Ebon Hawk Part 2
The Ebon Hawk had finally lapsed into silence as it coasted along Hyperspace, on it's way to Kashyykk. Every women on the ship had fallen asleep in their dormitory. T3 had snuck into the Engine Room and deactivated next to it's lover HK. It seemed as though the ship had finally managed to find peace.
That is, until Canderous, Carth and Kar managed to run into each other in the main hold.
Kar rubbed his forehead with a scowl, "You're both complete idiots."
"What're you even doin up?" Canderous snapped back.
Carth brushed away a stray tear and picked himself up off the floor, "I was hungry. Getting tortured . . . I mean hanging out with Mission makes a guy feel pretty starved."
The Jedi threw open a cabinet, pulled out some sort of bar, and absently kept the cabinet door open, "Carth, I honestly think there's something wrong with you."
The soldier shuffled awkwardly to the hologram projector in the center of the main hold. Though he was on the verge of total tears, he was determined to be a tough boy around the rest of the guys. No more crying around them for anything, he had vowed himself. He took a seat and sighed, doing his best to keep his voice from cracking, "Just saying, Mission's kind of a weirdo."
"She's just a fourteen year old girl," Canderous growled, "It's probably a phase. When a Mandalorian girl reaches the age of thirteen they're allowed to bore children. She should consider herself lucky."
Carth stared in bewilderment. Kar awkwardly stopped eating whatever was in his hand and asked, "Don't you think that's a little ridiculous?"
"No?"
Kar rubbed his temples as his soldier companion muttered under his breath, "And to think we almost lost to these guys."
"Show more respect," The Mandalorian said. He pulled out his Datapad and began scrawling all over the screen, "My Mother was quite the strong sixteen year old."
"Somehow, the fact that your mother was sixteen explains a lot Canderous," Kar replied.
"You're all just a bunch of Haters."
"My mom was twenty one I think," Carth interjected, hoping to start a conversation he could actually get through without becoming emotional.
"I would say how old my Mom was if I could even remember my mother," Kar remarked.
"Because of the Jedi right?"
"No, like I literally can't remember anything from more than three months ago including having a Mom."
"Both of you, including emotional cry baby over there," Canderous interjected, "What rhymes with Galactic Laser?"
Kar scratched his head, but Carth piped up first, "Lifesaver?"
"Shut up Carth. Kar, anything?"
The Jedi waved his hands around in the air like he were trying to conjure a word from the Force, "Paper?"
"That's good!"
Carth, feeling more than little miffed, sniffled. He struggled to keep the tears contained, "What're you even writing?"
"Poetry."
Kar almost spat out his food, "You write poetry?"
"Love poetry, to be specific," Canderous grunted guardedly.
Kar, once again, almost spat out his food, "You write love poetry?"
"Man's gotta charm Bastila somehow right?"
"You're still going after her?" Kar rolled his eyes, "You do realize you're chasing a feminist, man hating and constantly PMS'ing Jedi right?"
"Yes I am," The Mercenary replied with a hint of pride, "I swear, the child bearing hips on her . . ."
"I think she kind of likes you," Carth said.
Kar threw away his food and burped loud enough to seemingly make the room quake, "Carth, shut up. You're feeding the man lost hope and also leading him to possible castration by lightsaber."
"Shut it, I wanna hear this," Canderous said. His steely eyes focused on Carth, "Explain."
The soldier, who felt a fledgling sense of happiness in his chest, continued, "Well she did seem concerned for him when we were attacking the Sith base on Manaan."
The Mandalorian smiled devilishly, "That's going into the poem. Both of you watch, this moderately aged man has still got some groove in him."
Kar threw his hands up in exasperation, "Don't say I didn't warn you idiots. When Canderous gets his balls cut off and shoved into his eye sockets, don't come crawling back to me."
He walked off to the men's dormitory. Carth sighed and stood up, "I'm gonna go to bed too," He threw a tentative glance at the Mandalorian, "Unless you wanted to talk?"
"No," Canderous remarked, and continued putting down words on his Datapad. Carth's face dropped and he gloomily jaunted back to the dormitory.
Only Canderous stayed up, putting the finishing touches on his magnum opus of love poetry amidst the silence of the Ebon Hawk.
000
Creating a lightsaber was harder to BS than Kar had originally assumed. He'd found the parts in the Cargo Hold, just as Bastila had said, but after he'd laid down all the necessary parts he realized just how doomed he was. The Focusing crystal, the emitter, the power cell and the lens seemed to mock him as he frustratingly attempted to mash them together into some sort of correct configuration. Nothing worked, and all he was left with was a pile of parts scattered about the floor.
The Cargo Hold door opened behind him. Bastila strode in and crossed her arms, almost smug, "You've been in here for four hours."
Kar picked up the focus crystal and the emitter, mashed them together, and scowled, "I've almost got it."
His female companion swatted the parts out of his hands, "You're a complete lost cause. Then again, you are a man."
"I hate you."
Bastila flicked him between the eyes, "That's women hating right there. Good luck making that thing," she chuckled and walked back toward the door.
Kar glared down at the lightsaber parts with almost molten fury. His pride and stubbornness warred inside his tongue, demanding he do one thing or another. He clicked his teeth together, and drummed his fingers on the deck.
"Bastila," He called, just as she walked out of the door.
Her head popped back in, frowning,"What?"
Kar stared at the parts then turned his head to his fellow Jedi, "Canderous loves you."
The female Jedi shrieked and stormed off. He looked back at the parts, sighed
loudly, and jammed more parts together.
000
"What do you mean, Kashyykk?" Mission snarled.
"That girl you're always whining about," Zaalbar replied, "I met her on Manaan.
Apparently she fucked your brother then left him on Kashyykk."
"Why didn't you bring her to me so I could brutally torture her?" The Twi'lek demanded.
"Because you took Carth before I could get my paws on him!"
"I told you! It was my turn to have him!"
"Completely unfair," Zaalbar growled, then seemed to decide it wasn't worth the argument, "What're you going to do when you reach Kashyykk?"
"Simple!" Mission hissed, "I'm gonna find my brother, and I'm going to kill him. I'm going to pay him back for all those years he left me alone to suffer by myself, hungry and cold in the Lower City."
"I'll get the poisons," The Wookiee rumbled, "Since I know that's what you like to mess with when you're in a brother killing mood."
He trundled off to the Cargo Hold.
Mission deflated onto her bed and blew out a breath. She'd finally found her brother. It didn't even seem real. For years she'd dreamed of vengeance, of some kind of murderous revenge that would cure her endless rage. Every time she closed her eyes, all she could see was Lena and Griff, riding off together while she was left behind. For a fourteen year old girl, she was sure thoughts like those weren't healthy. Most teenagers tried on make up, went to parties or went to school. She had shot Vulkars and hustled gang members out of their money. It seemed her entire life in the Lower City had prepared her to make the final shot, right between her brother's eyes.
"Planning to kill somebody?"
Mission opened her eyes. She hadn't even realized she had closed them. Juhani had appeared out of nowhere, lounging on the bed across from her. Her sharp teeth were bared in a knowing smile.
"My brother," She replied easily.
"How interesting," The Cathar chuckled, "I heard everything by the way. If you plan to kill somebody, just ask me. I can help you."
"I thought you were a Jedi."
"I am," She assured, "But that doesn't mean I haven't picked up other skills. There is much I could teach you."
"And just what," Mission pulled her blaster out from under her pillow, and examined it, "Could you teach me?"
"There's plenty you could learn," Juhani responded, "But only if you'd let me teach you."
Suddenly, Zaalbar walked back into the room with a case full of vials. Inside the vials were liquids of different colors, ranging from bright to sinisterly dark, "Sorry about the wait, Kar threw a fit when I walked into the Cargo Hold. I had to hold him down for a quite a long time!"
Mission stood and holstered her blaster. She eyed the Jedi carefully. A part of her doubted the woman was really a Jedi, after all she definitely didn't seem to act like one, "We'll talk. Right now, Zaalbar and I have to go through inventory."
Juhani nodded and strode out, tossing back words behind her shoulder, "Tell me when you're ready to learn, and I shall teach you."
Mission watched her leave, and made a mental note to keep a close eye on her in the future. Then again, her brain said, if she could teach her to be a better killer, it might be worth speaking to her again. On the other hand, the Cathar could just be testing her somehow. The Twi'lek shook her head and picked up the brightest colored vial in the case, "This is about to get interesting."
000
Bastila liked practicing out in the garage. It was free flowing and hardly anything was there save a single discarded speeder bike. It was the perfect place for practicing her lightsaber abilities. Nobody really ever went there unless they happened to be going to the female dormitory. Besides that she had the space to herself. She just so happened to be practicing her favorite Katas and sparring techniques when a voice startled her into almost slashing the roof of the ship.
"You look cute when you swing that lightsaber around."
The Jedi Padawan stopped, face stony, and turned to see Canderous leaning in the doorway to the garage. An intruder is what she saw him as. A smelly, ridiculously stupid intruder who was invading her personal work area.
"What do you want?" She asked, irritated. A large part of her psyche encouraged her to slash his face in half and just be done with it all, but she silenced this portion of her brain. As fun as it would be to murder Canderous, she knew the Masters wouldn't approve. Then again, nobody on the ship would really care. Deciding against it, she deactivated her lightsaber and crossed her arms defensively.
The Mandalorian cocked his head slightly, "Why do you hate men?"
"If you hadn't noticed," She grumbled back, "I'm surrounded by complete morons who don't know what they're doing. Not to mention you're all just pigs trying to get my clothes off anyway."
"I don't want to take your clothes off," He countered, "Mandalorians choose women in a very different sort of fashion. If they also happen to be attractive, well that's just an extra bonus."
"Sometimes all I want to do is chop off both of your feet and kick you, Canderous."
He blinked, "That escalated quickly."
"I hate you so much."
The former Mercenary sauntered fully into the garage, striding past her to lean against the swoop bike, "Eh, you know you love me on the inside."
"I think I dislike your insides more than your outsides, actually."
"Does that mean you think I'm attractive?"
"I'm a Jedi, idiot," She snapped, "I wouldn't find you attractive even if I did, somehow, like you in any way shape or form!"
"So . . . If I asked you out on a hunt with me would you probably say no?"
"There is no 'probably', there's only 'no'."
Silence for several seconds. The two stared at each other stubbornly before Canderous stood up off of the Swoop Bike, "Wanna fight?"
Bastila's eyebrow arched, "What?"
"Hand to hand combat," He smiled widely, "Since I like fighting and you like beating me up, let's make this courting interesting."
"One, this isn't courting. Two, don't you remember me kicking your ass on Hrakert Station?"
"I let you win that one," He corrected.
The Mandalorian raised his fists and entered into a basic combat stance. Bastila smiled evilly and entered into a stance of her own. Jedi were taught hand to hand combat alongside Lightsaber techniques, and luckily she was proficient in both. She knew it was probably frowned upon to be baited into a fight like this, but the opportunity to throw Canderous around was to sweet on her lips to pass up. Not to mention, it would send a message to every male on the ship.
The smile stayed on her face as she charged.
Kar was dozing in the main hold when a massive crash from the garage woke him up. Scrambling to avoid falling out of his chair, he stumbled awkwardly onto his feet and stumbled to the source of the noise. What he found made him think he was dreaming.
Canderous was on the ground, lip busted and nose bleeding, trying to get out of a chokehold which Bastila had somehow wrestled him into. The female Jedi herself had lost her twin ponytails and had a large bruise on her cheek. The two were so busy struggling for dominance they didn't even notice Kar.
Kar's eye twitched, "What the bloody Force is going on here?!"
Both combatants finally noticed him. Canderous managed to free his neck from the chokehold enough to actually speak, "Just part of the courting process."
"Shut up," Bastila hissed.
"Oh for Force's sake," Kar shouted, "You're both insane."
"Spoken perfectly for a sexist pig!"
At this point, the entire crew had gathered into the garage to see what all the commotion was about. Mission jeered, "Fight, fight, fight!"
Kar faceplalmed, "Screw this. Zaalbar, split them apart Force damnit!"
The Wookiee lumbered out of the crowd of crewmates and easily split the two apart, holding them by the scruffs of their necks. Bastila sent a final punch at Canderous, who waved it off. Zaalbar growled, either from ecstasy or warning, and held the quarrelers further apart.
"Why did you stop the fight? Bastila demanded, "He was about to tap!"
"I wasn't tapping," Canderous grumbled, "I was about to reverse the whole thing on you."
"Why were you two fighting?" Carth asked.
"He thought he could beat me," Bastila jerked a thumb at the former Mercenary, "Typical male machoism. To bad I absolutely kicked his ass."
"Nuh uh," Canderous scoffed.
"Yuh huh!"
"Nuh uh!"
"Yuh huh!"
"Both of you shut up!" Kar snarled, "Zaalbar, put Canderous in the Medical Bay again! And make sure Bastila doesn't come near there either. Last thing we need is a murder investigation on this ship."
Zaalbar nodded, "Very well. Carth, would you like to join me?"
The soldier paled, "I'm good."
Pouting, the Wookiee dropped Bastila and pulled Canderous reluctantly to the Medical Bay. Kar sighed, "Bastila, I think you're insane."
She glared at him with the intensity of a thousand suns, "Built that lightsaber yet?"
"Shut the hell up!"
000
"Uh, Kar?"
The Jedi threw down the lightsaber parts. He glanced over his shoulder. Zaalbar filled out the Cargo Bay door.
"What is it?"
"Uh, I just wanted to ask why there's an orange droid in the Engine room?"
"What?!"
"I was wandering around the ship looking for bread crumbs, and I opened the engine room door cuz I figured there'd be food there. As soon as the door opened I I saw some orange droid trying to hide in the engine room."
Kar's grit his teeth, "For Force's sake there's to much going on on this ship. I'll handle it you oaf."
"I'll go get Carth for a human shield just in case!"
By the time Kar got to the engine room, T3 was already there, whistling and beeping wildly at the orange droid Zaalbar had described.
"Apology: I'm sorry T3, I wanted to see you so badly I could not bear to stay hidden!"
T3 screeched something about murdering the Wookiee before he could talk. Kar yelled, "T3, what is going on here?"
The Droid wheeled around and spit out a sequence of beeps so violent and loud, Kar had to muffle his ears. The orange droid regarded him with significantly less hostility, staying neutrally behind the astromech droid.
Carth peeked inside of the Engine bay, "What's going on?"
"Explanation: I'm afraid my lover, T3, is rather angry with me for being caught on this ship. He's incredibly irate at the moment."
"Lover?" Bastila stormed into the engine bay, spooking Carth, "Can a woman go a single day without being interrupted from her meditation?"
"Apparently," Kar said, "This droid and T3 were having a secret affair on the ship, however that works."
T3 beeped wildly.
"What do you mean true love? You were in 'true love' with the Ebon Hawk four weeks ago!"
The next sequence of whistles made Carth yelp at the profanity.
"It didn't work out? What do you mean her voice sounded way to much like a tutorial voice?"
"Interjection: Excuse me," HK broke in, "But all this talk of my lover's former partners isn't important. I'm with him now. I never meant to start problems with anybody. Though I am Assassin droid, I have a soft core in my chassis."
Carth sidled up next to Bastila and whispered, "Did he just say he was an Assassin's droid?"
"This doesn't surprise me," The Jedi replied, "It really doesn't."
Meanwhile, T3 and Kar were still arguing. After a long string of beeps, whistles, whorbles and boops, the male Jedi relented to keeping HK on the ship.
"I swear that thing better help us, since it's an Assassin's droid," He growled, "And make sure it doesn't slaughter us when we're asleep. Actually, just make sure it doesn't slaughter me. I hate you all."
He stalked back to the Cargo bay. Bastila and Carth awkwardly walked away from the robot couple, leaving them to some privacy.
HK sighed happily, "Relieved statement: Oh T3, I'm so happy I can help you and your friends with this quest of yours. We can finally express our love in public!"
T3's vocal systems whirred and buzzed, but it didn't reply.
000
The end of the day came, and once again the Ebon Hawk plunged into a startling silence. Canderous, Kar and Carth actually managed to fall asleep, while HK and T3 powered down together in the engine room. Zaalbar fell asleep near the food processor, smears of food caking his fur.
The women were the last to sleep. Mission shifted and restlessly turned in her sleep. Juhani slept soundly, but always tense. Her muscles tight as her sharp nails gripped the pillow in a death grip. She seemed ready to pounce at any moment.
Bastila was the last to slide under her sheets and press her head against the pillow. She frowned. The pillow felt stiffer than she remembered. Pushing herself up quietly, she eyed the pillow suspiciously. The Jedi pulled it off of the mattress and saw a Datapad resting where the pillow had once been. Curious, she picked the Datapad up and clicked the power button.
Immediately, a text opened on the screen.
From Canderous to Bastila,
Such a beautiful Jedi you are
So fine and polished like after I wash a car
You're bright, like a galactic laser
I chose to put my love of you down on digital paper
You were worried for me in the Sith Base at Ahto City
So I believe you care about me
I am a Mandalorian and you are a Jedi
I know you cannot stand I
But truly if you feel the same way
Surely we can throw that hate away
And simply love one another
Like toast loves butter
You be butter and I'll toast
And hopefully that will be good enough for us both
-Canderous PS: Nice punch
Bastila, who read the whole poem with cheeks a bright red and eyes burning, placed the Datapad to the side and picked up her pillow, putting it back in it's original position. She glared at the Datapad for some time, still resting against the wall her cot was parallel to. The only way Canderous could have known about that situation in Ahto City was from either Carth or Kar. Finally, the Jedi shook her head and went to sleep as the Ebon Hawk hurtled toward Kashyykk.
'Stupid men', was her last thought before drifting off to sleep.