Chapter 14:
"Leah!" Jake calls. Rain begins to fall as I step out from under the porch. I walk and inside my heart an intense pain grows. "Leah, wait!" His arm grabs mine and spins me to face him.
"What Jake?" I ask as the rain beats against my face. "What else could you possibly want?"
"I want you." He says and his eyes are smoldering but all I can feel is the pain in my heart.
"No you don't Jake." I say and shake my head.
He pulls me closer, inches from him. The rain beats against me and drops dance down my cheeks. "Yes I do Leah. Believe me; I want you more than anything."
I shake my head. "You don't know what you want Jake, and I'm going to let you figure that out. We can work, or we can't, it's always been up to you Jake. Obviously you aren't sure what you want because you did this, you knew how I would feel about it, and you risked us. But I will probably look past it because you drive me crazy, but I know I would do anything for you. But you need to figure out what you want; I can't keep playing these games. I have other people to think of. So I'll be seeing you Jake."
I walk down the street as the tears mix with the rain and run down my face. I rub my hand on top of my stomach.
I'm almost home, "Leah!" Jake's voice yells. "Leah! Wait!" I stop, close my eyes, and I take a deep breath. I hear his feet pound against the pavement. "Leah! I love you!" He says and he comes to a stop.
"What?" I ask even though I heard what he said. I wanted to hear the words again. I slowly turn towards him. He's panting and the rain beats on his skin.
"I said I love you," He says and his eyes are smoldering again. "I want you Leah. I know what I want. It's you and our babies growing inside of you. It's a house on the ridge that overlooks the ocean just like we've talked about. It's staying in bed with you all day long just holding each other. It's the smell of your hair when I'm holding you. It's the feel of your lips against mine. That's what I want Leah. That's what I need." He says.
First, I think he's just saying it to get me back. I should just walk away and forget everything. Then, I realize I can't just walk away. I'm in too deep. I love him too much. I know he loves Bella, but maybe he loves me more. I can't expect him to just forget about her and stop caring, because I haven't done that with Sam. I still love him and care about him. So I guess I see where he came from.
My heart racing, I run over to him and I wrap my arms around his bare upper body. He holds me tight. "I love you Jake." I whisper after holding him in my arms for a while and I bury my face in his chest. He kisses the top of my head. "I get why you did it. But next time, let me in okay?" I say into his chest. He kisses the top of my head and I look up to him. He smiles and nods. I kiss him softly and then I pull away. He lifts my chin and his lips crash against mine. We stood there and kissed in each other's arms and it ended all too soon.
"Leah?" My mom asks and she comes out on the porch.
I pull away blushing. The one night she was home, happened to be the most romantic night of my life and she was in the perfect position to ruin it. I turn to face her. "Yeah mom?"
"You are going to get a cold." She says. It was such a mother thing to say it kind of made me happier, maybe she was finally coming back. "Come inside."
I take Jake's hand and we walk up to the porch.
"Hi Jake," my mom says, half-friendly, half-worried-motherly.
"Hi Sue." He says and he looks down as we enter the house.
"I'm going to work." Mom informs. "Make sure Seth gets in at a decent hour. " I nod. "And don't go out in the rain. You have others to think about now." She says and looks to my stomach that was now in plain sight as my clothes were sticking to me. I place my hand on my stomach instinctively and then I nod.
"Night Mom." I say.
"Goodnight," she smiles and then she leaves.
"I'm going to run home and get a change of clothes. I'll be right back." Jake smiles. I nod and then he runs out of the house. I slide off my shoes, which were hurting my swelling feet actually; I should have taken them off before I started walking home.
I notice Mom didn't clean up the kitchen so I do that really quickly. Maybe she wasn't completely better, but today was progress.
I walk upstairs and start getting my shorts and a loose t shirt out. I peel off my jeans and I throw on my shorts. I lift my shirt over my head. I examine my swollen stomach. It looked like I was already four months. I rubbed my hands on top of it.
Arms wrap around me and they rest on top of my stomach. I lean against him, recognizing the scent. He rubs his hands on top of my bare stomach and I feel so calm.
I turn to him and smile. I pull my shirt over my head and then I go and lay in bed. Jake joins me after he pulled his shirt off and he slides in beside me, holding me in his arms.
"I'm going over to the Cullens tomorrow. I have a checkup. You can come if you wanted to." I say and I run my finger over his chest, tracing every indention.
"I'm on duty tomorrow." He says, and I nod. "I'll come by when I'm done okay?" He looks deeply into my eyes. I pull in closer and nod.
"Maybe one of these days you'll be able to," I smile and he nods and kisses the top of my head. His hand subs my arm as he holds me. "Jake we can't fight anymore, for them." I say and look to my stomach. "We have to be good enough for them."
He pulls me in tighter. "I know Leah." He whispers.
I cuddle against his chest and I end up falling asleep just like that.
I roll over and I feel paper crumbling. I flicker my eyes open and see a note with a red tulip on top of it.
I grab the piece of paper and I hold it up for me to read.
Gone on duty. I didn't want to wake you.
I'll meet you at the Cullens a little
later. I hope you slept well. I love you.
I'll be seeing you
-Jake.
I smile and I grab the tulip and I take in its sweet scent. I get up, take a shower and I get dressed in some of the clothes Rose and Alice bought me.
I lay the tulip on my dresser and I run downstairs to get a glass to put it in. When I come downstairs I see Seth sitting on the couch watching TV. I smile to him.
"Someone is happier than the last time I saw her." Seth says but he doesn't sound very interested.
"Yeah, I guess I am." I say. "Have you eaten?"
"Yeah, but that was a couple hours ago." He says.
"So then you want some food before I go then?" I ask him.
He nods, "That would be good." I head toward the kitchen and he looks at me. "Where are you going?" Suddenly he wasn't interested in whatever sports news was on, he was interested in where I was going. I smile.
"I have a checkup today so I'm going to the Cullens." I say.
"Oh…" He says. "You are going there alone?"
I laugh a little. "Yes Seth I am. I'm not scared to go by myself. Plus there is really nothing to worry about."
"You don't have to make me anything," he says, "Embry and me are going over to Emily's later anyways. I think she's making muffins."
"Are you sure?" I ask. He nods. "Well okay then. I'll just eat this on the way." I say and grab an apple.
I also grab a skinny glass, fill it with some water, and I rush up to my room. I place the tulip gently in the glass and then I set the glass beside my bed. I grab my bag and slide on my shoes.
I stop by Seth on the way out. "Don't get into any trouble." I say.
He smiles to me. "Coming from you, the queen of getting into trouble."
"You didn't tell Mom about all my outbursts about the 'war' did you?" I ask.
He shakes his head. "When have I seen Mom?"
I shrug. "Okay, well don't. She already thinks I'm 'troubled' as it is." I say. " I might find out the genders of them." I smile.
"What do you think it is?" Seth asks.
"A girl and a boy." I smile. "Wish me luck." I turn and open the door.
"Luck," Seth says as I walk out and close the door. I smile and begin walking to the Cullens.