Short chapter but theres more to come, thats full of epic-ness :)
Gillian fell asleep after a few minutes. He looked down at her sleeping form. God, she's beautiful. He raised his hand to the side of her cheek to brush away a lock of hair from her face.
This is all so messed up. I don't even know what to do about tomorrow... I still can't believe Zoe cheated. I never thought... I mean she cheated on Rodger but that was with me. I never thought she would... not with me anyway. I'm not even that mad at the fact she cheated. Yes, it hurts like hell but I'm more mad it was with Alec. Alec... He had this gorgeous woman at home, desperately in love with him, and he cheats on her? God, if I see that man again, I swear I will beat the living shit out of him for hurting her. Why am I more mad that Alec cheated then I am that Zoe cheated?
Gillian moaned and wrapped her arms around him tighter, resting her leg between his legs. Cal bit his lip to stop from groaning.
I did the right thing right? By not having sex with her? I mean that's what a good guy would do, isn't it? But that doesn't mean I didn't want to. God, I just wanted to pin her to my bed; make her moan, scream out in ecstasy, call my name...
Gillian rubbed her leg up and down his inner thigh, then relaxed against him with a sigh. Cal felt his pants getting tight again. Crap. Football, football. Gillian shifted again. She was now laying more on top of him. He felt her shirt become more open as she moved and felt her bear breast pressed against his abs. Cal bit his lip harder. Tonight's gonna be long.
He leaned back in his pillow and he finally realized, I told her I love her... Holy shit. I told her I love her. It just slipped out. Maybe she'll think I meant it as a friendly I love you, not the I'm head over in heels in love with you... like I really am... Would it be so bad if she knew? I mean, it's not the best time or how I imagined it, God no, but... it would be that step forward...
What am I saying? She just found out her husband cheated on her with my wife. She doesn't need that much more stress. I just need to face it. I can't tell her all the things I want to say. I can't tell her that ever sense the day I saw her I was blown away... but back then it was different. I knew I couldn't say all the things I had to say. She was married. I was married - well a rocky marriage but a marriage none the less. I still can't tell her now. I've treated her like trash lately. I've been pushing her away because I know I'm no good for her, and she needs to know that. I can't be the man that she needs. The man that's good enough for her. fuck. If she remembers I told her I loved her... I'll just lie the best I can and say 'as a friend'. It's better that way. I'm no good for her. I'm not. I love her so much... but she deserves better then me.
He felt a tear drip from his eye as he held her tighter. He closed his eyes tightly.
Gillian moaned again as she rubbed his chest with her hand. He leaned down and kissed the top of her head. She smelt like lavender and vanilla. He smiled softly. God, I love her. The smell relaxed him as he leaned back and inhaled her deeply as he closed his eyes and drifted to sleep.
TBC... REVIEW!