brooke said as though thinking deeply.
"Pinese?" Peyton asked glad for the sudden change of topic.
"Yeah," Brooke said smiling. "Pizza and Chinese. Pinese."
"Brooke you'll never be able to eat them both at the same time," Peyton said laughing.
"Of course I will," Brooke said standing from her chair.
On seeing Brooke stand Peyton leant forward to help her.
"Remember that time I devoured two whole chocolate cakes?" Brooke continued as she rested against Peyton for balance.
Brooke began to make her way slowly over to the bed with Peyton.
"How could I forget?" Peyton asked laughing. "You're mom was so pissed at you because they were supposed to be the desserts for her dinner guests."
"I think I ended up spending the whole week hiding out at your house after that." Brooke remembered.
When they reached the bed Brooke was about to sit down on the edge of it, however, before she could Peyton pulled her into a warm embrace, holding her tightly in her arms.
For an instant Brooke was stunned but once she realised what was happening she hugged Peyton back, watching her closely as she did, a confused expression on her face.
(Tree Hill: River Court)
For a moment, Abby and Lucas stood looking at each other in silence, neither of them quite believing that they were actually standing in front of the other.
It was Mouth that eventually broke the quiet between them.
"I'll…uh…I'll leave you two alone for a while." Mouth said as he glanced between the two of them and began walking back across the river court to the street.
Lucas turned to call to him as he left.
"Hey Mouth," Lucas said causing Mouth to turn back around to face him. "Thanks."
A small smile crept across Mouth's face and Lucas returned it.
"Call me when you're ready for me," Mouth said smiling.
"I will." Lucas answered nodding his head.
Mouth threw one last glance towards Abby before turning around and making his way back towards the street away from the two of them.
Once Mouth had disappeared, Lucas turned back to face Abby, watching her as she stared at him questioningly.
Lucas sighed heavily before finally speaking. Ever since he'd discovered it had been Dan that'd killed Keith he'd been eager to speak to Abby, however, now that he was actually standing before her, his mind had gone blank.
Lucas had so many questions that he was having difficulty picking only one to ask. Eventually he decided to start small.
"Do you know who I am?" he asked Abby as he took the seat beside her on the picnic table.
Abby nodded in response to his question.
"Lucas Scott." Abby replied. "Mouth told me that you know…. that…"
"That my father killed my uncle?" Lucas finished for her.
"Yes." She said quietly, still meeting his gaze firmly.
Lucas exhaled deeply on hearing this. Of course he'd already overhead Abby accuse Dan of killing Keith, but her confirming it in person now still came as a shock to him.
Abby watched Lucas closely, allowing him time to ask the questions that he needed answering.
After a moment of silence Lucas finally managed to ask. "How do you know Abby?"
Lucas paused momentarily before repeating the question once more. "How do you know it was Dan that killed Keith?"
"I saw him," Abby answered averting her gaze from the scrutiny of Lucas'. "I was in one of the classrooms when I heard Jimmy talking to you in the corridor outside."
"Talking to me?" Lucas asked confused.
"You had Peyton in your arms and Jimmy was standing before, his gun pointing straight at the two of you." Abby swallowed hard before continuing. "Then your uncle came in…. he stood in front of both of you…protecting you…"
"He told me to leave." Lucas agreed remembering the last time he'd ever seen Keith alive. At the memory Lucas felt tears forming in his eyes.
"And you did," Abby continued noticing his sad expression. "But he stayed to talk to Jimmy…. he tried to help him Lucas…tried to get Jimmy to give him the gun…he wouldn't leave him…he wouldn't leave him alone."
Lucas wiped his eyes roughly as Abby continued.
"Your uncle tried to make Jimmy see that it would get better…that the pain he was feeling would go away…" Abby said quietly.
"But he couldn't help him," Lucas asked feeling more tears falling.
"No," Abby said almost inaudibly. "The only person that could help Jimmy was himself…but he chose not to…Jimmy was so blinded by his own pain that he couldn't see past his grief…he couldn't see a future Lucas…he didn't want to."
"So he shot himself?" Lucas asked her as sudden memories of Jimmy came flooding back.
As he sat there Lucas remembered how Jimmy had sat in almost the exact place he was sitting now, commentating along with Mouth as they watched him play basketball with the rest of the guys from the river court.
"Your uncle tried to stop him, but it was too late," Abby continued as her voice broke and she felt tears form in her own eyes at the memory.
She watched Lucas as he stared out at the river court before him and reached up to wipe his eyes once again. "It was…it was just too late."
Lucas turned back towards Abby on hearing her pause, his tears glistening in the moonlight. When Lucas didn't say anything Abby continued.
"Your uncle… Keith... He was leant over Jimmy on the floor when your father walked up to him." Abby said shaking her head and crying at the memory. "Dan…he bent down and picked up Jimmy's gun from the floor…Keith…Keith was crying…he told Dan that Jimmy was gone…"
Abby's voice trailed off as she tried to compose herself.
"Then what happened?" Lucas asked her, emotion thick in his voice. "Abby what happened next?" he repeated softly.
"Dan…" Abby managed to say to Lucas. "He lifted the gun in his hand…. aimed it…aimed it at Keith."
Abby exhaled deeply and wiped at her own eyes.
"Keith stood up…he looked…shocked…hurt." Abby said watching Lucas as he closed his eyes once more and more tears fell from his eyes. "Then…" Abby continued almost inaudibly. "Then Dan shot him."
Lucas had known that it wouldn't be easy to listen to Abby relay the events of that day back to him in all their detail but he'd definitely not been expecting to feel as he did now. Listening to Abby discuss the circumstances of Keith's shooting was painful, almost as though Lucas was relieving the day over again, experiencing the loss as though it had only just happened.
"I'm sorry," Abby said regretfully. "I'm so sorry…"
Lucas opened his eyes and turned to face Abby. He took her hand in her appreciatively.
"Thank you," he managed after a moment. "Thank you for telling me the truth."
Abby looked at Lucas closely as he wiped at his eyes, a sudden resolve coming over him as he tried to force the feelings that had resurfaced back to where they'd come from.
"Jimmy…" Abby started sadly. "He regretted it…bringing in the gun to school…I could see it…at the end… I could see it."
Lucas nodded swallowing hard.
"Jimmy didn't mean to hurt anyone…he was a good person deep down…he let me go…he did the right thing…he made a mistake…" Abby continued.
"And now he'll be remembered as a monster," Lucas interrupted her.
Lucas saw a tear roll down Abby's cheek as she nodded, her eyes closed.
"He was just…scared…just scared." She said sadly. "Dan's a monster…not Jimmy…when he shot your uncle…he was cold…uncaring…there was no hesitation…no regret…nothing."
"I need you to help me," Lucas said looking at Abby closely. "I need you to help me bring Dan down, to clear Jimmy's name…"
"Mouth told me your plan," Abby said wiping her eyes. "I'll whatever you need me to…"
Lucas nodded gratefully, a sad smile creeping onto his face.
"Thank you," he said quietly before standing up from his seat on the picnic table.
Lucas stood before Abby looking down at her closely before asking her, "What are you doing tonight?"
Abby gave Lucas a questioning look as he held out his hand to help her stand from the bench, the same look of resolve crossing his face that she'd seen only a few moments ago.