Lost in the Fog
A/N: This is a pretty dialogue heavy chapter. So I apologize in advance if it bores you to tears.
Disclaimer: Definitely not mine. They all belong to the wonderful genius that is Miyazaki Hayao.
+ [ n e w s . f r o m . a . m e e t i n g ] +
chapter fourteen
Chihiro toyed with the amulet that rested on her chest. Her fingers traced the curve of the sapphire wings, and lingered around the feathered edges, enjoying the warmth that resounded through her. Grasping the cylindrical quartz, she felt strong crackles of energy jolt through her, a sensation she had come to consider as part of her second skin.
Over the recent weeks, she had developed a strong connection with the object, feeling bereft and empty if she took it off of her (which wasn't often). And curiously enough, she found that she could detect its presence wherever and whenever she wanted. Either it had some strange powers, or she was being influenced to develop some of her own, little as that may be.
Removing her hand, she stared up at the ceiling, ignoring the throbbing pain that stabbed her back and shoulders. Whatever it was, Chihiro had kept a very keen watch over it, taking solace in the idea that Kazuo was near. He was her only link back to the outside world who knew of her troubles and she missed his sarcasm, witty remarks, and playful behavior.
"Chihiro?"
Snapping her head around, she searched out her friend. "Yeah?" Chihiro answered, pushing herself up onto her feet. Wobbling slightly, she grimaced at the sore muscles and bruises that screamed in protest at her sudden movement.
"It says here you're to report to the upstairs management," Rin said, her body hunched over to look at the board, eyes narrowed.
"Upstairs management?" she said, quirking an eyebrow in response. Was that another fancy name Yubaba used for herself now?
Rin turned and gazed at her. There was no easy way to break this, so she spoke, slowly and with clear enunciation. "It's Haku."
Chihiro paused, hands frozen over her half-folded bed sheets. Haku? Why would he ever have need to talk to me now? After the many attempts I made and the way he avoided me like the plague, I thought he made his message very clear that he didn't want to see me? Her heart thudded loudly in her ears and her mouth felt dry and sticky. She swallowed down a lungful of air, before letting out a jerky sigh.
"I'm sure you'll be fine," Rin comforted, patting the younger woman on the back. "He probably wouldn't ask for you unless it was important, right?"
It took a moment, but Chihiro nodded, her hands starting to feel the oncoming prickle of sweat. With overly precise and calculated measurements, she folded her futon into perfect thirds and shoved it into the closet with the others.
Rin frowned, knowing the anxiety her friend must be going through. If she was treated with the cold indifference that Chihiro had been subjected to, and was then asked to spend an extended period of time with that person in an enclosed room, she'd be having issues too. It wouldn't do for her to go off meeting him like a mouse who had their tail stepped on. She'd probably make it worst for herself.
"If he tries to act like a jerk toward you, just tell me, and I'll punch him in the face!" she said cheekily, pleased when the younger girl broke into a smile.
Stepping off the elevator, bright colors and tacky gold walls blinded her from all sides. Yubaba's love for the extravagant and gaudy made her feel a lot more intimidated than she should. And she didn't need to be reminded of her lowly status; it was harped to her over and over every day.
Chihiro paused briefly in front of the door, a hand on the cool surface. She took a deep breath before slipping in without a sound. Despite being up here countless times, she never figured out the layout of the place. It was beyond impossible and she kept a firm grip on her amulet.
At least her feet seemed to know where she was going, taking her past fancily carved doors gilded with precious gemstones, and guiding her around turns. Finally, she came to a stop in front of a large, deep-toned varnished oak door. Compared to the others she had seen, this one was almost plain, but no less imposing. Simple and straight lines etched out a border, while a polished brass plaque sat near the top with "Manager" spelled out in bold strokes.
Chihiro stared at the words, her emotions smashed together in an ever compacting ball inside of her, and she exhaled loudly. This was it, this was where she would get the final answers she had long wanted, and she wasn't sure if she was ready for them. Raising up a hand, she gave three sharp raps on the door.
"Enter."
Her fingers trembled as she slid the door open and stepped in. She kept her head lowered, eyes fixed on the ground. The tension crackled in the air and threatened to drag her under. A soft noise brought her gaze up and she stared at him. His green eyes were piercing against his dark hair, his face a picture of perfectly controlled emotions.
"Sit," he said, a deep, low quality that broke through the silence of the room. Haku gestured at the chair in front of him, and raised an eyebrow when she didn't move. "If you please," he added with a faint trace of a smirk.
Chihiro sank into the offered seat, looking everywhere except at him. The room was a spitting reflection of him. Everything was set up neat and orderly, with not a scrap of paper lying around on the ground. His furniture consisted mostly of a large table, a couple of chairs, a sofa, and a bookshelf that spanned the length of a wall.
"I'm glad that my furnishings meet your approval," Haku said, causing her to whip her head back around to face him.
She stared at him, her gaze of careful scrutiny. Chihiro had hoped he would take the initiative and lead the conversation so she wouldn't have to do the talking, but the only response she got from him was silence. Finally, she blurted out, "What do you want from me?"
"I'll get to that. Later." He waved a hand and a stack of papers blinked into existence, floating around in the air until they settled on top his desk. Haku rifled through them briefly, and shifted them into some organization he was happy with. Chihiro watched his hands move as objects danced to his command, and she started when he spoke. "You do know how to add figures and calculate inventory, right?"
"Yes."
"Good." He brought out a thick, leather bound book that had papers hanging out at the edges, and a multitude of different colored ribbons dangling out near the spine.
A cloud of dust escaped into the air, and he grimaced, fanning it away. The pages crinkled under his touch and more than a few of them were yellowed with age. There were columns and columns of numbers, some with notes added in a curvy script, and her eyes widened in amazement at the amount of detailed information.
"This is a ledger," Haku broke in, "It's where we keep all our financial transactions. Each shipment, product, or service that we acquire is recorded in this book," he said, finger pausing on a relevant note of interest. "And this is what you're going to be doing."
He slid the book towards her, and she stared at it in confusion. This is what I'm going to be doing? What exactly does that mean? Her fingers drifted over the letters, and she drew them back to her sides. "Haku, what do you want from me? What exactly am I here for?"
There was a heavy silence that choked the air, and he tapped his desk. "You're now my newly turned assistant." She opened her mouth, ready to protest, but he shook his head and continued, "What that means is that you'll be in charge of balancing our finances, calculating inventory, answering any messages that need addressing, and sending out statements for purchase orders, or whatever else that I need you to do."
But Chihiro wasn't satisfied. After being rejected and ignored on a near daily basis, this simple explanation wasn't going to cut it. She deserved answers, and she was going to get them. All the unspoken words she had meant to say bubbled up to the surface and almost leapt off her tongue. "Why? Why do you need me to do this job for you when you have made it perfectly clear that you want nothing to do with me..." Chihiro paused, swallowing. "Why did you call me up here, when you can ask the many dozens of workers here who are more than capable of doing this job for you?"
As soon as she was finished, her cheeks flamed, and she dropped her gaze, unable to stare him in the eye. If the earth opened up and swallowed her in a giant hole right now that would be excellent, instead of dying from mortification. A soft, low laughter reached her ears and she looked up.
"I'm sorry to say but you are the only person fit for this job. You overestimate their abilities, especially when it comes to simple arithmetic. But that's not what you've come to hear is it?"
Chihiro nodded.
"So ask me."
Ask me? That's it? Ask me? Is he serious! Chihiro bristled at his words, fighting the urge to grind her teeth together. The confusion, hurt, and worries she held over the past couple of months can't just be swept away by some declarative statement. She clenched her hands into fists and sat up straight. There were dozens of questions that pinged back and forth but she had already picked out the one she would ask long ago.
"Why are you avoiding me?"
A corner of his mouth curved upward in the barest of smirks. "I knew you were going to pick the most difficult question to answer." He sighed. "I needed to know if I could trust you – if you were that same girl who came here those many years before."
Chihiro blinked. His words stung her, and she was surprised at how much they hurt. It was as if someone had driven rusty nails into the top layer of her skin and left them to fester. "Why would you need to know if you can trust me? I'm the same person you've met before, why should now, and yes, I know that I'm a bit older, but why should that make it any difference?" She took a deep breath to steady herself, and said, "I would've thought that our experiences together were enough to prove to you that I'm not a terrible person."
He shook his head. "And I would say yes, yes it is enough, but things are not the same. Tell me, Chihiro, how long do you think it's been since you were last here?"
What? Is he toying with me or something? "Seven years. If I was ten when I left and I'm seventeen now than it's been seven years."
"Wrong. It's more closer to a hundred."
Chihiro's mouth dropped open. "How is that possible? Kamajii and Rin–"
"Are immortal," he finished for her. "We live forever, and most spirits, if not all, don't care about a concept such as time. It's just a vague idea that bears no importance on our day to day lives. The Spirit World and Human World don't operate on the same time scales and many spirits don't understand that."
She sat there in silence, words on the tip of her tongue. She opened her mouth and just as quickly closed it again and again, unable to piece together what she wanted to say. A hundred years? "But... But if that's the case it still doesn't explain why you had to ignore me."
"Actually, it does. Your appearance here is very suspicious. It's impossible for anyone, a human especially, to enter the Spirit World, so how is it that you were able to casually walk right in here without any trouble?" Haku's gaze was piercing, and she bowed her head in response.
The necklace under her tunic pressed against her skin, and her hand came to rest over her chest, her fingers giving an involuntary twitch. Perhaps, maybe, just maybe, if she showed him the amulet it would assuage any doubts he had about her? "You must never let anyone see it" whispered to her and she dropped her arm back down to her side.
Haku's eyes narrowed as he followed her movements but refrained from commenting. "Your presence here tempts danger for yourself and the workers who live here. I'm sure you've noticed the harsher treatment you've been subjected to, right?"
She nodded. "But I thought they just wanted me to prove myself."
"Perhaps. Perhaps not. They're afraid, Chihiro. Your existence here brings them face to face with a fear they don't want to admit." There was a brief pause, and she could feel his intense gaze burn through her. "It's because you're a human."
Chihiro didn't know if she should be affronted or enraged. "What does that have to do with anything?" she said with more force than she intended.
"Everything." He leaned forward, green eyes piercing through her, and she gulped. "Murders have been occurring throughout the land. And it's not just single individuals that have been targeted as a means of revenge - entire towns, villages; even whole cities have been flattened to the ground."
Her body felt as if it had been plunged in freezing water, and she gasped, eyes wide. "Why? Why would someone do such a thing?"
"We don't know. There have been no survivors and any witnesses that could have helped us are dead." He sighed, shaking his head. "But these attacks had just one thing in common."
Chihiro's chest felt constricted, and she didn't dare take a breath. She knew what was coming next but that didn't mean she was eager to hear it.
"Humans. All of these places at one point or another had given refuge to them, and now they're gone. Many workers feel that with you here, our bathhouse could be next." There was a brief pause, and she could feel his eyes on her. "Which is why you must not stay here. Once I figure out how to send you safely across the border, you're going home, and that is final."
She bit back her retort at the finality in his tone. He was concerned for her, and she understood why he felt that he had to do this, but nothing he said would deter her. Chihiro didn't come here to play games, she came here to find a missing part of herself, and solve a mystery that had been haunting her. If Haku wanted her to leave, she wasn't going to move without a fight. Of course, when he spoke next, the great heaving rant she had worked up was quickly forgotten.
"But for now, I'm going to have you work for me." Haku flipped through a stack of papers behind him, and returned with a piece of parchment and laid it out in front of her. He grabbed a quill that had a long, white and gray-tipped feather and handed it over to her. "I would need you to sign this contract before anything else." At seeing her furrowed expression he added, "If you want. You don't have to work for me if you don't want to."
"Contract? But what about the one I signed with Yubaba?" Chihiro asked, frowning.
Haku's green eyes darkened to almost black. "You signed a contract with Yubaba? What in the world would prompt you to do such a foolish thing? Don't you remember what happened the last time you were here?"
Chihiro glared at him. "Of course I do! I'm not that stupid. I needed a job and Yubaba gave me one, on the condition that she doesn't steal my name, and that I'll work for her to repay my debts without tip, complaint, or vacation," she snapped.
Haku huffed out a loud sigh. "Very well. That's actually a fair contract, considering." He brought out the paper once again, and placed the pen in her hand. "My contract is a typical, standard contract; no fine print, or tricks."
She glanced over at the writing, reading it through for any loopholes, and after finding it to her approval, signed her characters at the bottom of the sheet. When she finished the last stroke, it floated away from her and disappeared into a folder on the shelves behind him.
There was just something else that kept teasing and prodding at her. And she fidgeted around in her seat, the question dancing on her tongue. She really wanted to know... "So, does this explain why you've been stalking me?" Chihiro blurted out, and her cheeks immediately flushed a bright pink. How could she have asked that? She sank down into her seat, mortified.
"I have a business to operate and manage, which includes the welfare of my employees. I don't have the time to stalk young women around the bathhouse at all hours of the day," he said with sharply clipped words. Gazing at her reaction, he added in a softer tone, "I stayed nearby in order to keep an eye on you in case you got yourself into trouble, and also to see how you respond and react to different situations. It's what helped me realize that you were the same person I had met all those years before."
If she wasn't blushing earlier, she was definitely doing so now. Her face must have been a gigantic strawberry and her emotions couldn't decide if she was ashamed of herself or embarrassed. But the one thing she couldn't deny was that his ever present figure had given her a sense of security and comfort. And, most importantly, he had been there when she needed him most.
Bowing her head, she whispered a quiet, "Thank you."
Haku nodded. Not knowing what to say, Chihiro fiddled with the end of her uniform, scrunching it beneath her fingers. The silence pressed down on her, and she could feel the tension in every exhale of breath. There had to be something she would feel comfortable talking about. After all, wasn't she the one who had set it upon herself to get all the answers?
"Haku, I–"
As soon as the words left her mouth, a loud chorus of chirps began to sound outside. The both turned and stared out the window. The sky was tinged with streaks of pink across the horizon and drifting clouds were traced by rays of orange glowing behind them.
"There will be time for questions later," he said, giving her a smile. "And before the sun rises any higher, it's essential that I explain to you what your work schedule is."
"Do I just come here once I wake up?" Chihiro asked.
"No. Once you've finished the chores you've been assigned, you'll come up here and do whatever tasks I have for you. If you aren't able to make it up here before curfew then don't bother. It's not essential that you have to be here every day but I would prefer it if you tried to come as often as possible," he finished, watching her nod in response. "If you don't have anymore questions...?"
She shook her head.
"Good," he said. Haku smirked when he saw her stifle a yawn. "Then you may leave."
Chihiro stood up, pushing her chair in, and bowed slightly. "Thank you."
Haku repeated the action and walked her to the door. Not wanting to seem rude, she turned and gave him a smile. "Goodnight, Haku."
He grabbed her wrist as she made to leave, and she stared down at his fingers in surprise. Haku's eyes widened and he let go as quickly as he had reached for her. But when she looked up at him, his face was the same controlled expression she had seen from him many times before.
"Please call me by my proper title from now on. It undermines my position with the workers if you keep referring to me so casually," he said.
"I understand."
And with that, she left, taking the elevator down to her floor. Her gaze kept straying to her wrist and the lingering sensation left by the warmth of his touch.
A/N 2: Man, I am so happy that I'm done with this chapter. I rewrote it three times. Anyway, I'm sorry that I haven't updated this story in forever. I've been extremely busy and now that it's summer I have a lot more time to write. This is actually a brand new chapter because I'm now done with revisions from what was leftover of the old one and I hope I never have to do it again for this story.
I'm so out of touch with my writing and it's gotten super rusty. I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Hehe. Haku and Chihiro are always fun to play with.
Thanks: I must thank anyone and everyone who's read my story, and for those of you who had enough patience to wait for me. I know it's been long but here it is! I also want to say thanks for those of you who left me such kind words in your reviews. They being: pika995, AwesomeOliver, Mary (yep! and haha, glad someone loves mitsuko too!), GreenHarmony (thanks so much for your many reviews!), The Fuzy Llama (haha, yep he's a nod to inuyasha, and after him nobody seems rude anymore lol), BrokenWish (haku as a stalker? now that's an interesting idea…), Dragowolf, oceanblue19945, EterNite, LaughingDeath77, PoisonCrysell, walks-with-nose-in-book, angel19872006, scissorhero, and Bianca! Once again, thank you so much!