Functional

Chapter 14: Ending

"Where's Ethan run off to Stan?"

"He was right next to me a minute ago."

Kyle pinched the bridge of his nose, a habit he had obtained from Stan, "We can't be late today Stan, it's his first day of school."

"I'll check his room," Stan held his hands up, "You finish getting Jake ready to go."

Stan ran up the stairs to Ethan's room and halted outside the door when he heard sniffling, he opened the door slowly and saw his son lying face down with his face in the pillow.

"Hey, Ethan," Stan said softly as he took a seat on the bed, "What's wrong, we need to go in a few minutes."

Ethan's voice was muffled, but Stan could clearly hear him shout, "I don't want to!"

Stan took hold of the boy beneath his armpits and lifted him up, pulling him into a hug, "Why not? You've been excited."

"I wanna stay at home with you and Jake."

Hearing this broke Stan's heart, he wanted Ethan to stay at home as well.

"I know," Stan sighed, "But you'll meet new friends at school."

"You're going to leave me and never come back."

"We'll pick you up and bring you home this afternoon," Stan explained, "Your Daddy and I both went through school when we were young."

"Really?"

"Everyone goes through school at some point," Stan nodded, "I did, Daddy did, Uncle Kenny did, Uncle Cartman did. Everyone did."

Ethan seemed to contemplate this.

"C'mon, let's go," Stan stood, Ethan followed behind him.

"What took you so long?" Kyle asked when they got downstairs.

"Ethan got scared."

Kyle smiled sympathetically, crouching down to the boy's level, "What's up bud?"

"Do you promise to come and get me later?" Ethan answered nervously.

"I'll still be at work, but Daddy will pick you up."

"Do you know who's teaching kindergarten?" Stan asked as they stood with the crowd of parents seeing their children into the school for their first day.

"Not a clue," Kyle replied with shrug.

The classroom had a door straight to the schoolyard and the teacher emerged from inside, Stan's jaw dropped and Kyle's eyes widened.

"Him?" Kyle whispered.

The teacher read the names of the kids on the register until reading out, "Ethan Marsh."

The teacher looked up, "Oh boy, let's hope he behaves better than you two."

"Hey Mr. Garrison," Stan waved.

"I should have known you two would be butt-buddies."

"We get that a lot," Kyle grinned.

"Well as much as I'd like to stay and chat, I have a class to teach, come now Ethan, don't be shy."

Ethan ducked behind Stan's legs. Stan crouched to his level.

"You'll be okay," Stan smiled, giving his son a kiss to the forehead, "I'll be here when you get let out later."

Ethan nodded and gave his dads a last hug, letting Kyle kiss his forehead, before going inside.

"He's getting so big, so fast," Stan said, a tear coming to his eye.

"Seeing him start school makes me feel so old," Kyle sighed, "It seems like only yesterday we had the loudest baby ever in South Park."

"You're not old," Stan chuckled, "You're only thirty-one."

"Oy vey," Kyle groaned, "Don't remind me."

"How old do you think I feel? I'm older than you!"

Kyle shook his head, their argument continued all the way out of the schoolyard.

They went to the park with Jake before dropping him off at Gerald's because they were going to Shakey's to meet their friends for lunch, Kyle's shift didn't start until two.

Kenny, Butters, Cartman and Wendy were all sitting at one table. Wendy was heavily pregnant, when she had been pregnant the first time, she had been a week away from the child's due date when a drunk driver had hit the passenger side of the car she was in with her husband. Wendy had luckily escaped with minor injuries, but she had lost the baby. They hadn't been ready to try again until eight months ago.

"Hey," Stan said as he and Kyle sat down.

"How was it?" Kenny asked.

"Harder than I thought," Kyle answered.

"I didn't think it would be as hard as it was with my kids," Kenny agreed, "How was he?"

"Terrified," Stan frowned, "Then again, I would be if Mr. Garrison was my teacher."

"He's still there?" Cartman asked incredulously.

"He was Kenny's bunch's third grade teacher," Butters said.

"He said that he should've known that we'd be butt-buddies," Kyle shrugged, "Oddly enough, I'm not too bothered by that."

"He has a point," Wendy said.

Stan and Kyle both looked at her with a raised eyebrow, making Kenny laugh at how similar their expressions were.

"When I went out with Stan when we were kids, I was essentially going out with Kyle too…"

"Didn't need to hear that," Cartman chuckled.

"…Simply because you two were always together. I think Kyle tagged along even when he wasn't asked, I was the third wheel every time."

Stan smiled and kissed his husband's cheek, "Maybe I always knew, I just never realised."

"Maybe that's the reason I agreed to that experiment so quickly," Kyle laid his head on his husband's shoulder as he spoke, Stan wrapped his arm around his waist and kissed the top of the ushanka Kyle still insisted on wearing.

After having the pizza that usually accompanied going to Shakey's, Kyle's phone alarm went off.

"I gotta go," Kyle said, "I'll see you later."

"See you later," Stan replied, pulling his husband into a kiss before he left.

He'd spend the rest of the day with his friends before he went to pick up the kids and wait at home for Kyle, where they'd take the rest of their lives a step at a time.

That's the end of Functional, but the series isn't over yet. The oneshots will continue until I stop getting ideas and requests. Special thanks to those of you who followed both stories all the way through, you guys kept me writing. Next, I'm going to finish Beaten, Battered, Bruised before starting any other new projects. One idea I've had is giving all of the characters different personalities, so tell me what you'd think of that.