Only you can prevent forest fires!

Disclaimer: konfizkate91 does not own Beyblade.

Kai is screaming at a heap of material on the ground. He is surrounded by trees, bushes, and dirt. A lake is seen behind some trees.

Kai screams "Stupid mother-fucking tent! Why do you hate me?! Aahhh! (starts jumping up and down on it while screaming) Everything I attempt fails!"

Ray asks calmly "Still trying to put up the tent?"

"YES! It's fucking annoying! Like Tyson!"

Tyson passes by "Kai, will you stop yelling? You sound like a kangaroo who's dying and in heat at the same time. It's really disturbing."

" I will not be silenced!" Kai keeps jumping.

Kenny says "I kinda liked him better when he never spoke a word to us and was serious."

Max adds "And when he didn't punch me everyday. I nearly choked on my cereal this morning becuz of him. He bitch slapped my face."

Kai points at Max "Don't blame me when you're the one who can't chew properly. I'm Kai. The Bladebreakers are camping, today. And tonight. And tomorrow!"

Hilary says "Great, these two days will be great. They're filming! I should break that camera."

Ray to camera "I'm Ray, and ready to hurt Hilary if she doesn't shut up! (to Kai jumping and screaming) In case you haven't noticed, Kai, that's not helping."

Kai stops jumping "Oh."

Hilary is shocked "What do you mean 'oh'? You really thought going crazy over it would make it stay up?"

Kai asks "Are you going to bitch me these next two days? Cuz I get enough of that at Tyson's place."

" If you act stupid, yes." she answers.

" Well you just ruined my two days of being in the middle of nowhere. Before I argue more- (to camera) KaiRayRayKai Production #35. (to Hilary) Please, go on in your quest of making my life miserable. Proceed with fulfilling your day."

" Shut the fuck up." she goes away.

Ray celebrates "Yay! She left! Want help with that?"

Kai pouts "No, I want you to do it for me."

" Maybe if you had poles, it wouldn't fall."

" Are you serious? It needs poles? What kind of shit tent is this?"

" They all need poles, asshole. Where are yours?"

" I dunno, Ray. Keeping track of poles isn t my thing. Breaking them is."

" You broke them?"

" I tried."

" They're made of metal, fuckface."

" That's why I said 'I tried' and not 'I did', smartass."

" So where are they, now?"

Kai gives a childish smile "I threw them in the lake."

"You really expected to build a tent with out poles?"

" I didn't think they were necessary."

" Go get them."

" Fuck. But I threw them far. In the middle." Kai points.

" I really don't give a shit! You want a tent to sleep in, tonight?!"

" ....not really."

After finding and retrieving the poles...

Kai complains "That water is disgusting."

Ray gives his opinion "It looks clean. Not perfect, but clean."

" But it tastes nasty." Kai spits.

" You're not supposed to drink the lake water!"

" Forget that, make my tent." Kai orders.

" You make it. You're a big boy, I'm assuming."

" Physically, not mentally."

Ray thinks for a moment "Huh?"

" I have the mental capacity of a newborn."

" Okay, now you're insulting babies?"

" Oh, that was low. Like below the belt, low."

" Just build your tent."

20 min. later...

Ray says in an annoyed voice "Kai, stop crying. I'm serious, now. Get up."

Max comes by "Why is the retard crying? No more war paint?"

" Cuz he's stupid. He's frustrated cuz he can't build a tent."

" And you were assuming he could? I can't tell which of you is stupider."

Kai growls "You're going down."

Max asks "Me or the tent?"

" Both of you. You first!" Kai starts jumping on tent material and screaming again "Aaahhhhh!"

Hilary comes in "Will you stop it, asshole!? I've been watching you, and –"

Kai looks at her "Why would you watch me? Am I that interesting?"

" Not interesting, but stupid! You don't build a tent throwing the material over yourself and flailing your arms around until you trip over your own feet and fall!"

Kai crosses his arms "You have your ways and I have mine! So leave me alone, whore. Go work another corner."

Tyson says " 'Kay, we're done."

Kai freaks out "Done what? What's going on? Oh shit, the sky is falling, isn t it? I hope you're happy, Hilary."

Hilary answers "Actually, I am. I distracted you long enough for Max and Tyson to build the tent for you. Now I don't have to see you act like the incompetent idiot you are."

" I was talking to you for less than 20 seconds. They couldn't-" he turns to see his tent up"...oh wow. It's beautiful."

" Now, please, put some pants on." begs Hilary.

Ray focuses the camera on everything below Kai's waist. He has boxers on, but no pants. He brings all of Kai's body into the picture again.

Kai says "I'm going swimming in the lake. I don't need any! (jumps into lake) Nobody drinks this water!"

Max says dryly "Oh yeah, cuz it looks really appealing. I'm gonna drink it all."

Later on...

Tyson complains "Can we make a fire, now? I'm hungry."

Kenny retorts "What a surprise. You're hungry."

" What's to eat?" asks Max.

Kenny answers "We have the stuff for s'mores, hot dogs, and the fish Kai was punching out becuz he thought it bit him. He says it's edible."

Max wonders "He kept it? What an idiot. Ray, get the camera out of my face, please. Where's Kai, by the way?"

Ray informs "He's making a fire."

Tyson looks around "I don't see him."

Ray says casually " He's doing it in his tent."

Hilary hears this "You're kidding. You have to be. Right? Right?!"

Kai screams "DRANZER! FLAME SABER!" from inside his tent.

Hilary is appalled "I don't believe it! He's actually doing it. Asshole!"

She goes into his tent and picks up his blade before it can attack the pile of sticks in the middle. Ray comes in behind her.

Hilary screams "Are you insane?!"

Kai wonders "No. Are you?"

" NO! I'm not the one starting a fire in my tent!"

" I know. I am." Kai stays calm all the while.

"Your tent could've caught fire and then where would you sleep?"

"In your tent."

"I don't think so. I wouldn't share my tent with someone who is in need of a asylum as much as you do."

"Who said anything about sharing? I'd kick you out. Like a gentleman."

" Why do I bother talking to you?"

" I wonder that everyday. 'Why does she talk to me? I'm not really listening, yet she continues. She's really annoying. Our conversations are never pleasant, but she talks to me anyway. Do these pants make my ass look big?' "

Hilary's mouth opens and eyes widen ".....I'm leaving you, now." she leaves, but Ray stays.

Tyson comes to Hilary "What did he tell you? I couldn't hear him."

" I just got royally burned by an anti-social loner. I wanna be alone." goes into her tent.

In Kai's tent...

Ray says "You are so mean to her."

Kai responds "She asked for it. She still has my Dranzer."

"You can get it back and apologize at the same time."

" No. I'm hungry."

They go outside and see that they're struggling to start a fire.

Kenny says "Kai, you were making a fire with Dranzer before. Maybe you could-"

" That slut took it from me. She still has it."

Kenny suggests "Apologize and get it back."

" I'm convinced you and Ray were separated at birth. I'm not saying sorry. Have a lighter. Have three lighters. Hell, have seven lighters." Kai throws 7 lighters.

" Why do you have so many lighters?" Max asks Kai.

" In case I lose one. Or five."

Later that night, during story-telling...

Tyson goes "Then, when I opened the fridge, I found...A THREE-MONTH-OLD TUNA CASSEROLE! Smelling like death."

Kai screams "Aaahhhhh!" he runs into his tent "MOMMY!"

" Okay, I get it. It wasn't scary. Or funny. Ease up on the sarcasm."

Kai comes back "Pass me another marshmallow, Maxy, please."

" No." Max says.

Kai stands up immediately "What did you say?"

" I said no. You make them all sticky, then throw it in my hair. Or in my face."

" Don't tell me what I do. I know what I do. Now, give me a FUCKING MARSHMALLOW! I can't believe they're actually called 'Fucking Marshmallows.'"

Tyson corrects him "They're called funky marshmallows, Kai. Have a whole bag."

Kai puts one over the fire until it's almost brown. He takes it and smothers it all over Max's face.

" That burns, retard! Ow! Have you lost it? Did you ever have it?!" Kai punches him "How mature."

Hilary says "I'm going to sleep. Night."

Everyone "Night."

" I'm going, too." agrees Kenny.

Tyson & Max get up "Same here."

Ray says "I'll stay up a bit."

Kai takes another marshmallow "Yeah."

When they leave...

Ray says "You're planning something evil."

Kai keeps looking at his marshmallow over the fire "I know."

" What is it?"

" I'm debating over stealing all their clothes, and I mean ALL, including what they're wearing now, and hiding them somewhere deep in the forest, or throwing them in the water when they're fast asleep." Kai's treat catches fire and he steps on it.

" Why not both? Rape them, hide their clothes, and throw them in the water nearly naked."

" I'm not raping them, moron. I'm...WE're...removing their clothes. There's no sexual contact involved."

" Whatever. Or, we remove their clothes and fit two in a sleeping bag. We're gonna end up with a gay pair, but whatever. It's all good!"

" I'm not touching Hilary. You could do it." Kai forewarns.

" Like Hell! We'll both do it."

" Tyson and Max together. It's a must. Good thing they sleep like fucking babies."

" I'm gonna feel so gay, removing a guy's clothes."

" I'll do it, you big baby. Get my and your sleeping bag ready."

While Ray gets the sleeping bags, Kai starts taking off the others' clothes.

5 min. later...

Kai says again "I'm not touching her, you do it."

Ray argues again "I'm not touching her, you do it."

" I'm not...screw this. Just do it. I did the others."

" We'll just leave her be."

" Fine. Hold on, find my blade."

" I found something else. Like a journal. Holy crap, she's rambling on about Max, here."

" Let me see! Crap, that's gross. She's talking about you on this page. She says you're really sexy."

" No fucking way. (takes book) That's really wrong. She's talking about you, too! She likes us all."

" I'm so keeping this. I could blackmail her with it if I happen to be in that situation." Kai takes it.

" I found your blade."

" Don't worry, Dranzer, the slut won't harass you, anymore."

They proceed with putting two people in a bag. But then...

Ray gets an idea "I got another idea. We'll put the bags in a canoe and make it float in the lake."

" Brilliant. And then we'll watch as they have a fucking heart attack."

They let the canoes float in the water and go to sleep. The camera stops and starts again with a freaking out Kai in the picture. It's 8 am.

Ray is heard yawning "What's your problem?"

" The fucking canoes are gone. I have no idea where they are."

Ray zooms in and out on the lake.

" Well, no wonder, they drifted away. You expected them to stay in place?"

" Maybe. I am in such shit, it's not even funny."

At 3 p.m....

Hilary's voice "KAAAAAAAAAAII!!!"

" No fucking way." Kai starts laughing.

Max wonders "What's so funny?"

Ray is in awe. "How'd you get back? Where'd you end up?"

Tyson explains "When we woke up, some bears were smelling us. Hilary screamed, of course, and the bears tore the bags apart, which we couldn't do. Then they started chasing us."

Kenny continues "We started running and a forest ranger got us away from the bears and drove us back here. Why the hell is he still laughing!?"

Ray guesses "He was freaking out before, so seeing you must be a relief to him."

" I'm laughing cuz they actually got back!" he manages to say.

Max demands "Where are our clothes?"

Ray says "In my tent."

Tyson asks "Was anyone else oddly turned on by that experience?"

Max gets pissy "You were turned on by that?! You disgusting prick!"

Kai realizes "It's a brand new day! Time to punch Maxy." starts chasing Max.

Hilary's exhausted "I'm going to sleep in my tent, and hopefully, when I wake up, things will run normally." she leaves.

Ray to camera "Well, strangely enough they're back in one piece. I'm Ray." he turns to Kai, who's punching out Max "Kai, he's unconscious. We have a rule. No punching anyone when they're knocked out, remember?"

Kai looks up at him "Shut up. He's awake. (fakes Max's voice) I'm Max and I want Kai to punch me. SUGAR!"

" No Kai."

" Fine. I'm Kai. And I m gonna throw Max in the water, like so." Kai drags Max into the water "If he drowns, it's not my fault. Now, I'm gonna eat, cuz I'm starving. Good-bye. That raccoon looks tasty. Let's eat it!" He starts chasing the raccoon into the forest, but finds something better "Hey, look, a bear. It looks tasty. Let's eat it!"

" Kai, no!" Ray runs.

Camera stops before Ray could stop Kai from trying to kill a bear.

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Reisgurl: If you check ur review for chap.13, u'll see that u only gave me part of your email! What site do I email u at? (ex. hotmail, yahoo, etc.)