A/N Thanks a lot to everyone who has reviewed, favorited and followed this story!
L: BambiLuran does not own Death Note.
After classes today, I went back to my room and took a nap. I was awakened by yelling. I opened my eyes slowly to see a very angry Mello being hit repeatedly with Mrs. Clark's purse.
"You crazy old lady!"
"You boys were supposed to come mow my lawn and feed the chickens! Feed them!"
"Why do you have chickens?!"
"Don't question my purchases!"
"Ow! Stop!"
"I'll stop when I'm good and ready!"...Maybe I should stop this...or just go back to sle-
BOOM!
I hadn't had the chance to complete my thought when I was hit upside the head with Mrs. Clark's purse.
"Get up, Matthew!"
"It's Matt, not Matthew..." She hit me again. Mello stepped between us.
"Okay lady. That's enou-" She knocked Mello out. His body made a thud noise as it hit the ground...
"Mels? Dude? You okay, man? It's not nap time, get up." I pushed his arm with my foot. He made no movement.
"Unless you wanna join your friend, you better get down that street and feed those hungry chickens."...How do you feed chickens anyway?
As we were walking down the street, Mrs. Clark nagged me the whole way.
"That young man's leather is too tight."
"All those video games are bad for your eyes."
"I don't like your goggles."
"Your shirt looks stupid."
"...Your face does too."
"Does this look infected to you?"
These are just a few examples of what came out of her mouth. When we got to her door, she turned to me.
"Okay, before we go in, I have to lay out some rules. Don't touch anything, I don't care for your dirt. Don't look at anything. Don't breathe on anything. Okay, let's go in now." So...basically I can't do anything but walk in...and stand there. When we got in, I just stood there, staring at her. She growled and hit me with her purse.
"I SAID FEED THE CHICKENS." She pushed me down some steps and into the backyard. As far as I could see, there were no chickens...While I was spinning around, something caught my eye. I spun back around and saw what it was...
"Amanda?" I asked, staring at the girl.
"Hey, what's up Uncle Steve?"
"AMANDA! DON'T TALK TO THAT FILTHY CHILD!" Mrs. Clark yelled from a window. I sighed. Amanda rolled her eyes.
"SHUT YOUR FACE OLD LADY!" Amanda yelled. What exactly is going on here?...
I don't really care...I just wanna go play Mega Zombie Crusher 4.
"Stupid OCs..." I muttered.
Light: You can't just break the fourth wall like that.
Matt: Why?
Light: How often do you see me breaking the fourth wall?
Matt: First of all, that sentence broke the fourth wall. Second, you're not exactly a good role model.
Light: Hey! I'm over here trying to create a new world free from evil.
Matt: How's that working out for you?
Light: Meh.
"Amanda! Is he feeding the chickens?!"
"You don't have any chickens, Grandma!"
"YES I DO!"
"NO YOU DON'T!" After that, Mrs. Clark came out and forced me to feed her nonexsistent chickens. After having a three way staring competition for about an hour, she released me. I ran to my room happily. Mello was on his bed, reading a book...I'm fairly certain he had been knocked out...
Mello: Ha! I'm alive!
Light: Yeah...you survived an old lady ass kicking...
"You okay now, Mello?" I asked. He nodded.
"Yeah. I faked the whole thing." I blinked.
"Okay, but next time it's my turn."
"'Kay, sure."
THE NEXT DAY
So after classes today, Mello and I went chocolate shopping. It didn't go well. Mello got into an argument with a guy at the candy shop. The guy said said that licorcice was better than chocolate...I think you all can probably guess what happened.
But for those of you who can't, I shall have a flashback just for you.
I could tell Mello was about to embarrass me again. He's the reason we change candy shops every other week.
"Oh heeeeeell no!" Mello said.
"Oh heeeeeeell yeeeeeees!" The guy said. I sighed and payed for the cart full of chocolate. Once it was payed for, the cashier and I turned to watch the argument.
"Oh heeeell no! You can't just say licorice is better than chocolate! CHOCOLATE IS THE BEST!"
"LICORICE!"
"I SAID CHOCOLATE!"
"YOU AIN'T RUNNIN' NOTHIN' UP IN HERE!"
"I'M RUNNIN' THIS WHOLE OPERATION, SON!"
"YOU NEED TO RUN YOUR FAT SELF ON A TREADMILL!"
"I'M NOT FAT!"
"FAT MAN!"
"I ALREADY TOLD YOU! I'M NOT FAT!"
"THEN WHY ARE YOUR CLOTHES SO TIGHT?!"
"...That's the way I bought them..."
"NO! IT'S BECAUSE YOUR FAT! FAT, FAT, FATTY, FAT!"
"I'M NOT FAAAAAAT!" Mello screeched and attacked the poor guy. The cashier and I tried to break them up, but Mello had latched onto the man's hair and refused to let go. This is why you don't argue with chocoholics in a candy shop. When we finally lifted Mello off of him, the guy had some bald spots and Mello had two fistfulls of hair. This is why I can't take him anywhere.
Mello: What do you mean you can't take me anywhere?
Matt: Umm...
Matsuda: I think he's talking about how we all went to lunch last week.
Mello: YOU WENT WHERE?!*angry*
Matt: Matsuda, you idiot!
L: Mello would have liked it. There was delicious chocolate.
Mello:*really angry**glares at Matt*
Matt: Thanks a lot, L.
"Matthew! Mello! You're late again!" Mrs. Clark ran in the dining hall while we were eating dinner. The crazy woman hit me with her purse. People were staring.
"GET UP AND TEACH MARIE TO SING!"
"WHO'S MARIE?!" Mello yelled at her. She hit him in the head.
"MARIE IS MY CHICKEN!"
"What the hell are you talking about?!" Mello yelled. She hit him again.
"WATCH YOUR MOUTH! WHAT WOULD YOUR MOTHER SAY?!"
"I DON'T KNOW! GO FIND HER AND ASK HER!" While they were arguing, I took the opportunity to sneak out of the dining hall and hide in Near's room. I pushed everything out of his toybox and jumped in. I heard the door open a while later. I peeked out and saw Near looking confusedly at his toys. He started walking toward the toybox...Maybe if I stay REALLY still he won't see me...
He opened the toybox, sighed, and closed it again.
"Are you hiding from that crazy woman?" He asked.
"Yeah. Do me a favor and don't tell Mello, kay?"
"Yeah ok, Matt."
L: Review...
Misa: Misa wanted to say that!
Matt: Why do you talk like that?
Misa: Like what?
Matt: Like this. *imitates Misa's voice* OMG MISA MISA LOVES LIGHT! OMG MISA LIKES THAT! OMG MISA EATS CINNAMON!
Mello: That last one was really random...
Misa: Misa does not talk like that!
Matt: YES MISA DOES!
Misa: Don't yell at Misa!
Matt: 'Kay I'm sorry.
Misa: Misa forgives Matty.
Mello:...Review, favorite, follow...all that good stuff. *smile*