I'm sorry for leaving off in such a bad place last time. I'm the devil.
Anyways.. here's chapter 14... the song used is 'Can't Let You Go' by Adam Lambert.
Let me know what you guys think? I need some support right now. This gosh darn story is getting hard to write for me. But I digress...
Enjoy the story!
When I Think About You
Chapter 14
The rest of rehearsal passed in a blur, and as soon as it was over I made a beeline for the door. My head was swimming and I just needed to be alone. I burst through the doors into the cool night air, but I was grabbed roughly by the shoulder and spun around to face a very concerned Monte.
"Dude, what the fuck is going on? You're not right today," He asked, his face a mask of pity.
"N… nothing, Monte. You heard Tommy. Nothing is going on." I screeched, wrenching out of Monte's grip and running off to the car.
The ride back to the hotel went by in the blink of an eye, and before I knew it I found myself collapsed on my bed, sobbing like a child.
I loved him.
Guess it was not meant to be…
I grabbed my journal (I took it everywhere with me) and started scribbling frantically in it.
But it's not as bad as it seems…
It only burns when I breathe. Yeah…
'I. Don't. Understand. I thought something was happening between me and Tommy.'
You saw the way that I fell
But I'm better off by myself.
That's the tale I like to tell…
'The whole time I've known him… I've sat here in silence, my feelings for him bottled up inside… I've listened to him complain about fucking girls, and I've never batted an eyelash at it.'
But it's not that easy for me to say goodbye.
Everything in me wants you back in my life.
Can't let you go.
Can't let you go.
In a fit of juvenile despair, I flop onto the bed and scream into the pillow as loud as I can. How could this be happening? I loved him. SO much. How could he DO this to me?
Feels like the dawn of the dead…
Like bombs going off in my head.
Never a moment of rest… yeah.
'I've tried so hard to be what he wants… I guess I shouldn't assume that he feels the same way I do.'
Nothing kills more than to know
That this is the end of the road.
And I know I've got to let go… ooohh
Pain ripped through my heart, and I yelped, my tears flowing anew.
But it's not that easy for me to say goodbye.
And everything in me wants you back in my life.
Can't let you go.
Can't let you go.
Can't let you go.
Can't let you go…
'I guess I was the one who jumped to conclusions. How could I ever believe that something so RIGHT could happen to ME? I've had my fair share of good luck. It's selfish of me to expect any more. I guess I just got carried away…' I paused, feeling the tears flow down my cheeks and onto the page. My heart was breaking. 'I should just forget about him.'
There was an ache in my chest that kept growing stronger.
Wish I could just find a way
To have all your memories erased
Cause constantly they're haunting me…
I rolled over in the bed, my face looking swollen and red in the dim light. Soon, the sandman came and pulled me into a restless sleep.
But it's not that easy for me to say goodbye…
Everything in me wants you back in my life….
I dreamed of my baby.
Can't let you go.