14. I Hate School

Harry could clearly see how excited Hermione was. Even though she seemed to be trying to hide it, for some reason. They were going back to Hogwarts, after all. It would be weird if she wasn't excited.

"When we were in fifth year, the meeting just comprised of the introductions and a list of the basic duties and a reminder to carefully go through the rules, and also the schedule for the patrols on the train and the next few nights. Don't worry. I already have it prepared. I've kept the next meeting on Tuesday as by then, every prefect should have their schedules and we can decide which days are more comfortable for whom. Do you want to say something to them?"

"Uh, no… Not really."

"Fine. It's fine today, but I'm not always going to let you just hang back and let me do all the work, ok?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"They made you head boy for a reason."

"Of course." Harry said, looking out the window.

"Harry! I mean it. All the students will respect you and will look up to you. Just imagine the younger ones. They're all going to grow up wanting to be like you," she told him, making him groan and close his eyes.

"Really Harry, enough with the dramatics. You know you deserved it."

"I wasn't even a prefect."

"But you should have been. And you do remember, right? Your father wasn't a prefect either and he became Head Boy."

There it was again. It was something that had started to bug Harry quite often recently. Another similarity between him and his father. Although that wasn't exactly what bugged him. It was the similarities between his mother and Hermione. If his parents were made for each other, then… Argh!

Also, he had recently wondered what his parents would think of Tonks and Hermione.

Hermione… Well, he was sure that they would think of her as perfect. A genius, gorgeous, sincere, caring girl who somehow became his best friend. Yes, he was sure they would love her.

Tonks… Was an auror, clumsy, fun, wild, and she made him so happy (most of the time). He guessed that his parents would have liked Tonks, but would have some reservations about their relationship, secretly hoping that he and Hermione would get together, at least his mother probably would. His father would probably be a little jealous and proud of him for having a metamorphmagus as his girlfriend, and yet, he would probably want Hermione in his family too because maybe she would be as good for his son as Lily was for him. Although, Harry supposed he didn't need the good influence as much as his father had. 'Sorry, dad.'

Tonks' parents, the Tonks, were nice. He liked them. But he didn't know them well enough to know what they honestly thought of him.

He wondered what exactly Hermione's parents thought about him. Her mother… Well, he didn't really have to wonder. But her father… He did like him. He thought of Harry as a future sport star. He wasn't sure if Dan totally approved of him as a partner for his daughter, but he was sure he was thought of in a better tone than Ron.

He wondered if his parents would have been friends with the Tonks or the Grangers. He could see them all hanging out, even without their children together. All of them with one kid, or maybe he would have had a brother or sister, who knows? What would his sister's name be? … Rose? Yep! Another flower. Maybe Rosalie Something Potter! That sounded nice.

"What?" Hermione asked on seeing his smirk.

Harry answered after a brief puzzled pause, "Nothing!"

She gave him a curious look but said nothing. Over the next few minutes, the train slowly filled up. Some people gave Harry a wave and a smile when they saw him through the window. A few just stared shamelessly. As expected, the train was about to leave when a group of red haired people finally made it to the platform, with Molly leading her youngest son and daughter. Harry and Hermione hurried outside to give her a goodbye hug as well before getting back to the compartment.

"So, you ready?" Hermione asked Harry when the train started to move.

Harry suddenly remembered sitting in a little boat with Ron and Hermione, staring up in awe at the wondrous castle that was Hogwarts, remembered that enchanted ceiling, those moving stairs, those boring classrooms, the common room, the food, the quidditch pitch, and smiled.

"I'm ready."

Patrolling the halls seemed fairly pointless to Harry, since he had the Marauders' Map. Tonight was his first scheduled patrol and he had spent most of it checking the secret passages he was aware of, occasionally checking the map for any students far enough away from their dorms to warrant his attention. Unfortunately, barring another way out through the Room of Requirement, which he made a mental note to check the next day, his only way to sneak out of Hogwarts by land seemed through the Shrieking Shack. And he wasn't even sure about that. After wandering around the empty halls for some time, taking note of a few places that seemed a bit new to him, Harry decided to return to the Gryffindor room. Choosing to take another look at the map to see if he could somehow be of any use anywhere nearby, he opened it up to find nearly all the names filling up the dormitories, while a few remained in the common room, although he seemed to be the only one outside in the room's general vicinity.

Ron and Hermione were both inside the common room, Ron's name overlapping Hermione's. Harry stared at it for a few seconds, and then remembering to breathe, he closed the map and decided to take another walk.

He remembered Tonks, dearly wishing that he could have her beside him at that moment. He missed her. He felt alone, cheated somehow. It seemed unfair. For months, she had been the one thing on his mind, keeping thoughts of her at bay. But now… When he had to spend all this time in Ron and Hermione's company, she couldn't be there. And he was all alone with his thoughts. Thoughts that until a few days ago, he believed he was finally rid of. And despite being the victim of these thoughts, he felt guilty for being the criminal here as well.

He wondered what she was doing now. Maybe she was lying awake thinking about him, and what things would be like between them from now on. He wanted to be with her. Not even necessarily doing anything. Just… Being together. On her bed. He liked her bed.

For a few minutes, Harry sat in an open classroom, staring blankly out at the stars, until he worked up the courage to go back to the common room. If they happened to still be…

He sighed. He would have to bear it. They were a couple. They were going to do things together. He had to deal with it. Nothing he could do about it. Unless… No, he decided, he shouldn't even think about it, at all.

Hermione's voice echoed in his head. "He needed to work on his jealousy." Or did she say, "He had to work on his jealousy."

The Hermione in his mind decided it didn't really matter. He needed to, and he had to.

Harry decided to write a letter to Tonks, right then. That was a good thing to think about. A good way to take his mind off Hermione. Maybe he should wait until morning to send it though. Perhaps she would send him something and he could just send the letter back with the same owl.

But… What would she write to him about? …

'Hello. I miss you. Nothing we can do about it, though. Unless you find a way to sneak out of school. But no, concentrate on your studies. They're far more important than me.'

'Your house is great. My apartment's better for me though.'

'My parents are doing good. Although you shouldn't care about them.'

'Don't think about Hermione.' No, she wouldn't say that. Not that she would say the other things he had been thinking about. But he hoped she could give him a way to spend less of his time thinking about Hermione. Maybe he should be upfront and just ask her himself.

'I love you. But you know that other girl I've been in love with for years whom we thought I wasn't in love with anymore? Well, we thought wrong. Help!'

He sighed and rubbed his eyes. He felt sorry for Tonks. She deserved so much better than him. And she deserved so much better from him. It was weird. He had such a great time with her, almost always, and a lot of the time he spent with Hermione these days was spent in self-loathing and discomfort. Yet, for some reason, his brain refused to learn (as it probably would continue to while it was stuck in school, he thought ironically).

So what could he say to her? The things he truly wanted to write, he believed he shouldn't. And the things that he felt like he should write as a good boyfriend seemed too meaningless. And he wasn't even sure if those were things that he should write to Tonks, because he wasn't sure how she would react anymore. At least, when he was with her, before saying anything, he could check if the moment felt right. Even then, he had been quite wrong recently. But a letter was even more impersonal. N0w he just hoped that she wouldn't truly mind too much if he sneaked out of Hogwarts for a few hours.

"Mr. Potter, if you were unaware of the meaning of the term 'patrol', you should've simply asked. I'm sure Miss Granger would have been happy to educate you."

Harry sheepishly apologized after getting off the desk. Professor McGonagall silently turned to make Harry start walking beside her towards his common room.

"You do realise, Mr. Potter, that you were made Head Boy, not because of your past accolades, but because the entire student body looks up to you."

"Yes ma'am."

"And that means that the examples set by you will inspire hundreds of your juniors."

"Yes ma'am."

"Now do you believe students should think of the classroom as a place to rest and stare at stars?"

"Uh, no ma'am."

McGonagall quickly hid her smirk when Harry looked up.

"Good … How have your classes been?"

"Uhhh… They're going well."

"What do you think about Professor Thompson?"

"He seems to be quite knowledgeable," Harry replied after a few seconds.

McGonagall nodded and asked, "And Professor Banks?"

"I haven't heard much about her classes."

"Then talk to the first to fourth year students, of all houses, and get their general impressions of her from them, delegate the job to the prefects if you wish. I would like to help her with the subject, it can be quite daunting to teach. However I don't think that my presence in her classroom would let her teach as she normally would. But the quality of the teaching at Hogwarts must be maintained, or rather, brought back up to a high level. I'm sure you agree."

"Uhhh… I guess, in some ways, yes ma'am."

"Then I expect a report from you about any problems the students might be having with her by next week."

"Yes ma'am."

"Also, don't be afraid to come to me about any problem you yourself might have, no matter how small or big. Is that understood... Mr. Potter?"

"Yes, ma'am." Harry told her with a smile.

They were almost at the Fat Lady's portrait when she asked, "Will you be playing for the house team this year?"

"Yes, of course, ma'am."

"Okay," McGonagall said, trying to hide her smile.

"Don't worry, ma'am. I will keep your favoritism a secret." Harry told her cheekily before giving the Fat Lady the password.

"Careful, Mr. Potter. Do not - MISS GRANGER! WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU DOING?"

"I still don't see what we were doing wrong."

"Would you shut -" Harry tried to say.

"Quiet," Hermione admonished them both.

"I'm just telling him to shut up."

"Shhh!"

"Oh come on," Harry said, shaking his head.

"Ahhh Mr. Potter, what are you giving me today?" Slughorn said, coming to their table a few minutes later.

"Uh, as you can see, nothing spectacular, Professor."

"Harry my boy, how many times must I tell you? You keep selling yourself short. You can be an excellent potioneer. You just need to believe in yourself a little more."

"Yes sir."

"Ah, Miss Granger? … Looks wonderful. Well done. … Mr. Weasley, oh dear." Slughorn finished, walking away with the look of a person who had just fallen head first into a basket of dirty old socks and then proceeded to take a deep breath.

"'Looks wonderful, Well done!' Seriously, what is it with him?" Hermione complained as soon as they were outside.

"Huh?"

"What are you talking about?" Harry asked.

"If you had shown him that same potion, he would've been like 'Oh my! I have never seen such a perfect potion in all my time as a professor.' With me, it's like, 'Oh well, pretty good! But who cares?' It's so wrong."

"She's gone, mate." Ron said, sharing a disbelieving look with Harry.

"Yeah," he shot back.

Hermione proceeded to give Harry a glare, making him sigh. She had been a bit short with him ever since he had walked McGonagall right into the middle of the Head Girl's snog fest in the middle of the common room, which even mostly empty, didn't strike the Headmistress as a particularly good place for such displays of affection. Or maybe she was talking about the school and not the common room, Harry wondered.

"Well alright then, I'll see you guys later," Harry told them a little later.

"Where are you off to?"

"Uhhh… I don't know." Harry answered a few feet later.

"What did he say?" Ron asked Hermione, who just shrugged, holding herself from calling out to his retreating back.

"Oh hey guys," Harry said, quickly walking past Ron and Hermione in the common room and running up to his dorm to get his broom and cloak.

Running back down, he gave Hermione a smile as goodbye, and moved out quickly.

Thankfully, the Astronomy tower was empty and he was able to avoid running into any students on the way thanks to his map. Once there, he had the vivid memory of Dumbledore getting hit and falling off.

He carefully adorned his invisibility cloak and then set off into the evening sky, hoping that no one would see and find a broom flying by itself to be a strange sight, or at least that no one would link it to him, although they might. Many people in the common room had, after all, seen him taking it out. Oh well.

Soon, he landed in Hogsmeade, and after taking a few deep breaths to ready himself, apparated to a spot near Tonks' place.

"Please be home, please be home, please be home." Harry prayed before steeling himself and knocking on her door.

Tonks opened the door and confusedly looked around.

Harry just stared at her. He had forgotten how many things he had come to love about her. The shape of her face, the angle of the tip of her nose, her upper lip, her lower lip, her hair, which were a soft brown at the moment, the sound of her burp which made him laugh, the way she looked when she had just figured something great out. He soon found some new things to love about her as well. The way she could somehow stare right into his eyes despite his invisibility (how the hell?). How she could somehow make her punches feel good (kinda). The way she crept inside his cloak instead of taking it off.

And of course, he loved her lips.

"What took you so long?" He heard her ask after what felt like twenty seconds.

"Oh nothing, just the traffic was horrible."

"Haha. You idiot ... I missed you so much."

He just kissed her again.

"How'd you sneak out?"

"I flew."

"All the way?" Tonks asked with a weird look.

"Sure, if that sounds more romantic."

"More idiotic than romantic."

"Well, I'm an idiot for you? No?"

"No. No. Hehe … How long can you stay?"

Harry sighed, suddenly remembering where he had to go and what awaited him there.

"Not long at all. Come with me."

"I wish I could."

"Seriously. It's horrible without you. Just… Come and stay hidden in my bed. Or... Oh oh oh, how about the Room of Requirement?"

"I'm sorry, Harry. I wish we could do something. I really do. The past few days? They've been hell for me too. I don't even feel like coming home from work."

"At least you were home today."

"You really should have sent me a letter first. It was lucky I was home."

"Yeah, but I wanted to surprise you. And actually, I tried to write one, but it's like… The words didn't feel sufficient. Do you know what I mean?"

"Yes, my vocabulary's horrible too." Tonks told him with a grin.

"Hah, not that, idiot. But I will try to write from now on. I don't know how often I can come though."

"Don't worry about it. Just don't you dare let it affect your studies, okay? I don't care if you're gonna be a quidditch star. I still want you to get grade greats."

"Yes ma'am. I will get grade greats."

"Aaah. Great Grades. There. And I'll try to write too."

"Good. Now where are all my clothes?"

A/N :

Ello!

Ok bye!