I HOPE THIS CHAPTER IS BETTER THAN THE LAST ONE.
HOPE YOU ALL ENJOY..
The day had gone perfect, Hanna & Spence were finally here after being delayed a few days because of last minute college interviews for Spencer.
Aria, Noel & Bonnie had picked them up on the way back from being at one of Noel's other relatives on his dad's side for a couple of days.
Today was the first day we were all finally together & ready to spend start an amazing spring break.
I laid in bed now in the middle of the night, with a splitting headache from earlier this evening. Tonight was pretty low key as it was really just us & a couple of the guys from the neighborhood.
Maya & I really didn't drink much, I'm not a big drinker to begin with & Maya seemed a little bit off. I couldn't put my finger on it, but something was up with her.
I had made the mistake of drinking a couple beers tonight & that's why my head was killing me, beer always gave me a headache even if it was just one.
I got up to get some water & that's when I realized that Maya wasn't in bed.
I got up to check if she was in the restroom but the lights were off.
Then I felt the breeze & saw that the doors to the deck were open.
When I walked out the first thing I noticed was the huge full moon & how it reflected off the ocean.
I followed the light til it lead to Maya looking absolutely radiant with the glow of the moon on her face.
She was sitting in the deck-swing, with a blanket wrapped around her, just staring out into the water.
Maya didn't hear when I closed the screen door, nor did she hear me walk up behind her.
At first I thought that there was something that was holding Maya's attention.
But all I could see was the dark water of the ocean.
It was eerie, but beautiful at the same time, or maybe it was just mine & Maya's weird draw to water.
I was wrapped up in the beautiful night & view, that I almost forgot I came out to bring my love back inside.
Gently I tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, causing her to jump slightly.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you"
"It's fine, are you ok"
"I was going to ask you that"
"I'm good now, come here"
Maya pulls me on to her lap, covering me with her blanket, & wrapping me in her arms.
I have never felt safer or more secure than when I was in Maya's arms.
I snuggle into her body more, kissing her neck softly.
"What are you doing out here at 4 am?"
"Thinking"
"About?"
"You, me, Marie, my past, everything"
"No wonder you can't sleep"
We both let out a small laugh
"Nah, I've just been enjoying the view"
"It is beautiful out here"
"Yeah it is, I almost forgot how much I love California"
"That's impossible Cali girl"
"You love this Cali girl though"
"I do"
Maya squeezes me tighter to her chest.
"It reminds me of that morning"
"Mmm, I was thinking that too"
"You know I still think about that night all the time"
"Oh really, what do you think about" she purrs.
"Maya St. Germain is your mind always in the gutter?"
"No!" she affirms.
"Are they good things, you think about?"
"No, they're the best things"
"Cherie, that night, what you gave me. I could never tell you what it meant to me"
"Sinta, aren't you forgetting that you gave me that very same gift" I can feel Maya smile when I call her that.
"I know, but I could've been high or drunk & made a stupid decision, but you, you made a clear choice"
"Maya don't you see that, that makes it all the more special. You could have been careless, but you weren't, you still waited. You were waiting for me just like I was waiting for you. Don't you know by now Maya, we were always meant to be"
"Written in the stars" she whispers under her breath.
"You might want to remember that"
"Emily there's not a day that goes by that I don't remember that. You see that out there Em, that's us"
"What's us"
"This. The moon the water that's us. Em we're like that ocean out there."
"How do you mean"
"Ok, we are Scorpio & Cancer right?"
"Right"
"I know I'm a mess Em, in a lot of different ways. I'm moody&emotional, & those emotions sometimes make me act on pure feeling & impulse, but you Babe, you're calm, steady, you put on your poker face when you need to. You give me the stability I need"
"Ok"
"Just like the ocean Em, the water can seem calm & inviting but can quickly turn you around on your ass"
"Idk if that sounds like a good thing'
"It's not a good thing or a bad thing, it is what it is. Emily to this day you can make me feel like I have a tidal wave of emotions going on with just one look. One of your looks literally feels like you're penetrating my soul. Then with one touch you can either steady me or help keep drowning in you. And I really don't know which I prefer. Do you know what I mean?"
"Like it's as if our love is as deep as that water, & sometimes it can seem quiet on the surface, but there's so many things going on underneath that at any time it can pull you under"
Maya nods absent-mindedly.
"Exactly, Emily you have such a power over me that I even hate sometimes. I react so strongly to anything you do. Like I said before you are the person that calms me & gives me a peace I've never known before, But just as easily you set off this storm that I can't control or even want to for the matter."
"You do the same to me Maya"
"I know that, you just have a better poker face than I do"
"I just think that we're the perfect balance of passion & control"
"And we are, you're as true to your sign as I am to mine. We're both pretty intense in all aspects, but we now when to give & take."
"We've learned how to do that well"
"Yes we have, but"
"But what Maya?"
"It still scares me"
"What does Babe"
"Us"
I raise up from chest & look her in the eyes.
"What scares me Em is the intense love I feel for you, this isn't a high school romance or any other teenage cliché. I love you from the bottom of my soul."
"Maya, I know that fear, because I have it too. Since the first moment I saw you, that was it, I was like a woman on fire, I had to meet you, & after I did I had to make you make you mine, & now that I have you, I have to keep you forever. You are the only person I can share that with because you are feeling the same way."
"Em" Maya whispers. I never want you to think what happened before will ever happen again"
"We don't have to talk about it"
"Yes we do, Em you always say that I saved you, that I helped you, but Cher you literally saved me. I was young when I first started cutting myself, at first just for the rush, then just to take away the pain I was in & replace it with a different kind of pain"
"I'll never hurt you Sinta"
"I know that, Paige did a good job making me think you had"
I can feel Emily's body tense at the mention of Paige's name.
"I really wasn't trying to hurt myself, well not like how everyone thought. I had drank a lot that night, so the bleeding was just crazy, that's when I blacked out. Then the next thing I know you kicked my door down."
I rub my fingers over Maya's scars before kissing them softly. I feel Maya shudder underneath me.
"I looked under the door & I saw blood, what did you think I would do"
"My hero" I kiss Emily's lips.
"Mayaa"
"I'm not making light of the situation Em. I was extremely stupid, but I don't think I would've died"
"Well I wasn't going to take that chance"
"And I never will again either, you never have to worry about that Emily"
Narrator
Emily takes a deep breath & releases it with an almost silent sigh.
Both girls sit there in silence, each thinking about that dreadful night, each recounting their version.
Each trying to shake the memory of what could have been.
Maya is the first to break the silence.
"The sun is gonna come up in a little bit"
"Wow it really is like the night at the boathouse huh?"
Maya kisses the top of Emily's head.
"Minus the making love before though"
"I'm sorry Babe, but my head really was hurting"
"I'm just teasing love. You know what's different though"
"What?"
"You"
"Me!? How is that?"
"That morning when I woke up & you were on the dock with wet hair, I was like damn she just washed me off of her"
"It wasn't you I was washing off though, it was me"
"Yes, but you could've woken me up or told me, not be ashamed about it"
"I wasn't ashamed but I was extremely embarrassed"
"But you shouldn't have been it's natural & happens"
"It didn't happen to you"
"I've been dancing & doing the splits for a lot of years Em, my hymen probably broke on a stage somewhere"
"You're so stupid sometimes you know that" I slap her arm & we both laugh.
"Tell me this, if we were to make love right now & you would bleed a little, would you freak out & run in the shower & not want to talk to me?"
"I did not freak out & not want to talk to you"
"You did, now answer the question"
"I would still run in the shower but not 'freak out' I'd take you with me"
"See that's what I mean, you're more confident now"
"I've had a good teacher"
Maya rolls her eyes "Confidence is sexy on you, but I do miss adorably shy Emily sometimes"
"Trust me she's still here. My, I was scared something was wrong with me that's why I didn't wake you, but when you held me in your arms on that dock after the love we had just made I knew I was home, I was safe & wanted, & loved, & I have felt that everyday in your arms since then"
Just then the sun starts to break through the horizon.
The once dark sky is burning off & is starting to give way to the golden sun.
The black is transitioning to purple to blue to yellow. until the the last of the dark clouds have lifted.
Crystal blue water now visible.
Emily stands up & walks over to the railing of the deck leaning against it, looking out to the ocean.
Slender but toned arms wrap around her waist, as she leans into her lovers embrace.
"That is us Maya, you are right. You're the ever changing moon & even though it's sometimes hard to keep up you guide me & pull me like the tide. I know I'm no picnic either & sometimes I hurt your feelings unintentionally you're always there ready to shower me with affection or give me my space. Thank you"
"For what?"
"For always having my back"
"Thank you for always having mine"
"I love you Maya'
"I love you too Emily"
They share a gentle kiss, not needing to express anything further.
"Sleep?"
"Sleep"
I HOPE YOU LIKED THIS CHAPTER.
IF YOU HAVE ANY IDEAS OR SOMETHING YOU'D LIKE TO SEE FEEL FREE TO SHARE.
SINTA - IS AN OLD FILIPINO SAYING MEANING DARLING OR MY LOVE, IT'S NOT REALLY USED ANYMORE BUT I THOUGHT THAT WOULD MAKE IT CUTE.