That day Sam quickly realized it had been a bad decision to stay on the base. He had been torn between returning home and getting what candy he could from his parents or staying for his best friend, the latter eventually winning out. It wasn't until lunchtime in the cafeteria that a lot of people reminded him of what had happened the night before, much to his embarrassment and horror. He had known deep inside that the Megatron's and Startscream's had to be fake, but he had still panicked and nearly purged his tanks, as the Cybertronians would call it, after the fake Megatron had asked him to join in their fake sexcapades.
He glared moodily at Epps when the older man kept bringing it up just to annoy him. It was working perfectly and it didn't help that he had the worst headache from the alcohol he had drank the night before. He cursed his best human friend for being smart enough to forgo participating in any of it, wondering just where he had disappeared to when Bumblebee and Barricade joined Sam, Epps, and Mikaela at their table. The teen was slightly happy to note that Barricade looked as miserable as he felt, causing him to ask his Guardian if Cybertronians could get hangovers in the first place.
"It depends on the amount of high grade they've taken in," Bumblebee replied.
Sam looked harder at the Scout, noticing that he, too, looked a bit worse for wear. Even his holoform wasn't up to its usual perfect state, both Barricade and Bumblebee looking a little faded and just altogether nonexistent, clothes as plain as they could make them. It made him wonder if they'd both opted for a hologram instead.
"Ironhide's probably in an extremely bad mood right now, then." Mikaela remarked with a giggle.
Epps snorted, "Good thing we hid all of his ammo then!"
"That'll just make his mood worse," Sam pointed out. "And he already knows it was you who made him into a pumpkin. Miles even ratted out Jazz and Will, too."
"Oh…" Epps softly replied, only just realizing how true that was. "Well, slag."
Bumblebee laughed, "That about sums it up just right, Epps."
About that time Will came into the cafeteria, walking over to their table with an unnerved look. He stopped directly beside Epps.
"We have to wash the paint off Hide like now if we want to survive. I don't know what he's having Jazz do and I don't want to know, I just know I don't want to be doing it, too." The Captain said this more to the table at large, already pulling Epps out of his seat by his shirt collar and leading the Sergeant out of the cafeteria.
"Still think we should have somehow convinced Hide to dress up as the tooth fairy," Sam sighed wistfully.
"When Annabelle gets old enough we can have her help," Bumblebee replied with a smirk.
Barricade gave a small snort, "Oh, how the mighty have fallen to puny organics."
"Oh, like you're one to talk!" Bumblebee rolled his eyes, "Where's your kitty, hmm?"
"How should I know?" Barricade growled, "He's not actually my pet."
"Oh, I wouldn't say pet. You two were much too close last night for that to be true," Bumblebee said in a sing-song voice. "Dare say it you might actually be starting to show that you like him as a friend!"
That really set Barricade off, and Sam watched for a few minutes as the two sniped back and forth at each other. With both of them feeling slightly off it was no wonder they went at each other's throats so easily, though it annoyed him greatly to be a witness to it. The drinking had been Bumblebee's idea after all, and maybe it was because Barricade really did blame him for feeling bad that he was so ready to get mad at him or anything he might say. He was oddly grateful that Miles had up and disappeared after breakfast now, the last thing he wanted was for his friend to end up being hurt because Bumblebee couldn't stop himself from teasing Barricade and Barricade was too much of a child to admit that he could like organics, let alone Autobots.
Sighing heavily, the teen got up with Mikaela, and the two of them tossed the remainder of their food away before leaving the cafeteria and the arguing mechs behind. They decided to go to the med-bay, thinking that Miles may have been there because of his predicament or that they could at least find out what the medic had done to Sunstreaker and Sideswipe. Earlier that day the CMO had declared a mech hunt on the two and no one or 'bot had seen anything of them since.
"Found Sunny or Sides, yet?" Sam asked, stepping in to the med-bay while holding the door for Mikaela.
Only Ratchet and Wheeljack were in the med-bay, the place looking like a tornado had ripped through it. Which, when involving the twins, was entirely possible.
"No." Ratchet glared at them suspiciously, as if they may know where the two Frontliners were. "You two have now been assigned to help."
"Let me guess, Sunny and Sides?" Mikaela asked, stepping over a random data-pad on the floor.
Ratchet grumbled something under his breath in Cybertronian, nodding slightly to confirm the answer to Mikaela's question.
Sam whistled, "Daaaamn. They're so going to wish they were in the pit once they're found."
Mikaela laughed and Wheeljack nodded, causing Ratchet to throw a wrench at the poor inventor. The two teenagers got to work helping Ratchet clean up and reorganize what they could while Wheeljack worked on whatever Ratchet wanted him to work on, threatening him with wrenches if he complained about mistreatment by medics.
Sam groaned and put his face in his hands in a despairing motion. He was once again in the cafeteria, returning to it with Mikaela for dinner. Sam was sitting by Mikaela, dreading the moment that Miles might appear. It was surprisingly quiet in the room despite all the people, and the occasional Cybertronian in holoform. This was only because Bumblebee and Barricade had continued to fight, and it was steadily escalating in words and in pitch. There were the brave few who were whispering, either unperturbed by the argument or just not caring. Neither teen had spent much time with the Scout and the Decepticon Neutral, but Bumblebee had been keeping Sam updated on the fight through texts.
The Scout had found a large nerve and had set out to completely rip it to shreds, Barricade doing what he did best and getting angry and defensive. Bumblebee wanted the stubborn 'con to admit that he did like Miles as more than just a 'useful organic', that he actually thought as the teen as a friend and perhaps even a Charge, but Barricade was just too stubborn. It didn't help that Bumblebee had been attacking him in front of humans and Autobots alike, Barricade feeling trapped and threatened at seeming weak in front of so many.
Sam knew it was more than just the fight. It was weeks of tension between the two coming to a head, because while they had been playing nice so well it had been at a cost and it was hard to wipe away years of being enemies. And now it was just the fact of the matter. They had started arguing about something and both were too stubborn to stop until the other one did, so that meant it just never stopped.
"Just admit it you stubborn scrap heap!" Bumblebee snapped, Barricade having managed to snap his last thread of patience on the topic and moved him from attempting to keep them at a normal level to outright yelling.
Barricade snarled, "There's nothing to admit, you stupid Autodolt! He's just a convenience!"
Mikaela glared at Barricade, looking about ready to yell at the 'con until Sam stopped her, shaking his head. Neither saw Miles and Prowl come into the cafeteria, but both soon caught on to the sudden hush in the cafeteria as everyone but Bumblebee and Barricade shut up now. They just thought it was because Bumblebee had raised his voice.
Bumblebee and Barricade kept fighting, holoforms up and out of their seats and leaning across the table to glare at each other as they went back and forth. Miles and Prowl watched this in silence, the teenager not sure how to feel even as it quickly became obvious that he was part of what they were fighting over and the SIC just annoyed at the illogical behavior of the two Cybertronians and the scene they were causing in the middle of the cafeteria.
Mikaela decided to ignore Sam after awhile more of watching the fight. "Would you two idiots stop it? Miles could come in at any minute! This is the cafeteria for God's sake!"
"You're so slagging ridiculous!" Bumblebee actually growled as he ignored Mikaela, "You're basically already his Guardian!"
Mikaela opened her mouth to retort, but heard a gasp from Sam and looked at him to see his gaze elsewhere. She followed the look to see what had made him react like that, only to see Miles and Prowl. She desperately tried to get Barricade's attention to stop him from replying, but she was too late.
"Get it through that thick metal plating of yours, Autobot! I'm not his Guardian, I'm not his friend! Pit, I like Blurr better than him and that mech would sooner kill me then look me in the optics!" Barricade snarled, "He was just a convenience in the time I needed one, I wouldn't even call him a socket! It's hardly my fault that I'm forced to continue to associate with him here because he's friends with your own precious organic, I would have preferred to drop all contact with him when I came here! I would never want to be his Guardian!"
"Oh, good." Prowl allowed his voice to travel across the already nearly silent cafeteria. "I was already considering taking Miles on as my Charge, this just cements my decision."
Barricade and Bumblebee turned in unison to glare at Prowl, even the Scout about ready to tell him off for cutting into their fight, when they noticed Miles standing just a bit in front of the SIC. Bumblebee felt almost immediately guilty as he looked at the teen, opening his mouth to say something before deciding against it. He glanced warily at Barricade, noticing the 'con seemed to be just as shocked as he was by their appearance. Both had been too invested in their fight to pay much attention to their surroundings.
The teen was trying his best to keep a straight face, to show that he didn't care, and that made the Scout feel even worse. Wheeljack really had done an incredible job with the implants, the ears giving the teen away immediately as they were laying flat against his skull and hair lining his tail seemed to be puffed up.
"I trust you two sparklings will find somewhere more suitable to fight now that the question of his Guardianship can no longer be put upon Barricade?" Prowl asked dryly, shaming both of them with one simple question. Then, when neither replied, he glared at them both. "Well?"
"Yes, Prowl." Bumblebee muttered lowly, feeling as if he was nothing more than a sparkling again and getting in trouble for doing something stupid.
"Excellent," Prowl replied. He then turned Miles around and pushed the teen out of the cafeteria quickly.
Once they were out of the cafeteria, Prowl let his holoform disappear, quickly picking Miles up before he could say anything. The teen stayed silent as the Tactician walked them to one of the only vending machines still on the base. He was set down in front of it carefully.
"You're not serious, right?" Miles asked, giving Prowl an incredulous look. "Sam and I pigged out on so much junk food last night that Bumblebee threatened us."
"Bumblebee has a bit more to be concerning himself with right now then what you decide to gorge yourself on," Prowl replied, although he still glanced around for Ratchet. "This way you won't need to get food from the cafeteria while those overgrown sparklings are still inside of it."
Miles shrugged, "Can't say I'm going to out right refuse junk food as long as the Hatchet isn't around."
He dug in his pockets for his wallet, then fed the machine his money. Glancing over the available selections he quickly chose a bag of Cheetos, retrieving it and leaning against a wall as he opened the bag and began to eat it. He wasn't going to subject Prowl to crumbs of cheesy goodness.
"I honestly have to say I am surprised over how they acted," Prowl said after a few minutes, watching Miles crumble up the empty bag and toss it in a trash can.
"Even you walking super computers can say stupid things that you don't mean every once in awhile," Miles responded, wiping his hands on his pants. "Probably."
"Even if you think he didn't mean it, it still has to…" Prowl trailed off, picking Miles up. Cybertronians and humans may be similar emotionally, but that didn't know he meant how to deal with one if they were upset.
"Hurt?" Miles filled in, then gave a small snort. "Yeah, but Barry can be an ass. Doesn't mean I'm just going to forgive him, though. Cuz mark my words, that fucker's gonna realize he needs me."
Prowl gave a thoughtful hum, "It will be hard to prove that when you will both be on base and largely in the same social circles. Luckily, you'll be sticking with me for the most part, anyway.
"Does that mean I can cheer myself up by tripping your glitch?" Miles asked, though the usual grin wasn't in place. He allowed Prowl to pick him up and set him on his shoulder.
Prowl vented softly, "No."
"Aw, but it'd make me happy!" Miles whined, but this got him no response. He huffed, "So what's this about the Guardian thing?"
"What do you mean?" Prowl asked, glancing at the teenager on his shoulder in confusion.
"Well I always thought it was just a Bee 'n Hide thing because they had actually been with Sam and Will in battle, or something, and like maybe they had defended them?" Miles replied, "No one ever actually explained it to me."
"Certainly not." Prowl paused, thinking it over. "In the English language there is two meanings to guardian. Like your parents would be your legal guardians, and then the act of actually guarding someone. That is the closest thing we could get to what our guardian means."
"Okaaay, bit more explanation needed there."
Prowl vented softly, "It is a relationship between one Cybertronian and then one non-Cybertronian, like Sam and Bumblebee. Through it the charge would become… an honorary Cybertronian, you could say. This way the Guardian wouldn't normally have to worry about the fuss of the other species over their chosen. With your government it helps give us a little bit more lee way with you civilians, which is one reason I plan on telling Optimus I'll become your Guardian. Most Guardians will risk their lives for their Charges, a deep bond usually needing to be in place for a non-Cybertronian to be honored in such a way. It is meant to show how close a Cybertronian is to a person of a non-Cybertronian species as we can not properly bond with another species."
"So it's like a combination of the two English uses?" Miles asked, snorting. "You stupid computers are too confusing."
"The Guardian can take precedence over others concerning the Charge," Prowl continued, ignoring Miles. "Even some of their higher ups. Like Bumblebee would take precedence over me concerning Sam, and I wouldn't have a say if he wanted to take Sam somewhere that I didn't agree with. However, Optimus Prime and Ratchet would be able to tell him no."
"This sounds a bit like…" Miles trailed off, sure Prowl would understand.
"Most Cybertronians, like Bumblebee, let the Charge have a large say in their relationship. In fact, being the Charge of a Cybertronian is a respected position, immediately earning the respect of most mechs and femmes by what it could mean. A Cybertronian pet, or slave, is a…" He hesitated a moment, remembering Barricade had used the word. "A socket."
"Oh." Miles replied, then paused. "Oh." He repeated as he remembered where he had heard it.
Prowl nodded, deciding that path didn't need to be gone down just yet. "Some other reasons I would like to be your guardian are that I do need to get better acquainted with this planet and you can explain anything I don't understand. We'll be spending a lot of time together because of this new alliance anyway, so people will just chalk it up to us being a new bonded pair. Out of all the humans I've spent the most time with you, and if anything you help me with my glitch because I have to adjust to how illogical you can be."
"If you want to sign yourself up for your early demise, be my guest, Prowler." Miles said, grinning. "But don't use bonded pair again. Sounds like we're dating or something."
"I'll try not to." He said dryly, narrowing his optics.
It was surprisingly easy to start their plan against the twins after Prowl told Optimus that he would be Miles' Guardian. The Prime had no reason to disagree, especially not when the reason he would have previously had disappeared that day when he was told about the argument Barricade and Bumblebee had gotten into. He figured that his SIC had his own reasons, but Miles was fine with it, so he didn't care all that much. It had also been surprisingly easy for Miles to avoid Barricade. This was mainly because Barricade was also trying to avoid the teen, leading the mech to essentially go back into hiding in his hangar. Bumblebee gave the teen a sincere apology, though he still got chewed out quite thoroughly by Mikaela and Sam for being so stupid.
When Prowl innocently suggested having a military camping trip to teach Miles how to survive out in the wild, as well as Sam if he wanted, the suggestion was taken and looked at. It was decided that the suggestion would be done, especially when Bumblebee had said something about seeing if he could get the school to let the teen's off the hook for a little bit since it was technically a learning expenditure. Miles would need all the relief he could from school since he could only do so much of the work while not there.
Optimus wanted two extra mechs to go along with them for safety measures, deciding that something akin to pulling names out of a hat was the fairest way to do it. He didn't know that Prowl then rigged it so Sunstreaker and Sideswipe would be the mechs selected to go. While Sam had opted out of the camping trip, mainly so he could try to talk to Barricade, Will and Ironhide had decided to go on it as well.
On the days leading up to the camping trip, Miles and Prowl planned and gathered supplies. Prowl would be going a day ahead of time to search the area for anything significantly dangerous, like Decepticons, and would be setting up the beginnings of the plan. They had to find a forest far enough away where all the trees would be taller than the Cybertronians that were going.
It was a week into November when they finally went on the trip. Miles had rode up in Ironhide with Will since Prowl was already at their selected camping spot waiting for them. It didn't take long at all for the Captain to show Miles how to pitch a tent and best set up the logs to start a fire. Once he was done Miles went to Prowl, the SIC giving the twins the suggestion of going and looking for more firewood. Will and Ironhide agreed and the twins were sent away. Will and Ironhide went to hunt, fish, or whatever they planned to do to collect food, leaving Miles and Prowl to keep the fire going.
Will, Ironhide, Sunstreaker, and Sideswipe were under the impression that Prowl would continue to teach Miles some good wilderness survival skills, but instead they spent their time talking.
"How's it gonna go down?" Miles asked softly, speaking lowly just in case anyone might come back.
"I have a holoform there waiting for them. You'll be able to watch later when we get back to base. I might be a bit out of it, but if Ironhide and Will get back sooner than I do then just tell them I went into a light recharge." Prowl instructed, leaning against a tough tree.
Miles nodded. He waited for awhile, poking at the fire and throwing random things in it to see how they burned. Prowl eventually sat upright again, but didn't say anything just yet. Miles looked at him curiously, deciding it best not to say anything if Prowl wasn't. He heard the twins coming before he saw them, the nanobots already having succeeded in making his hearing slightly better much to Wheeljack's pleasure and Ratchet's annoyance. He watched with a bit of amusement as they raced into the clearing where camp was set up.
"Prowl-!" Sideswipe began, only to be cut off by Sunstreaker.
"There was this thing, and then we destroyed this thing, and then something happened! And Sideswipe scratched my paint!" Sunstreaker exclaimed.
Miles put a hand over his mouth to keep from snorting. He enjoyed the description that Sunstreaker gave, but Prowl just acted annoyed.
"If you destroyed something attempt to go fix it, at least." Prowl ordered, not even bothering to actually look at them.
"But we think we made something angry!" Sideswipe protested.
Miles put on a worried face, "There was someone there who saw you? We can't have you guys being found out just yet."
"No, no one saw us!" Sunstreaker cut in, stopping Sideswipe before he could say something once again. "We aren't stupid enough for that."
"Then what did you make angry?" Prowl asked.
The twins looked at each other, then back to Prowl.
"We don't know!"
Miles tried not to grin, knowing it was his turn to further the prank. "What did you destroy?"
"It'll be easier if we show you." Sideswipe said, picking Miles up and holding him as Sunstreaker activated a very basic hologram of where they had been and what they had destroyed.
"That looks Native American to me, must have been there for awhile. Sam and me had to learn about them in elementary school. I can't remember what that thing is called, or what tribe had it, but there was a legend that whoever destroyed one would be cursed by the spirits." He laughed, then, waving a hand through the hologram to make it disperse. "I always enjoyed Native American legends, they were so inventive."
He pretended not to notice Sunstreaker and Sideswipe look at each other with wide optics.
"You don't think any of it's true, do you?" Sideswipe asked tentatively.
"The legends? Oh no, I don't believe a word of them. Some, like this one, could be pretty gruesome, though." Miles replied as Sideswipe set him back down.
The twins silently conversed with each other over their private comm link as Miles scrambled up Prowl's leg and sat so he was leaning against some of Prowl's chest plates. It was just waiting at this point to see if the twins took the bait.
"Do you think you could get us that information you researched, Miles?" Sideswipe finally asked.
"Those odd ancestors of yours have gotten our interest." Sunstreaker added quickly, because of course they couldn't seem like they were afraid or might think they were targeted by a curse.
"Sure." Miles said, glancing up at Prowl with the barest of smirks. Phase B would be put into action soon.
They had just returned from the camping trip. Miles was on the phone with his parents, because despite the fact they could get reception with any of the Cybertronians there to hook them up, Will had said no as it wouldn't have been the real experience, then. Prowl walked in to the rec-room, seeing Bumblebee, Sam, Barricade, Jazz, and Epps.
As the teenager had been gone for a few days, the 'con had decided it safe enough to wander out from his hangar again. It helped that Sam had been annoying him without pause to apologize to his friend, although Barricade refused and no one was surprised by it. The 'con now sat in a lazy boy recliner, the other four sitting on one of the couches. Jazz and Bumblebee were competing in Mario Kart, Epps and Sam cheering their preferred 'bots on as Prowl walked closer, standing beside the couch. Miles soon came into the room, shoving the phone back into his pocket. Unknowingly he was scrutinized by Barricade and Sam respectively. They both noticed the odd look on his face, like he was torn between amusement and disbelief.
"What's up, buddy?" Sam asked, pretending not to notice the way Barricade tensed up as Miles moved closer to all of them.
"Sam…" For a moment he looked at a loss of words, not even glancing at Barricade. "I need you to teach me how to drive."
For a moment everyone froze, Epps and Sam looking at Miles with wide disbelieving eyes. Bumblebee quickly paused the game, joining Jazz in giving Miles an incredulous look. Prowl and Barricade both shared a look of confusion before they seemed to catch themselves and went back to looking as monotone as possible.
"Wait, what?" Sam asked stupidly, continuing to stare at his friend.
Miles rolled his eyes, "My parents got me a car. Like the non-sentient kind. And you know what sucks? We both wanted cars so bad, but they pale in comparison to having a giant alien robot as a chauffeur. And since I've always been chauffeured instead of actually driving them, I just never learned. My parents think I know because I told them Officer Ticon was letting me drive his patrol car one time."
Sam had at least known how to drive before Bumblebee had revealed himself, having driven the mech home and with Mikaela inside of him. It made sense that Barricade and Prowl had never bothered letting Miles actually take control of them before, mainly because he knew they were alive and had no problem letting them do the work.
"You never told us you didn't know how to drive, Miles." Prowl said, slightly surprised. He had never imagined that the teenager hadn't learned just yet.
"Well it seemed kind of… personal, I guess. I've only ever been in the driver's seat of moving Cybertronians, never a non-sentient car unless it was stationary. I mean, I would technically be in control of your body in a way, even if you could take control back easily it would still be weird." Miles replied, pausing for a moment as he thought. "I've mainly only been behind the wheel of you and Barricade. Once with Bumblebee when he brought me to see Blurr. All of those times you guys just drove."
Sam glanced between the Decepticon Neutral and his best human friend, noticing how he had said Barricade's full name instead of his affectionate nickname for the 'con. He tried not to sigh, realizing his friend was going to stay angry unless Barricade himself talked to him, and he wasn't sure if the mech would do that any time soon. For now, at least, it would seem like the two's relationship would stay uneasily at the edge of a metaphorical cliff.
"I believe none of us would mind teaching you if you asked," Prowl responded, Bumblebee and Jazz nodding at his statement.
"I don't know about that." Epps said, an amused grin on his face. "That'd be worse than a back seat driver. A driver that's all around you and could get pissed if you do something wrong badly enough to get them dented, or could just decide to kill you."
"I highly doubt any of us would yell or threaten him." Prowl retorted, then glanced at Barricade as if he was a last minute thought. "Well, most of us, anyway."
Barricade scowled, and Epps continued on as if Prowl hadn't said anything. "Still. Just the knowledge that you're sorta in control of another's body could freak the kid out, not to mention over half of you would baby him and not tell him if he does something wrong."
"I agree with Epps, I'd prefer to learn with a non-sentient car." Miles cut in.
"Non-sentient cars are dangerous!" Bumblebee exclaimed, surprising Jazz and Epps by speaking up at all over the matter.
"I can't believe I'm saying it, but I agree with the insect and tight ass here." Barricade added in gruffly.
Sam laughed, "And you guys are safe? Some how I think we could find more interesting ways for a Cybertronian to kill a human on accident, never even going near on purpose, compared to a car where it'd be running over the person or they were in an accident."
"Ah agree wit' tha squishies, Bee 'n Prowler." Jazz replied before Bumblebee could protest anymore, "Ah think tha' Mahles should learn with a non-sentient vehicle."
"Ha!" Miles grinned triumphantly at Bumblebee, "That's four against you and Prowl, I think we win."
Whether he purposefully or accidentally left Barricade out Sam couldn't tell, so he just shook his head. "Did they say what kind of car they got you?"
"No, but I heard mom muttering in the background about it being a metal death trap. Kind of like Judy when your dad got you Bee." Miles teased, still grinning.
"I was not a metal death trap, thank you very much!" Bumblebee replied indignantly.
"Even I have to admit you looked like one, Bee." Sam laughed.
"For all the world it seems like you guys like to look good. Holoforms, your vehicle alt mode of choice," Miles' smirk grew, "Except your first one, Bee. Every time I think of that it just ruins the whole idea."
Bumblebee huffed, "I'm never taking either of you anywhere again."
"Miles will have his own car, so if you hold out on me I won't need you!" Sam snickered.
"Ohh, gonna be cheated on with a non-sentient, Bee." Jazz laughed as well, "How does tha' make ya feel?"
Bumblebee grumbled under his breath, but didn't give them a reply. Jazz and Sam shared a laugh at his expense.
"If it makes you feel any better, non-sentients are soooo last year." Miles drawled, grinning. "I have half the mind to call my parents up and demand a Cybertronian instead."
"Hey, maybe your new car will pull a Bee." Sam suggested.
"Primus, I hope not." Miles replied, laughing. "I still remember that phone call you gave me! You sounded insane. Besides, there's enough of you Cybertronians running around as it is."
"That was when I thought Bee was pulling a Christine or Satan's Camaro, not giant alien robot from outer space." Sam grumbled good naturedly.
Miles laughed, "See, you were worried your first car was alive and what to do about it. I'm going to be worried about mine not being alive and what to do about it. Find myself treating it like a Cybertronian, probably talk to it and name it."
"You gotta bring it here so we can help you name it!" Epps exclaimed, "Maybe we could even use it to haze the newbies. Say it's like that Mountain Dew Dispenser thing and it's extremely sensitive since it can only be a car and that's it."
"Hey, there's one thing you should be thankful for." Bumblebee cut in, laughing lightly. "Cade never opened the door for you so you aren't used to that. I've seen Will get angry at a non-sentient car for not opening the door until he remembered it was non-sentient."
"I remember that!" Miles snorted, "And I'll always buckle. Barricade very rarely buckled me up, but he'd always remind me to because it's the law."
Sam was the only one to notice that Miles never talked directly at the 'con or even seemed to acknowledge his existence at all. He knew he wasn't the only one to keep looking between the two, though, because he caught both Bumblebee and Prowl doing it several times, as if waiting for something to happen.
"Tha only trouble ya might' 'ave is following' the speed limit." Jazz said, grinning.
"Yeah, you guys definitely have issues obeying those." Sam replied, laughing. "I actually think it'd be good if we all have a crash course on non-sentient cars for those who have been around the Cybertronians the longest."
"Everyone in NEST is going to be so screwed up with non-sentient cars. I know I treat mine like it's alive. Haven't named it just yet, thankfully." Epps added, turning off the game Jazz and Bumblebee had been playing.
"My dad and me can teach you when we go back home." Sam offered, then paused at he glanced at Miles' ears. "Well, when you return home, or get a hat that covers those things effectively."
"Speaking of those, are the nanobots doing anything?" Epps asked. "I asked the Hatchet but he said patient doctor confidentiality bullshit."
"I can see in the dark better and my hearing's improved." Miles admitted with a shrug. "Maybe some other crap, but I haven't noticed it yet."
"Personally I'm hoping you at least keep the ears. They make you look so cute." Sam teased, grinning when Miles glared at him.
Miles huffed, "I'll make sure to tell Wheeljack to make you a pair then."
"Order a pair for Will too, would you?" Epps asked with a snicker, "I'd love to see Sarah's face when she saw 'em."
"Maybe it'll spice up their sex life. Have him as a big strong lion." Miles suggested, grinning as Sam and Epps burst out laughing.
"I remember the first time Ironhide heard them doing it." Epps said lowly, glancing around to make sure that Ironhide and Will were no where in sight. "He panicked because he thought Will was hurting her and had gone insane, so he transformed and broke open the window. Needless to say he got the birds and the bees talk, and was thus banned to the end of the driveway for a month."
Miles started to crack up and Sam just continued to laugh. It was then that Sideswipe and Sunstreaker came into the rec-room, quickly going over to the blonde teen. They looked slightly uncomfortable, and just grabbed Miles by the arm, attempting to drag him out.
"Hey, what?" Miles asked, confused for a brief second as he struggled against them.
"We need that information," Sideswipe stated.
"What? Oh!" Miles exclaimed, looking back to the others to see Prowl winking at him. "I was busy talking! Can't it wait?"
"No." Sunstreaker growled, dragging Miles out of the room.
Barricade looked to Prowl, "What the slag was that about?"
"Nothing important." Prowl replied calmly.
"Nothing important my aft. It's the twins, they don't kidnap people for no reason." Barricade growled.
"I'm his Guardian, if you would take a moment to remember that, Barricade." Prowl's doorwings hitched up into an annoyed 'v' as he glared at the 'con, "I'm not worried about it. It hardly matters that you appear to be, for whatever reason you care to give, as he is not your concern, which you made quite clear a few days ago, if you recall. Now if you'll all excuse me, I have work to do."
He quickly left, not bothering to look to see what his words may have done. Sam winced when he heard Barricade snarl, looking at the 'con to say something only to watch him disappear out of sight.
Sam sighed, "How quickly do you think this thing will work out?"
"Decepticon stubbornness going up against teenager stubbornness?" Epps asked, shrugging. "Don't have a slaggin' clue."
The others just nodded their heads in agreement.
A few more days passed and Wheeljack was finally able to remove the ears and tail. Miles was put on bed rest for the entirety of the day to make sure that there was no repercussions. While he was thankful for their removal, Ratchet hadn't been able to figure out anything for the nanobots yet and had talked about nothing else the entire time he had been in the med-bay. Finally the teen had gotten fed up and told the CMO that they didn't matter, that he was viewing it the same way Wheeljack was since they weren't doing anything but benefiting him, and that the mech could put his energies elsewhere finally.
In celebration of Miles being freed from the cat paraphernalia and the med-bay, they decided to have Saturday be horror movie night. It was already late and Sam, Miles, Mikaela, Maggie, Will, Epps, Jazz, Bumblebee, Inferno, Barricade, Prowl, and Ironhide were in the human rec-room, watching Dawn of the Dead. Sam and Mikaela were sitting side by side in the Lazy Boy with Bumblebee and Barricade at their feet, Miles was in between Inferno and Prowl, and Will, Maggie, Epps, Jazz, and Ironhide sat on one couch together. Most of them were surprised when Sunstreaker and Sideswipe burst in to the room.
"Barricade, Prowl! Miles, he-" Sunstreaker started, but Sideswipe cut him off.
"He just died! We couldn't even do anything!" Sideswipe exclaimed, both sounding more than a bit hysterical.
"Oh, that's right," Miles said sarcastically, causing the two to notice him and stare at him in shock. "I forgot all about dying and you two not being able to do anything about it!"
They stared at him in shock.
"But you-! But-!" They said as one.
Sam laughed, "Miles has been with us all day."
Us was Mikaela, Barricade, Jazz, Bumblebee, Prowl, and Epps. They might not be on talking terms, but that didn't mean they hadn't been in each other's company. Barricade had grown used to associating with everyone that Miles did by this point, even seeming to forgive the Scout and being on speaking terms with him again. It didn't help that even if the two weren't currently talking a lot of people, and Cybertronians, just expected them to be together at this point.
"Sunstreaker, Sideswipe, what do you hope to achieve with this lie?" Prowl asked, ignoring the grin Miles gave him.
"But we're not lying!" They protested together, "He really did!"
"Get it on video?" Maggie asked, not necessarily jumping to their defense but not disbelieving them either. "There's cameras in every hall, and on the outside of the buildings."
"Yeah!" They exclaimed, grabbing Miles and practically carrying him out of the room. "We'll show you that you did!"
"I don't want to see that!" Miles protested weakly, knowing he had no chance of escaping one, let alone both of them.
He sent a pleading look over his shoulder, though it was mostly aimed at Prowl, who he was sure had gotten him into this. Sam, Prowl, Barricade, and Bumblebee got up and followed the twins as they carried Miles down the hall between them. They walked to the control room, Prowl taking over and asking the twins where and when. He accessed the file and brought up the recording, playing it until it suddenly went white with static. They could still hear the twins on the video, yelling at each other and at Miles.
"Oh, haha, very nice, you guys." Sam said sarcastically, ready to turn to glare at them but stopped when the recording fuzzed out slightly and showed the blurry shapes of Sunstreaker and Sideswipe in bipedal form with a smaller shape near them. "Used a holoform to stay consistent, cool."
"But, we didn't…" Their protest's were weak by this point, "It was…"
Miles shared a look with Prowl before turning back to the twins, "That's almost funny. I would be laughing if you would have used what I told you on Sam, but he doesn't remember it that much anyway."
"Bee would freak out so badly on your afts." Sam snorted, knowing only that Miles was messing with the twins.
"We wouldn't fake your death. We'd really kill you." Sunstreaker snorted, Sideswipe nodding in agreement.
That seemed to be the wrong thing to say because Bumblebee proceeded to chase both of them out of the room, yelling half-hearted threats after them. Sam snickered, watching as Miles leaned up against Prowl and whispered in his holoform's ear, a clear indication that the mech was probably involved as well. Out of the corner of his eye he noticed Barricade looking rather forlorn. He knew it was probably over whatever Miles was doing to mess with the twins, but he was fairly sure Barricade didn't.
"Okay, you have got to show me what the fuck you did to them, and tell me how! You were with me the whole time!" Miles hissed softly into Prowl's ear, barely speaking at all knowing that Prowl would be able to pick it up.
"Patience," Prowl chuckled, "We have company."
"That sounds… wrong." Sam said, desperately trying not to laugh.
"Jealous, Samuel?" Miles teased with a grin.
"You know it, babe." Sam replied, laughing. Prowl gave them both a look and left the room, muttering just loud enough for them to hear him complaining about illogical human teenagers. They both laughed at him.
Miles looked at Sam and winked, "Don't worry, I'll show you the video once we're done putting it all together."
And just like that Miles was gone, giving chase after Prowl. Sam snorted, turning to give Barricade a stern look.
"You don't get to throw a hissy and pretend you loathe him and then get jealous when he buddies up with some other mech," Sam informed him. "You abandoned him, not the other way around. Don't act like you're the one left out on the curb when you know there's ways to make it better for yourself."
Barricade glared at him and Sam held his ground, narrowing his eyes right back at the 'con. Finally he just snorted and dissolved his holoform, leaving the teen unsure whether or not anything he had said actually stuck.