For a while nothing was said and they just ate. Brittany was sure this was the most awkward dinner she had ever had. "I ruined it, didn't I?"
"Ruined what?" Santana asked poking her enchilada.
"Our friendship," Brittany said softly, "I ruined it by kissing you."
Santana put her fork down and looked at Brittany. She looked so sad and Santana was sure she saw tears welling up in her eyes. "No. No, you didn't."
"Yes, I did," Brittany said, "I was…."
"Please don't say you were drunk again," Santana groaned, "I just…I don't want to hear that excuse anymore."
"It's not an excuse," Brittany insisted, "I was drunk, but I knew what I was doing. I wanted to kiss you and I thought that I could just blame it on the alcohol and you wouldn't be mad."
All Santana could seem to concentrate on was that Brittany had said, she wanted to kiss her. "Why…why would I be mad?"
"Why?" Brittany asked confused, "Because I totally violated your personal space and stuff. And I'm sure you don't have your friends just randomly kiss you."
"No, I don't," Santana said with a small chuckle, "I'd probably punch them in the face."
"See!" Brittany said, "I didn't want you to punch me in the face!"
Santana's chuckle turned into a laugh, "I would never punch you in the face Britt. Especially for kissing me." She cleared her throat before asking the next question. "Why did you want to kiss me?"
Brittany took a deep breath and leaned back, "I guess, I just wanted to…I told you that I had a crush on you..."
Santana nodded.
"…I guess I wanted to see what it was like to kiss you." Brittany said and looked down at her taco plate.
Santana swallowed, "And?"
"It was nice."
"Nice?" Santana asked, somewhat disappointed, "Just…nice?"
"Yeah," Brittany said looking up, "It was nice."
"I would have thought you'd say amazing or phenomenal," Santana teased, "But nice? That's not great for my self esteem."
Brittany tried not to smile but couldn't stop herself. "Maybe more than nice."
"That's a little better," Santana said.
"So, we're OK?" Brittany asked.
"We're fine," Santana said with a smile.
"I don't want you to think I'm like those other girls at the club," Brittany said, "All those endless women you said were hitting on you."
"I may have exaggerated that a little."
"Oh, I know," Brittany said with a small laugh, "But I love being your friend, Santana. I never in a million years thought you'd even be talking to me. And I'm scared you'll stop being my friend."
"Hey," Santana said reaching across the table and grabbed Brittany's hand, "I'm not going anywhere. Yeah, that kiss threw a wrench in our friendship, but it wasn't a bad wrench."
"No?"
"No," Santana confirmed. She gave Brittany's hand a light squeeze and had to stop herself from interlocking their fingers. Her skin was just so soft.
Brittany felt like the world had been lifted from her shoulders. She wasn't losing Santana. "I promise I won't kiss you again."
"Well, let's not get crazy now," Santana said letting go of Brittany's hand, "What about next time we get drunk?"
Brittany was sure she blushed. "We can't be drunk and in secret rooms."
"Sure we can." Santana couldn't stop the flirtatious tone in her voice. "We can…"
Brittany phone rang.
"Sorry," Brittany said taking the phone out of her and looking at the screen. It was Quinn. She silenced the phone and put it back in her pocket.
"Was that Mercedes?" Santana asked, secretly hoping it was.
Brittany shook her head, "It was Quinn. I'll just call her later."
Santana's flirty mood was gone. "You said something last night, about Quinn. Do you remember that?"
"Yeah," Brittany said softly.
"So it's true? She asked you to be her…uh…her girlfriend?" Santana asked gripping her fork tighter than necessary.
"No, not really," Brittany said, "She just said she liked me."
"And you like her?"
"I do," Brittany admitted, "It's kinda complicated."
"Well, when you go around kissing other girls, I'm sure it is," Santana said dropping her fork.
Brittany hated feeling like this. Feeling so confused and conflicted. She was about to apologize again for kissing her but then remembered that Santana kissed her back. "Why did you kiss me back? You could have just pushed me away but you kissed me back. Twice. And I think you even tried to pull my dress up."
Santana fidgeted in her seat. "I told you, hot girl kisses me, I kiss back."
"Oh," Brittany said, sadly. She shrugged her shoulders, "Well, I'm glad to hear I don't repulse you or anything."
Santana took a deep breath knowing that wasn't the reason at all. If this had been any other girl, Santana was certain she would have already slept with her and had her wrapped around her little figure. But this wasn't one of those random girls that would hit on her. Brittany wasn't one of those girls that Santana could forget about the next day or week. Brittany scared her.
"I…," Santana began, "I li…forget it."
"So," Brittany began desperately wanting to change the subject, "Do you have any brothers or sisters?"
"What?" Santana asked snapping out of her thoughts.
"I told you yesterday I had a sister," Brittany said, "What about you?"
"Oh, uh, an older brother," Santana said, "He's a doctor, like my dad, and he's doing his residency over at Angles Hospital where my dad works."
"Oh cool!" Brittany said, impressed, "That's awesome that you have two doctors in the family. I bet you get tons of free band-aids."
Santana couldn't help but laugh, "It has it's perks."
For the rest of the dinner they swapped war stories about their siblings. How Brittany's sister glued her bedroom door shut once, how Santana's brother pretended to abandon her at the mall. Talk about kisses pushed to the back of their minds.
By the time they stepped out of the restaurant and walked out to the parking lot, it was dark. The lot was full of cars but not a person in sight.
"You should come to New York," Brittany said as they walked, "Sometime in the summer, you should come visit."
"Really?"
"Sure," Brittany said, "And Kurt too."
"That sounds like a good idea," Santana said with a smile.
"Here we go," Brittany said turning off the alarm and unlocking the doors. She opened the back door on the driver's side and put her purse inside and was surprised when Santana got into the back seat and closed the door.
"What are you doing?" Brittany asked, "You want to play taxi or something."
"Get inside," Santana demanded softly. She couldn't let Brittany keep thinking she only kissed her because she was hot. She needed to tell Brittany she liked her more than just a friend even if it meant rejection, which she was expecting. Brittany had said she had a thing for Quinn, but there was a time when Brittany had a crush on her, Santana, and maybe, just maybe…
Brittany slowly got in the backseat and closed the door. Santana just sat there looking at her hands that were on her lap. "Why are we sitting back here?"
"What I told Kurt was true," Santana said, still looking at her hands, "I don't want a relationship or a girlfriend. I suck at relationships. I'm pretty sure I'm not meant to be in one."
"Umm, OK," Brittany said, confused.
"I didn't kiss you back just because you're hot," Santana said before she lost her nerve. "I kissed you because I wanted to."
"Because you were drunk?" Brittany asked.
"No," Santana said, "I wasn't drunk. Well, not as much. I... I like you. That's why I kissed you back." Santana let out a long breath and looked at Brittany.
"I know you like me," Brittany said, "Otherwise you wouldn't be my friend."
"No, Britt…I… fuck it." Without a second's hesitation, Santana practically pounced on Brittany and brought their lips together.
Brittany was stunned. The last thing she expected was Santana to kiss her but that's exactly what happened. She brought her hand to Santana's face intending to push her away but instead brought Santana closer and deepened the kiss.
Santana pulled back just enough to speak, "Totally sober," she whispered.
"What…what are you doing?" Brittany asked, trying to catch her breath.
Santana smiled into Brittany's lips before kissing her again. She didn't know what came over her, but this sudden urge to kiss Brittany again over came her and she went with it. Kissing Brittany felt different. It was sweeter, hotter, and it made Santana feel like her whole body was buzzing. She had never felt anything remotely like this with anyone else. And that's why Brittany scared her, but she didn't want to think about that right now. Right now, she just wanted to feel and taste Brittany.
Brittany slid down the backseat as Santana pressed against her a little harder. This was a whole new experience now that she was completely sober. Last night felt like some sort or dream, and now it felt absolutely real. Santana kept pressing down and soon Brittany found herself laying on the back seat with Santana on top of her. Brittany was sure this was one of her Santana Fantasies. Making out with Santana Lopez in the back seat of her car was something she never would have thought would happen. The reality was a thousand times more amazing than the fantasy.
Brittany felt Santana move from her lips to her neck. Brittany moaned. Or Santana did, she couldn't tell. Their lips devoured each other and Brittany ran her hand through Santana's hair and it was quickly becoming one of her favorite things. When she felt Santana's hand travel up her thigh, she thought that maybe that was her new favorite thing.
"Ahh, Britt...," Santana moaned.
Brittany moved from kissing Santana's lips to nibbling on her neck. "I can't believe I'm making out with Santana Lopez," Brittany said with a smile.
"What?" Santana asked, moving to look at Brittany. She had heard that exact same sentence many times from the girls she had been with during her years at ULA. Girls who hooked up withe her only to be able to brag that they had made out with the resident celebrity. For the most part, Santana didn't care as long as she got her hook up, but that didn't mean she liked hearing it. Before she could think anymore about what Brittany had said she felt a tongue lick up her neck all the way up to her earlobe. "Oh God," Santana whispered, her voice dripping with lust.
A phone rang. And kept ringing.
"That's me," Brittany said detaching herself from Santana's neck.
"Shit," Santana said, trying to control her breath, "If that's Quinn again you should tell her to fuck off."
Brittany pushed Santana away from her a little, "What?"
Santana looked down at Brittany, "You should just tell her you're not interested in being with her."
"Why would I do that?"
"Why?" Santana asked, surprised. She sat up. "Maybe because you're making out with me? Again."
Brittany moved to sit up, "But I'm not sure yet."
"Not sure of what?"
Brittany let out a breath and decided to just be honest. "I like Quinn. And I like you. I like both of you."
"I know you said you liked Quinn, but that was before."
"Before what?"
"Before you and I kissed. Three times! So, just tell Quinn to back off and you and I can just keep doing this." Santana said in such a way that it sounded like it was the most logical thing in the world. She had never been anyone's second choice and she wasn't about to start being one now.
Brittany furrowed her brow trying to understand what Santana was saying. "But…I can't just stop liking Quinn all of a sudden. It's not like I can just flip a switch and stop caring about her. It doesn't work that way. Believe me, I tried that with you many times."
"Wait so, you've actively tried to stop liking me, but you won't so the same with Quinn?" Santana asked, now getting a little angry.
"It's different!" Brittany insisted. She moved further back from Santana until her back hit the door. "I've had a thing for you for two years! It sucked, Santana! Do you have any idea how awful it feels to like someone who doesn't know you exist? No. Of course you don't. You're Santana Lopez! I'm sure you have your pick of any girl in the city."
"Two years?" Santana was rarely shocked, but hearing that Brittany had had a crush on her for two years made her scoot back until she hit the back door. "Why…why, uh, didn't you ever come up to me? Asked me out or something?"
Brittany couldn't help herself. She laughed. "Seriously? Every time I happen to see you on campus, you'd be with some hot girl or girls. I went to one of those football parties with Mercedes once, and you were like some hot chick magnet. You honestly think that if I had come up to you, you would have given me the time of day?"
"I…maybe," Santana said, unsure of what to say.
"Right," Brittany said, shaking her head, "And besides I started dating Jesse, he liked me and wanted to be with me."
"That's not fair." Santana felt like she needed to defend herself, "You don't know what I would have done. Shit, I don't know what I would have done! But considering we've made out multiple times now, I probable would have given you a chance."
"Gee, thanks," Brittany said, sarcastically. She rarely got mad, but Santana was making her mad now.
Santana felt herself getting frustrated. "What do you want me to say?"
"Nothing," Brittany said, letting out a long breath, "Nothing. Let's just…I'll take you home." Brittany turned to open the car door.
"Wait!" Santana said, "So that's it? We just pretend this didn't happen?"
"You said you don't want a girlfriend…."
"I don't," Santana admitted, "I'm not…I told you I'm not good at relationships."
"…and there's Quinn…"
Santana clenched her jaw.
"I'm leaving in about a month." Brittany finished.
Santana rolled her eye, "It's not like you're moving to Japan or something. You keep talking about New York like it's some great journey across the world."
"But it is!" Brittany said, "It's not just a job…"
"Listen," Santana interrupted, "I like you. A lot. More than I've liked any of those other 'hot girls' you say you've seen me with. And you like me too! So, why not keep doing this?" She motioned between them. "Maybe even do what you said last night. You know, do this until you leave and then hit the reset button." Santana bit her lip and watched for Brittany's reaction. All she wanted was to kiss her again, but didn't want to think about what it would mean. She couldn't. Not now. Every girl she had ever been with was forgotten and there was never any type of friendship after. Santana didn't want Brittany to disappear and she knew that's what would happen if they started dating. She couldn't risk that and that's when she wondered if Brittany's suggestion may actually work.
Brittany looked at Santana and wanted nothing more than to kiss her again. But then what? They'd hook up for a month and then break up? No, Brittany thought. Everything was so complicated about being with Santana and Brittany hated that she'd end up ruining their friendship just for a month of them being together making out and…other stuff.
"I really want to kiss you again," Brittany admitted causing Santana to smile, "But I really like our friendship and I don't want to ruin that. And..."
"It won't ruin it," Santana said, scooting closer, "We could just have a different kind of friendship. A special friendship. One where we kiss and make out and…" Santana was now close enough to place a kiss on Brittany's cheek and moved her hand up to caress her other one. She turned Brittany's head and kissed her lips again. She dared to nibble on her lower lip slowly and when Brittany didn't push her away, Santana traced her tongue along Brittany's lip. She could do this all day and night.
"Santana," Brittany whimpered against the cheerleader's lips. She should stop this, but instead she grabbed Santana by the back of her neck and deepened their kiss. That small voice in her head telling her this was her last chance was back. Maybe just this one last time.
Santana grabbed the front of Brittany's shirt with her fists and pulled her down until Santana's back hit the backseat with Brittany on top of her. She could'n believe they were making out in the backseat of a car. Santana hand't done that since high school and she had forgotten how uncomfortable it was. There wasn't any room to really stretch out and that's all she wanted, to feel Brittany fully on top of her. Santana bent her leg between Brittany's legs and let the other drape over the side of the seat. Brittany seemed to have a harder time getting comfortable being that she was way taller, but somehow managed. Santana's left hand ran her hand up Brittany's thigh again and was disappointed her dinner companion had worn pants.
Brittany was sure she was drunk again. How else could she explain begin on top of Santana with her tongue in the other girl's mouth fighting for control. How else could she explain feeling Santana's hand move up her thigh and eventually land on her ass, squeezing it and kneading it and Brittany unconsciously grinding herself between Santana's legs. Everything about what was happening was too good to be true. She was so turned on she was starting to feel a little dizzy.
"Britt.." Santana moaned as she moved to take Brittany's earlobe in her mouth. She felt her underwear sticking to her as she moved her hips to keep up with Brittany's rhythm. "Britt…" She breathed into the ear near her mouth, "Let's….mmmmm, let's go back to my…my place. Or yours. Just some, somewhere with a bed."
Brittany ignored Santana's request and kissed her again and ground her hips harder against Santana causing the girl below her to let out a surprised squeal. Brittany had never really been one to take control when it came to sex, but with Santana, that Last Chance voice was taking over and she wanted to experience all she could while she had the chance. Brittany slowly moved her hand to the hem of Santana's shirt and pushed it up, never breaking their kiss. She ran her hand up along the hot bare flesh until she reached Santana's breast, causing the shorter girl to moan in Brittany's mouth.
"Britt…" Santana said, now panting, "Seriously let's…oh God…let's go back to my…my place." Santana felt her hips move faster against Brittany and knew if they didn't stop soon, she was going to lose control. She didn't want her first time with Brittany to be them dry humping in the parking lot of a Mexican restaurant. She was sure this was by far the hottest experience of her life yet. She wanted this girl like she had never wanted anyone.
Brittany ignored Santana again. She knew she had to stop soon because she was starting to feel that familiar pressure in the pit of her stomach get stronger. She just wanted to experience as much as she could before she had to stop. She couldn't have sex with Santana. Not when Brittany was still so confused about her feelings. Everything was moving too fast.
Just then, they heard muffled voices coming from outside. It sounded like two guys.
"...Man, I'm making some mad tips today," one said.
"Told you this gig would pay," the other one said.
Santana and Brittany froze. It sounded like the guys working at the valet station.
"Shit," Santana whispered.
The two valets kept talking for a couple of minutes before they left. After they were sure the valets were gone, Santana and Brittany separated and sat back up.
"Wow," Brittany said, running her hands through her hair, "Did we almost get caught making out in the backseat of my car?"
"Almost," Santana said smiling, "Which was actually a good thing since you couldn't seem to stop."
Brittany was glad it was dark so Santana couldn't see the embarrassment on her face. "Sorry. I just… got carried away, I guess."
"Hell, don't be sorry," Santana grinned, "You just can't keep your hands off me."
"Me?" Brittany asked, hating that she wanted to laugh, "Who started this whole thing?"
Santana smiled then leaned in and gently nibbled on Brittany's lower lip. Brittany closed her eyes and forced herself to pull back. "We should go."
Santana, with some difficultly, sat up and looked across the backseat at Brittany. "My place or yours?"
"Yours," Brittany said and opened the backseat door and got out.
Santana grinned and did this same. When she got into the front seat, Brittany turned on the car and pulled out of the parking lot.
The ride to Santana's building was a quiet one, each girl lost in their own thoughts. When Brittany parked in front of Santana's building, she kept the car running.
"Umm, Britt," Santana said, "You're in a red zone. My building has guest parking so you can just…"
"I'm not coming in," Brittany said, letting out a breath.
"What?" Santana asked, surprised, "I thought…I mean, aren't we going to continue where we left off?"
Brittany shook her head.
Santana didn't think it was possible to feel embarrassed, rejected and disappointed all at once, but apparently it was possible. "Why?"
Brittany turned to look at Santana, "It's too fast. This special friendship you said we could have, it's …shouldn't we think it over or something? I know we only have like a month left…"
"Yeah," Santana chimed in, "And that's why we should have lots of sex before you leave and we hit this 'reset' button you suggested. Then, when you come ba…."
"It's weird!" Brittany interrupted, "Isn't it? I'm just so confused right now. I mean, the girl I've had a crush on for two years finally likes me too. I still can't believe it."
"We'll believe it," Santana said, "I do like you and want to be with you."
"But not date me," Brittany stated.
Santana sighed, "Can we not bring dating into this? I told you, I'm just not cut out for a relationship and I don't want to lose you as a friend and that's exactly what's going to happen if this does turn into a dating thing. You'll end up hating me and never speak to me again."
"That's not true," Brittany protested.
"Yes, it is!"
"And how is will this arrangement not make me hate you?" Brittany asked, now really confused.
"Hey, you suggested it," Santana said, "And, like you said, while you're in New York, we'll have time to see what this is."
"I…" Brittany began. She wasn't sure what she was going to say. "I'll, I'll think about it."
Santana let out a relieved breath. Truthfully, she had no idea what she was doing. She wanted Brittany and wanted to be with her, but there was that fear again. The one telling her that told her that she'd mess it up and Brittany would just become one of those girls she dated in college. Santana didn't want that. She felt like she needed to have Brittany in her life, somehow.
"OK," Santana said, "Thanks for dinner."
"You're welcome," Brittany said with a small smile.
"I'll call you tomorrow," Santana said and opened the door and got out.
Brittany nodded and watched as Santana walked into her building. "What the hell is going on?" She asked herself.
Her phone alerted her to a text. It was Quinn.
Hey! Haven't heard from you all day, you OK? Hung over from the club? - QF
Brittany smiled and texted her back.
Hi. Sorry, I've been busy. I'm not hung over anymore. - BP
Good. Just wanted to make sure you were OK. You can tell me all about it tomorrow at school. - QF
Brittany looked back at the front of Santana's building. She looked back at her phone and sent out another text.
How about now? I should be home in like 15 minutes. Want to come over? - BP
Sure! I'll be there. :-) - QF
Brittany put her phone down and drove home.
###
"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard," Kurt said.
Santana hugged her couch pillow closer. After Brittany had dropped her off, she had called Kurt to come over and told him everything that had happened with Brittany.
"It's not."
"Yes, it is!" Kurt said, "You're trying to have your cake and eat it too!"
"I…," Santana began but stopped when she realized Kurt had a point. "Maybe. But this was Brittany's idea! Not mine."
"Uh, yeah," Kurt said, "An idea she had while she was totally wasted."
"Look, it was still her idea," Santana said not sure if she was trying to convince Kurt or herself this was the way to go. "I'm just trying to do things the way she wants to."
Kurt let out a huff of air and leaned back on the couch and looked up at the ceiling. "What's happened to you?" Kurt asked turning to look at Santana. "Usually when you want a girl all you do is point and she's yours and you don't care what happens after."
Santana shrugged her shoulders.
"Even with Kate, you never went through this much trouble."
"Yeah, we'll let's chalk up Kate to a mistake made by temporary insanity." Santana said, "God, I still can't even believe I asked that girl to be my girlfriend and dated her for four months."
"None of us can," Kurt said, "You're not really a long term kinda girl."
"Exactly!" Santana said, "I'm not. And that's why I can't just go up to Brittany and ask her to be my girlfriend or whatever."
"So you're just going to sleep with her?," Kurt asked in disbelief, "Brittany isn't Kate. She's not a girl on your squad. She's not one of those sorority girls you like so much."
"I know that," Santana said softly, "And that's why I'm handling this the way she wants to."
"But…I really don't think using your usual 'sex first' technique is the best way to go here."
"Brittany fits with all of us," Santana continued,ignoring what Kurt's last sentence, "In our group, so I just…want to do what she wants. And she just got out of a long term relationship, one that was way more serious than mine. It's understandable she wants to do this."
"Wait," Kurt said holding up his hand, "Didn't she tell you she has a thing for Quinn?"
"Quinn's the one with the thing for Brittany," Santana clarified, "Brittany said she likes Quinn too, but after what happened between us, Quinn's not a problem."
"So, you're not worried Quinn's going to like swoop in or something?"
"Listen," Santana said letting go of the pillow in her hand, "Brittany sure as hell wasn't thinking about Quinn in the backseat of her car."
"Sometimes I forget you're ego has it's own zip code," Kurt said shaking his head.
"Brittany has had a thing for me for two years!" Santana almost shouted, "Two!"
"Seriously?" Kurt asked, intrigued.
"Yeah."
"Why didn't she ask you out?" Kurt asked.
"She said she didn't think I'd give her the time of day," Santana said.
"She's probably right," Kurt agreed.
"Excuse me? You think I would have turned Brittany down? Have you seen her? She's gorgeous!"
"She's very pretty," Kurt said, "But Cheerleader Santana wouldn't really go for Film Geek Brittany."
"You don't know that," Santana said crossing her arms. She wasn't sure why she was getting mad about some hypothetical situation.
"So what happens when Brittany goes to New York?" Kurt asked.
Santana shrugged her shoulders. "She goes to New York for the summer and when she comes back, maybe we can… I don't' know."
"You know she'll be in New York with Quinn," Kurt said, raising an eyebrow.
"I'm not going to lie," Santana said, "On paper, she and Brittany sound like the perfect couple. And before the club and Brittany's car, I thought Brittany might have a real thing for Quinn. But not anymore. She may say she does, but she doesn't. Not when she kissed me like that. No way! Brittany liked me first."
"'Brittany liked'…." Kurt began to repeat, "Good Lord, you sound like a second grader."
"Fuck you!"
Kurt sunk his body into the couch, "This just sounds like a big fucking mess and you're just making it more complicated than it has to be."
"It's not complicated," Santana said even thought she knew she was lying. "Brittany likes me. And I like her."
"That's your problem." Kurt said.
Santana just rolled her eyes. "What is?"
"You like Brittany and even care about her. It scares you."
"Fuck you." Santana said agin.
###
When Brittany got home she immediately changed into her favorite light blue pajama bottoms with kittens on them and a white tank top. The clothes she wore to dinner with Santana felt like they were suffocating her and she needed to get them off as soon as possible. It was still early, but she didn't plan on going out anymore.
There was a knock at her door. When she opened it she found a smiling Quinn holding a small box of cupcakes.
"I was craving something sweet," Quinn said, "You interested?"
Brittany smiled and brought Quinn in for a hug. Any confusing thoughts she had about what had happened earlier seemed to disappear. That's what she loved about being around Quinn, she loved feeling relaxed and feeling that everything was going to be OK. "Hi."
"Hi," Quinn said returning the hug as best she could while holding the cupcakes, "Are you OK?"
"Yeah," Brittany said pulling back, "Come in."
Quinn walked in and sat on the couch, putting the cupcakes on the coffee table in front of her. "I feel like I haven't seen you in months."
"Well, that's your fault," Brittany said, sitting next to Quinn, "You keep staying away from me."
"Right," Quinn said with a sad smile.
Even though it had only been a few days, Brittany had actually missed Quinn. She had thought her situation with Quinn was complicated and messed up, but she was wrong. Looking at Quinn now, every thing made more sense. There was no drama with Quinn, no worrying about special relationships, no worrying about living on opposite ends of the country, no complications. Nothing like what was happening with Santana.
"Do you still like me?" Brittany asked.
Quinn looked surprised. "Of course I do."
"I mean, really like me," Brittany tried to clarify, "Like me, like want to date me, like me."
Quinn let out a small chuckle, "Yeah. I like you and I would also like to date you."
Brittany smiled and couldn't help fell a little blush on her cheeks. "OK."
"What's this about?" Quinn asked, turning to sit so she could fully face Brittany.
"I had dinner with Santana earlier," Brittany said letting out a breath.
"Oh," Quinn siad quietly, "And?"
"She doesn't want to date me," Brittany said shrugging her shoulders.
"Then she's an idiot," Quinn said, "But, at the same time, I'm glad to hear it because, well, at least I know I'm back in the game."
"Am I the game?," Brittany asked smiling, "Because if I am, I'd like to be baseball and you were never out of it. I'm just figuring stuff out."
"And have you?" Quinn asked with a hint of hopefulness in her voice.
"I'm getting there," Brittany said, "But I do know that I like you. I like being with you and you don't make me all confused."
"Well, I'm glad," Quinn said with a bashful smile. She moved closer to Brittany and reached for her hand, "I'm still going to wait to ask you my question when we leave for New York, though. When we can have a totally fresh start."
"OK," Brittany said softly. She wondered if she could kiss Quinn. She wanted to see if kissing Quinn was like kissing Santana. Would it feel just as amazing? Would it feel just as hot? Would it feel just as tingly?
"What is it Britt?"
"Can…can I kiss you?" Brittany asked shyly, "Just once. It doesn't have to mean we're dating or anything. I mean, I'm still trying to figure things but I just…"
"Britt," Quinn said squeezing her hand, "Slow down."
"Sorry," Brittany said quietly. She looked into Quinn's eyes and relaxed. They were so different from Santana's eyes. Santana's eyes had this intense fire in them, but were also very soft they almost made Brittany melt. Quinn didn't have that fire, but she had this tranquility in them that made Brittany feel calm and safe.
"It's OK," Quinn siad softly.
Brittany scooted closer and lifted her hand to Quinn's cheek, then further back to the base of her neck. "Just once," Brittany said softly before bringing their lips together. The kiss was shy at first, and Brittany could only think of comparing this kiss to the ones she had shared with Santana and that wasn't helping her at all. She mentally shook her head and concentrated on kissing Quinn. Just Quinn. And when she did, she found that she really liked it.
Quinn's lips were soft and she tasted like strawberries. "Did you eat strawberries?" Brittany asked against Quinn's lips, her breath a little heavy.
"Umm…had a smoothie..before…" Quinn breathes before pulling Brittany back to her lips. Brittany felt Quinn's arms go around her neck and pulled her closer. Then she felt Quinn's tongue meet her own. She let out a small moan as she fell on top of Quinn until they were laying on her couch. Brittany couldn't believe she was in the exact same position she had been in earlier but with a different person. She had never kissed two people in the same day, ever. Hell, she had never kissed two people in the same month. But here she was, making out with Quinn when just a few hours ago she had made out with Santana.
With Santana things felt urgent, like any second Santana would disappear and she'd never see her again. Brittany had felt like she needed to kiss and feel as much of Santana as soon as possible because she knew she would never be able to get as much as she wanted. Everything felt hot and passionate. It was even a little scary.
With Quinn things felt more slow and and sweet. Like Brittany could kiss her for hours and waste the day away without any worry. Everything felt sensual and passionate and not scary at all.
Brittany moved from kissing Quinn's lips to kissing her neck, making Quinn moan. Brittany slowly continued to trail up Quinn's neck until she reached her jawline.
"Uh…Britt…," Quinn breathed out, "This…this is more than just, um, a kiss."
Brittany lifted her head and looked down at Quinn, "Sorry. I just got carried away."
Quinn let out a small laugh before lifting her head up and kissing Brittany's lips again. This time it was Brittany's turn to let out a small moan. She still couldn't believe she was actually doing this. This wasn't her. When she was with Santana she had felt a little guilty because of Quinn. Now that she was with Quinn, she was feeling guilty because of Santana.
"Mmmm…wait," Brittany said breaking away, "We…we have to stop."
"You're right," Quinn said and then proceeded to kiss Brittany's neck.
"Qui…," Brittany began to say, forcing herself not to close her eyes, "We should stop." Brittany pulled further back and sat back on the couch.
Quinn let out a long breath and moved to sit on the coach. "Sorry. I've just…I've been wanting to do that for a really long time."
Brittany smiled and ran a hand through her hair. "Why? I mean, why do you like me so much?"
"I just…my love life has been a mess since the first time I went out on a date. I swear I'm a magnet for jerks, assholes and bitches. I'm not good at relationships."
"Am I an asshole?" Brittany asked, seriously.
"God no!" Quinn said with a small laugh, "You're the opposite of an asshole. You're the opposite of anyone I've ever met. I just, I always end up getting screwed over and it sucks. You're the first person to actually show me you care about me and my life and…I just feel different with you. Like maybe I can give this relationship thing another try. You make me feel hope that not everyone out there is an asshole. Plus, you're really hot."
Brittany laughed. She was really touched by what Quinn had said and it made her feel closer to her. Brittany moved and brought her in for a hug, "I think you're really hot too."
"Thanks," Quinn said with a chuckle.
"And I don't think you're an asshole either," Brittany said pulling back. "Look, I'm still sorting this thing out with Santana."
Quinn slowly nodded.
"Let's wait, like you said, until we leave for New York," Brittany said, "Then you can ask me your question. But until then, let's just…be friends. OK?"
"OK," Quinn said, "Just remember Brittany, I do want to date you and we'll both be starting a new life in New York. I'm not playing any games. I want to be with you. I don't know if it'll work, but I want to give it a shot."
"I know," Brittany said softly. She loved how straight forward and honest Quinn was.
Quinn leaned in and placed a small kiss on Brittany's lips. "I'll be your friend for now. And even if you say no to my question, I'll still try to find a way to stay your friend."
"I'd really like that," Brittany said. She didn't want to lose Quinn and knowing that even if Brittany didn't chose to be with her, Quinn would still be in her life.
"I should go," Quinn said, "But before I go…"
Brittany was surprised when Quinn grabbed her by the back of her neck and brought her in for another deep kiss. Brittany kissed her back.
"Sorry," Quinn said letting her go, "It's just, that could have been my last chance to kiss you. Enjoy the cupcakes."
Once Quinn was gone, Brittany let her body stretch out on her couch. "Last chance."
###
Santana wasn't sure what to do. What exactly was the protocol for the day after having a heavy make out session with your student? Flowers? Candy? She sighed. She looked at the item in her hands and decided that a travel book about New York's best tourist spots would have to do. She had gone to the bookstore by her building earlier in the morning to pick up a copy of The American Literature Review, where she could finally see her short stories published. After picking up a couple of copies, she had wandered over to the travel section and ended up also buying a book for Brittany.
In truth, she felt like she needed an excuse to see Brittany, like she couldn't just show up without a reason. So here she was now, walking into the film department for the first time in her four years at this school, in search of the film major.
She walked down the hall and luckily ran into someone she knew.
"Santana!" Mike said coming up to her, "What bring you by to the Film Geek Lair?"
"Hey Mike," Santana said with a smile, surprised she was actually glad to see him, "I'm actually looking for Brittany. Have you seen her?"
"Figures," Mike said with a chuckle, "Umm, she's probably in the editing room. It's straight ahead to the right. Last door."
"Thanks Mike," Santana said, "You doing more make up stuff?"
"Yup. Final projects are coming up and everyone's going crazy trying to finish their movies or whatever they're working on. I'm actually on my way to put blood all over some guy."
"Groovy," Santana said.
"I love it!" Mike said with a big smile, "Gotta get lots of practice before I start working for a real special effects department."
"Oh, you have a job lined up already?"
"I do!" Mike said, proudly, "I'm going to be working over at New Directions Studios."
"Oh wow! Congrats."
"Thanks! I'm glad I got something here. Not like Britt who has to go all the way to New York. I'm trying to convince her to apply at New Directions.
"I'm sure they'd hire her in a second," Santana stated, "But, she's really excited about this New York thing, maybe when that's over and she comes back you can hook her up at New Directions."
Santana saw the confused look on Mike's face and wondered what that was about.
"Umm, yeah, I guess," Mike said, "Maybe by that time I'll have been promoted and have more pull there. Anyway, sorry but I gotta go. Blood and guts await!"
"Later Mike," Santana said. Santana wondered just how good of a make up artist Mike was if he thought he could get promoted by fall.
"Oh hey!" Mike shouted from the end of the hall, "Did you get Rachel's grad party invite?"
"Not yet!" Santana said rolling her eyes. She couldn't believe that elf had actually made invitations like she was in elementary school.
"It's going to be awesome!" Mike yelled and left he building.
Santana walked over to the editing room and saw blond hair just peaking over one of the large monitors. She took a deep breath. "Hey."
The blond looked up. It was the wrong blond.
"Oh, hey Santana," Quinn said looking up, "How's it going?" She gave her a big smile almost like she was actually happy to see her.
Santana wasn't sure what was going on. Quinn looked happy. Santana tried not to shake her head in pity. She actually felt a little sorry for Quinn. The poor girl had this huge crush on Brittany and Brittany was just going to break her heart. The thought actually made Santana smirk. She wasn't one to wish bad things on anyone, well not always, but something about Quinn really bugged her.
"Hi Quinn." Santana walked into the editing room and stopped next to the desk across the one Quinn was sitting in, "Shouldn't you be filing or something? Isn't this editing equipment for students only?"
Quinn let out a small chuckle, "I can use it too. I'm just touching up one of my shorts so I can add it to my film portfolio."
Santana looked at the screen and raised an eyebrow in confusion. All she saw was some girl running across a field with a chair over her head. "Looks…weird."
"It's not done," Quinn said smiling. "So, what bring you by?"
"Brittany," Santana said with a sly smile.
"Hmmm," Quinn hummed looking straight into Santana's eyes, "I haven't seen her today, but she should be here soon."
"I'll wait." Santana put her bag on the empty desk behind her and sat down.
Quinn went back to her editing. "Brittany said you guys had dinner last night. Did you have fun?"
Santana froze in surprise. Brittany had told Quinn about their dinner? Did she tell her about what happened in the backseat of the car? "Umm, yeah. The food was good."
"No dessert?" Quinn asked never taking her eyes off the screen.
Santana felt like she was in some secret competition with Quinn. Everything seemed just a little more tense than it should be. "Nope."
"People hardly have dessert anymore," Quinn said, "I'm sure Brittany enjoyed her dessert back at her place."
Santana was starting to wonder if Quinn was drunk. She wasn't making any sense. "I guess."
Quinn looked at Santana, her eyes landing on the book in front of her, "Is that a New York travel book?"
"Yeah," Santana said, "I figured Britt would need one while she's there."
"That's sweet of you," Quinn said, "Though, I've been to New York a million times, I was planning on showing her around. And besides, after a few weeks she won't be a tourist anymore."
Santana fought the urge to get up and punch Quinn in the face. "Well, you can't be with her all the time. I'm sure she's going to want her space."
"Probably," Quinn said, smiling.
"So," Santana said crossing her legs, "You lied to me."
"When?"
"You said you aren't into women, but a little bird told me you are."
Quinn gave Santana a small smile and retuned to her screen. "I said I wasn't a lesbian. I'm not. But I am into women."
Santana just rolled her eyes. Guess that's just another thing Quinn and Brittany have in common, she thought. She was starting to wonder if waiting for Brittany was a good idea. She should just text her and ask her to meet at The Bean later. She looked over at Quinn and crossed her arms. No, she'd stay here. This silent standoff she was having with Quinn was not over and Santana sure as hell wasn't going to lose.
##
Brittany walked across the quad and headed straight to the film department. She hadn't gotten halfway across when she heard her name. She turned around and saw the last person she expected. Kate.
"Hi Brittany," Kate said with a smile, "How are you?"
"Oh, uh, hey Kate…I'm fine," Brittany said, feeling slightly nervous, "How are you?"
"Great," Kate said, her smile never leaving her face, "I saw you at the club the other day. With Santana."
Brittany swallowed. She just nodded.
"Listen Brittany," Kate said, her voice sounding impossibly nice, "I'm going to give you some advice. That video you made for me, got me an audition for a Lifetime movie and I got the part!"
"Gre…great," Brittany stammered, "Congratulations."
"Thanks!" Kate said proudly, "Anyway, because of your video, I'm getting a huge break. I fee like I owe you."
"But, you paid me already."
"No Brittany," Kate said, "Owe you some advice. Don't become one of Santana's play things."
Brittany's eyes went wide.
"I saw the way you were dancing with her at the club," Kate went on, "Don't let her suck you in to her little sex trap. She'll use you and dump you."
"Why are you telling me this?" Brittany wasn't sure where any of this was coming from.
"I told you," Kate said, "Your video got me a part in that Lifetime movie, I'm just doing you a favor." Kate reached over and gave Brittany's arm a squeeze. "Santana will try to sleep with you as soon as possible then keep that up for about a week or so and you'll never hear from her again. That's her thing."
Brittany shook her head, "But, she dated you for like six months or something."
"Almost five months," Kate corrected, "And, we'll, what can I say, she fell in love with me at first sight."
"Then why did she dump you?"
Kate looked angry. "She didn't dump me, I dumped her! Actually, we decided to take a break because things were getting too serious. We just needed to step back for a bit. I'm sure she'll come crawling back."
Brittany wasn't sure what to say.
"Anyway," Kate said, "If you don't believe me about Santana, just ask some of the girls in her squad. Or some of the girls over at Alpha Omega Kappa. They'll all tell you the same thing. I would just hate to see you get hurt."
Brittany still said nothing. She was trying to process everything that Kate was saying. Was it true? Is that why Santana was so willing to go along with the special friendship for a month plan, she wondered. No strings attached.
"I…" Brittany began.
"I have to go," Kate said, "It's best if you just stay away from her. You know who you should date? That girl Quinn you're always hanging around with. She seems super sweet."
Kate gave Brittany one last smile and left.
###
Santana was getting impatient. She had only been waiting for Brittany 10 minutes but it felt like an hour, mostly thanks to Quinn. Just her mere presence made time move slower. Just as she was about to take out her phone to text Brittany, the film major entered the room.
"Hey Quinn, sorry I'm late but I ran into…." Brittany stopped talking when she was in the room and spotted Santana. Spotted Santana sitting across from Quinn. "Oh crap," She said under her breath. She felt like her heart had travled from her chest to her throat. Seeing the two people she had made out with last night in the same room, was right out of some movie.
"Hey Brittany," Santana said standing up, a smile on her face. She hated that she felt kind of nervous.
"Umm, hey," Brittany said surprised, "What…what are you doing here?"
"She bought you a book," Quinn answered leaning back in her chair.
Santana turned to glare at Quinn then turned to Brittany. Her expression softened. "I was in the book store and I saw this." She lifted the book so Brittany could have a better look, "For your trip."
Brittany was actually touched that Santana had gotten her a gift but wasn't sure how to react with Quinn watching her too. "Wow, thanks." Brittany said and returned Santana's smile.
Santana went up to Brittany, glad to turn her back to Quinn and gave Brittany the book. "So you can get ideas on where to take me when I go visit." Santana said softly, so that Quinn couldn't hear.
Brittany wanted to hug Santana but didn't. Having Quinn and Santana in the same room was not helping her sort out her feelings. "I'll pick some good places."
Santana quickly looked back to glance at Quinn. The film assistant was watching them without even trying to be subtle. Santana turned back to Brittany and lowered her voice. "Did you think about, what we talked about last night?"
Brittany could only feel disappointment at Santana's question and heard Kate's words in her head. "Umm, no…can we talk about this later?"
"Right," Santana said, "Somewhere without an audience."
"Holly's waiting for us Britt," Quinn said from her desk.
"Yeah, sure," Brittany said holding on to her new book for dear life.
Before anyone could say anything else, Rachel burst into the editing room.
"Oh fantastic!" Rachel said sounding impossibly energetic, "I came looking for Brittany but I'm glad you two are here as well."
"What do you want?" Santana asked, annoyed.
"I have your invitations for my party," Rachel said handing one to each woman.
"Sugar's party," Santana said.
"My party!" Rachel said, "It's my house, so my party."
"I thought you were going to mail these?" Brittany asked.
"This seemed more personal," Rachel said, "Also there's less of a chance for them to get lost in the mail."
"Thanks Rachel," Quinn said, "I mean, even though I'm not graduating, I'd love to go to your party."
"Yay!" Rachel said clapping her hands, "I'm glad you're going Quinn. Even though we haven't hung out much, I consider you part of our group."
"Are you even part of our group?" Santana asked Rachel.
"Anyway," Rachel said ignoring Santana, "You better be there Quinn."
"I will be," Quinn said, smiling.
"Great!" Rachel said, "We'll I'll leave you ladies. I have many invites to give out."
Santana looked at the clock on the wall and realized if she should probably get to her class. "I'll walk with you Rachel. I have to get to English."
"Perfect!" Rachels said, "I want to bounce some ideas off of you about the menu."
Santana groaned and was already regretting her decision. She turned to Brittany. "I'll call you later. I really want to finish talking about...things."
Brittany nodded. She watched Rachel and Santana leave the editing room and then turned to Quinn.
"What does she want to talk about?" Quinn asked.
"She...my paper," Brittany lied, "I still have one more to write so I can graduate."
Quinn smiled. "You'll graduate Britt. And I'll be there in the front row, cheering you on."
Brittany took in a deep breath. Graduation was so close and she just wished it as already behind her.
###
Santana took a deep breath and raised her hand to knock on Brittany's door. The day turned out to be busy for both of them that they couldn't find time to meet on campus, so Brittany had invited Santana over to her apartment to finish their talk. Talk. Santana smirked and knew that if this meeting would be anything like their last two, talking wasn't the only thing happening tonight.
Santana hadn't stopped thinking about what had happened and about their possible arrangement. All she knew was that she wanted Brittany. Wanted to be with her and near her. She had spent most of last night thinking about why she was so drawn to Brittany and still couldn't figure it out. Which was why Santana felt that maybe if they just slept together, things would be more clear. She didn't care what Kurt had said, her "sex first technique" was the way to go. Brittany wanted it that way, and maybe, that's what this was anyway. Just some sort of lust filled attraction.
"Yeah right," Santana said to herself. Even in her mind, she couldn't totally buy that excuse.
She raised her hand and knocked.
Brittany heard the knock at the door and wiped her palms on her shorts. Her hands had gotten impossibly sweaty. She reached the door and slowly opened it. Santana stood there looking just as beautiful as ever. "Hi."
"Hey," Santana said with a big smile. They stood there for a while and as much as she liked looking at Brittany, she really wanted to come in. "Are we doing this out here?"
"Oh! Right!" Brittany said moving away from the door, "Come in."
Santana smiled and stepped inside. Brittany's apartment was only slightly bigger han hers but felt more lived in. Well, it would if it weren't for the boxes all over the living room. "Do you really need to pack everything? I mean, all you'll really need is your clothes in N.Y.C."
"I'm moving most of it to my parent's house," Brittany said closing the door, "My lease is up for this place so I don't need it anymore."
"Oh," Santana said, going to sit on the couch, "I guess you can stay with your parents until you find another place."
Brittany furrowed her eyebrows, "Um, I guess. When I visit I'll be staying with them."
"Cool," Santana said, happy to hear that Brittany would be coming back during the summer. "Do yo need help packing?"
"Nah, I'm good." Brittany smiled and went over to sit next to Santana. She felt like she was repeating what had happened last night. But except Santana was sitting next to her and not Quinn.
"So," Santana said letting out a nervous chuckle, "Let's just get down to it. Should we try this special friendship you suggested?"
Brittany forced a smile as Kate's words echoed in her mind. Santana will try to sleep with you as soon as possible. "Umm..."
Santana inched closer. She had wanted to kiss Brittany as soon as the door opened. She couldn't understand how this one girl had such a strong pull over her. Was it because she hadn't had sex in a while, she wondered. But if it was just horny hormones, Santana could have called up any of her past hook ups and taken care of things weeks ago. This was something else.
"Just as a reminder..." Santanas whispered. She got even closer to Brittany and slowly closed the gap between them and their lips met, again.
Brittany let herself fall into Santana's sex trap or whatever it was that Kate had called it. She just couldn't help herself, not when she had imagined kissing Santana for so long. Her lips were so soft and warm and, to Brittany, they even felt fluffy. When she felt the tip of Santana's tongue on her lower lip, Brittany parted her mouth more and encouraged Santana to slip her tongue inside.
Any anxiety Santana had had about kissing Brittany was gone. Brittany was kissing her back with the same want and fervor that Santana felt. Without breaking the kiss, she moved and straddled Brittany, happy that she had decided to wear a skirt and that Brittany was wearing shorts. The contact of their bare skin made this make out session a thousand times better. All Santana wanted to do was rip off every piece of clothing Brittany was wearing and feel her naked against her. Santana really did wonder if it was the lack of sex for weeks that was making her feel so turned on or if it was Brittany. Maybe it was both, but right now she didn't care.
If Brittany hadn't been so focused on how her and Santana's tongues were crashing into each other, she was sure she would have freaked out that Santana was now sitting on her lap. The hot skin of her thigh slowly rocking against her bare skin. Every fantasy she had ever had about Santana was coming true in some way or another and Brittany still couldn't believe how much better the reality of everything was. She wondered how Santana could make her feel like she was losing the last bit of her self control because that's what was happening. She felt it happening. She felt Santana move her lips to her neck. She felt Santana slowly rock her hips into her. She felt just how damp Santana's panties were. Brittany let out a moan. Santana was just as turned on as she was.
"See," Santana breathed into Brittany's ear, "You...you can't keep your hands off of me."
Brittany nibbled on Santana's earlobe before answering. "You started this. Again."
Santana was surprised that she actually giggled like some school girl. She leaned back to look at Brittany's eyes and her giggle faded when she saw just how intense they were. They were a shade darker than usual. "So, I take it you want to do this? The Special Friendship you suggested."
Brittany blinked. There it was again. Santana already wanting to have an excuse not have this be anything more than friends having sex. "You called it a Special Friendship. Not me."
"Fine," Santana said, shrugging her shoulders, "I called it that, but this was your idea."
Brittany looked away and sighed. This had been her idea and she was starting to regret ever suggesting it. "I..I only suggested it because I really didn't think you'd say yes. And I also didn't think you actually liked me more than just a friend."
Santana wrapped her arms around Brittany's neck and kissed her cheek. "Well, I am saying yes." Having her arms around Brittany and feeling Brittany run her hands up and down her thighs felt so intimate. Santana found herself liking this. So much.
"I've never done this," Brittany said softly.
Santana slowly leaned back. "Done what?"
"This," Brittany said pointing at Santana then herself.
Santana's eyes went wide and she suddenly felt like she was taking advantage of Brittany. Could it be? "Wait, you've never been with a girl?"
Brittany didn't hide her confusion. "What? No. I mean, yes, I've had sex with other girls. I meant, I've never had, like an arrangement for sex. All the guys and girls I've been with, we've been like a couple or dated for a bit."
"How many people?" Santana asked before she could stop herself.
"What does it matter?"
Santana shook her head. "Never mind. Listen, let's just see what happens, OK? I think we'd be amazing together."
"But just amazing at sex?" Brittany asked, wanting to clarify, "Not amazing as a couple?"
Santana inwardly groaned. She was sure dating Brittany would be a disaster. A disaster for Brittany. Thinking back to her two failed relationships, she came to the realization that she was a shitty girlfriend. She'd always forget the little things a good girlfriend was supposed to remember. The food your girlfriend liked, special dates, names of her friends, birthdays, and so on.
She wasn't a good girlfriend. She wasn't romantic. She wasn't as supportive as she should be. Brittany didn't deserve someone like her. Someone so self absorbed. But Santana had to admit that she did want Brittany and to be with her, but she just couldn't take the chance that one day she'd see the disappointment and frustration in Brittany's eyes because of what a crappy girlfriend Santana had been. Or worse, Santana hurting Brittany because she had gotten tired of being with her. She couldn't take that chance. Kurt had been right, Santana wanted her cake and to eat it too.
"We just got out of relationships," Santana tried to explain, "Don't you want a break from that? This could be like a trial run with only the good stuff."
Brittany forced a smile. "I can't."
"What?"
"I know I suggested this, but I can't." Brittany felt like she wanted to cry, but she pushed it down. She didn't want Santana to see her cry. "I've never done this before and I...I don't want to. That's not me."
Santana slowly got up from Brittany's lap and sat on the couch. They sat in silence for a while until Santana finally just uttered "OK."
Brittany got up, needing some space from Santana. "You want some water or something?"
Santana tried to smile and she was pretty sure she was successful, "Sure."
"I'll be right back."
When Brittany was gone, Santana got up and explored the living room. There were boxes everywhere and half of Brittany's stuff was already packed. Santana spotted some figurines of cats and unicorns on Brittany's desk. She picked one up and smiled. Of course, Brittany would have cats and unicorns on her desk. It actually made perfect sense. As she put back a cat, she spotted her own face looking up at her from the trash can near the desk. She bent down and picked up the wadded paper and smoothed it out. It was a picture of her from one her photo shoots for the school magazine. Santana loked back at the wastebasket and saw more pictures of herself. All from press clippings from her time as ULA's Superstar Cheerleader.
"What is this?" Santana asked herself. The more she looked the more it looked like maybe Brittany had had some sort of scrap book about her. Santana wasn't sure if that was sweet or creepy. Brittany did say she had a crush on her, but this was a bit much. Then there were those comments Brittany had made. Like Brittany liking having a souvenir sweatshirt from Santana Lopez. Like Brittany not believing she was making out with Santana Lopez. Did Brittany only like her because of her popularity and status? Brittany had become more popular because of their friendship. Mike, Mila and others had told her as such. Maybe Brittany didn't want to do this arrangement because she had gotten what she wanted. Popularity.
Santana shoved all the clippings back in the wastebasket when she heard Brittany coming back. She quickly moved back to the couch.
"Here you go," Brittany said handing Santana her bottled water.
Santana felt awkward all of a sudden. "Thanks. Umm, so, I think I'm going to go."
"You...you're leaving?" Brittany tried not to feel hurt. She had said no to sleeping with Santana and now she was leaving. It felt like Santana had no use for her now so there was no point in sticking around.
"Yeah," Santana said, quickly glancing at the wastebasket by the desk, "I've...I have a reading of my short stories the day after tomorrow. At school. We have those every month and since the magazine with my short stories was published, I'm reading some excerpts."
"Oh cool! That's awesome."
"It is," Santana said, slowly inching towards the door, "I still haven't even prepared so, umm, I'm going to do that now." Santana smiled at Brittany and opened the front door.
"Wait!"
Santana turned around.
"I bought a couple of the literature magazine," Brittany said, "I'm going to read your stories."
Santana felt a warmth in her chest. "I hope you like them."
"I will," Brittany said with a smile, "Also... are we OK?"
Santana saw the uncertain look on Brittany's face and all she wanted was to reassure her. "We're fine. Everything is fine. I gotta go. I'll call you later."
"OK," Brittany said and watched Santana leave and close the door. She wasn't sure how to feel right now.
Santana walked to her car and thought about all those press clippings. She shook her head. No, she thought, Brittany wasn't like that. Brittany didn't just like her because of her status. She headed straight home. She needed to clear her head.
-tbc-
A/N: Sorry for the wait. I got more hours at work and I don't have as much free time. I'll keep you updated on statuses and stuff on my tumblr or twitter.
Having said that, thanks for continuing to read.