Note: It's nice to see everyone again! I've missed you! ^_^
I've been a little busy working on a new Post-Endgame Fix-It fic that's called 'All Men Must Die'. It's sorta... Stuckony + 1 (but all are equal in the ship!). Pepper/Tony/Steve/Bucky (Pepperstuckony? RescueWinterIronShield?) is the ship I'm going for, and gosh darn it, I WILL SUCCEED! hahahaha :D I'm enjoying writing it so far, and hopefully I'll see some of you over there! :)
I've been doing quite a bit better these days, though still having physical and emotional issues of course, but I'm so glad spring is finally here in Canada. It seemed to take forever this time around!
Much love to all of you, but especially to my best gal, Annaelle (okay, one of my best gals... love you bunches Elmi and Evy! You're all my best gals). But this best gal is stupendous and wonderful and treats my writing like it's hers. Thank you Annaelle for your amazing beta work and for sticking by my side for over three years now. Also, happy birthday! :P
Take care everyone... and good luck to all you Game of Thrones fans! Time for us to go see who dies, who lives, and which kingdom gets turned to dust. xD
Much love, and hugs and kisses to any of you who want them.
November 13th, 1944, 21:35pm, S.S.R. Base, London, Great Britain
Antonia Stark felt different, better than she had in days, honestly, standing up at the front of the war room, looking at the people arrayed before her.
She was still wearing the beautiful blue dress Peggy had loaned her for her earlier dinner—what sorta felt like ages ago now, honestly—but she'd long since shed the dark overcoat and grey scarf. She let the neckline of the dress drape where it wished, not bothering to hide the hint of blue which was spilling up across her skin—she knew what type of image she made, on display for everyone to see, and yet she made no effort to play it up even further, as she once might have done. Casual dominance was much more effective, Peggy had always said, and damn but she was right.
She felt good. Resolved.
Ready to move the fuck on.
"So…" Toni drawled into the silence that had finally settled a few minutes after Steve and Bucky had found their seats. They'd been the last to arrive, and Toni had been momentarily derailed by the way Steve's hair was sticking up, messy and sloppy in a way she would never have dared imagining him. It made him look young and a lot kinder than the strait-laced Captain America look did, and it was that, combined with Bucky's shit-eating grin and the hint of satisfaction that echoed through the underdeveloped bond that clued her into why they were late.
Which, hey, good for them. At least someone was getting some.
Huh. That hadn't felt as snide as she was expecting it to.
Internally shrugging, she stayed put exactly where she was, and let everyone's eyes train in on her before she spoke again. "Colonel Phillips and I had a good discussion about a few things. Set a few things straight. Properly introduced myself and such. Y'know, all those sorts of things people randomly showing up from the future should do and say to the leader of the military base they're staying at." Toni raised an eyebrow, timing it perfectly with a smirk as she observed the different reactions from the other people in the room.
Peggy's eyes crinkled, Dugan choked out a laugh, and Phillips himself was observing the others much like how Toni was doing so—though only with a hint of laughter playing over his lips, instead of the full-out smirk Toni was continuing to sport.
It was Steve's reaction she was most interested in; Steve's and Bucky's both. She had made no indication to them that she was going to be talking to Phillips about this, at least not yet, and so far they had shown a little bit too much heavy-handedness where she and her choices were concerned. So this, in a way, was a test.
A test which gave her… surprising results, actually.
She'd expected annoyance or anger or protestation or even fear at what she might have told Phillips without them actually vetting every word that crossed her lips. She'd expected a bit of shock, a bit of crossness, perhaps a bit of weariness. What she got, instead, was…
"Good idea. The Colonel needed to know, though I was going to suggest telling him when we met with him tomorrow, if you didn't do it on your own during our meeting," Steve said, looking contemplative. He shared a look with Bucky, who nodded at him, before they both turned back to face Toni full-on. "Not that you needed my permission or approval or anything," he said, eyebrow raised right back at her and one of his own smirks on his lips.
"Who are you and what did you do with Rogers?" Toni demanded before she could stop her mouth from forming the words. She stood up straighter and pointed a finger at him, but switched it immediately to point at a now cackling Bucky Barnes. "And you! You—" Toni sputtered, then sighed, and then slouched back to lean against the desk once more, crossing her arms over her chest and rolling her eyes at the lot of them.
"No, I didn't need your permission, thank you for that, Rogers. And shush you, Barnes, he just surprised me is all." She pouted just a little bit but couldn't help relaxing into the ease that was now filling the room. It was probably the closest to comfortable she'd felt with them—all of them, even Peggy, even Dugan—since she'd arrived. There was just something… something which seemed to relax between them all in that brief exchange. Something that obviously hadn't happened in an instant and had probably required some serious thinking on all of their parts before, but it was… it was nice.
But there was still something she needed to get straight with the lot of them, right from the get-go.
"Okay, okay, thanks. I needed that," she admitted, letting herself smile at the both of them unreservedly before she pulled herself back together. "But no, really, back to serious matters. You need to know, I can't really be herded. I don't want to be herded, nor will I allow you to make decisions for me. I want in on anything that concerns me, and I'm planning to make that pretty much everything, got it?" She looked around the room, meeting each and every one of their eyes for a quick second before moving on, not quite waiting around to take in the full extent of their reactions.
"I know that this is the 1940s, but I come from a different time, and I'm a completely different kinda gal—not that you aren't either, Peggy, but you know firsthand what struggles I'm talking about. I was pretty much raised by Peggy, boys—surprise—but in the future where such things as women's rights and feminism have free rein. Well, close to free rein. But no, seriously, just imagine Peggy but with the full freedom to kick as much ass as she wants, and to wear pants if she damn-well wants. Oh, and to cuss like a sailor too, but unfortunately that one is entirely my fault."
Toni laughed, and she was gladdened to see that the rest of them either let out small laughs or smiles of their own—Phillips' smile was in the eyes, but it was still there. She and he had surprisingly found some pretty common ground over the last hour, and she liked him a lot already. She was pretty sure the feeling was mutual, honestly. Which was awesome, because this was Colonel Phillips, arguably just as famous as Captain Ameri—
"Sounds like none of us would've survived," Dugan butt into her thoughts with a laugh. Peggy elbowed him and Bucky choked at the thought of it all, Steve smiling softly, wistfully, with a relaxed posture right beside him. It was… wow, yeah, this was really nice, and Toni felt really happy all of a sudden—and really homesick, too, because damn but this reminded her of how she and Rhodey would interact, Pepper laughing quietly at them, hand delicately covering her smiling mouth…
That brought Toni up short.
Home.
The future.
'Sounds like none of us would've survived.' Dugan's words rung over and over again in her ears.
Fuck. No, some of them wouldn't even survive the next few months if she didn't do something about it. That was what she was here for, and she had a job to do. A promise to keep. A promise to herself, to them, to the world.
She didn't really know how to get back on track, but when in doubt… shock and awe. Shock and awe rarely failed Toni.
"J.A.R.V.I.S., say hi to the group," Toni said suddenly, clearly, catching everyone's attention.
"It's an honor to meet those I have heard so much about," her baby boy said just as clearly, voice sounding from the watch upon her wrist.
Immediately, five pairs of eyes zeroed in on Toni's chest—because of course she'd forgotten to move her arms from their crossed position and now everyone was catching an eyeful and not that that was a bad thing but yeah okay maybe not entirely the right time for that sorta thing.
Toni sighed and uncrossed her arms, reaching to unclasp the watch from around her wrist and setting it on the desk right beside her.
"This, everyone, is J.A.R.V.I.S. Otherwise known as J. Like the letter 'J'. He's a… honestly, I don't really know how to explain it except as a, well, huh, that was in the 1950s, so you wouldn't know the term 'artificial int—''
"Like a robot, right?" Bucky interjected out of the blue, right into Toni's start of what was likely to be a rambling explanation—she seriously had zero clue how to explain things concisely, especially where the history of her favorite subjects applied.
"Uh, well. Sort of?" Toni replied, tilting her head and blinking, surprised.
"What? I like science fiction," he explained with a very disarming smile. "Writers have been discussing this sort of thing for ages. It's like those programmable machines they already have, though some science fiction authors like Butler and Mary Shelley have theorized that there'll be fully-thinking machines that look like humans and even think like us, too."
Toni grinned at him. "Yeah, exactly so." Wow, miracle of miracles, Steve was smiling too, not a trace of jealousy on his features or in the feel of him in the back of her mind—what was going on? But seriously, she wasn't going to look a gift horse in the mouth, especially with this wonderful nerd in front of her.
"I've got three of those at home, actually," she continued with just a touch of sadness. She really missed her boys. "At least I have J with me. He's a bit different, though. My other boys have bodies. Metallic structures. Robots, essentially. J.A.R.V.I.S. here is what they call artificial intelligence. A… well, sort of what Doctor Frankenstein was trying to do with his Monster."
"I resent that, miss," J said drolly.
"No, you resemble it."
"I cannot resemble anything except for servers, miss."
Toni smiled gently in the direction of the watch, and then returned her eyes—and attention—to the rest of the group. "Okay, so the reason I'm introducing you to him is because I'm starting from scratch with all of you. I want to lay all of my cards out on the table, we're going to get some facts straightened out like professionals, and I'm going to tell you some stuff about the future. Stuff that you cannot even imagine will come. Events that you need to know about, and that we need to do something about. I'm here for a reason—" She deliberately didn't look in Steve or Bucky's direction. "—and I think this is it. Part of it," she conceded, knowing that Phillips 'knew' she was Bucky's soulmate.
She might have to correct him on that, letting him know she was also Steve's soulmate. The information might come up eventually on its own, so it might be better to get it out of the way in a controlled manner. But… it could wait. And she couldn't be a hypocrite—she'd asked for them to include her in decisions about her life; she couldn't turn around and do the opposite with their lives.
"So, um, yep. J will be helping me out on some facts. He's like… like an extra brain. An extension of me. He's not connected to his servers… um, never mind that, that's all technical jargon you wouldn't quite get without a long explanation…" she trailed off with a mutter, furrowing her brows. Not sure at all where to go next.
"You had an entire speech prepared, didn't you?" Peggy gently teased. Toni caught her gaze and found only approval there. Enough to bolster her just that little bit more for what she knew she needed—she certainly didn't want to tell them this part—to tell them next.
"Yeah, totally did," Toni admitted softly. "Stage fright."
A snort from Steve's direction. Toni looked his way and saw Bucky looking entirely too innocent and Steve clutching at his ribs closest to his soulmate. Nothing but amusement in the back of her mind, though.
"Rogers is more than familiar with that," Colonel Phillips drawled out, amused. He turned his gaze on Toni next, however, and tilted his end in encouragement. "Go on. You told me just fine earlier, this can't honestly be that much harder, can it?"
"You have no idea." She laughed. "Oh gosh, no, you have no idea. But I'm sure you'll all understand eventually."
Really though.
She could do this.
She'd already told Phillips earlier, like he said, and it's not really like this was something that needed to be kept secret. Didn't necessarily need to be told, either, but she had said she wanted to lay all her cards out—as many as she dared, at least—so that things could go as smoothly as possible. And this way? Well, this way they could protect her from—
"My father. It's about my father," she finally began. "I had this whole speech thing planned in my head like you said, figured I'd be able to get it all out, but that's proving harder than I thought. So. Let's start with the most basic thing. Introductions. Introductions which have to do with who my father was, is, whatever—honestly, story of my life, okay, living in my father's—but yeah, you don't need to hear all that.
"So. I'm sure it surprises no one that I'm not who you think I am—especially because you only met me like… seventy hours ago, seriously what the hell? But anyway. I obviously had my reasons, and pretty much all of them have to do with me not wanting to screw things up, like time itself or whatever. But… I have since decided to do what I do best which is to screw things. Up, that is. Heh. Um. Anyway." She coughed awkwardly and then took a deep breath, trying to calm her manic mind, but she stopped short of letting her eyes shut or letting herself look away from the group.
She looked every one of them in the eyes, even the colonel, who already knew what she was about to say, but then got stuck on Steve's eyes. He was looking at her… almost like he'd already figured it out somehow. Or, really, like he'd figured it out right that fucking moment. His eyes were just the littlest bit wide as they darted over her features, looking both focused and distant at the same time, contemplating exactly what he was taking in—and piecing it together.
For fuck's sake, that man was smart.
If he got it right, of course.
"My name is Antonia. That much is true. But the last name I—fuck it. Just go for it. I'm not a Rhodes—that's my best friend's last name. I… And this is why I know so much about Rebirth and the S.S.R., by the way… Well, it's not like I can prove any of this, I know—okay, I'm getting sidetracked, I'm sorry, I do this all the time!" She took a deep breath, knowing it would soothe her mind just the tiniest bit. Just enough for: "What I'm trying to get out is that my real name is Antonia Elizabeth Stark."
And I am Iron Man, she thought a little hysterically, trying hard not to say the words out loud. It was just rote by this point, seriously. There was practically a whole song and dance that went with it, too.
"So yeah, that's why I know all of you, and probably a lot more than you'd expect, even knowing that I'm Howard's kid. My father went on and on and on about his time with the S.S.R. and the Howling Commandos. He especially liked Steve." Toni tried to hide her grimace—that was a topic for another time… if ever.
Varying looks of surprise crossed four faces—the fifth person already knew as of an hour ago. Steve's, the one she was staring at when she spoke, looked sort of… surprised but in an 'ah-hah I knew it' sort of way—because of course he'd been on the nose. Even if he'd only just pieced it together, seriously, wow, dude had smarts. She'd have to ask him how he figured it out, later. Maybe she'd been super obvious in her lead-up—probably, honestly. Sometimes she was shit at things like this. But he also looked a little consternated, obviously trying to make sense of the last thing she'd said, about Howard liking him better.
She'd seen it here already, so he was obviously aware of it, but Toni was pretty sure she'd be fielding questions about this later. For now, though…
Bucky looked a bit more surprised, but she could see him making the connections in his head, probably from their dinner earlier that evening and their run-in with Howard, really. He looked like it was all suddenly making sense to him, and like he was trying to wrap his—beautiful, truly—brain around the concept of her being Howard's kid.
Yeah, big mood. Seriously. That made two of them.
Hell, that made way more than two of them.
Phillips already knew, and had spent a good ten minutes fact-checking her before he was as satisfied as he could be that she was telling the truth, and so he was taking in the others with as much amusement as she'd seen displayed by the man.
Peggy was leaning back in her chair by the time Toni looked at her, arms crossed and a thoughtful expression on her face. Thoughtful, but not… bad. It looked like she was putting together the clues that Toni had likely left during their conversation that afternoon. Maybe she was wondering how in the hell she'd become godmother and pseudo-aunt to a daughter of Howard's, whom she hadn't been so close with up to this point in the war besides being colleagues. Or maybe she was focusing on the fact that Toni's middle name was the same as Peggy's—subtle, Howard. It was… well, Toni would be sort of creeped out if she were in Peggy's shoes, but she wasn't, so…
Dugan, though… Dugan was totally shocked still, even though it had taken Toni more than long enough to make the rounds to look at him. It was actually… sort of cute. Hah. He looked adorable, with his mouth sort of trying to form words but totally unable to and just…
Toni snorted. Embarrassed, she brought her hand up to her mouth, but it was too late. She couldn't stop laughing. It was like… it was cathartic, almost. Like she was laughing off the stress of the last few days, carrying forward the feeling from minutes ago when they'd all been poking fun at each other and smiling.
She just couldn't. stop. laughing.
Oh my god.
It seemed she wasn't the only one. Bucky started to laugh too, and he was also the first of them to break into the laughter using words. "Howard? Seriously? He—oh my god that's way funnier than it should be, I'm sorry." Toni's heart practically skipped a beat. He looked so beautiful like this, so relaxed and open.
Steve, on the other hand, looked a little green at the gills, even though he was laughing as well. "He… he's been flirting with you, though! That's…"
"Yep." Toni popped the p. "It's super weird. You have no idea."
They all continued to look at her funny.
Phillips just looked amused, though a little tired on top of that, and Toni realized that she should probably move along so that they could all get some sleep—if they could after everything she was about to tell them. She knew she was likely to get zero sleep at all. She'd been sleeping more than usual as it was, but then throw in the really fucked up shared dream she'd had with Steve and Bucky last night, and she had a feeling she'd be avoiding sleep with more determination than ever before.
At least until she could figure out how to stop it from happening.
"Okay, there's a lot I want to tell you, a lot to get through, so there are some things we'll just have to come back to, and this is one of them. I just wanted to be honest with you, and yes; part of that is because I'd really like to get him to stop creeping me out, and I figure having you all in the know will best help with that. But we can figure that out later."
Toni pinched the bridge of her nose and fluttered her eyes shut for a moment.
"Anyway, like I said, Rhodes is my friend's last name and I used to use it on my fake IDs in places that didn't know who I was just from a glance—price of fame, honestly, but I suppose that qualifies as a first world problem. No?" Steve looked semi-comprehending of the issue, but Bucky just blinked at her, and she felt a little silly for using modern slang and being surprised when they didn't catch on as easily as she'd anticipated.
"Uh, I'll teach you that reference later, but for now what I'm asking is that you keep calling me Ms. Rhodes or just 'hey you' or whatever. If you could stick to that, that would be great. Or just Toni works fine, thanks, if at all possible. But do not call me Stark. I just wanted you to know—and no one else. Except for the other Howlies; they can be told, obviously," she added before someone could ask.
Toni flapped her hands in a casual dismissal of the topic—for the moment. "Like I said, we can go over that later. But for now just… sit down and shut up. Please."
The last was added because Peggy was looking at her with easy amusement and it reminded her of her godmother's amusement at her similar levels of rudeness as a teen. "Just listen, because I finally decided to tell you folks about past events—events in your, our I suppose now, future. Future events that occur in this war. Because honestly? I've already fucked things up just by being in the past."
Her mother would murder her for cussing in front of these people, especially Colonel Phillips; goodness, she would. But she forged on, because she had better things to fret over than their opinion of her potty mouth.
Plus it was just really hard to restrain her cussing when she was passionate about something and also didn't really give a damn. So she let her mouth run as free as her thoughts. Well. She reined them in a little, because otherwise no one would be able to follow her train of thoughts.
"The way I see it, I'm here for a reason, and I may as well fuck things up in a way that I can control. That we can control. That doesn't mean go full-tilt into changing things just because I said something. It just means I'm going to do my best to fix a few really fucked up things that happened, because I'm pretty damn sure no one but the enemy benefited from these few things which did happen in my timeline. Well, okay, overall they got their asses handed to them, but there are a few events that could really stand to be tampered with. Ugh, it's enough to give me a migraine, so please suffer with me. This paradox crap sucks, but what's done is done and what will be, now, will be. That's it. Finito. Fin. The end.
"The good news is that this is pretty much the end of the war. Unless something really big happens that changes it all, the Allies will win by Autumn of next year. 1945, that is, unless I'm completely off on my understanding of the current date."
"November 13th, 1944," Phillips supplied readily.
"Thanks. Okay, so yeah. About ten months from now, at least according to the timeline I came from. If it happens the same way or similar enough. I'll be honest, I don't know what me being here means for the future. If it's fated for it to play out the same way, or if I was always meant to go back and change things, or even if what I do change means I'm never actually born and I get erased from the timeline and… see? Migraine-inducing. The whole concept is really screwed up and we're never going to get it right unless we try it out to see what happens, though. So we work with what we've got, and what you've got is, well, me."
Toni sketched a little curtsy in her blue dress, smiling a little lopsidedly. "Toni Stark, at your service, good sirs and lady."
Her eyes crinkled as she smiled back at the others, who were giving her varying degrees of open smiles. Once she straightened, she moved towards the map board behind the desk she had previously been propping herself up on. She pulled down a map of the Ardennes Forest region covering north-eastern France and south-eastern Belgium, as well as the western front of Germany.
Toni had already received permission from Colonel Phillips to mark up his map, and so Toni picked up some pins and red-dyed twine and started to lay down a rough approximation of the front lines she remembered from Peggy's lessons on WWII.
"This here is the front line as it stands right now. And this…" Toni took another minute to set up a couple more lines with the twine. "And this here is where the German front lines will be by Christmas." She plucked the taut string and then stepped aside so that they could all get a good look at the overall picture.
"There's nothing really earth-shattering I can offer you about this battle. Which, as you can see from the shape of the push, is rather aptly—albeit sort of ridiculously—referred to in my time as 'The Battle of the Bulge'. I checked a bit with J.A.R.V.I.S. before coming over here, and we both agreed that we'd pass on the info we know—admittedly not as much as I would like, but it's enough for your sources to work their magic and double-check things and the like. Um." Toni blinked. And paused.
She'd totally forgotten what she was about to say.
"Bastogne and Antwerp, miss," J gently reminded her.
"Yes!" Toni snapped her fingers and then pointed both index fingers at the map. She may be just the teensiest bit hyper-manic.
Hoo boy, she wasn't going to sleep for days, she could totally tell.
"So the whole reason that this last-ditch effort by the crazy Nazis happens, is because his highness Hitler really, really, really wants to get his hands back on Antwerp. Plus whatever other reasons sparked in his delusional mind."
Toni started to pace at the front of the room, passing back and forth before the map they were all studying. "So basically he put as many of his troops into this effort as he could, and his generals kept it secret for as long as possible. If memory serves, they used weather to their advantage, and are even now starting to amass their troops in the region.
"Colonel Phillips will be sending out some carefully-worded missives by code to the Allied Commanders, pretty much stating without lying that he's got info to this effect." The two of them nodded at her, though she didn't stop her pacing. Within a few steps she turned, and her back was now to the man.
"We're not going to bring up me, the time-travelling possible nutcase—in their eyes, though I wouldn't blame you all if you thought it too—" She deliberately didn't look at them when she said that. She had a self-confidence issue, she knew that already, but it wasn't like she would go out of her way to get confirmation people thought ill of her.
"—but the Colonel will make it clear that extra reconnaissance should be carried out in the region for the next month. And different sorts of it, too, not the mostly aerial surveying like what was carried out in my past. J confirmed this for me, and he also confirmed that that and bad weather was how the Germans snuck so much shit into position before the Americans even realized what was going on." Toni scoffed and turned sharply on her heel, nearly overbalancing as a result of wearing shoes that didn't quite fit right.
"Um." Toni paused talking and walking both, not just because she was trying to catch her balance and not make a fool of herself, but also because she was trying to figure out what to say next. Contrary to popular belief, she didn't always have something to say for every situation, didn't have a witty remark prepared at any given time.
A couple of seconds, and regaining her balance, later, she continued. "So really what's happening is that we're simply suggesting the Americans keep a better lookout than what they're presently doing, and Phillips also offered some information from a quote unquote spy that a military strike will be carried out along those lines. And that they should reinforce their land units instead of relying on the air force. Because—nah, that's my brain trying to sidetrack me."
Toni smiled to herself as she remembered how Pep would call her out on that all the time. It was a sweet memory, and Toni wished desperately that somehow she would find a way to get back home, to her friends and family, of both the found and the robot variety.
She would. She promised.
But for now, she had to get through this first. Then she could think of herself.
"Anyway," Toni continued, deciding she'd lean back against the wall to the right side of the map, facing the five others in the room, "that is now pretty much out of our hands, because the S.S.R. is best at precision attacks and smaller scale warfare rather than organizing an army of hundreds of thousands. Not really your style. But as a smaller battle part of the bigger one? Yeah, that sounds about right.
"That brings us to Antwerp and Bastogne. These are the two best options for the S.S.R. to involve themselves with. I know that the Heathers have a presence in Antwerp, correct me if I'm wrong—Peggy?" Toni queried, directing her attention to the other woman, tilting her head just a little to the side.
"Correct," Peggy replied evenly. Her eyes glinted happily in that way they always did when Peggy would talk about her soldiers and spies. She sat up just a little straighter in her chair, though her ankles remained crossed below her seat. Just like Peggy had taught her—a lesson Toni only ever used in the presence of company she respected. "The Dominion Company set up a post to operate out of there, and are coordinating a variety of missions, along with helping Antwerp recover after their recent occupation. Having scouts who look like harmless, unimposing ladies is a tactic which will never grow old."
"I always loved stories of the Heathers as a little girl," Toni remarked with a wide but melancholy smile. It was too bad she hadn't been able to meet any of them as a child, but she was pretty sure her father hadn't allowed it… for whatever reasons that only made sense to him. At least she'd been able to have Peggy in her life. Toni pressed her lips together in a firm line, then moved on.
No sense dwelling on her past when it was entirely possible she was erasing everything she knew of it. When there was a chance she could rewrite everything, change everything.
The thought was both startling and thrilling.
And it was something that would have to be analyzed later. Important, but… it was not the time nor the place.
"Antwerp is strategically important for its port," Toni continued, though she knew they were probably well aware of this, "and it's important to hold it for the supply lines as the Allies advance into the heart of Germany—which we do soon enough, I'm happy to tell you!" There were smiles all around at that, and Dugan even let out a little whoop of excitement. But they all settled down just enough for her to continue, thankfully.
There were so many things she could talk about, so many things that could easily divert their attention away from more current, more necessary, more important things to the here and now.
"But," Toni held up a hand, requesting patience, "we can discuss that and you can grill me for details after I tell you a little about Bastogne. Then we can talk about both of them. At least, that was Colonel Phillips' idea. Sir." She inclined her head in his direction.
"Bastogne essentially becomes what the entire Battle of the Bulge hinges on. It's a small town fairly smack-dab in the center of the fighting, and J.A.R.V.I.S. reminded me that on a few occasions it looked like the Allies might lose there. Our fighters were cut off due to enemies and bad weather both, and most of our efforts to get to them and help fight or help by pulling them out were shot down. And I mean literally."
Toni stopped and grimaced, fighting the urge to wipe away the nasty feeling that seemed to coat her lips and tongue just from talking about them. She succeeded, barely. "We all know the Nazis suck, but a lot of our people were being killed even when they surrendered. Some of it had to do with there being no place to keep prisoners during heavy fighting, some of it was bad weather, some of it was they had barely enough food for them let alone prisoners… and some was because they were bastards and just wanted to kill. They'd already broken basically every Geneva Convention in existence at the time—why not seal the deal? I'm not saying this happened to all or even most, but it was enough of them. Enough for them to redo the Conventions in 1949, seriously."
Toni sighed heavily, unhappily, and gave into that feeling of needing to wipe her mouth. She didn't care how it looked to the others, she just needed to do it—though she did do so rather delicately. She took a moment to pull herself together, and was glad that the others were letting her do so without interrupting.
Toni felt like she was on the cusp of breaking out into tears, and she really did not want to do that in front of these people. She didn't want to risk her already fragile reputation with them, and 1940s people weren't really that into public crying, from what she recalled being told. Mostly by Howard. So perhaps she shouldn't trust his word on that, every time he would yell at her as a child not to cry, that Starks did not cry, they were made of stronger stuff than that, they were—
"My thinking was that we could focus our attention on Bastogne. The Howling Commandos, the 107th, the Heathers if they're able. I don't think there's need to include the Allies—at least not to ask for troops, because I think the people available to the S.S.R. would do the trick. As long as it's not pulling them from anything vitally important.
Toni paused and thought for a second. "It might be beneficial to tell me what they're up to, so they're not pulled from something that would fuck up the future just because we were trying to help in another area. Only if you feel like you can trust me, of course, but then why would you believe me with any of this, if that were the case? Eh, anyway, we just need to be aware of all that and be careful."
"Time travel is so… odd," Steve said, sounding slightly bemused.
Toni smiled at him with some amusement, and he returned it. The smile made her heart beat faster, and she had to pull herself away from him quickly or make an idiot of herself. Because that smile was just lethal. It shouldn't be allowed.
It should be illegal.
Mentally facepalming at herself, she pressed on with her infodump. "Bastogne becomes a hotspot right before Christmas, if memory serves me correctly—"
"You are correct, miss," J butts in overtop of her, and Toni doesn't miss a beat speaking.
"—and it lasts for about… a week—"
"Yes, miss."
"—and it's because all of the main, properly constructed and paved roadways went through the town. So if they wanted to get to Antwerp—which they did, as I said—then they had to go through and control Bastogne. No other route would do, since pretty much every other road was a mire of mud. Thankfully so, as the mud really liked German tanks. So."
Toni clasped her hands together in front of her and rocked from side to side on her feet. "Those are the basics, but I'm prepared to answer any questions you may have, and I know that Colonel Phillips has a lot more info from his sources, and the latest Allied positions. So I suggest that we all go over what we know, ask questions about what we do not know, and you can all pick my brain—or J.A.R.V.I.S.', he's smarter than me, seriously—for any information I may be able to provide.
"But remember…" she warned, voice serious, "things I know might change just because I'm here in the past. We don't know what or how much, or even when, possibly. But I can give you what I know, we can check it all out here in the present, as much as you, or we, can, and you can decide what you want to do with all of the info."
The room was quiet as they digested what Toni said. She felt a hint of focus coming from her—from Steve and Bucky, coupled with a sense of determination from Steve and wonder from Bucky. Probably from the whole concept of time travel and her knowing what was to come, and telling it to them, or at least that was Toni's best guess at what the feeling meant.
Before anyone could say something—it was only a matter of time in a room filled with people such as them—Toni sat down in the seat left open for her at the conference table, and mentally prepared herself for the shitstorm she was about to bring about, the awfulness she was about to unveil… the devastation of this next conversation that was necessary to—hopefully—avoid the horror of the months to come.
"There's something else you need to know," she said into the quiet.
All eyes fell back on her, and she had to will herself not to shift uncomfortably like she so desperately wished to do.
"It's about Steve and Bucky," she continued. Colonel Phillips looked at her curiously; she had only spoken to him about her identity and the Battle of the Bulge. Not this. This was something better told to Steve and Bucky first—but the Howlies also needed to know, since it concerned them, so having at least three of them present, plus the Colonel and Peggy, worked for now.
"The Commandos need to know as well, since they were present on this mission as well—"
"Toni…" Bucky butted in, his voice impatient but his mind screaming worry at no one in particular in the back of her head.
She ignored him. She was getting there at her own pace, damn it.
Toni took a breath, and looked back at the map to her left, drawing the lines of the countries and front lines with her eyes.
"I know how and when both of you die," she said, as clear and precise as she could.
The silence was deafening; even quieter than moments before.
"I know how, but I think… I think we can prevent it. I obviously can't do it alone, but if we all work together…"
Toni finally looked at Steve—who had gone paler than she'd ever seen him, and who was looking at Bucky like he wanted to take him into his arms and never let go, but couldn't because Phillips was there, though he was probably a few seconds away from not giving a shit anymore.
And then she looked at Bucky—who was staring back at Steve, eyes wide as if he were trying to memorize the shape of him in under ten seconds, fingers clenching and unclenching sporadically.
Toni smiled sadly, scared for them and upset that she had to tell them all of this. Upset that she had to go into the details she'd learned straight from Howard, Peggy, and the other Howlies' mouths, and from all of the research—and hacking, because of course the government kept all the juicier details—she had done. But… well, why else was she sent to the 1940s, soulmate to two men fated to die, if not to screw things up entirely and save them?
If one could call that 'screwing up', though.
Really, though, she had to. No one else could, so it was on her, but she wished that she could just wrap them up in bubble wrap and hugs to protect them, or take them back to her time, or fly them to, say, Nicaragua or the Arctic or Canada or, or… somewhere she could hide them from all the horror. But also knowing that she couldn't; that these men would never want to leave when there were injustices that needed correcting. When they could protect people. Save people.
They were here to stay. So they all had to make sure that they did stay.
That they wouldn't die.
Toni glared at no one in particular, righteous anger starting to rise in her as she clenched her hands tighter and tighter.
"If we do it together, we can succeed. While still fighting those Nazi and Hydra fucks. Because screw that. No one's taking my—no one's taking you both away from this world. The world needs you. So I say let's figure out what we're doing next, tell Fate or the Universe or whatever to go fuck itself, and let's do this our way."
Note: Phew! Okay, that was an information-heavy but very important chapter! It's not quite the conversation that many of you have been yelling at the three of them to have, but it's necessary and a step in the right direction, and will definitely lead to the three of them sitting down and talking like grown adults!
But hey, this meeting/conversation/lecture they're having (and are continuing in the space after this chapter) will definitely lead to all three of them thinking more highly of each other. At least that's how I will be seeing it and writing it. :)
Anyway, I really hope you liked this. I've been slaving away at it for weeks, trying to get the balance of info and moving-the-story-the-heck-along just right. Because we really do need to move things along!
Next chapter will deal with Bucky and Steve handling what they learn about their would-be deaths. That's gonna be fun. o.o
Next chapter will also have the group leaving for a new adventure! :D Finally! I WILL make things go boom! I am SO excited for that, you have no idea lol! ;D So excited.
If you're wondering why Toni didn't tell them about the Holocaust and concentration camps, don't worry or think that she's forgotten or is uncaring or whatever… there's a reason, and the topic of the camps, etc. will come up in future chapters for sure.