Heart no Kuni no Naruto
by Sakura (aka L-sama no Miko)
Chapter 14
"It has been a while hasn't it, Naruto-kun?" he said blocking the boy's escape. "And just what have you been up to? Nothing a gentleman would allow himself to do I'm sure."
Naruto could only stand there and glare nervously at the raven haired yakuza boss. 'Why?! Why did he have to show up now?!'
"Naruto?" Gaara asked solicitously, adding a glare of his own. How dare that man interrupt his quality time with the cute blond?! "Why don't you go get that tea you're so found of? They have an entire table full of it. Why don't you show him where it is, Lee?" he added nudging the green clad teen.
"Gaara?! Why should I…?" He then noticed the visibly upset blond. "Right! I will make sure our less than youthful… uh… friend thoroughly enjoys her majesty's most youthful libations."
"Well, ya did say you wanted to have some more, right Ita?" the March Hare added, also perturbed by the distraught Naruto.
"Hn." The Hatter took one last look at the now trembling blond before following Lee, a rather concerned Deidara trailing behind.
"Gaara…" Naruto started, hanging his head in shame at his inability to stand up to the yakuza boss. "I'm really sorry for… being such a pain."
The Cheshire Cat gently lifted the boy's chin and gave him an enormous grin, "It's alright Naruto," he said, "I just wanted to get rid of that man so we can dance some more. They haven't finished the song. Now give me a smile. You know how much I like to see you smile."
The blond sniffled a bit and blushed, but managed to smile shyly at the redhead.
"Hey! No fair!"
"We're still here!" Tobi and Obito cried and latched themselves onto Naruto's arms, angry at being ignored, "We wanna dance with the nii-chan!"
"Tobi wants to dance double!"
"Wait your turn, brats," growled Gaara, "We're not done."
"Perhaps this problem can be solved with a group dance," one of the many faceless servants of Heart Castle suggested upon overhearing the twins' argument.
"What sort of group dance?" Gaara asked, eyeing the girl warily.
"Why not the Caucus Race?" another palace servant suggested.
"Caucus… Race?" Naruto parroted.
"It's a circle dance!" Obito said grabbing Naruto's hand with one of his own and the hand of one of the servants with the other.
"But… but won't we take up too much of the floor?" the blond asked, not wanting to get in the way of the other dancers.
"Certainly not!" the servant protested. "Even though most of the people here are enemies, no one will be offended."
"Unless they kill someone," a third servant said, join in the growing circle.
"Yes, there is no real etiquette tonight, everyone is free to mingle and dance as they please," a fourth servant, one from Lee's park, piped as he joined the circle.
"Wow this like kinda like line dancing back in camp," Naruto said getting into the fun as the others began to pull him along, making him jog after Obito.
"Tch. Whatever," muttered a rather jealous Cheshire Cat, "You brats! You cut me off!" he spat when he found he couldn't join in the circle next to Naruto.
"Ha! Ha!" jeered Obito, "Stupid kitty's not gonna get a spot next to the nii-chan!" He then yanked Naruto out of the cat boy's reach, but not before sticking out his tongue and pulling on his lower eye lid.
Gaara snarled, then stormed off from the circle.
"Welcome back," Sai said as a panting Naruto made his over to the large French doors on the other side of the ballroom. "Already finished dancing, Naru-kun?"
"Nah," the blond replied, "Just takin' a breather to get a drink. Man I'm parched!"
"Here," the Knight of Hearts said, handing him a glass of punch. He had been about to give the smaller teen one of the flutes filled with champagne, but quick picked up the punch at receiving a scathing look from Sasori. However, he surreptitiously poured a bit of the liquor into the glass of punch using the quick reflexes he had gained from years of sword fighting.
"Thanks!" Naruto crowed happily and quickly gulped the cold fruit juice down. "Ahhh! That felt good!"
"Were you with that particularly noisy bunch out on the floor?" the Mortician asked, frowning at the people still performing the Caucus Race.
"Yeah. Wanna go back with me?"
"Completely out of the question!" the taller redhead snapped.
"Aww, but it's fun!" pleaded the shorter teen.
"I'm in no condition to start exerting myself."
"Not feeling well?" Sai asked, glancing curiously at his friend.
"Hmnm… you do look kinda pale… well paler than usual," added Naruto. "Wait a sec, Sai. This stuff doesn't have alcohol in it does it?" he asked worriedly. Maybe that was what was making Sasori feel ill.
"Of course it does," Sai said, smiling his usual cheesy smile. "All the drinks at this table do."
Sasori glared at the Knight, "You spiked the punch again didn't you?" he whispered angrily. "I'd find a drink elsewhere if I were you," he said to Naruto, "Sai has a nasty habit of forcing others in following his less than perfect behavior."
"Y-You mean he's done that to you before?" Naruto asked, shocked.
"He has coerced me into joining his binge drinking, if that's what you mean."
"Stop being so sour, Sasori," pouted Sai, "Isn't that what parties are for?"
"Put a sock in it freak," retorted the grumpy clock fixer.
"That wasn't very nice," Sai said with mock hurt.
"Regardless, it's true. You've been into the booze ever since we got here and you're not even the tiniest bit drunk. Any normal person would be choking on their own puke or died of liver failure by now."
Naruto's eyes bulged out of their sockets. 'Yep. Sai's definitely a freak.'
"You're wrong Sasori," explained the slightly shorter brunet, "I did get drunk earlier. I hadn't drunk so much in a while so I got inebriated right away. But once I kept drinking, I eventually got sober again, so now I'm trying to get drunk again."
"You're not making any sense!" groused the Mortician.
"Well then," quipped Sai, "I guess I'm so drunk now that I don't know what's going on with me."
"Here!" Naruto said shoving the spiked punch at the Knight of Hearts. "I'm gonna see if I can find some water."
"Aww, but alcohol is sooooo much better, Naru-kun," Sai protested.
"Hmph! This is why you males disgust Us," came an annoyed female voice. Naruto whirled around to see the Queen of Hearts standing before them. She had changed from her usual red and black gown she had been wearing earlier into an off the shoulder red and pink ball gown that had a black bodice and red arm gloves with pink and black ribbon trimming. The miniature crown still gracing her perfectly coifed Sakura colored hair. "Not only do you constantly make stupid and reckless choices of behavior, you also feel the need to drag others into such deviant ways. Most unseemly! Here, We believe you would much rather prefer this, would you not Naruto?" she asked, handing the blond a glass of water.
"Y-Yeah, thanks," he stammered, blushing slightly at the beautiful girl. "Hey, this tastes like flowers! What kind of drink is this?" he asked, fearful that it might be alcoholic as well.
"Why rose water of course," the queen replied, "We had the nectar extracted from Our very own roses earlier this afternoon. Isn't the fragrance wonderful?"
"Um… yeah. It is," the blond replied hesitantly.
"Why would anyone want to drink perfume?" Sai said, asking the question that was on the tip of the blond's tongue, making a slightly disgusted face.
"Be silent you Neanderthal!" shouted Queen Sakura, a rather dark aura starting to surround her. "It's obvious you are so uncivilized that such an elegant delicacy is beyond your comprehension! We are ashamed you are in Our employ. Naruto!" she said, the aura quickly simmering down, "you are to abandon these louts and dance with Us at once!"
"Not to be rude or anything, but isn't the queen supposed to dance with someone more important than someone like me?"
"You dare to refuse me?" Sakura asked, smiling dangerously.
"N-N-N-N-No way!" Naruto stammered.
"Good. We are pleased," the pink haired girl said, yanking on the poor blond's arm with the force of a four ox drawn cart.
"We shall stop now," Queen Sakura said, once the song had finished.
"I-I-I'm r-r-really s-s-sorry!" Naruto stammered, fearing he'd angered the pinkette, "I-I'm n-not that g-good of a d-dancer!"
"Sit!" she demanded after dragging the blond over to a plush loveseat not to far away. Naruto hurried to obey, almost tripping over his feet to do so. The Queen of Hearts couldn't help smiling at the boy's antics. "You have Our permission to remove your shoes." Naruto stared at her confusedly, "We are not blind, Naruto," the girl continued sternly, "We saw you trying to hide the pain in your feet."
The blond blushed and rubbed the back of his head sheepishly, "It's not that bad," he said, relieved that some of the feeling in his feet came back now that he got the weight off them. "I can still dance with you. I-I kinda liked it," the last bit being mumbled shyly.
"Nonesense!" Queen Sakura ordered, "Off with those at once!" The boy gulped and hurriedly removed the stiff leather formal shoes. She frowned slightly at the blisters littering his feet, some being on the verge of tearing open and bleeding. "We too must endure the pain that comes from the burden of socially required formal wear." She then promptly kicked off the blood red pumps she'd been wearing and let out a tiny sigh of relief when the cool night air hit her own aching feet. "A man would only notice a person's discomfort once they've been reduced to tears," the queen said disdainfully, sitting next to Naruto and laying a sympathetic hand on one knee, "Most of you males are so unreliable when it comes to life's many challenges, that is why We refuse to depend on any man. It would be best if you'd take Our advice, Naruto and not allow yourself to lose your head over a man. Reliance on one's own strength is what is most important."
'S-Sakura… wow! She's even more mature and classy than Ino-nee! There's no way I could ever be like that,' the blond mused in awe at the now calm and collected queen.
"Hn. You really believe he is interested in anything other than a man's love," the Hatter yakuza head sneered, approaching the couple. "He certainly doesn't have Your Majesty's nerves of steel."
'I-Itachi! What the hell is he doing here?!'
Queen Sakura's emerald eyes flared and narrowed dangerously at the raven haired man, "We despise eavesdroppers," she hissed.
"I was hardly eavesdropping," Itachi replied, unfazed by the girl's threatening aura, "I was having my tea over there." He gestured to a large table laden with several tea pots and trays of snacks a few feet away. "You were so noisy that I lost my train of thought. I feel as though that this man must intercede here."
"Um… Ita," Deidara interjected, trying his best to diffuse a rather tricky situation that was bound to get worse rather rapidly, "Maybe you… um… should…"
"Be silent you impertinent males!" the Queen of Hearts bellowed, "You forget your place, Uchiha!"
"I was under the impression that court etiquette wasn't required tonight," the taller man jeered, "It would seem her majesty has become scatterbrained."
"ITACHI UCHIHA!" screamed the now frumious queen, "IF NOT FOR THIS BALL, I WOULD HAVE YOUR HEAD FOR THAT!"
"Uh… Y-Your M-Majesty…" Naruto pleaded nervously, "H-He's j-just trying to provoke you." However, the queen just continued to growl and stare at the infuriating man. 'Kakashi really wasn't kidding when he said they try to kill each other all the time, but what the heck were they doin' back in Itachi's rose garden?! I just don't get it!' "Um… Dei," the boy said sidling over to the March Hare, "do you think you can try and get 'em to calm down?"
The taller blond glanced over at the arguing two and let out a helpless sigh. "I'll try, un. But I don't think it'll work."
"What did I tell you," Itachi said, leering at Naruto, "that adorable little hussy always runs off to the nearest man whenever he needs something."
"H-Hussy?!" Naruto shouted in indignation.
"He did the very same thing when we first met. He ran and hid behind his harem of puppets. They all go out of their way to make fools of themselves just to please him," continued the Hatter.
"So what if he likes being on top," Queen Sakura shot back, "What's wrong with the small being in charge?!"
"If you think he's anything like you then you're sadly mistaken," retorted Itachi, "He uses his mystique as an outsider to influence everyone. He controls them by teasing."
The Queen of Hearts let out an enormous laugh, "Itachi you idiot! What good would that do Naruto? He's not like Us, he's not like you either. Why don't you just admit it? You're jealous! You're jealous because you're the only one Naruto can't stand. That's why you go out of your way to insult him. You've become such a child, Itachi. We just might even say such behavior is rather quaint."
"Jealous?" scoffed the taller man, "Hardly. You must be mad. Though such accusations are typical of a senile narcissist like you."
"WHAT DID YOU CALL US?!" the pinkette roared, the scepter she'd been holding snapping in half in her iron grip.
"Itachi! Back off man!" Deidara shouted, stepping between the two combatants, "We're on her turf, un! If ya go starting a fight, we're really gonna be screwed, un!"
The yakuza boss glared at his subordinate and friend before letting out an annoyed 'hn' and walking off.
"Just where do you think you're going, Uchiha?!"
"You have guestrooms do you not?" he asked, pausing in mid-step.
"Of course We do," snapped Queen Sakura, "But I don't see what…"
"I'm taking one," Itachi stated, "I've had enough of being bored out of my mind by your pathetic party. I'm going to bed."
"You chauvinistic pig!" the Queen of Hearts yelled at the Hatter's retreating back, cracking what was left of her scepter, "That man is the enemy of all women!"
"There you are, Sakura," the King of Hearts said, finally able to approach his wife. Shikamaru being the way he was, he hadn't bothered to change out his everyday robes. "It's a drag having to go looking all over for you."
"What do you want," she all but snarled at her husband, still miffed at Itachi's antagonistic behavior.
"There are some guests who are waiting to be greeted by you. That troublesome Hatake is greeting them in your place and he's been threatening to go on a shooting spree if you don't get over there to relieve him soon."
"That lazy good for nothing rabbit," grumbled Sakura. "Fine We shall go back." She then retrieved her formerly discarded shoes and put them back on. "We do hope you do not let Uchiha's unruly behavior keep you from enjoying the rest of the night, Naruto," she said, giving the blond a sisterly smile before heading back into the throng.
"Yeah, about Itachi," Deidara started, taking a seat next to Naruto on the loveseat, "Sorry about that, un. I just don't get why he'd say stuff like that, un."
"Yeah, me too," the smaller blond replied, "I don't know why he thinks I'm some kind of flirt or something and actually I really don't give a damn if he does. But what I wanna know is why the heck he can't be civil for once?! I'm getting pretty sick getting treated like crap by him!" The boy shot up out of his seat and angrily shoved his still aching feet into his shoes. "That's it! I'm not gonna run from that b $^ *d anymore! If it's a fight he wants, then that's just what Itachi's gonna get!" He then promptly stormed off in the direction the Hatter yakuza head had just taken.
"Naru-kun matte, un!" Deidara called after the irate teen, but Naruto proved to be pretty quick in spite of the pain his poor feet were in.
'Now where the heck are the guestrooms again?' Naruto asked as he wandered aimlessly through Heart Castle's many labyrinthine halls.
"Now where would the fire be, I wonder," Kakashi said, stepping out from the shadows as the blond passed by another junction. "Where are you off to in such a hurry, Naru-chan?"
"Kakashi," Naruto said upon seeing the silver haired rabbit man. 'Something's off about him today.' "I-I'm um… looking for Itachi," he stammered nervously haven decided to just tell the truth.
"Is that so? Itachi you say?"
''Kay, now I'm officially weirded out here. The pervy rabbit's usually all over me whenever he sees me. What gives?!'
"Naruto," the White Rabbit said, forgoing the use of his usual pet name, "It was me who wanted you to come to Wonderland. I thought I'd be content enough knowing that you were here, even if you weren't at my side. I truly did believe that. That's the way love should be, however now I'm… conflicted. I love you, Naruto and I want you to be happy. That is all I could ever need. I used that wish to bring you here, yet I just can't stand to see you with anyone else. I just can't. I can no longer continue to watch over you and bear the pain. Tell me Naruto, what should I do?"
"K-Kakashi…" the blond sputtered, truly stunned and rooted to the spot by the taller man's passionate confession.
"I've never fallen in love before so all these feelings are so confusing to me, I just don't know how to understand them. Why can't you just choose me?! Why do I want your love more than I do your happiness? I can barely endure just being your friend."
"Kakashi… I… I'm not choosing anybody! I'm not here to fall in love and I don't plan on ever doing so."
"But… why were you going after Itachi Uchiha? Come back to the ball, Naruto."
"Kakashi, I can't. I really, really need to talk to him and it has to be now."
"Why now?" pleaded the Prime Minister, "Surely you can't love him that much."
"Look you stupid, pervy rabbit!" the shorter blond spat, jabbing his finger into Kakashi's white clad chest, "There's no way in hell, I'd ever love a man like Itachi! If I do feel anything for the guy, then it's more like hate than anything!"
"That's good," Kakashi said cupping the blond's chin, "Just don't forget. I want you to remember about you and me."
"You and me?" parroted Naruto.
"Don't ever forget," the White Rabbit whispered into the boy's ear as he pulled him into a fierce hug, "I am your treasure. Your precious…"
'W-Wait a sec. Why do I suddenly get the feeling I knew this pervy jerk before coming to this crazy world?' Unbidden, memories of the Sundays he'd spent with Ino came rushing to his mind. 'That's right! I'd spend every Sunday with Ino-nee and Kakashi…'
A wave of dizziness came over the teen and he started to sway, his head suddenly feeling like a heard of elephants started doing the quick step through it.
"Naru-chan!" Kakashi cried, quickly catching the shorter boy before he fell to the palace floor.
"Man my head hurts," Naruto said, holding a hand to his throbbing head.
"I'm a damn fool," Kakashi said, feeling immensely guilty at causing his beloved such pain. "A damn selfish fool. Forgive me, Naru-chan for forcing you to remember. It would be best if you forget for a bit longer."
Elsewhere…
"That's right," the dream demon said, observing the scene through a crystal ball floating before him. "I did warn you Kakashi Hatake. Naruto dear mustn't remember. You must make him forget.
"I'm so, so, sorry, Naru-chan," Kakashi kept repeating over and over as he continued to hold the dazed blond in his arms. "I'm such a heel for making you suffer like this."
'What happened?' Naruto wondered dazedly, 'I… I have the feeling there's something I have to forget.'
'Yes. Forget,' a mysterious voice echoed through the boy's head, 'For now, forget.'
'Ok,' Naruto silently murmured, letting the memories of his previous life fade back into the darkness.
"No matter what anyone else might say, it seems that I will always be right about you," Itachi Uchiha, head of the Hatter family yakuza said, coming upon the two. "You truly have no shame. To behave in such a way in a public hall no less."
"I-Itachi!" sputtered Naruto.
"I'm impressed at how fast you work, cutie."
"I-I'm not that kind of person!" the blond retorted, blushing profusely and squirming in Kakashi's hold.
"Don't let me stop you," jeered the brunet, "I was just getting myself a room."
"This way sir," a faceless maidservant, who seemed to be as embarrassed as Naruto, said, leading the Hatter down the hall.
"You two may want to get a room yourselves," Itachi called back, without sparing a passing glance, "Unless you truly are the type to put on a show."
'Grrr! That's really it this time!' Naruto fumed, 'There's no way I'm gonna let him get away with this!'
"Let me go, Kakashi!" the shorter teen demanded.
"But Naru-chan, didn't you say you hated that man?! Just forget him!"
"Yeah, I hate him. I really hate that guy. He pisses me off and he knows it! I'm going and that's it! Whenever I have a problem with someone, I don't quit until I've faced them. So I'm not gonna stop now, believe it!"
He shoved the silver haired rabbit man away and dashed down the hall after the Hatter. "Naru-chan!" Kakashi shouted, but it was too late, the boy had gone from view. "Just as I feared," the White Rabbit said, his ears drooping, "Even after all those insults, Naru-chan still…"
~TBC~
Sakura: Hooboy! Ita was in rare form tonight! The claws were out full force!
Sasuke: Will you believe me now, onna?
Sakura: Ita's not a monster! You are! What he did, he did for the sake of the village! You just ran off like some emo brat! And for what?! Because some snaky pedo offered you power!
Naruto: Whew! That was harsh!
Sakura: But true!
Pein: Are you still sure you don't want to join?
Sakura: Yep. Appreciate the offer tho'. ^_^ Anyhoo, things are starting to get curiouser and curiouser aren't they? What is it that Kaka-kun wants him to remember? Why does a certain dreamy dream demon want Naruto to forget it? Beats me! You'll just have to wait. I'm riding this wonderful wacky ride along with you minna so I'll be discovering all the craziness that is HnK for the first time like all of you. So I hope you stick around and fasten your seat belts, it's still gonna be a bumpy ride!