The air at County General pulsed with the remaining energy of the last few hours. It'd never happened before—the Chief had never slugged another employee, but then again, none has ever been as repulsive as Dale Edson. Anspaugh had never lost his cool over anything, at least not that she could recall, but their personalities were miles apart. Donald was always a bit passive for her taste, whereas Romano was abrasive, but never went down without a fight.

Lucy tried to focus on the rest of her shift, but her thoughts kept drifting to the man she admired and respected, and how he was doing. Was Dale telling the truth about her curly-haired best friend crying earlier? Was anything he said true? She sighed, wondering why she hadn't slugged him herself, especially after the nasty and utterly despicable things he'd said about Elizabeth. Robert gave up a little too easy she reckoned, and if that'd been Carter, Dale would probably be in a body bag or a full body cast.

Lucy pulled a toy solider out of a toddler's nose and splinted a little girl's leg after a rolling skating accident; she'd argued with Cleo about a patient who ended up needing surgery, then Peter grilled her about the incident, but agreed with her assessment. They operated, and afterwards, she and John snuck off for a bite of food before the hospital managed to suck them back in.

She ran the Trauma with Carter of a little girl whose parents were in bad shape after a bad MVA—roll over crash, and they weren't recovered for about three hours after it happened because of the impenetrable rain but their daughter laid in the wet grass for only an hour before a good Samaritan had found her and dropped her off at County.

While she and Morgenstern wheeled her mother to the OR, Elizabeth and Peter following with the father, John sat with Five-year-old Hannah, sticking her in Curtain 2 so she could have more privacy.

So far, she only had non-life-threatening injuries, but John was watching a finicky spleen and pancreatic injury very carefully for any signs of rupture.

—

She observed the silent way he scrubbed and wondered how he was able to quiet the voices in his head—quiet the nervousness in his belly before an upcoming surgery, and she dried her hands, she wished Robert was around, so she could pick his brain, but mostly so she could feel calm and focused in the OR. Lucy knew she was fortunate—she couldn't recall any student, or newly graduated Intern for that matter, working on as many different cases, or assisting on as many surgeries as she had.

She'd done about fifty with Elizabeth, ten with Anspaugh, one with Dorset, Three with Peter, and about sixty with the man who'd saved her life—the man she owed so much.

Morgenstern finished his task and looked at her expectantly. She nodded her readiness, her heart in her stomach and butterflies in her brain, but she knew she needed to focus. She didn't want her first surgery with Morgenstern to be compromised because she was hesitant. She took a deep breath, and they entered the sterilized room.

Shirley shared a look with the young woman but kept her thoughts to herself as she helped the veteran and the novice suit up and handed the scalpel to Morgenstern who noted the time and made the first incision while Lucy picked up her forceps and Metz and tried not to not throw up.

—

She rubbed her eyes at Admit, filing charts, wishing her shift would end. She wanted his arms around her, holding her together after Fossen, the fight, and the rest of a shift that hadn't gotten any better.

Abby saw her and headed over. "You alright?"

"Yeah, just waiting for my shift to end in 27 minutes." Lucy glanced at her watch and laughed, but it was fake, and Abby noticed.

"Lucky. When I got called in, I didn't think that meant I'd have to work a double. My ER shift is almost over, and then I get to get back to being Nurse Lockhart." She snorted and made a face. Lucy made the same face and shook her head.

"Yeah, well nobody expected Dr. Romano to go rouge." Lucy replied with a sadness in her voice but she had no idea where it'd come from.

"Edson deserved it. He was antagonizing him all night, but I can't believe he said that about Elizabeth." Abby crossed her arms, and looked at her feet, feeling a little guilty for thinking Romano was always a foul bastard, but after Fossen, and after the surgery she'd assisted on, she was beginning to see what was underneath his hard shell, especially after Laura Shayatovich—after Adele. It should've been her Derek went after, not the wonderful social worker. She and Mark had put Ben into protective custody in the first place, but Robert had signed the order, and had unknowingly signed thirteen people's death warrants, well fourteen if she counted the shooter, but Abby didn't. She had no sympathy for him, only hatred and rage.

"I know. I think I would've punched him, but he beat me to it." Lucy brought her out of her head, and Abby signed up for another patient as Lucy took a sip of coffee and handed her Hannah's chart. "Hannah Abbott. Her mom's still in surgery. Dad died about an hour ago. Carter's nursing a splenic and pancreatic lac."

Abby shot daggers at her best friend.

"Why do I have to take it? Does she really need three doctors?"

"Well, it'll only be one in about twenty-five minutes. Carter's still on for another few hours, and you'll be back to being a real superhero soon." This time Lucy laughed a real laugh, and Abby couldn't help but laugh too, their only moment of peace after the longest day they'd ever had at County—well maybe the second after the day of the stabbing, but neither of them liked to think about it.

"Have you seen, Luka? I needed to talk to him."

"Trouble in paradise?"

"No, I just wanted to tell him not to wait up for me."

"I think he went home."

"Ahh, man. Okay. Hey, Carter's asleep in the Suture Room." Abby winked at her and then picked up the phone.

—

Carter grunted and rolled onto his other side when she flipped on the light.

"Why in God's name would you do that, Luce?" He asked when he heard the familiar laugh, knowing it was her who had found him because he'd only told Abby where he was so he wouldn't be disturbed.

"It's fun watching you squirm. And I missed you, and I wanted to tell you that I think it's a wonderful idea."

He sat up and rubbed his eyes, swinging his legs over the side of the bed so she could join him. "What?"

"I would love to marry you on Valentine's Day." She told him as she sat down, remembering how he'd asked her before the rampage had taken over. She was shocked, telling him how idiotic his idea was, and John had held up his hands in surrender as if to say that she'd won. But after Fossen, she didn't want to wait to marry her best friend who looked adorable with his messy hair and half-asleep eyes.

"Are you sure? We don't have to, Luce. It was just an idea." His voice was slightly slurred from his sleep, but mostly held uncertainty and longing.

She kissed him passionately. "I'm sure." She smiled at him for a few seconds, before pushing him down onto the bed, and covering him up. She kissed his forehead and turned off the light, letting him get some much-needed rest.

—

Lucy glanced at her from the doorway of Curtain Area Two and gave a small smile at the sleeping blonde. It was her, twenty years younger, except she had a stuffed elephant, not cow. Children were always hard for her to treat because of their innocence, but they also brought her the mist joy because of that very thing—the way they just saw you as a wonderful person and not one full of flaws.

Her chest tightened, tears threatened to fall, but she pushed them away as she brushed a strand of hair away from closed eyes. Hannah would wake up an orphan, Lucy reckoned, remembering how hard they'd fought for her father, but it'd been in vain. She gulped at the memory of Morgenstern's hands and arms covered in blood along with hers, and as he called it, he tried to hide the emotion in his voice, and she tried to hide the fact that a tear had fallen onto her cheek.

So, this is what he'd felt when Robert sat by her bedside almost 6 months ago, and Lucy could stand the fog in her brain no longer.

She walked out the door, and headed towards the elevators, needing to find Elizabeth and figure out what the hell was going on.

—

Elizabeth sighed as Jayce untied her gown, and she walked out of OR 3, Peter following behind her, throwing his surgical mask into the bin. Shirley sat at the desk, noticing the long faces of her friends, and she stood and wiped the Abbott's names off the board, and held out the chart.

Elizabeth mechanically filled it out, wanting to be safe in her bed, and then she remembered their fight earlier. She signed her name with heavy hand, the ink pressing through to the next sheet and then she threw it down, heading off to the Lounge.

The elevator dinged open, and Lucy stepped off, seeing the ocean of curls racing past her, and she followed.

"Elizabeth, wait!" she called after her, but her British friend didn't stop. She needed to get out or she'd scream.

Banging through the door of the Lounge after her, Elizabeth turned on her. "What?! I'm a little busy right now, so if this about a patient, get Benton."

Lucy's face fell, but she held her ground as she saw her companion's shoulder's slump. "This isn't about a patient. This is about you. How are you doing?"

"Just bloody wonderful," she replied sarcastically as she couldn't hold herself together anymore and began to sob.

"I heard about the fight. Wanna talk about it?" she tried gently as she held out a tissue for the woman she admired, and sat down across from her.

"Not particularity. I don't know what I did to get Robert to hate me so much. I thought everything was going wonderfully. I guess not," she blew her nose as she continued, "all over an Aortic Fistula. Of all the dumb things to row about."

Lucy moved over to where she was sitting, and rubbed her back. "I'm sure he was just stressed about Fossen, which is not an excuse for his outrageous behavior, but he was going through a lot."

Elizabeth's head peaked at this, curious as to what a happened earlier.

"He lost a patient he spent about thirty minutes working on."

"Oh God," she sighed, starting to understand why Robert was so upset. He'd never lost anyone he'd worked on, and Elizabeth stared at Lucy for a few minutes, unable to say anything. How was it what he'd saved her blue-eyed best friend when the odds were worse than impossible, but he couldn't save a simple GSW? Sure, she believed in miracles, and Lucy was one of them, but was some Higher Power punishing the man she loved? And for what? How long had he been carrying whatever was burdening him?

"Then Kerry blew up at him about Dr. Legaspi; Adele was shot."

Elizabeth rolled her eyes when Lucy mentioned Kerry Weaver, certain her only job in life was to make both of theirs—hell everyone's life at County—harder. She hiccuped and tried to focus on her calming touch on her back, but her voice gave her away as her heart kept breaking. "Adele was shot? What happened? Is she okay?"

"Fossen found her at her house and shot her in the back. Dr. Romano was supposed to do her surgery, and then Dave's patient crashed, so Peter did the surgery. She's still recovering, but she hasn't regained sensation from the waist down, so she'll probably never walk again."

She shook her head, gasping in disbelief. She liked the warm-hearted Social worker and felt sorry for what happened to her. Guilt washed over her—if she hadn't been nursing a splenic lac, Robert could've operated on Adele, and she might be able to feel her legs.

Lucy noticed her recede into herself, seeing the guilt wash over her face. "Don't do that, Elizabeth. He could've done the surgery, and she could still be in the same boat. What happened to Adele didn't happened because you were treating another patient who ultimately turned critical."

"But I don't understand why he took it out on me? We've had bad days before and he's never acted like a five-year-old," Lucy gave her look, and she laughed weakly, "well, not all the time."

"Fossen murdered thirteen people, and then with Dale—"

"Wait, what are you talking about? Dale doesn't work here anymore, he doesn't have a license."

Lucy filled her in about Robert's confrontation with the Weasel—about how he had kept provoking him until he snapped.

"Where's Robert?"

"I imagine he's at home, nursing his pride and his eye. He had a nasty shiner. Anspaugh said he'll probably be suspended for a few days."

"Suspended for what?"

"He punched Dale, although, I don't blame him. I'd have punched him too."

Elizabeth's eyebrows shot up in both curiosity and horror, but her eyes demanded answers.

"Dale called you, well he called you, a uhhh.." she trailed off, hoping Elizabeth would figure out what she was trying to say.

"That foul git. Why didn't anyone get me? I would've liked to see him wipe that narcissistic smile off his face." the curly-haired woman raged, stunned and pissed at the revelation that The Weasel would call her such a horrible thing, and she wanted to punch his lights out herself.

"You were in surgery. Besides, I'm sure he wouldn't have wanted you to see him like that. I'm sure he feels awful."

"I don't what to do, Lucy. How are we ever going to be okay after this?"

"We never know what's gonna happen in life, but there are things that are certain, and we should hold onto those things." She told her, remembering Hannah and how she'd be waking up an orphan.

"Are you sure you want to be a surgeon? I'm sure Deradd wasn't happy at your choice to join us on the dark side."

Lucy grinned and bit her lip. "Well I don't think Dr. Romano's heart could take it if I worked in Psych, now would it?"

"He would've moped for months, but eventually come around. You know, he cares for you very much."

"I care for him too. I mean, I owe him so much after what he did for me. But he wouldn't be whole without you. I've seen the way he looks at you—it's the same way Carter looks at me. He worships the ground you walk on, Elizabeth. Don't give that up over one stupid schmuck who doesn't have two brain cells."

"Besides, I'm going to need a maid of honor, and I don't know how Robert would look in a dress." Both women couldn't contain their laughter as Lucy stood and headed towards the door. Her pager beeped, and her face turned into a frown.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm sorry, I have to go. My patient's critical."

"Hey, Lucy, Thanks." Elizabeth called after her, a small smile plastering her lips. She reckoned she should at least let Robert try and explain himself, and what of his eye? Was it really as swollen as she'd heard? Revenge might be fun, she thought to herself as she headed down to the ER for the consult she'd been paged for half an hour ago, but had chosen to ignore.

—

Elizabeth sighed as she took the key out of her pocket and stuck it in the lock. Her shift had long ended, and she wasn't sure what was waiting for her on the other side of the door. Robert could be in any kind of mood, and she wasn't even sure what she'd say to him. What was there to say, really? But of she didn't do something that would be even worse. They'd rowed before, and they'd always come out alright. Taking a deep breath, she turned over the lock.

The house was dark when she entered except for the glow of candlelight. Light tumbled from the foyer, and she hung up her coat in the closet and then opened the door to the rest of the house. She hadn't seen the Jag, but he could've parked in the garage.

Her things were by the door, neatly packed, each box labeled in his handwriting. Something caught her eye on top of the first box, and she picked it up.

The envelope bulged in her hand, and she opened it. Inside there was her passport, two round-trip airline tickets—one for anywhere she wanted to go in the States, and one for Heathrow, several thousand dollars in European currency and American money, and a roll of papers.

Disbelief covered her face. They were transfer papers, so that she could get a job both in the States or back in her beloved London.

She continued to read:

She is an exceptional surgeon who never fails to impress. I know that she will succeed if she so chooses to take this position, and she would be a hell of an asset. And I know talent when I see it.

—Dr. Robert Romano, Chief of Staff and Surgery, Cook County General Hospital, Chicago, Illinois.

So he just assumed she'd run away because of one bad fight? The old Elizabeth who would've run at the first sight of trouble didn't exist anymore thanks to him. Anger welled up inside of her for a brief second, but ten turned into despair. Was he rally feeling that low that he thought she would leave because of what he said?

She'd been called much worse. By so many bloody idiots—hell even by him a few times—but she had thick skin.

"Robert?" she called, but got no answer.

The house was uncommonly quiet. No sounds of life, not even the sound of Gretel snoring welcomed her.

"Robert?" she tried again as she moved into the living room.

More candles greeted her, and then her foot met something soft.

The table was smooshed against the wall, and a blanket laid in the middle of the floor. Italian food hit her nose, and her mouth watered. So he was here, just hiding, she laughed slightly.

Next to the wine there was a CD case, but none that she recognized. Thin print was written on it.

For my beloved Lizzie

She headed to the stereo and popped it in. She picked up the remote and pressed play.

She gasped in shock. Robert's voice flitted through the old speakers, singing all of her favorite songs. She poured herself a glass of wine, and continued to listen. After the songs she knew, one began, and she smiled, remembering the moment Robert showed up in her doorstep and sang to her. Is it Okay if I Call You Mine? Yes, Robert. Her heart ached, and she bit her lip, trying to stop the tears forming at the edges of her eyes.

Sometimes people, male promises they can't keep, but she wasn't one of them, and she'd meant what she said. It wasn't always easy but she didn't want to live without him. At least let him explain himself.

The Cd was blurring in her ears, and she yawned, the effects of the day finally hitting her. Her tired eyes dozed until his voice brought her back to the land of the living. She stood, stretched, and headed off don the hall in the direction of his voice.

Let me go
Gravity gets us all
Just thought you should know
In tomorrow's morning light
Things will look a lot less frightening
Than now, than now, than now..
Robert sang as he strummed, sitting crossed legged on his four-poster king-sized bed. Dressed in jeans and a simple navy t-shirt, his right eye swollen shut, and throbbing. The room was dark, with more candles surrounding him, and he tried to hide the trembling in his voice as he finished the first verse.

Elizabeth stood in the doorway, listening to the emotion pouring from him. She held onto the frame, sure she'd fall over from the feelings in the room. It wasn't any song she'd ever heard, but he did have a strange taste in music, she giggled out loud, covering her mouth, trying not to disrupt him.

His face changed shape at the thought of hearing her voice, but he shook it off, never once breaking his concentration.

Maybe, just maybe
We could rewrite history
Baby, I'm fading
Oh, I could use a little saving
Maybe you could forget what I said
And just hold me instead.

That was the truth, and he fumbled a few chords, biting his lip, and scratching out that combination on the yellow legal pad in front of him.

Without her his heart fumbled to beat, he fumbled to laugh, he fumbled to smile when she wasn't around. He knew that she'd be furious that he'd punched Edson, but then a moment of silence would pass before she'd bust out laughing and give him that smirk that made his heart beat a little faster, and made his cheeks flush to a cotton candy pink.

She moved over to the bed and sat down next to him, and listened as her heart was breaking. But she needed that closeness—the closeness that sent her running at first, but then she'd grown to love it—to crave it, to wrap herself around the strong grasp he had on her heart and life and never let it go.

So you let me go
I guess I understand
I was the one who told you to
And so the morning came, just to leave
And nothing was ever the same, the same, the same

He couldn't hold it in anymore, and he stopped the intricate dance his fingers were doing as a few tears ran down his face. His stomach turned, his eye giving him a headache. His lip quivered and his face grew red. Elizabeth bit her lip and reached for his free hand, and she squeezed it. He squeezed back, holding on for dear life.

Somehow he found the courage to finish the song, realizing she was next to him.
Maybe, just maybe
We could rewrite history
Baby, I'm fading
Oh, I could use a little saving
Maybe you could forget what I said
And just hold me instead
Just hold me instead
Just hold me instead, oh

Maybe, just maybe
We could rewrite history
Baby, I'm fading
Oh, I could use a little saving
Maybe you could forget what I said
And just hold me instead
Instead

He put down the guitar, leveling his voice before he whispered in the silence.

"Elizabeth, I—" he tried to get the words out, but she leapt at him, wrapping her arms around him, crushing him to her chest.

"I'm so sorry. Please, forgive me. I won't stop you from leaving but I promise to send everyday of the rest of my life making it up to you." He repeated over and over again into her hair, squeezing her tight.

"Robert, shhhh. We'll talk about this later." She soothed as she pulled away to look at him—his face blotchy and the right side swollen beyond normal, giving him a slightly gruesome look, but he was still sort of handsome.

"Why are you sitting in the dark?"

"Power's out." He sniffled, as he gathered himself stood, putting the guitar on it's stand.

"Oh, really, I thought it was your attempt at making it up to me," she joked, her voice light, but not quite the same as it usually was when they were teasing.

"I'll have you know I lit the candles before the power went out. Why do you think I cooked up a right feast in the other room. I wasn't about to let several hundred dollars worth of food go to waste. Look at it this way:hell of a lot better than Cafeteria food. Maybe this is Divine Intervention." He chuckled, feeling a little better.

"You don't believe in Divine Intervention."

"At this point, I'd believe in Leprechauns chasing pots of gold. Lizzie, may I have dinner with you?" he wondered as he shuffled his feet. He'd never been good with this whole apology thing.

She made a face. "Isn't that kind of a given. Unless you're trying to insinuate that I eat like a rhinoceros."

"A horse, but you know, I think it is rather sexy. A woman with an appetite, what a concept. You are a rare gem, Lizzie, one worthy of a good man."

"You are a good man. Anybody else would've punched Edson for selfish reasons, but you were protecting my honor. How very noble of you."

"Well, you are my English Rose, and I love keeping you around. Brightens up the whole house really."

"And your wrinkled face."

"Take that back right now. Romano's have great skin." he pouted while looking in the mirror, checking for the dreaded monster called aging.

"Oh, really?"

"No. Once again, you're bullshit meter is in tip-top shape."

"I've learned a thing or two from the master it would seem. Now, can we dig into that wonderful food in the living room? I haven't eaten since this afternoon." She checked her watch, and groaned. It was now two in the morning.

He nodded, and they headed into the other room.

—

Lucy punched out, and gathered her things before checking on Hannah one last time. John slept beside the young girl, and Lucy smiled at how cute he was, and excitement bubbled in her belly. She couldn't wait to marry him, and she wished Valentine's Day was right around the corner, but it would be here before she could blink.

Lost in her thoughts of the future, she headed down the hall towards the Ambulance Bay, passing the black eyes that'd changed her world forever, and he glanced at her with sadness on hos face, but he made no attempt to go after her.

Abby held onto him, and Susan watched the blonde practically skip down the hall.

"Are you serious?" Abby questioned the Attending, her hand wet from his soaked frame.

"He is our Good Samaritan. Hannah Abbot is alive because he carried her in here." Susan sighed, unsure what to do. She made a note to find Mark—he'd know what to know, he always did.

Lucy never looked up, and she walked out of the hospital, opening her umbrella. The unrelenting rain hadn't stopped.

—

Robert and Elizabeth finished a bottle of wine, and filled their bellies with the warm food as the soft music continued, and Robert's voice filled the room.

"Where's Gretel?"

"Staying with my sister for the night. She's not good with dark, and my sister lives on the other side of town where they have power."

"I wrote most of those songs you know?" he pointed to the stereo.

"Really? And the song earlier?"

"Yeah. That one i just finished but I've been working on for a long time. I thought it might be a good way to start healing, but then i screwed it up with you so i decided to finish it. Catharsis or something like that."

"How many instruments do you play?"

Robert laughed. "Only two. Guitar and that bad boy over there," he pointed to the piano. "Otherwise it'd be a hell of a decoration."

"I have the musical ability of a rock," she giggled, remembering the Halloween night when Peter had made fun of her for singing the Shaft theme song off key and out of time, but she had fun nonetheless, playing her air tambourine with style.

"Did i ever tell you i was in a band?"

"New Kids in the Block or a jazz group?"

"You wound me, deeply. Try rock'n roll. A hair band type, you know like Def Leppard or Poison."

"Didn't they have hair in those bands?"

"I had a ponytail until i was about twenty-five."

"I'd love to see that."

"I might have a picture around somewhere." he replied through gritted teeth as the pain shot through his head, his eye throbbing worse than earlier. She noticed the pain covering his face, and stood up, heading into the kitchen.

He laid back on the blanket, while she was fiddling around in the kitchen. She returned holding an ice pack.

"I didn't want the ice to go to waste."

"How thoughtful of you." He winced when she pressed it to his eye, but he smiled at her, and she returned it.

"I'm sorry, Elizabeth. Truly." His voice was low, but full of sincerity and regret.

"I know."

"This a peace offering?"

"Maybe."

"Well, would it help if I told you I love you?"

"Yes. And taking me to The Nutcracker."

"What?"

"That's how you can make it up to me. It was my favorite ballet as a child but I never got to go because my parents wouldn't stop fighting long enough. You'll have lots of time now that you've been suspended."

"I'll probably be canned. Although I deserve it. How am I supposed to stay after this?"

"I imagine there will be a formal investigation but I'm sure you'll be fine."

"I don't want it if I can't have you."

"I haven't let yet. And I wont. I promised you Robert. And I'm keeping that promise."

"You're the only one who's ever kept their promises to me."

"You always keep yours to me."

The box in his pocket tugged at him, but he knew the moment had passed. He was going to do it—take the next step with her—until Fossen threw a bullet in the middle of the plan. Now, he'd have to wait for the right moment but he'd waited his entire life for her, so what was a little bit more time. The wheels started turning, and then it came to him, and he grinned. It was Tuesday, well Wednesday now, and it was Halloween, but no one felt like playing dress up.

"Well, you're the only one who's ever been worth it."

"Here's looking at you kid," she replied, recalling the one of their earlier dates. They'd seen Casablanca in double feature—the first time through in English then the double feature in French. Her favorite movie, her favorite restaurant, her favorite guy. The night couldn't have been anymore perfect until Robert had made a bold declaration.

"I'm gonna marry you."

"That's a little bold of you isn't it, Rocket? I mean, we've only just met."

"They don't call me Rocket for nothing, and besides, we've already kissed. We have a history of doing things backwards, Lizzie."

They did have a history of doing things the hard way, and Lizzie decided to stop and just let if flow naturally the way it always did when they were together.

Jeanine gave her the advice today after she'd headed back to the ER. She'd told her to just enjoy the moments. She told her about the time Peter had behaved that way toward her ex-husband, Al, who accused her of giving him the HIV, and they were madly in love. She told her curly haired friend about forgiveness, and how people are irrational when they love you, but that both Peter and Robert had had good intentions, and that's what separated them from other men who were jerks. Men like Edson who saw women as trophy's to fill his every whim, as opposed to seeing them as gifts to be cherished.

"I love you, you know that?" he played with her hair as she smirked at her.

"I love you too. Care to help me unpack?" she smiled, rubbing his cheek and grinning.

He nodded, kissing her as he made a silent promise to rewrite their history.