Update - Melting Chapter 14
I hate crying as I write, I can't see what I'm doing!
I managed to write the bit of them finishing their argument but I had to move on after that as my soggy brain couldn't function then! I had written the remainder of the chapter already, so, here you go.
Italics mean the character is thinking.
Bold mean Zangetsu
Bold Italic mean Hichigo
' ' means Ichigo talking to his Hollow/Zangetsu.
Melting.
Previously –
"…Let me finish please. I had to rehearse this as it was." Ichigo's laughed. "I've been backed into a corner I can't get out of…"
…
"Right!" Ichigo snarled snatching up his jeans from the floor beginning to dress in anything that came to hand. "Do you have any idea, how much this is hurting me?" Ichigo could not longer contain his emotions causing through him in torrents. Huge wet fat tears began to fall and his voice cracked out in broken sobs. "This is all I wanted… and its… its all one sided…I love you…but I'm the only one I can see hurting…the only one who is going to get hurt… I've played right into your hands… I'm an idiot… well I can't do it… I can't do part time… what gives you the right to decide this? what did you think I would do? … you didn't think at all did you… you didn't think how this would hurt me… I wish you'd never come back… never sent me that damn letter…" He grabbed up his bag and headed towards the door.
"Ichigo, please wait." If Ichigo had turned, his hand still on the door handle and seen any emotion he might have answered differently. But when he turned, he saw the same expression and stance that the man showed any given day of his life. Everything perfectly in place. Well if it didn't take this to make him human…Ichigo didn't want to care anymore.
He turned back to the door and shook his head. "No. Goodbye." He turned the handle and opened the door, his foot stepped outside…
Now…
Byakuya suddenly felt like a candle that had been burning for some hours continually. On the outside, it was as tall, its walls looked solid, it had given out its light and heat to the best of its ability. But on the inside, it was a molten mush, where the sides would crumble at the lightest touch. It's warmth and light had not been enough to light the room and its occupants.
Ichigo felt the swish of wind as Byakuya appeared in front of him. That face was stoic and perpetuated his intense fury.
"Get out of my way." He said with the almost silent venom he could muster.
Two hands appeared on his chest.
"You are not leaving." It was an order borne out of desperation and a man at the end of his grasp of reality. With fingers vainly stretching out to grasp any faint link to his sanity.
"I am." Ichigo tried to side step, but the hands pushed him back into the flat, Byakuya's foot firmly kicking the door shut. It was then that Ichigo noticed that the hands were trembling and Byakuya's eyes, the door to his soul, were anything but stoic.
"I never said this was simple Ichigo. I never said that this was black and white…I did say that I was backed into a corner. You can't just tune out half of what I said to suit you and think you can throw this back into my face…You think that this is a walk in the park for me to go against thousands of years of tradition? Risk being denounced by my family because of you? Risk my entire clan erupting in blood shed because of you? To accept my fate in a marriage with a woman I have no knowledge of? To humble myself in front of you and show you how weak I feel right now. If you step outside this door…" He had to pause and draw on his inner reserves not to let himself cave into the huge emotion tidal wave threatening to engulf him. "I really…honestly…do not know what I would do…I hate myself for putting us in this position. For letting myself get this attached…I have never begged anyone for anything in my life Ichigo…Please. Do not leave me."
Ancient eyes closed. The inner turmoil was shredding away dignity, pride and stateliness; its wounds cut into the hands that still clenched at Ichigo, in the form of an uncontrollable tremor. Tears seeped like the leakage of his being, ripped away with a fatal wound to the heart. Everything pinned on Ichigo, everything in his existence was hinged on Ichigo being there, with his invisible presence in his heart and soul. It had grown and given him strength, purpose and reason. Without Ichigo, his life no longer meant anything. His family archaic as they were, could not understand the elemental need for love or the simple addiction that was this orange headed youth.
A millennia of training, fell to his feet as he opened his eyes. "You hold my life in your hands." He whispered slowly withdrawing his grasp and moving away from the door. Ichigo watched him walk slowly to the sofa and seat himself 'precariously on the edge'. It was up to him now. Byakuya could not trust himself to say anything else.
He sat and stared down at his hands at the trembling that refused to ease, the sighs in his chest building up towards melt down. He closed his eyes again. Control. Breathe…Cease this…Please. His head shook from side to side as he acknowledged he couldn't control and cease. He couldn't do anything but sit here petrified. Fear engulfing him. Fear that wrenched a loud strangled sound from his throat before it could be caught. His hands covered his lips dare another one try for release.
His candle light blew out.
Aizen himself could not have performed such a quick and effective breakage as this.
Ichigo should be proud of himself. It was a strength Aizen would have admired.
Ichigo shifted on his feet. He stared at the figure. Two forces pushed and pulled him. One stood at his back pushing him towards the pitiful downcast figure and its unchecked retsui leaking despair. The other pushed him back towards the door, towards the release of his anger and freedom from the pain that thundered around his chest.
Serves the bastard right, hey Ichigo! The force of his Hollows delight chilled Ichigo to the core. What did he do all this time? He did everything he could for his friends, risked his life in doing so. He didn't love them with the same intensity.
Why are you still standing here? Zangetsu spoke. This is what you wanted. The blade of truth plunged into his already burning chest. Ichigo had received everything he ever wanted this weekend. He'd got Byakuya to declare his love, to return to him. He'd been his happiest ever since his mother died. Complete, safe and wanted. Byakuya's soul had screamed its agony at him for his threat to leave. He was Byakuya's completeness, safety and need.
He was needed by him. By Byakuya. HE WAS NEEDED BY BYAKUYA.
I got everything I wanted? I didn't mean for this. I didn't know how much this would hurt. Why did it have to hurt? To see exactly how he felt…how much I mattered…but can I share him? Isn't part of him better than nothing? I've said that before…
Who'd have thought hey Ichigo? The ice man's melted. The ice man has left the building. Ohh yuck that's going to soil the upholstery. Water damage is such a bugger to get rid of too.
Love. Ichigo loved Byakuya. Byakuya loved Ichigo. The truth was that simple.
The wind and rain howled painfully loud in his ears but Hichigo stood drenched and soaking with his arms crossed a smug smile across his face. Zangetsu looked at him.
What? You wanna stand in this any longer?
Byakuya felt so small and insignificant against the arms that pulled him into their chest. His own hands that held back the wretched sounds failed, as the last ice blocks of his previously impenetrable barrier slid into pulp.
"I'm sorry." Whispered kisses fell on the top of his head. "What if you like her more than me? What if you fall in love with her? Where will that leave me? Ending it now just seems to be the easiest way to avoid being hurt later on."
Byakuya had nothing to say. Nothing that could make this better for either of them. He could not give assurances that he would not fall in love with someone he had not met, although, he doubted it was possible to fall in love with two people equally. Ichigo would always have held the largest portion of his heart. He just stayed still, being the one comforted for a change, the one with the greatest need. The one crying the hardest.
Ichigo felt the fear of walking away now inside himself and measured it against the fear of Byakuya falling in love with his wife. There was no comparison. Would my heart be half empty or half full? I'd reject empty but risk my life for the fullness. He stroked a long tendril of hair and felt the skin beneath his palms. "I won't leave you...I can't do it." Ichgio murmured. "I'm sorry byakuya, sorry. I didn't think... I didn't know how much it mattered." He'd expected Byakuya's head to look up and kiss him. To share some words of assurance back. "Byakuya?"
"Thank you." was the faintest of responses and Ichgio felt the swell of relief wash over the despair before it slowly began to recede.
X
Byakuya picked up the volume of his family history and laid it on his table. He'd found it. He'd found his evidence.
The servant hesitated at the sight of her master knelling on the floor, his head resting on the pages of the open book and weeping. She slid the door shut and left him to his thoughts.
X
Byakuya felt a glow of pleasure. There was a reason he was the head of the family, why he was more suitable, birth rights aside. Sitting here facing them all and the spluttering Elders looking at him in shock was a thrill he was relishing.
"But…"
"Your concerns are irrelevant. The family law states that I may pursue more than one relationship. I may even have more if I choose."
"That law is almost prehistoric, no one has followed it for centuries."
"The law still stands." They couldn't deny him that, he'd done his homework, shown them the evidence and was still agreeing to continue with the arranged marriage.
"I will not tolerate this! Father do something!" Byakuya knew that this cousin, Noriaki, was the main contender in the challenge against him. The bulk of the group around him were all from the same branch of the family and looking at him with glares equal to his own. "You continually abuse your position!
"My position…" Byakuya pressed his retsui pressure around the room adding weight to his threateningly calm tone. "…Is only undermined by the way your branch of the family continue to conduct themselves in such an underhand manner!" The pressure increased further, he had point to prove that no one in this room could match half his strength. "Does anyone here wish to speak aloud of their conduct?"
"Noriaki and his men have been campaigning continually to my son and I to go against you despite our refusals." One spoke. "We wish to formally reject his opinions from any family matters."
"They should be punished." A nameless voice from the back called.
"Your trying to divide the family!" Noriaki threw the accusation towards the captain. "Your actions are always for selfish personal reasons!"
The pressure was lifted from the rest of the clan and settled firmly over the trouble making branch members. They struggled to remain composed and looked at each other with worried glances. They had not expected this turn of events. Everyone had been expected to side with them.
"It seems that the only ones trying to divide the family are yourselves for your own selfish desire for power. Others have spoken against you. Your conduct casts the shadow of shame over the Kuchiki family name. Your fate will be decided by the elders before the next meeting. You would be wise to act in an honorable way until that time."
X
Byakuya was sitting in his study writing a letter to Ichigo when the knock came on the door. He looked up to the proud face of his grandfather and his rigid noble face.
"You should hear what they are saying about you now?" The meeting had only ended twenty minutes ago, he doubted that they were going to be that positive.
"Enlighten me."
"That, your arguably the best caretaker of the family." Byakuya sighed relieved and smiled inwardly. "Yet, this relationship of yours…is it worth it?"
"Of course."
"Did you consider if your proposal would be refused?"
"Of course."
"And your actions would you have lost?"
"I would no longer be sitting here, but wearing an untraceable gagai and heading towards the home I have in the Real World." The eyes were startled that stared back at him. "Without hesitation." Byakuya added kicking his foot accidentally against the packed bag under the desk.
X
The tea was pleasant, if all but a bit polite. Byakuya could not doubt Michico Kubo's upbringing. Nor could he deny that she was beautiful. Her long ebony waist length hair, rich chocolate eyes and slim build were pleasant to the eye. She would be a pretty decoration for official occasions and their children no doubt would be regal in appearance.
"Your house is most agreeable." She smiled gracing him with yet another compliment.
"And how are your preparations going?"
"They are timely." She smiled. Another pause in conversation. It didn't bother Byakuya, but his future wife was not that comfortable, especially with what she had heard recently. "I wonder if I might ask you something?" Her eyes glanced to her round plump and unfit governess who suddenly appeared to be trying to gain her attention.
"I wonder, if you would be so kind as to accompany me into the gardens." Byakuya asked her. "I would be happy to answer your questions as we walked."
"I should like that." She smiled, maybe he was not the tyrant she had heard of.
The gardens were beautiful. "The views from the top of the path are wonderful this time of year." Byakuya suggested and Michico looked up the steep range of paths and steps.
"Maybe we should stay down here, the weather does not look favourable." The governess spoke almost fighting her vertigo and nursing a premature heart attack that would surely strike if she climbed that path. Byakuya paid her no attention and began to walk the path and Michico followed soon after with the assurance that she would stay in view of the governess should she need her.
"It seems that your question earlier was not to the liking of your companion." Byakuya broke the silence that fell on them when they reached the summit.
"She is afraid I would upset you." He looked at her and waited for her to continue. "The rumour is that you have a mistress already."
"A mistress?"
"You are invoking an old law of your family for multiple partners."
"I do not have a mistress."
"But…"
"I have a…I believe the term he uses is 'boyfriend'. Not my choice of words, it is a human thing."
He paid her no attention whilst she took in that information and looked at him a little bewildered. "A man a human man?"
"I will continue a relationship here with you and a human relationship in the real world. There will be only a minor cross over of locations."
"Right." She said uncertainly.
"I promise you that I will remain discrete regarding the relationship. The rumours you have heard concern me, and I will deal with them immediately."
"May I meet them?" Byakuya was not expecting that question. He looked at her assessing her mindset and saw no undue concern or even anger at the suggestion of a dual relationship. It was easier than the conversation with Ichigo.
"The war preparations will require his attendance in Seireitei sooner or later. It would be prudent to wait until after our marriage."
"Where will he stay when he is here?" There was the note of concern, he could hear it in the undertones.
"There is always division quarters. He is however acquainted with my sister Rukia."
X
"Ichigo you should come at us both with the intent to kill us." Byakuya held his serious emotionless expression.
"Us?" Isshin questioned as if it was an insane suggestion.
"Is that clear Ichigo?" Byakuya asked just raising a hand to silence his father.
"Ahh Isshin, if I was in your shoes I would be saying Bankai." Kisuke chuckled.
"Against my son?" He said amazed as he turned feeling the swirl of deep red power fill the room. "Holy shit…How…What…Did you teach him this Byakuya?"
"No, this is what he used to defeat me. But he was not as powerful as this then. This is what he used to defeat the Arrancer. Be on your guard Isshin. He is a Vizard after all."
The cero that roared towards a panting Isshin was the last blow. Byakuya flew in front of the breathless man, winded by that too powerful kick that the boy used as a cannon to destroy the raised peaks in the desert setting. He deflected the cero blast with his blade and held up a hand in defeat. His stamina all but extinguished and knowing Isshin must have some pretty sore ribs right now.
Hichigo grinned and let Ichigo removed the mask. Blood streaked down the side of his head and his thigh was pretty torn up, but he felt alive. Brimming with energy and ready for more.
"Hey pervert, wanna carry on?" He turned to Kisuke. "I think I can take that hat and blow it to smithereens now."
"Oh you do like to pick on a mans weakness don't you!" Kisuke all but hugged his hat and stroked the rim as if it was a lover. "There my pet, I won't let him touch you!"
Ichigo saw a rouse of distraction if ever he'd seen one. Kisuke's launch at him was not at all unexpected.
"I never imagined…" Isshin hissed as he stood and gripped his chest as he felt the broken ribs make their presence known.
"You seem to have got rusty." Byakuya wiped the perspiration that dared to drip down his regal face. "Where as…" They watched the fierce clash of Zanpakutō. "I have been surpassed."
"It is the way of things for one generation to pass the previous." Damn Ichigo making me read Nartuo! (A/N sorry couldn't resist that! Kakashi word perfect?)
"Does the old man want to use him in the war?"
"You are witnessing the only person strong enough to take Aizen on. Although Sōtaichō, does not seem willing to let us train him to his potential."
"But, he's only 16. I can't lose him too."
"I can't lose him either." Isshin looked at the man who was watching every strike and counter attack. Byakuya didn't even realise he has spoke aloud.