14

Jane was trapped. She was caught in an evil place and she couldn't escape, couldn't call out. She tried to scream, tried to run, but could make no sound, no movement.

Johnny woke up to her whimpering beside him, and reached over to wake her, but she recoiled and yelled when he touched her softly. "Jane, Jane, wake up, you're having a nightmare!" Jane was disoriented and then started sobbing. He asked her to tell him about it, but she couldn't remember anything, just sobbed in his arms.

John turned to Roy as they came back from a run. "Roy, do you know anything about dreams?"

"Dreams? Like interpretations or something?"

"No, like nightmares, recurring ones."

"Are you having bad dreams, Johnny? Something on your conscience?"

"No, it's nothing to do with me. And what do you mean, do I have something on my conscience? My conscience is fine, thank you very much."

Roy chuckled. "Sorry, Johnny, I couldn't resist. So who's having recurring nightmares? Rose?"

"No, actually, it's Jane. It's been happening more and more frequently, too."

"What kind of nightmares?"

"That's just it; she doesn't remember anything when she wakes up. She just freaks out and has a hard time coming out of it."

"I really don't know anything about that kind of nightmare, Johnny. Perhaps you should ask Brackett or somebody."

"Yeah, maybe. I'll think about it."

Jane was sleeping badly a lot of the time now, and she was startling at noises. Sometimes when Rose cried, it was as if a knife was going through her head and she would stand there, looking at her and crying too, unable to move.

After Johnny talked to Brackett, Dr Early went over to the chapel annex where Jane had her desk to speak with her.

"What's going on, Jane? Your husband is concerned that you're not sleeping well and having a lot of bad dreams."

Jane sighed. "I am, but I can never remember them. I don't like what's happening to me, either, but I don't know what it is or how to stop it."

"When did the dreams start? Can you remember that?"

"I think it was a few nights after I did that intervention with the little girl who cut herself."

"Sarah?"

"Yes. I remember thinking about her, and wondering what was going to happen with her…" she stopped talking and looked off into space.

"And? Jane?... Jane!"

She took a deep breath and looked at Dr Joe. "I'm sorry; I forgot what I was saying."

"Hmm. Well, I think we should talk some more, but I have somewhere else I need to be right now. I'd like you to come in with Johnny in the next few days. Start keeping a journal of when you have those dreams and anything that you can remember about them, even if it's just what you were feeling at the time. Can you do that?"

"Of course, Dr Joe. No problem."

Jane put a journal beside their bed, with a pen and a flashlight. Johnny looked at them skeptically. "If you can't remember, how's this supposed to help?"

"Dr Joe asked me to write down my feelings, sensations, and things like that. It's like being a detective. We're looking for clues." Abruptly she turned to Johnny and held him close.

"What's this?" he asked.

"I don't know, but suddenly I'm scared."

"There's nothing to be afraid of. I'm right here." She buried her face in his shoulder. They both remembered what happened more than two years previously, when they thought they had lost each other.

'If you can't remember…' for some reason these words went round and round in Jane's head as she was trying to fall asleep. There must be some reason I can't remember…maybe I don't want to remember…maybe there's a good reason…

She was stuck, in a dark place, something hurt, she was afraid, Sarah was there, the little girl from the hospital….No, no, no she whimpered, it couldn't be true, it couldn't be…

She woke up and looked at the clock beside the bed. It was four am. Despite the hour and the way she was feeling, she got out of bed and went into the living room with her journal and her pen. Her heart was racing. "Fine. That's a sensation. I'll write it down." She remembered that somehow Sarah was in her dream. She wrote that down. She calmed her breathing and checked her body for other sensations. Sick. I feel sick to my stomach, she thought. She checked again. Fear. Of what? No, no, no. Not going there. What else? She felt so tired, so very tired…

Johnny found her curled up asleep on the floor of the living room with her journal on the table when he got up to get ready for work. He picked it up and read: "Heart racing, Sarah, sick, Fear, Tired…" Oh, Jane, he thought. What on earth is going on with you?

Jane wasn't going to be needed to give testimony in court about Sarah – after the girl had spoken with Jane, she was able to talk with the investigating police officer and the information she gave then, with the tape recording, was enough for them to charge the man Sarah called 'Uncle Ted'. Sarah's tape would be played instead of her having to say it all again, and the police officer's testimony would be sufficient, said the prosecutor. Jane and Dixie were relieved, both for themselves and for little Sarah.