Enigma

Disclaimer: I do not own Divergent

Chapter 14: O'Death

The rest of the week was fear simulation. I've been practicing of solving my fears that were time consuming or complicated. These fear landscapes were much intense if not so realistic. If you die in the landscape, the aftermath stays with you for an hour. So falling and missing the cable to jerk awake on the metal chair while my legs fucking hurt. And let's not forget Phoenix on my back in order to get the top five… for a damn communication job with home base.

Anymore of these fear simulation and I might actually go insane. Just offed myself for no more nightmares, if not get this damn world off my back. Yet I keep the mask on. Acting like nothing is a problem. I was having breakfast with the gang, hardly eating it. Four felt the same with his four fears in all.

"You okay?" Zeke asked Four.

"I'm fine," Four replied harshly.

"Oh, clearly," Zeke said with a grin. "It's okay to not be okay, you know."

"Yeah, right," Four muttered as he continued to eat his food.

"Just one more days and it's done." I said.

"Good, because I'm tired of facing my fears." Shauna shuddered.

"I second that," Lauren muttered.

"Third," Edgar joined in.

After breakfast Zeke, Four, and I put our trays away. When we're heading to the Pit, Zeke's kid brother, Uriah came up to us out of breath. Getting a better look of Uriah, he appeared to be taller than his age. Any year now he would have Zeke running for his money if his kid brother beats him in the heights department. Zeke and Four were laughing at Uriah's disposition as the boy appeared stunned.

"Amar," Uriah panted. "Amar is . . . Amar is dead."

Immediately the boys shut up. What? Did he just say Amar is dead? That is impossible. We saw him last week, how can he be dead. Unless… Amar has been absent from the rest of training, Phoenix taking charge of the transfers while Tori getting involved in the fear simulations all of the sudden.

"What? What do you mean, he's dead?" Four asked.

"A Dauntless woman found a body on the ground near the Pire early this morning," Uriah explained. "They just identified it, It was Amar. He . . . he must have . . . "

"Jumped?" Zeke finished.

"Or fell, no one knows," Uriah said.

Four started moving towards the climbing wall towards the Pit. I followed after him, as we both started climbing up to the top. We passed the children fooling around, climbed the staircase that dangled over the glass ceiling. There was a crowd in the Pire lobby. Four and I shoved our ways through the crowd getting a few colorful words and elbows till reaching the edge of the glass wall. When I looked down of the street that surround the Dauntless compound to see a small patch of blood. The area sectioned off by tape.

Growing up in Candor, I've seen crime scene photos of murders. Sometimes when a trial is commence, the defendant under the influence of truth serum can be vague or the sheer man slaughter can be erratic. So crime scene evidence may be used when a murder is involved.

Blood is something I also gotten used too. After beating people up to a point blood is spilt on the mat after flesh meets face. But now the sight of blood down below wasn't from a crime. This was Amar's blood smeared on the pavement. Yet this doesn't make sense. Amar wasn't suicidal. Over the month since I know him there were no signs of depression.

I stare at Four concerned about him. He and Amar were very close or at least the mentor and protégé relationship. Similar to what Phoenix and I have. Thinking about this, all of these previous events this past month happen after Four had to redo his fear landscape. When Jeanie Matthews, Max, Amar, Four, and other Erudites came to investigate some sort of glitch? Let alone Four saying, Amar had to take his fear landscape.

Could it possibly be Dauntless killed Amar for something he knows or…divergent.

I won't know until I get the job that qualify me into their severs.

.o0o.

A memorial service was held in the Chasm for Amar. Everyone was drunk by the afternoon. The gang and I gathered around the chasm, as Zeke passed around red cups filled with alcohol. He handed me on which I took a sip, cringing at the strong taste. When Four got his cup, it seemed to sooth him. Four was the first to finish his drink.

"Yeah, that seems about right," Zeke said, taking the empty cup. "I'm going to get some more."

Four nodded, leaning over the rail watching the chasm. I stood next to him quietly as we mourn. I don't know how Dauntless could mourn through drinking excessively or act like a person's death is a party. In Dauntless, when a person dies their funeral is held immediately. Like die and move on. Back in Candor, if a person dies so suddenly there is an investigation, afterwards funeral planning, the waking, and finally a funeral. The truth of one's death comes first, the death honored and respected, and finally the obituary. Nearly everyone in Candor wanted to read the obituary to know their fellow member story.

"Mind if I have a word with Four?" somebody said from behind.

I turned around to see Head Dauntless Leader Max. Knowing I have no say to refuse a Dauntless leader, I patted Four's shoulder walking away. I walked at a good distance to give privacy, though close enough to hear.

"I know Amar took a particular interest in you. I think he saw strong potential." Max said.

"I didn't know him." Four said.

"He was always a little troubled, a little unbalanced. Not like the rest of the initiates in his class." Max said. "I think losing his grandparents really took a toll on him. Or maybe the problem was deeper . . . . I don't know. It could be that he's better off this way."

"Better off dead?" Four muttered.

"That's not exactly what I meant." Max corrected. "But here in Dauntless, we encourage our members to choose their own paths through life. If this what he chose . . . so much better." He put a hand on Four's shoulder. "Depending on how you do in your final examination tomorrow, you and I should talk about the future you'd like to have here in Dauntless. You're by far our most promising initiate, despite your background."

Max gave him one more pat before walking into the crowd. Zeke returned with the two cups and I join in on the group. All of us hardly said a word, as one of Amar's best friends stood on a chair shouting tales of Amar and how brave he was to explore the unknown. One by one, his friends talk till everyone lifted their glasses, chanting Amar's name. We raised our glasses and drank in his name.

But it doesn't feel right.

.o0o.

I went over to the salon to find Phoenix there. She was a hair stylist after all, though training in the fear simulation is her seasonal job. Seeing the fiery hair woman, stand over a tray sterilizing scissors. Her hands shaking breathing irregular.

"Phoenix," I spoke out.

"What!" she snapped turning around then stop. "Sorry."

"Are you alright?" I asked.

Phoenix took a deep breath, taking a seat on a duct-tape recliner. Her hands covered her face as she panted. Attempting to hold back her sobs, "Amar was my initiate. I knew him since his initiation. He wasn't suicidal. Even after his grandparents jump…he moved on. He was happy with his friends and told me anything if there was a problem. Hell, I know he is g—"

She stopped herself. "His secret, I should not expose it."

I walked over and took a seat next to her. Phoenix and Amar had a good coworker relationship and maybe even friends by the way they fought in combat. So casual like Dauntless siblings would do.

"I need something to do," Phoenix sighed. "Work on somebody's hair or something."

I paused wondering if there was a way I could help. Then remembering about my hair, I guess I could sacrifice this to help a mentor.

"I was thinking of dying my hair." I said.

A small smiled lifted her face. "Well, let's do it professionally."

So through the rest of the evening I let Phoenix do her work. I went through the wash, professional bleaching, dying, and styling for three hours. Yet Phoenix seemed much calmer as she did her work. Allowing her once Candor side comes out. In fact, I let my Candor side go was we gossip. Since the salon was empty I told Phoenix what I heard between Max and Four.

"Max has something plan for Four, but for what?" I asked.

"Don't worry about it. In Dauntless, the head leader goes to the top two initiates for the role of leadership." Phoenix assured.

"Oh, I thought it was something else." I confessed.

"Have you checked the score board?" Phoenix asked. As she started cutting my hair.

"No, not really…why?" I replied.

"You're in seventh place." Phoenix said. "Winning capture the flag and your defensive plan bumped you up. Now you need to accomplish your fear landscape and if you get the time right to impress the leaders you will get in the top five."

I sighed, tomorrow are the finals.

When Phoenix was done, she turned me around to face the mirror. My hair was officially dark purple with a few strands of blue and red while it reached my shoulders. The texture feeling much better now. Almost like my natural hair, yet different.

"Now, don't wash your hair for three days. You need to let the dyes set." Phoenix said.

"Okay, how much does this cost." I asked.

"Don't worry, it's on the house." Phoenix assured. "Now go back to your dorm and get some rest. You're gonna need it."

I nodded, getting up and leaving the salon through the back door. As I walk through the Pit, I see a couple of people around drinking alcohol while singing some sort of song. It sounded a bit folk, though much darker compare to the usual rock music blaring about.

"When God is gone and the Devil takes hold," The Dauntless woman sang. "Who will have mercy on your soul?"

I stood there listening to hypnotic music. Somehow the lyrics struck a nerve in me. Sending shivers down my spine. Realizing it was late I left the pit.

When I reached the dorm, everyone was asleep. Quietly, I open my trunk getting my toiletries before going to the bathroom to brush my teeth. Once done I looked at my reflection. I no longer looked like the girl from Candor anymore.

My face slightly bruised. Hair dyed a different color. Ink marking my skin and revealing clothing. Candor's council member daughter now a Dauntless girl. A defected implant in order to seek the truth? How far am I going to go before I get caught? Would I be kicked out of Dauntless and become factionless…or end up dead? Dead like Amar.

"O'Death," I quoted, hearing the song played at the pits.

Taking a deep breath, I went to the shower stall changing into my pajamas before going to bed.

'''''''''''''''''''''';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;'''''''''''''''''

Song used is O'Death by Jen Titus from Supernatural.

Thanks for reading and please leave a review!