Fear of Fire

Disclaimer - Don't own YYH.

Chapter 14 - Concealed

XxXxX

Botan opened her eyes and looked around in the darkness. It felt really odd sleeping in a castle. Yet, with the way things were in Makai, one would think that there would be a lot of noise. Instead, it was eerily quiet. She got up and looked out the window. By the position of the moon, she had only slept for a few hours.

I don't know why I'm so restless. I wonder if Hiei is having trouble sleeping, too...

The more she thought of it, the more she doubted it. Hiei was comfortable all the way to the castle. There was no way he was nervous about anything.

And then there's the ceremony tomorrow evening. How long does Hiei plan on staying? Will we leave after this is finished?

There was one other thing bothering her, too. What if the others alerted Koenma to their absense? What if they marched in and demanded a fight? After five minutes of imagining what would happen if Yuusuke and the others arrived, she was ready to pull her hair out with frustration.

"They wouldn't..." She tried to tell herself in a small whisper. "They wouldn't dare..." Then a small voice gave her a bit of hope.

Kurama isn't so stupid! Maybe he would tell the others that we would be fine because of Hiei. He knows his friend's strength better than anyone. But what if he doesn't tell them?

By the time those thoughts were finished, she felt sick to her stomach. There was no way she would be able to sleep with those kinds of things floating around inside her head.

I only hope Hiei is having better luck sleeping...

XxXxX

Her hopes didn't do much good to the koorime. He was wide awake. Wide awake! Only, his thoughts were different. His mind was on the ceremony. It was sort of important to him, even though he had known about it most of his life. Still, this was the first one he would ever attend. And this time...he had Botan with him.

If only this weren't so confusing. These emotions...I can hardly understand them on my own. I've never felt like this about someone before...

His crimson eyes narrowed at the ceiling. The thought of actually taking a step forward towards his future instead of a step backwards seemed insane. Would he ever really be ready for change? He hated change. Except the changes that had to do with his friends. He was actually glad that he got to meet all of them. And to think, his first friend was still his best friend. He was really proud of that. Kurama had done a lot for him and he often felt as though he didn't do enough to deserve it. But he knew he was wrong. Kurama wasn't petty. He didn't need a reason to help anyone. He did it without question.

Since when have I gotten so soft? All of these thoughts, the things I'm saying... It's almost like I'm not myself anymore. Since when have I shared my past, my feelings with anyone other than myself? If I grow closer to her...I may lose who I really am...

He got up and went outside, onto the balcony. His father had found him when he had run away from the others, from her. At first, he had been beyond furious at Eien. The fire demon had left him alone, left him to suffer, and had made him believe that he had no one. Scratch that, he did have no one. His father, however sorry he had seemed, had to be up to something. The ceremony in the years past had not been complete without his presence.

My father is still concerned about his subjects and he places them above me. What was he trying to say to me before? How could I let this happen? How stupid have I become?

He had led Botan here out of hopes of gaining his father's approval and also to try and forgive him for the past. He still had no idea why his father had sought him out in the first place. Eien had said very little to him other than to calm him down. Mostly, he had apologized for what he had done in Hiei's childhood. He had said that had he helped Hiei, they both would have been in danger.

Still, why wait until now? Why...

The koorime's crimson eyes went wide. He had to get out of his father's territory before the end of the ceremony, which was in only two days. However, he couldn't just leave. Another barrier had been erected. He had to figure out how to take it down or else he and Botan were in serious trouble.

XxXxX

Botan groaned, rolling over to avoid the annoying ray of sunshine that was glaring in from the window. Her mind was so foggy that for a few minutes, she forgot where she was. She sat up a moment later and looked around. Just as she was about to stand up and get undressed, her door swung open.

"Onna, get dressed. Quickly. We have too many things to do today to be lazy." Hiei glared at her as he slammed her door shut. She flushed and looked away, unable to meet his glare. "Did you not hear me? Get up!" No matter how angry he sounded, she could catch a note of desperation that she didn't want to hear.

"Well, how can I with you in here?" She asked, turning her gaze back to meet his. "Why don't you wait outside?" He heaved a sigh of such frustration that she knew something had to be wrong.

"Go in there and dress, onna. And hurry or else I'll make you go out there in those." Hiei made a gesture toward the yukata that they had provided for her. It wasn't very heavy, for it was summer in Makai and the warmth often kept even demons up at night. Botan crossed her arms and gave him a look of indignation.

"Fine." She huffed, grabbing a folded kimono off of the chair next to the table. Five minutes later, she emerged from the small bathroom, glaring at him. "Now what is so important? This ceremony doesn't start until mid-afternoon." He grabbed her wrist and dragged her out, just barely giving her time to slip her feet into the zori by the door. "Hiei-"

"Be quiet, understand?" She stared at the back of his head for a moment before stopping, pulling her wrist from his hand. He looked back at her with such an angry gaze. She felt compelled to understand why he was acting so different.

"What has gotten into you, Hiei? Just yesterday you-" The glare that suddenly appeared in his eyes made her stop mid-sentence. She could hear his breathing and knew that he was trying to control the burst of anger that was swirling within him. "You can tell me... I'm just..." She was afraid to tell him of her concern. It seemed that whenever that happened, he flipped out on her. "What did I do to make you so upset with me?"

"You did nothing, onna. Now come on." He grabbed her wrist again, this time making sure she couldn't escape it. She noticed that he wasn't using her name but once again calling her 'onna.' She wondered briefly if he would resort back to calling her 'baka ferry onna.'

I never would have come if I knew that this would happen...

His behavior was making her scared and worried that she wouldn't be able to talk to him like she had before. She wondered if it was all for nothing. Maybe she should have let him stay in Makai. Maybe none of this would have happened and she wouldn't have had to endure his coldness toward her again. She would rather they be apart than be enemies. When he stopped, she noticed that they were outside, near the barriers. Except...something was different.

"What is this? What's going on?" She reached out to touch the barrier and felt such a painful electric jolt that she let out a startled cry. "Hiei, what's happening?" He stared at the new barrier, certain that there was a way to break through it.

"What kind of barrier would this be classified as in Reikai?" His question made her look back at it. It was visible and could be sensed. She found nothing really unusual about it other than the fact of its strength.

"It has to be a normal force field. One that is visible to the eye and can be sensed the moment of its creation. However, it's far too strong to be just a normal barrier. Perhaps it is one that will fall after a certain event, like the ceremony tonight. Your father probably doesn't want any more guests." She looked back at him. "Why are you worried about this barrier?"

"Because...something isn't right." He answered indifferently. She figured that he knew more than he was letting on. "Is there any way to take it down?" His only answer was a shrug. "You should know, you were trained for this, right?"

"Yes, I was." She stated, crossing her arms. "Usually, the creator would have to take it down but it depends on how strong the ones within the barrier are. This type of force field should never be set up to imprison someone." He seemed almost relieved at her answer. "There's something you're not telling me. Are we in danger? Is that why you're on edge? Tell me something!" He stood there watching her for a moment.

"We can't talk here, onna. Let's just go get ready for later." He felt her frustration pretty clearly, since it was a shared emotion. He needed a plan of escape. Even though they were outside and not trying to leave, even though they were on their way back to their rooms, they were being watched. There was no way Eien was setting them free unless it was through death.

XxXxX

"What have you got planned, Hiei?" Eien muttered to the silence of his room. He would not allow his son to leave. The koorime would have to be a part of the ceremony. His part in it included taking the life of the sacrifice. Only recently had he begun to use real beings. Normally, a sacrifice would not be made and they would only spill a little of the blood of one of the eager youths. However, now that he had a chance to become truly powerful and escape his true hell, Eien was going to take the full opportunity.

I want to truly be able to leave this place. I can only send forth a copy of my true self, a doppleganger. That Reikai barrier will fall once Hiei sacrifices his onna. The beauty of it will be my release, as well as the Forbidden Child's eternal suffering.

He had his doubts at first that Hiei would not be able to do the task. However, he had a second plan already in motion. Only the girl would be able to ruin his plans and he had faith that she wouldn't be able to. Sure, she was pretty smart but it seemed that she lacked common sense.

I wonder...how will this turn out? Already I have a pretty good idea.

XxXxX

Botan stood before the mirror, brushing her hair and getting ready for whatever situation fate was about to toss them into. She hoped that Hiei had only been on edge because of the upcoming events. After all, there had to be a reason for his anger. He didn't usually get mad over nothing. Something was making the koorime nervous. She only hoped that he had stage fright...or something of the sort. A knock on her door made her nearly fall off of her chair. Then, Eien entered with a light smile on his face.

"All ready for tonight?" He asked in his usual soft tone. She flushed and nodded. "Good. I decided to come and see if you would like for me to escort you." She opened her mouth to question him about Hiei when he chuckled. "He had to be there early. Come, let us go before they start without us." A shy smile graced the ferry girl's lips.

"As if they would actually think of starting without their lord." He raised a brow before nodding at her statement.

"Clever girl, aren't you? I can see why my son is so taken with you." He stated smoothly. Botan looked away to hide her embarrassment. Why was Eien being so charming, so soft-spoken? She didn't really know his true nature but she couldn't imagine that a man with his reputation really enjoyed being so cordial. "You know, he did risk a lot, bringing you here. He told me that you could hold your own, at least until someone could save you. He was correct, if I remember our first meeting correctly. You have such determination and such loyalty to him." She slid on her zori, as sort of a distraction for herself. Then, with a tight feeling in her stomach, she met the man's gaze.

"Pardon me, Eien-san, but why are you acting this way?" She asked softly. He frowned slightly. "I am not...suspicious of your actions but when a man of your calibur and status talks in such a way to...a woman, what else could she think?" Her face was burning from her embarrassment. He chuckled.

"You've nothing to fear. I only mean to flatter you and gain your friendship. After all, with the way my son thinks of you..." He trailed off, leaving her wondering just what he had been about to say about Hiei. "Now, enough dawdling. I realize that you are right. I am acting strange. It is merely because of this ceremony. I could never repay you nor Hiei nearly enough for making it complete. We don't want to be late." She felt as though his statement was ominous. She didn't like the way it made her stomach churn. But if it made him and Hiei happy, how could she possibly refuse to be part of a historical tradition and be a guest of the only complete one in what must have been over a century?

XxXxX

Hiei disliked having her out of his sight. What he disliked even more was having to be at the hall earlier than she did. Since his father was plotting, the koorime wanted to know where she was and what she was doing at all times.

"Hiei!" To hear her voice after thinking only negative thoughts through the entire past few hours... He couldn't even describe how it made him feel. When he turned to greet her, he saw her in the company of his father. It made his gaze darken. How would he know, without searching her mind with his Jagan, what kind of poison Eien had spouted? She looked happy and relieved to see him but her smile faded at his expression. "Are you all right?" He simply nodded, grabbing her arm and pulling her to his side.

"Are you?" He whispered, long after Eien went seeking someone else's company. Botan met his gaze with concern etched on every part of her face. She nodded, her solemn expression giving him a sudden insight. So, Eien had said something. He wanted to know what it was. Unfortunately, the beginning of the ceremony started so they had to sit through hours of speeches about the importance of the purity of the castle and the race of the fire demons, which made Hiei feel like a bastard child. He wasn't fully fire demon, so why didn't they care if he was there? There were even a few welcoming speeches for him, making him feel sick to his stomach. Then they ate. Hiei hadn't recovered from his bout of nausea so he only picked at the food. Botan seemed to take notice and tried in small, unnoticable ways to offer him comfort.

Surviving dinner had been hard; surviving idle conversation with people he had never even met was even harder. But Hiei felt as though he had an obligation to them. They trusted his father and they were loyal to him, speaking of him only with admiration and respect. It seemed that since Hiei was Eien's son, they expected the same of him. Trying to be civil to them was making him want to slit his own throat. Almost every word that left his mouth in conversation was a lie.

"Hiei, I'm going to back to my room. I don't feel well and I'm tired." Botan had been the only reason he still possessed his sanity. If she was leaving...he was going with her. He nodded and grabbed her hand, pulling her aside to speak with her alone.

"Wait up for me. I won't be very much longer. I want to talk to my father so that I can leave early." She noticed how tired he looked, how much everything was weighing him down.

"All right. Just...don't be too late." She left him standing there, in the shadows. His crimson eyes followed her until he could no longer see her. He was getting such a headache. All he wanted was peace...quiet...and to get the hell out of the castle. But he had to come up with something soon. He didn't have too much time alone so his only other option was to ignore those that spoke to him and to focus on plotting to achieve his goal. After a brief few words to his father, Hiei excused himself from the so-called celebration. Purity wasn't something he celebrated or even cared about. Hell, he was so far from pure that he was surprised that he knew the meaning of the word. However, his sister was so pure that he wasn't sure that she knew what impure was, even though she had witnessed it firsthand. After a few minutes, he made it to her room and entered without even knocking. She was sitting on the bed, not even changed from the kimono yet. He wasn't surprised. The one she was wearing was different than the one she had on that afternoon. The current kimono had a different obi and she would probably need help undoing it.

"I suppose I'm not too late." His words were soft and made her turn her head to gaze at him. He knew how angry and upset she had been over his attitude that afternoon. However, after figuring out that his father was plotting against him, he had no other reaction but to withdraw into his coldness.

"No, you're not. I only just found my way back." She spoke in a toneless voice that made him want to cringe. Her support had been given and received willingly but now she was withdrawing, as he had done earlier. "Eien-san said some very interesting things to me earlier. I know that you were curious." She had his attention and both of them knew it. "He said that you were taken with me. He spoke to me with flattery and kindness. I want to know what is suddenly going on. Tell me what's wrong, Hiei." Her demand was impossible. There was no way he could tell her without scaring her. That would undoubtedly cause problems. Therefore, he had to make up a believable reason as to what had freaked him out that afternoon.

"Eien...did not tell me of the barrier and...I felt trapped. This ceremony has me anxious, on...Botan." He had been about to call her onna again. Though he knew how much she disliked it, he had always called her by that. "You hardly seemed yourself today, either." Botan crossed her arms.

"I hardly think I should be required to be myself. This place is swarming with demons and I do not want to be attacked again, sorrry to say." He glared at her for her boldness to snap at him in such a way. "And I'd be stupid if I didn't recognize a lie when I heard one." She stood up and walked over to him. "You've been having the weirdest mood swings whenever you're in my company. I feel like...I'm the cause of your anger and your...pain." She grabbed the front of his shirt, her eyes surprisingly clear. "Tell me..." His hands came up to remove hers from his clothing and also to remove her from his personal space. She stiffened and pulled out of his grasp, turning around to stare out the window at the rather fascinating darkness. "Get out." The order was so softly spoken that had he had normal hearing, she would've had to repeat herself.

"Why do you suddenly get to demand so much from me? You act so timid for so long, as though I might just take off without a word and now you have the nerve to order me to leave?" He was getting angry quite fast. The both of them had been at odds all day. How hadn't they seen it coming? "You know how I am. I never talk of my feelings toward anything and yet-"

"Must I say it again?" Her voice was low and kept so on purpose. Hiei suddenly felt the wave of emotions coming from her small, petite form. "Leave me alone." He sighed. What the hell was keeping him there? It certainly wasn't defiance. If anything, her orders were empty and she didn't mean them. Was it...her pain that kept him there? Or the knowledge that it was his fault she was hurting?

What are these feelings of hers? So vivid...so lovely...

There were other emotions besides her pain that he could feel strongly. They weren't anger or pain. They weren't anything he'd ever encountered before. She wouldn't look at him for fear that he would see how she felt, how much he hurt her when he lied to her. Yet, she couldn't be angry with him. If Hiei had to lie, he had a good reason. Something must have made him insecure. Something hurt him, made him retreat back into the confines of his mind.

Why can't I tell him how much... Why can't I tell him what I've realized? Why am I such a coward?

She suddenly let out a gasp when she felt his arms around her waist, pulling her back into his warm embrace. She found that she lost her voice at the intimacy the position suggested. He said something, whispered it in her ear in a tone of voice that was unrecognizable. She thought he told her to trust him. But what he did next made her forget the fact that he had said anything at all. She felt his lips against her throat, right at the point where he could feel her pulse. He turned her around, staring at her with an intense look in his crimson eyes.

"H-Hiei..." Her soft voice nearly made him lose his nerve, until he felt her emotions. He leaned down, capturing her lips with his own. He was expressing emotions he didn't know he had. It felt so strange to him. It made him feel vulnerable, weak. She suddenly realized that he was no longer near her when she stumbled forward and dropped to her knees. "Hiei..." She called, noticing the way he was staring at her. It had been his first experience with a deep emotion. He was trembling so much that she could see it.

"Good night." He whispered, turning and leaving quickly, closing the door quietly behind him.

XxXxX

Well...I tried not to make him too OOC. Let me know how I did... I planned on ending the chapter before they went to her room but I figured that it needed to be a little longer for you.

Please review and let me know how I did! And, speaking of reviews, thank you all so much for being so patient. I've been using my brother's computer lately and I decided not to let an opportunity to write pass me by. But soon, I'll have my own computer! Yay!