A/N: New chapter! Yay!
"We're just happy that you're back," Miranda said as she pulled Elena into an overbearing hug and squeezed her entirely too tight.
"Miranda, we don't want to overwhelm her," Grayson said, trying to intervene.
Elena was standing in her living room surrounded by people she loved and knew, along with a few people from town who were friends with her parents. There were about five FBI agents stationed outside her house. Caroline had been hesitant to call this a welcome home party because those kinds of things were usually reserved for when someone came back from a vacation or a leisurely trip so she was simply referring to this as "a small gathering of friends and family". Which is essentially what a lot of people called funerals nowadays, but Elena didn't want to burst her bubble.
Elena stifled a yawn and sipped on a mug of coffee. It didn't matter that the sun had set by this point in the evening. If she had to be her charming and entertaining self, she needed the caffeine.
After Agent Foster dropped them off at home yesterday evening, Elena had gotten Addie ready for bedtime and then immediately passed out in the princess bed with her. She didn't realize how exhausted she was until she laid down to read Addie a bedtime story. The next thing she knew, she'd woken up from a nightmare at three in the morning with Addie cuddled into a little ball next to her. Needless to say, she hadn't really slept a lot.
The morning that followed had been hectic. Her parents were knocking at her door by 8am, anxious to wrap their arms around her. Her overprotective little brother, Jeremy, drove back from college just to make sure she was safe. When she explained to him that she had FBI agents watching over her constantly and that she was fine, he insisted on spending the night with her anyways.
Caroline rang her doorbell at noon, her arms full of grocery bags with a plan to have a small gathering to celebrate her safe return. Bonnie showed up a little later with beers in hand and Enzo in tow. She'd be sure to ask what that was all about at a later time. Finally Matt and Tyler came by around six and even though Tyler was still healing, he managed to throw a few jokes around at Caroline's expense.
Damon was noticeably absent. In fact, she hadn't heard from him since the airport and part of her was starting to think that he maybe resented her for asking him to give in to Klaus' demands. She'd imagined that he'd be waiting on her doorstep when she got home from the FBI office, but that simply wasn't the case. And now he was a no-show to the gathering. Caroline said she'd told Stefan to invite him, but the Salvatores weren't there.
Elena's hand clutched the coffee mug like it was her lifeline. After about an hour of everyone tiptoeing around what happened and trying to entertain her with small talk, she couldn't take it anymore. She took a sip from her mug. "I think I'm planning on reopening the garage in a couple of days," she told her father.
"Oh sweetheart, don't you think that's too soon?" Miranda interjected in her ever-caring tone. "You just got home. You should settle back in first."
"I think getting back to business as usual is the best thing for me right now," Elena countered. "And besides, I need the money. Matt, Tyler, and Bonnie do too."
"Stop worrying about me!" Bonnie said as she clinked her beer bottle with Elena's mug. "I've got money saved up. We'll reopen when you're ready."
"Well I'm ready now. I just want to get underneath a car," Elena said. "My hands are restless."
The sound of Addie's joyous laughter could be heard over the chatter and low music in the house. Elena looked over to see that Matt was holding her in his arms. They were dancing along to the music in the middle of her kitchen and his busted lip didn't seem as noticeable as he smiled and twirled her around. Of all the things Matt missed when they were held captive, she thought that he probably missed Addie the most.
"We just don't want you to push yourself too hard too soon is all," Miranda said as she placed a hand on Elena's shoulder to get her attention back.
"I can run things for a little while at the garage, if needed," Grayson offered.
She shook her head. "No way, Dad. I couldn't ask you to do that."
"Well, the offer still stands."
Elena thanked him and gave Miranda another tight hug before venturing off into the kitchen. Matt was still holding Addie and the two of them twirled around to see her standing next to the counter. "Seems like you two are having fun," she smiled at them.
"Momma! Uncle Matt said that he'll get me a Susie Sings-a-lot for my birthday!" Addie exclaimed.
"Oh, he did?" Elena said, arching an eyebrow.
The little girl nodded her head with fervor. "Yep!"
"I cannot believe you'll be four next month," Elena said with a laugh. She held her hands out to grab Addie and her daughter practically lept into her arms from Matt's. "Don't assume you'll get everything you're asking for, okay? Susie Sings-a-lots are hard to come by these days and I don't want you to be sad if we can't find one."
"I brought it up. We've been planning her birthday party," Matt defended as he grabbed a can of soda from the fridge.
Addie chimed in excitedly. "I want a bouncy house!"
"I bet you do," Elena replied. "Knowing our luck, you'd break your ankle in that thing."
"Please, Momma? Please?" She jutted her bottom lip out and the sight melted Elena's heart.
"I'll see what I can do."
Addie cheered out loudly and then hopped out Elena's arms to go find her Uncle Jeremy. As her little feet pitter-pattered across the linoleum of the kitchen floor, Elena called after her to tell her to stop running in the house. Of course, her stubborn little girl barely listened.
The Salvatore brothers sat next to each other on barstools as Bree refilled their rocks glasses with Wild Turkey. Usually Damon would have invited Alaric along to help him drown his sorrows in bourbon, but he figured he owed the man a break. Alaric had been babysitting him for the past week. It was time to let the man sleep.
In the interest of not drinking alone, Damon called Stefan. Fearing that Damon was still unspeakably angry with him, his baby brother was all too willing to meet him at the familiar dive bar. That's just how Stefan was, always willing to patch things up. It was kind of annoying how perfect he was.
"Good thing Rose was able to schmooze her way out of that press conference, huh?" Stefan asked him. "We all thought that was going to be a disaster and then she worked her magic."
"That's what I pay her the big bucks for," Damon said with a smirk. "Always covering my ass when I need it." He glanced down at his hand. The last scabs from his temper tantrum after Dish and Dine with Andie were finally healing over.
"So you're not mad at me anymore?" Stefan asked as he took a tentative sip of the liquor. This was already his third glass.
"You got her back, despite my own stupidity, so no," Damon answered. "I'm not mad at you. I am, however, curious as hell about how indebted I'll be to you know who after all of this."
"Dad spent a lot of money on that security team."
He scoffed. "And I'm sure he'll make sure I know about it."
Stefan pulled his buzzing phone from the pocket of his khakis and frowned at the screen. "Are you sure you don't want to go to Elena's house? Caroline keeps asking where we are."
"Stefan, I was going to walk away from everything. I was going to give up and she thinks I'm the one that saved her." Damon slammed the rest of his drink back and set the glass onto the bartop with a clang.
"Hey now, Damon Salvatore. Don't you go breaking my glassware," Bree said as she came over to refill his double Wild Turkey.
"Sorry, sweetness," he smiled at her, a smile that was a pathetic attempt to cover up his pain. "Rough week."
Bree nodded. "I know. I saw the news. Your girl's okay though?"
"Yeah, she's fine."
"Not that he would know," Stefan gritted out.
Damon snapped his head around to look at his younger brother. Shy and demure Stefan never said anything that would intentionally cause an argument and here he was trying his best attempt at showing tough love. "Excuse me, brother?"
"And that's my cue to be somewhere else," Bree said, scurrying off to tend to the other customers at the bar.
"You heard me," Stefan said, swigging on his glass.
"You know," Damon said, pointing a finger at Stefan. "I think I liked you better when you didn't drink."
Stefan ignored him and continued on. "She needs you, Damon. Now more than ever. Instead, you're busy here feeling sorry for yourself."
"She doesn't need me. She looked like she was bouncing back just fine." He stared at the contents of his tumbler and swished it around in circles. "Elena's stronger than me. She's going to be alright without me. Hell, she'll be better off without me."
"If you don't go over there, you'll regret it." He slapped a hand onto Damon's back in encouragement.
That was the straw that made Damon lash out. If he'd known that calling Stefan was going to result in a lecture, he would have just sat here alone instead. All the pain and anger and guilt he was holding onto unleashed in that moment. It was entirely misplaced on Stefan, but he just happened to be there. "You don't know anything about regret, brother. Your little charmed life doesn't allow for that so why don't you climb back in your Porsche that you bought with our father's money, call the nice girlfriend that I set you up with, and fuck her in the expensive silk sheets that you bought from the money you made off of me? Because I'm done getting advice from someone who's never had to work for anything in their fucking life."
Fire burned in Stefan's green eyes as he slid from his barstool. "You're a real asshole, Damon." He tossed some cash onto the car to cover his tab, grabbed his jacket, and stormed out.
"I guess even Saint Stefan reaches his limit every now and then," Damon shrugged to himself. He tipped the bottom of his glass towards the ceiling, trying to get the last couple drops out of the bottom. They dripped onto his tongue and the familiar burn was comforting. He held his empty glass up to get Bree's attention.
She walked over and stood across the bartop from him. When she reached for his hand to comfort him, he snatched it away.
"Oh, not you too," he drunkingly slurred. "I've had enough of the fucking advice and hovering and blah blah blah."
"I'm cutting you off, sweetheart," Bree said kindly. "You've had almost a whole bottle to yourself and you need to go home to sleep it off."
She didn't want to serve him anymore? Fine. He had plenty of liquor at home and at least there he didn't have to put up with anyone's mouth. He stood from the stool to take out his keys and stumbled a little when he tried to reach into the pocket of his black jeans for his wallet. He was so unfocused on what he was doing that his reflexes didn't fire when Bree snatched his keys from him. Swaying side to side, he held out his hand for them.
"I'm serious, Bree. Give me my keys."
"And be responsible for you wrapping that pretty blue car around a telephone pole?" she said as she tossed them next to the liquor display behind her. "Call someone to come get you."
He rolled his eyes as he dug out his phone from his leather jacket. He had a text from Elena asking if he was coming over and he typed out a misspelled response to her. Thank God for autocorrect in times of drunkenness.
At bar. Going home.
He started to scroll through to look for Rose's name. She was about the only person he hadn't pushed away yet so maybe she'd come get him if he asked really nicely. As his finger was about to dial her, he got another incoming text message from Elena.
Can you drive? Want me to come pick you up?
She was being entirely too helpful and entirely too nice to him. He didn't deserve her time or her kindness. He drafted a message telling her no, but she texted him again before he could send it.
Give me an excuse to get out of this house for a while. It's overwhelming.
He deleted what he'd written. If he could squash down his own guilt to make her feel better for a short period of time, then that's what he needed to do. If Alaric were here, he'd tell him to suck it up and be there for her. Damon wasn't sure he could do that, but he could at least try. He typed out a different reply and sent it.
Okay. I'm at Corner Bar.
He looked up at Bree, who was looking at him and twirling the keys to the Camaro around her index finger with a smile. "Someone's coming to get me," he grouchily said to her, holding out his hand for his keys.
"And I look forward to handing your keys over to whoever that is," she responded. She filled a pint glass with ice water and set it in front of where he was standing. "Now drink up."
Thankful for an excuse to get out of there, Elena excused herself from the conversation. She grabbed the keys to her CR-V and started to bundle herself up to go outside.
With her blue scarf tied securely around her neck and her coat zipped up high, she found Bonnie before she left. She was sitting in the corner of the living room laughing with Enzo about some inside joke. Since when did Bonnie Bennett have inside jokes with this guy? She quirked her eyebrow a little and Bonnie gave her a look that said she'd explain later.
"Do me a favor and get everyone out of here?" Elena asked her friend.
"Where are you dressed to escape to?" Bonnie responded, eyeing Elena's outfit.
"I'm going to see Damon. Jeremy's staying here tonight so he volunteered for babysitting duty."
"Is he sulking?" Enzo chimed in.
Bonnie elbowed him in the ribs. "None of your business," she whispered to him through clenched teeth.
Elena dug her hands into the back pocket of her jeans and rocked back on her heels. "I'm not sure. Kind of what I'm going to figure out. I haven't really heard from him since he met us at the airport."
"Well don't worry. We'll get the place cleared out and we'll make sure Jeremy gets Addie to bed at a decent hour." As if Bonnie could sense the uncomfortable tension in the air, the sense of unresolved thoughts and feelings, she clapped her hands together to get to work.
"Thank you," Elena gave her a hug and waved a goodbye to Enzo, who had to have been the coolest guy Bonnie had ever been interested in. She double checked everything with Miranda and Grayson, who were just as excited to spend time with Addie as they had been to see her. Before she made for the front door, she found Addie sitting at the dining room table with Matt and Tyler. They were playing Go Fish. She kissed her daughter on the cheek and gave a hug to both of her friends.
As she opened the front door, she was met with Stefan's grimace. His jaw was clenched and cold rain pelted behind him as he stood under the safety of her front stoop.
"He called you to come get him?" Stefan asked, looking surprised.
"I offered," Elena replied. "Why is that so unexpected?"
"No reason," Stefan said, softening his expression. "How are you doing, by the way? We were all really worried for you and Matt, still are to be honest."
Elena shifted awkwardly from one foot to the other. If she had a dollar for every time someone asked her if she was okay, she'd be able to open a second garage. "I'm fine," she lied through a heavy smile. "Caroline's inside if you're looking for her. I've got to get going."
"Right, of course." Stefan stepped aside to let Elena through and he made his way inside to find Caroline.
She slammed the front door of her house closed behind her. She stood for a moment under her front stoop, her arms crossed at her chest as she looked out at the rain drops. It was a short walk to get to her car, which was miraculously not blocked by all of the cars in the driveway.
A man in a suit stepped out of a black car parked along the street and raised an umbrella above his head. "Miss Gilbert, is everything okay?"
The FBI agents parked outside her house were yet another reminder that though she was home, things were not okay and they definitely were not back to normal. She took a breath. "I don't suppose there's any way you'd let me get in my car and not follow me?"
"Miss Gilbert, you're under federal protection for your own safety," he warned, stepping towards her so that she could hear him better.
"I'm aware."
"We can't protect you if we don't know where you are," he continued on.
"But I'm not being held captive? I can ask you not to follow me?" she countered, her legs shivering from the cold.
He nodded. "Technically yes, but –"
She sighed, interrupting him. "Can you all just stay here with my brother and my daughter? I'd feel better if they had as many people watching over them as possible."
The FBI agent looked back at the black car as if he was asking for permission from someone else. He turned back around. "We can do that."
"Thank you, Agent." Elena took long and quick steps to her car, climbing into the driver's seat. She backed out of her driveway and as she requested, she didn't see any headlights trailing behind her car. It may have been absolutely, positively stupid to forgo her FBI detail, but she just wanted to feel normal for a few hours. Was that too much to ask?
As she navigated the streets from the suburbs into downtown, she wondered just exactly which version of Damon she'd be walking in on. It was odd that he hadn't heard from him when he'd gone through so much to get her back. Maybe he really was upset at her for what she'd asked him to do. She couldn't blame him if he was. Or maybe it was something else entirely. She wasn't sure what exactly she'd be walking into.
All day her family and friends had been counting on her to reassure them that she was functioning just fine. They knew how strong she was and they were depending on her resilience. No one really knew what to do with an Elena who was broken. And yet that's how she felt. She felt totally and completely broken. Damon was the one person who she didn't have to hide that from. He'd promised to take care of her, in a way that she'd hadn't allowed anyone else to do before.
The dimly lit parking lot next to Corner Bar was almost full and she parked her car into the last open spot. She pulled the hood of her heavy coat over her head to shield her from the cold winter rain as her boots splashed in the puddles on the pavement. When she darted past Damon's Camaro on her way inside, she knew she was in the right place.
She pulled the weatherworn wooden door open by the handle and the smell of stale cigarettes mixed with beer nuts wafted through her nostrils. As she gazed around the full bar, she saw his raven hair. It was messy and looked like it hadn't been brushed in days. She neared the back of him, his shoulders slumped and his hand holding a glass of water that was mostly still full. Condensation on the glass told her he'd been holding it for a while.
"Fancy seeing you here," she said.
He slowly turned his head around and she was met with red, tired eyes. Had he slept at all since she was taken?
"Before you take me home, you should know that I was going to do it," he blurted out to her.
She took a couple steps closer to him and she could smell the bourbon oozing out of his pores. It didn't deter her from reaching out for him and she let her fingertips settle at the nape of his neck. She played lazily with the hair there, twisting it between her fingers. "What are you talking about?" she asked, searching his eyes for an answer.
"I was going to give in to Klaus' demands. I had it all planned out. I gave up, Elena. I'm not the kind of person you think I am." He hung his head low in shame, letting out a breath from deep in his lungs.
She laughed. She couldn't help it. She had to. Was that was this was all about? He thought she'd be disappointed that he wasn't strong enough? The sacrifice that he was willing to make for her showed more strength than she had in her right pinky. He would have left it all behind just to make sure she was safe. That was a love deeper than anything she'd ever expected out of this relationship. Elena stifled her laughter as Damon furrowed his eyebrows at her.
"Thank you for being willing to make that kind of sacrifice," she told him.
His brow furrowed even further. "You don't think I'm a coward for wanting to give up?"
"I think we were put into an impossible situation and you did the best thing you thought you could do." Then she admitted the thing that had been weighing on her since that Skype call. Her other hand lacing around his neck and pulling his forehead to press against hers, she whispered it so quietly that it was barely audible over the bar chatter surrounding them. "How would you feel if I told you that I wanted you to take the deal?"
He closed his eyes, his long lashes fluttering against his cheeks, and ghosted a kiss onto her cheek. "I don't blame you for that at all. You were scared and you have Addie to think about. I was the reason you were there in the first place, Elena. I'm so sorry."
"Shh. We're not placing blame on anyone but Klaus. At least that's what Matt keeps telling me," she interrupted his apology and despite the fact that he'd let her off the hook, the guilt still lingered there.
"So we're okay? You don't hate me?" he asked her.
She pulled away from him to look into his eyes. "Despite the fact that Klaus did everything in his power to drive us apart, that's the one thing he did not succeed at. Maybe I'm crazy, but you're not getting rid of me Damon Salvatore so stop trying."
A smile, a genuine smile pulled across his lips up to his tired eyes. "I love you too."
Bree jingled Damon's car keys in her hand, the sound snapping them out of their little bubble. "I take it you're his ride?" she said as she held them out to Elena.
"That's me," Elena said, grinning at her. She took the keys from her and extended her hand for a handshake. "I'm Elena Gilbert."
"Oh honey, I know. Your face is all over the news," Bree said as they shook hands. "But it's nice to meet you in person. You've got to be some kind of saint to put up with this one." She playfully thumped Damon on the back of the head.
"Thanks for cutting him off. I'm getting the sense that he can be a little self-destructive sometimes." She eyed Damon, who looked at her a little sheepishly, much like Addie when she was being scolded.
"A little," Bree answered.
Elena looked over to Damon. "Well drunky, are you ready to go home?" She tried to help him stand from the barstool, but the weight of his pure muscle held her down.
"I got it," he chuckled as he stood slowly, still a little wobbly from the alcohol. He turned around and waved a hand. "Goodbye to my favorite bartender."
"Bye, troublemaker," Bree smiled, shaking her head.
The two of them managed their way back into the parking lot. Thankfully, the rain had died down. Damon started to slosh his boots through the puddles to his car.
"Where do you think you're going?" she called after him as she walked towards the CR-V.
"Oh c'mon. We can't leave my car here overnight."
"Should have thought of that before you got so drunk that someone had to come get you," Elena lectured, sounding every bit as motherly as she actually was. "Get Alaric or someone to drive you to your car tomorrow."
Damon held up a mock salute in her direction and then changed directions towards Elena's car. "Yes ma'am."
Inside the safety of her car, she blasted the heat as much as she could. They were well into the winter weather and no amount of layered clothing could keep out the cold completely. Damon held his hands up to the vents to warm them as she drove the short distance to his house from the bar. They passed his training gym and the arena where she'd first laid eyes on him.
"I'm sure you're ready to get back to training," she said, looking over to him.
"Yes and no."
"Oh?" she fished, waiting for him to elaborate as she took a left at a stoplight.
"I'm going to have to pay the piper from Giuseppe. He may have helped get you back and I'm thankful for that, don't get me wrong, but it didn't come without a price. Truthfully when I was making plans to disappear, he was the one thing I was looking forward to running away from." Damon let his gaze fall outside the window at the passing street lights, but he reached to hold Elena's hand while they rode down the street.
"Are you still planning to fight Connor Jordan in a couple of weeks?" She could understand if he wanted to call this season a wash at this point. Missing a week in training put him loads behind the other fighters.
"It's still my title," he said, proudly. "But I have to earn it. I just don't know who I'll be fighting in the championship now."
She pulled up outside Damon's apartment building and put the car in park. "Home safe and sound."
"You want to come up for a little bit?" he asked her.
Elena thought about it. It's what she hoped he'd ask her all along. She needed to be held, to be comforted in only the way Damon could. The breakdown yesterday in the FBI office was what happened what she let her guard down and she couldn't do that again around anyone else but him. Looking at him now, she wasn't sure if he was up for much other than passing out face down in his bed.
"I could really use a decent night's sleep next to you," he said, squeezing her hand in his. That was all the convincing she needed.
She nodded and pulled into a parking space. They walked hand in hand up the stairs of his apartment building until they got to his door. Elena still had his keys in her purse so she dug them out and handed them over. He jabbed the house key into the lock and the glorious heat overwhelmed them as he pushed the door open.
With the door shut and locked behind them, Elena unwound her scarf from around her neck and shrugged out of her heavy jacket. She pushed up the sleeves of the baggy flannel she had on and plucked her rain boots off of her feet. When she finally looked up to see what Damon was doing, she saw him staring at her intently like she was the most prized possession in the whole world.
"So I said something and I'm not sure if it really sunk in," he began, kicking off his own boots and hanging his jacket on a hook on the wall. "You said it back under duress and I just want you to know that I meant it, but it's okay if you didn't."
"I know what I said," she interjected his babbling. "And I meant it too. I love you, Damon. I loved you before what happened and I still love you now."
They collided together, a mess of limbs and lips as they stripped each other out of their clothes right there in the living room. This wasn't the kind of comfort she had in mind and he hadn't been expecting anything like this from her right now. Despite that, it was what they both really needed.
Damon took her bottom lip between his teeth, his hands cupping her face. She moaned at the feeling, as her bare skin felt the heat radiating off of his. She'd gone from chilled to the bone to almost overheated in the span of minutes and it was all because of him and the way he touched her.
His hands made their way down the curves of her waist and hips until they came underneath her ass. With little effort, he lifted her off her feet and she wrapped her olive skinned legs around his waist to help hold on.
"Say it again," he commanded her.
She smiled at him as he carried her into his bedroom. "I love you."
He eased her down onto the bed. "Again."
This time she was more serious. She sat up and crawled her way down to the foot of the bed where he was standing in all of his naked glory. His erection was standing at full attention and his eyes were fixated on her cat-like movements. "Damon Salvatore, I love you."
"I love you too," he said with a smile.
He watched her lick her lips and then take him in her mouth with ease. It was damned near the sexiest thing he'd ever seen and despite the fact that he thought he might come immediately if he kept watching her, he couldn't take his eyes off her. She moaned as he felt the tip slide to the back of her throat, the small vibration causing his toes to curl and his breathing to speed up.
His heart was pounding in his chest and it wasn't just from the sensation of her mouth around his dick. It was more than that. She was his and he was hers and that's all there was to it. When he couldn't hold on anymore, he pulled himself away from her. Her lips were swollen and that fact was only accentuated by the pout that formed on them.
"I wasn't finished," she moped as she looked up at him with her chocolate eyes.
"If you kept going, I would have been," he replied, easing her down onto her back.
He covered her mouth with his, silencing any kind of sassy comeback she may have had brewing in her head. The kiss was hot and needy, the pressing need to be inside of her only growing deeper. They'd had sex many times before and each time had been perfect for it's own reasons. This time was different. This was about knowing that no matter what else was going on, things with them were rock solid because they loved each other.
Damon reached down between her legs and let his finger trace circles around her most sensitive spot. Her back arched from the bed and her mouth fell open. She was wet and ready for him and he couldn't hold himself back from having her any longer than he already had. He planted soft kisses along her neck and then he eased himself inside.
For Elena, this was more than just amazing sex. This was making love and it was something she hadn't shared with anyone ever, not even Liam. He rocked a slow and steady rhythm in and out of her, hitting that spot that he knew she loved each time. For the first time in a week and a half, her mind stopped racing and all she focused on was him.
"Oh shit, condom," Damon said, his eyes snapping wide open as he realized he'd forgotten it in his haste. He tried to pull out of her, but Elena wrapped her legs firmly around him to keep him there.
"It's fine. I've got an IUD and I trust you," she said with a smile. She'd gotten the Mirena right after Addie was born, determined to not have any more children with Liam or anyone else for a very long time. She normally was insistent on the extra protection of a condom anyways, just for disease purposes. But this was Damon, for crying out loud. If he even thought that he might have something, he'd never endanger her like that.
He nodded and then relaxed. She pulled him closer as he rolled his hips into her and the two of them lost themselves in each other and the way that they seemed to fit together so perfectly. When she finally detonated around him, her heels digging into his ass to keep him in as deeply as she could, he let go and fell over the cliff too.
After he could finally bring himself to pull out of her, he rolled onto his back and looked over at her. Her hair was a mess, her cheeks were flushed, but she looked gratified. She let out a sigh of content and started to make her way to the bathroom. Damon let his gaze linger on her ass as she walked to the door and when it closed behind her, he looked down at his already growing second erection.
"Down boy," he said, throwing the sheet over himself. He couldn't get too greedy.
Elena cracked the bathroom door open and stuck her head through. She wore an expression that told him she was feeling just as insatiable as he was. "I need a shower. Want to help me wash my back?"
There wasn't an ounce of hesitation in him as he hopped out of bed and sprinted to the shower for Round 2. After all, throwing in the towel after just one round had never been his style.
She woke up shrouded in the darkness of Damon's bedroom, her heart pumping impossibly fast and her hair stuck to her forehead with sweat. After the many orgasms and falling asleep in Damon's arms, she'd hoped that the nightmares would stop. Unfortunately, not even his tight grip around her waist had vanished them. With a little effort, she quietly lifted his arm off of her and crawled out of the bed.
"Where are you going?" he mumbled, holding his head up a few inches and squinting his eyes half open.
"Water," she whispered. "I'll be right back."
The answer seemed to satisfy him as he nodded then dove his face back into the pillow. It was mere seconds before he was sound asleep again, a small snore emitting from him. One thing that would never change about Damon Salvatore was that he slept like a log?
Elena bent down to grab a not so clean black tshirt of Damon's off of the floor. His apartment was unusually unkempt right now. She wasn't stupid enough to think that he cleaned it himself, but the fact that he hadn't been bothered to pay someone to clean it for him was just another sign that he'd put his life on hold for the past week and a half. Never mind the fact that her life wasn't exactly normal right now. What about his?
The shirt wasn't that dirty so she pulled it over her head, reveling in the smell that was Damon. It was an odd comfort for someone who'd just had a nightmare of a man's hands on her throat, but it was a small comfort none the same. She tiptoed her bare feet through the hallway, past the living room, and into the kitchen for a glass of water.
Everything in the apartment was still and quiet. The living room was barely illuminated from the streetlights outside, her clothes were laying there discarded next to Damon's on the floor. Her boots were carefully lined up next to the door. The only light in the kitchen came from the microwave clock and it painted everything in a green hue. The creak of the cabinet opening seemed like it echoed through the empty space and as she drank from the pint glass, the cold liquid soothed her dry throat. She hadn't even noticed it was dry until then. Had she been crying in her sleep?
When she reached up to touch her face, there were dried tears staining her cheeks. The skin under her eyes was puffy and swollen, the way it always was after she'd been crying for far too long. She'd been home for two days now and had yet to sleep uninterrupted by Marcel's face. He stared down at her, his hands firmly gripping her neck, as he watched the life drain from her eyes. When he'd release her enough to call for help, Klaus would come to the rescue. Only what Klaus did to her in her nightmares was much worse.
Elena shuddered and shivered as she took another long drink of water and leaned back against the kitchen counter. Her gaze fell to her legs, to the small bruise on her thigh from being jostled in the back of that van. The fact that this was the only injury she'd suffered was nothing short of a miracle. When she looked at Matt earlier tonight, the guilt twisted in her heart like a knife. Then again, she thought he was lucky. He didn't have to pretend that he was okay. He looked bruised and battered, whereas the things that haunted her weren't visible.
"I think I've got some whiskey if you want something stronger," Damon's voice cut through the silence.
She glanced up from her thigh to his form standing at the edge of the kitchen, the shadows of the dim light bouncing off the muscles of his chest. He raised an arm to scratch the back of his head and let out a yawn. He'd put on black boxer briefs, but had pretty much rolled straight out of bed otherwise. His hair was haphazardly messy and his eyes were still full of sleep.
He took a couple steps closer to her and reached out his hand to hold her cheek. When he felt the tears on her face, his expression softened. "Tell me," he said simply, looking into her eyes to let her know she could.
She shook her head, unable to say the words and that was frustrating. This was what she wanted, wasn't it? She wanted someone to know what she was going through.
"You don't have to pretend you're okay when you're around me, Elena," he encouraged her, leaving a tender kiss on her forehead. He plucked the glass of water from her hand and set it down on the counter next to her and then enveloped her into his arms, resting his chin on top of her head.
Elena let herself relax in his arms and for the first time since she sat in the FBI office, she let the tears fall freely. These weren't tears that managed to escape in her sleep. They were loud sobs that heaved her shoulders despite how tightly he was holding her. She cried because she knew she was safe now, but she couldn't allow herself to fully feel it. She cried because she was a victim and that was something she swore she'd never be again. She cried from the guilt that nestled its way inside of her head and had seemingly taken up permanent residence there. She'd survived, but had she really?
For the better part of an hour, Damon stood there in the kitchen with his arms around her. He didn't press her to talk. He didn't rush her to pull it together. He knew he couldn't because despite how fine she'd been acting, it was very apparent now that she was anything but. And he knew what it was like to feel that kind of despair. Hell, he'd lived in it. Alaric and Rose had pulled him out and now he would do the same for her. But it had to be when she was ready, only when she was ready.
When the tears stopped and had quieted to small sniffles, Elena unburied her face from his bare chest. She gave him a small smile that still felt kind of heavy and swiped at his pecs with her hand to wipe up her tears the best she could. She cleared her throat. Elena Gilbert was a professional at putting on a brave face. "Sorry about that," she apologized.
Damon laced one hand through her tangled waves and planted a kiss on her cheek. "It's fine. I'm here when you need to let go, alright?"
She nodded her head and glanced at the clock on the microwave. "You have to be at the gym in two hours, don't you?"
It was already four in the morning and he grimaced at the prospect of having to go back to how things were before all of this happened. He'd be able to let go of his guilt eventually. He'd gone through this kind of pain before and he could kick again with enough bourbon and fighting. Elena, on the other hand, he got the sense that she was just going through the motions and the pain of watching that wasn't something he looked forward to.
"Yeah. Ric's expecting me at six sharp," he replied, but he didn't loosen his hold on her at all.
"So," she began.
"So?"
"So you need to rest. I have a feeling it'll be a tough day." Elena was always looking out for other people, to a fault. Despite the fact that she was freaking out on the inside. Despite the fact that she wasn't sleeping. Despite any of that, she could always function if she focused her attention of other people's problems. After all, they were much easier to solve.
"Alright, Miss Responsible," Damon said. He let her focus on him since deflecting was her defense mechanism of choice. "Let's get back to bed."
A/N: And here we are! There will be a small time-jump into the next chapter. Not a long one, just a couple of weeks. In the meantime, thank you all for your kind words last chapter. I've got thick skin, but sometimes I get a little down on myself. I mean, who doesn't have those days?
Also, so many people are asking about where things stand with All I Wanted. I have not given up on that story, but every time I sit down and try to write a new chapter I just feel so uninspired. I'm in a rut with it. I do still plan to finish it. I haven't abandoned it. I'm just waiting for my muse to come back around. I know it sucks to wait! I'm sorry, ya'll.