[Normandy SR-2 - CIC]
Shepard came to a standstill in front of Samantha, the gauntlet that had protected her right hand in battle now falling to the floor with a loud clunk. Her green eyes—partially obscured by her visor—emanated concern. She placed her right hand on Samantha's face and turned it to the left. A trickle of blood ran down Traynor's temple, slowly but surely gaining volume.
"What happened to you?"
Samantha could hear the barely repressed distress in Shepard's voice. Behind her, some of the Normandy's crew were uneasily shuffling their feet, unsure whether this was a moment they should be privy to, yet also unsure whether they should leave. The Commander made a habit out of debriefing them immediately after the mission when possible. Samantha looked at Shepard's hand coming off her face. It was red with...blood?!
Samantha gasped. She put her own hand to her temple and got the same result as Shepard. She must've hit her head harder than she thought. "I...uh, I didn't know I...am bleeding?"
Shepard, her concern growing, dismissed the rest of the crew with an impatient flick of her hand before turning her attention to Samantha again. "You're going to see Dr. Chakwas."
Samantha felt Shepard taking her hand, urging her to follow her to the elevator. Some foolish—childish, perhaps—part of Samantha didn't want to go see the doctor again. Wanted her to resist. Aside from some pain here and there, she felt fine. Shepard was back. That was all that mattered.
"I think I'll be alright."
Shepard turned around. For a split second, Samantha swore she could see fury in those emerald eyes. It was gone as quickly as it had appeared, replaced by worry. "Samantha, you obviously have wounded your head. You should have it looked at by Dr. Chakwas." Shepard looked around. "What the hell happened here anyway? Why are you wounded? Didn't Joker initiate protocol C200?" Shepard gave the bridge a stern glare.
She tugged at Samantha's hand again, who now found herself following reluctantly.
"He did. I just...didn't listen." Samantha braced herself for Shepard's response.
"You didn't listen? You didn't—then what did you do, Traynor?" Shepard barked while furiously assaulting the elevator button with her finger. She was clearly angry now.
Sam winced.
"I...I went down to the engineering deck and...I—uh, I...wired into the comm feed to be able to hear what's going on with the missi—you." Samantha forced herself to look Shepard straight in the eyes. Tears were forming, stinging. She didn't understand why Shepard was so angry. She had only wanted to be kept in the loop. Even if that meant she had to disobey an order and hack into the comm feeds. She didn't do it to spite Shepard. She hadn't been able to stop herself...
She only received a glare in response.
The Commander dragged Samantha into the elevator as soon as it opened. Her mouth was set in a grim line. "We will talk about this later."
[Normandy SR-2 - Mess Hall]
Samantha had been with Dr. Chakwas for nearly an hour. As soon as she stepped out of the med bay she was met by Shepard, who was still wearing her armor. Apparently, she had been waiting in front of the med bay the whole time, not even bothering to get her gear or herself checked out after the mission on Rannoch. The Commander looked more tired than angry at this point, yet Samantha still didn't dare to speak. She remembered Shepard's anger all too well and didn't want to fuel it again. She looked at her in silence.
It was Shepard who spoke first.
"Are you alright?"
What do I say? I don't want her to get angry with me again.
Samantha nodded. She felt two warm hands gripping her shoulders. Shepard had at least taken the other gauntlet off.
"I'm sorry I snapped at you. I was worried. I...I guess I couldn't bear seeing you hurt." Shepard's tone was low, soft. Apologetic.
Samantha looked up and smiled at her. "It's alright. I'm glad you came back alive and whole." Her features turned pensive. "I was so scared you'd die down there...I just had to hear what was going on. I'm sorry. I know it was irresponsible."
It was Shepard's turn to smile. She gazed at Samantha, her eyes taking on a softness reserved only for the people she held most dear. She squeezed Sam's shoulders and then pulled her into a hug, forgetting for a moment that she was still wearing armor. Samantha met cold steel and giggled involuntarily. Shepard took a step back and flashed a lopsided grin.
"Oops. Sorry. Um...can we continue this conversation in my cabin? I promise I'll take my armor off."
Samantha nodded rapidly.
"Just give me a few minutes to get changed. I want James to take a look at my armor and get some things fixed before the next mission. Meet you in my cabin in twenty?" Shepard asked.
[Normandy SR-2 - Shuttle Bay]
"Hey, Lola! Heard you killed a Reaper and pulled off a show in the CIC. I haven't decided yet which is more picante."
Shepard shook her head as she approached Vega. He watched her with an amused grin.
"Reapers are nothing compared to the trouble women can give. Trust me." Shepard commented as she tossed her breastplate toward him. James caught it easily and snorted in approval.
"Which is why I like to stick to men!" Steve chipped in from underneath one of the Kodiak shuttles.
"Glad to hear your voice again, amigo." James remarked teasingly while receiving the rest of the Commander's armor. "What do you want me to do with that sexy armor of yours, Lola?"
Shepard shook her head again, but grinned. "I want you to check my sensory equipment. During the last mission I had the feeling it wasn't working correctly. Specifically the lower backside sensors."
Vega turned her armor over in his big hands. He inspected some wires in her hardsuit. It was amazing how much tech went into Shepard's Spectre-issued armor. It looked smooth but as hard as rock on the outside, but was wired to the max on the inside. Most wires connected the central receiver to sensors throughout the whole armor set. Shepard's visor could then display the information gathered by the sensors, enabling her to monitor her shield status and vitals precisely. This information was crucial for her when, for one, deciding when to use her tactical cloak. Her deadly omniblade was generously wired as well. James fingered a sensor and huffed.
"I see the problem. Don't worry, Lola, I'll get it fixed. You'll be running around looking hot and dangerous again in no time."
Shepard nodded and turned around to walk away, then turned back and spoke nonchalantly. "Oh, and if you have the time, take out any dents, Vega."
Steve chuckled. James looked up and shot him the bird.
"Yeah, yeah, whatever, pendejo. Going to have a chat with the lady, Lola?"
Shepard, feigning calmness, waved her hand dismissively. "Something like that."
[Normandy SR-2 - Captain's Cabin]
Samantha walked into the Commander's cabin and looked around. It was empty. Where is she? Aren't her quarters usually locked when she's not in?
She walked around uncertainly, not knowing whether she should stay or leave. Shepard's terminal beeped green with messages. She never checks her messages if I don't tell her to. Some clothes were lying haphazardly on the floor. The hamster scurried away when Samantha walked over to look at it. She heard a faint sound of running water. It was not coming from the fish tank.
Firmly pushing away any upcoming inappropriate thoughts, Samantha walked over to the bathroom door and positioned herself right beside it.
"Siobhan?" She called.
"Come in!" Shepard's voice was muffled by the bathroom wall, but her words were very understandable to the dirty side of Samantha's brain.
Well, that's unexpected. Did I shave this morning? Shite. I think I didn't. Bad, Sam!
Half a minute later a slightly uncertain Samantha stepped into the shower beside Shepard. She was immediately pulled into an embrace, a wet kiss placed on her forehead. Leaning into the hug she softly kissed Shepard's neck in return. It felt silky yet strong and altogether very good.
"I was so worried about you," Shepard breathed, slowly stroking Samantha's back. Traynor's body responded with a rapidly growing fire stimulating certain areas.
"How bad was your head?"
Samantha stepped back to prevent her mind from overloading with desire. She wasn't an apt talker when her loins were screaming 'touch me'.
"It wasn't that bad, just a small wound. Dr. Chakwas patched it up with medigel. I had also wounded my hand, and my back and neck were very sore from slamming into the duct walls a few times."
Shepard stroked a strand of wet hair sticking to Samantha's cheek. She was looking at her with glazed eyes, as if some mystical being had sauntered into her shower to lazily make itself comfortable, undisturbed by the effect it had on the observer. She leaned into Samantha again, her mouth inches away from the other's ear.
"Can you forgive me?" She whispered.
Samantha sighed. No forgiveness was necessary. The only thing she wanted was for Shepard to take a leap into uncertainty with her. But out of love, not fear. And Sam would do the same. She'd leave her fear of a possible repetition of what happened with Charlotte behind. Give Siobhan a chance. Give them a chance. They owed it to each other to try. At least, in Samantha's mind they did.
"There's nothing to forgive. I...I was so scared you'd die on me down there before I got the chance to tell you that...that, um...I want to be with you. I want us to give us a shot. You...are important to me, Siobhan."
Samantha's breath stopped as wet lips pressed on hers, pulling her into a deep, intense kiss. Shepard was hungry, drawing Samantha deeper and deeper into a pleasurable nothingness. For a while that was all that existed. Just them and the kiss. Sam felt lightheaded but oh so good at the same time. Her hands explored Shepard's curves, discovering them all over again under the steady trickle of hot water. She was rewarded with the Commander's hands gripping her body, stroking her jawline, her neck, her arms, her back, her belly, her breasts, her taut nipples…
Samantha broke the kiss out of necessity as she gasped for air. Shepard looked at her, eyes wide with anxiety. Before Shepard could open her mouth to ask what was wrong, Samantha flashed her a weak smile.
"Could we continue this in the bedroom? Myyyy…asthma prevents me from breathing properly whenever I attempt to have sex in the shower. It's got something to do with trying to breathe rapidly while inhaling insane amounts of steam. They don't mix well in my lungs."
Shepard couldn't help but laugh at the revelation. She put her hand in front of her mouth, slightly embarrassed at her outburst. Putting on a serious face, she looked at Samantha earnestly. "I didn't know you had asthma."
"Oooh, there's a lot you still don't know about me, Commander…" Samantha said as she shot Shepard a playful wink. "But please, let's get to know me better in bed. Where I can breathe properly. Aaaand… other things."
[Normandy SR-2 - Captain's Cabin]
Shepard held Samantha firmly in her arms, one of her hands nestled between Sam's breasts. Warmth and a sense of impending sleep enveloped them. Shepard nudged Samantha's now nearly dry hair with her nose, taking in the other's scent, reveling in it. Samantha smelled amazingly good.
"You know what?" She queried to see if Samantha was still awake.
"Hmmm?" Came the groggy response.
"I got so upset when you were hurt because whenever I'm planet-side doing a mission, it is the thought of you safe that keeps me going. I was more angry with myself than with you for getting you hurt anyway. I felt like I had failed you."
Samantha let the words sink in before answering.
"And I was, in my own geeky way, trying to look out for you, Siobhan. I realized I—" She was cut short by a yawn. "I can't let you slip away when you're so close. I wouldn't have been able to live with myself had you died on Rannoch before I had had the chance to tell you that." She yawned again.
Shepard smiled into Sam's hair. "You deserve to be loved deeply, Samantha, and then some more. What are you doing with a scarred rot like me who could die in a firefight any day?"
Traynor turned around in Shepard's arms. She was met with eyes intently watching her. Even though Shepard had said it lightly, as if joking, the warmth in her eyes was mixed with a subtle undercurrent of fear. She placed her hands on Shepard's face and cupped it.
"Stop flattering me at your own expense, Siobhan. You know you deserve the same," Traynor softly spoke.
Shepard's eyes lit up as a smile tugged at the corners of her lips. She leaned in to give Sam a tender kiss. The gesture was returned promptly but delicately.
"I love you, Samantha."
Traynor beamed. She kissed Shepard again and snuggled in her arms, wrapping her own around the body she now cautiously called her girlfriend's. Who knew, maybe they would make it. They would at least try, very, very hard.
"I love you, Siobhan."
Shepard firmly took hold of Samantha's warm, soft body. A deep sleep rounded the corners of their consciousness and, before they knew it, they were peacefully asleep in each other's arms. No nightmare returned to plague Shepard that night.
Check, mate.
A/N: That's it. The end. I felt it was better to end it here than to drag it out and lose the original intention I had for this story. I want to thank all of you who took the time to read, review, follow, and even favorite this story. I don't mean to sound cheesy but it is all of you that kept me writing until this tale was complete. It is so awesome to see your support in the numerous favs and follows. So thank you. I specifically want to thank my betas who helped me immensely to get through my first attempt at writing fanfic: ShadowBlazer, elmjuniper, Cheesesack, and DoomKitteh. And all of you with whom I traded PMs at some point or other.
I am working on a new story but its details are still very busy forming themselves inside my brain. I have so many ideas, but they don't all work together very well. And being a libra I need to take my sweet time making decisions. They are HARD! Feel free to check back from time to time though to see whether my muse has been kind to me. Maybe that will make her hurry up and get on with it already. ;-)