Chapter 14 – in which John Smith gets his comeuppance and it's all very Horrible. Several people are confused about their identity and who the hell is Bad Horse? More importantly, how does Maes even know about him? Find out the answer to this and more, like if home is where the heart is, why don't we reside in our own bodies, in this chapter.

Chapter Soundtrack: Brand New Day – Neil Patrick Harris – from Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog (as sung by Roy Mustang)

Slipping – Neil Patrick Harris – from Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog (as sung by Roy Mustang)

Maes, Riza and Roy were walking up to Ed's cell when John appeared. They glared at him. "I never told you guys why I did it!" John said cheerfully. "I did it just because you wanted to, Mustang."

"I wanted to what?" Roy replied.

"I'll just leave it at right before I tried to kill her, I stole her first kiss."

Roy bristled, wanting to wipe him off the face of the planet. On his left, Maes was almost as angry but on his right, Riza was even more pissed. The aura coming from her was so thick you could almost see it. He took a deep breath. "Go ahead, Hawkeye."

Riza practically leapt for John. "How dare you even touch my little sister!" He tried to run away but she was quicker, whacking him upside the face with a frying pan.

While Maes hoped that John would meet an untimely end at the hands of Riza, Roy wanted to sing. "This appeared as a moral dilemma 'cause at first it was weird…" Then he smiled. "It's true; I was vague on the how so can it be that you have shown me the light? It's a brand new day and the sun is high. All the birds are singing that you're gonna die. How I hesitated, now I wonder why, it's a brand new day." He held up his hands in fists and unfolded and folded his fingers forwards and backwards in perfect sequence. "Now the future's so bright and I owe it all to you who showed me the light." He lowered his hands. "The water's rising but I know the course. I'm gonna shock the world." He saw Ed move out of the corner of his eye, approaching the bars. "It's a brand new day." He turned to look at her. "And…" he took a random breath. "… will see the …" he trailed off. "…me, not a joke, not a dork, not a failure and she may cry but her tears will dry when I hand her the keys to a shiny new Australia."

"Where?" Maes asked as Riza twisted John's arm, thereby pinning him to the ground and stepping up to stand on his back.

Roy had a song to finish. "It's a brand new day and the sun is high. All the angels sing because you're gonna die. Go ahead and laugh. Yeah, I'm a funny guy. Tell everyone goodbye. It's a brand new day."

The medics arrived for John. "Oh! I'm in pain! I think this is what pain feels like!" he shrieked.

"Wah, wah," said one.

"Momma! Riza Hawkeye beat me up again!"

"Good for her. Now shut up," said the other as they took him away.

"I made a grown man cry for his mother," said Riza. "My work here is done."

There was an evil sounding laugh. The ending 'ha ha' gave away the identity of the laugher.

"Roy?" Maes prompted as they stared at him.

Roy was staring after John. "So go ahead, run away. Say it was horrible. Spread the word, tell a friend. Tell them the tale. Look at him! Not a word! Hammer, meet Nail. Then I win, then I get everything I ever… all the cash! All the fame! And social change. Anarchy – that I run. It's Doctor Horrible's turn. You people all have to learn…"

"Excuse me for interrupting," said Riza, "especially since you were in the middle of such a jolly song but who's Dr. Horrible?"

"I don't even know, it just sounded good there."

"You know, I found myself singing about a character named Bad Horse earlier," said Maes as an anecdote. "It was weird but the weirdest part is I was in a trio with Armstrong and Falman."

There was an awkward silence following until Ed broke it. "Hey guys, is my name Penny?"

"No," said Riza. "It's Edwarda."

"Good." She looked at them. "Can we go now?"