Crunch. King Piccolo munched loudly, and had barely swallowed before he shoved another handful of popcorn into his mouth. He was spread across the sofa in Frikiza's capsule house, just as he had been for the past three hours, watching Goku and Piccolo Junior on a fifty inch spy-screen.
"Are you going to stay there all night?" Frikiza's nagging voice came from somewhere else in the room.
"Tch. Why is he friends with that runt?" King Piccolo snorted, watching in disapproval as Piccolo Junior stood on Kami's Lookout, having a pleasant conversation with Dende. "He doesn't even have an evil side – at least the last Kami was capable of producing me."
"Whatever." Frikiza sighed. She moved her eyes down to the floor beneath King Piccolo, and her face filled with rage. "Hey!" Frikiza yelled. "Can you clean up this mess? Don't be such a slob!"
"Huh?" King Piccolo moved his eyes to the floor, and noticed that he couldn't actually see it beneath the mountain of empty drink cartons and snack packets he'd been dumping throughout his movie session. "Oh…" King Piccolo smirked. "Sorry." He tilted his head back and emptied his popcorn packet into his mouth and swallowed the contents whole, then tossed the empty packet onto the waste pile before stating, "You should clean it up. It's disgusting."
"Me!" Frikiza shrieked. "It's your mess!"
"But I'm a guest in your house. You can't expect me to clean." King Piccolo insisted. "Besides…" He looked at Frikiza and smirked. "Aren't icejin women supposed to clean up after men?"

King Piccolo watched in glee as Frikiza's eyes glowed with anger and her ki skyrocketed.
"Shut up!" Frikiza screamed. "And actually, we're only expected to clean up after our husbands and their guests – because we're not supposed to have any other men in the house!" She folded her arms and looked away stubbornly. "So according to icejin rules, you shouldn't even be here."
"Well, just tell all the other icejins that you're married and I'm a friend of your husband's." King Piccolo said, and picked up his can of melon soda.

Frikiza watched as King Piccolo drank noisily, his eyes fixed on the spy-screen. Tch. He was disgusting. What sort of slob didn't clean up after himself? He was gross!
"My husband wouldn't be friends with you." Frikiza hissed.
"Hm?" King Piccolo stopped drinking, and looked at her. "You have a husband?" He blinked. He didn't know that. Did that mean Frieza had a wife? But wasn't Frieza gay? …. Since when did Frikiza have a husband anyway? Not that it matter to him. It was no concern of King Piccolo's if Frikiza had a… husband…

King Piccolo frowned slightly as a strange feeling took him by surprise. He was… annoyed. Why was he annoyed? Why should he care if Frikiza was married? It didn't matter to him!
"Technically." Frikiza answered. "We're separated now, so we're as good as divorced."
"Oh…" King Piccolo mumbled. The feeling started to subside. He felt… relieved. Why did he feel that way? He didn't care if she was married! She could have a hundred husbands or none at all, it was no concern of his! "So you don't care about him?" King Piccolo grunted. Why was he asking that! He wasn't interested!
"No, that's not it at all!" Frikiza gasped. "I care about him a lot, he means the world to me." Okay, there was that feeling again. King Piccolo was annoyed – no, angry! Who the hell was this guy anyway? This stupid man that Frikiza was married to? King Piccolo tried to picture him. He was small, wasn't he? King Piccolo was convinced this guy was tiny. Tiny, and weak, and worthless.
"I could take him." King Piccolo thought. Yeah. Definitely. He could kick that guy's ass! Frikiza didn't need to be with a weakling like that anyway. Why did she even marry him?
"I just… never felt 'that way' about him." Frikiza shrugged, continuing on. "We didn't get married for love – he's from a rich family, so it was a political marriage. Most icejin marriages are."
"So what, he's… not your type?" King Piccolo questioned. This was weird… He really wanted her to answer. He needed her to answer. What was going on!
"No… Not really, I guess." Frikiza sighed. "Glazio's very sweet, and he always was a loving husband, but… I just couldn't get into him. I tried."
"… Oh." King Piccolo grunted. Well, it made sense. Frikiza was a powerful woman with a strong personality, so of course she would need a strong man to handle her. This 'Glazio' punk sounded like nothing more than a bleeding heart weakling – he couldn't satisfy Frikiza if his life depended on it! Haha. Loser.

Frikiza looked at King Piccolo, and frowned slightly when a sudden look of glee swept across his face. What was he so happy about? All she said was that she wasn't attracted to her husband – why was that so amusing? Piccolo didn't really care about that, did he? Why would he? Unless…? … Frikiza blushed slightly, then smirked as an idea came into her head. Maybe…
"But… Still, of all the men I could have chosen, Glazio was definitely the best." Frikiza said, taking a seat on the arm of the sofa. "He is really handsome – I mean, really handsome."
"Hm." King Piccolo scoffed. "By icejin standards? That doesn't mean much." He sounded annoyed… He looked annoyed.
"Oh my God…" Frikiza thought to herself excitedly. "Is he…?" She held back a grin, and continued. "Well, I always thought he was attractive. And he always tried to make me feel so special… He was so sweet, I couldn't help but adore him…" She smirked a little, watching as the anger on King Piccolo's face grew. "And he was such a gentle lover –"
"Silence!" King Piccolo roared, jumping up onto his knees to glare at Frikiza angrily. "I don't need to picture you with another man!"
"Another man?" Frikiza repeated, raising her eyebrow at him.
"I mean – with any man!" King Piccolo barked. "I don't need to picture you like that at all! It's disgusting!"
"Really…" Frikiza uttered. She looked at King Piccolo. His cheeks were slightly darkened, his teeth were gritted and his fists were clenched. … How cute. "You know… If I didn't know better, I'd say you were jealous." Frikiza giggled.
"Jealous? Ha!" King Piccolo snorted. "Don't be absurd! Why would I care if there was someone out there foolish enough to so much as look at you, let alone marry you!"
"Well, that's what I thought." Frikiza replied. "After all, you don't like me, right?"
"No I do not!" King Piccolo yelled. He didn't. He didn't like her! He had no idea why he was getting so annoyed at the thought of her with – with another man… A weak, bleeding heart little icejin sap that had got to Frikiza first… Arrgh! Why was he getting so angry? Why did he hate the idea of this 'Glazio' person marrying Frikiza?
"Well, even if you did, you wouldn't need to worry." Frikiza shrugged.
"What do you mean?" King Piccolo demanded, struggling to contain his anger.
"Well…" Frikiza looked at him. "I just said, he was a gentle lover. You know I'm not into that, it's too boring."

King Piccolo stared at Frikiza and watched as a small smirk formed on her lips and she looked at him darkly. Wickedly. Her scarlet were eyes twinkling, just like in that dream… Oh God, no! Not this again! "I like tough guys." Frikiza said. "You know, strong guys. Guys that can be aggressive, and mean… and rough."

King Piccolo's lips parted slightly as he gazed at her. Oh, she liked that in a man, did she? Someone who could be rough with her? Well of course. With a power level like hers, the only option was to be rough. What else could satisfy her?
"I would tear you apart." King Piccolo said, and as soon as he spoke the words he clasped his hands over his mouth and gasped, his eyes widening. Oh fuck… He hadn't just said that, had he? Please let it be that he had not just said that!
"Really?" Frikiza giggled, her eyes twinkling. "What makes you think you could?" Okay – okay, that wasn't fair! Either King Piccolo could admit defeat, which he never wanted to do under any circumstances, or he could respond by rising to her challenge, which he… didn't want to do. No. No, he didn't. … Oh fuck what if he did? Did he? Did he… Did he like her? No… No!
"I'm tired." King Piccolo said. "Sorry, but talking to you is boring me so much I want to go to bed."
"Is that so?" Frikiza replied, looking at him mockingly.
"Yes!" King Piccolo snapped. How dare she mock him! The repulsive little bitch! He did not like her! King Piccolo gritted his teeth in anger and rose to his feet. "Goodnight."
"Goodnight, Tough Guy." Frikiza said and winked, causing King Piccolo to freeze for a brief moment. Why had she just done that? She was mocking him. Of course she was. Next time she did that he was going to rip out her eyes! And then push her to the ground, and… Okay! Enough!
"Goodnight!" King Piccolo barked, and darted into the spare room.

Frikiza giggled to herself, blushing. He did like her, didn't he…? He just didn't want to admit it. But he did… he liked her! Frikiza's heart skipped a beat and her entire body tingled with excitement. She couldn't remember the last time she felt this happy! King Piccolo liked her! He liked her! Frikiza felt like jumping for joy – until she noticed the pile of trash King Piccolo had left on the floor.
"Dammit…" Frikiza seethed. "Piccolo!"

XXXXX

It was the middle of the night. King Piccolo had been in bed for a couple of hours now, but he was struggling to sleep. He couldn't stop thinking about Frikiza, and how infuriated he was that she had married someone else… Dammit! He shouldn't care about that! She wasn't his girlfriend, and he didn't want her to be his girlfriend, or his wife! It wasn't any concern of King Piccolo's that she had a husband – in fact, as far as he was concerned she could go back to Mr. Soft-Heart and disappear from this universe forever!

But… why did he keep thinking about it? Dammit… Maybe he did like her. Not in a personal way, of course. How could King Piccolo like Frikiza in a personal way? She was awful! She was unbearable! She was so bossy and whiny and so sickeningly sweet… ugh. King Piccolo winced in disgust. Her personality was nothing to be desired. Her body, though… Was that it? Was he simply physically attracted to her? … Well, that wasn't so bad. She was just a piece of meat, wasn't she? That didn't mean he liked her – far from it! It meant that he didn't respect her; it meant that he wanted to use her for his own gain. Actually, that sounded rather evil, didn't it? Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea after all.
"Piccolo?" King Piccolo flinched at the sound of Frikiza's voice by his bedroom door. Oh, what horrible timing…

He turned onto his side to look at Frikiza as she stood in the doorway of the spare room. "Are you still awake?" Frikiza asked.
"I couldn't sleep." King Piccolo replied. He looked at her, and he suddenly felt disgusted with himself. No… No, he couldn't like her. He couldn't even be attracted to her! It was Frikiza! It was wrong!
"Oh." Frikiza uttered. "Is the bed not comfortable?"
"Uh… yeah." King Piccolo answered. Yes, that was it. Anything to stop her knowing the true reason why he couldn't sleep. He frowned, and snorted. "Is this how you treat all your guests? You let them sleep on a worn old mattress?"
"Sorry." Frikiza giggled. "We can trade rooms if you want?"
"… No, thank you." King Piccolo replied. He didn't want to sleep in… Frikiza's bed. That would… that would be horrible. … Wouldn't it? It would smell just like her, and it would be warm where she'd just slept… No! That was repulsive!
"Okay." Frikiza shrugged. "Well then, let me make you more comfortable."
"What?" King Piccolo looked at her and his eyes widened. "Oh – no!" He snapped. "No! How many times – I don't like you!"
"Not that, Moron!" Frikiza scolded. "I meant something else. Just… lie on your front."
"Why?" King Piccolo asked cautiously.
"Just do it." Frikiza ordered, in an overly bossy tone that made King Piccolo flinch slightly. That was a little aggressive, wasn't it? … Whatever.

King Piccolo hesitated, then reluctantly obeyed and rolled onto his front. He lay there and listened out for Frikiza. He could hear her moving towards him, then he felt her weight on the bed… and then on him. She was sitting on his waist. What was she going to do…? King Piccolo didn't wait long before he got his answer. He felt her hands on his shoulders, then down his back. She was massaging him.
"Frikiza." King Piccolo growled. "Stop. I don't need this."
"It feels like you do." Frikiza replied. "How long have you had these knots? They're so hard!"
"Ow!" King Piccolo cried out as a sharp pain shot through his shoulder blade. He turned to glare up at Frikiza. "What the hell are you doing!"
"Unknotting you." Frikiza pouted. "Don't be such a baby – your muscles are all tangled up. I can't fix them without pulling them apart – and that'll hurt a little."
"You said you were going to make me more comfortable!" King Piccolo argued. "How is ripping my muscles apart making me more comfortable?"

Frikiza just giggled.
"Don't worry, it will. Just be patient. You'll thank me for this, I promise." She narrowed her eyes at him, and smirked. "You can handle a little pain, can't you?"
"Of course I can." King Piccolo growled stubbornly, and returned to lying down. Tch. Who did she think he was? Pain was no match for King Piccolo! She could rip his arms off for all he cared; he wouldn't so much as flinch.
"Good." Frikiza said. She placed her hands back on King Piccolo's shoulders, and started to dig her fingers deep into his muscles, causing the demon king to clench his fists and grit his teeth as wave upon wave of pain shot through his nerves. Dammit, was she doing this right? It wasn't supposed to hurt this much, was it? Not that he couldn't handle it. Of course he could! King Piccolo endured the treatment for what felt like a lifetime, not resisting as Frikiza annihilated every muscle in his neck, shoulders and back. He felt like he was being stabbed by an army… but he felt looser. He didn't like to admit it, but it did feel like Frikiza had done some good to him.
"… Thanks." King Piccolo mumbled reluctantly. He started to sit up, but Frikiza's hands pushed him back down.
"Not yet." Frikiza said. "I'm not done. Now it's the nice part."
"The nice part?" King Piccolo groaned. "What are you going to do, pull off my skin?" He was greeted by another giggle from Frikiza. He hated it when she did that…
"Just stay there." Frikiza instructed. "And relax."

King Piccolo let out a sigh but obeyed, settling his head against his pillow. He clenched his fists again and readied himself for more pain, but there was none. It wasn't pain, it was… something else. Warmth. Frikiza was using her ki to warm her hands as she stroked them across King Piccolo's body, using just enough pressure to stimulate every nerve. Every. Single. Nerve. Oh, that felt good… What the hell was she doing back there? "Is that okay?" Frikiza's voice came from above King Piccolo, and it didn't sound half as annoying now.
"Uh-huh…" King Piccolo grunted from the depths of his pillow. "Oh yeah…" Frikiza laughed a little, but he didn't mind it this time. So long as she kept doing whatever she was doing, she could laugh as much as she wanted. "Harder." King Piccolo ordered, becoming accustomed to the pressure she was using.
"Okay." Frikiza nodded and increased her pressure, drawing a long, low moan from King Piccolo's throat. Oh, this was bliss… King Piccolo buried his face in his pillow, grinning widely as Frikiza massaged his body. He couldn't believe he'd found a use for those tiny hands of hers. From now on this was all she was doing. Just this. She wasn't his counsellor anymore, she was his personal masseuse.

Frikiza slid her warm hands down to the bottom of King Piccolo's spine, and he frowned in annoyance when she stopped the massage there. Why had she stopped? He never gave her permission to stop! King Piccolo opened his mouth to speak, but held his breath when he felt Frikiza lean down onto him, holding her lips against his ear. "See." She breathed, causing King Piccolo's skin to tingle. "It hurts at first, when you go in really deep…" She pressed her fingers into the muscles on King Piccolo's lower back, giving him a sharp, deep sort of pain that somehow felt amazing. "But then… it feels good, doesn't it?" She started stroking his lower back quickly and forcefully, sending sharp waves of pain through King Piccolo's nerves. It hurt, but it did something else as well. King Piccolo didn't know whether it was the pressure that Frikiza was using, or the area she was targeting, but it felt so amazing it made him wish that she would never stop doing it. "And the rougher the better… don't you think?"
"Uh-huh…" King Piccolo uttered. What was she saying, exactly…? He had the feeling she wasn't just talking about massage anymore.
"King Piccolo…" Frikiza whispered into his ear, causing the demon king to freeze. This again…? "Do you think you can be rough with me, Sire…?" Ohhh… this again. Just like in that dream. Wait… King Piccolo thought for a moment.
"… Oh, fuck." He sighed, and as soon as King Piccolo spoke the words he found himself lying on his back, staring up at the ceiling with Frikiza nowhere in sight.

Dammit! That had by far been the best thing that had ever happened to his body, and it had just been a stupid dream! Tch. Great. King Piccolo rolled onto his front and lay there in frustration, furious at himself for having such a dream in the first place, and furious for waking up and destroying it. Why had he had such a dream anyway? He didn't want a stupid backrub – and definitely not off Frikiza! It was that conversation that they'd had earlier, and her talking about having sex with her husband… Why had she done that? Why would anyone do that? King Piccolo did not want to hear about Frikiza's personal life, it was disgusting! Frikiza was disgusting! And he did not like her, not the slightest bit! He didn't even like her body – actually, her body was the worst thing about her because it was small and lizard-like. She was too short, and her tail was too long, and her horns were too sharp. Her eyes were too red, her lips were too black, her hands were too small, her boobs were… … Well actually they weren't bad… but the rest of her was terrible! Absolutely repulsive! Tch. Fuck this. King Piccolo was thirsty. He was getting a drink – after all, he might as well make the most of Frikiza's kitchen while he had the chance. He would take everything she owned and leave her with nothing to survive on. Ha! Take that, Lizard-Girl. King Piccolo climbed out of bed and made his way into the kitchen.

He headed straight for the fridge, almost as instinctively as a saiyan. King Piccolo opened the door and gazed upon its contents. Hm… Frikiza didn't have much in the way of soft drinks – did icejins ever drink anything except wine? Or maybe it was just Frieza and his family that were alcoholics. Anyway… King Piccolo didn't feel like drinking wine – not that he could get drunk off it. He couldn't get drunk; he was too strong! He pulled out a few cans of melon soda and took a seat at the breakfast bar, and drank two cans without even taking a breath in between. King Piccolo belched loudly, and then crushed the empty cans in his palms. Stupid Frikiza. Stupid icejin. Stupid dream. King Piccolo let out an angry sigh and looked around at the room, wondering if he should chance going back to bed. What if he had another dream? He didn't want one. He didn't even like seeing Frikiza in real life, and especially not in his dreams! She seemed to be a lot more forward in dream-land. A lot more sexual. It was disgusting.
"Piccolo?" Oh, great… This was all he needed. King Piccolo looked up at the sound of Frikiza's voice, and his eyes widened. Yeah… Disgusting…

Frikiza was standing in the kitchen doorway, wearing what was almost her usual night clothes. It was a vest, as usual, with that chest of hers on show, but… she wasn't wearing shorts. Just underwear. Black underwear. Black, with kind of a skirt thing around the top – a piece of fabric that went all around the top of her knickers. What was that? It was ridiculous. Just one more thing to get in the way – no! King Piccolo didn't mean that. What he meant was, it was one more thing to tug at – dammit! He downed his third can of melon soda, and stared at Frikiza.
"Hi." King Piccolo grunted, unable to say anything else. He wanted to look away. Why wasn't he looking away?
"Couldn't sleep?" Frikiza smiled, approaching the breakfast bar. Oh, she was coming towards him. Why was she doing that? Why wasn't she going back to bed?
"No." King Piccolo answered.
"You know, eight cans of soda won't help you sleep." Frikiza said sternly, looking at the collection of melon sodas King Piccolo had in front of him.
"I… don't want to sleep." King Piccolo replied, secretly thankful that Frikiza being so close to him was blocking his view of her bottom half, which was concealed behind the bar top.
"Well, that's just as well." Frikiza said. She walked past him towards the large wine rack that was on the kitchen wall, causing King Piccolo to groan a little. Now she had her back to him, and all he could stare at was her butt and those tiny black – whatever they were! Some kind of weird underwear with a skirt. He wanted to take them off. He hated them that much he wanted to rip them off!

Frikiza didn't seem to notice King Piccolo's staring as she poured herself a glass of wine and took a sip, leaving a moist glow on her lips that would no doubt taste of wine… Oh, God! Fuck it. Why was he even denying it? He liked her. King Piccolo liked Frikiza. He had no idea why. He hated her personality, and she wasn't attractive, but… He just… He wanted to… Dammit! "Anyway." Frikiza broke King Piccolo out of his thoughts, and she looked at him. "I'm going back to bed." She said. "Goodnight."
"Night." King Piccolo grunted.

Frikiza started to make her way towards the kitchen door, when she stopped.
"Oh…" She turned and looked at King Piccolo. "Do you mind if I turn the heating up? It got cold all of a sudden."
"I didn't notice…" King Piccolo mumbled, staring at her body once more. Well maybe if she actually put some clothes on she wouldn't be cold!
"Well do you mind?" Frikiza asked.
"No, go ahead." King Piccolo answered, still staring at her. Oh, those hips of hers were so wide… That ass was so firm, and those thighs were so toned. Those breasts were so big, those lips, those eyes, that neck… Fuck! "But…" King Piccolo uttered. "If you want I could… warm you up?"

Frikiza stared at King Piccolo, and he stared back. He wasn't sure why he had just said that. Why had he just said that…? … Actually, he knew why. They both knew why. He wanted to follow Frikiza into her room. He wanted to follow her into her bed… and he wanted to fuck her. "What do you think?" King Piccolo asked, looking at Frikiza.
"Well… that depends." Frikiza answered cautiously. "Do you have… 'food poisoning'?"

King Piccolo smirked slightly, and sniggered. Cocky little bitch… She was still saying that, huh? She would pay for that. If she agreed to this, it would be the worst thing she would ever do.
"No." He answered. "No, I don't."
"I see." Frikiza uttered. She paused for a moment, then smiled. "Well then… Let's go, I'm cold." She turned her back to King Piccolo and walked out of the room, with the lustful demon following closely behind.