Title: Tainted Star

Chapter 14

Author: Phoenix

Rating: M for strong sexual themes, violence and language.

Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or anything having do with it.

A/N: Thank you to my awesome beta kitaleigh! Important: JackyKay brought something up in her review that I would like to address. I am not condoning the way Rachel was bullied in the past, I actually haven't dealt with it for a reason because it will be brought up within this chapter was well as the next one and maybe a few after. It will actually be an on going topic. No one wanted to face it before but now that they see how bullying in effecting Rachel they have that answered your concerns JackyKay and thank you for bringing this to my attention your review was wonderful :) Anymore question from anyone please feel free to PM!

The nurse shook her head when Santana entered her office for the second time that day. She was currently fixing up Lexi's nose, which despite the girl's protest that it was because Santana was as she quoted an "animal" wasn't broken. Santana had a few bruises and swollen knuckles but other then that the Latina come out practically unharmed, but what else could you expect form a badass like her?

Once in Figgins' office the opposing sides were made to sit across from each other as they waited for their parents to arrive. Maria Lopez arrived first, followed quickly by Jennifer Rolland, Lexi's mother. They both looked confused and concerned by their daughter's current appearances. They sat in the crowded office and waited while each girl told their side of the story, both parents becoming angrier and angrier.

Maria Lopez was conflicted, she was proud of her daughter for standing up to Lexi and protecting those close to her. On the other hand she knew she could not condone the way Santana had chose to handle it.

Sue Sylvester was also in the room on the side of her head Cheerio's and for some reason Ms. Thompson was there on the side of Lexi, who was undoubtedly one of her favorite students. Ms. Thompson backed up Lexi's side of the story and claimed that both Rachel and Santana are troublemakers who are always starting fights unprovoked and are disruptive during class time.

"Now that we have given you both the chance to explain your side, I have an anonymous video of what had taken place in the hallway." Figgins told them holding up the flash drive in which said video was stored upon. Lexi's eyes went wide at the evidence that would prove that she had exaggerated her side and proved Santana's innocence.

"Anonymous my ass, it was that Jewfro creeper Jacob Ben Israel who has stalked my girlfriend since the second grade." Santana sneered as those in the room who knew who he was grimaced. Mrs. Rolland made a face at the word girlfriend and Figgins gave Santana a warning look before playing the video on the computer screen.

Everyone watched in shock as the scene unfolded from the beginning of the confrontation to the end where Santana rushed over to try to console her distraught girlfriend. Coach Sylvester stood there completely stoic with an unreadable expression.

"Where's the bear?" The coach asked her voice completely void of emotion. Lexi's eyes went wide, it was never a good sign when Sue got that tone.

"I... I..." she stumbled.

"I have it coach, the little Cheerio Rolland's gave it to hold on to grew a soul and gave it back." Quinn informed them, pulling the black bear out of her bag before safely tucking it away again. Santana looked at it with relief as Sue nodded stiffly.

"That little traitor." Lexi mumbled under her breath, but everyone heard it loud and clear.

"No, Rollands you're the traitor. Though I do admire your drive and ability to claw your way to the top with your weirdly deformed lemur claws," both Lexi and her mother's mouths dropped, as Santana and Quinn snickered.

"I will not put up with the mutiny against your captain and your second in command because going against them is like going against me and no one goes against me. I will also not put up with the the downright torment of your fellow teammates or you teammate's significant other. Especially when even I can admit that Streisand here has been through enough. So effective today, you are off the Cheerio's until you can change your attitude. Turn in your uniform tomorrow morning." Sue said as she left the room, not even giving the stunned girl a chance to respond.

"Principle Figgins, you can not allow this to happen. This delinquent attacked my daughter and she's the one being punished?" Mrs. Rolland asked in outrage.

"Hold on just a minute! I may not approve of how Santana lashed out, but she is not a delinquent. Your daughter is far from innocent from what I saw on that video," Maria defended her daughter ready to go toe to toe with his woman if need be. She knew Santana was far from innocent and judging by Lexi's face, her daughter had done some damage, but she also knew the kind-hearted person that lay just beneath her 'badass' exterior and she knew that Santana had been provoked.

"My daughter was being a normal teenager, if your daughter and her little girlfriend," she spat out the last word with disgust. "Can't take a little teasing and a harmless prank, then they have a huge wake up call in life. They will have a hell of a lot more of it considering their lifestyle choice," Santana was about to jump up and inform the ignorant woman how it wasn't a choice, but her mother held up a hand to stop her.

"What I saw on that video was not a little teasing, it was downright harassment. Not only is it going beyond the normal teenage bullying, but she stole from my daughter's girlfriend and that threat you made, you may not believe it to be serious, but I can assure you it is very serious," Maria said venomously. It was almost as if she were a mother bear, protecting her cubs.

"Hold up, I didn't steal anything, someone else took that bear out of her bag, and that wasn't even a threat it was a joke that meant nothing," Lexi tried to defend herself, crossing her arms over her chest and leaning back in her seat with a cocky smile. She really believed being kicked off the Cheerio's was that worst they could do to her and she didn't even believe that would last long. Sue needed her if she wanted another championship win and there was no way they'd be able to replace her in time.

"But you told them to do it and I'm sure your so called friends will give you up in a second," Lexi paled a little because she knew Quinn was right, her very own little minion had already traded her in, there was no doubt the rest would do the same if they Sue threatened them. "Also that threat and it was a threat, will be taken very seriously by the police for sexual harassment," at that she went completely pale before her stare hardened again.

"Well if I go down for sexual harassment, Santana will just go down harder for assault," Lexi said smugly making both cheerleaders growl.

"Enough. There is no need to get the police involved" Figgin's protested more concerned with the reputation of the school. Both parents agreed, neither wanted their daughter to be in that much trouble.

"Alright Ms. Lopez, you are suspended for two days effective tomorrow, followed by two weeks of detention." Santana sighed knowing she couldn't fight it. Lexi smiled and giggle at the darker girls expense.

"Not so fast, Ms. Rolland, you are also suspended for two days, followed by two weeks detention," Lexi's eyes went comically wide.

"What? That's so unfair!" she yelled jumping out of her seat.

"I believe it is very fair. We take this type of harassment very seriously," Figgins said sternly, causing Quinn and Santana to roll their eyes knowing that if there wasn't a physical fight he wouldn't be doing anything about it, however, they were still grateful she was still getting punished they were almost afraid Figgins was going to let her get away with it.

"You are also to stay away from Ms. Lopez and Ms. Berry. Ms. Lopez, it would also be wise for both you and Ms. Berry to avoid contact with Ms. Rolland as well." Figgins declared, making them both nod their heads solemnly.

"Yes sir," Lexi grumbled.

"Not gonna be a problem for me," Santana stated, more then happy to avoid the psychopathic bitch.

The meeting was adjourned and Ms. Thompson was asked to remain behind. She knew she was in for it, this was the second time she was caught singling out Rachel. Lexi and her mother left the room first, as Figgins called to Maria before they left to go find Rachel and Brittany.

"Mrs. Lopez, could you please ask the Abrams' to come and see me? At least one of them should be in Ms. Pillsbury's office with Ms. Berry," Maria nodded leading the girl out of the room and towards the guidance councilors office.

They found Rachel cuddled close to Brittany as both Ms. Pillsbury and Tim Abrams tried to talk to her. Kara was unable to get off work because she could not cancel on her patients, but she's been told about the situation and she was extremely unhappy about it.

Both Santana and Quinn wanted to reach out to the catatonic girl, but they were afraid of how she would react. Maria went up to Tim and whispered in his ear, causing him to nod and kneel down next to Rachel.

"Rach, I'm going to go have a chat with Principle Figgins, but I'll be right back, okay?" he asked and when he got no response, he sighed and left. Santana wanted to reach out to her girlfriend desperately. She looked to Ms. Pillsbury for guidance, and the red headed counselor nodded encouragingly.

"Rae-Rae? Can you talk to me, baby?" she asked placing her hand on the girls forearm but quickly retracted it when her small girlfriend flinched away violently, burying herself further into Brittany. Santana felt the tears flow freely down her cheeks. She never wanted Rachel to react that way when she touched her. It gave her the most awful feeling inside to watch the girl she loved pull away from her.

"Can I try?" Quinn asked timidly, hoping maybe she could get Rachel to listen. Ms. Pillsbury nodded, but you could tell by her eyes that she didn't believe it would do much.

"Hey Rach, why don't you tell us what's wrong sweetie? So we can help you," Quinn tried reaching out but only received the same response as Santana, only this time she started shaking. Quinn backed away quickly with tears in her eyes as Brittany rocked and cooed to the girl in her arms gently, calming her rather quickly.

"That's how she's been since she got here. She'll only let Brittany touch her but she won't answer anyone even Brittany," Ms. Pillsbury told them sadly.

Everyone was worried including Brittany, though she was only a little more content then the others because she was able to provide some form of comfort to the little diva. Being allowed to touch her friend was the only thing keeping her from crying hysterically.

"Alright, I was able to get a hold of Dr. Cordell and she wants to see you straight away Rachel," Tim said, entering the office after having finished his meeting with Figgins in which he was informed of the situation and shown the video.

Brittany tried to remove herself from the small body attached to her, but Rachel whimpered and held on tighter, causing Brittany to immediately stop moving away to wrap her arms back around her. Santana felt a flare of jealousy towards her best friend that she never thought she would have against the tall blonde. She had certainly been jealous of other people because she once thought she was in love with the dancer. But that love was no where near what she felt for Rachel and seeing her wanting Brittany over her and not even being allowed to comfort her was really making her jealous of her best friend. She had to bite her tongue to keep from saying something because she knew if Rachel was at all aware of what was going on around her at this point it only upset her more. It would also upset Brittany and though she may be jealous of her right now, she didn't want to upset her. Quinn seemed to notice the spark in her friends eyes and placed a comforting hand on the Latina's shoulder, which she was grateful for as it helped her calm down a bit.

"Do you want Brittany to come with us?" Tim asked carefully and they got the first response from Rachel since the hallway as she nodded. Ms. Pillsbury was quickly on the phone with Brittany's parents to get permission to dismiss her. After she explained the situation the Dutch girls's parent quickly gave the okay for her to be dismissed and go with them to Rachel's emergency appointment.

After everything was settled, Quinn went back to class after making Santana promise to call her and let her know when she could come over to be there for Rachel and to let her know of any updates.

Jill took Rachel back immediately, allowing Brittany in as well because Rachel still refused to let go of the tall blonde. Santana paced nervously in the waiting room as Tim and Maria fidgeted in their seats. After about half an hour Jill emerged from the room and because their was no one else in the small waiting room she decided it would be okay to talk to them here.

"Hello Mr. Abrams," she greeted her old friend with a hand shake and looked towards the nervous teenager. "You must be Santana?" she asked holding out her hand, which Santana quickly shook while nodding her head.

"Yes, and this is my mother Maria Lopez," she introduced and Jill shook her hand as well.

"Brittany explained what happened today, because Rachel is not speaking at all. Though she doesn't know how Rachel's hands were burned," Jill told them.

"I caught her in the bathroom running them under scolding hot water. She told me Lexi was making fun of her specifically calling her Manhands and telling her I was going to leave her because she wasn't a real girl," Santana explained the fist clenching at the fresh memory. Tim and Maria's mouths dropped in shock. "She said she was trying to fix them and when I calmed her down, she realized that she was physically hurting the part of her that was verbally attacked," Jill nodded and made a note in her pad.

"I will speak with her about that more in depth when we get her past this. Now I think Rachel is attaching herself to Brittany because she is the one who went to her first when she was starting to become upset, but I think there's a little more to this. Santana, I hate to ask this, but did you and Rachel always get along?" There was a long pause as Santana's eyes went wide and she squirmed uncomfortably. Maria watched her daughter with great interest and a sense of dread. She thought the whole glee club got along, at least that's how Santana always made it sound.

"No. I don't like admitting it or even thinking about it, but I bullied Rachel for a very long time before we became friends" Santana confessed a feeling of shame over coming her as she dropped her head so she wouldn't meet anyone's eyes.

"Santana Alejandra Lopez! Please tell me you are not being serious?" Maria demanded, glaring at her only daughter. She and her husband have always tried to instill in their children that bullying is wrong. She knew they were a sarcastic and snarky family, but she never thought her own daughter would use that to become a bully.

"It's true," she said tears streaming down her face. "I was afraid of my feelings for her and she was at the bottom and I was on the top. If I didn't join in then people would start to become suspicious and I was just too afraid to of being who I was. Rachel was the most bullied kid in school, Kurt got a lot of it, but for a very long time Rachel didn't even have friends, he did have at least that. Brittany was the only one who went of her way to be nice to her. She was sneaky about it and she told us that Rachel was her ninja friend." She laughed remembering when Brittany had told her that, it was a little after Santana finally confessed her feelings to her and Quinn.

"That actually explains a lot. Seeing you act out the way you did in the hall brought back memories of her father's abuse, but it also brought back the abuse she use to get from everyone else including you. She knows deep down that you would never hurt her, but right now her mind can't rationalize that" she explained and the guilt and despair in Santana's eyes killed everyone.

Maria was extremely disappointed in her daughter, but right now wasn't the time to deal with that. Right now Rachel needed them all to be level headed and strong. After listening to Santana, she also understood a little more that when you're that scared of your feelings and have no one to talk to about it, it can turn you into someone you're not.

"Santana, no matter what I'm saying now, this isn't your fault. Lexi is the one who beat her down to this point, seeing you violently act out was her breaking point because she doesn't want to see the one she loves that way. Do you understand me?" Santana nodded though the guilt was still there in her eyes and Jill sighed.

"I'm going to talk to Rachel for a little while longer. Hopefully I can break her out of this trance and we can go from there." They all nodded and Tim thanked her. She smiled sadly as she patted Santana on the shoulder and re-entered the room with Brittany and Rachel.

"Mami?" Santana said looking at her mother in shame.

"I am extremely disappointed in you Santana." the younger Latina nodded closing her eyes in shame.

"But, I do understand that you were afraid. I remember how scared you were when you finally came out to us. I don't approve of the way you handled it, but right now we're going to leave it because Rachel needs us. We'll talk more about this at another time," Santana nodded feeling somewhat relieved that her mother didn't hate her. She sat down and continued to stare at the door, wishing for nothing more then to be able to be on the other side holding her girlfriend and inhaling her sweet scent.

Rachel felt like there were a million different things going on in her head at once. All of Lexi's taunts continued to assault her mind, but they weren't in the cruel cheerleaders voice, instead they took on the voice of her sweet girlfriend's, reminding her that she was once her tormentor as well. She fought to remind herself that Santana was no longer that person, but it seemed the harder she fought, the louder the voices got.

She was aware of everything going on around her, she knew she was at Dr. Cordell's office wrapped protectively in Brittany's arms. She could hear Dr. Cordell speaking to her, trying to gage some sort of reaction from the diva. But she didn't trust herself to speak, she was so afraid of what would come out if she did. She knew Santana would never physically hurt her, but seeing her act out the way she did frightened her. She had been on the receiving end of the Latina's verbal abuse, and she was learning to move on from that, but she never wanted to see her react violently. It reminded her so much of her farther and every time she thought about it she went right back to that house where mental and physical abuse was just part of the daily routine.

"Rachel, Santana told me about the bullying." Jill said as Rachel's head shot up, her eyes suddenly focusing as she returned from her catatonic state.

"She shouldn't have told you that, it's in the past. It doesn't matter anymore." Rachel tried to argue though she knew her voice was to quiet and soft to hold any truth.

"I think it does." the psychologist prompted as Rachel began shaking her head frantically.

"She's right Rae, you keep saying you forgive us for everything and I believe you really think you have, but it still affects you. When Santana gets all mean because she wants to protect you, you get scared because that's how she used to act towards you and your dad was really scary like San was today." Brittany spoke up causing both women to look up at the simple minded blonde.

"It's okay to feel this way you know, it's normal. But you need to talk about it or you're going to continue feeling icky about it and your going to continue pushing Santana away and that will make you both really sad and I hate it when my friends are sad, it makes me sad too," Rachel smiled up at Brittany and cupped the blonde's cheek.

"You were never really apart of the bullying Britt, you did what you had to, but then you always found a way to show me you never really meant it. I never considered you a part of people who were mean to me," Rachel explained causing Brittany to smile and take the hand cupping her cheek and kissing it.

"I'm happy you know I never wanted to mean to you." Jill watched the girls with great interest and amazement and concluded that this wasn't just a friendship, it was a sisterhood.

"But you need to talk to San about all of this." Rachel looked down nervously, she didn't know if she could do that.

"I want to, but she really scared me. I'm still scared, when she reacted like that all I could think of was how my dad used to get when he was mad. Now I'm afraid that is all I will see when I look at her." Rachel confessed, tears finally breaking free from their prison.

"This is normal Rachel, acts of violence will bring these memories back. But you have the power now, fight back and take control. Santana loves you and she only wants to protect you because that's what you do for the people you love." Jill started to explain. "Did she do it the wrong way? Yes, she did. Just take a few days and remind yourself of everything you love about her and everything loving she has done for you, and when you're ready you need to talk to her about everything, including the past bullying." Rachel sighed, this was such a long process. She hated that she was scared of the one person who actually loved her for who she was. She despised her father for doing this to her, for making her feel so helpless and taking away any her ability to feel safe and secure. She knew that Santana loved her, she'd proved it in multiple ways, she just couldn't bring herself to believe that someone as special as Santana was in love with someone as sordid as herself.

Both Brittany and Jill could tell that Rachel was still hiding within herself, but they knew they had at least broken through the top barrier that had form over the past few hours. Now most of it was up to Santana and Rachel.

The Lopez's did not ground Santana for the fight with Lexi, they had decided that the suspension and the detentions were enough punishment. Her main punishment was that Rachel was still not talking to the Latina, which broke her heart into a million pieces. She'd moped around the house like someone had kicked her puppy ever since they'd gotten back from Dr. Cordell's office. They couldn't help but feel for their daughter. The two days of her suspension when by slowly, but when she was finally able to return to school she felt a nervous excitement take over because she was finally being able to see her girlfriend and have a chance to make this right. Walking into homeroom though, she immediately deflated as she noticed Rachel was sitting in the far corner by herself. She was just thankful Lexi had been moved to a different homeroom, as she dishearteningly plopped herself down in her seat next to Puck.

"She's been ignoring everyone who isn't Brittany. The diva twins tried to corner her and make her talk, but Quinn blew up at them and they backed down. I think you're the only one whose going to get through to her." Puck informed her as Santana kept stealing glances back of her closed off girlfriend.

"I know, I just don't know how." she answered defectively. Puck gave her a supportive pat on the shoulder.

"You will San, Rachel loves you too much to not at least give you a chance." Puck tried to encourage as Santana prayed he was right.

Having almost every class with Rachel was one of the best things about her schedule, and she was going to try to use that to her advantage to talk to the diva. But she always managed to get there before her and isolate herself in the corner of the room where there was no room to sit beside her. Santana sighed as she took her seat next to Quinn feeling defeated and wanting to cry because she was almost sure she had lost her girlfriend.

"Don't you dare even think that" Quinn demanded.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Santana asked not really in the mood to play mind games.

"Don't you dare think that you lost her." Santana looked up at one of her best friends with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh please don't act so surprised, I know you way too well and that look on your face is telling me you've given up." The head cheerleader said before sighing.

"You can't give up because that what she wants. Don't you see S, Rachel is looking for reasons to go back into herself and if she believes for one second you've given up on her and moved on then she will continue to retreat into herself until she's even blocking Brittany out. We were so close to having the old midget back and even though she's way too loud and bossy, I can honestly say I miss her." Santana sighed and ran her hand through her ponytail, she knew Quinn was right, but she had no idea how to fix this. She never thought she would have to convince her own girlfriend to not be afraid of her. Suddenly an idea came to her as she smiled causing Quinn to quark and eyebrow.

"I've got an idea, but I'm going to need your help." Santana began to explain her idea and Quinn couldn't help but smile herself. They were going to win Rachel's trust back.

The plan was set into motion the next day as Rachel walked into school with Brittany glued to her side. Brittany knew she couldn't force the diva to deal with her emotions, but she definitely wasn't going to abandon her friend when she needed her. For now, she was just going to be there for her anyway she could. As they approached the brunette's locker, Brittany smiled as she noticed the note taped to the locker and knew that Santana had set her plan in motion. Rachel looked at it confusingly and then up at Brittany, who only nodded and motioned for her to open it. She found herself unable to contain the smile as she recognized Santana familiar perfect script on the yellow paper.

Rae-Rae,

You deserve the world and more. I wish I could take away everything bad in this world so that it can never touch you. I know I can't and I hate that it had already touched you and that I was a part of that. You are the reason I get up in the morning and will always be the only one for me. I can never say sorry enough for forcing you back to that dark place. You have to know that was never my intention. I just wanted to protect you, you mean the world to me and if anything were to take it away, I would die. I love you with everything that I am, I would give my life for you. I don't want you to forgive me because I know I don't deserve that, I just want you to know you are the brightest star and without you I would be completely lost because I would have no light to guide my way. I hope you will give me the chance to see your light again because without it, I'm nothing.

I love you forever, Estrella,

Santana

Rachel found herself caught between a sob and a laugh. The letter was so sweet and sappy she knew Santana put away a lot of her pride to write this very unbadass letter. It made her heart thump a little faster and gave her those butterflies she had been missing the past few days. It wasn't enough to make the uneasy feeling go away, but it was definitely a start. When she opened her locker, she was shocked to find a box of vegan candies. She only briefly wondered how they managed to break into her locker as she ran her hand over the box before tucking it away for later. Brittany smiled as she noticed a small glimpse of light return to the tiny diva's eyes, she wasn't sure if Rachel was ready to forgive her best friend, but she knew it was a start. She'd give anything to take away Rachel's pain and she knew that Santana was the only one that could do that.

Finn jogged up to Rachel after her and Brittany parted ways. He put on his infamous crooked boyish smile as he leaned up against the wall next to her.

"Hey Rach, I heard what Lexi did and I just wanted to say I'm sorry. I never expected her to do anything like that. I swear if I knew what she was going to do I would have stopped her." He told her as Rachel shifted nervously next to him.

"Thank you Finn." She accepted his apology as she tried to make her way into her classroom, but he blocked her way with his large frame.

"I was hoping I could take you out and make it up to you. I miss you Rach." He said, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. Rachel sighed looking up at her ex-boyfriend.

"No Finn, I already told you I don't like you that way. I'm still with Santana, we may be in a hard place right now but I still love her." she told him truthfully. She saw anger flash in his eyes and she took a step back and tried to keep herself from panicking. She'd seen that anger before, it was the same look her father had gotten before he stuck. The same wild look Santana had possessed before she pounced at Lexi. The same look that haunted her every night as she tried to sleep.

"That slut scared you so much you're avoiding her. I would never ever make you feel that way Rachel." He told her desperately holding on to her shoulder as she shook in fear.

"No, you just teamed up with the girl who tormented me, thinking that would get my attention. You don't really love me Finn, you love the attention I give you. If you really did care about me, you wouldn't have kept breaking up with me when it was convenient for you, just move on please."

With that Rachel broke out of Finn's light grip and walked into her class, leaving the tall boy standing there stunned.

Throughout the day Rachel kept getting these little cards and gifts placed at her desk and her confrontation with Finn was completely forgotten. With each one she blushed more and more and more light returned to the recently dim brown eyes. There were even a few from her friends expressing everything they felt.

Rach,

I don't and never will deserve any of your forgiveness. I was jealous of you, that's why I did all of those horrible things to you. You're so confident in yourself and you know where you're going in life, I didn't at the time. I know now because of you, I want to be a photographer, I always hide my passion from everyone because I was afraid I wasn't good enough. But you found my secret stash of photo's and make me feel like I'm Ansel Addams. I also thought you had the perfect family, but I was wrong about that and I wish I had looked a little closer. I took my own father's hatred out on you and you had to deal with even worse at your own home. You somehow became my best friend and I hate seeing you like this. I just want my best friend back, I need my best friend back.

Love,

Quinn

Rachel couldn't help but smile at that letter, she was so happy Quinn has decided to pursue what she loved and was amazing at. If she was honest with herself Quinn had become her best friend as well, beside Santana of course. She was to Rachel what Brittany was to Santana.

Rae,

I hate it when you're sad and now San is sad too. I also hate how afraid you are. I wish I could make all the monsters in your life go away. I'll even come over to your house every night to check under your bed to make sure they didn't come back if I had to. I know you're letting me be near yo, and that's the only thing that's keeping me from being really sad and crying. I want to be strong for you because you're so small and cute. I wish I knew how to make you realize none of us would ever hurt you the way your dad did. We love you too much.

Love,

Britt

Rachel smiled again the innocence in Brittany's letter. But there was also wisdom, she was so emotionally put together it was scary sometimes. She hated that she was hurting them, but she just didn't know how not to be scared. The other letters were from the rest of the glee club with the exception of Finn. Sam's letter consisted of little jokes and lots of Avatar quotes that made her smile, Mercedes and Kurt wrote one together telling her how much they missed their fellow diva and how she needed to get better because NYADA was calling their names. Puck's letter made her tear up a little when he called her his Jewish princess and told her, he would never let anyone hurt her ever again. The final letter hit her the hardest and made her realize that she needed to get better.

Rachel,

I can honestly say I never paid much attention to you before you started hanging out with the Unholy Trinity. I thought you were a diva and that's all I really tried to find out about you. I learned how wrong I was though. You are such an amazing person and I wish I never let myself judge you just because everyone else was doing it. I hate what happened to you, but I'm not sorry that it brought you to my family. You are the missing piece that was haunting us. You are not my foster sister, you ARE my sister, and I want to protect you the way a brother should.

Love your brother,

Artie

She tucked the letters away in her backpack and headed to her last class to find Santana had beaten her there. She was surprised that the Latina didn't try to capture her attention and seemed to be respecting her space for now. She looked at her desk to find a stuffed bear placed on top of her desk holding yet another card. She looked over to Santana who was trying to discreetly look back at the diva, however the minute she noticed the diva looking at her she looked away blushing. Rachel had to hold back a chuckle at the image of the fierce Latina going into a Build-A-Bear store to make this bear herself. That in itself made her heart melt as she picked up the letter and began to read it.

Rae-Rae,

I know you have your father's bear back, which I am extremely grateful for. This bear isn't meant to be a better model or to replace the special bond you have with the one your daddy gave you. This is meant to be our bear, it's a winter bear because we got together in the winter. I know that may sound dumb but the minute I saw it, I thought of that day at the river. How it was really cold but my heart felt so warm once you said those three words back to me. I also thought me sort of making the bear and kissing the heart stuffed inside it would make it even more special to you. I hope you will be able to hold this bear and think of me when I'm not able to hold you. I want you to always feel safe and maybe with your father's bear as well as our bear watching over you, you will make you always feel protected.

I love you forever Estrella,

Santana

Rachel covered her mouth to keep herself from crying, she looked at the blue bear with snowflakes covering it and felt that warmth in her heart that Santana was talking about. It was really starting to remind her how safe she really felt with Santana. She looked over at the Latina to notice her now openly watching her with concerned eyes. Rachel smiled at her and Santana felt her heart jump, that was the first smile she had seen on Rachel beautiful face in three days. It was truly one that could just brighten a whole room.

Rachel mouthed "choir room" to the cheerleader who nodded in understanding. They would meet there during last period, which was free period for both of them and finally talk.

Santana paced nervously outside the choir room as she tried to build up the courage to go in. This was the moment she had been waiting for, for three days. She'd been waiting to talk to Rachel and get this all straightened out, but she couldn't bring herself to open the door, to where she knew Rachel was already waiting on the other side for her. She knew it was a slim chance, but she couldn't help but worry that Rachel had changed her mind. The she was still terrified of her and had decided that they couldn't be together anymore. Santana felt tears stinging in her eyes as she shakily reached for the door handle.

"Just go in San" The Latina looked up to find Brittany standing there with her arms crossed over her chest giving her that stern yet encouraging look that only the dancer could give.

"What if I do something to screw it up even more? I can't lose her Britt." Santana whimpered.

"The only way you're going to lose her is if you don't go in that room and fix this. She loves you San, I saw her eyes become brighter with every note she got from you today. You just need to remind her of how good you make her feel." Brittany told her with innocent wisdom making Santana smile.

"You're right, here goes nothing" she said going to open the door, but before she did she turned back to her blonde friend.

"Thanks for everything Britt-Britt. I'm so thankful that Rae had you to lean on through all of this." She said.

"Anytime San, you know Rachel means just as much to me as she does to you." The blonde smiled.

Santana beamed as she slowly turned the doorknob. "You better be going to class, Britt, Rachel will kill me if she finds out you skipped."

"Oh I know I'm going, just needed to make sure you didn't wimp out." She winked before skipping away. Santana scoffed before taking a deep breath and opening the door to the choir room, it was now or never.