Magnificent 7 is not mine. I just like playing in the sandbox from time to time.
It was after visiting hours in the local hospital. JD couldn't sleep, and was bored out of his mind; the television had nothing interesting playing, and the magazines and other stuff had been confiscated, shortly after Chris and the others had been kicked out by the nurses, insisting that the wounded patient needed peace and quite, so he could sleep.
A soft nock came from the open doorway. John Daniel Dunne looked towards the door, grateful for the interruption. "Ezra!" JD motioned the slender, green-eyed man in and towards the empty foldaway chair.
"Mister Dunne!" Ezra allowed JD to see hints of a smile on his face. He needn't have bothered, as the entire team recognized the relief in the ex-FBI agent's eyes when the doctors and nurses finally allowed the youngest member visitors. "Since you have proven incapable of occupying yourself with plans to successfully escape meddlesome confinement, I found it necessary to bring something that might prove of valuable during your incarceration."
JD Dunne started to laugh, cut it out when his ribs protested. "Don't make me laugh Ezra. Just cause you and Vin can't stand being patients in hospitals, does not mean the rest of us are any more eager to give Nathan or Chris to mother us to death."
Ezra held out the hand wrapped present. " Why do you think I endeavor to never admit when I might be feeling 'under the weather'? Mister Jackson's obvious concern for our health and wellbeing is a mite overbearing, but it is Mister Larabee's subsequent orders and enforcement for injured parties to 'take it easy' until the injury is healed are, at times, unwelcome."
JD rolled his eyes as he tore the wrapper. "Yeah, well if you and certain others would not wait until you are at death's door before admitting help is appreciated, then Chris would not go overboard when you and certain others cannot take care of themselves as we are accustomed."
"You do realize that your statement refers to everyone on the team – including yourself."
"It's just a bullet graze! I didn't need to visit the emergency room to get it fixed up. Nathan takes care of skin-deep injuries all the time."
Ezra raised an eyebrow. "And yet, your ribs are tender, indicating a deeper injury, as evidenced by your request for no comedy entertainment."
JD blinked. Looked at the book in his hand. Stared at it to ensure he was seeing the object correctly. "A dictionary? Paperback even?" His tone wasn't confronting or angry, mostly curious.
Ezra sank into the foldaway chair. "It seemed most appropriate to get one that can be easily replaced, and not one that will sit in the corner of the desk, gathering dust. This way," Ezra Standish pointed to the handheld/travel sized book, "it won't set anyone back to replace it, or get their own copy."
JD snickered, looked up. "I can't believe you bought a paperback. I thought the only books you bought – even to just give away – had to be hardcover. Preferably leather-bound or similar, one that doesn't show wear-and-tear if someone looks at it wrong."
"Why does everyone believe that my showroom library contains all the books I own, and that I would never lower myself to touch a literary writing produced for the masses?" Ezra sighed. "Truly, I do enjoy reading modern novels, mystery, western, and have indulged in a few Science-Fiction, Fantasy, and other genres offered to the discerning reader."
"Tell me the truth, Ezra. Have you ever touched a 'Idiots Guide to' or other self-help books?"
Standish exaggerated the shudder. "Those pedestrian-style writings? I should say not!"
"Not even if they were leather-bound?"
Ezra's face glowered at the though. "Not willingly."
"You think Chris would appreciate receiving a set of the 'Dummies Help to' series?
"Mister Dunne! The 'Idiots Guide' and "Dummies Help' do not come in a set! They are also produced in paperback form only. No one would be willing to buy them or use than as an encyclopedia reference. They are written as self-help on one particular aspect of life, technology, or similar."
"Yeah, but can you imagine Chris's face when he receives a set dedicated to 'self Diagnosis of injuries'? Or Nathan's on 'how to treat minor wounds'?"
Both men fell silent. "The idea has merit" Ezra finally admitted. "You have a devious mind, young Dunne. Why do you not express yourself at work more often?"
JD smirked. "I do. Thanks to you and Vin, I've learned the consequences of being caught. Besides, why unleash it against family? Target others who won't prank back."
Ezra laughed, with his fully belly, and not the quiet chuckles he usually indulged in. "What's the point in bullying the other teams? By confining our idle hands to M7, Chris can reign us in before the practical jokes become harassment while Josiah and Buck are willing to strike back if they believe the harmless attack did emotional damage – anyone outside our small group would have to contend with either Chris Larabee to get retribution, or bring The Judge's attention on the frivolous activities he can pretend to ignore at the moment."
One of the nurses who'd had lots of experience when only a few of the ATF Magnificent 7 team was injured and not yet released to their own homes for further recuperation, opened the door and poked her head in. "I hate to interrupt the party, but other patients are trying to sleep. If you two gentlemen cannot contain your mirth, I will be required to escort you, Standish, out."
"Forgive the intrusion, my dear lovely lady" began Ezra, trying to catch her name.
"Rose" supplied the nurse, bemused at the quick change in conversation. She spotted the brand-new dictionary. "I wonder if learning words and grasping the meanings of common terms, could be so funny." She spoke politely, but firmly.
JD chuckled. Rose and long-term staff and assistants knew how to handle Chris Larabee's team on a one-by-one basis. And hearing them imitating the speech patterns of the after-hour visitors was always a hoot. "Imagining Chris's and Nate's faces when they receive a 'Dummies Guide' to 'Injuries and Common Maladies: How to Inflict Them Without Permanent Injuries and The Best Way To Treat Them Until A Professional Can Arrive'.
Rose's eyes sparkled. "If you can get Chris or Nathan to sign a copy, the Hospital Staff would love it – provided it explains some of the more interesting wounds you gentlemen have been brought in for."
Ezra laughed again. "Rose, you are a rare corundum. Thank you!" He left after bidding JD and Rose goodnight.
Written 28 February 2013