A/N: Hello Everyone! How are you all doing? So it turns out I got this up on Friday, it's been a very busy week with Christmas coming up and all, but thankfully I got this up.

As always, I was blown away by all your reviews. You're all so amazing! Thank you so much. I replied to you all, and like I said before to the anonymous and PM disabled reviewers, ask me a question if you want and I'll answer it here.

Anyway, I hope you all enjoy this!

Chapter 14: Beautiful Monster

You know that feeling? The feeling you get when you see something so terrifying that your whole body tingles and your eyes can't believe what they're seeing? Well most people probably don't, because the scariest things you ever see are on horror movies. Never once did I think that I'd see something so unreal, so scarily shocking in reality.

As my legs carried me out of the woods and onto First Beach, I wasn't even sure whether I was running or walking, the only thing I was sure of was that... Jacob… was… I couldn't even think of what he'd just.. transformed into. The memory was too scary.

The beach was deserted as thunder roared in the distance and rain lashed down, soaking me to the bone. But I wasn't even aware of how cold I was, all my mind was set on was getting the hell out of there.

For a split second, I thought I'd driven my car here tonight and a flood of relief washed through me- then I remembered I hadn't.

Kara had been right, I shouldn't have been sneaking out to see a guy I barely knew. Why couldn't I have listened to her in the first place? oh right, because I wasn't using my head, I was following my heart. Well my heart certainly didn't know what to do now.

Passing by the bonfire Billy and Old Quil had been telling the stories at, a shiver ran up my spine, and I wondered whether anyone knew what Jacob was. Perhaps his father did? after all, he raised him.

But I couldn't fight back the anger that bubbled inside of me at the thought of Billy Black allowing his son to mix with humans. There'd been occasions when Jacob had thrown hints about his.. inhumanness. Like when he'd told me his temperature was higher than mine, and when he'd told me the story of the merman.

Was that his way of preparing me for what was to come?

I was almost positive it was, and that only angered me more. How dare he thrust himself into my life knowing what he was! Didn't he care about me and how I'd feel about his secret? Obviously not.

He wasn't what I thought he was, he was the complete opposite. A monster.

Suddenly, I tripped over scattered driftwood and fell face down into the wet sand, my heart hammering against my chest. The rain coming down in buckets now, chilling me inside out. But I made no move to get up, I was hurting both mentally and physically that I couldn't find the strength to.

Memories of the times I'd spent with Jacob played like a movie in my head, from the beginning to the end. The last part scared me, and I tried my best not to think about it, to try and pretend it never happened. Instead I focused on the kiss we'd shared, and how his lips felt even better than I'd imagined.

And so I lay there, curled up into a ball as sobs escaped my throat and salty tears ran down my cheeks.

It felt like I'd been there forever, and I fully intended to stay there until the break of dawn, but a warm breeze drifted over my legs, causing me to roll onto my back immediately— I still can't make out whether that was a mistake or not.

"Nina," he whispered shakily, staring down at me with worried eyes.

I wanted to scream and cry for help, maybe even attempt to run away, but Jacob's eyes held me where I was. We stared at each other for a few long seconds, before my eyes drifted downwards, taking in his whole figure.

He was naked. Oh.

Snapping my eyes back up to his, I tried to mask my shock with anger, hoping he'd believe I wasn't afraid of him or startled by his nudity, just disgusted. However, I didn't wait for him to do or say anything, I just scrambled to my feet as quickly as I could and backed away from him.

Taking a step forward to follow me, I shook my head. "Don't."

"I can explain," he said, his voice strained and hard to hear over the rain. "Just-."

"No," I told him, my lips trembling as I continued to back away from him.

The problem was, how on earth was I supposed to run away? he'd catch me, no doubt about it. But you never know until you try, and if I don't make it… well, there was nothing else I could've done.

Giving him one last stare, I turned on my heel and made a beeline for the parking lot. I didn't know where I got the speed from, because normally I was slow, very slow. Who cared anyway, I was getting further and further away from him.

For the first time in a very very long time, I actually wanted my parents.

"Nina!," he hissed, grabbing my arm and twirling me around to face him.

At least I tried to get away…

"Let me go," I begged, standing still, afraid.

His eyes widened. "I'm not going to hurt you."

Tears started to pour from my eyes again. "Please."

"I would never ever hurt you," he told me, placing his free hand on my shoulder. "Never."

Although a part of me believed him, the other part was afraid and much more dominant of my feelings. Here I was, standing with a man I fell in love with, who turned out to be some sort of mythical creature. I, for one, found that terrifying. How I was even forming words was beyond me.

And I didn't want to begin to imagine how what I saw had taken place, it was far too scary. Weren't things like that supposed to happen in stories only? Nobody would believe me if I told them, and Kara would think I'd lost it. Not that I hadn't already.

"I want to go home," I choked out, shivering in my soaked clothes. Knowing full well that I'd be very sick tomorrow.

Next of all he was gripping my face in his large hands, warming my cheeks as he stared down at me, his long hair dripping wet over his shoulders. "I'll explain everything to you tomorrow, I swear. I understand if you're completely freaked out now, I was too when it happened to me, trust me. Just let me see you tomorrow, and we can talk about it. I'll answer everything. I promise."

I sniffled, my throat constricting as I forced the next words out. "I don't want to see you again Jacob."

His grip on my face tightened, hurt flashing in his obsidian eyes. "You don't mean that."

"I do.."

"Please Nina, please don't do this, please," he begged, breathing heavily as he rested his forehead against mine. "I can't lose you honey, please. We've only gotten to know each other and I wouldn't be able to live without you, please. Don't let go of this."

As much as it hurt me, tore me apart inside, I couldn't give him what he wanted. Us. After what I'd just witnessed, I wasn't up for anything, all I wanted to do was lay in bed and pretend none of this ever happened. So we stood there, me shivering in the rain, crying silent tears as he held onto me, begging me to give him a chance.

The answer was always no.

Unexpectedly and faster than I could've imagined, his hands found their way into my hair as he crushed his lips to mine, attacking my mouth with kisses. Even over the sound of the lashing rain, and thunder, I could hear the wet noises his mouth made while he devoured mine.

Maybe it was foolish and stupid of me, but I let him have his way; I parted my lips for him whenever he wanted access, I stayed still while his sweet tongue slid over mine and I didn't push him away when his kisses became more urgent. I basically allowed him to make love to my mouth, even though it repulsed me— as shocking as that was.

I guess I just wanted him to prove to me that everything would be okay, that his kisses would somehow make things go back to normal and that all this shock and horror would go away in an instant. But it didn't, life wasn't that simple.

My shaky, trembling hands found Jacob's narrow hips, and I pushed against them. However, he was very wet and slippery, and I was suddenly aware of his nakedness. Which made this whole situation seem so very inappropriate.

What if someone saw us? Saw him? They'd think we were… I didn't even want to go there.

So I turned my head to the side, his open mouthed kiss landing on my cheek instead. He must've gotten the hint, because he untangled his hands from my hair and let me go. No longer touching any part of me.

"I'm sorry," he whispered hoarsely. "I'm sorry I'm not the right guy for you, I'm a monster."

Choking back a sob, my gaze drifted back up to his. "You're not a monster," I offered. Though we both knew I was lying, after all, if he wasn't a monster I wouldn't have been standing there shaking with fear.

Yet Jacob Black was too beautiful to be a monster, even now, after what I'd seen him turn into, he was still perfect in my eyes. Staring at his naked body would've been rude, but I'd seen everything, and he was flawless. Too gorgeous for words.

That didn't change my mind about earlier though, I was still in shock and I was terrified he'd change again. I just couldn't believe that such things were possible, and being around him scared me, because he wasn't... human.

Why couldn't all this be just a dream?

"You're going to be very sick tomorrow-."

"I'm going home Jacob."

He grabbed my hand. "Then let me take you."

"No!," I yelled, the anger boiling up inside of me again. "No! I told you already, I don't want to see you again. So please, just go home. I can't handle this… it's too much."

Flinching, he dropped my hand. "We'll handle it together Nee, I promise you'll get used to it," he said desperately with hope filled eyes. "I'll tell you every single thing, I'll make things easier for you."

My head started to spin. "Jacob, you don't understand how hard-," I paused, taking a deep breath. "It is for a girl like me to wrap my head around what I've just seen. I'm going to be a mess when I get home, and things will be bad for me, so all I ask is that you stay away from me.. and from my family. Please."

"How can you say that? After everything?," he asked brokenly, lips quivering. "You're my best friend Nina, you know I'll be there for you, you know that I'd never hurt your family-."

"I never knew that you could do what you just did!."

"But I was planning to tell you, I just needed some time."

I shook my head. "No, forget it. I'm going home, and I… d-don't want to see you again."

Stepping forward, he wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me flush against him. "Please," he begged, burying his face in the crook of my neck. "Don't walk away."

"I'm sorry…," I trailed off, knowing I'd cry if I said anything more. Pressing a kiss over his heart as it thumped against my lips, I pulled away from him, and stared up into his dark eyes one last time. No longer happy and full of life, but teary and sad, the sorrow in them tearing me apart.

So before I did or said anything I'd regret, I backed away from him before turning on my heel and running all the way home in the pouring rain. He never followed me or called my name, and I was thankful for that. Because if he had, I may have told him I loved him, and that would've been a mistake.

That night, standing under the shower as the hot water flowed down my body, reminding me of him, I broke down. Biting down on my lip to muffle my sobs, careful not to wake my parents.

The first week had been very painful for me; I wasn't getting any sleep, the thought of eating repulsed me, I hardly spoke and I was constantly cold. It was the strangest feeling, because I knew that I was perfectly warm inside my room, yet It wouldn't go away, that wasn't the only thing though.

Whenever I did find some sleep, whether it be for just an hour or less, I'd dream of him.. Jacob. The weird part was that in the dreams I wasn't myself, I was him, and though it wasn't real, I could feel everything. From the painful experience of him exploding into — what I would call — a gigantic wolf, to the painful pulling in his heart while he was away from me.

Of course I'd wake up panting in my bed, drenched in a cool sweat from the overwhelming emotions the dream caused, but I wondered why I was dreaming such dreams. All I wanted was to forget about what I'd seen, and forget about him… although I knew that wouldn't be possible.

As the second week passed by, I gave up hoping the dreams would go away, because I knew they weren't, and instead let my mind wander to other things. Like how he even existed, why he wanted me in his life, who that pale man was that made him turn into the wolf, and what age he really was— you never really know with mythical creatures.

A memory that really pained me was the night I spent at his, and the story he'd told me about the merman. I'd told him that if the merman revealed his secret to me, I'd remain his friend, and now I knew that it was really about him.

Yet, I pushed him away.

He hadn't been to school for the first week, but he'd attended class during the second week. We never made eye-contact, and we avoided each other as much as possible. Though it was awkward sitting next to him in English.

This was my third week of not speaking to him, and I was listening to Kara talk about her college plans during lunch break in the cafeteria. She hadn't brought the subject of Jacob and I up once, but then again, you shouldn't speak too soon.

"Nina." she sighed. "Look I know that you obviously don't want to talk about what happened, but I'm really starting to worry about you. You're not eating, you won't talk, and you look like crap. No offense."

I stared down at my uneaten pizza slice. "I need time Kara."

"But it's just not normal, you guys weren't even dating."

"True." I looked up at her. "But you don't need to be dating someone to have feelings for them."

She rolled her eyes. "I know, but something really bad must've happened Nina, and I know it's your business and all, but I'm your best friend and I think it'd be better if you just told me, it's not like I'm going to tell anyone."

"Some things are just better left unsaid, trust me."

"Not when you're starving yourself Nina! Did he hurt you or something? because if he did, I'll be paying your 'rents a visit."

"He didn't."

Pushing her drink out of the way, she leaned across the table. "Was he forcing himself on you? That-."

"No!," I hissed, mortified. "Nothing like that, just leave it Kara, please."

slumping back in her chair, she let out a breath. "Alright, I will for now. I'm just trying to look out for you Nina. Oh and fyi, Jacob looks like crap too. One hundred times worse than when that Bella girl married some dude and broke his heart. I think he's in love with you."

I snorted. "Kara, you've officially gone too far."

"No really." She nodded. "He is, and the funniest part? You guys aren't even talking anymore. That's always the way isn't it?."

"Yeah," I agreed. Even though I doubted he 'loved' me.

"Has he kissed you?," she asked randomly.

My cheeks instantly started burning, and I avoided her gaze. "Kara please."

"What!," she shrieked. "You guys kissed and you never told me? maybe my theory was wrong."

"Theory? What theory?."

She waved it off just as the bell rang. "Doesn't matter, after school I want details."

"But Kara I don't want to talk about him," I whined.

"All I want to know about is the kiss, then we'll spend the rest of the day talking about other hot guys okay? Ciao."

And then she was gone, leaving me alone with me thoughts once again.

I'd tell her about the kiss we shared in the woods, the one that only lasted a second, the one when I kissed him back and thought mythical creatures didn't exist. The one when I believed he was human and not a beautiful monster.

But I wouldn't tell her about the more intimate one. The one where he was in control, naked…

Across the room, I could see Embry Call and Quil Ateara watching me, Jacob nowhere in sight. Ever since he came back to school, he avoided the cafeteria, much to my confusion. We didn't even sit with each other, so it wouldn't make any difference if he was present or not.

Staring back into Embry's eyes, I wondered whether he knew about Jacob. There was something about the way both of them stared over at me, that told me they knew something, but what puzzled me was how they could hang around with him, weren't they afraid?

They probably didn't, and I didn't have time to wonder anyway, I had classes to attend.

Classes I used to find extremely boring, but now found interesting because they helped ease my mind.

They helped me not think about him.

Later that day, I had just entered the house when my mom called me into the living room. Her voice sounded a little too high pitched to be classified as normal, and I instantly found myself dreading whatever she was about to say to me.

I'd had enough interrogating for the day from Kara. She practically bullied me into giving her every detail of the kiss Jacob and I shared. Didn't she understand that it physically pained me to talk about him? some people…

Walking into the room, I offered my mom a smile. "Hey."

"Hi honey, come sit next to me."

I hesitantly dropped my schoolbag by the arm chair and made my way over to the couch, taking the spot beside her. She looked off… and a little pale… and a bit nervous. This scared me, because she was never that way.

"So…?," I started, watching her carefully.

Her tired eyes met mine. "Nina I know that you won't take this too well, and I'm so sorry that after all this time things have to change. I really am, and I love you and Joey so much. Don't ever doubt that."

I gulped. "Mom, just spit it out."

For a long second she just sat there, staring into my eyes, tears building up in hers. She seemed so small and fragile at that moment, something I never thought I'd see. But seeing her like that, still dressed in her white pajamas, hair tied back in a messy knot, broke my heart.

She was a good woman, but married to the wrong man— although I did love my dad, they didn't suit each other.

Taking hold of my hands, she took a deep breath. "Your father and I are getting a divorce."

Wait, what?

"What do you mean?," I asked confusedly. Shocked by what I'd just heard.

"We can't do this whole marriage thing… it's just not working out anymore."

"But you love dad, you're always supporting him and treating him well."

She sighed shakily. "People change honey, they get bored.. they meet other people."

Did she mean what I thought she meant?

"Mom," I said slowly. "Did dad meet someone else?."

How the questions were pouring from my mouth after the news I'd just received, I will never know. I suppose it's because I'd been through a lot the past three weeks, and my feelings were numb… if that even made sense.

Like I'd said before, mom and dad were one the most unsuitable couples I'd ever seen. Mom was the sweet, kind, housewife a lot of men would be lucky to have. Whilst my father was the unappreciative, bossy husband that tore families apart.

Not saying my dad didn't have his good points, he did, but if I ever met a man who treated me the way he treated my mother, I'd leave him.

Mom dropped my hands and started picking at her nails, avoiding my eyes. "No, honey, he didn't."

"Well nothing's making sense to me-."

"I did," she whispered.

My jaw dropped, eyes grew wide and I froze, staring at her in disbelief. My mother had met someone else, and not dad, who I would've bet all my money on. This just wasn't happening, life didn't get this complicated.

First Jacob turns out to be a monster, and now mom's a cheater? I think I'm about to pass out.

"I don't know what to say," I told her, my voice strained.

She looked up at me. "You don't have to say a word honey."

And then she started talking, the story of her and a man called Ray unfolding. She'd known him all her life, and as teenagers, they became best friends. In her eyes he was perfect, inside and out, and made her feel special. They worked together at the local grocery store where she grew up, and got they got along like a house on fire.

She described the feeling whenever she saw him magical and sensational. Her thoughts were only of him, and apparently he felt the same. But they never became anything more than friends, because his family moved to England, taking him with them.

The heartbreak was one of the worst times of her life she'd said, they never wrote to each other or called, and after five long years she met my dad. So in an attempt to heal her broken heart, she devoted herself to him, married him, and had children.

But she never forgot Raymond, so a year ago when he looked her up and phoned —Joey and I were obviously in school, dad was working— the love that never died for him, came back full force, and she was that lovesick teenager all over again.

They'd met up a couple of times back in Seattle, but ever since we'd moved here they hadn't been able to. Of course they met up as old friends, but Ray let my mother know how he felt about her, and so she admitted her love for him also.

Though she promised herself she wouldn't cheat on dad, and so this is partly why they're getting a divorce. So she can finally be with the man she truly loves and — in my opinion — deserves.

I found myself crying along with my mom to her story, and I realized that as unbelievable as it was, real love stories did exist.

"There is a problem though," my mom said, a serious expression crawling back onto her face. "Your brother won't take this too well, and that complicates things."

"Don't worry about it, I'll talk to him," I said, giving her a smile. Although inside I was crying, because well… I felt bad for dad.

"Honey, Joey's only a child, he won't understand. Moving won't be easy for him."

My eyes grew wide. "Mom I'm not moving, no way!."

She nodded. "I know you don't want to, but you're old enough to see things for what they really are. Moving isn't so bad."

"But mom, you can't make me leave, mom please," I begged, my whole body shaking for reasons unknown to me.

"Shush, don't worry Nina." She placed a hand on my shoulder. "Calm down. You like Seattle don't you? It's only been a few months since we lived there."

"What are you… is Dad moving to Seattle? Is he? I'm not going!."

This horrible feeling started twisting itself up in my stomach, causing me to wrap an arm around my mid-section. The pulling I'd been feeling in my heart lately increased, and I bit my lip to keep from whimpering.

A pained look crossed her face. "Nina please calm yourself down, I'll go get you a glass of water."

"No." I grabbed her arm. "I'll be fine, but I'm not leaving La Push."

"Honey your father isn't leaving, I am."

"Mom! You can't leave! That's… that's.. unacceptable," I screeched. "This is just so messed up!."

"I know it is Nina," she started. "But no one said life was easy, and you're not an adult yet so we have to make choices for you whether you like them or not."

"Mom.. I love you and all, but I'm not strong enough for this," I said weakly. A tear escaping the corner of my eye. "I can't leave mom, please don't make me."

She hugged me then, tighter than usual. "I love you too Nina, so much. I'm so sorry that your father and I can't get along. You have no idea how many fights we've had over the past few months, it drove me insane. And I need you to know that I'm not divorcing him because of Ray, It's just for my own good." She pulled back, holding my face in her hands. "And it'll be good for you and Joey to leave with me, Seattle has much more to offer you than La Push does. We shouldn't have come here in the first place."

I shook my head, eyes frantic. "No mom, coming to La Push was the best thing that ever happened to me. I'm staying, you can't make me leave. I'm sick and tired of being made do things, I've got no say in anything. It's driving me insane!."

La Push was tiny and yes it hadn't really got anything, but I felt a connection to it somehow. I felt that I needed to be here, and even though I wasn't talking to Jacob anymore, I didn't feel strong enough to just… leave him.

Gosh, I was so messed up.

"Nina!," she hissed. "You're losing control of yourself, calm down."

Calm down? How on earth was I supposed to calm down after being told that my parents are getting divorced and that my mom wants to take my brother and I back to Seattle? This situation just wasn't fair at all.

As much as mom deserved some happiness in her life with a man more suitable for her, I couldn't help but feel outraged by her other decisions. Joey had made friends here and was happy enough, and I was fine… well almost. She couldn't make us leave.

"What about dad? Does he have a say in this?," I asked.

She nodded. "Of course."

"Then we all need to talk about this, and soon, because I will not leave. I swear."

Without waiting for an answer, I jumped off the sofa and ran up to my room.

To think, like I always did.

That night, the doorbell rang, and when I answered the door, I was surprised to see Kara standing there.

"What the hell are you doing out at this hour?," I asked, staring at her in wonder.

She smiled tiredly. "It's not every night I get a hunky visitor with a message for me to send."

"Okay so I have no idea what you're talking about so just get in out of the cold."

"No! No, I have to go straight home. I came here to give you this." She held out a white envelope and I stared at it. "Take it already."

Snatching it from her hand, I narrowed my eyes. "Is this one of your lame attempts at a prank Kara?."

"No.' she stuck her tongue out at me. "It's actually from Jacob Black."

Rolling my eyes, I slumped against the doorframe. "That's so funny I forgot to laugh."

She swatted me across the arm with her handbag. "Open it and see for yourself, he was like pounding on our front door. Dad thought it was the police or something, and mom thought we were going to be robbed. Anyway I told them it was just a classmate of mine."

My heart sunk. "You're not kidding are you?."

"Nope." She popped the 'p'. "It was him looking as wretched as ever. You know those lovely long locks of hair he's got? Yeah well they didn't look so lovely tonight, he actually looked like he'd been stranded on an Island for the past two months. But it was kind of hot I guess-."

"Kara! Just stop it, please," I pleaded with desperate eyes. "I've already-."

"Yeah I know, you don't want to talk about him, I'll stop for your sake. Can I ask you for one thing though?."

I bit my lip. "Hmm…."

"I did do both of you guys a favor by taking the note from him and bringing it here, you at least owe me this." She smiled wickedly.

"Fine, what is it?."

"Tell me everything-." She pointed at the note in my hand. "That says, tomorrow."

"Okay," I agreed quickly before I started an argument with her. Talk about nosy…

"Goodnight Nee," she winked, before walking away.

A blush crept up into my cheeks at the fact that Kara now knew what Jacob's nickname for me was. He must've called me that when he'd turned up at her house, looking all broken and hurt and sad… my thoughts trailed off as my heart leapt in my chest just by thinking of him.

Stepping back inside the hall, I shut the door and stared at the letter all the way up to my room, afraid it would somehow disappear.

Locking my bedroom door, I flung myself onto the bed and ripped open the white envelope. Pulling the yellow-colored paper out, I quickly unfolded it and began to read it very slowly from the beginning as it shook in my hands.

Nina

I know you said you never wanted to see me again, and I suppose that means you don't want to hear from me either. So I decided to write you a letter. It took me a couple of times to get it right, to make everything clear for you, because we both know my handwriting sucks and I'm no good at writing.

Maybe you'll hate me for doing this, maybe you'll feel I'm crossing the line, the line you drew between us, but I needed to write you this. You deserve to know more about how I feel about you, and maybe by the end you'll want to know more about me.

Nina I know this may sound strange to you, but I have feelings for you. I've liked you since the day I saw you, and when we started spending time together, I realized how easy it was to be around you. It was as natural as breathing, like I've always wanted.

You're special to me, more special than you will ever know. I cherish every moment I spend with you, hell, I've been driving my friends crazy talking about you. The whole neighborhood probably knows every single detail of our time spent together- well not everything, I left some parts out, I guess you know which ones.

But Nina, I don't want you to think that this letter I'm writing to you is just some attempt at trying to get you back, trust me it's not. I've been through a lot over the past three years and I've learned that no matter how hard you try to get someone to want you, to choose you over everyone else, it never works. So yes, I'll hope and pray that you'll give me a chance, but no, I won't overstep your boundaries.

I want to apologize for that night, the night you let go of us. I kissed you against your will and that was disrespectful of me, I'm really sorry about that. I'm also sorry for my lack of clothes that night, it was totally uncalled for, but I had no other choice… I'd explain if you wanted me to. I just hope you forgive me, because I truly am sorry.

When I saw you laying there in the sand, drenched with the rain, it broke my heart. You didn't deserve to see that… to see me like that. You were shivering and shaking with fear, god I.. I hated myself for scaring you like that. But Nina, I would never ever hurt you. Please believe me.

And I miss you like crazy honey, it physically hurts me to not be around you for so long. I can't sleep, I hardly eat, and when I do sleep (whether it be an hour or less) I'm plagued by nightmares. Sometimes, as weird as this sounds, I dream I'm you.

You're tossing and turning in your bed, you're afraid. You feel alone in this world, like the one thing you've always wanted was taken away from you. It pulls at your heart and you feel cold, all the time- that's the dream I always have of you, and when I wake up, my heart's hammering in my chest, my whole body burning. And I want to see you, just so I can make sure that you're alright. But I know that's out of the question.

So I wander the night alone, trying to tire myself out, but I can't, all I think about is you and a lot of the time I remember our first kiss. How your lips felt against mine, your skin so soft against my hands, that lavender perfume you wear… It felt so right at the time, but it didn't last… they're always in the way…

Look, I just need you to know that I care about you more than anything, that I'll always be here if you need me, and that I'm not mad at you for the choice you made, it's understandable. You're always welcome at my home, and if you ever decide to talk to me again, I'll be whoever you want me to be. Your friend, your brother, you're confidant or your lover.

I'll be thinking of you all day, every day.

Yours forever

Jacob Black

P.S: Take a look inside the envelope, I left you a little something.