"The road outside my house is paved with good intentions
Hired a construction crew, 'cause it's hell on the engine"
Blowing through the doors to Hollywood Arts, I grin against the grain of Jade's scowl. For something that was supposed to be so hard, coming to school with Jade has been easier than I ever thought it would be. Even when questioning glances multiply and mutate into lingering looks, my enthusiasm doesn't wane.
Nobody ever really liked me before, barring my small circle of friends. If the faceless masses of Hollywood Arts want to question the best thing that's probably ever happened to me, I couldn't care less.
"You called me your boyfriend." I coo, practically floating through the hall with Jade at my side. I'm expecting a laugh, a jab in the ribs, anything. When I flick my gaze to Jade, what little color had been on her cheeks has drained away. Jade fidgets, and then she's ripping her hand away from me. When Jade's eyebrows crash over her eyes and she tenses up, I tumble back to earth.
"No, Robbie. I didn't." Jade hisses, shaking her head and jabbing her index finger into my chest for emphasis. I shrink backwards, trying to fight the frown from my lips. Jade's voice clatters to a halt, and I shake my head adamantly. I'm silent for a long painful moment, trying to will the right words to my lips. It's awkward, and Jade scuffs the ground, seemingly waiting for me to speak. She's staying at least, I think that's that's a good sign.
"You did too…I mean, I heard it…you're freaking-what's wrong?" I spew forth a tangled web of words that just barely clatter forth in the form of a sentence. Jade presses her mouth into a thin unhappy line and drags a rattling breath through her lips. When her eyes sweep over me, I wonder which gears are turning inside of Jade's head. Her irises have blown wide open, and deep within their inky depths, I can see the girl from yesterday being hauled away in chains.
"Shapiro, just leave it." She sighs, scuffing the ground with her heavy boots and glaring at the ground. Her raven hair is dangling over Jade's eyes, and I can't help but feel that there's a battle raging inside of her head.
"Jade, what's the problem?" I ask, taking a step towards her and hanging an arm over her shoulder. It's enough to drag Jade's gaze away from the ground, but she doesn't smile. In fact, when her eyes drop to my fingers, her frown only deepens. Jade's hands are hanging limply at her side, but it feels like they're strangling the life from me with every passing silent second. Jade glances at me, and then at a couple walking past us. Screwing her eyes shut, Jade's nose crinkles as she grimaces. If my heart wasn't tearing at the seems, I'd even remark on how beautiful that crease in her skin is.
"Look. Believe it or not, I like you Shapiro. I just don't want to date you, okay?" Jade's tone wavers, and it's like the words coming from her mouth aren't exactly the ones she'd picked out in her mind. Then again, maybe they are. I don't know. The seams in my heart have come undone, and there's too much chaos in my chest to really stop and inspect the subtleties in Jade's statement.
"Don't look so down, we're having fun aren't we?" Jade's lips flinch, as she tries to conjure a smile forth. It flickers away and dies as I narrow my eyes in her direction. The pain inside of my chest has begun to fester, and the bitterness emanating from my heart's rotting carcass has begun to infect my thoughts.
"I gotta go, Jade." I state lifelessly, shifting my bag to my other shoulder and spinning decisively on my heel. As I march away, I'm not entirely sure what I'm in search of. I really just want to get away from Jade before hateful things that I won't be able to take back spill over my lips.
"Shap…fine, leave." Jade's voice curls around my shoulders and I almost turn back. Clenching my jaw, I force myself to keep walking. I shoulder through the crowded halls, and for once I'm not the one ducking against the wall to avoid people. It doesn't really matter though. It's a dubious achievement at best to be the raging bull people are avoiding.
When the bell for class screeches to life like an air raid siren, my breath is still coming to me in choppy waves. Staring blankly at the door in front of me, I realize that by some miracle fluke, I'm lingering in the right place for my Advanced Production class. Palming the door open, I lumber forth and trudge in the direction of my usual seat. Tumbling onto the hard plastic, my heart give a tight squeeze when I catch sight of a raven hair girl three seats in front of me. I know it's not Jade because she passed this class last semester, but it's still a painful reminder of my failings.
Students begin to filter through the rows, familiar faces filling their usual seats. Several of them cast fleeting glances in my direction, so I drop my arms onto the desk into front of me. Maybe if I bury my nose far enough into the crook of my elbow, I can chase away the ache that's settled so deeply into my chest. I'm not sure how long it is before I feel somebodies finger jabbing my arm.
"Hey there, Mr. Relationship Guy." Tori chirps, flopping onto the seat beside me. Her sunny disposition is utterly at odds with the storm of emotions raging inside of me. Even still, when Tori's eyebrows arc and begin to flail above her eyes, a smile fights its way onto my lips for a moment.
"Actually, it's Mr. We're Just Having Fun Guy." The words burst out before I know what I'm doing, and the levity in the air goes down in flames. Tori's dancing eyebrow crumble to a halt, and she blinks with a start. Seeing the concern working it's way onto her face, I try and arc my lips into a smile.
That doesn't go so well.
"What'd Jade do?" Tori squawks, all of a sudden. Judging by the way her eyes are narrowing, I can tell Tori thinks my smile isn't up to scratch. This semester, in a class where it's only the two of us surrounded by shruggers, we've bonded just a little bit. The tutor thunders past us, late us usual, but Tori's eyes remain fixed on me. Gnawing at the inside of my lip, I realize that today is going to be one of those days where Tori relentlessly burrows to the root of my problem.
"Nothing, nothing." I splutter, each syllable more unconvincing than the last. Tori's frowning still, and a tell tale crease appears between her eyebrows. It's the same expression she wears every time I try to evade her questions.
"Clearly it was more than nothing." She hisses, leaning towards me. Her chestnut hair spills over her shoulders, just as it usually does during this same song and dance. Tapping my fingers on the desk, I realize that she's already learnt the steps over the course of the semester. I'm cornered, too. It's only a matter of time before I'm spilling my guts out to Tori like usual.
"Okay class, I'm going to need absolute silence for this demonstration…" When Mr Robinson's lilting voice cuts between us, I almost want to tent my hands and give thanks to the universe. On a day like today, I'm grateful for the small mercies. Jabbing my index finger in Mr. Robinson's direction, I ignore the look on Tori's face. It scatters between irritation and concern, before she twists her lips and turns to the front of the classroom.
Mr. Robinson drags us all into the Black Box Theatre and demonstrates how to use a dolly for tracking shots. The information soaks into my mind almost immediately, so I spend the last twenty minutes stewing over Jade and plotting my escape from Tori. After what feels like an eternity trapped in purgatory, the bell finally rattles to life. It's still jangling when I dart towards the exit. I'm only step away from freedom when a strong hand reaches out and I grind to a halt.
"Now, now Robbie. I know you're top of the class this semester, but hold your horses for a few more minutes." Mr Robinson drawls, shaking his head amid greasy tresses of amber hair.
"Hold your horses, nyah, nyah, nyah." I growl lifting my pitch to match Mr Robinson's voice. From beside me, an ungraceful snort erupts from Tori.
Blinking with a start, my eyes scatter away from Mr Robinson and towards the carnage beside me. From the looks of it, Tori had been taking a sip of water at the moment my mocking tone had hit the air. When I turn to her, she's cradling her water bottle, while sheepishly wiping water from her chin. My mood lifts out of the doldrums it's been trapped in for the past hour, and a smirk drags my lips upwards. Yelping indignantly, Tori's slender fingers batter my shoulder with all of the force of an unruly kitten. With a lopsided smile on my face, I'm sarcastically rubbing my injured arm when the sound of a throat being cleared cuts between us.
"Alright! That's quite enough, Mr. Shapiro, Miss Vega. Since you're both much too busy to listen, the two of you will be paired up for this assignment. You'll also be handling the cinematography for the most demanding, particular, and downright difficult to work with director at Hollywood Arts…" As Mr Robinson's rant spirals towards a point, I swallow nervously, realizing how horrible the conclusion is going to be.
"Uh oh…" I squeak, ripping Tori's eyes from Mr Robinson for an instant. In an instant, she tumbles onto the same realization that I have, and I watch on as Tori's eyebrows make a break for the top of her head.
"Jade West." Tori yelps, like Jade's name has caused her physical pain. I just rake my hands through my hair and try not to think about it. Wordlessly, I yank a script from Mr Robinson's outstretched hand and stalk back in the direction of my bag. Gnarling my fingers around it, I lug it over my shoulder and finally break through the door that's been calling me for so long.
The satisfaction of solitude only lingers for a moment before Tori's diving after me. As she falls into step beside me, I realize things are only going to get worse before they get better. Planning a project of this magnitude means long nights slaving over a planning book with Tori, and even longer days trying to make Jade agree with our vision.
"Oh, this is bad." I mumble burying my head in my hands.
"Come on, it's not that bad." Tori retorts, lips curling as she takes offense to the implications of my words. Knowing what's about to come, I want to try and infuse at least a modicum of positivity into our conversation. When I open my lips, nothing but negativity pours out.
"No, trust me this is really, really, really, rea-" When I feel fingernails ding into my shoulder, I almost jump out of my skin.
"Oh hey. Not interrupting anything, am I?" Jade's words slice through the air, menace trailing in their wake. Whatever sense of purpose that had laced my movements leaks away when our eyes meet. Jade's eyes are clouded, and the way her jaw is set reminds me of the person she was before this weekend. When she retracts her fingers, Jade keeps her arms tucked tightly against her body as we begin to move again. I realize that I'm not the only one that's been wounded by this morning. Jade's defences are just a lot more powerful than mine.
"Well Robbie was just about to say really for the 36th time. So-" Tori's innocent attempt at lightening the mood dies on her lips her Jade's glare drifts away from me.
"Wasn't talking to you Vega." Jade hisses, through her clenched jaw. When her angry gaze resettles on me, my lips have curled in disdain. The sound of her voice, so sweet only hour ago, has soured.
"Oh, you were talking to me?" I sneer, and it hits Jade hard. Her hardened front falters, and her eyes flicker away from me for a moment. I'm dimly aware of Tori edging away from us, and honestly I don't blame her. I'm toxic right now.
"Uh, yeah…" Jade admits, smoothing out an imaginary crease in her jeans. My throat tightens when I catch sight of the real Jade. She flashes before me for an instant when Jade's arm flickers towards me. But then she's retracting it again as doubts cloud her judgement, the extended limb never even coming near me.
"We're just having a good time. You like a good time, don't you Jade?" I ask, hurling her words from this morning right back at her. Venom stains my lips, and I hate the taste, but a broken heart has a way of poisoning somebody's words and clouding their thoughts. From moment to moment, I can't decide whether I hate Jade or if the inverse is true.
"Not with Vega." Jade's words rip through me as her defences engage for round two. She's used this tone on me before, but not for a few days. I don't remember it hurting so much.
"Oh, that's too bad. We're going to be having a whole mess of good times working on the cinematography for your film this semester. All three of us, it's going to be a riot." I inform her, dragging up harsh laughter. It tastes like bile, and I wind up hating myself more than Jade when I finally shut up.
"Oh." Jade states, eyes flicking to the ground. I wish she'd have barked it out like usual. When she's so close to being silent, she sounds too broken. I'm the one that's meant to be the one getting crushed under her foot. It's not supposed to be this way.
"Well, you know what Shapiro, I've got things to do. I gotta…go. I'll see you at your car after school…" Jade shoulders past me, but it's the last slither of resistance she'd had left. Watching as Jade disappears up the hallway, her shoulders hang limply, and she cuts a solitary figure. A painful lump carves its way up my throat and I do the only thing that I can. I turn to Tori and force my lips upright.
"Robbie, what was that?" Tori asks, nose crinkling as she lashes out and shoves me. Her eyebrows have carved concern into her features, and I realize she's not truly angry, just frustrated. I know the feeling.
"Hell." I remark simply.
Just when I thought this story was dying, ideas started coming at me left and right. Sorry everything had to go to hell for them to happen.
Review and stuff, that's what motivated me to start on this new story arc :)