Chapter title taken from the Green Day song of the same name.
Comment time!
To The Keeper of Worlds: You are right, my friend. And shit is going down.
And to emiya-excalibur: *author's evil grin increases with tension* I can't wait to read your thoughts on this chapter.
You might wanna listen to "21 Guns" to start this chapter…
Do you know what's worth fighting for when it's not worth dying for?
Does it take your breath away and you feel yourself suffocating?
Does the pain weigh out the pride and you look for a place to hide?
Did someone break your heart inside? You're in ruins…
-"21 Guns". Green Day, 21st Century Breakdown.
Throbbing pain.
That was the first thing that registered in Kazumi's mind as she came to. The last thing she remembered was Bakugo reaching for her hand and just grazing her fingers as she was pulled away from him. Reaching for the back of her head, she felt something dried and crusted beneath her water-hair.
Blood.
It had been bandaged, sure, but the dried blood was still there.
Toga. Twice. The fire… Kacchan! Where is he?
She was in some kind of underground cell, she realized, as the events that had transpired came rushing back into her head. She'd been kidnapped—again—and this time she was alone. Bakugo wasn't there to help her this time.
"Ooh, the water kitten is awake!"
Kazumi looked up to see Toga on the other side of the window that allowed them to see into her cell.
"You were so pretty with your bleeding head! It's too bad we had to bandage it."
"Why did you take me?"
"Simple. I really like the whole blood aspect of your Quirk! And you're my boyfriend's sister, which means that we're best friends by default!"
I can think of several words to describe that scenario…
Namely, delusional and psychotic.
"Well, actually, Shigaraki asked us to bring you in. Isn't that great? You're gonna be the newest member of the League."
"Didn't you guys try this already? And didn't I quite explicitly turn down that offer?"
"Yeah but this time, we have a plan to make you join us."
Kazumi narrowed her eyes, backing away so that her shoulders were against the wall. She felt safer, but not by much as Toga grinned.
"I got some of your blood yesterday. It tastes so sweet—type O, right? I didn't swallow much—just enough to get a taste."
"So your powers work like Stain's?"
"Oh, I forgot you went against Stainy! So yes, my Quirk does work like that with the exception of it just depends on how much I swallow."
A shiver went up the water hero's spine.
She still had nightmares about the Stain fight, most of which stemmed from her being paralyzed and stabbed. Watching her brothers and Iida get hurt hadn't helped, either.
"What are your plans for me?"
Instead of answering, Toga stepped aside to reveal Shigaraki without the hands. Kazumi realized she actually preferred the creepy accessories upon seeing the man's face for the first time. His eyes were still wide as he stared at her with interest.
"Kazumi Midoriya-Todoroki. Born to Rei and Enji Todoroki with her twin brother, Shoto. Abandoned at the age of three because her Quirk wasn't what Endeavor wanted. Adopted at the age of four by the Midoriyas, becoming the beloved sister of Izuku Midoriya. And the love of Katsuki Bakugo. How do you think your family would react if you joined the League? They'd be broken."
I'm not his actual target. He wants my Quirk, but he wants to break down my loved ones, too.
That's why they took me in front of Kacchan—to break him.
But it'll take more than that.
"Now, Miss Midoriya, shall we begin our fun?"
His smile did nothing to make her think this was going to be fun.
"You just rest, Katsuki. Inko sent some soup for you."
"Okay."
Mitsuki bit her lip as her son walked slowly upstairs.
It had been three days since the fire and he'd been oddly quiet during that time. The argumentative, prideful, stubborn boy she'd raised was gone, and in his place was somebody complacent and nonconfrontational. That worried her more than his injuries, which had healed much quicker thanks to Recovery Girl, but he'd refused to be healed all the way. And now the hospital had cleared him to go home to finish out the process before returning to UA.
But he'd told her something the day before.
"I'm not going back to UA. I can't be a hero if I couldn't even save the person I care about most."
Kazumi's absence was hitting hard. Especially since the news had leaked that she was a lost daughter of the Todoroki family—news that Endeavor had confirmed as true and stated that he was going to do everything in his power to bring her back to safety. In fact, that had been what took over every news outlet in Japan.
Lost Todoroki kidnapped by League.
Inko, despite her daughter being missing, was putting her emotions aside to be strong for her remaining child. Izuku remained at UA but he didn't talk to anyone but his girlfriend, daughter, and his sister's twin. UA itself had been put on lockdown over the past couple days, so Katsuki's classmates had been unable to visit after that had been put into place.
Still, her son was hurting emotionally.
Bakugo stared at the picture of Kazumi Kirishima had given him months earlier. Her smile was bright and happy, making his heart clench all the more for her presence. In the corner of his room sat his grenade gauntlets, covered by a sheet that he'd thrown over them as soon as he'd gotten home. He didn't want to look at them, not when they'd been so useless in saving the girl he loved.
Love.
That was the truth about his feelings for Kazumi. He was truly and deeply in love with her. And he'd failed her when it mattered most. He had no right to be a hero when that had happened.
Everyone says I have an amazing Quirk. But it was useless in that situation.
Deku would've been able to save her.
Icy-Hot would've been able to save her.
Hell, even Round-Face would've been able to do it.
But I couldn't. Because I'm useless without my Quirk.
He rolled over and covered his head with his blanket.
Why? Why hadn't he been fast enough to grab her? Why hadn't he noticed the smell of gasoline beforehand? Why had he let them split up and given the villains the opportunity to take her away?
Blood. Blood dripping through her hair, off the strands and onto the pavement. Normally bright ice-blue eyes dull and half-lidded. And a blonde villain with a knife, gripping Kazumi's hair as she slammed her head into the pavement.
Eventually, he fell asleep clutching the picture that had become a precious item.
Dust swirled with the smoke around him. He was in Camino Ward, surrounded by the League and he could hear All-Might fighting All For One in the background. But he could also feel Kazumi's back pressed against his.
This is… this is the first time she was kidnapped.
"Watch my back and I'll watch yours, Kacchan," she told him.
"Kazumi, I'm glad you're here."
"What's with you calling me 'Kazumi' all of a sudden?"
"Because you're not just my rival anymore. I really care about you, you know."
"Yeah, I know." Her voice became distorted and he turned to see her bleeding from the forehead.
"Kazumi?!"
"Even… though… you're an asshole… I love you…"
She fell forward, him moving to catch her before she hit the ground.
"Hey, no! I can't lose you!"
"Go. I'll be fine."
Fire began to consume her as she turned to steam in his arms, the hot vapor scalding him. He let out a pain-filled scream. And then the villains descended.
"Why not join us, Bakugo?"
Shigaraki's voice echoed.
"You let our sister die."
Deku and Icy-Hot stood in front of him.
"Young Bakugo, you will never be a hero."
All-Might's tone was full of disapproval.
"No! I tried!" he pleaded. "I couldn't… I couldn't save her!"
"Please, after the way you broke her heart?"
Now Pinky was there.
"You didn't actually try."
"No…"
"VILLAIN."
"MURDERER."
"UNWORTHY."
"BASTARD."
The words swirled around him, the faces of his tormentors all morphing into one until it became four-year-old Kazumi protecting Deku the day they met.
"I hate bullies!"
"Kazumi, please!" he begged.
"I hate you!"
"Please, I tried to save you!"
She grew into the teenager he knew her as now.
"If you really tried… I'd still be here. You're useless without your Quirk. It's all flash and no substance. You can't be a hero if you can't even save the girl you supposedly love. All you did was abandon me again. Just like my father did."
"I'm not him!"
"Liar."
Bakugo awoke with a gasp, shaking violently.
His room was completely dark, save for the sliver of moonlight coming through the window. There was slight pain in his hand as he looked to see he was still holding the picture of Kazumi. A paper-cut sliced through his thumb, but thankfully no blood had gotten onto the picture itself. Her smile was still perfectly preserved.
"Kazumi…" he whispered, still trembling. "I'm so sorry. I'm so so sorry…"
Tears streamed down his cheeks and dripped onto the photo.
"Please… I need you. I'm going insane. I need you here."
Kazumi screamed in pain as another slight shock went through her.
These shocks, on any normal person, would've been just enough to make them jump and feel a little tingly. But thanks to her water-body, they caused her excruciating pain. Shigaraki smirked at her as he had Twice throw the switch again, sending another wave through her body.
"So, it's been four days. Are you ready to try using your Quirk for us yet?" he asked.
"N-never… you're all fucking insane…"
"I guess you need more time." He tilted his head. "After all, you've been abandoned again. Last time we took you, you were only here a day before the heroes found us. Why is it taking longer this time?"
She gasped for breath, panting.
"Perhaps it's because they don't care. You're Endeavor's daughter but that doesn't mean anything. Everyone has left you but us."
"Liar…"
"Hm?"
"Y-you're lying. They're just having more trouble… finding… this place…"
"Aw. You think they're coming for you."
"They are."
"Let's see how you feel tomorrow, Kazumi. Toga, your turn."
"NO!" screamed Kazumi as Toga opened the cell and slapped anti-Quirk cuffs on her. She wasn't able to fight back in her weakened state.
"Be good, Zumi-Zumi!" giggled Toga, taking out a needle. "After all, you can't be escaping from here too soon! How else will I get Izuku to come take me on a date?"
She pressed the needle into Kazumi's arm and pressed it, pumping the light tranquilizer drug into Kazumi's veins before pulling out a small knife which she used to make a cut in the other girl's shoulder. Blood seeped from the wound and Toga collected it.
"You… bitch…" sobbed Kazumi.
"You're waiting for your knight in shining grenade gauntlets, aren't you, Zumi-Zumi? But he's not coming. Last I heard, our little fire put him in the hospital for a while. Isn't that great? You'll be my best friend forever!"
The anti-Quirk cuffs went off and a bowl of broth was left in front of Kazumi. With what little strength and consciousness she had left, Kazumi ate the meager offering. She had to stay strong. They'd come for her eventually. Right?
Maybe Shigaraki's right.
That damn voice was there again.
Just join him and things will be better.
No. They'll come for me. I know they will.
You've been abandoned, foolish girl.
Izuku would never willingly do that to me.
Maybe he would. He has Ochaco and their daughter now. He doesn't need you.
Shut up! Shut. Up! I silenced you once and I can do it again! I'm not being abandoned.
She felt the world slipping away around her and gave in to sleep.
I'm going to be rescued.
"How's Kacchan doing?"
"He's not doing well, to be honest. Not being able to save Kazumi has been rough on him."
"I bet," sighed Kirishima, rubbing the back of his head. "Add that to his injuries and it's had to have been a massive source of guilt for him."
A week had passed since Kazumi had been taken by the League and the lockdown had been lifted enough so that Izuku, Todoroki, and Kirishima were able to visit Bakugo while he was still healing. Mitsuki had let them in but warned them that her son wasn't in the best state emotionally. Izuku figured he'd gotten violent and angrier while missing Kazumi and lamenting his wounds.
What he didn't expect was seeing one of his oldest friends lying on the bed, listless and depressed, clutching a photo in his hands in the dark. Dark circles were under his eyes as if sleep had eluded him for a while. Not to mention there was a sheet thrown over some objects in the corner; peeking under them revealed the grenade gauntlets from Bakugo's hero costume, still flame-damaged from the night of the fire and clearly not tended to since then.
"Bakugo, dude, you've got to snap out of this," Kirishima sighed. "It's been a week and we need you back at school."
"Yes," agreed Todoroki. "The dormitories have been quiet without you."
"And we're worried," added Izuku, frowning. "It's not like you to be like this."
"Why don't you say what you really think?"
The response came as a low, pain-filled growl.
"What are you talking about?" Bakugo shot up and faced them, placing his feet on the floor.
"You blame me for what happened to Kazumi—you and Icy-Hot. It's my fault your sister got taken by the League. My fault she was hurt and probably badly burned. It's my fault."
"Kacchan—"
"Whatever. I'm staying right here."
"You must come back to school eventually," Todoroki pointed out. "Our second year is beginning soon."
"Fuck that."
"Dude, come on!" Kirishima groaned. "Look, she got taken. It sucks. Especially because you love her so much."
"It's not just because I love her. She felt the exact same way. I know she did. And it makes it so much worse. I've done so much shit to her over the years and she still loved me. I fucked it all up. I'm the screw-up who made it impossible for her to do what she wanted to do with her life. How can I be a hero if I couldn't even save the girl I love more than anything?"
"What are you saying?"
"I'm saying that I'm dropping out of UA."
"No, you can't!"
"Bakugo, please, you don't need to take such a rash measure. As heroes, it's impossible for us to save everyone."
"But I could've saved her if I wasn't so useless with my Quirk—"
SMACK!
Izuku had slapped Bakugo.
Izuku had slapped Bakugo.
"Deku?!" gasped Bakugo.
"I keep trying to think of Kazumi in this situation: what she'd do, what she'd say, how she'd react…" His voice was quiet. "Slapping you is exactly what she would've done, along with screaming at you for even thinking of giving up being a hero. No, she's not here. And it's not your fault that what happened happened. But you can't just give up because of her. She wouldn't want that. She'd want you to keep moving, to save people so they don't end up like her. And even though she's not with us right now, she's still alive. She's still out there. And we're going to find her. But we need your help and moping in the dark isn't going to find her or let you get the closure you need. So are you going to give up or are you going to be the hero that Kazumi would want you to be?"
Bakugo was stunned.
"Izuku's right," Kirishima spoke up. "You need to move forward. Even All-Might couldn't save every person when he was still active. Part of being a hero is understanding that."
The explosive blonde trembled as he looked down at the picture in his hands. It was one of Kazumi that Izuku recognized as having been a candid from their first night in the dorms. The photo was slightly crumpled around the edges, as if Bakugo had been holding it tightly for the past week.
"She's definitely not dead," Todoroki sighed. "I can feel it."
"Is that some twin thing?" Izuku asked.
"It is. Think of it as like an invisible string between myself and Kazumi. I can't exactly tell where she is, only that she's alive. And that she's in pain."
"If the League has her, they want her Quirk—the blood-controlling part of it. With All For One in prison, they have no way to take it by force. So they're probably trying to turn her to their side."
"In other words, the longer she's with the League, the less likely it is that we'll be able to get her back," Kirishima clarified. "We've gotta tell the teachers. You coming back, Bakugo?"
"I… I need to think. Go on ahead. I'll give you an answer tomorrow."
"Okay. But we really do miss ya at the dorms. Hope you sort through all this."
"I will see you tomorrow," Todoroki stated, turning to leave with Kirishima.
Izuku lingered behind.
"Kacchan, I'm sorry for slapping you. But your Quirk isn't useless. Just because you couldn't use it in that one situation doesn't mean you're useless. Think of ways to fight without it. And that'll help you when things go like they did again."
"You knew about the note, didn't you."
"The one on the back of the picture? Yeah, I did."
"Is that why you gave me the albums?"
"Yeah. I… in case we're too late to find her, I wanted you to know how she felt. Even if the past couple months have been rough. You both deserve that much." He sighed. "Well, hope I see you tomorrow."
He started to follow Kirishima and Todoroki.
"Hey, Deku."
Izuku turned.
"Thank you."
There was gratitude in Bakugo's voice, and that made Izuku smile.
"You're welcome."
Stay strong, Kazumi. They'll find you.
Last time, they had the trackers and police information to go off of. This time, they don't have anything. All they know is that I've been kidnapped by three known members of the League.
If I stay strong, they can't break me.
I have to be a hero. I can't back down.
But I can't take much more of the torture. I can't. My body will give out.
Maybe… maybe if I play along… and wait until the time is right…
Yeah. That's what I need to do.
Play along. And they'll stop hurting me. But they won't break me.
It's just like playing pretend with Green Brother and Kacchan when we were kids.
God, I hope they find me soon.
"So, have you made a decision yet?" Shigaraki asked.
"I have." She smirked at him. "I'll join your little group."
"Excellent. And if you ever betray us…" His eyes widened. "I'll kill you, slowly and painfully."
"I would expect nothing less."
"Well, then, welcome to the League, Kazumi Midoriya."
"For now, just call me the Puppetmaster."
I hate this.
"If that's the case, then we welcome the Puppetmaster to the League."
He laughed maniacally and she felt herself dying a little inside.
"VILLAIN."
"MURDERER."
"UNWORTHY."
"BASTARD."
Once again, the insults and torment swirled around him, screaming out his failures for all the world to hear. He dropped to his knees, covering his ears to block out the sound… but there was Kazumi again, bleeding and calling him a liar.
It was too much. Too much for him to handle.
I can't be a hero.
"Stop it, you sons of bitches!"
A very familiar voice broke through those of his tormentors. He looked up just in time to see Kazumi get punched through the chest… by Kazumi? The one who was bleeding fell forward, fading until she was nothing but a faint shadow. The one that remained held out a hand to him.
"You okay, Kacchan?"
"Kazumi… you don't blame me?"
"Of course not. It's part of the hazards of being a hero. We get targeted. Bad things happen and we can't stop them, but we have to move forward. If we lose people we care about, then we remember the good times instead of failures."
Camino Ward began to ripple and dissolve, instead turning into the playground where they'd met as kids. A small girl with water-hair in pigtails put a flower-crown on a boy with fluffy green hair, making him smile as she took out a small camera.
"There, pretty," she told him.
"You did a great job, Kazumi."
"Thanks!"
"Hey, Water Witch!" called a small boy with blonde hair.
"What do you want, Kacchan?"
"How come you always make girly stuff for Deku like that?"
"Because none of the other girls wanna hang out with me. And Zuku doesn't mind!"
"I don't," agreed Izuku, smiling.
"Yeah, well, no boys are gonna like you but him!"
"Boys are gross. Izuku doesn't count because he's my brother and my best friend."
"Girls are gross!"
"Nuh-uh!"
"Yeah they are!"
"How about you two just kiss and get it over with?" sighed a teenager with glasses, passing by. "That's where this kind of story usually goes."
"GROSS!" both kids yelled.
"Grown-ups do it all the time," Izuku pointed out. "So it can't be that gross."
"I'll show you!" snapped the younger Bakugo. "C'mon, Water Witch! Bet you're scared!"
"No, I'm not! I can do it!"
They pecked each other on the lips briefly, Izuku managing to capture the moment with the small camera. Then the scene faded and he could see other memories of himself and Kazumi and Izuku—playing Heroes VS Villains, falling asleep side-by-side at naptime during preschool, that time he snuck a horror movie over to the Midoriyas during a sleepover… all of it showing the good times he'd had with Kazumi.
Then came the more recent memories.
Watching her fight at the Sports Festival. Their brief partnership in Camino Ward. Saving Eri. The Fall Festival. And the dance.
"You need to remember me like this," the Kazumi in front of him said. "Not as the bleeding girl you couldn't save, but as the person you fell in love with. Somebody who would want you to move forward. Because that's what love is—being able to remember someone long after they're gone and cherishing what time you did have."
"Kazumi…"
"I love you, Kacchan." She kissed him on the cheek (even in dream form, she was still four inches shorter than him) and backed away. "And you're going to be a hero."
He woke up, feeling well-rested and like there was something on his cheeks. It was dried tearstains.
Kazumi thinks I can be a hero?
Well, then…
Bakugo smirked.
I'm coming to save you, Water Witch.
WHOOP THERE IT IS
I told you guys that this was going to be more densely packed with feels. Also, I hope you listened to "21 Guns" by Green Day at least once while reading this chapter. The song is a lot less hopeful than this chapter was in the end, but whatever. It's still where the chapter title came from.
Next time, it's off to find our water girl!
So long and thanks for all the fish!