Chapter 14

I got to Nashville around noon on Friday and at twelve thirty I was pulling down that long gravel drive, entering the code and pulling up at Luke and Caroline's house. When I got to the house Luke was outside waiting on me while the boys played on the big wooden swing set.

"Hey Bailey," Luke said hugging me. "Caro is in the shower so give her about another hour." He laughed.

"Are you trying to say that women take too long to get ready," I asked with my hands on my hips.

"Absolutely." He laughed again and so did I. "Seriously though, I'm glad you came up. It's good to see you again."

"Thank you guys for inviting me up. I've missed this town."

"Caroline mentioned that you were having music city withdrawals. Bailey you're welcome up here anytime, you don't need a reason, just come on." He smiled that bright white smile of his and turned toward where the boys were playing. "Bobo! Taterbug! Look who finally made it!"

"Bailey," they squealed in unison as they ran my way.

"I'll get your bag and take it on in. You're about to have your hands full," he smirked.

I kneeled down smiling as the boys ran right to my arms. "Hi there you two! Man I missed y'all." I hugged them both close and realized that it wasn't just this town I'd been missing, it was the people I called friends now too.

"We missed you to Baywee," Tate grinned.

"Yeah, it sucks you got to live so far away," Bo said.

"Luke's influence," I heard Caroline say behind me.

I stood and turned to her. "Hey you!" She

She hugged me and smiled. "You've got to get up here more often. This month and half crap is unacceptable."

"I know. I will."

She nodded and smiled before turning to the boys. "Hey you two guys, nap time. Let's go." She clapped her hands for emphasis and pointed to the house.

"But mommy, Bailey just got here!"

"Awe, Bobo, I'll be here this whole weekend. I promise."

"Really!" His sweet little face lit up as I nodded and he fist pumped the air. "So awesome! Hey can you come with mommy to tuck us in for nap?"

I looked to Caroline and had to fight off a smile. "Can I mommy?"

"If you don't they will never go to sleep."

"I think that's a yes boys!" Tate came up to me sucking on his thumb, his free hand stretched out for me to pick him up. I scooped him up and sat him on my hip. His head found my shoulder and he snuggled there as I followed Caroline inside and up the stairs to the boy's room.

Ten minutes later I had a beer in my hand, she had her wine, and we were out on the back patio. The view still stole my breath. It was beautiful even though the leaves had gone from the trees, leaving them bare and exposed. There was an old John Deere sitting up between the barn and the pond. Luke was up there stacking wood and brush getting a decent pile ready to be lit up in a few hours. The starkness of the bare trees made the red of the barn and the green of the tractor stand out even brighter against the blue, cloudless sky that day.

"So has anything changed back home for you? I mean, with the way that you've been feeling?"

I took a long sip of my beer and sat it down. "Not at all, unfortunately. It's like its worse the longer I'm there."

"I'm sorry Bailey, I really am. How do you feel now, being away from what's always been home?"

"Honestly, I feel at home. It's like all that baggage just fell off my shoulders when I crossed the state line. I feel like I'm living again already. Like I can breathe easier."

"Yep! This town has sucked you right on in."

I nodded absently and then let myself be sucked into a silent train of thought as I sipped my beer. It was crazy to me how all of the negative and bad emotion really had slipped away from me as I'd crossed the state line and drove right on into the city. I hadn't even realize that it had all disappeared until I'd said the words aloud. Would I ever feel the way that I do here at home again? I had to hope so, at least once the newness of Nashville had worn off and I wasn't in awe of the beauty of the outskirts of the lights and noise, when I didn't long to lose myself in those lights and that noise. I was beginning to think that no matter how bad I wanted to believe that, it wouldn't be happening.

Draining the beer in my bottle I stood. "I think I'm gonna run inside and grab another beer. I need to call Brantley too."

"Its fine girl, go on. Take your time."

In the kitchen I opened up the refrigerator and pulled out another beer. I was popping the lid off with one hand and dialing Brantley with the other. He answered on the third ring.

"Hey Bay! I was starting to get worried about you. Did you make it to Luke's alright?"

"I sure did, been about a half an hour I guess. I'm sorry I forgot to text or call. The boys were far too excited to give me the chance."

"It's fine darlin, really. So, how do you feel being back in that town?

I knew what he was really asking. "Honestly? I feel like I'm home again, like I'm living."

He was silent a minute to long for my liking before he said, "I have never seen myself moving there, and I still can't. I guess I love our little hometown a little too much."

I took a long swallow of the ice cold Coors Light in my hand before I spoke. I took in all that was said, spoken and unspoken. He'd said a mouthful. "Well, now wouldn't work be easier, with you getting bigger in the industry and all, if you lived up this way?"

"Well yeah, maybe so, but I know I'd be so unhappy that it wouldn't be good for writing, or anything else for that matter. I guess I'll just rack up those sky miles." He paused and then he said, "You sound like you're thinking you'd like to call that city home."

"What? Brantley I never said that. I just… I don't know, I never mentioned moving anywhere."

"Okay baby, I miss you. I got to run though. Radio spot to do. I'll call or text you when I can. I love you." He hung up before I could get out I love you to.

"Yeah, love you too babe," I muttered as I sat the cell phone down and brought the cold beer to my lips.

"Problems in love Bay," Luke said from the doorway. I faced him and he held his hands up in surrender. "I wasn't listening in or anything, I swear. But I came in to get one of those beers and before I could walk out I guess I heard too much. I'm sorry. Just know I'm here if you want to talk."

"It's fine, really Luke. It's just, everyone at home thinks I want to move here or something. It'd be different if I'd mentioned it but I haven't. Not even once."

Leaning on his elbows on the high bar he said, "Okay, so don't move here. Make them all eat their words and prove em all wrong. But Bay, would it be so bad, living here, for you?"

"Well, no, but, Luke everything that I know is in Jefferson. My friends, job, house… it's all there."

"Tell me something, all that crap that was hounding you, those feelings, back in Jefferson, is it with you now? Is it still hounding you here? Are you still feeling it?"

I slowly shook my head no. "No, no it's all gone. It's like it just disappeared."

"Darlin if you think long and hard you're gonna see that you know what those feelings mean. The whole moving issue, all of that, you've got the answer to it already, you're just smothering it. I just wonder how long till you stop trying to kill it and let it out to breathe."

"Yeah, um, this serious you, I don't like it right now."

He laughed and stuck his tongue out at me. "Better?"

"Yes you damn dork," I said laughing.