Meredith walked out on to her balcony, her hands finding the iron railing as she leaned against it. There was a slight breeze in the air, dancing through the curly tendrils of her hair. At of all the years she'd been to the resort on this island, she'd never once took the time to actually appreciate the finer things about it. She'd been too busy finding ways to torture her mother or sister to really care. But now, she couldn't think of anything better to do than just stare out into the ocean, her eyes glancing down at the docks every once in a while. Maybe if she'd done this earlier, she would have met Derek earlier. Every summer they'd been so close, but their worlds were completely separate. Despite her desire to forget all of her hesitations, in the back of her mind, she knew that the summer wasn't going to last forever. Derek may want to wait, but what exactly was he going to wait for? A quick summer fling? Meredith didn't know if she could do that to him, let alone herself.

There was potential here. That alone scared the shit out of her. She never thought she'd be someone who could actually see herself with someone. It didn't make sense, but she could. They knew two complete different worlds and lifestyles and there's absolutely no way it would ever work, but that didn't stop her from wishing. Which was incredibly weird and new for her. She didn't wish. She didn't hope and she didn't dream. That wasn't her. She wasn't one of those girls who planned her wedding at the age of five and hoped for prince charming. She thought Cinderella was stupid when she was five. She had asked April what kind of idiot would think they love someone after just meeting them. That's not possible. She still didn't think it was, but Derek was making her second guess everything.

This wasn't what she was expecting this summer to be. She was just supposed to finish off her massive reading list and start preparing for college. Because that's what her life was going to be next year. College. She didn't have time for Derek or feelings or love or dreams. Next year was college. And then after that med school. And then her residency. And then her fellowship. Her life was planned out for her and there was no room a relationship. She couldn't string Derek along like that and then just drop him at the end of the summer. He was too good. Too good for her. He deserved so much that she couldn't offer. Even if her life hadn't been planned out since she was nine. She has a past. One that she didn't want Derek to ever know, and if she let him in, if she allowed him to become a permanent fixture in her life, he would know. People would tell him or he would figure it out. She'd rather him just think of the her as the girl that he could have fallen in love with instead of the girl that he thought he loved until she turned out to be something completely different.

Her mom once told her that love was a virus. You couldn't avoid it forever. It'll get you eventually. It'll infect you and take over everything. If you let it, it'll destroy your life. The only way to survive is to destroy it first, before it spreads. Meredith knew she could tell herself that as much as she wanted, label Derek a virus in her head, but the second she looked into his eyes, it all melted away. She didn't understand it, and she didn't really want to, she just knew that something was preventing her from pushing him away. Something about him seeped through the crevices of the walls she's built up throughout her life and she wasn't even sure if he knew he was doing it. It just happened. She doubted that he could explain it either.

"Mer?"

Meredith turned around to see the door to her room cracked open, her sister's dark brunette hair falling to the side as she peeped her head inside.

"What?" she sighed, walking back into the room and sitting down on her bed.

"Can we talk?"

"Sure, Kath."

"Thanks," she smiled, walking into the room and closing the door behind her. She jumped onto the bed with Meredith, looking up at her big sister. "Okay, so what's wrong with you?"

"Nothing, you're the one that wanted to talk," Meredith shrugged, pulling her hair up into a ponytail and leaning back on to her headboard.

"Yeah, but you look all thoughtful and such. What's up?"

"Nothing, can we just talk about whatever you needed?"

"Fine," Katherine sighed. "So, why do all the guys like you?"

"What? What are you talking about? Guys don't like me. There are no guys. What makes you think there is a guy? You really have no reason to assume there's a guy. None. Because there is none. No one. No guy."

Katherine laughed, "Okay, so I really wasn't meaning it like that, but now I know there something going on. We'll get back to that, but I mean, at home. You're all geeky with your books and working and everything, but there's still like twenty guys drooling over you all the time. What do you do?"

Meredith gave her sister a weird look, having no idea what she was talking about or where in the world this was coming from. "What are you talking about?"

"Okay, do you remember Ethan?" Katherine sighed, hoping she'd eventually be able to clue in her completely oblivious sister.

"Uh, no."

"Tall, gorgeous sandy blond hair, comes here every year, always at dinners with us? Come on, there's no way you don't remember him," Katherine said dramatically, making Meredith roll her eyes.

"We're at a ritzy resort. Half the guys are tall, have sandy blond hair, come here every year, and attend all the functions we're forced to. That description probably narrows it down to like thirty."

"How can you not remember him? He followed us around all the time last year. He would always flirt with you when you were swimming and ask you to dance at the balls. He has those gorgeous brown eyes and his father is some big stock broker."

"Oh, yeah," Meredith laughed. "The guy that thought I was actually impressed by his family's financial status. Even if I was that kind of girl, his is not even close to the estate Mom and Richard have. He was kind of cute, extremely naïve though. And slightly stupid. I mean those eyes? Really not all they seem to be-"

"Hey," Katherine scowled. "Those eyes are gorgeous."

"Wait, you have a thing for that guy? Are you serious?" Meredith asked, trying to stifle a laugh.

"Do not mock me, Meredith Grey. That's not funny. You don't even know him. You probably didn't even give him a chance. You don't give anyone a chance. You and your stupid preconceived notions."

"Okay, so did you come in here to insult me?" Meredith asked, standing up and walking back out to her balcony.

"No. I didn't. It's just, Ethan keeps asking about you."

"And?"

"He like is obsessed with you. When he's not talking about you, we have a great time together, but that's not that often. Him and his friends all think you're like god's gift to the world. It's not fair," Katherine whined, following her sister outside and sitting down on the lounge chair.

"First of all, he's too young for me. He's practically your age, so that's gross. And second of all, I didn't do anything. I danced with him like twice because Mom made me. I barely said a word to him. I didn't bring this on so stop accusing me of stealing your man. I haven't even seen him this year," Meredith answered back as she found her place against the railing once again, her eyes looking out onto the water.

"I know. He's told me numerous times how mysterious you've become. Which brings me to my next question, where the hell have you been?"

"I don't think Mom would like it if she heard you speak like that," Meredith joked, the hint of a smile on her lips.

Katherine rolled her eyes, "No, seriously, Mer. Where do you disappear to every night? You're clearly not sick as April told Mom and I."

"I've just been, doing things," Meredith shrugged.

"Like what?"

Meredith shrugged again, her head falling to rest on her hand as the water completely mesmerized her eyes. She looked across the sand, seeing the little row of shops she'd gotten ice cream from earlier that day with Derek. Some lights caught her attention on the left, but she just ignored the headlights as her sister tried to catch her attention again.

"Why are you daydreaming?"

"I'm not daydreaming."

"Yes you are," Katherine challenged.

"No I'm not."

"Yes, you are."

"No, I'm- Okay, I'm seriously not having this fight with you. Neither of us are two."

"Which is exactly why you should tell me whatever is going on. I'm old enough to know. Come on, you can trust me!" Katherine promised, coming over to Meredith.

"There's nothing to tell."

"So there's no reason you've been on this balcony tonight, staring at the beach that just so happens to have a guy walking on it?"

"What?" Meredith snapped, her eyes searching the beach. Next to the old row of shops she saw the small shadow of a truck. Her eyes followed his trail from the truck to the water, soon landing on Derek's body.

"Yeah, my point exactly," Katherine said smugly.

"Don't you have a bed time or something?" Meredith snapped, propelling herself off the railing and back into her room.

"Nope! It's the summer and I'm thirteen."

"I'm aware of you're age, but shouldn't you at least be in your room?" Meredith questioned, throwing herself into her closet.

Katherine rolled her eyes, "It's next door. I highly doubt anyone cares."

Meredith stopped and came out of her closet, her robe pulled off, standing only in her underwear. "Look, this is me being nice, but you can't take a hint. Get out."

"What's your problem?" Katherine snapped, jumping on to Meredith's bed with absolutely no intention of leaving.

"Seriously, I'm not kidding. Get out."

"Why? So you can sneak out?"

"I'm not sneaking out," Meredith muttered, going back into her closet.

"You sooo are!"

"Shut up, Katherine."

"Who is he?" Katherine asked, getting off of the bed and coming into the closet.

"No one."

"He's no one?"

"Yep."

"And that's why you're staring at your clothes like you need to be in the perfect outfit?"

"Yep."

"Well, since you have absolutely no fashion sense, I'll help you. It's the sisterly thing to do," Katherine said, quickly going through the hangers.

"The sisterly thing to do?"

"Exactly."

"With no ulterior motive?"

"Only in hopes that you decide to be sisterly too."

"And do what?"

"Tell me," Katherine smiled, puling something out. "Okay, so wear these shorts. They're not skimpy, but they're not conservative either. That pretty much defines the small style you have, so it works. And then this tanktop. It's really cute, but simple. It'll accent your skinny body and it's cut low enough to let him see some, but high enough to keep him guessing. I mean, unless he isn't guessing anymore. In that case-"

"Stop talking," Meredith ordered, grabbing the two items out of her sister's hands. "Thanks, really, but get out."

"What? I'm being serious," Katherine said, failing miserably at not laughing. "I don't know the story here. It's quite possible that you're going down there to have your way with him on the beach."

"I'm just going to pretend you never said that," Meredith said, nudging her out of the closet. "I'd prefer to think that my thirteen year old sister didn't even know what sex was."

"So, is there sex involved?" Katherine asked, practically drooling for gossip.

"No, there's no sex involved, now get out!" Meredith ordered, practically shoving her giggling sister out of her room.

Meredith quickly pulled on the outfit before running back out to her balcony. She looked over to the docks and sure enough, Derek was still there. She knew she probably shouldn't be able to recognize him from this far away and in the dark, but she knew it was him. It was weird, but she knew. And despite everything that she had been thinking earlier, she knew she had to be there with him.