Hanna POV
"Hey Sweetie." My mom says when she comes downstairs to make breakfast.
"Hey mom." I say back. I am sitting at the counter researching parenting articles.
My mom looks over my shoulder and says, "5 mistakes divorced parents make? Why would you be reading that?"
"No reason. I just thought it would be good to know." I reply. There is a reason. I'm just not sure if this is going to happen or not.
"So does pancakes sound good to you?" My mom asks me. I nod my head yes and go back to reading. While I was reading countless articles, I heard my moms phone ring. She looked very annoyed but I just go right back to my reading. I never knew how bad you could mess up a kid. You do one wrong thing and it could screw them up for the rest of their life. If you don't discipline a child enough, they will become spoiled but if you discipline them too much then they will resent you when they grow up. It is amazing how we have any good people in the world.
"Okay I will tell her. Bye." My mom says as she hangs up the phone.
"Shit!" She says leaning over the counter next to the stove. She looked troubled. Before I could ask who was on the phone she spun around to face me and said, "We forgot to tell your father about the babies. That was him on the phone. He wants to meet you for lunch tomorrow."
Crap how could I forget to tell my father? Well maybe if he cared more to call me more than three times a year we would have a better relationship.
"Do I have to go?" I ask.
"Well yeah. Would you rather have him come visit at some point and see two little kids running around? You would have more explaining then than you do now." She replies.
"Ughh I don't like seeing him normally let alone when I never told him something that is majorly affecting my life." I complain.
"Well I guess you should have thought about this before you brought it on yourself." My mom says somewhat disgusted.
"Are you still mad?" I ask her.
After a couple moments she sighs and says, "No of course not. You just need to know that this is your life now."
"I know and I am doing my best to deal with this on my own. This isn't as easy as I thought it would be."
"No its not and it is only going to get harder after the twins are born. I am amazed that you didn't think of any of this." I can tell she is starting to get mad.
"Are you still okay with me living here after the twins are born?" I ask hesitantly. I don't know where I would go if she kicked me out.
"Of course Hanna. You are my daughter and I will always love you. I just wish you didn't get yourself into this mess but I would never make you leave." She tells me.
"I love you mom." I tell her.
"Love you too sweetie. Now eat your pancakes." As I begin to eat my pancakes, someone knocks on the door. "I'll get it." My mom says.
"Caleb." I hear her say. What is Caleb doing here? I haven't seen him since he got mad and walked out.
"Hello Mrs. Marin. Is Hanna home?" He asks.
"Yes. She is just eating breakfast in the kitchen. Come in." She says and she walks him to the kitchen, "I am going to leave you two alone."
"Caleb what are you doing here?" I ask him.
"I came to apologize." He says while taking a seat next to me.
"I am the person who she be apologizing to you. I am the one who messed everything up. I knew I was probably going to lose you when I went to do this but I still did it. To be honest, I am starting to regret it now." I say looking down.
"Even though I still don't understand I shouldn't have just left you like that. I loved you. I still do."
"Really?"
"Always but I know that you are dating Emily now."
"Yeah."
"Do you love her?"
"I don't know."
"I have to say I was really surprised when Ezra told me you guys were dating. I never had suspected that you could have been gay." He says and for some reason his words really hurt me.
"Something just feels different when we are together."
"I understand. I really do miss seeing you though."
"Can we be friends?" I ask him.
"I would love that." He says and then hugs me. My mom walks back in when we are hugging.
"How sweet. I guess you guys made up."
"We did." I tell her.
"And Caleb are you going to be around after the twins are born?" She asks.
" Definitely. Hanna and I are staying friends." He says smiling at me.
"Good. Those kids deserve to have their father in their lives. I have to go to work. You guys have a good day," My mom says and Caleb's face drops.
"Thanks mom. You too." I reply as she walks out the door. I look at Caleb and he is just staring at me.
"Why did she just say that to me?" He asks slowly.
"So I haven't really told her how this exactly happened. She thinks it was by accident and that you are the father." I said hesitantly.
"Are you kidding me? " He asks while rubbing his face with his hands. "So your mom now thinks I am the terrible person who just leaves his girlfriend when she tells him she is pregnant?"
"Uh yeah."
"Hanna I think this is even worse than before now." He says.
"You can leave if you want."
"Hanna, no. I am not just going to leave. I just don't get why you are living in a web of lives. I understand that you had to lie all the time when A was threatening everyone but that is over now. You don't have an excuse for all these lies."
"I am so sorry Caleb. I do plan on telling her the truth. I just don't know when to do it. I promise I will never lie to you again. You are way too important to me and I don't want to lose you again." I say wholeheartedly to him.
"Okay. I trust you. I just hate that your mom thinks that this is all my fault."
"I know. I promise I will tell her within the week."
"Are you happy?" He asks me.
"What? Why would you ask that?"
"I just want to know if you are happy with this new life with Emily and the twins plus all the other changes happening."
"Truthfully, not as happy as I thought I was going to be."
"Why do all this then? You can make yourself happy again. You just have to fix everything."
"I am going to. I just need to think about what makes me happy first."
"That's good. God I really missed seeing your face all the time." He says looking straight into my eyes.
"I missed you too. I really did." I smile at him.
"Unfortunately I have to get to work but are you free tomorrow to hang out?" He asks.
"I have to have lunch with my father but then I am free afterwards."
"You are having lunch with your father?"
"Yeah its that time when he thinks 'Oh I should probably pretend to care about my other daughter for a day.' That and I have to tell him about the twins."
"He doesn't know you are pregnant."
"No. Somehow I forgot to tell him. Can you tell how upset I am about that?" I ask clearly not upset that I forgot to tell my father.
"He doesn't deserve to see you or know what is going on in your life." He says getting angry. He has been with me through everything when my father kept hurting me emotionally over and over again.
"It is just going to be a time for him to get to say how much better of a daughter Kate is."
"That skanky bitch has nothing on you. You are the most caring person I know." He says.
"Thanks Caleb. Don't you have to get to work?" I ask.
"Yes. Call me when you get done with your dad."
"Okay. Thanks for coming over Caleb." I say to him.
" Anytime. I really do mean that." He says and leaves.
The rest of the day is pretty boring and dull. I became to get anxious to see my father tomorrow. I have no idea how I am going to tell him that I am pregnant.
The more I thought about it, the more time that past and before I knew it, it was a new day and time to leave and go meet my father at the brew.
"Hey Em." I say as I enter the brew.
"Hey Han. What are you doing here?" She asked confused.
"I am meeting my father here." I say with a frown.
"Oh. What's wrong?"
"He doesn't know about them." I say as I put my hand on my stomach.
"Good luck. Do you want me to bring you anything?"
"No. I am going to wait until my father comes. Thanks though." I say to her as I go to find a high top table that would high my stomach from my father when he comes in. I could probably just get away with sitting behind the table and not telling him at all but he would find out eventually anyway so I may as well get this over with now.
I find the perfect table in the corner of the café; Just in time too because as soon as I sit down, my father walks in.
"Hello Mr. Marin. Hanna is waiting for you in the corner." Emily says pointing to me.
"Thank you Emily." He says and walks over to me, "Hello Hanna bug."
"Hi." I say quickly. My palms were sweating profusely and I was sure I was about to get a full-blown panic attack.
"So your mom says you have something to tell me."
"Um yeah I guess."
"What is it?" He asks. I take a deep breath in and carefully stand up. I don't take my eyes off of my fathers face during this process. As soon as he sees the reason I stood up, I see a wave of emotions flash over his face.
"You're pregnant?" He asks after a while. I nod my head. "How did this happen?"
"Well you see, when someone-" I begin to joke.
"Hanna this isn't a time to joke. Tell me what happened." He says sternly.
"It isn't how you think it would happen." I begin to say and then I explain everything including the part where Emily helps me.
"So this is Emily's fault!" He shouts and I look over to Emily. She immediately looks over to us, scared for her life.
"No dad. I am the only person responsible. It was my idea." I say, feeling even worse about my life.
"Hanna Marin, I am completely disappointed in you." He says disapprovingly.
"That's a shock." I snap back.
"What is that supposed to mean?"
"That you don't care about me anyway so it doesn't really matter. Just go back to Kate and Isabel. I know that they can give you the perfect family you expect. I look forward to your phone call in four months unless you forget again."
"How dare you say that to me." He says back. At that moment, I feel a sharp pain in my stomach and yelp. "What's wrong?"
It takes me a few seconds to be able to respond, "Braxton Hicks. I have been getting them all day."
"How far along are you exactly?"
"30 weeks."
"And you didn't think it would be a good idea to tell me?" He asks angry but I could tell he was somewhat hurt by this.
"It wasn't that I didn't want to tell you. I just forgot to tell you. Plus, you never want to talk to me anyway. You are always too busy with your new family."
"That's not true."
"Yes it-" I start to say but then get interrupted by another fake contraction.
"Are you okay?" He asks.
I hold up one finger and barely get out the words, "Hold on." Once the pain finally subsided I was finally able to say, "I guess you should also know that I am having twins."
"Wow." That was all he said.
"But seriously you don't have to stick around."
"Han don't be like that. I do want to see you. I just have to work all the time. I blame myself."
"For what?"
"Maybe if I was around more you wouldn't have been pregnant right now. Maybe I could have raised you to be smarter. I knew I shouldn't have let you say with your mother." He says. My jaw clenched as soon as he said that.
"Don't you ever say that again!" I yelled and people began to stare at us.
"Excuse me? Don't you ever speak to me like that again." He says. Before I could respond, I get another contraction. This is the worst one yet. I hold my stomach in agony.
"When did these contractions start?"
"5 or 6 A.M.?" I reply unsure.
"Hanna, I don't think these are Braxton Hicks. I need to get you to the hospital. I think you are in labor.
"I can't be. I am not due for another 10 weeks."
"Well I guess they have another plan for you. Come on." He says as he takes my hand and walks me over to the exit.
"Hanna what is going on?" She asks seeing me in pain.
"My father thinks I am in labor. Please text the other girls." I say as another contraction hits.
"Okay I will get someone to cover my shift and I will be right over."
I continue to walk out of the brew with my father and soon enough we are almost at the hospital. Thank god this town is very small but this ride still felt really long.
As soon as we entered the hospital, it seemed like everyone could tell that I was ready to have these babies and they rush me straight to a room. Right now the doctor is checking to see how dilated I am.
"Okay Hanna, you seem to be about seven centimeters dilated. There is nothing we can do to stall the labor so today is the lucky day. You will have to decide if you would like to get an epidural because this is the only time we can give it to you." The doctor informs me.
"Give it to me." I say and throw my arms up which made everyone in the room laugh. The doctor then leaves to get everything prepped. "Did you call mom?" I ask my father who has been sitting very quietly in the corner.
"Yeah." He says very shortly.
"Are you okay?" I asked confused.
"I just never thought my day would end up like this. It never would have crossed my mind that I would be taking my child to the hospital because she was in labor."
"I'm sorry."
"I still blame myself. I think I am going to have to have a long talk with your mom."
"You know what? If you want to be like this then just leave. I don't need you making me anymore stressed than I already am."
"Well Hanna this isn't going to be a happy time because, really, I think you screwed up. This event is only happy when the person is ready for a baby, someone who is actually capable of raising a child. You won't be able to handle it." He said and now I was furious.
"Get out!" I shouted.
"Excuse me?" He said shocked.
"Just get out! I never wanted to see you in the first place because this is always how it ends."
"Fine Hanna. I will go. I will call you tomorrow." He says and walks out, something that he knows all to well how to do.
"Doubt it." I mumble.
"Alright Hanna. Are you ready?" My nurse asked me.
"They are coming already?" I ask and my eyes went wide.
"No sweetie. Are you ready for the epidural? You are progressing very quickly though so it won't be long." She replies.
"Great." I say and she walks me through what is going to happen and then finally gives me the epidural. I love this stuff! I was finally able to relax because I couldn't feel anything.
"Hanna! Are you okay?" My mom asked after barging into the room.
"I'm fine mom. I just got an epidural and they say it won't be long until I have to start pushing." I tell.
"Oh hunny I am so sorry I couldn't get here sooner." She says while coming over and giving me a hug. For the next half hour my mom and I just talked. It was really nice because we haven't just gotten to talk to each other in a long time. She told me about the day I was born and how bad of a baby I was. Her stories made both of us laugh and I was extremely grateful to have one parent that helped make this day go by better.
During one of her stories where I refused to eat anything and would just throw it on the walls, someone knocked on my door.
"Can we come in?" Aria asked.
"Of course." I tell them.
"Hello girls." My mom says as she gets up.
"Hi Mrs. Marin." They reply to her.
" I am going to let you girls talk for a little while. I will be out in the hall if you need me." She says as she leaves.
"Where is Addie?" I ask Aria.
"She is in the waiting room with Ezra." She responds.
"How bad is it?" I ask nervously.
"You tell me. You were there. Hell I had an audience." She said which made us laugh.
"I meant how bad does it hurt?"
"So picture the worst pain you were ever in and then multiply it by 100." She says like it was nothing.
"That sucks." I say with tears in my eyes.
"Did you get the epidural?" She asks and I nod my head yes. "Well then as long as it doesn't wear off, you should be fine."
"Did Caleb ever come talk to you?" Aria asked which surprised me.
"Yeah. How did you know that?" I ask.
"Ezra told me that he wanted to talk to you." She responds. Crap I was supposed to call him after I was done with my father. I guess plans have changed a little.
"Can you hand me my phone Em?" I ask her.
"Sure. Is everything okay?"
"Yeah. I was just supposed to hang out with Caleb after I had lunch with my father so I have to tell him I can't now." I say and begin to dial his number.
"Hey Han are you done with your dad?" Caleb asks when he picks up the phone.
"Not exactly. My father left but I am actually in the hospital now."
"What did he do to you? I am going to kill him." He says getting angry.
"My father didn't hurt me unless you count emotionally but that is another story. Anyway, the babies are on their way." I say.
"Are you kidding? I will be right there.: He says and before I could say anything else, he hung up.
"What's going on?" Emily asked.
"He is on his way."
"Alright Hanna. Oh sorry I didn't know you had company in here. I have to check to see how far you have progressed. They can stay if you want. It will only take a minute." The doctor says.
"They can stay. They are like family." I tell him. He starts to check me and I say to the girls, " I am really glad you guys are here."
"Hanna, we will always be here for you." Aria says.
"Hanna you are at 10 centimeters. It is time to do this." The doctor says.
"Good luck Hanna." Emily says.
"We will be waiting outside." Spencer says.
"I will send your mom in." Emily says as well.
"Thanks." I say to them as they leave.
10 seconds later my mom comes running in once again and says, "Oh baby girl, soon you are going to have your own children. My little girl is grown up." She starts to cry.
"Please don't cry mom." I say to her.
"I hate to break this up but Hanna you really need to start pushing." The doctor says.
"Okay." I reply and look to my mom. She smiles and holds my hand. It seems like I am pushing forever but really it was only 30 minutes. My first little boy finally arrives though and I feel so relieved. It is half way over but I am dreading when I have to push again. The doctor lays him on my chest and gets ready for the next one to come.
"You are doing great." My mom says to me. The nurse then comes and takes the baby from me. She tells me that she is getting him cleaned up.
It takes a while but soon enough my second little boy has joined the world. I think I am happier that I can relax now though.
"Okay Hanna since they came way earlier than expected, we need to take them directly to the NICU. They might not have any problems but we are concerned that their organs have not had enough time to fully develop." He says.
"What happens if they aren't fully developed?" I ask worried.
"Well they would have to stay in the NICU as long as it takes for them to develop more. The length depends on how severe they need help. Please don't worry though because we are doing everything in our power to make sure they are healthy." He says to me.
I turn to my mom and say, "I'm scared mom."
"Then you are a mother." She says to me.
"What?"
"You know you are a mother when you are scared. " She says which makes me give her a faint smile. Something starts to feel weird again but I don't know what is going on.
"Mom, I feel like I have to push again." I say to her.
"Okay I will go get someone." She says.
A minute later the doctor comes back in, "So you feel like you have to push again?" I nod my head. "It is probably just the afterbirth ready to come out." I start to wine not wanting to push again. "Don't worry you only have to push slightly this time."
"Thank god!"
I push lightly but nothing happens. "That's odd. Can you give me a big push?" The doctor asks. I do my best to push but I am so tired. "Okay that didn't work. Can you give another push, the biggest one you got?"
I try with all my might and the doctor say, "There you go. There is something coming out. Push one more time."
I comply and as I push I feel something come right out. The look on the doctors face isn't good though. Without saying anything, he goes into the hallway and shouts for a nurse. Then he whispers something to her but I can't hear what it is.
Once he comes back in, I ask, "What is wrong?"
"So it looks like you are about to have another baby, however, the baby is footling breeched. This means that the baby is coming out feet first instead of headfirst. So we are going to have to work fast here. I need to keep pushing really hard so this baby doesn't get hurt, okay?" He explains and I can't even believe what I am hearing.
"Okay" I say really confused. I begin to push like never before. I don't want this baby to be hurt because I was too tired. I was pushing so hard that the third baby came out in two pushes. This time, however, the nurse doesn't put the baby on my chest. She immediately takes the baby out of the room.
"What is going on?" I keep asking but no one would answer me. I ask again, but this time I yelled, "What is going on!"
The doctor walks back into my room flustered, "I am so sorry Hanna. We weren't able to find a heartbeat for the last baby."
What?