Greetings...

Songs for this chapter are: Panic Switch by Silversun Pickups and Karma Payment Plan by Modest Mouse.

SO, since we left off....Lawward was stuck in a ladies bathroom stall. I think it's time we let him out.

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

I Hate You, Kiss Me

"Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with, that it's compounding a felony." – Robert Benchley

"There is no calamity greater than lavish desires.

There is no greater guilt than discontentment.

And there is no greater disaster than greed" – Lao-Tzu, Chinese philosopher.

Chapter Fourteen

I admit I was walking rather briskly and it was not entirely due to the chilly air. Jasper could've easily kept up with me, but he continued to wait for Alice so they both lagged a few steps behind with confused, quiet glances. I pretended to be cold and rubbed my arms for the added warmth. The gesture was actually to reassure myself. I didn't feel completely okay with the way Edward and I parted.

I had panicked. Simple as that.

Women had been about to bombard the bathroom, I could hardly have him casually walk out the door with myself right behind him. Neither of us would live it down at the office. I suppose we could have gotten some slack since it's that holiday time of year, but I didn't want everyone knowing. It was private. People whispering and gossiping would add too much pressure to whatever was between us. If things didn't work out, I would have to look for another job. These were legitimate concerns of mine.

As I pulled the door to the bar open, the warm air rushed against the three of us in welcome. We snagged a table to peel our coats off and order drinks. After combing the room twice, I spotted Emmett sitting at the bar. He was off to the side and for once, not blatantly hitting on a fresh young thing.

"I'll be right back," I told Alice and Jasper over the music and chatter.

They nodded and Alice raised her eyebrow at me with one of those I-know-you've-been-up-to-something looks.

"Hey stranger," I greeted Emmett and took the stool next to him.

"Well look who decides to show up." Emmett grinned at me and took a deep swig of his beer.

I ordered my gin and tonic from the bartender. "I should say the same to you," I challenged with narrowed eyes.

Emmett turned sheepish and took another long gulp. He wasn't going to get off that easily so I waited for him to finish his long drawn out beer chugging. He caught my eye and set his bottle down, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

"And where's the lovely lady tonight?" I hedged.

"So you saw that earlier huh?"

I nodded slightly, feeling my cheeks grow warm and gladly accepted my drink from the bartender as an excuse to turn my face away. I didn't know why I felt embarrassed, we used to talk about our flings and wild nights frequently.

Emmett spoke, pretending not to notice my sudden discomfort. "Rose had to stay behind and make sure the company tab was closed and everything squared away." He glanced at the door, looking a bit forlorn by her absence.

I rolled my eyes. "Why didn't you join the party more?"

He shrugged. "I was up for it and Rose agreed, but I could tell she was feeling uncomfortable about it."

My brows furrowed at that. "Why? I can understand around the office, but this was a huge party."

Emmett smiled at me like I was a mentally challenged child. "We've just barely come up for air and I haven't exactly introduced myself to her father yet and with the party—"

"She doesn't want to be seen with you in public?"

"That's not it."

"One of your past lovers is suing you for abandonment and Mr. Lawrence is the lawyer?!"

"Just chill! Don't get me started on that imagination of yours. You're not going to analyze anything this time." He breathed out in exasperation and smiled at me before swigging the last of his beer. I watched him, silently. "Haven't you ever wanted to keep something a secret, even though you're not ashamed? Just because?"

Yeah, I did. I certainly wasn't ashamed of my chemistry with Edward, but I wasn't about to jeopardize our working environment with public displays of…anything. "Well if we're talking about trying to keep things private, you and Rose haven't exactly been in hiding."

"Not my fault you keep catching us." He smirked and ordered another beer.

I snorted into my drink before sipping.

Emmett sighed heavily again and rubbed the back of his head. "Nah, you're right."

"I know I'm right." I smiled cheekily though I didn't feel any satisfaction.

It was his turn to snort. "Arrogant lawyer," he muttered. "I've been a real ass lately haven't I?" He smiled grimly and began peeling the label off his beer bottle just for something to do.

I nodded, feeling morose by the serious tone our conversation was taking.

He turned to me, looking like a sad dog. "I'm really sorry, Bells."

"It's fine."

"No, it's not fine." His hand that rested next to his beer curled into a fist. "You've always been a really strong person and I guess I just got used to that. But I know you've been having a hard time lately and I've been MIA a lot. That night with James -- who by the way hasn't shown his face at the gym since…" Emmett cracked his knuckles for good measure. "And then the day you attacked me in Rose's office, we haven't really hung out until now. It's been a crazy month of December."

I really didn't know what to say at first. I admitted to myself that I had also been busy by a certain someone. But I felt bad that Emmett had felt guilty and laid my hand on his fist. "Em, thank you. It's nice to have you back. I've missed you but I'm okay. I guess I've been preoccupied too." His fist relaxed under my hand and I retracted it back to my cocktail.

"Preoccupied?"

"Err…yeah, you know work stuff. Mr. Cullen's been giving me lots of projects at the office," I answered mildly.

"Right, preoccupied," he repeated with a leering smile. "You mind telling me what happened between you two that night at the museum?"

I shifted in my seat. That night had been a source of pain and discomfort for me.

"I know I know, you and me just leave things alone when we don't want to tell. But I know something is up." His wiggling eyebrows clashed with his serious expression.

I tried not to laugh at that. "What do you mean?"

"Well I almost gave him a punch or two for letting you walk home by yourself and with James still roaming the streets..."

"Oh my gosh, Emmett—"

"I didn't. I said almost."

"What did he say?" I was dying to know what Edward might have said to Emmett about me.

He shrugged unnaturally. "Just that you were upset and wanted to be by yourself. He said he tried following you but you ran away. Of course, I didn't believe him until Alice convinced him to stop wandering and go home."

That certainly coincided with what Alice had relayed to me. He continued with, "Besides, it's all in what he didn't say."

"What do you mean?"

"By the way he was acting, I would say the guy has a big thing for you…"

I choked on my drink and began coughing, my face flaming.

Emmett ignored my sputters, looking real thoughtful for a moment. He's never been a 'dumb as a rock' football player or a skeezy frat boy. He's always known what he is - a man that loves to be with women. He doesn't treat them badly other than skip out on them and he makes no pretenses about it either. But I get nervous when Emmett starts to seriously ponder things.

"You two were acting very cozy that night we went to Jupiter," he recalled, pointing his sausage finger at me. "Strange, but cozy." He raised one of his thick eyebrows at me in question. "What's been going on between you two?"

Great. All of a sudden Emmett decides to gives a shit and put some pieces together. "Since when did you become detective?" I asked, putting my glass down.

"Please, I know how to read people."

"You know how to read flirtatious women," I countered with a laugh.

"My point exactly."

"It was not flirting. We've never really gotten along."

"Well if you want him off your case - no pun intended - just bag him." He rolled his eyes at my confused expression. "Ya know, fuck him. Clean his pipes out. He'll get what he's been missing and move on."

"That won't work," I said confidently and then immediately regretted it.

"Why not? It worked for me. Works for most guys."

"It just won't."

He hunched forward to look at me more closely. "There's something else you're not telling me Miss Bells."

I was just never going to get out of this. "Okay Emmett, you win," I said in a sing-song tone. "Remember that night you made a girl purr like a kitten?" He nodded with a foolish grin. "That night…I had been with Edward. We met at Monty's. But I didn't know he'd be working with me at the time."

Shock was written across Emmett's face and he just stopped everything he was doing. I was frozen too, waiting impatiently, unsure what he was thinking now.

He suddenly boomed a roaring laugh, making my hair fly around my face wildly. He slammed his fist on the bar causing our drinks to shake on the table's surface. He laughed past the ability to breathe, ending on a rich throaty chuckle.

I looked around, wondering if people nearby were staring at us.

"Jeez Bella," he gasped, red-faced and eyes bulging. "That's so fucking hilarious. I have a girl for a night and I never want to see her again but you've had to work with him everyday." He laughed wickedly again, pounding his own chest.

"Yeah, it's been candy in the sky," I deadpanned humorlessly.

Emmett gulped down his beer through more chuckles. I took a large sip of my gin and tonic for good measure. "And now he likes you. What a nightmare."

"You're really not helping, Emmett." I was getting annoyed with him now.

"You want me to get Rose to fire him?" he asked eagerly with an amused glint in his eyes, testing me.

"Stop using your girlfriend like that. And no, that's not necessary."

"Are you sure?"

I sighed. "Given your new track record on secrecy, I'd appreciate you not sharing any of this with my boss," I requested through my teeth. With anything work-related, I had to refer to Rose as 'my boss' rather than 'his girlfriend'.

He conceded by casually shrugging it off.

I resumed drinking, trying to salvage my dignity while Emmett continued to snicker at the whole business.

"He's not all that terrible. He brings me coffee." I tried playing it off with humor. I didn't want Emmett to go all Papa Bear on me.

"I guess that redeems him. But if he starts groping…" The betraying heat trickled up my cheeks. "Kidding Bella." He barked a laugh with a shake of his head and guzzled his beer.

His phone buzzed loudly in his pocket and we both looked down at it.

He answered it with a, "Hey Babe," and began talking in lower tones. I turned away politely and sipped my drink. After a minute he snapped the phone shut and forced it back into the pocket of his jeans.

"Well, looks like my lovely lady is finally free." His smile turned down at the corners. "I hope you don't think I'm being an ass, leaving you here," he said as he started to get up and put on his coat.

I rolled my eyes. "If I cared at all about being ditched we would never have lasted as friends. Besides, you're always an ass. At least it's not to the entire female population anymore."

He laughed and put his paw around me, squeezing my shoulders in a hug. "Love ya Bells, you've always been awesome." He chugged down the last of his beer. "Dinner after New Years?"

"You bet," I agreed. "Now go to your lady."

"And quite a lady she is. She's a tiger in the bed—"

"I don't want to know," I interrupted curtly.

He laughed again and left the bar.

I sighed and stared at the door for a few moments. There goes Emmett on his happy way. The door swung several times till it was about to close completely, but was flung open at the last second by the devil himself with bronze hair.

My initial reaction was to duck my head out of sight but I caught myself, growing more annoyed from that natural impulse. Bella Swan does not shy away from anyone, especially a man. Plus, we still needed to work things out. At this point it wasn't simply avoiding an encounter at the grocery story, we had…well, we had done some kissing.

I ordered a second drink and caught his eye.

My brain started to scramble up, I didn't know what or which to say first. We had said some pretty horrible things to each other in the heat of the moment. Somehow that had ended with an incredible sexually physical situation. Would we be going back to our dry banter or continue…well, kissing? My hands were already starting to fidget with unease and excitement. I warred internally with securing my job, protecting my heart, and being inexplicably drawn to him.

Just seeing his mouth reminded me of how he had kissed my hand and ravaged my lips. Fuck, I already felt like a sinking ship as he started closing the distance between us.

I did a head to toe inspection of him as he walked over. He looked very presentable with his hair in that state of carefully crafted messy, his shirt smooth and buttoned nicely under his coat, no problem in the pants anymore, and…I choked back a laugh into my new gin and tonic.

He had a scrap of toilet paper on his shoe.

He took Emmett's seat, pulled his coat off, and was about to greet me when I stomped on his toe.

"Ow!"

"Damn it I missed," I muttered. "Hold still."

"What? No!" He stood, but was blocked in between his stool and myself. "Bella, you're crazy. Would you stop doing that?!"

I stood too and placed my hands on his shoulders to stop him from wiggling away. He looked confused again as I brought my face close to his. "You have toilet paper on your shoe."

"Oh." His jaw tightened and his ears pinked with embarrassment at his belated realization.

Once he held still, I firmly planted my toe onto the paper and ripped it away from his shoe.

"Thanks," he said quietly, his deep voice sounding right above my head.

As soon as I felt his hands slide up my arms in a gentle light touch, I sat back down on my stool. It made my body a shiver and it wasn't at all unpleasant.

He copied me, resuming his seat and ordered a gin and tonic too. It reminded me of the first time we'd spoken at Monty's. I watched his throat muscles and Adam's apple move up and down as he drank from his glass. He never sipped from the straw.

I squirmed a little in my seat and tried to concentrate on my own drink.

"So, about earlier in the restroom…" he began without beating around the bush.

"Yes, how did you manage to escape?"

"Actually I was referring to before that." He leaned closer to me. "You've been very bad tonight Ms. Swan," he said in a low voice and brushed his hand along the top of my leg.

"Stop it," I hissed. I could already feel heat between my legs. What was this man doing to me?

"You were pretty eager earlier, even you are not that good of a liar." His fingers trailed further up my thigh.

I swallowed loudly. "Or you're easily fooled."

His eyes flew to my face. "Not likely."

I scowled but didn't inch away anymore. "I would throw my gin at you if I didn't want to drink it so badly."

"Do you want to know why you're angry?"

I didn't answer him. He'd only been here for five minutes and was already getting me worked up. I was having a difficult time forming words with his hand trailing up my leg.

"I'll tell you why," he continued quietly in his silken voice. "You're not mad that I'm touching you, you're mad that you keep responding to me."

I blew out a breath I hadn't realized I was holding and I shut my eyes for a moment, trying to regain my composure. When I felt his hand stop moving, I opened my eyes to focus on him. "And what about you? Nothing I do makes you mad."

His hand fell away. "Not true, I get angry enough. It doesn't mean I don't enjoy it." He smirked.

I was a little unnerved. I had been truly furious before and I thought he had been too. To him, my anger meant I was enjoying his attentions. How messed up was that? I wasn't sure what fazed him anymore. No matter what I did, he was enjoying himself. I began to overanalyze his real motives for bringing Tanya. Had he done it to get another rise out of me? That didn't seem to fit well with his behavior in his office earlier.

"Tell me, where is Tanya?" I asked, genuinely curious.

Edward took another deep swill from his glass. "I said goodnight to her."

"That's all? She didn't put up a fuss? Lure you back to her place?" I admit I was fishing for more information.

He turned to me in annoyance. "Yes, she found me in the bathroom, joined me in my stall, and we had a quick bunny fuck before I came here. I'm going to have my way with you next and then meet up with her later for round two. Is that what you expected?"

I peered at him in surprise. I'd seen sarcasm undoubtedly, arrogance, frustration, but never had I seen him show such weary bitterness before.

"I didn't add her to my Christmas bonus," he continued with faint amusement. "I found her in the lobby and yes, she offered. I politely refused and apologized for disappearing on her. She was disappointed of course, but we parted our separate ways to which she promptly broke the heel of her shoe and fell into another man's arms."

"I guess everybody wins," I commented mildly.

"Yes," he agreed as the corner of his mouth twitched. "I only hope she doesn't complain of my rude behavior to Mr. Lawrence." He gulped down the last of his drink.

It seemed that Edward was finished arguing for the night and my fury had also dissipated from earlier. Our fight had definitely been ridiculously out of control. It had escalated from Tanya to criticizing each other's character. Were we so different?

"You're drinking awfully fast tonight," I observed, watching his neck muscles gloriously contract as he swallowed.

"Too late to get it out of my system now," he sighed, quirking his brow at me.

I suddenly thought about what Emmett had said.

"Ya know, fuck him. Clean his pipes out. He'll know what he's been missing and move on."

And just like that, the light bulb in my head turned on. I had gone down the wrong path, using James to distract myself from Edward. What I needed to do was sleep with Edward again, and get him out of my system. I was sure a lot of the sexual tension came from not remembering our one-night stand very well. If we re-created it—with myself being much less inebriated—I could try to move on. I could play it off as a second one-night stand, if there was such a thing. The Achilles heel of this plan was the surmounting fact that my attraction grew for him everyday. Would I be able to stop myself after this? I also knew that for this to have a chance at working I had to get him drunk, otherwise he would put the pressures of a relationship on me. I'd never been in this predicament before so I had to tread carefully.

"I'll get the next round of drinks," I cut in before Edward could wave for the bartender. I slapped my money down, hollered at the bar and ordered more gin and tonics. I also ordered an extra shot for Edward.

He raised his eyebrows at me.

"What? I can be nice." I pretended to pout.

"What's the occasion?" he asked suspiciously.

"I don't need an occasion to be nice. But it is that holiday time of year too," I answered innocently like it was obvious.

He still wasn't entirely convinced but accepted his fresh glass.

"You did abandon me in the restroom..." he reminded.

"Well, I could hardly let you march out behind me in front of all those women," I countered.

"I now know the ladies room should be completely off limits to men. I've heard things in there I never want to hear again. Women are extremely vicious when they gossip," he pronounced with a look of disgust.

"Well I warned you didn't I?"

"You did."

I raised my drink to his in a toast. "Consider it made up." I clanked his glass with mine and drank eagerly.

He didn't drink as readily as me but more slowly, watching me from above the rim. I knew that look, he was trying to read me. I gave him a friendly smile in return. I wasn't going to let him put me up on his platform for further study.

So we drank. We bickered here and there too.

I kept ordering Edward gin and tonics and surprisingly, he went along with it. Perhaps he thought he would be able to figure it all out if he played along. Eventually he picked up my glass and shook it side to side. "You're letting your ice melt."

I giggled nervously and sipped my watered down beverage through the straw. I was currently three drinks behind Edward and tried to keep it that way. I was getting worried, though. He didn't look that intoxicated after six and my cash was dwindling.

He stood suddenly, and to my delight, swayed on his feet. I also stood and placed my hands on his arms to steady him. He leaned into me and smiled. "Thank you, Bella," he said softly into my ear.

Having a few drinks since the Christmas party, I couldn't help myself. I rubbed my hands up his shoulders playfully. "Where are you going?"

"The restroom." He leaned down and nipped my ear between his lips. I gasped and shivered against him. He chuckled quietly and said, "Not the ladies room." His pelvis slid along mine as he maneuvered himself out between the stools.

My knees felt weak so I sat down and thought of putting my perspired glass to my cheek to try and cool down.

"Well hello there," an early bird chirped.

"Hi Alice," I replied as she took Edward's seat. I did a double-take at her. "Alice?! What are you still doing here?" My eyes darted around for Jasper.

"Watching you two of course. I only wish I'd brought popcorn."

I groaned. "And what is your review on the show?"

"Two thumbs up. I'm wondering why you haven't taken him home yet," she admonished. "Don't you want a riveting performance?"

"I'm working on it," I said tiredly. I was in fact, exhausted.

"Really?" Alice asked with genuine surprise on her pretty face.

"Does that surprise you?"

"It shouldn't. Did anything happen with you two earlier?" She eyed me with a grin.

"Maybe."

"Let me guess, Mr. Cullen in the ladies room with a wrench."

"If by 'wrench' you mean me, then yes."

"The toilet paper on his shoe was some hard evidence. You're terrible at covering your tracks."

"Apparently," I sighed. "Thanks for going along with it anyway."

"How was it?" She smiled wide like a Cheshire cat, exposing all of her little chicklet-shaped teeth.

I looked down at my empty glass trying to think how to phrase and evade.

"My my, Bella Swan, look at you blushing becomingly."

"I never used to blush," I grumbled and put the cold glass to my cheek.

"I've noticed. So tell," she demanded excitedly.

I put the glass down but continued to stare at it. "We…might have done some kissing."

Alice pumped her fist like my personal cheerleader. "Oh I bet it was good. Well I can see that it was," she said, observing me more thoroughly. "You poor damsel, getting all hot and bothered since he came into the picture."

I made no comment. I was pretty sure she was tipsy enough for the both of us.

Startling us, Edward loomed up behind me with Jasper. "Hey Alice."

"Hi Edward," she greeted while casting glances between the two of us.

"I think it's time we left these two and headed home. What do ya say?" Jasper directed at his girlfriend with another meaningful look.

Thanks for being obvious guys.

Alice hopped off the stool and gave me a goodbye hug. They grabbed their coats and hurried out the door with idiotic smiles and more meaningful looks.

Edward turned to me with his lips curling at the corners. "Shall we follow their example?"

Though he swayed a little, he was still much too coherent. I ran my hand up the side of his leg, enjoying the feel of his muscle beneath his charcoal-colored slacks. "One more drink?"

His smile broadened and he conceded by gracefully falling back onto his stool. "One more."

Of course one more became two more and two more became three more.

I was still three drinks behind him but with the amount of cocktails we ordered, it didn't matter anymore. We were both intoxicated by alcohol and with each other. I was still trying my best to stay afloat but we kept giggling and snickering at anything and everything. Our interactions had also become more playful throughout the night. It started out with casual knee bumping as we inched closer together on our stools. Now our legs were woven, his knee between mine. I vaguely noticed myself touching his arm here and there while enjoying his fingers brushing circles on my leg.

This was it, I was going to take him home.

I didn't even want to think about how much I'd spent just to get to this point and hurriedly paid off the last of our bill. With our legs still laced together, I tried standing up by leaning a hand on the bar to steady myself.

In one swift movement Edward wrapped his arms around my waist and brought us both upright as he stood. He squeezed the breath out of me, pressing me to him with our legs still partially tangled. His arms were an unwavering vice, my limbs dangled and fought for surface in a very undignified fashion. And then I felt something grow hard against my hip.

I let out a squeak and he laughed quietly at my ear. A shiver ran up my spine as I breathed excitedly. His wonderful hair tickled my cheek as he placed a burning kiss on my neck just below the corner of my jaw. Goosebumps instantly spread along my skin, causing my nipples to perk up against his chest.

"I think it's time to go now," I forced out.

His heated lips dragged to the spot behind my ear and he kissed again. My head started to roll back as my body went limp in his arms.

"Edward…I…"

He hummed questioningly from my neck.

"I can't breathe," I said in a strangled voice.

He loosened his grip, letting my body slide down the length of him till my feet came into contact with the floor again. He wasn't smirking like I had been expecting him to. His lids were heavy and his face was drawn serious with parted lips. He stared at me like he was caught in a spell of some sort. I smiled nervously, unsure of what he was thinking or if he was thinking at all. To my relief his mood broke when he smiled back.

Though I wasn't completely coherent, I knew Edward was quite drunk. We fumbled with our coats and clumsily stepped away from our stools to make our way outside.

The air was chilly, bringing with it a new wave of excitement. It burst our quiet giggling bubble of drinking and touching. Edward put his arm around me lazily as we walked in a zigzagging fashion down the street. I leaned into him, grateful for the warmth.

"Cold?" he spoke into my shoulder. I nodded and bundled closer, causing us to trip over each other. "You need to get your blood moving." Though he spoke slowly, slurring his consonants, his tone was thick with sexual implications.

I breathed a thrill of excitement, my breath fogging the wintry air." Like this?" I teased, breaking away from his hold and started skipping down the sidewalk.

He skipped along side me with a tipsy smirk. "Sure."

As we laughed and skipped, he closed the gap between us and snaked an arm around me again. Our legs moved at the same galloping rhythm for a while before I noticed Edward's hand moving up my side.

When I turned to look at him, his eyes were dark and heavy, his lips spread in a small smile. He caught my glance and grabbed me, pulling us around the side of a building.

"I can think of other ways to get your blood moving," he mumbled, cradling me in his arms against the brick wall.

With the heat of his body pressed to mine and speaking to me in his husky voice, he was irresistible. He always was. We were still riled up from earlier and the alcohol freed our previous restraints. We had gotten a taste of something really good in the ladies room and it was clear neither of us were ready to let go. He had been correct. I couldn't help the way my body responded to him. I knew my mind was undisciplined at the moment as my body gave in to him willingly and without hesitation.

My fingers ran through his hair starting at the nape of his neck, trailing up the sides of his head, enjoying the feel of the thick, soft strands. I pulled him to me and we kissed soft and deep. I moaned as our lips angled for a deeper kiss, fervently moving against each other. The burning heat and softness of his mouth overwhelmed me.

I curled my fingers in his hair and Edward breathed in sharply. As his mouth opened I slid my tongue in and slowly brushed it along his. He tasted of gin and limes and a faint flavor of peppermint from earlier. He groaned from deep within his throat as our kiss grew slow and heavy.

We heard a large group of people coming down the street, loud, laughing, and drunk. We were startled out of our make-out session by their ruckus.

Edward grinned crookedly and put a finger to my lips to keep me quiet. Meanwhile, his other hand began clumsily unzipping my coat. He chuckled at my surprised face before slipping a hand inside, groping and rubbing along the side of my dress. What a bastard.

Trying to keep us quiet and arousing me at the same time just wasn't fair. I was always up for his challenges and in a more coherent mindset to win. I pulled his finger that rested on my lips into my mouth and sucked. His glazed eyes became mesmerized by the action so I swirled my tongue around his finger. He whined softly with pleasure and swayed closer with his other hand gliding up to my satin covered breast. My hands roamed over his chest and settled on his waistband to bring him even closer.

The crowd stumbled near us in a rush with their chatter and noise. We were hidden behind the wall of the building but that didn't mean they wouldn't be able to hear us when they got close enough. It seemed Edward had come to the same conclusion. Just as they were passing he squeezed my breast while my hand flew to his hard bulge and rubbed down on it.

I don't know what had gotten into us but we both moaned a long heavy sigh. The crowd quieted after they passed us and then roared in laughter.

Edward's finger slipped out of my mouth and he cradled my cheek in his palm.

"Does this get your blood flowing too?" I asked in a ragged whisper and an idiotic smile.

His forehead fell to mine. "You're going to pay for that Ms. Swan," he slurred, his breath blowing across my lips.

I laughed and released him. "You're going to have to catch me first," I said excitedly and moved away from him again.

I giggled more as I skipped away, feeling the cold air rush on my face. The alcohol and hormones left me in a dizzying and lustful state. Come on Edward, follow me to my apartment!

He jogged after me awkwardly, trying to flatten his stiffy with a hand.

I zipped my coat up to my neck as I continued galloping down the sidewalk. "Come on Mr. Cullen! Don't you want a Merry Christmas?!" I called over my shoulder playfully as I crossed the empty street.

I looked back when I heard his jogging footsteps. He was catching up to me so my initial reaction was to outrun him. The faster we got to my apartment, the sooner we could continue this. He called after me and I screamed and ran faster which was an amazing feat in heels.

Suddenly, I felt a hand snake around my waist. "Gotcha," he said in a low voice and chuckled into my ear from behind.

I shrieked as he turned me into his arms. His eyes were barely opened and he grinned at me goofily. "You know what I love about you? You're silly."

"You know what I love about you?" I giggled, leaning into him.

He smirked lazily. "What?"

"Your dancing." We both snorted into our laughter.

He took both my hands in his and laced them tightly. "Then dance with me!" He spun us in a circle with our arms spread out, using our pulled weight for leverage. All the while we laughed hysterically.

Flakes of snow fell from the sky. I could see past Edward's head that snow peppered the ground like it had been falling for at least a half-hour. I refocused on Edward, who was still laughing and smiling. I'd never seen his face this carefree before. The snowflakes landed in his hair and he looked so glazed and happy, I didn't have the heart to stop spinning. Then he started glowing with this blinding light like a beautiful archangel. I gasped through my laughter.

"You're glowing!" he yelled to me.

"No you're glowing!" I yelled back, confused and happy.

"Excuse me," a deep voice cut in beside us.

As Edward and I went round and round I saw a new face popping up in my line of vision. I slowed to a stop, catching my breath and Edward leaned into my shoulder with his fit of chuckles.

I was not in fact seeing Edward glow. Behind him was a police car parked, the headlights shining in our direction. The red lights atop the vehicle were also blinking and blaring at us.

"They need to turn up the music," Edward mumbled as he grabbed me by the arms and waist. He started grinding into me and dancing to the lights thinking we'd hit another club.

The cop cleared his throat. "Uh Marty, a little help here." To further my mortification, another policeman opened the passenger door and stepped out of the vehicle to approach us.

I was slowly coming off my happy high but I still couldn't think straight. I tried disentangling myself from Edward who was becoming increasingly touchy in front of Officer No Name and his partner Marty.

"This is a public disturbance. You're loud, holding up traffic, not to mention a car could hit you. You mind telling me what you two are doing in the middle of the street?" Officer No Name asked, shining a flashlight in our faces.

"Just…we…I…"

"I'm going to get a Merry Christmas!" Edward cut in and gave my ass a squeeze.

I couldn't help laughing through my embarrassment.

"Let's get out of here, they won't play music," Edward mumbled again into my neck and licked, trailing his wet tongue up to my ear.

I caught the disapproving eye of the officers, who had come much closer to us.

"They don't even know where they are. Pick 'em up," he ordered gruffly.

Marty nodded and they both unhooked Edward and I from each other. I felt very annoyed with the universe. All I'd been trying to do tonight was have drunken sex for all the wrong reasons. Officer No Name put his large, hairy, and meaty hands on my shoulders in restraint. I was subject to caprices but very tipsy so my attempts to shrug him off were feeble as he clicked a pair of handcuffs on me.

"Hey there Mr. Officer," I greeted with a coy smile through my heavy eyelids. "Isn't this all a little unnecessary?"

"It's Officer Stevenson to you. And no need to try any of that on me," he reprimanded.

Edward did not resist arrest but merely smiled in a bewildered state while he tried not to pass out on his feet. We were ushered to their vehicle with our rights read and our heads protected as we were forced in backwards.

The officers resumed their front seats and drove leisurely back to their precinct. Other then the front radio going off in the background, it was silent and uncomfortable. I leaned my head back against the seat, trying to shake off the alcohol clouding my brain. Noises of Edward fidgeting caught my slowed attention span.

He slouched against the seat with a tired grin and kept clawing at his back pocket. "Mercer and 5th please," he said, completely befuddled.

"Edward, this isn't a taxi," I muttered in annoyance.

Marty guffawed from the passenger seat.

As the car made a sharp turn, Edward fell against me and started whispering unintelligible words into my shoulder. I tried pushing him off but it was impossible with my hands behind my back. Officer Stevenson glared at us every few moments in the rear view mirror, probably making sure we weren't up to any shenanigans. I peered down at Edward resting on me. His eyes were closed and his lips still moved in silent words that I couldn't understand. I sighed. I didn't have the heart to move away from him and rested my head atop his wild strands.

Upon arrival, we were ushered out of the police car. Officer Stevenson was stronger and burly so he carried Edward's passed out form inside, asking him to "pick up yer feet". Marty was quiet and polite, giving me apologetic prods into the jail cell.

Once I saw those bars lock us in, a new wave of mortification washed over me that no amount of handcuff releasing could assuage. "This is outrageous," I protested to Officer Stevenson.

"A public disturbance of noise and misbehavior is punishable. You two may have been harmless in yer intentions but the action is not exempted."

"Why can't you just drive us home with a warning instead?" I asked indignantly.

He smiled grimly at me from the other side. "Miss Swan, judgin' from yer records yer clean and yer job evokes a commendable service to the people and state, but I can't make exceptions under the law. Somethin' you should understand."

"Fine. But I get my phone call."

He sighed and crossed his hairy arms over his chest. "You sure do. I'd suggest waitin' till morning when everyone's awake or you'll waste it." As I was about to argue, his voice rose with angry impatience. "I'm not going to penalize you with a fine, consider that yer warning. Jus' cool off and sober up for the night. You'll get yer phone call."

He marched away, shaking his head. Now that he'd yelled at me and I was in this stupid predicament, tears threatened to spill. Officer Stupidson. I huffed and wiped a tear that escaped down my cheek. Thank God Chief Swan couldn't see me now. I could handle the humiliation but not the disappointment Charlie would feel if he knew.

Just breathe. It'll be okay.

I realized I'd completely forgotten about Edward. I turned around to see him lying on his back, passed out on the cot. His face was solemn and peaceful looking and he snored softly. Despite his uselessness, I was greatly comforted by his presence.

I tiptoed around the toilet seat in the cell and stumbled onto the cot. With a sad and desperate need, I lay down and kicked my heels off to curl up into Edward's side. I used his warmth for comfort and pulled his limp arm to wrap around me. With a tight throat I fought back more tears and succumbed to a dizzying sleep.

~/~/~/~

My cheek was stuck to Edward's shoulder and I fought the urge to move away from his warm body as the stiffness assaulted my limbs from an uncomfortable sleep. I lifted my heavy eyelids when I heard a pleasant whistling sound and rolled over. The cheap metal springs dug into my sides, adding pain to the stiffness. I sat up slowly and looked for the source.

I was struck dumb by the policeman sitting at his desk with his feet up, whistling behind his morning newspaper. And then it all hit me.

I cradled my head in my hands.

We weren't rowdy teenagers, escapees from an AA meeting, and there hadn't been a bachelor party.

What the hell had gotten into us last night?

Drinking, skipping, kissing, running, and dancing. In general, behaving ridiculous.

It was time for my damn phone call now.

I stood to regain what little dignity I had left and was prepared to march over to Officer Stupidson. I felt sick being in a room where Lawrence Associates sent the city criminals. I didn't get more than two steps before falling like a cripple on the cold cement floor, going down with a yelp. My stupid foot was still asleep and I winced at that prickly needles feeling as the extremity regained its flow of blood.

He put the morning paper aside to look at me as I growled with exasperation while wiggling my toes back to life.

It was not Stevenson. He stood up with a cheerful grin, his hair a sandy color and a large walrus mustache drooped over his lip. His tag read "Owen Murray" and the fifty-something year old officer observed me with amusement.

"Mornin'"

I regained my balance, slipped on my heels, and limped over to the bars. "Good Morning, I need my phone call. What time is it?" I asked with my hands on my hips, fighting a headache. I heard Edward stir behind me with tired grumbles.

"'Bout seven-thirty. I'll show you to the pay phone." He unlocked the cell and chaperoned me to the phone.

I dialed Alice's number with heavy butterflies in my stomach. I had no idea how to explain.

"Mmm…Hello?" she answered groggily.

"Alice, Hi," I started carefully.

"Bella? What the heck, it's too early to function," she said irritably.

"I know, I'm sorry. I need a favor…" I went on hesitantly. I heard her sitting up in bed, the blankets rustling in the background.

"What kind of favor? Are you okay?" she asked, more concerned and alert.

"Er…the best friend kind of favor. The bail me out of jail kind of favor."

"Okay, what is it?"

"No Alice, that's the favor. I'm at the police station with Edward. Can you come bail us out?" I clenched my teeth and winced, knowing what was to come.

"OH MY GOD YOU'RE IN JAIL?!" Her voice went shrill with disbelief.

I angled the phone away from my ear. I heard Jasper talking to her in the background now.

"It's not what you think!" I argued back about four inches from the receiver. To be honest I didn't know what Alice was thinking but I was sure her imagination conjured up anything worse than what had actually happened. The chatter stopped abruptly as the phone went dead. "Hello? Hello? Alice?" Nothing. I hung up with a mixture of relief and uneasy forebodings. Alice would never let me live this down.

Officer Murray accompanied me back to the cell and I went silently without complaint. Edward was still sleeping on the cot like a babe. I approached his form precariously debating on whether to wake him.

I looked at his sleeping face, tired and calm. His clothes were crumpled like mine but his hair was feathered out and mussed. His lips parted slightly as he inhaled and exhaled and signs of stubble lined his jaw. My fingers curled in my lap, aching to touch him.

I chewed on my bottom lip as I continued to gaze at him. The amused eyes, smirking mouth, and sarcastic words were gone. Seeing him like this, unknowingly vulnerable to me in his sleep brought on a strong wave of remorse.

I felt exceedingly disappointed in myself for how things turned out and since both of us had wanted another night together, I felt like I disappointed him too. I didn't like that at all.

I suddenly realized that there was a part of me that sought approval from Edward. If I truly didn't care, I would never have felt guilty about any of our mishaps. Yes, we teased and pranked, but beyond the heated arguments, sometimes we bickered companionably. No matter how many times he'd bothered me, I couldn't imagine not seeing him in the picture.

And yet, what if we had actually woken up together without the arrest? What then? Nice having sex with you, see ya at lunch? But we didn't have sex last night and the only thing I gave him was a terrible hangover.

I was afraid that whenever he did wake up and realize what happened last night, he'd feel misled and disappointed in me. His words from earlier surfaced in my mind.

"You don't believe a word I say do you? Instead of even trying, here you are running again."

My disastrous methods had only proved his point. I hadn't wanted to face his expectations and hid behind my 'brilliant plan' instead, always trying to get around the one issue that made us clash every time. And here we were, in a grimy jail cell.

Despite the reactions he brought forth from me, I was a responsible person and I cared about him. I wanted to apologize to him privately, in my own way, before he woke and I would have to answer to his calculating eyes.

I leaned closer to his face, staring at him intently, soaking up details. I hadn't realized how long his lashes were. They started reddish auburn at the roots which, turned to a deep brown fanning out at the tips. He was a beautiful man; there was no denying that. I pressed my lips to his, soft and gentle, feeling them mold to the shape of his. After a moment he kissed me back, dragging my lips into a small wave of his heat.

I broke away, feeling a little shaken by everything. I took a deep breath and looked back to his sleeping face. His lips were pulled up at the corners in a slight smile.

A door slammed, startling me from the sweet moment. Loud stalking footsteps bombarded the area. Alice.

Edward started waking, yawning, stretching, and mumbling unintelligibly. I stood and went to the steel bars anxiously, looking for her spiky black head. She met Officer Murray at the front counter, speaking to him in a quick trill. He searched her purse and led her through the gate that connected the main office with the cells.

"Oh my God, Bella! It's true, I can't believe you're actually here. I know some lawyers can be criminals but I think this is taking it too far!" She spoke a mile a minute in her black leather boots and long coat. She turned to Officer Murray. "Hurry it up, can't you see they've been stuck here all night?!" she demanded in exasperation.

"You got here fast. Did you fly a plane or something?"

"No I just sped through all the yellow lights—I mean…" She gave Officer Murray a cute smile. His walrus mustache twitched up pleasantly.

"Anyway, don't ask, it's been a long night. I need to go home." I jerked to the side, startled as Edward loomed up beside me.

"Morning Alice," he greeted with a tired smile while straightening his attire.

I didn't dare sneak more looks at him, this was embarrassing enough. I was afraid I would see disappointment grace his features. Nothing like this had ever happened to me before.

The cell door swung open, we signed release papers and were allowed to gather our things like cell phones and wallets. Alice put her arm around me, continuously fawning over my welfare. I let her.

When we finally got outside I saw Jasper sitting idly in the driver's seat, waiting for us to climb in and get settled.

"Hey there party animals," he joked gently.

I smiled weakly at him before turning my attention out the window. Alice kept glancing at me in her side mirror with reassuring looks.

"What happened last night?" Jasper prodded as he drove through downtown.

It went uncomfortably silent for a moment.

"I thought it was obvious, Jazz. Bella and I spent the night together," Edward replied smoothly.

I glanced at him and he winked at me. My eyes went wide.

"Oh?" Jasper asked, playing along.

"Ya see, Bella is a wild one so we needed a human sized cage."

I snorted a laugh into my hand before I could stop myself. Edward gave me a smug smile and I didn't mind at all. I was relieved that he smiled, period.

"And you still have the ability to walk?" Jasper asked in mock disbelief. "I don't know why you bothered calling us for a ride then. What were you doing, reading bedtime stories?"

"I know how to handle a feisty woman," Edward boasted, speaking about me like I wasn't there.

Alice laughed out loud and playfully put a hand on Jasper's knee. "Darling, I'm offended at your thoughtlessness."

"Alice, I apologize. You're the wildest of them all. I promise to do you the same consideration. What's your favorite bedtime story?" he laughed.

"That cell is certainly larger than your cubicle, Jasper," I teased.

The four of us laughed and snickered. It felt so good to laugh after a long, terrible night.

I noticed Edward frequently shifted in his seat during the drive. Aside from changing positions of leaning back or sitting upright, he looked like he didn't know what to do with his hands. His one hand would either lie in the middle seat between us or switch to resting on his knee with the occasional finger tapping. Whenever I chanced a glance at him I caught him staring at me. It wasn't a blank trance or perverted leering, just…I wasn't sure exactly but it was obvious he was thinking something. He would look away belatedly, more out of politeness than embarrassment. The whole thing was unnerving.

I was dropped off first, so I said my goodbyes and Alice hugged me and promised to call me later. Edward gave me a small polite smile which seemed a very normal thing to do but in light of well…everything, it only confused me more.

As soon as I entered my apartment I fell onto my soft bed face down with barely the energy to kick off my heels. I succumbed to deep sleep without another thought.

~/~/~/~

When I woke, the sun was setting and I pulled myself up to shower and nibble on toast. The warm water felt good on my skin but didn't wash away the humiliating memories of last night. The toast filled my stomach but I sat unseeing at the television, still hungry for answers. What was going through Edwards mind now?

I couldn't think about it anymore or it would drive me crazy. I needed to concentrate on packing my things. I was supposed to leave for Forks tomorrow to spend Christmas with Charlie.

By five fifteen in the morning, all the coffee mugs from my sink were clean and in the drying rack, the clutter on my desk neatly piled, coats and sweaters hung back in the closet, laundry folded, living room tidied and vacuumed, and my packed bag and purse laying on the floor beside my bed. At the end of the spick and span trail was me, curled into my bed to get a few hours of shuteye.

Hours later the sunlight peered through my blinds, waking me with a start. I glanced at my clock. Crap, it's nine-thirty! I was going to hit the holiday rush on the highway now. I rolled out of bed to get the day started, still cursing. I pulled on my clothes that had been laid out for the day, made coffee for my thermos, and gathered my things. As I went downstairs to load my car, I saw a small package sticking out of my mailbox.

I lifted the old fashioned latch to grab it and continued heading out the door. After slamming my stuff in the backseat, I eased into the driver's seat with my coffee, turning over the package with bewilderment. My full name and address were written but there was no return address. While sipping my coffee in one hand, I tore the sleeve of the padded envelope open.

A pair of furry pink handcuffs slid out of the pouch.

I sprayed my mouthful of coffee at the windshield and choked back the much needed oxygen. Surprise was an understatement. I dangled the pink fuzzy handcuffs between thumb and forefinger, eyeing it with suspicion and wonder.

There was a note in the pouch.

Bring these the next time you want to play.

-Mr. Cullen

I felt a quiver zip down into my gut and a blush creep up my cheeks uncontrollably. Several images flashed through my mind and I threw the cuffs into the glove compartment to stop the thoughts. He wasn't mad at me but God damn it, I was still caught off-guard. Edward was constantly surprising me.

Screw rush hour traffic. I bounded out of my car and up the stairs to my apartment. I rifled through my desk for my Polaroid camera with excitement. Aha! I rushed into my bedroom for ducky number six. I got a good angle and snapped a photo of the innocent looking rubber duck on my night table.

Yes Mr. Cullen, ducky number six lives. And you still can't have it.

I didn't add a note, I just stuffed it into an envelope and wrote his name on the back. It wouldn't hurt to take a detour by his apartment building on my way to Forks. The unique pointed skyscraper of his apartment building was all too familiar to me. I left the envelope with the doorman and finally started my trip home, smiling stupidly. He would most assuredly know it was from me.

More fun times to come....and if you're wondering exactly how Edward escaped the ladies room, more details about that will be in the next chapter.